Episode 2 Great Movie Mistakes

There was once a noble quest undertaken by Tommo and Ben,

two hairy men from the Midlands, and Matthew the painfully white.

Bravely, they sought out motion picture mishaps,

cinematic screw-ups and filmic failures.

They travelled as far as Odeon and through the many caverns of Vue,

where they have returned with their pray,

captured on shiny golden rings known as DVDs.

Fine, fine, I know they're not gold.

Join them now as they celebrate Great Movie Mistakes.

-Turn that off.

-Not watching that.

Hello, we're Pappy's and welcome to Great Movie Mistakes.

My Greatest Movie Mistake was messing up my audition to play Edward in the Twilight films.

Should never have got that spray tan.

Mine was being Bella in your audition tape.

Did we really have to act out the whole film?

What Tom and Ben have expertly failed to explain

is that tonight we're going to be going through clip after clip

of Great Movie Mistakes. I can't wait.

Bella. It's time.

Stop it.

And which of this year's movies features the most mistakes?

Find out soon.

Hi, guys. Ben here.

I'd just like to remind everyone

that not all films have to be intellectual.

They don't all need a plot or a script.

Sometimes all you need to have a good time is to watch a man

get hit in the crotch.

Awww!

Ben makes a valid point.

Sometimes you just can't beat a bit of lowbrow comedy.

Urgh! I've changed my mind, this isn't funny at all!

Here's a selection of lowbrow clunkers. Enjoy!

CLANK

You OK, Chow?

I don't know, you tell me.

Ah, The Hangover III, an utter movie mistake

distilling all the worst bits of

the brilliant Hangover I and the middling Hangover II.

Mr Chow here is going mental with a knife to Stu's neck.

The right side of Stu's neck, that is.

So how come the cut's on his left side for the rest of the film?

And more to the point, why was this awful film made?

HE SINGS: # Money! #

Quick, guys, it's Zach Galifianakis,

the best thing about The Hangover III.

Sorry, Matthew, the sound editors have ruined this scene for me.

You see this saucy exchange of a lollipop?

Cor, do I?!

SHE SUCKS AND RATTLES LOLLIPOP

LOLLIPOP CRUNCHES

Clearly she's crunching and chewing on the lollipop.

-There it is, whole again.

-Thanks a bunch, sound effects people(!)

'Are you in a library?'

It's the cast of the Wedding Crashers

doing a not-as-good film.

Yeah, The Internship wasn't exactly laugh-out-loud.

This scene's funny, though. But not the way they intended.

Check out the books behind them. They keep changing!

And the red trolley

disappears constantly!

Much like my will to live whilst watching this film.

Now, there's a lot of hate for Movie 43.

That's because it's absolutely

one of the worst films in the history of cinema.

Oh, come on, it's got a great cast!

Who were all essentially blackmailed into doing the film

by the directors. Here's the actually very talented

Anna Faris and Chris Pratt.

-This is perfect.

-Julie, we've been together for over a year.

16 months and two weeks.

THEY LAUGH

And in that time, I've come to realise that...

..you mean everything to me.

Oh, Doug, you too!

-Ahh, Julie and Doug.

-No, no, Ben!

They call themselves that here, but on the credits, see,

they're listed as "Vanessa" and "Jason!"

I'd argue that's another great gag in a great film!

I'd argue it's another misfire in a film that should have

genuinely never been made.

It's the unashamedly crude Ted.

Marky Mark wants to prove he's all grown up

since his time with the so-called Funky Bunch in the early '90s.

But look, he can do up his tie and everything!

And for further emphasis, he does it up again.

Hanging around with a teddy bear isn't terribly adult.

It's just a movie, Ben.

And, OK, this is ridiculous. When Mila Kunis comes out of the shower,

she has full make-up on!

Down here. Not looking up your towel, swear to God.

Not looking up your towel, not looking at your funny business.

Hang on, Ben. There is a chance that she actually is that beautiful.

Or that she's wearing waterproof mascara?

Let me talk first, all right? And then you can say whatever you want.

Well, I'm marking it up as a mistake.

It's time for Donny, aka Giovanni Ribisi, to show us his dance moves.

Some pretty decent hip work there.

And now, thanks to his disappearing drink, he can use his arms.

Beautiful!

How many continuity guys does it take to change a light bulb?

-I don't know.

-Well, look at this Christian Science reading room.

The lights are on.

But once we're here with Mila in her car...

Hey!

..they're off.

However, spin forward just a few seconds and...

I've seen the light!

MOBILE RINGTONE CHIMES

OK, so...

It's mirth-filled fun action comedy The Heat starring Sandra Bullock

and Melissa McCarthy.

Whoa, Bullock's put on a lot of weight for this role. Respect.

When hiring extras in your next feature film,

try to make sure they're not identical triplets wearing

the same costume, as can be seen in the background of this scene.

Look at this guy!

And now this fellow, same shirt and bag.

-And now this chap.

-Guys, I'm pretty sure they're the same person.

Wow, Matthew, wow!

Now, Shannon here hurls a watermelon at a criminal.

Notice how it doesn't break.

He, Matthew. Criminals are people too.

I meant the watermelon, which is now broken up all over the place!

A watermelon! Oh, hell, no! See, I told you you was a racist!

But not here.

