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Alice in Nevvieland Bear Behaving Badly

Alice in Nevvieland

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HE BURPS

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More, please, Barney.

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Right, Nev, your tenth and very last pancake

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is coming up!

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-DRUM ROLL

-3, 2, 1. Boom!

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Stuck.

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-Yeah.

-Oh!

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Morning. >

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-Barbara.

-I'm just off to that celebrity dog in bag convention.

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With Chubs, of course.

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And I'm wearing my new hat for the occasion.

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Most tasteful, don't you think?

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When you say tasteful...

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Woof, woof!

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I'll walk you to the bus stop, Aunt Barbara, it's on my way to work.

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Good morning, Mr Prank.

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It certainly is, Mr Barney, sir.

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Miss Barbara, sir. Er, ma'am.

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That's a lovely hat.

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Stop wittering, man. I'm off.

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Off for the day, isn't it, ma'am?

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And I'm quite happy to take charge in your absence.

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No, no need to thank me. Have a nice time.

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-Go, go, go.

-Caretaker, caretaker, couldn't care less taker.

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Love you.

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Gone.

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Mr Andrew Prank's day of freedom starts right here, right now.

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-HE SNEEZES

-Ew!

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And not even my allergy to you, bear, will ruin this best day ever.

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Ice cream, yum-yum.

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# I'm the man, yes I am

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# Giving it large cos I'm in charge. #

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Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear.

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# I'm selling ice cream, all the day

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# All this cash is coming my way One time! #

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KNOCK AT DOOR

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Hello, dearies.

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NEV SCREAMS

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I...I...

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Don't be frightened. I'm Aunt Alice.

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As in Alice In Wonderland. Hee-hee.

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What?

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Oh, you must be little Nevvy?

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My sister said you were a cute and adorable little doggy.

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Woof-woof.

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Your sister is Miss Barbara?

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Yes, Plank, and Barbara said you'd love a visit from Mr Tick Tock.

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So here you go.

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-Here we are.

-Yeah, right.

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Hello, Ticky.

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Just what I need, another ball of allergy misery.

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HE SNEEZES

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And she volunteered you to be my special helper today.

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What sort of helper?

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Today, Plank, you're going to bake jam tarts for the Queen Of Hearts.

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Woof, woof.

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Are you crazy?

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I'm not crazy. I'm Alice In Wonderland.

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Oh, mixing bowl.

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Flour. NEV COUGHS

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Rolling pin.

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Butter.

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Yum-yum.

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Jam.

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Jam. I love you, jam!

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Oh, what's tha...?

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Oh, I brought everything we need.

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PLANK SNEEZES

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You are supposed to me looking after Mr Tick Tock, not scaring him.

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Put him down now, Plank.

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It's "Prank" and this fleabag keeps setting off my allergies.

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Just make sure that Mr Tick Tock is happy and safe today, Plank,

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or I'll report you to my sister.

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I'll get you, rabbit.

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Oh, Mr Tick Tock is such a precious pumpkin.

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Adorable.

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That's the cushion.

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Woof, woof.

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Nevvy, that jam isn't for the likes of you and me.

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-Oh!

-That's my special eat-me jam.

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Don't tell me, this eat me jam makes you grow enormous

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like Alice in the book, I suppose.

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Exactly.

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Mr Tick Tock and I have seen it happen.

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Barking.

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We have seen the wonders of Wonderland.

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We know the truth.

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Sleep well, my little, white, fluffy wabbit.

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Don't fall down too many rabbit holes in your dreams.

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MANIC LAUGHTER

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Hey, Doris, Aunt B's sister really thinks she is Alice In Wonderland.

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What do you say to that?

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I agree. She's doolally dingo.

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Her rabbit could not get away fast enough.

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-LIFT WHIRRS

-Wackadoo!

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If he's not, just come Down Under to say hello.

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G'day, Mr Tick Tock.

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The name's Crazy Keith.

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And this is Doris.

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One of your rabbit cousins.

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The family resemblance is uncanny.

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Dum-de-dum-da.

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Come on, Plank, roll, roll, roll,

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you dozy dormouse. Keep up with Nevvy.

