Dame Diana Rigg and Neil Dudgeon Celebrity Antiques Road Trip

The nation's favourite celebrities...

-We are special then, are we?

-Oh, that's excellent.

..paired up with an expert...

We're a very good team, you and me.

..and a classic car.

Their mission - to scour Britain for antiques.

I've no idea what it is.

Oh, I love it.

The aim - to make the biggest profit at auction.

Yes!

But it's no easy ride.

THEY GASP

There's no accounting for taste.

Who will find a hidden gem?

Who will take the biggest risks?

Will anybody follow expert advice?

-Do you like them?

-No.

There will be worthy winners and valiant and losers.

-Are you happy?

-Yes.

-Promise?

-Ecstatic.

Time to put your pedal to the metal.

This is Celebrity Antiques Road Trip.

Yeah.

Today's Celebrity Road Trip brings together two acting titans.

-Well done. Good change.

-There you are.

-That's a nice gear change, wasn't it?

-Absolutely seamless.

I'll stop now before it all goes horribly wrong.

We're in the presence of a Dame.

Legendary actress Dame Diana Rigg is back in the country of her birth.

-Hello, Yorkshire.

-Yorkshire.

She's joined by fellow actor Neil Dudgeon,

another native Yorkshireman.

God's own country.

-GEARS CRUNCH

-Oh!

Oh, not so good. There we are. That's it.

You're giving the car stomach ache every time that happens.

Diana Rigg has been a screen icon for almost 50 years,

bursting onto the scene as secret agent Emma Peel

in the 1960s television series The Avengers.

Whether she's playing a glamorous Bond girl,

a Doctor Who baddie or, more recently, her Emmy award-nominated

part in the global phenomenon Game Of Thrones,

she's used to playing strong leading roles.

She's also no stranger to antiques.

I imagine you have a lovely few antiques of your own, Diana.

If I happen to be in a place, for example, on tour,

I'll seek out antiques shops and such

and it's a wonderful way of, you know, spending your afternoon off.

Yes. Yes.

Neil is behind the wheel of a 1964 Rover 110.

A distinguished character actor, his most notable role to date is

Inspector Barnaby in Midsomer Murders.

But will he be able to use his detective skills

to procure some purchases and negotiate some deals?

How are you at bargaining?

I do quite like to haggle. I'm always surprised...

You see, I think it's one of those things where people

offer at a price, thinking, "We'll say, I don't know, 200 quid,"

and then you say, "20 quid,"

everybody snorts and leaves the room, they come back and go, "100 quid,"

and you think, "You've already knocked off more than I'd have asked

-"for if I'd suggested another price."

-I see.

So I think it's always worth...

It's always worth trying it on, isn't it?

It certainly is.

Diana and Neil are no stranger to each other in the roles

they're playing today.

In the BBC series The Mrs Bradley Mysteries...

The quintessential English village.

..Neil was chauffeur to Diana's lady detective.

Did you know, a gentleman always escorts a lady on the street side

to protect her from splashes, foot pads and marauders?

Yes. More to the point,

-did you manage to pick pocket that key from Miss Bunting?

-Mm.

Well done, George.

Although chauffeuring Dame Diana is not coming as easily to Neil today.

Not sure that anything I'm doing with my feet or hands is having any

effect on this car.

-Uncoordinated.

-It's like Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

Our celebs aren't alone in their quest.

Heading to meet up with our acting royalty are antiques experts

and auctioneers Paul Laidlaw and Catherine Southon.

We are on a mission.

And anticipation is mounting in the 1992 Alfa Romeo Spider.

Diana Rigg. Now, she is sensational.

I mean, she's just an icon.

-Beautiful. Avengers, leaping over the car.

-James Bond's wife.

-Vault.

-I'm not expecting a catsuit, though.

-Aren't you?

-That would be wrong, wouldn't it?

-Well...

I'd say a step too far, yes.

Our experts are also intrigued about screen super-sleuth Neil's

antique buying capabilities.

He's good things like murders and, you know, investigating.

I think he'll be great at hunting down the antiques.

The teams have £400 to spend on their trip, which,

over the next couple of days, takes them through the heart of Yorkshire,

ending up at an auction in Stansted, Essex.

Wow.

Our experts and celebrities are meeting at Brodsworth Hall,

a country house just outside the town of Doncaster.

Do either of you come with the experience of our world, antiques?

First of all, you've got to base it on instinct, haven't you?

-You have. Absolutely.

-Guts take you a long way.

Isn't that nice to hear?

-I'm not sure. My strongest instinct is never to trust my instinct.

-Oh.

-Darling!

-What? Is that wrong?

-Oh!

-All these years!

-So, you can't be spontaneous.

-Hang on.

Yes, I can.

So, two contrasting approaches from our celebrities.

Diana trusting her well-honed instincts and Neil, well,

not trusting himself at all.

For this little adventure, Diana is teaming up with Paul

and Neil with Catherine.

If you're going to be in that, you need a beret.

That would be lovely. My hair has been going haywire.

-Guess what I've got.

-Fantastic.

-A spangly beret.

-I do love a bit of sparkle.

-Do you think I could sell this, actually...

-No.

-..at the auction?

-Could you autograph this?

-PAUL: Steady, Catherine.

-I don't want to look like Frank Spencer.

-No, you don't.

-You look Francaise.

-Do I?

-Yes.

-Oh, hello.

-Let's go to France.

-Bonjour. Excuse-moi.

-Au revoir!

Oh-la-la, eh?

Neil and Diana were both born in nearby Doncaster

so this is a bit of a local derby.

Whoo-hoo! Bye-bye!

-I just love antiques.

-What's your taste?

-Well, you'll find out.

-I'm sure I will. But you're not going to be shy, are you?

-No.

Follow your instinct, your taste, we're in there.

Dame Diana, shy? Somehow I don't think so.

Their first shop takes them to the town of Rotherham,

to Harrisons Antiques.

-So, here we go, Diana.

-Looks really exciting.

-It's a huge, by the looks of things.

-Huge!

-SCOTTISH ACCENT:

-Huge!

HE LAUGHS

Right, then, your destiny awaits.

