Episode 11 Great Movie Mistakes


Episode 11

Matthew Crosby, Ben Clark and Tom Parry from comedy group Pappy's expose all the hapless continuity errors, awful anachronisms and gaping plot holes from Hollywood in 2013.


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Transcript


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There was once a noble quest undertaken by Tommo and Ben,

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two hairy men from the Midlands, and Matthew the painfully white.

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Bravely, they sought out motion picture mishaps,

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cinematic screw-ups and filmic failures.

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They travelled as far as Odeon and through the many caverns of Vue,

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where they have returned with their prey,

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captured on shiny golden rings known as DVDs.

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Fine, fine, I know they're not gold.

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Join them now as they celebrate Great Movie Mistakes.

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-Rotten Tomatoes.

-Oh! Yes, please! My favourite.

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Think I'll stick to the popcorn.

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-It's a movie review site.

-What?

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Uninformed slobs lying around giving their inexpert opinion on films.

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-I hate that.

-Yeah. Just imagine.

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HE BELCHES

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Anyway, this section features films that were the darlings of the critics

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and rated most highly on IMDb, Rotten Tomatoes, that sort of thing.

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-I hope it features my favourite film of 2013.

-What was that, Ben?

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Waterworld.

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Well, A, that was made in 1995 and B, it was cobblers, mate.

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Actually, Tom, the Waterworld I'm referring to was

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a 15-minute clip on a rather niche premium website.

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Let's have a look at those mistakes.

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Looper is a clever and original time-travel film.

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I say this because I actually understand it.

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But look at the gun.

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He cocks it.

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Now, it's uncocked.

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Now, he's cocked it again.

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-Sounds like my weekend.

-Was that supposed to be smutty?

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-No, I bought a gun.

-Oh.

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What the hell's going on out there?

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So, let me get this straight.

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Bruce Willis and Joseph Gordon-Levitt are the same person?

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If that's the case,

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why is Bruce left-handed...

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..and Joseph right-handed?

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That's a damn fine point.

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-I think Bruce might just be using a left-handed gun.

-Ssh, Ben.

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Let's play a game of "Who's In The Truck?"

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-The kid and his

-mum! If only.

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Look again, it's empty!

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Apart from a roll cage to stop the people who aren't even in there

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getting hurt.

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Clearly, the director removed the child and actress before the crash

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which, in terms of verisimilitude, is frankly irresponsible.

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I'm sorry.

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You never cared about her and you never cared about us.

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Mud, an engrossing, heart-warming modern fairy tale.

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Not about the cheesy glam-rock group from the '70s?

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No, it's a film about mud.

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The mud in this scene magically disappears from that boy's trousers.

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Must be a fairy tale when you don't even need to wash your grubby kecks.

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End Of Watch is a hard-hitting and intense movie

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set on 06/08/2011 which, being America, means it's the 8th of June.

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-Nutters.

-But look here!

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Jake's paperwork says 8/19/12, a whole year in their future,

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and either the 19th of August or the 8th of Matthewary,

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the 19th month in my invented calendar.

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I'm angry you didn't include Benuary.

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Nobenber had more of a ring to it for some reason.

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Life Of Pi. Beautiful cinematography but terrible mistakes.

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-This is an absolute disgrace! Look at the ship.

-Choppy waters.

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Indeed, Matthew. But has our boy, Pi, noticed? Somehow, no.

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His bedroom is incredibly calm.

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-Wait, that's supposed to be in the same ship?

-I know!

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Look at this girl in the bottom centre.

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Can you see a flower in her hair?

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-IN MEDIEVAL STYLE:

-Sir, I tell you I cannot.

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Well, look again!

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-Gadzooks!

-Ben, are you all right?

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I think so. Are you sure this is tea?

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It's the nostalgically-fun and sweet comedy Wreck-It Ralph.

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But there's nothing funny about this mistake.

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-Nonetheless, we've included it.

-Oh, God, yeah.

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-Deanna's dress is shiny with leaves and flowers on it.

-Look again.

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It's a plain dress.

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And seconds later, she's by the door wearing the original dress.

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I don't know what to believe any more.

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Now, I've got a bone to pick with you, Ralph.

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This is that candy go-kart game over by the Whack-A-Mole.

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-I've got to get out of here.

-Mole? Whack-A-Mole, is it, Ralph?

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Ha! It's Whack-A-Troll!

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Wildly inconsistent, which is what I shouted

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when I first watched this film.

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Is that why we're banned from the Odeon in Crystal Palace?

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Essentially, yes.

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Ralph's sticking Sour Bill to a candy tree.

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Note the branch pointing downwards.

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-Stick around.

-Yes, OK, I will.

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But now, Sour Bill has freed himself and, in freeing himself,

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has somehow twisted the branch so it points to his right.

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Doubly impressive given that his hands and feet

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float next to his body.

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All very sloppy.

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Is this Ryan Gosling starring as the Milky Bar Kid?

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No, Tom, this is the powerful

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-and intriguing drama The Place Beyond The Pines.