The bad thing about movies is if you watch a terrible one you can't get the time back.

True, that.

I wrote to Ben Affleck after I watched Pearl Harbor

demanding that he send me back three hours plus interest.

-He never replied!

-What were you expecting he'd send?

Three and a half hours.

Maybe a bit more, according to the exchange rate.

I was very disappointed by Gone In 60 Seconds.

Way longer than advertised.

I think that's the time it took them to write the script.

ALL: Hey-o!

Actually, I was pleasantly surprised by The NeverEnding Story.

Slightly alarmist title, that one.

So, as a public service, we've trawled through the world's

worst films and highlighted the mistakes so you don't have to.

Yippie-ki-yay, Mother Hubbard.

-Good old Brucie as John McClane, can't go wrong.

-I beg to differ.

Look at the car window - open.

Then closed.

That's about as wrong as it gets, mate.

Check out this packed courtroom.

I had a similar turn out when I was in court for my naked rambling.

Yeah, you really shouldn't have rambled nude

-through the packed courtroom, Ben.

-So it transpired.

Oh, my days, it's a triple car bomb! Pe-eow, pe-eow, pe-eow!

Don't worry, through the medium of continuity errors,

everyone in the courtroom has miraculously escaped.

-Except for that guard.

-Don't worry, he gets shot.

-Yay.

Pay close attention and you'll see it.

There it is, proof that A Good Day To Die Hard was in fact

a film filmed by a crew.

Cor, you've really lifted the lid on that one(!)

You're welcome.

What is it with old people and phones?

They just can't work them properly.

I'd argue this old lad is actually quite impressive.

He successfully made an outgoing call while still on the dialling screen.

Either that, or he's having

a full-blown discussion with the voices in his head -

in which case, that whole scene is just really upsetting.

Wait for my command to execute...

An all-star cast doesn't make a great film,

as Olympus Has Fallen shows.

What ruins it for me is this.

Even I know the plural of terrorist isn't terrorist!

Go on, then. What is it, then?

Terrori?

The most protected building on earth.

In After Earth, our planet's now host to giant creatures.

And camera cranes.

Ah, yes, and camera cranes,

one of which reveals itself with its shadow.

This really is a slow and tedious film. Let's move on. Quick!

Judd Apatow goes grown-up at the request of absolutely

no-one, in the coarse and plot-less This Is 40.

-It's just a bunch of guys that get together and ride.

-I know, I know.

But watch, as Barry heckles the dangerous driver.

The car disappears!

-You want to see pictures of the kids?

-Oh, yeah!

Hooray! 3rd Rock From The Sun!

John Lithgow's done much more than that, Ben.

-He's a Shakespearean actor.

-Yes, but that mobile is clearly upside-down.

Is he playing "Man Who Can't Use an iPhone Properly" from Hamlet?

That sixth form update of Hamlet you did was NOT the definitive version!

As we all know, Americans are only capable

of driving automatic vehicles.

They also can't handle roundabouts.

But to make things tricky, Pete and Debbie are driving whilst their

car is in park mode, when the thing shouldn't be able to move at all!

-Bit of a nonstarter all round, this movie.

-Boring.

-What does he have you doing?

-Nothin', baby...

If you're one of the 11 people who have seen Stolen, I can only

offer you my condolences.

It is not strong, though it does mark a milestone

in that it is Nicolas Cage's ten millionth film!

But it does have this blunder. Here, Cage knocks this guy off his stool...

MAN GROANS

And now, somehow, the stool is back upright.

You tell me where she is

or I'll blow your lunch all over this carpet.

Yeah, honestly, don't see this film.

Here's where Stolen goes from savagely mediocre to really gross.

Nicolas Cage escapes from his handcuffs using

the time-honoured method of dislocating his left thumb.

Oi, nasty!

Hello. I'm here...

Then, after a preposterous double car crash,

he gets out of the car and resets his RIGHT thumb.

Or possibly also dislocates it for fun. Who knows?

Really comin' down to the wire on this one.

It's the ghastly and unwanted Sweeney movie.

Now, we've seen over-keen extras in films,

but it's a bit much when the extra is St Paul's Cathedral.

-See it here?

-Yep.

Ah, yes, it also pops up later on the other side of the car here.

They also seem to be driving along the same bridge for absolutely ages.

What secret massive bridge are they using?

The one next to the two St Paul's Cathedrals, I guess.

Sharknado, a concept so daft Ben could have come up with it.

You say that, but I still haven't attracted any funding

for Goatpocalypse Now.

Thank God for that.

Now, searching for mistakes in this is like shooting fish in a barrel,

which is probably the way the special effects were filmed.

Here we see a house clearly massively flooded

and sharks are swimming all over the place,

which really begs the question of how they opened the door!

And why the water level outside is almost nonexistent.

And how they managed to close the door again.

And why there are sharks in tornadoes!

And what Tara Reid did to her once promising career.

Great news, guys!

She's just signed up for Goatpocalypse Now!

Everybody out of the pool!

In a film with amazingly ropey special effects,

it's remarkable that they wasted money on this effect

that makes absolutely no sense.

Specifically, that Connect Four game.

-Is one of the reds actually floating in mid-air?

-Yes, Tom, it is.

Great work, art department(!)

Anachronisms.

-The fear of spiders.

