Ground Bog Day Dani's Castle

Thank you for tuning in, guys, but up next I'm dedicating this song

to my little brother for his birthday tomorrow.

Hope you have a good one, bro. Peace out, Bogmoor.

Oh! Erm, I'll see you next time.

Gabe, what have I told you about getting close when I'm on air?

Apologies, Master Rich,

but Leonie said you wanted to see me about something of an urgent nature?

Oh, no, yeah, I do. I need your opinion on something.

Floral waistcoat, extra frilly cuffs and an ocean-blue necktie.

-What?

-It'll bring out your eyes.

No, it was more to do with Dylan's birthday.

Look, I'm trying to find out what he wants but all

I can get out of him is "a perfect birthday with the whole gang".

I mean, you can't order that online.

Master Rich, I have lots of ideas!

We could start with a game of hunt the slipper

followed by a marbles tournament.

-No, Gabe.

-And then we could round the whole day off by besporting

ourselves around the maypole.

No, I was thinking more of a 21st-century birthday, like cakes,

presents, disco, all Dylan-themed. I mean, what do you think, hey?

I think Master Dylan will much prefer your idea.

Sweet, you know Dylan is going to have the best birthday ever.

Just one more sleep until your birthday.

Let's get ready to party!

Something's come up. I'm going to have to cancel.

You can't cancel a birthday.

My science teacher wants me to conduct an original

experiment fully recording our method and results.

It's going to take all weekend.

-So not groovy.

-Tell me about it.

I'm going to be spending my whole birthday with my nose

stuck in books.

Or maybe just one book.

-The Earl of Bogmoor's private journal?

-I noticed something

when I was using the book to learn how to speak poltergeist.

You can speak poltergeist?

SHE GROWLS

-What does that mean?

-It means no.

OK, so, the Earl of Bogmoor's very own experiments.

If you use one of the Earl's experiments, you can sit back

and enjoy your birthday.

But I always do my homework.

Well, exactly, so you've earned the right to not do it this one time.

Oh, come on, Dylan.

You do not want to miss it, it is going to be the best birthday ever.

Well, a short-cut just this once can't hurt.

Check this one out. A Stitch In Time.

OK, question five in the kitchen tools exam.

What is this?

Oh, erm...

Oh, it's a head massager.

Oh, yeah, I love these.

They had them everywhere when I was in Thailand.

Yeah, that's right, Clare, when I'm baking,

I love to use my trusty head massager.

Oh, it's a whisk! That makes sense.

WHISTLE Right, listen up, troops.

I've officially appointed myself coordinator for Dylan's birthday.

Of course you have.

Right, Clare, I want you in charge of the presents.

I want you to use your shopaholic swag to really nail it.

Kait, I want you in charge of the cake.

Now, I want it in a shape of something Dylan would love, like,

I don't know, animals or football or, you know, me.

Yeah, I'm not sure I'd have enough icing for your head.

All right, well, you choose and just make sure it's perfect, yeah?

Gabe? Where's Gabe?

-Argh!

-Ah!

I am so sorry, Master Rich, I've been working so hard lately

at the ghostel, my coordinates are just a little exhausted.

Well, this'll take your mind off things.

I want you in charge of all the decorations for Dylan's birthday.

Everybody know what they're doing? Come on then, troops, let's go.

Hang on a minute. What if we're not happy with our jobs?

Yeah, what if we want to step outside of our comfort zone?

I have a great idea. You should totally do the cake.

-Wait a minute...

-And you can do the presents.

-No, no, no, no...

-Deal!

-All right, I've just allowed that to happen, then.

-Master Rich.

What now?

I would love to fulfil my duties of the decorations

but with the ghostel being so busy, I'm not sure I'd get time away.

Look, Gabe, you've got to be there.

Look, guys, we've all got to be there.

-Look, I just want his day to be... ALL: Perfect.

-Perfect.

Yes, exactly. All right, everybody get to work, chop, chop, chop, chop.

WHISTLE

Sorry, I took the long way around again.

Nice try, Roxy, but I know where you were.

You were planning my birthday surprise for tomorrow.

It's your birthday tomorrow!

I haven't seen acting this bad

since the time you played dead to get out of cleaning the mouse hole.

No, no, Carlos, I really did forget it was your birthday tomorrow.

OK. In that case, I really hate surprises.

You do? Great, because I haven't planned you one.

And the MOUSE-car goes to...Roxy!

Carlos, this isn't acting.

You're telling me this isn't acting?

HE LAUGHS

WHISTLE What's happening, Clare-bear?

Are we all excited for the old Bogmoor Bake Off, then?

-How did you know?