-Oh, that's a shame.

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He could have shared his stash of chocolate with

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the lady at the table behind him.

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Those plates the waitress just brought over have vanished.

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Anything you think I might want to know before I leave here?

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Hi, guys. Ben here.

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I'd just like to remind everyone

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that not all films have to be intellectual.

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They don't all need a plot or a script.

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Sometimes all you need to have a good time is to watch a man

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get hit in the crotch.

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Awww!

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Ben makes a valid point.

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Sometimes you just can't beat a bit of lowbrow comedy.

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Urgh! I've changed my mind, this isn't funny at all!

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Here's a selection of lowbrow clunkers. Enjoy!

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CLANK

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I don't know, you tell me.

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Ah, The Hangover III, an utter movie mistake

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distilling all the worst bits of

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the brilliant Hangover I and the middling Hangover II.

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Mr Chow here is going mental with a knife to Stu's neck.

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The right side of Stu's neck, that is.

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So how come the cut's on his left side for the rest of the film?

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And more to the point, why was this awful film made?

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HE SINGS: # Money! #

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Quick, guys, it's Zach Galifianakis,

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the best thing about The Hangover III.

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Sorry, Matthew, the sound editors have ruined this scene for me.

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You see this saucy exchange of a lollipop?

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Cor, do I?!

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SHE SUCKS AND RATTLES LOLLIPOP

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LOLLIPOP CRUNCHES

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Clearly she's crunching and chewing on the lollipop.

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-There it is, whole again.

-Thanks a bunch, sound effects people(!)

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'Are you in a library?'

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It's the cast of the Wedding Crashers

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doing a not-as-good film.

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Yeah, The Internship wasn't exactly laugh-out-loud.

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This scene's funny, though. But not the way they intended.

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Check out the books behind them. They keep changing!

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And the red trolley

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disappears constantly!

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Much like my will to live whilst watching this film.

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Now, there's a lot of hate for Movie 43.

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That's because it's absolutely

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one of the worst films in the history of cinema.

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Oh, come on, it's got a great cast!

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Who were all essentially blackmailed into doing the film

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by the directors. Here's the actually very talented

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Anna Faris and Chris Pratt.

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-This is perfect.

-Julie, we've been together for over a year.

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16 months and two weeks.

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THEY LAUGH

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And in that time, I've come to realise that...

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..you mean everything to me.

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Oh, Doug, you, too!

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-Aw, Julie and Doug.

-No, no, Ben!

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They call themselves that here, but on the credits, see,

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they're listed as "Vanessa" and "Jason!"

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I'd argue that's another great gag in a great film!

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I'd argue it's another misfire in a film that should have

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genuinely never been made.

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It's the unashamedly crude Ted.

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Marky Mark wants to prove he's all grown up

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since his time with the so-called Funky Bunch in the early '90s.

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But, look, he can do up his tie and everything!

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And, for further emphasis, he does it up again.

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Hanging around with a teddy bear isn't terribly adult.

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It's just a movie, Ben.

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And, OK, this is ridiculous. When Mila Kunis comes out of the shower,

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she has full make-up on!

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Down here. Not looking up your towel, swear to God.

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Not looking up your towel, not looking at your funny business.

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Hang on, Ben. There is a chance that she actually is that beautiful.

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Or that she's wearing waterproof mascara?

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Let me talk first, all right? And then you can say whatever you want.

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Well, I'm marking it up as a mistake.

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It's time for Donny, aka Giovanni Ribisi, to show us his dance moves.

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Some pretty decent hip work there.

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And now, thanks to his disappearing drink, he can use his arms.

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Beautiful!

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How many continuity guys does it take to change a light bulb?

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-I don't know.

-Well, look at this Christian Science reading room.

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The lights are on.

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But once we're here with Mila in her car...

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Hey!

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..they're off.

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However, spin forward just a few seconds and...

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I've seen the light!

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MOBILE RINGTONE CHIMES

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OK, so...

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It's mirth-filled fun action comedy The Heat starring Sandra Bullock

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and Melissa McCarthy.

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Whoa, Bullock's put on a lot of weight for this role. Respect.

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When hiring extras in your next feature film,

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try to make sure they're not identical triplets wearing

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the same costume, as can be seen in the background of this scene.

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Look at this guy!

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And now this fellow, same shirt and bag.

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-And now this chap.

-Guys, I'm pretty sure they're the same person.

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Wow, Matthew, wow!

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Now, Shannon here hurls a watermelon at a criminal.

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Notice how it doesn't break.

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He, Matthew. Criminals are people too.

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I meant the watermelon, which is now broken up all over the place!

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A watermelon! Oh, hell, no! See, I told you you was a racist!

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But not here.

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And that's your lot. See you soon for some more...

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-ALL:

-Great movie mistakes!

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Matthew Crosby, Ben Clark and Tom Parry from comedy group Pappy's expose all the hapless continuity errors, awful anachronisms and gaping plot holes from Hollywood in 2013.


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