-No!

Anachrophobia is the fear of spiders.

Anachronisms are when you have the political beliefs of a spider.

Actually, it's when something from the wrong time period

appears in a film.

Ever since the digital watch in Ben-Hur,

eagle-eyed movie mistakes legends, such as ourselves...

Guilty as charged.

..have been spotting anachronisms, circling them in red pen,

pointing at them, laughing at them and high-fiving.

More mistakes from the brilliant Argo.

We're virtually Argonauts!

Now, check out that broken Hollywood sign.

Factually accurate.

Oh! You're wrong, Matthew.

Sure, it fell into disrepair in the '70s,

but, it was famously refurbished in 1978,

a full year before the Iranian hostage crisis began.

Amateurs.

The long and serious Lincoln again

and here's proof they had electrical sockets in the 19th century.

They did?

Well, they must have done, see? There it is.

As we all know, Spielberg is a details man.

OK, boys. What's wrong with

this scene? Listen close.

The war will take our son.

A sniper or a shrapnel shell, or typhus.

Same as it took Willie, it takes hundreds of boys a day.

He'll die uselessly...

-Something about Willie taking hundreds of boys a day?

-No, no, no.

She used the term sniper.

As we all know, this term wasn't used in the US

until well after the Civil War.

She would have meant sharpshooter.

-I didn't know that.

-Nor did I.

Well, that fact brought the house down at my

live action role-playing club!

Guys?

Who's up for a very petty anachronism from

the powerful, violent but underwhelming Lawless?

-Not me.

-Please, no.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, as you can see, that camera is

a Kodak Brownie Target Six-20,

which wasn't in production until 1946,

nine years after he used it!

-Is it over?

-Yes. Thank God.

You've got to keep steady...

We weren't talking business yet.

We were discussing my curiosity.

Cor, Django Unchained!

I love an explosive, bloodthirsty tour de force!

I love how Quentin Tarantino plays fast and loose

with the rules of film-making.

You mean how he subverts the conventional

tropes of the Western genre?

No, how he gives DiCaprio a straw for his drink.

They weren't commercially available until 1888.

This is set in 1858!

-People used hollow reeds back then.

-Wow.

What a maverick.

You don't make it sound too flattering, but more or less, yes.

Here's Charlie Sheen in the whimsical '70s clunker

A Glimpse Into the Mind of Charles Swan III.

-Catchy title.

-Set in the '70s, you say?

-Yes.

Well, I'm sure Galaga and Ms Pac-Man weren't around till 1981!

They should've shown a space hopper and an Etch A Sketch instead! Ha!

-I'm not into this modern metrosexual stuff.

-You surprise me, Ben.

The last time you washed this dressing gown, it was pre-Avatar.

I'm talking about blokey films, Matthew! Macho stuff.

I don't like these girly films with things like feelings,

and love, and three-dimensional female characterisation.

A shining example of modern manhood.

Speaking of which, close your dressing gown.

Look! I want films with explosions, cars, blood!

My ideal film would be about an exploding car made of blood.

Contribute to the Kickstarter, guys!

Here, for Ben's enjoyment

and for your viewing pleasure are some macho movie mistakes.

Eurgh!

Oh! That was harsh.

It's my day off.

Should be quite a weekend.

What The Last Stand lacks in plot, acting and script,

it makes up for in movie mistakes.

Here's Arnie with a bit of a drink problem.

Look at the way he's holding the cup with the handle to the side.

-But now he's holding it with a handle!

-What a mug.

This bearded baddie's a talented driver!

Yeah, he can somehow speed along,

despite the handbrake clearly being up!

Death is waiting in the kitchen

when you get up at night for a glass of milk.

-WOMAN:

-BLEEP.

And there he goes, turning his car into a ramp.

The man's amazing.

The boys must be making a crop circle in a corn field.

Check out Arnie,

shooting out from his open window like a boss.

BLEEP.

But wait! That window is definitely closed.

And either they're tinted, or there's no-one inside.

Crop circles are mysterious things.

It's the other fork, darling.

Sean Penn, Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone?

What could go wrong!

Quite a lot, sadly.

Gangster Squad is a bit undercooked.

There's even an uninspiring performance from Sean Penn's

napkin, which goes off for a Screen Actor's Guild-mandated break

halfway through the scene.

-I heard it was having an affair with Emma Stone's fork.

-Get out!

I think I'll just have a cigarette.

In the cheesy and juvenile The Man With The Iron Fists, MMA

no longer stands for Mixed Martial Arts,

but Movie Mistake Alert.

Ah yes, here's former pro-wrestler Batista off to the Lion's Temple.

But somehow his chin facial hair doesn't go with him.

That's a heavy-weight clanger.

Aaargh!

Action heroes never die!

Their sagging cadavers just

limp along into the increasingly silly The Expendables franchise.

Now, check the level of sloppiness on this dub. Watch this!

Watch your head!

Literally no idea what Lundgren is mouthing, but then I rarely do.

Hold on, wasn't that battering ram down a second ago?

Yes! Good spot. As the saying goes,

"It's up and down more than a battering ram in The Expendables 2."

Ah, so that's where that saying comes from!

Arnie's reportedly accused

of having wandering hands.

So much so, that even when they're tied to a chair, they come free.

Look at that.

