Episode 13 Great Movie Mistakes

There was once a noble quest undertaken by Tommo and Ben,

two hairy men from the Midlands, and Matthew, the painfully white.

Bravely, they sought out motion picture mishaps,

cinematic screw ups and filmic failures.

They travelled as far as Odeon, and through the many Caverns of Vue.

But they have returned with their prey, captured on shiny,

golden rings known as DVDs.

Fine, fine, I know they're not gold!

Join them now as they celebrate Great Movie Mistakes.

-Popcorn.

-Check.

-Nachos.

-Check.

-Beers.

-Check.

-Dimmable lighting?

-Checkmate.

-Wow, guys, this movie night is shaping up beautifully.

-Movie night?

-No, these are our supplies for when the apocalypse happens.

-Really?

With these provisions, your heart would last about a week!

I think you'll find it's sustained us for the last six years.

It's a medical miracle. Technically, we should have "tri-abetes".

-Oh, which reminds me, M&Ms.

-Peanuts and chocolate. Checkity check check.

Well, it's lucky your apocalypse provisions dovetail

so nicely with my idea for a perfect movie night.

So, let's get cracking with our first batch of faulty movie moments.

Who are you talking to?

The burning segment of the frontal lobe...

-It's Pacific Rim!

-Fantastic!

Guillermo del Toro's exciting and spectacular monster film is

surprisingly enjoyable, but it's not without a clanger or two.

Go on.

-Check out that headpiece that Newton's wearing.

-I see it.

See it now? Fastened round his neck without him touching it.

Shockingly unrealistic.

Unlike that giant, floating kaiju brain, which is bang on.

One...

HE GASPS

What's to tell?

You know, them Mach Ones who scraped...

Mirror, mirror on the wall, what is the most glaring error of them all?

I'd say, probably this one.

Watch Idris Elba somehow manage to move from right next

to the mirror...

to all the way into the middle of the room!

Teleporting near a mirror is seven years' bad luck, right?

..medical radar for a while, but...

the last time I jockeyed was in Tokyo.

Great! It's Star Trek Into Darkness.

Star Trek Into Awesomeness, more like.

Kirk's drowning his sorrows, but check out his glass.

The futuristic orb of ice is drowned in whisky. But now?

Where's the whisky gone?!

-KIRK:

-It's been transferred.

-Teleported somewhere?

-No wonder he's upset.

I will remain behind and divert all power to life support.

Sulu's a renegade. The enterprise is falling apart and he's driving

without a seat belt!

All due respect, commander, but we're not going anywhere.

Oh, wait. There it is.

Wait! If we look later on, he's taken it off again!

And Spock's obviously had a go at him, as it's back on.

There's no excuse not to use protection.

SCREAMING

Oh, I love the way they teleport in this movie.

I love the way Uhura is both fierce and sexy, a true independent woman.

Er... OK. But speaking of Uhura, where is she in this shot?

Teleported into my dreams?

-And...back again. That was quick.

-I don't need long.

It's time for some slightly above average

-super-heroics in Man Of Steel.

-Oh, and here's a good blooper.

A message is being broadcast worldwide.

But it's somehow night-time in all these places around the world!

-Ridiculous!

-I don't know.

My girlfriend's travelling at the moment, and whenever I call

her she doesn't pick up because it's the middle of the night.

I just think it's always night-time in a lot of places.

Ben, she's in Cornwall. Let it go, buddy.

-WOMAN:

-It's coming in on the RSS feeds.

MALE VOICE: You are not alone.

Time to shed some light on another Man Of Steel clunker.

Those soldiers are clearly casting a shadow to the side,

despite the sun being very, definitely behind Superman.

Massively inconsistent.

What makes you think she's here?

Surely the real inconsistency is why a man with almost unlimited

power and the ability to singlehandedly solve all the world's

problems chooses to spend 40 hours a week working

as a newspaper reporter,

essentially neglecting the cries from help from people worldwide,

all of whom he can definitely hear.

That's actually an amazingly good point.

Take one of the greatest works of literature ever,

get Baz Luhrmann to make an awesome film of it starring

Leonardo DiCaprio, and what do you get?

-Romeo And Juliet.

-Absolutely.

Sadly, the Great Gatsby wasn't half as good,

but hats off for their hard efforts.

Hats off indeed. But wait.

Hats on here.

Oh, and the car they're overtaking vanishes.