-Know what?

That's what I'm going to bake. Bogmoor.

Oh, your first cake's going to be a Bogmoor Castle?

Yeah, and it's all ready for yours truly to bake

first thing in the morning.

Equipment, check. Ingredients, check.

Architectural structural building plans, check!

Look, Clare, don't take this in the wrong way, but I think baking

a cake of Bogmoor Castle might be a little complicated.

Why don't you try something simple, like a football,

or just a plain circle?

I am baking Bogmoor for that precise reason -

you lot think I can't.

Now leave before I do something with this spatula.

You know that's not a spatula, don't you?

-Out, go on, shoo!

-All right, chill.

This experiment's weird. I might need some help with this.

Weird is my middle name. What do you need?

A pocket watch,

a needle, some red thread and a photo of Bogmoor Castle.

WHISTLE

Oh, Master Rich. What do you think?

It's not finished yet

and I'm also going to pen Master Dylan a birthday sonnet.

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold on there, Shakespeare.

I was thinking something a little more 21st century, you know?

Remember, it is for Dylan's birthday, not the Queen.

I knew I should have worked in an LOL somewhere.

Sorry, Master Rich, birthdays were not a big deal when I was alive.

Well, believe me, it's the opposite nowadays,

and this needs to be perfect, all right?

Speaking of which,

any luck in getting some time off from the ghostel tomorrow?

I just pulled a double shift and...

Gabe, you're a ledge.

In truth, I'm looking forward to it. It's my first day off in weeks.

Great, well, get back to those decorations, yeah?

How's this?

Birthday salutations, young squire.

Nah.

OWL HOOTS

Come on, come on, come on. Yes, ha-ha!

Don't mess with me, Miley Cyberspace,

I am the queen at online auctions.

Fair Maiden Kaitlin, is that your online handle, is it?

-Kait was already taken.

-Oh, yeah, sure.

Anyway, do you want to know what I just won?

-A hairbrush for Prince William?

-No, a telescope.

-For Prince William?

-No, for Dylan's birthday present,

and it's going to arrive tomorrow, just in time for the party.

-Oh, well, that's...

-Perfect, I know.

Do you know what? I think Dylan's really going to like that, you know.

-Good job, Kait.

-Yeah, now tell me, what have you been getting up to

while we've all been making this birthday legendary?

Well, I've organised something that's going to blow Dylan's

birthday socks off.

A wind machine?

No, his favourite radio DJ, apart from myself, of course.

Wait, you've got the one-and-only DJ T-Rex?

Boom, he's coming live to Bogmoor

and we are going to dance the night away.

Well, I've got to hand it to you, Rich.

You may have just pulled off the best birthday party to

-ever hit Bogmoor.

-Let's bring on tomorrow, hey?

Whoa, that was quick.

-I found these in Gabe's secret stash.

-Oh, cool.

Everything I need to knock off my homework in time for my birthday.

COCKEREL CROWS

'Good morning, Bogmoor, it's 10:00AM on Saturday 4th May

'and we're going to kick things off with a special

'dedication for my brother's birthday.

'This is from your old pal Leonie.

'It's a golden oldie from the '70s, just like her.'

Happy birthday, dude!

-Thanks.

-That better not be your excited face, because it sucks.

Sorry, I had to stay up late last night to do the experiment.

It specifically says,

"This experiment must be carried out at one minute past midnight."

Well, now it's done, let's get this party started!

Yeah, but nothing's happened

and I followed every step of the instructions.

Look, I needed a photo of the dwelling where the experiment

would take place, then at one minute past minute I had to stop

the pocket watch so I could sow a row of stitches through it, see?

Wow, pretty far-out stuff.

What do I put as my conclusion when nothing's happened?

That it was inconclusive. I saw that once on a TV show.

Trust me.

There we go. So, now that's all done, time to party.

-Well, Mary Berry, how'd the cake turn out?

-I messed up.

It looks like this place needs a little bit of a cleanup.

No, the cake, it didn't quite go to plan.

Well, does it look like Bogmoor?

-Does it look like a cake?

-No.

But that's not a castle. That's an old ruin.

I don't understand how it went wrong.

I triple checked all the ingredients.

I'm guessing you didn't put that in.

The baking powder!

It must have rolled under the table whilst I was mixing.

No wonder it didn't rise.

Look, I need to go and check on the others.

Everyone said that I'd mess up.

-Well, prove them wrong, fix it.

-How?

DOORBELL

Thanks.

Ah, one genius birthday present delivered. You're welcome, Dylan.

Oof.

Who put that there?

Has Dylan's present arrived? What's it doing over there?