Get him up!

They're back, though, in time for Stallone

to slur something incomprehensible.

-Trench?

-TRENCH:

-Oh, this is embarrassing.

Nice meeting you.

Explain this, my fellow movie mistakers.

Sly's bike makes a revving noise before he even lays

a hand on the throttle.

ENGINE REVS

Maybe the bike, just like I feel compelled to do right now,

is throttling itself?

Like this?

-Aargh! Aargh!

-Oh, my God! Oh!

This scene focuses on helicopter number 711,

named after the popular chain of American shops.

They're an old favourite.

What are you doing here?

-MAN:

-Moving on. You killed all my business.

But here, it's been replaced by helicopter number 712,

named after the combined age of the lead cast.

It is I, Mr Darcy.

I feel such emotion

and yet I feel none at all!

If my opinions about myself and immigration are to be believed,

I am both full of pride

and a little bit prejudiced.

Oh, my love,

no-one understands the power of what we have.

But soon, soon,

we shall be together.

Oh. I should probably do my audition.

See you later, my love.

Hello. My name's Ben.

Brood, brood, brood.

I am prone to brooding.

Loins.

Oh, my love,

no-one understands the power of what we...

Sorry, I can't do this.

This isn't for me.

My sweet love,

to be apart from you

was to be torn asunder by 1,000 ravenous jackals.

Loins!

Now, here's some dreadful howlers from recent romantic movies.

Did you get it?

I love a thoughtful, beautifully acted,

romantic movie like Take This Waltz, don't you, Ben?

I love food.

No, look, Sarah Silverman's dish disappears...

-What?

-WOMAN: Why don't you want Jordan to go?

..then reappears, like magic!

I wish I had a self-filling plate like that.

I think there must've been a shortage

of child actors in Hollywood

when they made Take This Waltz.

-Really?

-Yeah.

That kid's clearly a ventriloquist's dummy.

Her lips don't even move when she speaks.

I missed you, Auntie Margot.

-MARGOT:

-Oh, I missed you.

You're right! Go on, say "Gottle o' gear"!

I Give It a Year.

Not just the diagnosis Matthew received in the post on Monday.

Hey, I hadn't read that yet. Spoiler alert!

But also a sporadically funny and unusual romcom.

Tell you what's strange about this film, that pool game.

Now see that cue being waved all over the place...

You want to hit it on the edge there.

There it is again.

And now it's down by his side! Nonsense.

There's no point, is there?

-GIRL:

-Shakespeare.

That's a great guess, but no.

Shakespeare didn't write novels.

The Perks of Being a Wallflower is a deep

and actually rather touching film.

Here's Paul Rudd, claiming that

Dickens coined the term cliffhanger.

It was Charles Dickens.

Rubbish.

Yep, it was actually Thomas Hardy who invented it.

Sorry, I just meant I'm not a Paul Rudd fan.

But hang on, there's more! See that?

Yeah, they've spelt Emily Dickinson's name wrong!

There's an 'E' where there should be an 'I'!

Maybe they're using the Nordic tradition,

and this Emily was actually Charles Dickens' son?

You've really veered off course on that one, haven't you, Ben?

You should learn to participate.

Eyes up, gang. Charlie's arrived home.

See any cars in the driveway?

Bye, Charlie!

-No, sir.

-Quite right, there aren't any!

-MAN:

-Shut up, Candace!

You just stand there like a little bitch dog...

Now, Candace is rowing with Derek.

Charlie, just go! I can handle it!

Just don't wake up Mom and Dad.

Derek leaves and, aha!

A car has magically appeared!

That's a pretty strong perk of being a wallflower. Magic car.

Here's something troubling.

The way my feelings towards Emma Watson

developed near the end of the Harry Potter franchise?

No! Well, yes, absolutely yes, but no.

Look at her dress.

Way ahead of you, buddy.

No, see the straps?

They've disappeared.

-Splendid.

-Not splendid editing, though, eh?

Now, we all understand

the way American SAT scores work.

So here's Sam's results.

-1210.

-BOY:

-What?

Whaaat?!

Pause! Rewind! Enhance!

Always wanted to say that.

She got 1210?

Well, it says here she got

550 in Verbal and 460 in Math.

It's Maths, mate.

That adds up to 1010.

So she must have made an extra 200 points somehow.

And if anyone can send me video footage of this,

I will genuinely pay them £1210.

I've got multiple pairs of blue jeans!

Playing for Keeps is proof that

a romcom with a cast including

Gerard Butler and Jessica Biel

doesn't always guarantee quality.

In these final few moments, Gerard is doing some lovely Scottish or

Irish or whatever soccer-style bonding with his son.

If I'm good enough for them,

I may be good enough for someone here, right?

Kicking a football covered in these dashes.

But cut to just a few seconds later,

the football's now sporting rings!

We don't normally spoil the ending for you,

but with this movie we thought no-one would especially care.

Someone very smart once told me you just have to be there.

Playing For Keeps again

and earlier in the film the lovely

Stacie carries in her groceries.

Note the baguette...

PHONE RINGS

-STACIE:

-Hello.

-He doesn't really hate me?

No, of course he doesn't...

..which disappears...

..and then reappears!

-Stacie could make my baguette re-appear.

-Oh, Clarky!