Hat's all, folks!

Cliched and clunky,

White House Down shows there inevitably comes a time

when any president is required to fire a missile launcher

out of the side of his limousine.

If this whole concept wasn't mistake enough,

check out Channing Tatum's arm.

As Jamie Foxx strikes him on the head,

we see either some marks for editing

or a really terrible tattoo.

Hit me on the head with a rocket while I'm trying to drive!

Get me to the fence, Cale.

And he's opening the back window.

For security reasons you can only open the front window

in presidential cars.

As I remember from my affair with Clinton in '95.

He has a rocket launcher!

There's something you don't see every day.

World War Z now, but you won't be catching any Z's

if you watch this hard-edged neo-zombie action thriller.

It's great.

But listen to Dr Fassbach making a basic medical error.

-The analogy I keep coming back to is Spanish flu.

-Spanish flu?

It didn't exist in 1918, but by 1920 it killed 3% of the world.

Didn't exist in 1918? I think you'll find it broke out in 1918, mate. Ha!

The plane's going down!

Let's put on our oxygen masks while we try to stabilise the engines!

It doesn't look promising. There's a massive hole in the plane.

But with certain death looming, the pilots have opted to

-take off their oxygen masks and wear normal headsets.

-But why?

It's simple. So they can kiss.

With the zombie disease causing havoc worldwide,

the population's rapidly decreasing.

Soon the only person left will be a teleporting bearded man.

-Sorry, what?

-Check him out!

White beardy-hair man. He's everywhere. Behind Brad...

And now sorting through papers.

Only he can move fast enough to outrun the zombie hordes.

Sir, there is nowhere to evacuate you to.

Hello, my name's Ben.

I'm auditioning for the part of Wolverine.

I'll be reading for the part of Wolverine.

I'll be reading for the part of Rogue.

No, only kidding!

I'm reading for Wolverine. Or as I like to call him, Wolf-erine.

Damn, this healing factor of mine is just so powerful!

I'm healing all the time.

Even now.

Will I walk you home?

Of claws I'll walk you home!

# Prince Charming

# Prince Charming. #

That's right. My bones are laced with Adam Ant-ium.

-CANADIAN ACCENT:

-I'm just a stubborn Canadian

here to show you what justice is all aboot!

About! Er, aboot. Justice.

I'm more of an XXX-man.

Hurgh!

Yeah, just checking you'll CGI the body in afterwards, right?

That's how Jackman did it, right?

It's time to look at some careless action movie mistakes.

As a fellow mutant, I can only admire the solid

and surprisingly mature action romp - the wolverine.

The ability to burp the national anthem of any commonwealth country

is not a mutant power.

It's not unimpressive, though.

Regardless, check out Hugh Jackman's hitherto unknown mutant power

shifting from lying on his side...

to lying on his back without apparently moving at all.

Here's Jackman tearing up some fools at a funeral,

whilst Viper films it all on her phone.

But wait! Look as she lowers it.

The footage on the phone clearly isn't happening live.

Maybe she's simply using her phone

to watch the stunning action film The Wolverine.

It's an extraordinary meta piece of filmmaking.

-Now, train your eyes if you will on those passers-by.

-What?

Those passers-by are looking directly at the camera.

-Yeah.

-They should probably train their eyes elsewhere.

Ben, you're aware I made that exact same joke literally seconds before?

Boys, let's get back on track.

ALL: Ay-oh!

Nothing says not particularly good action film like the words

-GI Joe: Retaliation.

-But it did bring us this error.

-Look at Channing Tatum's ears, everyone.

-A bit harsh.

I don't think they can be classed as a mistake.

No, his headphones. Firstly they're on...

Then they're off...

Then they're on again.

-Just like Ross and Rachel.

-Wow, where did that come from?

-I've only just got to the end of Friends.

-Oh.

It's the awesome Iron Man 3. Tons better than the second one.

Now, throughout the film he's got blood on his left eye and cheek.

But somehow for this show it's on his right side.

And now it's back.

Eye know.

Is that a joke?

Eye.

A rare sight of implausibility in the usually highly-realistic

Bond franchise.

# It's Skyfall! #

Here's Craig with the old drive head-first into the side

of a bridge then land on a train trick.

But what about the motorbike? It's back on its wheels...

But where is it here?

Probably transformed into a Cuban cigar

-and landed in Craig's inside pocket.

