Tattoo 4 O'Clock Club

# Where do you go when you know nobody can understand you?

# When it's just too much to handle?

# What do you do when you end up somewhere you never planned to?

# Washed out, stressed out like it was shampoo

# You should stay It can change

# There's good days and bad days

# But one day down the line this time is sure to stop

# So the only time is now 4 O'Clock

# 4 O'Clock, 4 O'Clock, 4 O'Clock. #

-Hey, Owen.

-Hi.

Thanks for inviting us to your party last night.

OK, a few things.

One, I didn't actually invite you. You just...

You just showed up.

Two, a home invasion, it isn't technically a party.

And three...

Oh, yeah, the tattoos.

You should've washed that off. You might get into trouble.

It won't come off.

Fleur and Eli's have come off.

You said they only lasted for three hours.

Oh, yeah. I always gets my hours and days mixed up.

Three days?!

We can't have these on for three days.

It's a major uniform infringement.

We'll get excluded for sure.

Ice it, spod-job, it's Friday.

We've just got to get through today.

You keep that in there, me and Eli will

keep our hands in our pockets and no-one has got nowt to worry about.

See, Owen? We're all fine.

THEY COUGH

-SHE SIGHS

-Oh.

-Oh.

SHE LAUGHS

I thought we were broke. How can we give everyone tablets?

Because a certain acting head

managed to source a job lot from abroad.

They carry a few adverts...

..and we harvest and sell the students' data, so, really,

they pay for themselves.

-It's a racket.

-It's not a racket.

This is going to transform our delivery of education.

-And make you look good?

-And...

Battle of the bands.

I'd love to see people whacking each other with guitars.

It's not a fight, it's a competition.

Like a dog show, but for bands.

Could we win some dog biscuits?

Let's form a band.

The first round's tonight, Darnesh. That doesn't give us a lot of time.

And there ain't no way I'm entering anyways.

Can you imagine the kind of hopeless wannabes they get?

Oh, no, don't tell me YOU'RE entering battle of the bands.

How will I win against a screeching clump of swamp pixies?

-Ah, what did I tell you?

-Mm-hm.

-Wannabes.

Shut your voice hole, Spamber. We're, like, totes amazoid.

I've got a whatev' attitude and my lyrics are, like,

completely shut up.

SHE EXHALES SHARPLY That does sound good.

It's almost worth entering just to beat you.

Go on, dare you.

You ain't got the talent to play music on a thing.

Oh, ain't we? We'll see, shall we?

Amber, no.

Ah!

PHONE CHIMES

There. We're in.

You still competing for a beating?

As if. That's us there.

See you later, loser cruisers.

I can't keep this here all day.

She's right, we are all doomed.

If any one of us is caught,

they're bound to notice the rest of us acting suspiciously.

HE CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY

Like that, you mean.

Morning, Evan. Ah!

Are you OK?

-I'm fine.

-Oh. I'm so sorry.

I didn't know where else to put these.

-No, no, no.

-Oh, thank you.

-Are you...?

Are you moving in?

My car's kaput and I've just been thrown out my flat this morning.

If I don't find somewhere today

I'll have to move back in with my mum and dad.

Can you think of anything more tragic?

Erm, I live with my mum and dad.

Of course you do! I just meant...for me.

For me it would be bad because...

Because I... Well...

Ah!

This is not a storage room, Mr Boyd.

Find somewhere more appropriate for your junk.

Sorry, Crispin, it's my junk.

Oh. Oh, your...

Well...

I hope I haven't broken anything.

Silly me.

Are you in some sort of trouble?

No, I'm fine. It's just...

She's lost her flat.

Oh. That's terrible.

I was homeless for a while.

Fortunately, Dexter, another teacher here, took me in.

Oh, well, no such luck for me, I'm afraid.

# Maddie is homeless I'm far from upset

# She'll need somewhere to chill and rest her head

# A place to call home

# But here's the big thing

# I don't mind taking her under my wing

# She could be my lodger

# I'll grant her a key

# Then I'll be a hero

# How happy she'll be

# If I provide shelter

# A port in a storm

# She'll be all wrapped up, cosy and warm

# Me and Maddie

# Opportunities are endless

# Laughing at my jokes

# No stress Just bliss

# And who knows, maybe...

# Don't go there

# But us two together are a right pair

# I'll be a saviour

# And this is the hero song

# When things go wrong

# I'll her port in the storm

# Under pressure

# A storm is brewing

# Need to get back on my feet

# Keep moving

# Act like a normal person

# My parents are so concerned for me

# Since I came out of the army

# They think I can't take care of me

# But I survive with scraps to eat

# Yet I can't get a flat to rent

# Maybe I should make an offer to move her in

# But I can feel my heart trembling

# With fear of rejection

# I could get tongue-tied and mess up the question

# Er, do you want, like, moving in here?

# That would be embarrassing in front of the rabble

# No, I'd rather not get myself in trouble

# I'll write a note to show I'm hospitable

# Sign it CB and put it in her pigeonhole. #

Leaving a love letter, Crispin?

