Hair Today Bear Behaving Badly


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LineFromTo

-GROWLING

-Nev... Nev, give me the duck!

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-No, no, no, no!

-It'll be fine!

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No, n-yee-o!

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I know he's your favourite toy,

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but he needs a wash.

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Grrrr!

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Right, you've asked for it!

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Ooh-hoo-hoo! Ah-ha-ha-ha!

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Tickling works every time!

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-DUCK QUACKS

-Snuggly Ducky Duck-Duck!

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Nev... But look at him. He's filthy.

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One wash. I'll get him back as good as new.

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Trust me. It'll be fine.

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-NEV TUTS

-OK, Barney.

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WASHING MACHINE WHIRRS

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Any post for me, any post?

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Oh, hello, Mr Prank. It's nice to see you too.

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Any post for me?

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Oh, oh, oh... Let me see.

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Um...right. Um... Um...

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-Oh, come on!

-Oh. Well, there's this.

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Ah! Yeah... That's a bill.

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-Anything else?

-Oh. Um, um... Yes.

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-There's this.

-Aw. Great(!)

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Another letter from my secret admirer.

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Yes, yes... Read it later, that's probably a very good idea.

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Yeah. Anything else?

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Anything else? Um... Let me see. Oh, yeah. There's this.

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Aaaaaa! Mwah! It's here! It's finally here!

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Ah! Ooh! Barney! Barney!

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-Ooh, ooh, Barney, ooh...

-CRASH!

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OK, Nev? What are you doing?

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Oh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh...!

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-What are you doing?

-Dizzy. Woo-ooh!

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How many times have I told you not to watch the washing machine!

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-Oh, ooh.

-Stand still. Stay. I'll get Ducky. It's all right.

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See! There you go. Look! Clean as a whistle.

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-Snuggly Ducky!

-OK. Right then, thank you.

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Let's put him up here to dry. Look. I bet he even smells nice, too.

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-Oh!

-Oh, ugh! Maybe not.

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-Poo-ee.

-Oh, hello.

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-Ah! G'day, boys!

-Crazy Keith. That explains it.

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Explains what, mate?

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Never mind. But when did you last have a bath?

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Ooh... What year is it?

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Mm... Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear.

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-KNOCK AT DOOR

-Oh!

-Um, who is it?

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It's, eh, me, Mr Barney, sir. Mr Prank.

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OK, come in. Keith, Keith...

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I know. I gotta hide down under

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so Angry Pants doesn't see me. Bye.

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Hello, Mr...Angry...Pants?

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Hey! Hi! How are we? Hoo-hoo!

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Hey, Mr Prank, um... Good to see you.

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Likewise, Mr Barney, likewise.

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You're looking soo-oo-per.

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-As for you, little Nev...

-Oh!

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Atchoo! Hey, how is my little favourite blue guy?

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-Hair!

-Hair?

-Here!

-Here?

-Here.

-Here?

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-Take a seat over here, Mr Prank.

-Oh!

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-Thanks, buddy. Don't mind if I do.

-Great!

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-Nev! Shh.

-Oh... Oh. Oh.

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-NEV GASPS

-Em, so, Mr Prank,

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-what can we do for you?

-Nothing. No thing.

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I was wondering what I can do for you.

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I'm the caretaker, after all. I'm here to serve you.

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Em, oh, great. Thank you very much.

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Well, the toaster's broken.

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Hey, no problemo, dude. Consider it fix...ed.

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-WHISPERS:

-Nev, Nev, come here.

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So, the Barnster... Notice anything different about me?

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No... No.

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Come on. You sure?

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Ehhhh... New shoes.

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At...choo! No. My hair... It grew back.

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Oh, your hair! Yeah. Wow!

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You know, now that you've pointed it out, it's...obvious.

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Overnight. Incredible, isn't it?

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-Almost unbelievable.

-Oh, yeah.

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I eat a lot of vegetables. I think that H-E-L-P-S, helps.

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Clearly.

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-GROWLING

-Aaghh!

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Nev, I'm going to work.

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Prank will fix the toaster.

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Angry Pants. Angry hair.

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Shh, don't mention that.

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It is a wig, but he won't want people to know.

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-But... Hair, grrrr!

-Listen, listen!

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Let's just help him.

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He's in a good mood.

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-Right, Mr Prank. I'm going to work.

-OK. Catch you later, du-u-ude!

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-Uh, OK. Love you, Nev. See you later.

-Love you, Barney. Mm.

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-Hello, Mr Angry Pants.

-Hey, Nevster, Neveroonie, the Nevernader!

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How are you, little blue buddy?

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-Groovy.

-Groovy? Me too, me too! Groovy is the word, my man.

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CRASH! Whoops! Clumsy old moi!

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-Ha!

-Angry Pants, Angry Pants!

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What, Nevva Doodie-Dude?

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-Hair.

-Yeah. It's great, isn't it?

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-No! Where is it? Where is it?!

-No!

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What did you do with it, you little blue monster?

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-Not me!

-Don't lie to me.