-STACIE:

-Your son is honest.

Stale, uninspired,

cheap, tacky, and a little bit sickly.

No stars.

Wow, Tom, you're really getting into this film criticism thing.

No, I'm reviewing a Chinese take away I had on Just Eat.

Fantastic chemistry, four stars.

Are you reviewing a film, Ben?

No! I'm reviewing my old chemistry teacher.

He's opened a Chinese restaurant on Just Eat.

Thanks for that, both.

Some films are so terrible that continuity errors even improve them.

Slightly.

Let's have a look at the best of the worst.

A proper clunker here from un-special,

poorly scripted Total Recall.

Yeah, Colin Farrell's stunt double is clearly a woman.

Not quite, Benedict.

That's Lori and look at her hair!

Midway through the fight, her hair-band mysteriously disappears...

..a fact that's totally ruined Total Recall for me.

Colin Farrell is strapped into the futuristic

equivalent of the Central Line, and... aha!

That is not how you spell 'forecast'. It's not! It just isn't!

How's your relationship forecast, Matthew?

Patchy and cold.

OK, look at what new guy Marek's doing here,

and listen to Colin's advice...

Whoa, whoa! Don't hold it like that.

Hold it here.

If you hold it there and it shorts,

one of those bulbs will shoot straight through your hand.

But he flat out doesn't listen to him.

He's carried on doing exactly what he was doing!

God's sake, Marek.

Yeah, get it together, Marek.

I despair of Marek, sometimes. I really do.

What's truly scary about the Scary Movie franchise is that

they've made it to five.

Enough is enough.

OK, now look. Snoop is on Mac Miller's right

throughout the conversation.

-Crazy got to have been there.

-BLEEP.

Except now he's on his left!

I'm surprised they managed to get Snoop to say the sentences in order.

I don't think he was supposed to be in the film, he just turned up.

-SNOOP:

-I don't understand why the shampoo company can't fix that, man.

-Are you going to try out?

-Me?

Kendra's about to show off some of her dancing skills.

But, before that, it's a ventriloquism act.

-Look at her mouth as she says "Oh, food."

-Oh, food!

She's clearly not saying that.

In fact, I'm a certified lip reader.

She's saying, "Oh, gosh, why am I in this terrible, terrible film."

Let me see that certificate.

It's Joe Wright's lacklustre

recent adaptation of Anna Karenina.

Morphine, anyone?

I know this is awful, but that is not the solution.

No, what I meant was, look at the label

on the morphine bottle.

See how it changes?

Here it's 'la morphine', and later it's just 'morphine'!

Why didn't you tell me, for God's sake?

It's the almost laughably bad, must-avoid Taken 2.

Time for a glass of wine!

Here's a bottle and two empty glasses.

-But she's OK, right?

-WOMAN:

-Yeah, she's OK.

Aaand without anyone touching them,

they're now drinking from them.

Scientific proof that Neeson is a boss.

Are you OK?

Domestic issues in the Mills household.

They can't even decide on what time of year it is.

Here Bryan talks of the upcoming fall break.

You're leaving on fall break next week.

This is the only time I can get to do this before I go to Istanbul.

But, a few days later,

Lenore's imminent spring break plans are cancelled.

We had this trip planned to China

for Kim's spring break as a family,

you know, to try and work things out.

I've been banned from attending either break.

In the whole of America?

Very much so.

Come on.

In this car chase, Neeson's got his car all dirty with food.

See the windscreen?

But look! Here - bang!

The dirt's gone.

Go a bit further,

and it's grubby again.

But also, rewind.

If there's one thing that can ruin a high-octane car chase, it's a

middle-aged woman ambling along at the same speed as the car.

This is great.

Here's Neeson, summoning the US Embassy on his sat-nav.

It's a remarkable feat,

given that he arbitrarily hammers away on entirely the wrong keys.

And look, it isn't even a British alphabet!

Never doubt the Neeson.

He does have a very specific set of skills.

You understand me?

Strap yourselves in, folks.

Another classic car chase.

But the taxi they're driving appears to be invincible.

The police car forces it to drive into some corrugated iron.

And we see, later on, some definite damage to the left side.

Move on a few moments, the damage has completely gone!

But wait!

Here's the rear window getting shot out.

-WOMAN:

-Dad!

It's back in the very next shot!

Yep, the car possesses a healing factor,

making some believe it's the love child

of Liam Neeson and Wolverine.

Guys, it's time for GPM.

Gently Petting Matthew?

What? No!

Graphically Probing Matthew?

Absolutely not! My really cool acronym can only mean one thing!

Great Plot-hole Mistakes!

Gaffes so massively bad, an entire film falls apart.

Whoa! Hold on a second, guys! Check us out, we're cartoons!

Amazing. I can finally assist

Pinky and the Brain in their quest for world domination!

No time, Ben. We've got to explore

the miasma of movie mistakes that is...

In this relentless, pacey

and exciting superhero flick,

billionaire genius Tony Stark is

terrorised by Sir Ben Kingsley.

He threatens to bring America to its knees with a painful series

of lessons and no-one, especially Stark and the President, is safe.

So, Stark sets about saving the day.

Fair enough? Fair enough. No!

Not fair enough! Do you know why?

It interferes with Stark's long-planned golfing weekend?