Don't you have somewhere sweaty to be?

Nah, some kid cracked their head on a pommel horse

so I nipped back for a snack.

You do realise that injury supervision is part

of your responsibility, don't you, Graham?

HE LAUGHS Yeah, right.

Perhaps you should drive the student to a hospital

before you end up on a disciplinary.

Of course, yes, the hospital. That...

I was just coming back to get my keys.

Perhaps you could also pass on Ms Harper's I-tablet

as you hurry back to the gym.

But I'm coaching a five-a-side lot.

Right, sorted.

Well, there must be something in here that will take off a tattoo.

What about this?

No-one's putting toilet cleaner on my face.

Oi.

What are you lot doing in here?

OK, I get it, unwanted tattoo, I've been there.

Leave this to me.

Can't I pick it up after school?

OK, I'll...

I'll get a taxi and come straight over.

Ah, Maddie. I...

..put something in your pigeonhole.

Oh... Yes...

Thanks, I got it.

And what do you think?

Uh, well...

..will there be room for my files, my photos and music?

-Oh, don't worry, there's plenty of room for all your stuff.

-Right.

Well...

..I guess it's probably going to work out just fine then.

Fantastic.

Well, why don't we rendezvous at the end of the day

and I'll get you set up.

Um... Yeah. OK.

Thanks, Crispin.

Oh.

We can borrow some instruments from the music department.

-Instruments we don't know how to play, you mean?

-Relax.

We just need a beat.

I'll do some bars, CJ's the hype man...

And I'll be the dancer.

Can I wear a cape?

Of course not, it'll look stupid.

Stupidly brilliant.

Look, this ain't the X Factor.

We don't have to be amazing, we just have to beat Ingrid

and her stupid little teenyboppers.

ROCK BAND PLAYING

SHE SINGS

They're well good.

What are we going to do?

We could chicken out.

We ain't chickening out.

Yeah, Darnesh, we've got no song, no talent and no instruments,

obviously we're going to go through with this.

CJ.

-What?

-We need music.

-I've got music.

SMOOTH RAP MUSIC PLAYS

-Wow, this is really good.

-Yeah, this is great.

I found it behind the radiator in the flat.

Natty C? Who's that?

Oh, this is Nero's cousin.

He used to live there before you.

He never made it as a rapper. He ended up as a schoolteacher.

That is the saddest thing that I've ever heard.

Which means no-one will have heard it.

We could pass it off as ours.

Yeah, but we need an instrumental version to rap along to.

We'll get Mr Boyd to do it. He's well into music.

And how are we going to do that?

What are you four doing out of class?

See me later in detention.

Job done.

And there we go. Totally fixed.

That's such a relief. You've no idea.

It's OK. I've seen people do it on the telly.

It's easier than you'd think.

They make TV shows about washing off transfers?

No, fixing tattoos.

No more skull and crossbones.

SHE GASPS

# What's worse than a skull and crossbones on your face?

# A massive skull moth

# That leaves a foul taste in my mouth

# I hate moths

# They flap round with no spatial awareness

# Now there's one on my face

# I'm going to get expelled for being so careless

# This evil looking thing's going to mess up my life

# Uniform code's a shirt, a skirt, a tie

# Not a dirty big moth

# That's impossible to hide

# I'll get away with it on a whim

# Who am I kidding?

# My future's in the bin

# It's like this whole year my luck's running thin

# It really feels like the walls are closing in

# Walls closing in Walls closing in

# Walls closing in I feel them closing

# Walls closing in like a booby trap

# How will I escape from that?

# School is very clear

# Rules are for order

# Or else we'd have chaos, riots and raucous

# Inside these walls we obey the code

# The law of the school, what the teacher says goes

# I want to be good

# I've tried to behave

# But it always goes wrong when I step in this place

# I'm stuck, there's no way out No way to break through

# The booby trap gets worse, it all leads to doom

# Walls closing in Walls closing in

# Walls closing in I feel them closing

# Walls closing in like a booby trap

# Time that I escape from that. #

Where are you going?

-Oh!

-That's not good.

I've got a skull moth on my face.

What would you suggest?

Well, truancy is never the answer.

You can't just run away at the first sign of trouble.

-Nunn's coming.

-Oh, run away, run away.

Oi, you lot!

Oh, forget it.

KNOCK ON DOOR

Can I have a quick word?

I've been working on my lesson plan for hours.

But I think the spellchecker has translated it into Korean.