I think it's Christine who actually awaits, and her vast

array of stock will surely satisfy Diana's thirst for antiques.

-I'm Paul.

-Are you the queen of all we survey?

-I'd like to be.

A dame and a queen, eh? You're a lucky boy, Paul.

-OK, can we have a quick look around?

-You certainly can, yes.

-Thanks a lot.

-Browse at your leisure.

-And holler when we find something, yeah?

-Hopefully.

-There's plenty to go at for you.

-Tremendous.

-Okey-cokey. Let's go-key.

With so much to choose from, where to start?

Stand-by - Diana's gone straight for the kill.

-Oh, look, can I see the lady playing on the violin?

-That one.

-Does he work?

-I believe it does.

Schuco piece. German affair.

There he goes.

Slightly scary, really, don't you think?

It's the stuff that nightmares are made of.

Schuco, mid-20th century? Is that reasonable?

You're so clever. I would never have known that.

Have you got a price tag on that?

Right. You're looking on...

You're looking at £45.

My instinct tells me, if we can get it for less...

-What sort of price are you...?

-I was thinking...

Steady, steady. Can we do this in a double act?

Let me introduce ourselves. We are hard-bitten, hard-faced trade buyers.

-He's the hard sell, I'm the soft sell.

-Good cop, bad cop.

OK, I'm happy to be the bad cop.

-Can you be as gentle on us as possible?

-Good cop, bad cop.

-£30?

-That's the number.

-25?

-Oh, my word. Now you're bad cop.

-25.

-Role reversal.

25. You look 25.

-You sold me.

-DIANA CHEERS

Look at that!

I am really grateful because I think he's absolutely charming.

Isn't that heavenly?

A bold start for our dame.

The first item of the trip for £25.

Looks like Paul's going to have his hands full here.

Meanwhile, Neil and Catherine are getting acquainted.

-Tell me about you, Neil. Antiques.

-Yes.

-What do you know?

-I know virtually nothing about antiques.

-Well, that's a great start.

It's going to be a huge, great voyage of discovery for me.

-Well, we're on a mission.

-Yes.

-We've got to find some good, good, eye-catching objects.

-OK.

And, if all else fails, we'll sell the hat.

I don't think Diana's going to be very pleased about that.

I'm not sure she would either, Neil.

Neil and Catherine's first foray takes them to the town of Barnsley,

to Cawthorne Antiques.

Whoo-hoo, this is us.

SHE CHUCKLES

I'm going to leave Diana's hat here.

I hope it doesn't get stolen.

It had better not. Upsetting a dame is never a good idea.

-Ready for this?

-I'm ready.

-I'm ready. Let's go.

-OK.

-Show me the way.

-Hello.

-Hello.

-First tip.

-Yes.

-Make friends with...

-Hello, Karen.

-..the boss.

-How are you?

How lovely to see you. Are you having a nice day?

Can I get you a tea or anything? Am I overdoing it?

-No, you're doing brilliantly!

-And Holly, hello.

I'm looking for...

some antiques.

I don't know whether you've got anything... Oh, look!

He's very quick to catch on.

-How long have we got?

-About half an hour.

-OK.

Let's buy that clock and go to the pub, come on.

Mmm, perhaps I spoke too soon.

I'm just looking for something that makes me go,

-"Oh, that's rather nice."

-Yeah.

-And then you say, "That's horrible."

Might this little elephant be to Neil's taste?

-It's 75 quid!

-I know but that's not bad.

It's a Vesta case, a small, portable box used to keep matches dry.

Named after the Roman goddess of fire and the hearth,

they were very popular in the late 19th and early 20th centuries.

-It's tiny.

-The matches then, in those days, in the olden days...

The people were much smaller. And they only smoked little cigarettes.

-Exactly! But that's quite unusual, isn't it?

-Now, Karen,

I want you to be honest about this.

Originally, would this have had eyes and tusks?

I'm sure it would have, yes.

The eyes would have been little glass eyes, probably,

and we would have had little ivory tusks.

But it's unusual. It's quite nicely modelled, though, isn't it?

I think they're considering it.

-Shall we...?

-Mm...

I don't want to rush into anything.

Self-doubt creeping in there, Neil.

Go on, trust your instincts for once.

We would be interested. Our problem is that there's tusks missing.

The glass eyes are missing.

Can we find out what's the very, very best price?

-That would be lovely. Yeah?

-Yeah, well, if you can talk about prices.

-I'm quite interested in...

-He's just so blase about the whole thing.

No, I... Well, you're used to this, you see. I don't get out much.

As Neil takes the more relaxed approach,

back in Rotherham, Diana's full steam ahead.

I suspect this isn't going to be a problem, do you?

First stall we went to, first cabinet - "Oh, I love that."

And then straight in.

Decisive. She lived up to her promise.

She said, "I don't know what I'm going to buy but I will know it

"when I see it. I will run with my instinct."

She's got some instinct thus far! And she delivers.

Fantastic!

Now, what's she on to here?

I love glitz.

And...nowadays vintage costume - oh, pretty -

does frightfully well.

Still on a jewellery mission.

-You're not to keen on this but you're a fella.

-What do I know?

But Diana has her heart set on some sort of sparkle, Paul,

unsurprisingly, it's not long before she finds

a collection of costume jewellery.

Oh, yes, there's something.

-This is extremely...

-Volume speaks to me.

Because you're probably a greedy man. Are you a greedy man?

I think the girth tells us a lot about that.

-What I'll do, everything on there...

-Everything here?

-Everything on there.

-For how much?

All chips in. No coming back to me and saying...

No, we wouldn't do that.

-Much cheapness here.

-£15.

-Perfect!

-It's a deal.

I'm going to shake your hand this time.

You're something else, are you not?

Not just a pretty face.

As Diana continues at a rate of knots, Neil and Catherine

continue to deliberate over the elephant Vesta case.

They're really thinking this one through.

Are we thinking a reasonable price is...

-in the sort of...30s.

-30s.

Is that the start?

It is a low start but if we started at, say, 30 and then I said,

"All right, 35" then that would be...

I think that would be tops.

What about 45?

All right, 40.

39 - 40! Oh, I could have got 39!

-40? Brilliant.

-£40.

