Yes I Am, No You're Not Charlie and Lola


Yes I Am, No You're Not

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THEY LAUGH

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Ah! Charlie!

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-Lola?

-Charlie!

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THEY LAUGH

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I have this little sister, Lola. She is small and very funny.

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-I'm not small.

-You're quite small.

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No, I'm not, Charlie. I am big. Look!

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No, you're definitely NOT big, Lola. You're quite small.

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And also, I am not funny.

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-Yes, you are, Lola.

-No, I'm not, Charlie. I'm very clever.

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My brain is as big as this.

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-But that's bigger than your head, Lola.

-Yes. That is how clever I am.

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-Your brain cannot be bigger than your head.

-Yes, it can.

-No, it can't.

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-Yes, it can.

-Oh!

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-Sometimes, Lola and I squabble.

-I don't squabble.

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-Yes, you do.

-YOU squabble.

-You do, too.

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-I don't.

-Yes, you do.

-No, I don't.

-Do.

-Don't.

-Do.

-Don't.

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We both do. Remember this morning, at breakfast?

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-CRUNCH!

-I can crunch the loudest.

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No, I can crunch the loudest.

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CRUNCH! CRUNCH! CRUNCH! CRUNCH!

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-Yes!

-I'm still crunching.

-Still not very loudly.

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But I haven't finished my turn yet.

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-CRUNCH! CRUNCH! GULP!

-That is REALLY loud crunching.

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-I didn't even know you were crunching.

-Ha-ha-ha!

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Crunch! Crunch!

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-I'm as loud as Charlie.

-HE CRUNCHES

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-I can do louder.

-No, I am!

-HE CRUNCHES

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I'm louder! That is really loud crunching, Charlie!

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'Mum said we were both loud crunchers,

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'but could we please stop squabbling and tidy up, or no puppet show.

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'Sometimes, it's about silly things like crunching.

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'Sometimes it's about sharing things.'

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One, two, three... and one blue one for you.

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Why do you get three and I only get one?

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Because blue sweets

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are more important and heavy than red ones.

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-You're not sharing properly.

-I am.

-You're not.

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-I am.

-You're not.

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-I am.

-You're not.

-I am.

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'Sometimes, we squabble over what we want.'

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-Ah!

-I want to watch that really good show called Everything About Dogs.

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Wouldn't you rather watch Bat Cat?

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-No.

-But you really like Bat Cat.

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No. Today, I really want to watch Everything About Dogs.

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-Bat Cat's REALLY good.

-Does it have any dogs being brushed in it?

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Er...yes.

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-No, it does not.

-Does.

-Does not.

-It does.

-Does not.

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'When we won't stop squabbling,

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'Mum and Dad make us sit on the Simmer Down Chairs.'

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'They are called the Simmer Down Chairs because we get boiling mad,

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'so we have to sit quietly until we have simmered down.

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'And sometimes, you don't get to go to the park, or the library,

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'or the cinema.'

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If we squabble today, Mum and Dad won't let us go to the puppet show.

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-I really want to go to the puppet show.

-Me, too. So no squabbling.

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-Charlie, I am stopping squabbling.

-SHE GIGGLES

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So am I. I think we should play our own games, by ourselves,

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-so we don't, by accident, start squabbling.

-That's clever, Charlie.

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Come on, Pig, I'm taking you for a walk.

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"OK, Lola. Snort! Snort!"

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-Brrroom! Brrroom!

-BANG! BANG! BANG!

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Oh...!

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Can you stop that banging, Lola?

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I can't, Charlie. It is Pig.

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She has very big trotter-feet. Brrroom!

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You could stop, if you tried hard.

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-No, I really couldn't.

-Lola, just try.

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GENTLE TAPPING

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Ah! See?

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-Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!

-Lola, stop banging!

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-I tried, but I can't.

-You didn't try very hard.

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-I did.

-Did not.

-Did too.

-Did not.

-Did too.

-Did not.

-Did too.