-HE SIGHS

-There may be the occasional

unwanted translation or unscheduled reboot,

but these tablets really were a very good deal.

-Plus, I can see where every student is at any time.

-Ah.

And at the moment...

-TABLET BEEPS RAPIDLY

-..five of them are playing truant.

See?

They'll get quite the surprise when I catch them.

-TABLET:

-Files deleting.

No, no, no, no! No, no, no, no!

Ah!

File deleted.

Thank you.

There you go. Everything's better with chips.

How about getting expelled?

Well, you might need some mushy peas then.

What am I going to do?

It's like every day it seems to get worse.

You could put a bag over your head.

You know, before I met you lot, putting a bag over my head

never seemed to be a solution to any of my problems.

See you later.

Ah... What are you lot doing out here?

Hey!

-Scarper!

-Oi, Eleesh, leave it!

TABLET BEEPS RAPIDLY

At least I've got one of you.

-Gotcha!

-Ah!

Oh, I'm so sorry. I...

It's just my training.

I didn't think it was...

No, no, no, no. It's my fault.

I thought I was jumping out on a student.

Oh.

Right, well, that's one decision made. You are not bunking off.

Yeah, I'll get you a bag.

I'm not wearing a bag. I'll just hide behind the book.

Yeah, just one problem with that.

HE BLOWS WHISTLE

Right, my favourite lesson of the year.

Boys versus girls hockey.

Boys, say goodbye to your shins.

I'm so looking forward to this.

Right, get on with it.

HE BLOWS WHISTLE

HE BLOWS WHISTLE Spread out!

HE BLOWS WHISTLE

You're supposed to actually score a goal before you celebrate it.

Come here.

Ah, my chin!

Grant, what are you doing, you numpty?

Keep back, sir. Just give them some air.

Oh! Oh, this is bad.

She needs to sit out for the rest of the match with an ice pack on this.

Oh, no, no.

Adequate care of injuries is my responsibility.

I'll have to take her to the hospital.

What? No, no. I'll just...

I'm not getting a disciplinary cos of your face, Morgan.

-On your feet.

-Sir, I can handle this.

Good, then you're coming too.

BELL RINGS

Hi, Mum. I can't find anywhere at short notice.

I just wondered if I could stay at yours for a few days.

Uh, hang on. I'll call you back.

Where's my stuff?

Oh, no. Ladies' things.

What are you doing?

If you wanted me to move it, you could have just asked.

I thought we'd agreed that I'd get you set up.

You know, in the flat.

You've got me somewhere to live?

Well, yes. We discussed it earlier. I...

..put something in your pigeonhole.

Oh, wow. Really? I'm so sorry.

I thought you were talking about the tablet.

Thanks, Crispin. You're a life-saver.

-Well, jump in.

-Thanks.

Oh. That fell out as well. I don't know what it is.

OK, so today we're going to be talking about what makes us angry.

When I throw you the ball, just say

-the first thing that just pops...

-Music!

I think I could talk about my disruptive tendencies

much better through the gift of music.

-Yeah, yeah.

-That's a really good idea.

Hmm.

BEAT PLAYS

I think put the bass a little bit higher.

That's amazing, sir.

I really think you're getting through to us.

I can feel my disruptive tendencies just floating away.

This is great. I am so glad we did this.

And as you've recorded it for us, sir,

we can listen to it for homework.

Well, I guess.

-It's all on here.

-Brilliant. Thanks, sir.

It's not bad at all.

My own flat.

Maybe you can come round later when I've unpacked.

DOOR OPENS OK. Yeah, bye.

-I think that's the last of it.

-Oh, fantastic.

You don't know how much this means.

I'm just happy to help.

HE PANTS Um...don't you need to...?

Need to what?

Oh, how about a cup of tea?

Uh, sure. Yeah, I'll pop the kettle on.

Dr Mackay to ward seven.

Right, that's it, I'm getting crisps.

Now's our chance, we could make a break for it.

That won't work. We'll just get busted on Monday.

What if you leg it and we tell Nunn that the doctor took you?

You could come back with all bandages on your face.

You know, that might work.

Yeah, one tiny flaw with that plan,

we haven't got any bandages.

Ah, leave that to me. Come on.

Now we're burgling a hospital, great.

The thing is, the guy who set me up with the flat,

he's still here.

Yeah... He doesn't seem to want to go.

Maybe come round mine tomorrow instead.

It's getting late now.

Really, really late.

-Anyone interesting?

-Just my mum.

-Ah.

Well, I guess I better start unpacking.

Oh, leave all that for now.

You must be starving.

-Let me knock you up an omelette.

-What?

No, no, don't... Don't go to any trouble.

No trouble at all. You just make yourself at home.

Go, go, go.

Right. Eggs, eggs, eggs, eggs.