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I know it was you.

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-H-E-E-E-L-P!

-Oh, come back here, bear!

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-Oh...oh...oh.

-I know you've got my hair, bear.

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-No way, Jose!

-Give it back...NOW!

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NEV BLOWS A RASPBERRY

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Ooh! HE GROWLS

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Fee...fi...fiddly-dee...

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You've got my hair.

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Give it back to me!

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HE SNIFFS

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Atchoo! Ah... bear!

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Aah!! Ah! Aaah!

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OK, bear. You've had your little joke, heh-heh-heh-heh!

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No harm done. Now, I know you've got my hair. Give it back to me.

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-No, no, no, no!

-HAIR...NOW...OR ELSE!

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-Help!

-Ooh! CRASH!

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Here I am!

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HE GROWLS You...

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-Oh.

-You little blue nuisance. I'll...

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-I'll...

-What? Hair!

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-What?

-Hair back!

-Eh?

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Aw! Aw! Mwah! Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you,

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thank you! Mwah! Mwah! Erm... Eh...

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You mention this to anyone, bear, and I'll clean the loos with you!

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HE BLOWS A RASPBERRY

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I'll be back later, to fix the toaster.

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-Bye-bye, Mr Hairy Pants!

-HE GIGGLES

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Oh! Snuggly Ducky Duck-Duck! Gone! Oh! Ducky! Ducky!

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Ducky! Ducky! Ducky! Ducky!

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Oh... Ducky? Ducky? Ducky? Ducky! ..Ohhh!

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No... Not there either... Oh, wack-a-doo!

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It must be around here somewhere.

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Think, Keithie. When did you last have it?

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Er... Oh, I know... All right! Own up.

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Which one of you squealers took it? Tell me!

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THEY ALL SQUEAK

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Oh, OK! I'll believe you! Oh, now, where did I put it?

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Keith! Keith! Crazy Keith! Keith! Crazy Keith!

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Nev, slow down, buddy...

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-CRASH!

-Keith! Keith!

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Nev! Nev! Slow down! Why so stressed?

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Snuggly Ducky Duck-Duck! Gone!

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Oh! Gone? Wow! That's odd. I've been tearing the place apart,

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cos my favourite ice cream-eating spoon's missing too.

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-Oh, spooky.

-Yeah.

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-Too right, mate. Let's search as a team.

-Aye-aye, captain!

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Ah! Come on, Nev, just follow me. This way, mate!

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-This way. Follow me, follow me.

-NEV GASPS

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OK, I'll go your way. No problem.

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Nev?

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Nev! Nev?

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-Beatrice!

-Beatrice!

-There you are, guys. Em... Look,

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have you seen my favourite ladle?

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THEY GASP

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-No, no, no, no.

-Nah, sorry, Bea.

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It's weird. I had it this morning, then it disappeared.

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Just like my ice cream-eating spoon and Nev's Ducky.

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-They're missing too!

-Yeah, yeah.

-Something odd's going on.

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-Too right, Bro.

-Yeah... We're forming a search party to find them.

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-You wanna join us?

-I'm late for college.

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I'd better go, but I hope you guys find the stuff.

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-I'll see you later.

-Love you, Beetroot.

-Oh, I love you too, Nev,

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-and I'll love you more if you find my ladle!

-OK!

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Let's get moving. You search the sitting room, I'll do the kitchen.

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-So, have you had any luck with the searching?

-No, no!

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-Oh, me neither. It's no good, Nevvie. We've looked everywhere.

-Mm.

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-DOOR SLAMS

-Oh! Angry Pants! Hide!

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Oh, wack-a-doo!

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OK. Let's get this toaster fixed!

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Bom, bom, ba-bom bom...

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Snuggly Ducky Duck-Duck gone!

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Oh, I haven't got time to play hide-and-seek, BEAR.

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Just keep outta my way!

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Mm.

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GROWLING

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-GROWLING

-Aaaaaargh!

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CRASH!

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-GROWLING

-Oh! Oh!

-Aaargh!!

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-Where's my hair, bear?

-There!

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-GROWLING

-Oh... Oh!

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HAIR CHUCKLES My lovely hair! COME BACK!

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-Oh, oh, ohhh...

-Where'd it go, bear?

-I dunno.

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-GROWLING

-Ah! Oh!

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Ohhhhh...!

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Come back here, hair! You can't run off like that!

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Ooh!

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GROWLING

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SNARLING I got ya! Aahh!

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Grrrr...

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Yes! Hello. I bought a toupee off you the other day,

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and it's gone doolally. MUFFLED VOICE

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No, no, no, I don't mean I can't COMB it!

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It's attacking people and it stole my keys.

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Snuggly Ducky Duck-Duck.

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WHISPERS: I know...

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And a duck. Yes. So, what are you going to do about it?

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MUFFLED VOICE

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What d'you mean, there's nothing you CAN do?

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It's supposed to be lifelike, not actually alive!

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I can't return it. I can't even catch it!

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Yeah, but... Hello? DIALLING TONE

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Hello? Ohh... They've hung up.