All right, go on, we'll have that.

£40 of the realm.

Neil and Catherine are finally off the mark with the elephant

Vesta case for £40.

But they're not done here yet.

It's a pig. But it looks to me like the pig is wearing a bowler hat.

He's holding something and then we've got smoke

-coming out of there but what is that?

-Is it a pipe?

I don't think it's a pipe or anything.

Looks like it's got an umbrella in the other hand.

Oh, he's a city gent. He's a pig with his nose in the trough.

-How much do you want for that?

-Don't!

-What?

-Give you 25 quid for it. What?

-Don't get too excited.

I'm not excited, you're the one jumping up and down

telling me not to get excited.

No, but we've got... We're, you know...

Yeah, we don't like it, we don't like it.

Neil's keen but what about expert Catherine?

-I mean, it's quite rough.

-It is.

We'd like to pay about £10 for it.

HE SCOFFS

Sorry, I'm on your side! Yeah, £10. Way over the top!

Because of the state it's in, yeah, I'm not going to argue with that.

£10. Done. Thank you very much.

A deal at £10 for the butcher's shop pig sign.

Catherine's managing to keep her celebrity under control,

but what about Paul?

I'm here on my own.

Obviously not.

She's away buying something.

I'll get there and she'll say, "I've got the ten lots."

Heel!

Yes, Boss.

Ah, there she is.

What have you done?

He's obedient.

This gentleman, who is the husband of this lovely lady,

has...something that I...

Have a look at it.

-OK, is it the whistle with the compass?

-It's the whistle.

An original one there.

How interesting. Girl Guide piece. OK, I get it.

It's uncommon, it's quirky, but it's not substantial in quality.

Do we know the price? Have you bought this?

Not yet. But she likes it.

And I guess she normally gets her way, don't you?

-What are we asking?

-£20.

I think people would go for that, if you could just lower it a tiny bit.

What do you think?

-I'd say...

-I'm a very poor man, so...

-Half it.

-Half.

-£10.

-Perfect.

-Yes.

-Thank you.

-It's a bargain.

-Really, really kind. Both of you.

You're a kind couple.

-A good couple.

-That's why we're poor.

You look shell-shocked. Welcome to my world.

THEY LAUGH

Shell-shocked but three items purchased for a total of £50.

£25 for the Schuco clown toy,

£15 for the generous bunch of costume jewellery,

and £10 for the Girl Guide whistle and compass.

With Diana and Paul's shop done and dusted in next to no time...

Takes me a bit of time to get in.

..Neil and Catherine's more considered approach to

antiques purchasing continues.

-You could use the chimney pots. Do you not like those?

-Yeah, I do.

I like them and I'm sure somebody else would like them.

I think if you saw two of those together you might think you want

to buy those and have them in your back garden or something.

You know, they'd be a pair. You have them priced here at £28 each.

But if we were to say...

£20 the pair, you might say...?

Go on, then. You've twisted my arm.

Bit more decisive there. Neil's warming up nicely.

Thank you very much.

Anything else out here?

What do we like about it?

-The sheer tactility of it.

-How old is this, though?

This is what worries me.

It's been made more recently.

You'd feel better about buying it and selling it

if you thought this is from some lovely old moorland farm

that we cleared and it's 200 years old.

But we've got a pretty strong sense that it's not.

You can't say that Neil's not giving this all proper thought.

Well...if in doubt, leave it out.

-Yeah?

-Or...

It seems as though they sell.

One for later perhaps? A successful bit of shopping, though.

They bough the brass elephant Vesta case for £40,

the iron pig butcher's shop sign for £10,

and the pair of chimney pots for £20.

And the trough is still under consideration.

-That was marvellous.

-Pretty nice place. Lots of nice stuff.

-Three items.

-Three.

Dame Diana's one of Yorkshire's most celebrated former residents and is

en route to the town of Wakefield to find out all about another.

Barbara Hepworth was one of the greatest artists

and sculptors of the 20th century.

Born here in 1903, she went from modest beginnings to achieve

international acclaim for her work.

And our duo's next stop is the Hepworth Wakefield Gallery

to find out more about the artist's extraordinary life.

-Hi, there.

-Hello.

-Nice to meet you.

-And to meet you.

-Hi, is it Frances?

-That's right.

-Pleased to meet you.

-And to meet you.

-This is some structure, is it not?

Fantastic building. This is the Hepworth Wakefield.

Welcome to Wakefield, and to Hepworth's birthplace.

-Terrif! Let's go.

-OK.

THEY LAUGH

Hepworth is best known for her iconic sculptures, becoming one of

only a handful of internationally famous female artists.

But she also produced outstanding paintings and sketches,

which now form part of the gallery's unique collection.

She went to school in Wakefield. She went to Wakefield Girls High School.

And she was really encouraged to pursue her artistic

and her creative side. And she won a scholarship

to go and pursue her studies at Leeds College of Art.

But she went to Leeds and she met Henry Moore there.

Who, although Henry Moore is five years older,

he was also born in Wakefield,

and he was studying at the same time. And together they had

this real artistic inclination towards sculpture.

And in the end they ended up going to the Royal College of Art

together in London to study sculpture.

One of the most famous and notable British artists of the 20th century,

Henry Moore and Barbara were friends,

taking trips to Paris together.

In her 20s, Barbara continued to travel and study in Europe,

exhibiting work with, and later marrying,

fellow artist John Skeaping.

Her second marriage to artist to Ben Nicholson

resulted in the birth of triplets.

The family settled in St Ives in Cornwall and the events

around this time in Barbara's life had a profound effect on her work.

One of the triplets, during the Second World War, was very ill.

She was treated by a surgeon called Norman Capener.

He extended an invitation to Hepworth

to go to the operating theatres and make drawings,

and she found it really stimulating

because she saw this real correspondence between her work

as a sculptor and the work of the surgeons.

-It's absolutely ravishing.

-Beautiful drawings.

-So personal as well.

-Yes.

Whilst her prodigious talent was formed in her native Yorkshire,

her close connection with Cornwall, where she continued to hone

her skills as a world-renowned sculptor,

continued for the rest of her life.

What was she like as a person? What was her nature?