# Whip them up all nice and fluffy. #

# Ooh-ooh-ooh Ooh-ooh-ooh

# Ooh-ooh-ooh. #

We've got this down. We're going to own this competition.

You know what?

For once, I think something actually might work out.

Oh, my cheese. You actually turned up.

You must love being made to look like a total thing

in front of a huge crowd of everyone.

Whatever, Ingrid.

Suck it up. We're going to wipe the floor with your stupid band.

Yeah? Well, I'm going to wipe my face with your whatever.

Slurp THAT up.

Whatever, loser.

-Yeah, loser.

-Loser.

Erm, guys. Guys!

We might have a slight problem.

"Judged by Natty C."

He's one of the judges?

Well, we can't do the song. He's going to know we ripped it off.

What are we going to do?

Chill, people.

I've been spitting some sweet rhymes and banging tunes back at my crib.

I got this.

MUSIC PLAYS

# We got entry but hard up on time

# Give us a beat, we'll knock 'em down with a rhyme

# My keyboard skills are a little bit of bass

# We'll smash this competition, blast Ingrid to space

# Yeah, we can do this freestyle on the tune

# Harmonies from Violet

# We'll launch to the moon

# We've got CJ as a hype man too

# I guess you could say that there's nothing to lose.

# We have liftoff Space jam

# Like how this is sounding Space jam

# Get this party bouncing Space jam

# Improv is the sound of it Space jam

# We have liftoff Space jam

# I like how this is sounding Space jam

# We'll get this party bouncing Space jam

# Our win will be resounding Space jam

# We've got this locked

# Ingrid can't bother this

# Strap her in a shuttle

# Shaped like an omelette

# Blast her to space

# She'll stay hovering

# Look down at us with great astonishment

# Watch me spitting bars

# We'll get this party kicked off

# Accelerate to Mars

# We're hyper-galactic

# Mega fantastic

# Supercalifragi

# All of that

# In the space-time continuum

# We continue our legacy of being the best that we'll ever be

# Funky robots cover every angle

# Blast competition into a black hole

# We're the rapping androids

# Humanoids

# We've got the skills to fill the void

# Space jam for all the girls and boys

# Put your hands in the air

# Make some noise

# We have liftoff Space jam

# Like how this is sounding Space jam

# Get this party bouncing Space jam

# Improv is the sound of it Space jam

# We have liftoff Space jam

# I like how this is sounding Space jam

# Get this party bouncing Space jam

# Our win will be resounding Space jam. #

HE PLAYS ONE NOTE # Spacey jam

# We've got some robot ham

# Spacey jam

# Something, something

# In a pram. #

We're so dead.

Unbelievable. Not a single bandage to steal in this entire hospital.

What is the NHS coming to?

Maybe you should put in a complaint.

That is a great idea. I need a pen.

What are you doing here? This area's out of bounds.

Uh... Sorry. I think we've just gotten lost.

Who's we?

-That was close.

-I'll close the blind.

-Will you lookie here.

-I don't think she saw us.

I think we've found what we're looking for.

ROCK MUSIC PLAYS

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

OK, we can do this. I know we can do this.

Are you sure?

Are you sure we can do this?

We've come this far, we ain't going to give up. This is our moment.

You with me?

That was the unnecessarily abrasive Oojah.

And now, put your hands together for our next act,

from Elmsmere School, it's...

-We're splitting up the band!

-I hear you, sister!

Right. Well...look at the time.

I suppose I ought to go to bed then.

I suppose. Busy day tomorrow.

Yes.

Right, well, I'll do these dishes.

DISHES CLATTER

WATER RUNS

Just thought I'd say goodnight. Time to get my head down too.

Brilliant. I mean, great.

I mean, thanks for everything you've done.

This is going to work out great.

Do you know what? I really think it is.

-Goodnight, Maddie.

-Night.

DOOR CLOSES, SHE SIGHS

HE CLEARS THROAT

Oh, have they finished with her yet?

I'm afraid it was worse than we...we thought.

Wow. Well, as long as my backside's covered, that's all I care about.

If I never see the inside of this hospital

or any of you lot ever again, it'll be a happy day.

Right, just might make the second half.

I can't believe we actually got away with that.

MUFFLED: Whoa!

What?

SHE SIGHS

SHE GASPS, HE SCREAMS

Like I said, it's just my training.

Oh, you've just got a little...

Detention.

# Can't live with 'em

# And you can't kick 'em out

# When they're up they rub it in your face

# Kick you when you're down

# But what no-one understands them

# You know what they're on about

# Always gonna be around

# Gotta find a common ground

# If you know so much about me

# Where do I go from here?

# If you see 'em every day

# You can never get away

# Only time that you're the boss? 4 o'clock. #