02/05/2017 The One Show

Hello, everyone! Welcome to The One Show with Alex Jones. And Matt

Baker. In the last couple of weeks, we have had some of the biggest

names from the biggest Hollywood films on the show. From John Boyega

and Orlando Bloom. To Kurt Russell, Chris Pratt and Woody Harrelson last

night. But this evening, we have the stars of no less than five Hollywood

blockbusters on the show. We are talking Dirty Dancing. We are

talking Rocky. Ghostbusters! Also Jaws and Star Wars. OK, it is their

version of the blockbusters, but we are excited nonetheless. Please

welcome Keith Lemon. And Paddy McGuinness!

Yes, me! We haven't got lots of extra audience, so extra topping is

good. Extra years -- eight years in the making, this product. Has it

been worth the wait? It has. We were told to keep this bit brief, so yes.

They said we could talk about more stuff later. Yes! How did you two

become friends? You have known each other for ages. We met on a Channel

4 music show about ten years ago, hosted by Steve Jones, called

Transmission. Sun you have a good memory. We really are in love. You

meet people within the industry and get on with them, but sometimes you

really get on with someone. We have a common love of alcohol. And film.

And it blossomed from there. We have been friends ever since. Yes. The

section where you can talk about it is coming up shortly. That light is

not bright enough. It is not bouncing off my head enough. Turn it

up a bit more. I looked at myself on the monitor like someone in the

audience, where they are looking up on Top Of The Pops. We will tweak

the lighting for you. I like your accent. Thanks! I like yours, Matt.

You are all Southerners to me. One thing bound to wipe the smile off

our faces here is the thought of having to reset a driving test.

There are new rules for the driving test coming to play later this year,

so we asked viewers Gordon and Lili Herbert, who are with us tonight, to

take large sections of their driving tests again for us. And they were

not happy. Anyone who has taken their driving

test will remember countless hours behind the wheel, perfecting that

dreaded reverse around the corner or the tricky 3-point turn. But that is

all set to change. The driver and vehicle standards agency have just

announced big modifications to future tests. They are bringing in

more of those modern everyday challenges that we face on our

roads. To help me test drive these new changes, we have drafted in the

help of father and daughter team Gordon and Lili Herbert. My dad is a

good driver. I don't know how you will do those manoeuvres with your

bad habits. 17-year-old Lili passed her test a few months ago with the

help of driving lessons from dad Gordon, who passed his test 25 years

ago. She drives too close to the car in front and breaks to last-minute

sometimes. So what are the changes to the driving test about? First,

the learner driver will be expected to independently drive for 20

minutes. That is twice as long as in the current test. Next, they will

have to follow directions from a sat-nav rather than road signs. At

the end of the road, turn right. Manoeuvres such as reversing around

the corner will be replaced with more real-life scenarios, like

pulling into and reversing out of a parking bay. Finally, drivers will

be expected to safely demonstrate everyday skills while on the move,

like turning on their rear hitters or washing the windscreen. The

experts say all of this gives new drivers the skills to manage

modern-day distractions and improve road safety. It focuses on the high

risk area where most young people have their crashes, so they don't

crash so much inside roads, doing slow manoeuvres. We watch how they

can cope with major roundabouts, changing lanes, turning right across

traffic. This is as if you are doing a journey with someone watching you

drive. It is far more relaxed and far more real-life. That is the

theory, but how will it work in practice? Remember Gordon and Lili?

We asked them to try out the new changes in a special One Show

driving test. And our on-board cameras give us the chance to review

their skills afterwards. Right, you two? Want to find out how you did?

Better not lose. I will lose face. Lili is first behind the wheel. I

will be your assessor. I'm Rebecca. The reverse was a bit stiff. First

up, the sat-nav test. Follow the road to 300 yards. Remember, Lili

passed her test dummy four months ago and it didn't involve using a

sat-nav. Just have a look and work it out and see whether you get it

right. As I pulled out, it didn't pick up the entrance I was coming

out of. So it was the sat-nav's fault? As for turn right. I did OK.

Time for that new safety element of the test for Lili. Show me how you

would turn on the rear demister. You did well. But is the parking smooth?

I checked my mirrors, but I don't think I did it enough. And reverse

back out again, please. I probably didn't do so good on that. How long

have you been parking and reversing for? 30 years. Probably my worst

habit. At the end of both tests, what do our drivers think? It is

harder to use a sat-nav. Some of the easier manoeuvres have been taken

out, but definitely a better test. It is easier because it is more

relaxed. I think it is for the better. Time for the results. The

good news is, you both got your safety question correct. You both

know how to put on the heated rear windows, so well done. When it comes

to the parking and reversing, Lili, you failed. And Gordon, you failed

as well. But the independent driving/ sat-nav element, Gordon,

you passed. Lili, you failed that as well. I am not surprised! But you

are a lot older, with more experience. So it seems experience

won the day. So who is going to be driving? You drive, I will do the

sat-nav. Give them a round of applause! Unlucky for Lili, but you

both keep your licenses. Keith, you are interested. She looks nice. She

looked nice in the VT and in real life. Have you been on holiday? A

fake one, yeah. Nice colour, like a hot dog in a denim jacket. I like

hotdogs. I like your eyebrows. This is what he is like. Sorry. You were

interested in this. You asked when the new changes are coming in. They

come into effect on December four, 2017. Until then, the practical test

remains the same, but after that, we have these new changes. So people

will be rushing to pass that test. It is a big deal, because they

haven't made major changes before now. This is the most significant

change to the practical test in living memory. One change they made

was that you no longer had to start the car with the starting handle.