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(I'll get you, bear.)

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Help.

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Did you say "help", Plank? Of course I'll help you.

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Next you'll need the pastry cutters.

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Then...Oh!

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Oh! Oh!

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Disaster!

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I've forgotten the baking trays.

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I know. I'll go upstairs and get Barbara's.

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I'm going to get you, bear!

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Argh!

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Bear!

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I'm going to get you, bear!

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Can't catch me.

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I'll get you...

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BANGING UPSTAIRS

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Sorry about the neighbours.

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They like to party, but they are friendly.

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SNEEZES

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Hey, Doris. Do you reckon your rabbitty cousin

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would like a bite to eat?

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You read my mind, doll. Jam sandwiches all round.

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Now, where did I put my supplies?

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Jam, jam, jammity jam.

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I know. Nevvy will lend us some jam.

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BLOWS RASPBERRY

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I'll get you, bear. Whoa!

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Oops.

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I'm going to go to the bathroom and clean myself up, bear.

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Whoa, Nevvy, sorry to trouble you.

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But can I borrow a bit of jam, buddy?

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Doris and I have got a VIP guest to entertain.

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A certain white rabbit, don't you know?

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Ticky.

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Yeah. He's Down Under and hungry for jam sarnies. I'll help myself.

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No, no, no, no. Jam, eat me.

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Exactly. It's just asking to be eaten.

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No, no, no, no. Big.

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You're not falling for all that

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growing big nonsense, have you, Nevvy?

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It's just an ordinary jar of jam.

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Look.

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See. Nothing special.

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Oh, jam!

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We could always try a bit, just to make doubly sure. After you, buddy.

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Jam. Ooh, jam. Jam. I love you, jam!

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Jam.

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Here's hoping that Alice is a crazy wannabe and not the real deal.

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Or else you're about to become...

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What the Wonderland...?

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RUMBLE

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Ah!

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You're huge, Nevster.

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Old Alice and her eat-me jam are the real deal.

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Are you all right up there, buddy?

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Yummy. Scrummy. Jam!

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Tip-topperoo.

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Where were we?

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I gotta hide!

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Wait till I get my hands on...

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-SQUEAKS:

-You.

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Can't catch me. Ha-ha.

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Argh!

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SNEEZES VIOLENTLY

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You've eaten the jam.

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And I'll get the blame.

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Oh, no. Allergy overload.

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Think...be calm.

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Controlled.

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Hello, Mr Angry Pants.

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Argh!

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What do you want?

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Hungry.

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Please don't eat me.

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I'll give you anything you want.

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You can have all my ice cream for a week.

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More, please.

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All right, a month.

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More, please.

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I tell you what, you can have it forever.

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Oh, kissy-kissy, Mr Angry Pants.

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-No!

-Mm-mwah!

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Aaagh! Let me out of here!

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Aaagghhh!

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Plank, look where you're going, man!

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But...

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You're supposed to be rolling my pastry, protecting my jam

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and looking after Mr Tick Tock.

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Mr Tick Tock, I'll deal...

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Mr Plank, if anything happens to that rabbit, I'll make sure you're fired!

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Now, stand aside and let me in!

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Shan't! I shan't, no.

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ALICE: I'm going in! >

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-MR ANGRY PRANK:

-It's not safe! >

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-Ah!

-Move! >

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Oh, Nevvy. Alice will go even more bonkers if she sees what's happened.

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We've got to hide you.

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Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear!

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Too big!

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Er, yeah, there is that!

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You're way too big to escape Down Under.

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-Fwightened!

-Think, Nevvy. What happens next,

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in that crazy Wonderland book?

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Erm, "Drink me, shrink me."

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Oh! That's it!

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There must be a drink-me bottle in that bag of hers.

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Let's have a look.

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Ah-ha! Bonza, Nevvy!

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Get this down you, quick!

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Here you go, matey. Enjoy!

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SLURPING

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HE LAUGHS

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Oh, no, no. Not the tickling, no.

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No, I can't win, can I?

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If I don't let you in I'll get the sack, and if I do let you in...