-Come on, the party's starting in five minutes.

-Yeah, but, Rich...

-And where's Gabe?! I've been looking for him all morning.

-Rich!

WHISTLE

No! I ordered a teleSCOPE, not a telePHONE.

Do you know where you are?

What is your name?

Gabe, mate, where have you been?

And why is there an Inuit fishing from a bucket in the library?

She is a ghostel client.

I thought you said you was closed for the day?

I was, but she obviously couldn't read the sign.

Master Rich, I don't suppose you speak Inuktitut at all?

Oh, do you know what? Actually, I do. I learnt it in Alaska.

Excellent, you can translate.

-No, I was being sarcastic, Gabe.

-I always fall for that.

So, are you coming to the party or what?

I think it's best I stay with her. Don't you?

Be careful.

Finally. Look, Dylan's going to be here any minute, all right?

-Is that the cake?

-Yeah.

-I thought you said you was going to fix it?

-I did, I added icing.

What, in every colour?

Look, I feel bad enough that I ruined Dylan's Bogmoor

birthday cake.

-Maybe we can tell him it's Bogmoor Marsh or something.

-Yeah, cool.

Kait, get the telescope out, put it on the table.

I need to distract Dylan from the cake, all right?

Well, the thing about the telescope is...it's actually a telephone.

And why did we get Dylan an old telephone?

Well, the items were listed next to each on the online auction

so I might have clicked on the wrong one.

-And why's it broken?

-Because I also might have dropped it.

OK.

-Hey, what's all this?

-Surprise!

Oh, wicked! A surprise party.

Look, Dylan, I wanted to make this the best birthday ever but...

-Dylan, I ruined your cake.

-And I messed up your present.

And an Inuit ghost checked into the ghostel,

so Gabe's not going to be here.

It might be quicker if you just tell us what went right.

Well, that stuff doesn't matter.

-We can still have a good time, can't we?

-Yeah.

Of course we can.

Look, especially if there's one last surprise that might just turn

this day around, all right?

He goes by the name of DJ T-Rex.

No way! DJ T-Rex is coming here for my birthday?

Live in the flesh, little man. He's on his way right now.

Wait. Don't move, all right? MOBILE RINGS

What's happening, DJ T-Rex?

No, look, you can't cancel.

Look, I'm sure the traffic jam will clear, yeah?

Well, I'm sure the cows in the middle of the road will clear.

Look, whatever you do, just don't turn back...

THE CALL CUTS OUT

Dylan, your big brother's organised the worst birthday ever. I'm sorry.

Let's go.

-Sorry, Dylan.

-Sorry.

You don't need to go. We've still good food and drink and....

Cake soup?

I'm sorry your birthday wasn't all that we built it up to be.

It was great.

Well, I hung out and tried cake soup.

I just wish everyone else enjoyed themselves.

I mean, Rich seemed really stressed out, but there's always next year.

And sometimes birthdays come around sooner than you think.

COCKEREL CROWS

'Good morning, Bogmoor, it's 10AM on Saturday 4th May

'and we're going to kick things off with a special

'dedication for my brother's birthday.

'This is from your old pal Leonie.

'It's a golden oldie from the '70s, just like her.'

-Well, Mary Berry, how'd the cake turn out?

-I messed up.

DOORBELL

Thanks.

One genius birthday present delivered. You're welcome, Dylan.

Oof.

Who put that there?

Do you know where you are?

Is it just me or does today feel weird?

How would I know? Maybe it's because all your homework's done.

Hey, what's going on?

Surprise!

Wait, I get another party?

Well, that's what birthdays are all about, little man, but...

-Dylan, I ruined your cake.

-And I messed up your present.

-And...

-An Inuit ghost checked into the ghostel,

so that's why Gabe can't be here.

Wait, how did you know that?

I don't know.

Well, anyway, look, there might be one surprise that might just

turn this day around and he goes by the name of DJ T-Rex.

-Well, what do you think?

-I think you should answer your phone.

My phone's not ringing.

MOBILE RINGS

Wait, have you been watching too much Dynamo or something?

It's DJ T-Rex, he can't come here because some cows have

laid down in the middle of the road, causing a traffic jam.

What's happening, T-Rex?

What?!

All right.

Wait, how did you know that? Are we being punked right now?

Wait, he was right?

Every word.

Maybe the science geek's been experimenting

with telling the future.

Well, of course!

I was only joking.

I've got to go.

How'd he know that?

Hey, just hang out with him. I never said I understood him.

-Where is it?

-Sup, birthday boy?

It's not my birthday.

I mean, it is my birthday and yesterday was my birthday.

It was the effect of that experiment you made me do.