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Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear.

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Well, it's too fast and too clever for me to catch on my own...

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I'm gonna need some help.

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Oh... OK, bear.

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I don't like you and you don't like me,

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but if want our stuff back we have to work together.

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-What do you say?

-Mmm...

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-Yeah, yeah!

-Right.

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First, we gotta find him.

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Sniff in the air!

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This way.

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Shh!

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Aaaa-yaaa! CRASHING

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< GLASS SMASHES

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-Yaah! Heh-heh!

-Oh! Oh! Barney's hat.

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Right, bear.

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-Open the lid!

-No way, Jose!

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Open it.

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No? Then I'll do it...

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Oh.

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QUACK! No.

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-Ducky!

-Oh... Right, let's go, bear.

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That hair must be somewhere in this block of flats.

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Come on, let's go!

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DUCK SQUEAKS Fifteen-love!

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Out for a duck! DUCK QUACKS

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It's no good, bear. We've looked everywhere. Nothing.

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-Oh, nothing.

-No sign of the hair, or any of the missing stuff.

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Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear.

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CRASHING

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The boiler room. We haven't looked

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-in the boiler room, have we?

-No, no, no, no!

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No. Well, you go and have a look and I'll wait up here.

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HE BLOWS A RASPBERRY

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I can't go down there!

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It's creepy enough without that crazy hair!

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-You go!

-No, no, no, no! You!

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-No, you.

-You!

-You!

-You!

-You!

-Grrrrrrrr!

-Grrr!

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Hmm.

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Oh! A plan!

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Yeah, yeah! A plan!

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Oi, Nev, look at this place!

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It's full of stuff that hairy monster must have nicked!

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He must have stolen stuff from everyone.

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-Too right, bro.

-Yeah.

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Oh! Cuckoo! Mine!

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Oh, yeah.

0:16:350:16:38

Oh, look. That's Mrs Willis' kettle, look. Yeah.

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They're my skis!

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What would a lump of hair want with my skis?

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Oh, look, there's a ladle...

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-Beetroot!

-..and some kind of spoon.

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-Crazy Keith!

-What? Who?

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Er, never mind.

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Crazy Keith? You're crazy, you are.

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-Ah!

-Oh! Snuggly Ducky Duck-Duck!

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Oh, eh, there's my keys, look. Over there.

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HAIR SNARLS

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Aaaaargh!

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HAIR SNORTS AND GROWLS

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L-L-L-Let's calm down, shall we?

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W-W-W-We don't want any trouble! SNARLING

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-No, no, no, no!

-HAIR GROWLS

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We all got off on the wrong foot.

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We'll return the stuff - pretend it never happened!

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-Yeah, yeah!

-HAIR GROWLS

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All right, all right. Forget that idea.

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Please, just come back and be my hair! Please! Please!

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I beg you! I'll do anything! Lovely combs! Expensive shampoo!

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Anything you want! Just PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME!

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Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear!

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HAIR LAUGHS

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Right! That's it! I've had it with you!

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You're my hair! You must obey me! Get back on my head, NOW!

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HAIR GROWLS

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Or not, as-as the case may be, it's up to you. That's lovely.

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HAIR GROWLS It's all right...

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LOW GROWLING AND SNARLING

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Frightened!

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CUCKOO CLOCK STRIKES

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Oh!

0:18:590:19:01

Huh?!

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NEV GASPS FOR BREATH

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-Grrrrr!

-NEV SCREAMS

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Now! Now!

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Oi! Hair!

0:19:220:19:24

-Just so I understand this...

-Yeah.

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Under there is your hair, which came to life,

0:19:310:19:34

and started stealing stuff and attacking people.

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Yes, Mr Barney, sir.

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-Too right, bro!

-Right, and that's the stuff that it stole?

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Yes. And as soon as we've trapped it,

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-I'm gonna return everything.

-OK, if you say so.

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But isn't this just a silly lump of hair?

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-Is all this really necessary?

-Oh, yeah.

-Yeah!

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Oh, yeah. Shall I? ..Ready?

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-Whoa! Get it!

-Nearly got it.

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There! Let's see you get out of that!

0:20:040:20:08

-Whoah! This thing's crazy.

-Aye-aye, captain.

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Tell you what, though. Proves one thing -

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you two make a good team!

0:20:140:20:16

-Oh, yes.

-Yeah, yeah!

-CRASH!

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This doesn't change a thing, bear!

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I'm still not gonna put up with your high jinks!

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-Angry Pants!

-Atchoo!

0:20:250:20:28

Oh, well, I, er...

0:20:290:20:32

I-I must be off, sir!

0:20:320:20:35

Goodbye!

0:20:360:20:38

Well, Nev, you've had quite a day.

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-Aye-aye, captain!

-I suppose you'd say it's been...hair-raising!

0:20:460:20:51

-Hair-raising!

-Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear!

0:20:510:20:53

What? That's funny. Raising hair. It's the hair...

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-It's his hair.

-Funny!

-Cos it's scary, it's hair-raising!

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