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We're squabbling! We need to stop.

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-Oh!

-If Mum hears us, she might make us sit on the Simmer Down Chairs.

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Not the Simmer Down Chairs!

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-And we won't get to see the Chinese puppet show.

-We must NOT squabble.

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-Not a peep.

-OK, Charlie.

-We'll have to be very quiet.

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SHE HUMS

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Can you pass me the red crayon, Charlie?

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I need that for my Bat Cat collar.

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But I need it. Can't your collar be black?

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Bat Cat's collar is red and the red crayon is mine.

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Oh, no, it's mine - the yellow one, the pink one and the red one.

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The red one is mine!

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-But I like red.

-So?

-I need it.

-So do I.

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OK.

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-Now your collar's black.

-Huh!

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-SNAP!

-Oh!

-There!

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-Grrr!

-Grrr!

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You are such a meanie!

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-Look who's talking!

-You're a meanie!

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-You are!

-You're a meanie!

-You're meaner than me.

-You're such a meanie!

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-Harrumph!

-Humph!

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Hmmph.

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This is all your fault, Charlie.

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It's not just my fault. It takes two to squabble.

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Hmm.

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And now today, we will definitely not be seeing any puppets.

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Oh...!

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Oooh!

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'And then I had a really good idea!'

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"Woof! Woof, woof! Woof! Woof!

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-"Woof!"

-Huh?

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"You keep squabbling because you say 'no' to each other all the time."

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-What do you mean?

-"Well, if you said 'yes' all the time,

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"you couldn't squabble, could you?"

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Hmm...you are very right.

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Yes! But who are you?

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-"I am Squabbles the dog."

-Squabbles the dog?

-"Yes, yes."

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Hello, Squabbles. Oh! I know! Wait, wait, wait.

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"Miaow! Do you need any Bat Cat help today?"

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"Yes, I do, actually, Bat Cat. Thank goodness you are here!

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-"I'm in dreadful trouble!"

-"What is your problem, Squabbles?"

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-"Well, my fur is all scruffy and I might even have fleas!"

-"Fleas?!"

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# Bat Cat! #

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It's a disaster! Woof! Woof! Woof!

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My hair brush is locked in that building and I don't have a key.

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Don't worry, Squabbles, because I am Bat Cat -

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the super cat!

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-I really am a super-duper super cat!

-# Well, fancy that!

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# Hero cat! #

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-Uh...

-BANGING AND CRASHING

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-Huh?

-Yes! I have the hair brush!

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Yes?

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Woof! Woof-woof! Now I can go to the dog show. Thank you, Bat Cat.

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Yes! Another dreadful emergency is completely solved.

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-Yes!

-OK! ..Mum says we're doing really well.

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-Can we just tidy up the colouring things?

-Yes, Charlie.

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-I'll put this here. Is that OK?

-Yes. Shall I put this in here?

-Yes.

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Yes.

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Yes.

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-I'll tidy this up and you tidy that up.

-Yes, Lola.

-Yes, Charlie.

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I like saying yes.

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-Yes!

-Yes!

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-We'll just get there if we're really quick.

-We don't want to miss the...

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-Chinese puppet show!

-PEOPLE SHUSH

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GONG BEAT

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Ooh!

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BIRD SINGS

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-Who is that, Charlie?

-Little Monkey.

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BIRD SINGS

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ROARING

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Oh, no! Little Monkey is going to get cooked!

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He'll have to think quickly.

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Little Monkey will be a delicious snack for my tea!

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Roar! He will be MY pudding!

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-Roar! Keep your claws off!

-No, you keep YOUR claws off!

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Stop arguing!

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-Those dragons are squabbling.

-They should sit on the Simmer Down Chairs.

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-YOU are arguing with ME!

-Roar!

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-Where's the monkey?

-You lost him - my snack!

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-We don't ever squabble, do we?

-No, we don't.

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-You mean YES, we don't!

-THEY LAUGH

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Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd - 2006

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E-mail [email protected]

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