I think she was very focused, very ambitious.

But she had a family

and she managed to combine both that role as a mother with her ambition

and obviously working on commissions that were hugely important.

I think she was a humanist at heart.

She really believed in the kind of ideals of, say, the United Nations.

So, it's all about the commonality of human kind and doing good

and the kind of sense of a common purpose.

This affinity with humanity greatly inspired her work and led to

a commission to create her most iconic and famous sculpture,

Single Form, which stands proudly

outside the United Nations building in New York.

In this photograph you can clearly see the origins

of this enormous sculpture and there she is,

diminutive Barbara Hepworth in her boiler suit and head scarf.

Lovely to see this womanly figure against something enormous.

Absolutely. It's quite inspirational, isn't it?

Enormous belief in herself, which is great.

Hepworth continued to work prolifically in Cornwall

until her death in 1975,

and she leaves behind a truly amazing legacy.

Wonderful. I hope she knows her work resonates everywhere.

Back on the road, Neil and Catherine are heading west to the market town

of Penistone, to J&B Antiques.

Ooh, got a bit of class here.

-John.

-John.

-Hello, John.

-Neil.

What are we looking for now, do you think? Cos we've gone...

three sort of unusual, quirky, bit different.

Do we want to stick on the quirky theme or go for something

a little bit more...

-Say, more traditional things.

-Something like that or...

Do we want to carry on with the way we're going?

Cos we're doing pretty well.

The quirky thing's quite interesting, isn't it?

With an elephant and a pig already in their possession,

might there be room for one more bit of wildlife

to complete the hat-trick?

I love the badger. Think he's amazing. How much is the badger?

-245.

-245?

-Yeah.

-That was the first thing I saw.

-Budget gone on a badger, isn't it?

-How old is it?

-It's dead.

Well spotted, Neil(!)

Preserving animals, or taxidermy, goes back centuries.

Explorers such as James Cook and Charles Darwin also used it

as a method of preserving newly-discovered species.

But it's not everybody's cup of tea.

Or badger, for that matter.

I think he's brilliant.

I don't think I could bring myself to buy one of these, though.

What do you think?

And it's a heck of a lot of money in one go.

We haven't got that much left in the budget.

I can't even touch it, actually.

So, despite the undoubted admiration for the badger,

he's left on the shelf.

Neil looks like he's got his eye on a bit of retro.

-Do people collect tie clips?

-Do you wear a tie clip?

I don't... I haven't got a tie clip.

It's more of a '70s, '80s thing, isn't it?

It's ripe for coming back, then. You've got to be ahead of the curve.

That's one way of putting it. But I'm not sure Catherine's on board.

Men of England, are you with me?

-The tie clip is coming back.

-I'm not sure they are.

-Do you want it?

-There's two.

This is a slightly bygone era, isn't it, of people buying...

Bygone era? It's antiques, it's all a bygone era by definition.

I mean people wearing...

would somebody go to an auction

and get as excited as you about two tie clips?

I was thinking about buying this for myself, to be honest.

So, obviously I'd get quite excited. When we turn up at this thing...

-They'd make very nice hairclips.

-Do you think? Is it me?

-Yes.

Erm...if we turn up

and there's a job lot of tie clips going for a fortune...

you'll be cursing. Can I take that, please, for my own personal use?

Come on, Neil, this isn't a personal shopping trip.

At least he's gone with his expert's advice and will be wearing

the tie clips himself, rather than selling them at auction.

-Ben, thank you very much for showing us your lovely wares.

-Thank you.

Lovely tie clips. Watch out for them. Get more of them.

-Honestly, they're going to be big.

-He'll be back.

I'm just off to put a tie on, actually.

I might wear both of them at the same time.

That could be it - multiple tie clips.

With nothing leaping out at them, I'd say our antique-acquiring

adventurers have earned a well-deserved rest. So, night-night.

It's the start of day two

and Neil has taken on the familiar role of chauffeur to Dame Diana.

I feel like Toad driving his car going, "Whoop-whoop."

Did you have a nice day yesterday?

I had a lovely day. I absolutely adore it, it's my idea of heaven.

Really nice having somebody like Paul there to explain stuff to you.

Yes. GEARS GRIND

Mind how you go there, Neil.

I wonder if Paul agrees with Diana's version of yesterday's events?

-How did you get on?

-Um...

Um...

SHE LAUGHS

-I felt like a bit of a passenger yesterday.

-Did you?

Look, Diana, you talk about getting in there, like a Terminator.

Oh, Lordy.

Yesterday Diana did keep Paul on his toes,

picking up the Schuco clown toy for £25,

the costume jewellery for £15,

and the girl guide whistle and compass for £10.

You look shell-shocked.

Spending a total of 50, they still have £350 left.

I don't want to rush into anything.

Catherine and Neil's more equal partnership brought out

the antiques enthusiast in Mr Dudgeon...

I was thinking about just buying this for myself, to be honest.

I was totally amazed at how Neil was.

-He really got into the whole thing.

-Excellent.

We are going to find him at antiques shops

and antique markets for ever more.

Neil and Catherine bought the brass elephant Vesta case for £40,

the iron pig shop sign for £10,

and the two square stone chimney pots for £20.

They're also considering a pine salt trough.

But that's on the back burner for now.

Overall, they've spent £70, leaving them with £330 still to play with.

Our refreshed celebrities and experts are reconvening

in the town of Ossett, just outside Wakefield.

The meeting place is Spa Farm Antiques,

which is also Diana and Paul's first shop.

Good morning, hello.

And our demanding Dame is keen to get shopping.

WHISTLE BLOWS

Seems like she's found a practical use for that whistle.

-Don't you get one of those.

-That's not a bad idea, is it?

Chop, chop, Paul. Best not keep her waiting.

-Hello.

-Hello, lovely to meet you. I'm Diana. This is Paul.

-Hi.

-Hello, Paul, lovely to meet you.

Can we...

-have a look round?

-Please do.

-Thanks.

I like what they've done.

You wish to discuss tactics.

I do cos we've got good tidgy things

and we need one zonking great thing

-which is going to make a zonking great profit.

-OK.

And I kind of...

I'm good at the tidgies and you're good at the zonking.