That is how far back it goes. The time when cars didn't have electric

starters, you have to demonstrate that you could start the car. And as

those cars were phased out, they dropped that from the test. The only

other significant change was in 1975, when they removed hand signals

from the test, although they are still in the Highway code. Isn't

that still important? So now you have to use a sat-nav? I think they

are dumbing it down. Young people watching the show now, I am going to

amaze the younger audience here now. Back in the day when I had a test at

school, we didn't use calculators. I can hear the Xbox dropping. You have

to use this thing called your brain back in the day. Now, you go into an

exam and the kids have calculators and iPads. Just learn it! Do you

think it is a sad indictment of the way society is going? I wouldn't go

that far. You like a hand signal, Keith. He does!

Like when you slow down and stick your hand out of the window. If they

have occurred on the back, it is important. When have you ever got a

trailer on the back? Keith, tell us about your first car.

Seamless, Matt! That is why you get the big bucks. In Keith and Paddy's

new show, they recreate their favourite characters from famous

movies. Before we see some of their interpretations... My first car was

black. It was a mini. I remember having a driving lesson with my

friend and his odd character was giving me the lesson. He was

laughing so much that he put a cardboard box on his head. I

couldn't tell what he was saying. That is true. I passed the second

time. That was an interesting story, wasn't it? Before we see some of

your interpretations, let's look at what the people of Britain did with

their interpretations. Here's looking at you, kid. Hollywood has

delivered countless iconic and memorable lines, words that started

off on the pages of a script that have become part of our everyday

conversations. But what are our most memorable lines? I would go with the

Wizard of Oz and there's no place like home. There's no place like

home. I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love

her. Get to the chapel now! To infinity and beyond. This is Sparta!

That was great delivery! Do you know 300? Brett, what shall I do?

Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn. Have you ever said it? Yeah,

to him! One of my favourites is some like it hot. It's the last line in

the movie. You don't understand! I'm a man! Well, nobody's perfect.

Brilliant. She's at the door. Never let go. I will never let go, Jack.

Jack, I will never let go! Have you got a favourite one-liner from a

movie? Yes. From the movie Dirty Dancing. Nobody puts Baby in the

corner. Look what you've got here. I heard you want to stay in the

jungle. I can fix it for you. I will do anything to stay in the jungle.

# I'm the king of the swingers, the jungle VIP.

# I've reached the stock and had to stop and that's what's bothering me.

# I want to be like you. # You see it's true!

# And eight like me! APPLAUSE

Sterling performances. We did the Dirty Dancing lift on the

night of our wedding but I did not tell my husband and I ran and he was

holding a glass. What did he think he was lifting? You have done the

lift. You have the Keith Paddy Picture Show and you have really

made some of your favourite films. I thought he would ruin Dirty Dancing

because it is one of my favourites but I think you sort of made it

better. Paddy, you are getting to play

Patrick Swayze's role. How did you prepare? I watched the film and

studied him closely and I noticed he shakes his head a lot. That's my

cousin and his partner, they are the professional dancers. They look

great together. That is genius. The beer drinking

goes to another level. Dirty Dancing is a classic. We have all watched

it. When you watch them back when we wondered which films to do,

literally he is very angry. All of this drinking quickly and shaking

his head. She is just trying to help them. There we go. It is hilarious.

It really is. It is done with such affection. That is what brought us

together, that film because we did it on Let's Dance for Comic Relief.

We did the whole dance and rehearsed for days and I did not like it. And

I said, how come we have not done a show together? Rewrote a half-hour

version of Dirty Dancing and none of that script is in this one. Our

references were old. It was eight years ago. It took that long to get

together and do it. When we were on set at Pinewood, like James Bond,

and Star Wars, it was like... We love films. We are so passionate. It

was amazing to be involved. We kept saying, hey, we are doing Rocky. I

do not have a favourable one of my favourite films was Return Of The

Jedi. . When I did it on the set of the Ewok village, I cried. Light

sabre fighting. Did you do their bit by bit, were you jumping around the

scenes? We have the films on our phones and did it as closely as we

could. His American accent is amazing. It will blow you away. He

is doing it now! I quickly discovered I am claustrophobic. Have

you ever worn a prosthetic? Once they are armed, they are on. I have

some on now. He loves them. He cannot get enough of it. There is

something not right. It is exciting. What is exciting about not being

able to breathe? They put the prostatic summary and three hours I

was in make up and I went to the toilet and someone came up to me and

said, are you all right? I scratched my face, I had it on, I could not

feel my skin, I panicked. Three hours, I ripped it off. I walked

back in and they said, are you all right? Then I got worse. Even

dressing up as C-3PO, it freaked me out. You said, I am going to do this

with my arms but the suit only enable you to do this with your

arms. It was grim. It was worth it. It is hysterical. The people you

have involved did it. We purposely went for people like Stephen

Tomkinson, Anna Friel, who you do not see doing these kinds of things.