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I'll get the sack! And then I'll get eaten by a giant...

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What?!

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Did you say, a giant?!

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Nevvy, have you been eating my special jam?

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Woof!

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What?

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Plank, I see no giants! Just a dear little doggie,

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looking after my precious Mr Tick Tock.

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Mmm.

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Come to Mummy for a cuddle!

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Uh-oh.

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Aaagh!

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You've lost my rabbit!

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Off with his head!

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NIBBLING

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Ah!

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Ah, sorry about the lack of jam, buddy.

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Big story.

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I'll explain later.

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What's that?

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Oh! You need to visit the little boys' room, eh?

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Well, let me show you the way.

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SOBBING

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My rabbit!

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Uh-oh.

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CRYING CONTINUES

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Ticky wicky.

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Take your time in the loo, mate!

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Never good to rush these things.

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DRIPPING

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Ow! Oooh!

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Oh!

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Crazy Keith, help!

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Ticky, please!

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ALICE CRYING

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Oh. Is Alice missing a rabbit?

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Yeah-yeah.

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HE CRIES

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Poor bunny!

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Oh! Ow!

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Oh dear. Well, that explains the flash flood.

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Well, don't panic, Nevvy. The bunny's in the dunny.

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Phew-ee.

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KNOCKING

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You're needed, Tick Tock. Time to get you out.

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Strewth! It's the latch. It's stuck down on the other side.

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Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear.

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Alice is blubbing, the water's rising,

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and the rabbit's trapped!

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What are we going to do, Nevvy?

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Ohh. Mmm, oh!

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Oh, "drink me!"

0:15:350:15:37

OK!

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Thank you, Barbara!

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CHATTERING ON THE PHONE

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So you're coming home now?

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Please hurry!

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Psst!

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Well done, Nev. I've got the eat-me jam.

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And I've got some carrots for Ticky. Now, come on!

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Tip-top-eroo!

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KNOCKING

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We're back, Tick Tock!

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SLURPING

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Nevvy's just taken a swig of the drink-me potion

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so a little help is on it's way.

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"Little help", ha-ha-ha!

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Little - ha-ha!

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Here I am.

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Wackadoo, Nevvy!

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You sure are tiny!

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I guess you polished off the whole lot.

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NEV BURPS

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So you ready to rescue the bunny from the bog?

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Yeah-yeah.

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-Come here. I'll pick you up.

-Yeah-yeah.

0:16:550:16:59

Good luck, brave buddy.

0:17:000:17:01

Whee!

0:17:010:17:03

Come on, Nevvy!

0:17:030:17:05

Get to the keyhole and then pull!

0:17:050:17:07

Pull that latch with all your might!

0:17:070:17:10

Ohh! Good work, Nevster!

0:17:270:17:30

Now for the fun bit. Climb out of the keyhole and straight into the jam.

0:17:300:17:34

Go on!

0:17:340:17:36

SPLAT! Ha-ha-ha-ha!

0:17:360:17:38

You'd better be quick though. The flood's getting worse.

0:17:380:17:41

Dear, oh, dear, oh... Eugh, dear!

0:17:410:17:44

Dum-ti-dum-tum-dum!

0:17:440:17:46

Here I am!

0:17:460:17:47

Bonza, buddy!

0:17:470:17:49

Now, come on, Mr Tick Tock. Follow the carrot.

0:17:490:17:52

-Come on, Ticky.

-This way!

0:17:520:17:54

That bear's finally got what he wanted -

0:17:550:17:58

me...gone!

0:17:580:18:02

-Oh!

-Oh.

0:18:040:18:06

Goodbye...flat!

0:18:070:18:10

Oh. Poor Mr Angry Pants.

0:18:100:18:14

Ah. Well, look on the bright side, Nevvy,

0:18:140:18:16

if Angry Pants leaves, then there's no more sneaking around for me.

0:18:160:18:21

Groovy.

0:18:210:18:23

Here, Ticky. Ticky-Ticky.

0:18:230:18:25

Ticky.

0:18:250:18:27

Goodbye, wall!