-Sounds about par for the course.

Well, get after them, for God's sake!

Your successor is yet to be appointed, so we'll be asking you...

I'm not an idiot.

Dame Judi Dench is being tactfully fired by Ralph Fiennes

-for losing government secrets.

-Keep an eye out for her handbag.

M, you've had a great run.

You should leave with dignity.

Go to hell with dignity. I'll leave when the job's done.

Yeah, she should also leave with her handbag.

Ironically, the handbag contained more government secrets,

which is why Ralph has had it vaporised.

As anybody who's chased Javier Bardem

dressed as a policeman through a London underground station knows

it's impossible to slide down the middle of an escalator.

Yeah, you won't so much slide as bounce off the emergency stop

buttons and raise barriers.

Not to mention the dog-eared copies of free newspapers.

The Oscars always leads to heated debate.

-I'm telling you, this is going to win best picture.

-This will win!

-This needs to win!

-Guys, what's going on?

We're just arguing over who's going to win best picture.

Judging by that, neither of you,

although you're both frontrunners for worst joke.

BOTH: Yes!

Speaking of best picture, let's have a look at some shocking

continuity gaffes from this year's Oscar-nominated films.

The jaw-dropping almost accurate Argo now, with two mistakes in one.

-Like when I got the word legend tattooed on my...

-OK, OK!

First things first. Check this out. Bear in mind Argo is set in 1979.

There's a script called Passions Requiem dated 2009.

Ha! I knew Ben Affleck received my autobiographical screenplay.

Secondly, you see the Argo script's fancy black vinyl cover?

I like it!

-Well, where the hell has it gone?

-Affleck's eaten it, has he?

It's very possible, Ben.

-Here's Affleck writing a postcard.

-Show-off.

-But now look.

The word "so" has jumped down a line.

In fact, it's an entirely different lot of writing on the card.

So he has magic handwriting and he's Batman.

What chance do the rest of us have?

-This is a good blunder. Brace yourselves.

-OK.

Here's Christoph Waltz putting on his braces in the brutal gutsy

and fantastic Django Unchained.

That's fair enough.

Find my wife.

Buy her freedom.

-But he does it twice! Do you see?

-Sort of.

-He's putting them on when he already did.

-Yeah, I guess so.

-Brace yourselves!

-Because he was putting...

-Yeah, yeah, we get it.

Extras are like buses. At first there are six of them.

And then there are only three.

And then back to six. See?

How is that like buses?

Well, you pay £2.40 to enter them.

Buses that is, not extras. That simile is lacking, if I'm honest.

"Lincoln is a thrilling deeply enjoyable film"

is a sentence that tells me I have nothing in common with my date.

Come on, I can't think of a better way to spend seven hours.

Check out this clonker. See the president's glasses?

-Well, look again cos they've gone.

-Wait, clonker?

Yeah, it's my new word that I've made up for blooper. Thoughts?

Hmm, not strong.

Our man proving why he's fit to lead a nation.

His crotch actually generates paperwork.

Actually, this is a blooper. Here he is putting papers into a folder...

Next shot they're back in his hand. So much for the magic crotch theory.

It's the gripping intense Zero Dark 30.

-And this is for the geography buffs amongst you.

-Say no more.

-Oh, I didn't know you were into geography.

-I'm not.

So please say no more.

Those street signs are quite clearly not Kuwaiti.

They're Indian, eh? Madness.

Matthew, really, say no more.

Time for the emotional-walloping Beasts Of The Southern Wild.

And here they are deep in a storm.

So, the trees closest to us are moving.

but what about those perfectly still ones in the background?

The all-encompassing storm hasn't reached them yet?

I'm chalking this one up as a stormy clanger.

Here's the delightful Hushpuppy popping a Michael Jordan jersey

on her sleeping father.

And that's either a knock-off replica or a reverse shot

because that number 23 is backwards.

Good spot, Ben! How did you see that?

Well, my teachers always said I was a bit backwards. It's a gift.

Look at these two cups.

Apart from appalling parenting, there's a massive mistake here.

Hushpuppy grabs the cup with the handle...

but now the dad has it.

Now she's got it again.

Nope, it's the dad's again.

Oh, God.

-Drinking really does affect your vision.

-Yeah, you're right there.

Which Matthew just said that?

And that's your lot.

See you soon for some more Great Movie Mistakes!