-Tidgies and zonking?

-Yeah.

-Between us we've got the tidgies and zonking covered.

-Perfect.

So that's settled - Diana's looking after the tidgies

and Paul's in charge of the zonking.

-It's only six quid.

-What have you got there?

That'll be a tidgy, then.

Little golfer's hip flask and scorecard.

I don't think it's an auctionable lot because of its youth.

Give it another 60 years, it's a collector's item. Right now,

i'ts...

I don't know, it's not me.

-It's not you but it's me.

-Golfers abound.

-Yeah, exactly.

And they've generally got a budget.

They generally need something along the line when they just,

you know, lobbed it into the water.

HE LAUGHS

They might need a gulp of something!

Paul's not keen on the hip flask, but Diana's tactics are consistent -

ignore your expert and carry on regardless.

But is there a deal to be done?

What can you do?

OK, I'll just speak to the lady who that belongs to and I'll be back.

OK, thanks so much.

Well, it doesn't take Judith long to come back with an answer.

-The good news is...

-£4.

-Perfect!

Wonderful woman, thank you.

-Was that a purchase?

-Yup.

-One down.

Ah, yes, that was a purchase, Paul, despite your reluctance.

At least it was only £4.

Neil and Catherine are on their way to the Yorkshire market town

of Otley and they're in a bullish mood.

I think we've got it in the bag. We've already won.

Well, I wouldn't go that far.

That Dame Diana Rigg knows a thing or two.

I get the impression that Diana was leading it, totally,

and Paul was the chauffeur.

-I've been there. It's s good role but you need to know your place.

-Yeah.

-And I think he knew his place yesterday.

-Yeah.

-Whereas, I think we were partners in crime.

-Oh, I think so.

They're heading to Rummage,

owned by husband and wife team Denise and Dave.

-Well, Rummage. Are you ready for a rummage?

-I like a rummage.

Come on, then, let's go and have a rummage.

Good morning. Catherine. Hello, hi.

It's not long before Neil's making a beeline for an old favourite.

-Are these tie clips?

-Yes, it's a tie clip and...

-Oh, don't get him started.

-There's a theme developing.

I think Neil needs to move on from his tie clip obsession

and concentrate on the competition.

What I've got here is a...

Oh, yeah, any thoughts?

I've no idea what it is. It's some sort of... It's for displaying...

Or it could be... Is it...? No.

Would it originally have been a printer's thing?

Do printers use these and keep their letters in them?

I'd say you might possibly be right.

Catherine, my expert friend, are you busy?

-Oh, I saw that outside.

-Isn't this a printer's...?

-You put your letters in here.

-yeah, could be.

This is for really big letters, obviously.

-Have you got any thimbles?

-I have.

OK, we buy some thimbles, put them in here,

say it's a bespoke thimble collection.

SHE LAUGHS Your tie clips will go in here.

Yeah, but nobody wants thimbles now. What could you use it for now?

Think about what we could use it for now.

Tiny little shot glasses. Buttons.

-Don't mind doing a deal. Can't pay the bills with stock.

-No.

But would you mind a very low offer?

-Very low.

-Ooh, what are we thinking of?

To be perfectly honest with you, I'd offer £5.

-I need to make a profit.

-Yes.

And your offering me what I've paid.

-Not five?

-No, I would have started at ten.

-Done!

-Hello! She's quick, isn't she?

I think she likes that.

-She's doubled...

-I seem to have made an offer.

She's doubled her money. You did that without blinking.

Looks like Neil's just getting started in here.

The top people have one of these.

Very professional-looking, Neil.

There's an antiques expert hiding in there somewhere.

I'll make you an offer for that little whatever-it-is boat.

It's too small to be a gravy boat.

-It's like a mint sauce boat.

-It could be, yeah.

I think it's quite a nice little thing, it's a nice weight

and a nice pourer. It's got a lovely shape.

-Quality.

-It says quality to me. And for that reason...

I'd like to slip you a fiver for it.

For me, £5 would be a very good deal.

There you are. Thank you very much. That's a lovely piece.

-There's your...and there's my...

-I'll get you some change.

-Thank you.

Bold move, Neil. He's bought the sauce boat for £5

to add to his vintage printer's drawer for £10.

While Neil's been flying solo,

his expert is getting on the phone

and is trying to negotiate a deal on the salt trough they saw yesterday.

Now, remind me again on the price?

35. Right, OK.

Do you think you'd do it for a cheeky 30?

That would be really, really kind. Thank you very much.

-£35.

-OK.

-30.

-30 - you got it for 30?

-£30.

You rang Carolyn and knocked her down?

Well, no, she was more than happy.

She was delighted.

How many objects have we got? Six.

Three, four, five, six...

Six lovely things for £115.

I can't wait t see what they got.

Come to Yorkshire, where your money goes further.

-Thank you.

-It's been great fun. Thank you. Bye-bye!

With Neil and Catherine's shopping now complete...

I love that!

..back in Ossett,

Paul is still trying to keep up with his dame.

This is what I'm looking for.

It's the Anglo-Indian thing, isn't it?

-I tell you what - to put me jewels in.

-Indeed.

They'll fall out. But that's the way they...

-It's a tea chest we need.

-Yes.

-Not a trinket box.

No, no, they'll fall out, but in the way it should happen.

-Yeah.

-Do you see what I mean?

-I hear what you are saying.

I think it's looking pretty.

-I think another decision's been made, hasn't it, Diana?

-Yeah, it has.

THEY LAUGH

-Diana... I trust you.

-Goody-good.

I defer to you!

Shall I do the carrying?

(Best idea yet.)

The ticket price is £8,

but Judith is off to see if a better deal can be agreed.

Would £4 be all right for you?

That would be perfect. Thank you so much!

-You are very welcome.

-Wonderful.

Diana's charm has done the trick.

Another great discount.

To get the trinket box for £4.

DOG WHISTLE

Oh, that blasted whistle's back. Poor old, Paul.

-Heel.

-Woof(!)

Diana, I feel like Pavlov's dog.

Every time you blow the whistle, I sweat. Rather than salivate.

THEY LAUGH

Show me, show me, your...your...

-First reaction.