0:18:300:18:34

Goodbye, ice-cream business!

0:18:350:18:39

Oh, didger me doodah!

0:18:390:18:42

I forgot there'd be no more ice cream!

0:18:420:18:44

Hmmm.

0:18:440:18:45

-I know, I know!

-Eh?

0:18:460:18:48

Oh, I get you, Nevvy!

0:18:500:18:53

It's over to Tick Tock to save the day.

0:18:530:18:55

Or should I say, save our ice-cream supplies!

0:18:550:18:58

Ha-ha! Brilliant!

0:18:580:18:59

Hello, Mr Angry Pants!

0:19:040:19:06

Looky-bag.

0:19:060:19:08

Aaah-choo!

0:19:080:19:09

You! After all you've done to me today, Bear!

0:19:090:19:13

Why would you care about my bag?!

0:19:130:19:15

Ticky!

0:19:150:19:16

Yes! Yes, the rabbit's gone, you've won!

0:19:160:19:20

I'm just going to go and give this letter of resignation

0:19:200:19:23

to the sobbing Miss Alice, and then you'll never see me again!

0:19:230:19:26

I hope you're happy!

0:19:260:19:28

No, no, no, no! Ticky bag!

0:19:280:19:30

HE CRIES

0:19:300:19:33

But...oh.

0:19:330:19:34

Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear.

0:19:340:19:36

Oh, Mr Tick Tock, where are you?

0:19:360:19:40

Oh, no!

0:19:420:19:45

Miss Alice...

0:19:480:19:50

You again?!

0:19:500:19:51

I never thought you'd show your face here again!

0:19:510:19:55

The rabbit wasn't my fault! Oh, what's the use?

0:19:550:19:59

Just take this, will you?

0:19:590:20:01

Oh, Plank! You hero!

0:20:010:20:06

-Eh?

-You found Mr Tick Tock!

-Eh?

0:20:060:20:10

Oh, you wonderful man!

0:20:100:20:13

How can I ever thank you?

0:20:130:20:16

I have? I mean, I am!

0:20:160:20:19

Woof-woof!

0:20:190:20:20

I'm going to ask my sister to double, no, triple your wages!

0:20:200:20:24

Well, just doing what any humble caretaker would do.

0:20:270:20:31

Most grateful, sir... Er, ma'am!

0:20:310:20:33

I'm so happy! I'm grinning like a Cheshire cat!

0:20:330:20:39

I get it now, Bear - "Ticky...bag."

0:20:400:20:44

Yes. I think you may well have saved my job today, Bear.

0:20:440:20:48

But why?

0:20:480:20:49

Love you, Mr Angry Pants.

0:20:490:20:51

Oh, well, I think you may deserve some ice cream as a thank-you.

0:20:510:20:56

Oh, groovy!

0:20:560:20:57

Yes. Today's turned out pretty well because of you.

0:20:570:21:00

Praaaank!

0:21:000:21:03

Oh.

0:21:030:21:05

We're flooded!

0:21:050:21:09

THUMP!

0:21:090:21:10

Oh!

0:21:100:21:11

Me and my big mouth!

0:21:110:21:15

Mate, what a day.

0:21:170:21:19

You must be shattered.

0:21:190:21:20

Too right, bro.

0:21:200:21:22

If I'd known Aunt Alice was coming, I'd have warned you.

0:21:220:21:24

Yeah-yeah.

0:21:240:21:26

Do you know, she believes she's Alice from the Wonderland books?

0:21:260:21:29

-She even pretends to make her own grow and shrink potions.

-Hmm.

0:21:290:21:33

What was that flood about, anyway?

0:21:330:21:35

Um...I don't know!

0:21:350:21:38

Oh well. No harm done. All sorted.

0:21:380:21:42

I beg to differ, Barnster.

0:21:430:21:46

My place is still drying out.

0:21:460:21:48

And as for Doris...

0:21:480:21:49

She's waterlogged and whiffy!

0:21:490:21:52

Just look what happens when I give her a hug.

0:21:520:21:55

Keith!

0:21:580:22:00

BEAR LAUGHS

0:22:000:22:02

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