Experiment...?

The one with the book of secrets, only now the book's gone missing.

You were probably too excited last night to sleep

because you knew it was going to be your birth...

-Do not say birthday again.

-OK.

Maybe all you need is to get some sleep

and maybe tomorrow will actually be tomorrow and not today and if

tomorrow is today then it's another chance to have a great birth...

A great day.

COCKEREL CROWS

'Good morning, Bogmoor, it's 10AM on Saturday 4th of May.'

Are you kidding me?

'We're going to kick things off with a special dedication...'

-So, Mary Berry, how'd the cake turn out?

-I messed up.

One genius birthday present delivered. You're welcome, Dylan.

Do you know where you are?

Here goes nothing.

Surprise!

Oh, no, not again!

-Why's he not excited about his birthday?

-I don't know.

Happy non-birthday...?

Nope, still my birthday.

So, what are you doing?

Well, I tried researching the paranormal repetition

of single days but I got nothing,

so now I'm learning the Inuktitut language.

That's awesome. It's, erm, a bit weird, but it's awesome.

Look, I thought about what you said and about this being a second,

third and maybe fourth chance to get things right.

So I might as well use it for some good, right?

COCKEREL CROWS

'It's 6AM. That's it from Gabe's Melodium Moments.'

-Hi, Clare.

-Hi, Dylan.

Oh, hey, Kait, I don't suppose you have an old telephone you're

not using? It's for this experiment I'm dying to try out.

-No, but I'll keep an eye out for one.

-Oh, thanks.

DOORBELL

Now to phone DJ T-Rex.

Ah, one genius birthday present delivered. You're welcome, Dylan.

Hi.

-Atka.

-Welcome to Bogmoor, Atka.

Argh!

Gabe, this is Atka, your new ghostel client.

Surprise!

Oh, I didn't see THIS coming!

Oh, thanks, Atka.

A genuine Inuit fishing pole.

Guys.

Ta-da!

-You made that?

-Yeah, all on my own.

-I'm impressed.

-I think we all are.

Here, open this.

I thought you got him a telescope.

I messed up the order, but look how happy he is.

Oh, thanks, guys. I've always wanted one of these.

This birthday could not get any better.

You want a bet? Are you ready?

DJ T-Rex?!

Live in the flesh, little man.

Is Bogmoor ready to party?

# It's my party

# I do, do what I want

# Do, do what I want

# So while you sit and watch me

# I keep dancing alone

# Da-dancing alone... #

-So, good birthday?

-Best one ever!

PARTY HORN TOOTS

# It's my party

# I do, do what I want

# Do, do what I want. #

Enough, already. When do I get my birthday surprise?

When do all 99 of my brothers and sisters get here?

Look, Carlos, you said you didn't want a surprise.

I was lying.

-Oh.

-But I thought you were pretending.

So you really did forget my birthday?

No!

Ta-da!

Surprise! And you said I was bad at acting.

Mmm!

Everyone happy on my birthday - just what I wanted.

The guys pulled off one heck of a party, and I can see why

they were disappointed at the other two birthdays.

-You found it?

-Yeah, mainly because I took it.

I wanted to give you the best birthday ever as your present,

and they say practice makes perfect,

so I made sure you had a lot of practice.

You made me do the experiment on purpose?

-I knew it would put a time freeze on the castle.

-Leonie!

I'm sorry. I thought you liked birthdays.

Yeah, but not three in a row! And how will we undo it?

Don't worry. I've already taken care of that.

Just had to un-stop the pocket watch and unpick the stitches.

Yeah, well, let's hope it works.

I don't think I could do a fourth birthday in a row.

Hey, I think I've just realised why we have one birthday a year.

SHE CHUCKLES

WHISTLE

Right, listen up, troops.

I just want to say a big thank you for helping me

with Dylan's birthday.

Sir, yes, sir. It was our pleasure, sir.

All right, I might get carried away with the role of party planner,

-I get it.

-Just promise me one thing.

-What's that?

-You'll lose the whistle.

Sure thing, Fair Maiden Kaitlin.

Clare, good job on the cake, by the way.

Aw, thanks. You know,

-I might step out of my comfort zone a bit more often.

-No.

Well, that is Atka off again. I'm glad I could help her.

Even taught her a few important words of English -

LOL, YOLO and the selfie.

We was just saying, maybe we can celebrate your birthday next year,

you know, considering it weren't a big deal when you was alive.

Really? Master Rich, can we play hide the slipper

and dance around the maypole?

-Yeah, sure. Let's go crazy.

-Let's go crazy!

And throw! Where's the slipper? I'm backwards!

And spin!