-I saw that. I saw it.

-Yes! And you liked?

Yes, I did.

Tell me why you like it. You sell this to ME.

I like it because of the wood.

I like it because the hinges are of the period.

-I like it because it's capacious.

-Mm-hmm.

That is...18th century timber,

it's been loved,

waxed once a year

dusted thereafter.

It's got a lovely honest, untouched patina.

-And an elegantly simple object.

-Yeah.

But it is a proper antique!

Remind me the price. Is it 120?

I'm going to leave you to buy it. I've done most of the buying.

-OK.

-Your turn.

-However, I've got a bigger task ahead of me than you.

-Why's that?

-Because I've got to get that down by 50%.

Well, it's a big deal. Go, go, go.

The pressure's on to prove yourself, Paul.

The clerk's desk has a ticket price of £120,

but Paul's hoping to negotiate a deal for 60.

Judith's back on that phone to see if the owner will do business.

Here she comes.

-You could do that?

-Valerie's just said that.

-Which is really kind of her.

-Really kind of her!

-We want you to succeed.

-Oh, how nice!

I have got to shake your hand.

And it's pleasure to shake yours.

Wonderful! Thank you very much.

We have got to be happy now, Diana.

I'm thrilled.

That is a relief... and a very generous discount.

The clerk's desk for £60, which along with the trinket box

and golfer's hip flask for £4 each, is a grand total of £68,

leaving them with £282 still to play with.

Back in the spider, Neil and Catherine are en route

to one of Yorkshire's most architecturally stunning landmarks.

Situated between Harrogate and Leeds,

Harewood House is a stately home

which was the location for the Grand Depart

of the 2014 Tour de France.

The house was built by the Lascelles family in the 18th century.

They were local landowners

who made their fortune in West Indian plantations.

Keen to demonstrate that status of the family,

the house was built, finished and landscaped

by the very best craftsmen of the day.

The family have long been patrons of the arts,

and over the generations

have amassed a stunning collection of treasures.

-The Lascelles bought Harewood in 1730...?

-38.

1738. They bought the land...

-They bought the land.

-There wasn't a house here, at all, then?

-No, no.

They built this house.

They wanted the very best.

They bought a huge estate

and this was the one that they put all their focus in.

New house, new interiors -

the very best of everything of the day.

And I think that tradition just continued.

Harewood is just known for having the very best collections.

The house was built under the supervision of Edwin Lascelles.

Work started in 1759 taking 12 years to build.

With expansions and additions continuing

well into the 19th century.

Only the best was good enough for Harewood House

and Edwin made sure that from inside to out

it was created to the highest standards.

He was also a great lover of art,

and he started the outstanding collection of masterpieces

that adorn the walls of the house.

So into the gallery,

which is a pretty impressive room.

The house is very much as it originally was,

so this is the original scheme for this room.

What was this room used for originally?

-It was always a gallery.

-To sit and admire your pictures?

Well, yes. And the ladies could promenade.

Or they could be entertained in here.

So it was used for social gatherings.

Don't say I don't take you to the best places.

You do! You put on a good spread!

When Edwin died in 1795,

the house passed down to his cousin Edward,

who continued the tradition of filling the place

with the finest artwork of the day.

He was buying and acquiring an awful lot of very fine pieces,

but he's also got a bank balance to support it,

so he's a really fashionable young Regency dandy,

in a very fashionable set which is being led by the Prince Regent -

later George IV -

Edwin Lascelles was moving in the highest of circles,

and started to model himself on the Prince Regent -

even adopting his look.

However this copycat behaviour did not sit well with the future king -

a contemporary society diary entry notes that

the Prince viewed him as a pretender! Hah!

There's a lovely bit where it actually says

on January 25, 1796,

where the young Mr Lascelles of Harewood House

is reckoned very much like the Prince of Wales.

The Prince is not pleased, at all.

He calls Lascelles "the pretender",

making a remark on a portrait painted by Hoppner

he desires an alteration, so...

And there's these references later on in the diary -

it he goes on to say there was a party at Brighton Pavilion -

the wonderful extravagant home of the Prince Regent -

about how he was actually struck on the shoulder -

the Prince of Wales was mistaken for Lascelles -

and he wasn't very impressed, at all.

He was the future king of England,

he didn't want to be mistaken for this...

for this...young chap.

Edwin's patronage of artists was a great help

to some notable painters of the age,

and in particular watercolourist Turner,

who was a frequent visitor to Harewood to paint pictures

of the house and surrounding countryside.

So there's a few small pieces here.

These are his cheque-books.

They're really lovely because they say -

this is in his hand -

"April 8, 1806, £63 to Mr Turner."

One of the paintings he was paid for.

We know they came to Harewood in the late 1790s

and continued to come right the way through.

They continued this friendship,

and he was buying and acquiring pieces from a number of artists.

Here in his account books you can see he was paying Wedgwood...

-What a super record!

-Absolutely.

So lovely to have. Just... Oh!

And to have so many pieces from his original -

or from THEIR original visit, and their friendship, as well.

-I think that's really wonderful.

-It's great. Fabulous.

-Fantastic.

Thank you very much. It's been lovely to meet you.

-Thank you for having us here.

-Come again some time!

-Thank you.

-Fascinating.

-Thank you very much.

Back on the open road with Diana and Paul.

Your gear changes are considerably smoother, I may say,

then the adorable Mr Dudgeon's.

Don't say that, you'll jinx me!

They're travelling to the village of Gomersal.

They have a healthy £282 to spend,

but will anything catch their eye in the Old Silk Mill?

I love dogs.

You love dog... Do you love this dog?

-You know what, it's a...

-Knee jerk reaction?

-I...

I'd say it's a setter, wouldn't you?

Because of that fluffy tail.

Yeah, yeah.....

-Now, you know the name of what this is?

-Tunbridge ware.

Why? Because they made a lot of it in Tunbridge?

Indeed. The body is actually rosewood.

They were sold as novelty objects,

and it's a wee souvenir trinket box.

And - at circa 1860 - it's 150-year-old.

That's really amazing, isn't it?

Perfect condition.

-And the work in that!

-It defies belief.

-It really does.

Because that tiny pieces, aren't they?