No! Because Tony Stark happens to be in

an incredibly well-known superhero group.

He was in a movie with them.

Where the hell are they?!

Well, some of them don't live on Earth.

Thor might have been back in

Asgard, sorting out some admin.

Admin?! Stark's in grave peril.

And what about the others?

Big, angry Bruce Banner?

That archer guy.

And if the Captain doesn't leap into action

when the American President is threatened, what is his function?

Oh, no!

Maybe they were off on that golfing weekend,

hoping that Stark might pop along at the end?

That's a highly non-valid point!

This is one mistake so deadly that these superheroes couldn't

defeat it, if they bothered to turn up, that is.

All right! Let the Arnie marathon commence!

-And we're filming.

-Oh, yes.

Explain the concept, Tom.

We're going to power through some Arnie classics.

-It's going to be an all-nighter.

-Can't wait.

Yep. And let's try and spot

as many movie mistakes as we can along the way.

-Best night ever!

-Let's start at the very beginning with the low-budget,

creaky but extraordinary Hercules In New York.

Hey-o! It's Arnie's first ever scene on film.

Fun fact - he was billed as Arnold Strong when this came out.

Is the movie mistake his acting?

-WOODENLY:

-I am tired of the same old faces...

No. But hold on, I think I spotted something.

Flick back to the start and check out the brunette behind the throne.

She somehow ends up next to Zeus!

That Arnie. Always getting caught up in mistakes involving women.

-Are you homesick?

-I am having too much fun.

This clunker is as clear as night and day.

I know, right. A pastel blue turtleneck?!

No, Ben. The fact that it constantly changes between night and day.

Also, is that a cameraman-shaped shadow I spot?

I like how the Greek music reminds us Arnie is Greek.

I like how Arnie has the worst on-screen fight

in cinematic history.

Folks...

that's supposed to be a bear.

Time for the thrill-packed Conan The Barbarian.

Classic early '80s action.

If you want to see some classic action with a man in his early '80s,

Arnie's playing Conan in the remake this year.

-Arnie's in his 60's, Tom.

-Don't spoil the moment.

Ha! What a ridiculous scene!

-Huh?

-Those dogs are German shepherds.

-That breed was not created until the 1890s.

-Great point, Matthew.

And in what year did King Osric from the snake cult rule?

It was the Hyborian age,

roughly equivalent to the years 40,000 through to 10,000 BC.

Well before German shepherds.

That lonely childhood and lonely adulthood

hasn't been wasted after all.

Time for Commando!

The greatest, daftest action film ever made.

This just shows you why Arnie's the right man in any crisis.

In order to hide himself, he just rips the seat out.

I spy with my little eye

something beginning with "film crew being reflected on the car".

You never got the rules of I-spy, did you, Tom?

-You're just jealous you don't know what it is.

-Hold on!

Arnie went through all the effort of ripping out the car seat

to be lower down, only to now be sitting up normally.

Great posture, though.

A guy I trusted for years wants me dead.

Understandable. I've known you for five minutes and I want you dead too.

Ha! There aren't any cars in the background.

-They're back!

-This scene's a clunknanza.

Now. Look at Arnie's grenades wobbling about.

They're strapped to him by their pins.

That's less of a movie mistake, more of a life mistake.

As your uncle knows all too well.

Yes! Blow up the factory and the poorly designed dummies!

-Tom, I think the film wanted us to think they were people.

-Wow.

Now we're talking! Time to see Arnie's lighter side

in the quite frankly hilarious Twins!

Yeah. Hilarious for all the wrong reasons.

Those people staring at the camera might as well just wave too.

-Ridonculous.

-No, what's ridonculous is you using that word, Matthew.

Sozzle!

You could be a boxer, I could be your manager.

I don't think I could fight for money...

We've broken through to the other side. Only three more films left!

When I close my eyes all I can see is biceps.

What have we got next, Matthew?

It's time for the awesome action comedy True Lies.

-Action comedy? Is that even a genre?

-It is now.

I spy with my little eye something beginning with...

Yes, we all saw the camera crane reflected in the windscreen.

Spoilsport.

Look at that! They could afford a disappearing car.

Check it out. The car on the right vanishes halfway through the skid.

Nice!

See? You and this car were made for each other.

HE GROANS: Two more Arnie films to go. Come on, boys. We can do this.

Is it bedtime or breakfast time? My body clock's shut down.

Neither. It's time to watch the high-octane masterpiece, Eraser!

Now, those are offshore banking deposits. UBS...

I love that SHE said what UBS stands for,

and the computer screen reads USB.

That's a major one.

I love that we've finally found a movie mistake after watching this

for an hour and 20 minutes.

Well, we did also want to watch it to hear Arnie say,

"You've just been erased."

What a line.

Yeah. We did it! We're at the end of the Arnie marathon,

and we're just about to watch his finest work to date.

The masterful, essential viewing that is...

ALL: Jingle All The Way!

Here's Howard going down the escalator...

But wait! There he is again in the crowd before he gets there!

Classic overachieving Arnie.

Check out that drawing pinned on the wall in the playhouse.

It's completely changed!

-Oh, thank God. I thought I was seeing things.

-Ha-ha.

No, Ben. You've been awake for many hours

and ingested a lot of sugar and alcohol,

but no, you're not seeing things.