Actors? Proper actors. Stephen Tomkinson came on in Jaws and would

do long monologues. What was he in Jaws? Not these sharks? I am the

shark. I like not being able to breed. He loves it. From this

Saturday there is one every week? Dirty Dancing this week and I think

Ghostbusters next week. With Robbie Williams. I have seen the Dirty

Dancing one, it is hilarious. I cannot wait to see the rest. For

anyone decorating at the weekend, they will relate to this. At a David

Hockaday exhibition at Tate Britain, a woman took a colour swatch so she

could identify the exact shade of blue. It was not just blue, it was

between Pearl Ashes and Jazz Cafe blue.

Paint colours, no longer can you walk into a shop and simply ask for

blue pain. Our macro one brand there are over 150 name combinations for

blue, such as lunar landscape, even cuddled. Is it a marketing field

day? I am about to paint the town red and find out what people think.

Do paint colours annoy you? They are ridiculous, they do not look like

anything they are called. What is this? Pink. Ross breed. Pink Lady. .

It is a pink colour. I don't know about that. Who comes

up with these names and how do they do it? Research suggests the

elaborate colour naming started with these crayons, who in 1903 released

a box of standard colour names. By 1949, they had a host of new names

including Thistle, Cornflour. We are at one of the fastest-growing paint

companies in the UK who provide paid to for London red buses and also

produced paint for homes. Their HQ is in Reading where their colour

boffins create colours and more importantly named them. We have just

under 2000 here. 2000. Some of the names are flamboyant. They are and

that is part of what we wanted, to create names people would look at

and it would make them laugh, or say they do not like that, any emotional

connection to the colours that will encourage them to spend more time

looking at colours, thinking about what this could mean to them in

their homes and we worked hard to ensure we have lovely and exciting

names. How do you go about finding a name? It took a group of us a long

time, for a few weeks we carried notebooks and wrote down ideas

around what we saw outside, writing down saying is that people like. We

had a colour expert allocate the right names to the right colours. It

was fun and a lot of the names have great meanings. Jane and the team

can create any colour paint you desire as long as you have an

example, by scanning it through the system and finding big correct

pigment to mix. I have my colour, this green notebook. I will give it

to James to create the paint. The thing that is missing is the perfect

name. Mark Wentworth has studied colour for almost 30 years and is

practising as a colour specialists. It is about evoking emotions. The

descriptive words have to evocation really or image in some on's mind.

Yellow, for me, was like the caffeine of the spectrum so you

would not name something Lullaby Yellow. Whether it is to keep

attention, ignite imagination, paint names have a purpose. This is

Angelica's Paradise. What do you reckon? I will leave it to the

experts. We want you to come up... The fun

continues. It is your fault Alex. You want us to do this and we do not

know what we are talking about. Colours. In the film a man said to

come up with the perfect name you have to be in tune with what you can

imagine and what the colour makes you feel. With that in mind that

that -- with that in mind... . Is this man married? Let's carry on.

Look at the first. We have gone through the keyhole! Days? What name

would you give this colour? Derek. It is saying Derek to me. Is it

brown? Is this a trick question? It is brown, isn't it? Elephante. I

don't know what they want. I would class that as cream. It is grey.

That is never great. It is grey! It is called Dead Salmon. I can see

that. I swear to god... I almost swore on live television men. Who

doesn't want Dead Salmon all over your walls? Let's go to the orange

colour. Liver. That is definitely David Dickinson. Almost right.

Really? It is Keith's Tan. That is according to the company that did

the paint. They made it especially for you. Keith's Tan.

APPLAUSE And so that you do not feel left

out, Paddy. Let The Paint See The Pot. If you were to paint that at

home, can you paint a picture of your house at home? You go through

so many keyholes. I would say it is quite neutral, so that I can add

jazzy things that do not look out of place that might be brightly

coloured. At the moment I have a painting in my whole way done by

Robbie Williams of Ken Livingstone. It is not a joke. You asked me a

question. But it has a swear word. It says no SHRIEKS you, Ken. I had

to tell Robbie I stuck a sticker on the painting. Because young people

come to the house, I had to put no fun, Ken. Take Me Out, there was

another wedding. Congratulations to Beckie and Adam.

APPLAUSE There have been six weddings. Did

you go? No. That is all we have time for. I tell you what I am excited

about, Blind Date is coming back. Paul O'Grady. I am glad he is doing

it. If it were anyone else, it would not have worked. We have to thank

you. APPLAUSE

. 9:15pm. Tomorrow I'll be back with I'll be

joined by Max Beasley