It brings in another field of interest into this lot.

We could get a Tunbridge collector

alight on this little lot of costume jewellery -

"Ah, costume schmostume... Who knows! ..but I like the box!"

-Goody good. You're... Absolutely.

-Yeah.

-Clever man!

-But there's another problem.

-What's that?

Don't know how much that is.

I think if we can get that for... £10 or £14 -

not a lot of money -

it's got legs.

Time to beckon owner - Tony.

Tony? Come-hither.

You're all right. She whistles at me!

You got the polite "Tony, come-hither."

DIANA LAUGHS

No price on box.

It's £12, that.

Sounds all right to me. However...

Of course, we're going to ask!

Yeah. Ask.

Toooony...?

For you, Diana...

Erm...

Look into the eyes. Not around the eyes, into the eyes.

What if I said...

Well, eight.

-DIANA GASPS

-Oh, perfect...!

-Would that be OK?

-Tony, your fantastic!

-Thank you.

-Thanks. A lot!

Ta-dun dah!

We're done. We're done.

Done indeed. With no messing about as usual,

Diana and Paul walk away with the Tunbridge trinket box for £8. Gosh.

-Off we go.

-Off we go.

-Follow.

With the shopping complete, Diana and Paul head to Harewood House

to meet up with Neil and Catherine for the big reveal.

It's terribly exciting. NEIL GASPS

Have a close look.

For any housewife

who wants to get rid of her husband for a good four hours,

a golf scoring pad.

And if he wants... You know, when he's lobbed it into the nearest lake

he can take a swig of something. Isn't that divine?

-A hip flask and score keeper.

-Yeah.

For a golfer. Have you ever seen that before?

-I never have.

-No.

-Do you play golf?

-I've led a very sheltered life.

-Do you play golf?

-I wouldn't say I played, no.

-But have you ever seen that before?

-No.

And you've got a whistle on the end.

Yes, but you have you seen the glory of the whistle?

-It's got a compass.

-Yes.

And it's a Girl Guide whistle.

Have you seen that before?

That's quite interesting.

-"Quite"?

-Sorry, VERY.

Really, really interesting.

Were you a Girl Guide yourself?

No, I was a Brownie sixer.

Certainly was.

Time to examine Neil and Catherine's wares.

So, boat...

Silver plate boat.

It has the letters PRHA on the side.

Pretty Hopeless and Risky Acquisition.

-Ooh, very good.

-That's the one!

Forgive me,

I couldn't help it, gratuitous though it was.

Oh, no - don't take any notice.

Mm. What about the butcher's sign?

Got to see it to believe it, frankly.

We're very pleased with it. A very intriguing piece.

Do you know, I'm gobsmacked. What is it?

Well, clearly it's a pig -

it's a pork butcher's shop sign.

It's showing a pig

with an umbrella and a bowler hat smoking a cigar, clearly.

I don't get it at all.

I think it's a GCSE metalwork fail.

-No...

-I'm being cruel!

Whose heart did that one quicken?

-We both liked that, actually.

-Really?

-Yes.

Oh, darlings,

where were you at when you got that? I mean, really!

It's a one-off.

Yup, you're right.

Nobody will make two of those, that's sure.

What on earth will they say in private?

Are you content? Do you think we're contenders?

Well, I think the worst thing that we can do is be complacent.

-Do you know what I mean?

-OK.

-So I think we go hoping.

And praying.

And let's do our best.

We've bought interesting, quirky things that are a little bit out there.

I'm really believing in my jewellery.

-We stand by our objects, don't we?

-Yes. Yes.

-I believe in everything we've done.

-Good.

-We're contenders.

-That's the main thing.

-You're the pro, and you believe in it. Da-daa!

-Let's go.

Time to leave God's own country in Yorkshire,

and head down to Stansted in Essex

for that local all-important auction.

So, are our experts feeling confident?

So, come on then, Paul... It's D-Day.

It's Diana Day, that's what it is!

Don't up the ante any more than it already is.

-Oh, my...

-When I saw your face when we revealed the items -

your items -

-you weren't pleased, come on.

-Well, seriously...! How much can I say?

Sometimes it's best to say nothing, Paul.

And auctions are unpredictable, so it's anyone's guess.

Sworders Fine Art Auctioneers were established in 1782,

and we have auctioneer Helen Jonas to give us

her verdict on what our team's offerings are like.

It's quite an interesting mix. Quite fun, quirky things.

Also a few things that might struggle a bit, but we'll see how they'll do today.

I quite like the Schuco monkey with the violin. That's quite a fun lot,

I think that's the best of the bunch, really.

I'm less sure about the silver-plated sauce boat on its own,

but we'll see how the day progresses.

Both teams started with £400 each.

Neil and Catherine spent £115 on six items in total

organised into six auction lots.

Diana and Paul have ended up with five lots,

after spending £126 on this group of goodies.

Take your seats,

eyes forward and pay attention. The auction's about to begin.

Best of luck, everyone!

-I think it's looking positive.

-The moment of truth.

First up, it's the silver-plated sauce boat that Neil bought

when Catherine wasn't supervising.

-£20, anywhere?

-What did you pay?

10 to start me. Anyone tempted?

£5 to start me. A sauce boat there for £5, anyone interested?

No interest in that one. So we'll have to carry on.

Neil liked it, but sadly no-one else did! Not the strongest start.

-Oh, the shame!

-I didn't even see it.

-I told you about it.

-You've got to have it.

Diana purchased her golfer's hip flask, against expert advice,

but will it defy the doubters?

I think it's a thing of beauty and wonder.

And I'm sure it'll go for an absolute fortune

if the good people have any taste and discernment.

-£5 to start me.

-Yes!

Ooh, I'm not sure you're meant to be bidding, I'm afraid.

Any interest at £5?

No? I'm afraid we're going to have to leave that one.

Another one left on the shelf! But still time to pull in a profit.

0-0. Well, that even things up.

Next, it's Neil and Catherine's pair of chimney pots.

I'm bid £10 at the back, any interest at £12?

£10, then, opening bid, any further interest?

I'll sell for £10...

Surely that's £40, £50. Surely.