Good. Although what's with the directorial decision

to put black dots and swirling colours everywhere?

Whoa, Ben... you should probably drink some water.

Thanks, Turbo Man. I knew you'd save me.

You can always count on me.

Those lights reflected in his helmet show he's actually not outdoors

but in a studio.

Also, how have his wife and kid not noticed

Turbo Man's distinctively huge jaw, or thick Austrian accent?

If Arnie managed to become a politician in real life

then I'm afraid I've got to let those slip.

Oh... Thank you, sir. I don't think you know how much he means to me.

Oh! I think I have an idea.

Oh, my giddy aunt.

We've done it. We survived the marathon!

Oh...! Yes.

Right. Next up, Jean-Claude Van Damme.

I'll have a quick toilet break, and then... "I'll be back."

Who's that supposed to be?

Folks, it's the moment you've all been waiting for!

-It's time for Matthew's Minute Movie Mistakes of 2013.

-Oh, no!

This is literally my least favourite bit.

All three of us love movie mistakes, but I have a particular passion

for minute mistakes - mistakes that's no-one's noticed.

That's cos they're hardly mistakes!

-They're minor mistakes.

-What, mistakes from films about miners?

What, like Armageddon or There Will Be Blood or Billy Elliot?

No! Tiny mistakes. Mistakes that no-one's noticed.

No-one except for me. I'm going to be so popular!

I hate that guy.

It's a massive, massive fight, between a giant robot

and an enormous sea monster. God, I love Pacific Rim.

And I love the mildly obscure mistakes contained within.

Look at this executive toy.

It would not, I assure you, react in this classic manner.

All the balls would swing together.

Gah, you're so pedantic!

I'd say I'm more fastidious than pedantic.

Now, palaeontology fans, listen to this.

..their secondary brain. Now, we both know the Kaiju are so large

they need two brains to move around, like a dinosaur.

I want to get my hands on that.

Ha! Dr Geiszler, your doctorate is worth nothing.

Dinosaurs did not have two brains.

Exactly. Everyone knows they had three brains.

Ben... you don't even have one brain.

What is brain?

But the brain... too much ammonia.

Arthur Christmas.

Brilliant as a cockle-warming family movie, rubbish at geography.

Well, I didn't know Aarhus was in Eastern Denmark.

Exactly. Everybody knows that Aarhus is in Jutland,

which is the western peninsula of Denmark. Admittedly on the east

coast of Jutland,

but at best that puts Aarhus in the middle of the country.

I thought Aarhus was in the middle of our street.

Pitch Perfect? More like Pitch Riddled With Mistakes!

-Ben, you could have had Pitch Imperfect.

-I hate myself.

..Darth Vader's Luke's father...

-Hey. Hey, that girl walked past twice!

-Really?

Yeah. Blonde girl, green top, and blue shorts. Twice.

"Vader" in German MEANS "father". His name is literally Darth Father.

Well, actually I was going to point out in this bit

Beca's wrong.

"Vader" actually means father in Dutch, not German.

That was your movie mistake? Was that not too petty even for you?

Not even close, mate.

Are you guys getting ready for the riff-off?

What the hell is a riff-off?

Cloud Atlas!

Difficult, but rewarding to read - difficult to watch.

Are you ready for a clear but tedious error, boys?

-Nope.

-Not for me.

Good! September the 1st, 1973

was a Saturday. We all know that, don't we?

-Well, you might.

-And maybe Rain Man.

-But the directors certainly don't.

On this barely-seen calendar it's listed as a Friday! Ha! A Friday.

Jog on, Wachowskis!

Back to the very satisfying Skyfall. Perfect Bond.

But check Severine's shoes.

Not only dreadful to walk in on bumpy ground,

they also keep changing colour.

Fun fact, guys. In the shots where we just see her head and shoulders,

-she's actually wearing flippers.

-She's a very talented actor.

This looks suitably grim.

It could only be the dark and moody The Paperboy.

-Oh, dear, look at that drip.

-Oi! Don't talk about Ben like that.

Not that drip, you drips. The drip in the clip! This is set in 1969.

Obviously an IV drip would have been in a glass bottle at that time,

not a plastic bag.

-No wonder this movie tanked.

-Drip.

Seen...

No...

Over the next months

film franchises will be releasing sequels and prequels galore.

I'm looking forward to the prequel Django Chained.

Apparently it's just going to be two gruelling hours

of Jamie Foxx as a slave.

Yeah, there's a lot of buzz about Star Wars Episode VII:

I Just Don't Care Any More.

They're going to film George Lucas

driving around in a gold pick-up truck

full of money, just sneering at his fans.

Well, as great as those two made-up films sound,

I thought we could look at some of the actual film franchises,

and some of the gaffes we hope they won't be making this time round.

Argo II... Argos?

Turtle Power, everyone!

Perhaps the greatest social movement of the 20th century.

And now, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is being

reimagined for the jaded, terrifying youth of 2014.

But we all remember the original film, right? With these clunkers?

Of course! Like Leonardo leaving April's apartment.

His sword pings off the wall like it was made of rubber.

Looking back, this film does actually seem quite terrifying.

Ohhh! So, that's the plan...

Here's a blinding mistake that we hope won't creep into the remake.