I'm afraid not, Catherine. It's only £10, and a loss.

Well, that's a swizz, isn't it?

It's a swizz.

It's an outrage, Neil, it's an outrage.

Next, we have Diana and Paul's combined lot

of the costume jewellery, trinket box and Tunbridge casket.

-Every reason to be confident.

-OK, this is it.

£30, anywhere...?

£20 to start me.

20 I'm bid, 22 standing.

25, 28,

30, 32, 35,

38? It's 35...

Well done! That's a profit anyway at least.

35 by the tables then...

-It's a bidding war!

-Well done.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Hurrah! A profit at last.

I have to say, whoever bought that for 35,

there were about 12 pairs of earrings in the Tunbridge box,

and all those necklaces in the other box.

It's nothing, though, is it, really? It's nothing.

-It's a profit!

-It's a profit.

Neil's vintage printer's drawer is up next.

Good way to display the collectables. £10 anywhere?

-(What did it cost?)

-(10.)

£10 in the centre, any further interest?

I'll sell to the lady in the centre

with no number at £10...

Got it away.

It could have been worse. I would take that. I would take that.

After commission, that will be a small loss.

-CATHERINE:

-What do you think?

-Erm...

-Happy?

-I'm pleased that somebody else likes it,

I think somebody's got a bargain.

Hopefully they'll do something interesting with it.

Diana's Schuco clown toy is next.

It was first thing she saw, and the first thing she bought.

But how will it do?

Our favey.

-Favey-davey.

-Now, I think this is

-our joint best yet.

-Yeah.

It hangs on this.

22 and you're in the room. 22, 25, 28, commissions are out.

Is that 30 there, lady's bid?

-Otherwise it's 28 in front of the rostrum...

-Going to wash its face.

32, 35, 38.

40...

No, 38 then, still near the rostrum at 38.

Any further interest? I'll sell...

Near the rostrum at £38...

Another profit - and things are looking up.

-DIANA:

-That person's got a bargain.

-So come on, Diana - you have done pretty well.

-We are doing all right.

You've got a profit on your jewellery...

Well, I'm not a greedy person, but I think it's worth more.

Do you know what I mean?

-I think we should be happy.

-I'm happy.

A profit is a profit, Dame Diana, and you're in the lead.

Next up is Neil and Catherine's pig butcher's shop sign.

Your pig is going to save the day.

Yeah. The pig could save your bacon.

-Do you like that?

-Right, here we go. This is it. Come on.

The pig sign, then, at £30 with commission. 35 anywhere in the room?

It's £30 then - any further interest? 35 there, 40. 45, sir.

The flying pig!

45, 50. 55, sir? No, it's with me then,

back with commission at 50. any further interest?

I'll sell to commission at £50...

-PAUL:

-Well done!

Who has paid £50 for that pig?!

How do you feel about auctions now(?)

With that great profit, Neil and Catherine are back in business.

There's no accounting for taste!

Next we have Diana's command tool for Paul -

the Girl Guide whistle and compass.

I want somebody to wet my whistle!

£30 to start me, anywhere?

20 to start me? The Girl Guides whistle.

£10...?

God, they're not whistley people.

£12?

-It's £10 in the centre, any further interest?

-What did we pay?

-10.

For the opening bid of £10... And that's 207.

-Well, it could have been.

-Well, you got it.

Ten quid is cheap.

Silver. And a compass.

After commission, that will be a small loss unfortunately.

Next - Neil and Catherine's backup buy, the salt trough.

The opening bid of £10...

It's the same woman that got my...

16. 18.

-DIANA:

-They're off. Good.

£18, near the rostrum. Any further interest?

I'll sell... Oh, 20 there. 22. 25.

28. 28, 30. No?

Still on the rostrum, at £28, any further interest?

I'll sell for £28...

And that goes to 609.

-That's not bad.

-CATHERINE: Disappointing.

-I thought you'd do well with that.

-That was one of our best ones.

A loss of £2, and a bit more

when you take commission into account.

But - it's all yet to play for.

We've each got one lot to go, and you're £15 ahead of us.

Diana and Paul's final

and most expensive lot is the 18th-century oak portable desk.

Ta-dum!

£50, anywhere? Anyone interested?

50 I'm bid. £55...

It's £55 behind the counter. 55.

60, 65, 70.

75, 80, 85, 90...

(Somebody's determined.)

120, 130, 140... No? It's 130 on my left, seated.

Selling for 130, any further interest?

I'll sell for £130...

That fantastic profit for Diana and Paul means

the elephant vesta case really needs to come up trumps

or Neil and Catherine are out of the game.

And it's with me at £20 with commission, £22 in the room...

-22, 25, 28...

-Good.

-28, 30, 32.

-Yeah.

35, 38.

£38, the lady's bid. Any interest at £40?

It's 38 on my left, any further interest?

I'll sell for £38...

-Well done.

-That's better than we thought.

I think that was all right!

That loss is the final nail in the coffin for Neil and Catherine.

But it's been a fantastic contest.

Well, I want to congratulate you two.

-Never mind.

-Yes, congratulations.

-I love you...

Congratulations, and well done.

-Paul, congratulations.

-Well done.

-Good spot on the desk.

-Always a pleasure.

-Well done.

Our celebrities started with £400 each.

Neil and Catherine put up a valiant effort, but unfortunately

after auction fees they made a small loss, so they end up with £396.52.

Nice couple, though.

But claiming victory today - Dame Diana and Paul, finishing the trip

with £448.66, with all profits going to Children in Need. Well done.

Did we have fun?

-That's the main thing.

-Absolutely.

-It's been a ball.

-Compadre?

-Compadre!

-Fellow victor.

-We did, didn't we?

-Loving your work.

-NEIL:

-Thank you for a marvellous experience.

-Thank you.

-Well done, Paul.

-Always a joy.

-# I'll see you again... #

-In all the old familiar places.

-Great.

Safe journey, folks!

-You can drive this time. I've been driving for years. Give it a go.

-Ohh!

-Oh, all right, then, come here. Come on.

-OK, thanks.

-Come on, last time.

-Lovely.

-Till next time.

-Till the next time.

-Madam...

I long to hear you crashing those gears for the last time!