As Raphael and Leonardo argue,

a crew member fails to hide out of shot.

He hasn't helped his cause by wearing a bright orange cap.

Guys... that's not a crew member. That's their human slave.

Very dark.

I, Frankenstein's out soon, but let's hope the new film doesn't make

the same mistakes as the definitive dark and still creepy 1931 classic.

Like this doozy! In this epic feat of acting

we can see Frankenstein's monster falling unconscious onto his back.

Top work, Boris.

However, here, he's somehow rolled over!

Give it another 30 seconds I'm sure he'd have started doing the worm.

-..Too late!

-Here, quick. Give me a hand...

Are you ready to have your minds blown, folks?

Here are some high-end special effects

that I, Frankenstein will have to match.

The doctor is in grave danger as he fights his own monster creation.

Or so you'd think. Luckily, the monster spares his life,

and instead throws what is clearly a dummy off the ledge.

-Ben, that was supposed to be the real doctor.

-What?

With their return to our screens in Muppets Most Wanted next year

let's point out a couple of Great Muppet Mistakes.

This first Muppet movie

is criminally underrated comedy genius. It's spot on.

Well, not so much here.

Miss Piggy proves she's a real diva by insisting that any man

who pushes her off a balcony wears a luxurious velvet evening glove.

That's possibly the classiest movie mistake we've ever had.

Afternoon, all...

Now, over here in the still exceptionally funny

The Muppets Take Manhattan, creator Jim Henson makes

a Hitchcock-style cameo, crouching awkwardly under some tables.

Look, there's the top of his head.

Ah. He's just trying to avoid paying the bill.

Textbook evasion technique.

Next year sees the release of Dawn of the Planet of the Apes,

but the original series had its fair share of monkey business.

Here's the reasonably decent but not amazing second film

Beneath the Planet of the Apes.

Turns out the Forbidden Zone isn't forbidden to the

onslaught of coffee shops we see on every high street.

Oh, yeah, look!

Some primate litterbug's left this coffee cup lying around.

Ruining the picturesque landscape.

-Look. There's a queue for this coffee.

-Nearly, Ben.

Look, there's cue marks

showing where James Franciscus should be standing.

Naughty. No-one likes a cue jumper, James.

We're almost at the end, guys.

You've stayed with us for the entire show!

-Or alternatively, they've just tuned in.

-Equally plausible.

We've seen a lot of movies, and a lot of mistakes,

but which movie is the mistakiest?

When it comes to movie mistakes, which film takes the cake?

Yeah. And then switches the hand that's holding the cake...

And then the cake disappears...

And then when it reappears it's a completely different cake?

Let's find out!

It's Les Mis, both a mesmerising and tear-jerking adaptation

of the musical, and a clanger-fest.

# It's win-win! #

Here these officials take off their hats

as Valjean is being captured, as ever.

So how come THIS fellow happens to still be wearing his?

As Mr Miyagi once said, "Hats on, hats off." Almost.

Ah, the "Fantine teleports around

"a group of disgruntled factory workers" scene.

That's rarely performed in the West End.

Look! She's got different neighbours in every shot.

Jowly Mc-Scowl-a-Lot's on Hathaway's right...

and then she's at the end of the line!

Poor Fantine has been convinced to be a prostitute.

In order to win some business from this captain,

she's hidden her shawl somewhere about her person

and then made it... come back again.

I think it's fair to say Anne "Hathaway" with continuity errors.

Incredible.

Heck of a blooper now. Here's Enjolras, pamphlets in hand.

-But wait, pause that! Where have the pamphlets gone?

-No, Matthew!

He's clearly thrown them in the air, and a few moments later

-caught them.

-There's no better way to rouse a crowd

than with a bit of juggling.

The boys are up to their old tricks here.

Chivalrous Enjorlas, in his splendid red coat, is picking up Eponine.

He's not chivalrous enough to carry her away, though.

he's clearly chucked her to his mate.

-Shut up, that's teamwork.

-Implausible, badly-edited teamwork.

Ah, young Gavroche. So tragically killed.

Such a young talent. What a waste.

Don't worry, Ben, they didn't really kill him.

-Oh.

-Look. Do you see his wide-open eyes?

Now they're closed.

-And now they're open.

-It's a miracle.

-Huzzah!

This scene is great and all, but you know what it could do with?

A bit of furniture.

What? Like this?

Where did that wardrobe come from?

-Much better. Thank you, Tom.

-"Mon pleasure."

With seven classic clangers,

Les Mis takes the crown for most mistakes this year!

So we've come to the end of our movie mistakes marathon.

It's been less physically challenging than a real marathon

but in many ways a lot more gruelling.

If you've made it to the end, we salute you.

And if you've just tuned in,

don't worry, this gets repeated all the time.

Yeah, seriously! All the time.

It's basically this and Family Guy.

But the movie industry waits for no man. Even as we speak

more films are being made, with more calamitous clunkers.

-Does that mean...?

-Yes, Ben.

It's time to start researching next year's Movie Mistakes.

ALL: To the cinema!

MUSIC: "Don't You Forget About Me" by Simple Minds

# Hey, hey, hey, hey

# Ooh ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh whoa

# Don't you

# Forget about me

# Don't, don't, don't, don't

# Don't you

# Forget about me

# La, la-la-la-laa... #

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd