Snowed In Dani's House


Snowed In

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Transcript


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I hate home make-over shows. They're so unrealistic.

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-How can they completely redecorate a room?

-And make it take so long?

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Hmm...

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Ohh, way too busy.

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Black?

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So predictable.

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Oh, time for Dani's House!

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Now who's predictable, hm?

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-Hi, my name's Dani and this is my wonderful...

-I'm Sam.

-Oi!

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-Her best friend.

-As I was saying...

-I'm her best friend too.

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-Toby.

-As I was saying, this is my show.

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-Max!

-That's me. I'm her brother.

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-Get out of it.

-And I'm his best friend Ben.

-As I was saying,

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my name's Dani and this is my show.

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ALL ARGUE

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BABY CRIES

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CRYING STOPS

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Got to change that ringtone.

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It sounds just like a real baby.

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BABY CRIES

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Oops.

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It WAS a real baby.

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All right, all right, it's coming.

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BABY CRIES LOUDLY

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CRYING STOPS

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All right!

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Cold milk. Thanks for the reminder.

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-It's been snowing!

-Oh, whoopee-doo(!)

-I know.

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-Wanna come out and play in it?

-Hmm, let me think...

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Hair like a fuzz ball, nose like a beetroot and ruin these Ugg boots?

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I'm thinking no.

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I never want to get older than ten.

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WIND HOWLS

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I can't believe it.

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We're snowed in!

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Well, on the plus side, the post arrived.

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Thanks.

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Oh! Our first of the snow. Isn't it exciting?

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Fantastic. ..Wait a minute. What actually IS snow?

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I've got no idea.

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Let's find out.

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Is that IT?

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It's not even that white.

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It's not even that cold.

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Just think - there are songs, films,

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and a whole winter sports industry based on this.

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-Earth must be even more boring than we thought.

-Mm.

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-I wanna play snowballs!

-Relax.

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It never settles in this country anyway.

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Looks pretty settled to me.

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A freak wind must've blown it against the door.

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Everywhere else will be clear.

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PHONE RINGS

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BABY CRIES

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PHONE CONTINUES RINGING

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'Hi! We're stuck in a snow drift on the way to Gran's!'

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Everywhere except Gran's.

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'It's fun! We're throwing snowballs at a policeman's helmet!

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'Got to go! There was a policeman under it!'

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Everyone's playing snowballs

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-except me.

-PHONE RINGS AGAIN

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-TOBY:

-'Hi, Mum. Sorry I couldn't get home last night.

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-'Dani made an idiot of herself and I had to look after her.'

-What?

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'Oh, hi, Dani. What are you doing in my house?'

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I'm not. I'm at MY house.

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-'Oh, sorry.'

-Are you and Sam coming over?

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'Oh, no, er...

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'I'm on my way home and Sam's trying out her new ski gear.

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'Shame you couldn't make Debbie's party. Bye.'

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Great. Deserted by parents, abandoned by friends,

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and snowed in big time alone...

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..with...

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-..my brother!

-Stop that, OK?

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MOBILE PHONE RINGS

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-Hello?

-Sam, it's Dani. I want you to drop

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whatever you're doing and come over to my house.

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We've had the heaviest snowfall in memory and it's blowing a gale.

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-I couldn't possibly leave my garden.

-Well, how's this? I'm snowed in

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-with Max!

-OK, don't panic. I'm on my way.

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But what about the snow and the gale?

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If you're home alone with Max, I'll be there, whatever they throw at me.

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THUD Ow!

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-Sam?

-I'm OK.

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-BEEP

-Leave a message.

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Toby, if you don't want your mum to know

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you're not here looking after me,

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you better come and look after me.

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That made more sense in my head.

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Let me in!

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It's for your own protection, Max. I can't be responsible

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-for what happens if I have to spend all day with you.

-You won't.

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-Ben's coming.

-Ben! Of course. We've still got Ben.

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But how will he get here?

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A bit of powder might stop your no-hope mates,

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but nothing defeats the Ben-meister.

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Don't worry, pal. I'm right outside your house.

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Wait a minute. Where IS your house?

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Ben?

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-OK, don't panic, but I think we've lost him.

-You mean

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-he's breaking up?

-No, he can't find the house.

-I knew it.

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It's just going to be you and me.

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-We haven't been alone...

-Since you tried to blow up my bedroom.

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..since you confiscated my chemistry set.

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-It took six weeks for my eyebrows to grow back.

-The fireman said

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he'd never seen an explosion like it.

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The point is we can't be left alone again. It's always carnage.

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We make King Kong versus Godzilla look like a buddy movie.

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TOGETHER: Hello!

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HE-E-E-E-E-E-E-ELP!

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This is a problem of communication.

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You fight because you don't understand one another.

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What's to understand? He's a nuisance.

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-She's a misery.

-So where did it first go wrong?

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-Did you ever play together? Ball games, for instance?

-Constantly.

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Hardly ever.

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We used to play draughts

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but I stopped because he was always cheating.

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We played draughts but she quit - I was always winning.

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You could try PLAYING together again.

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Hello, Toby? Where are you? We've got to get to Dani's house?

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-I think I have to go home.

-Max and Dani are snowed in TOGETHER!

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Oh, that's different. I definitely have to go home.

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-But they'll fight like pit bulls!

-And you want me to separate them?

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-Toby!

-All right, all right, I'll come!

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But I have to change my outfit first.

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I don't know how you can think about changing your outfit

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-at a time like this.

-You will when you see it.

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Well, it can't be worse

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than this joker I've just seen wearing a Hawaiian shirt.

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Toby?

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-You almost made me fall over.

-I saved you, though,

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which isn't easy in these.

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Flip-flops?!

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Let me in! I've got something to show you.

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Oh, come on, Dani. I haven't fallen for that one since I was four.

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PHONE RINGS

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Hello, Ben? Can you hear me?

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Yeah, how's it going, buddy?

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Badly. Dani is older, bigger, and much, much meaner than I am.

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I've only got one hope.

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You've got some hope? Excellent! What is it?

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-It's you!

-Uh-oh! I thought you meant real hope.

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-Look, do you know where you are?

-Yes, I know exactly where I am.

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-Great!

-I've just passed the car-shaped mound,

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-near the ice sculpture of the Loch Ness Monster.

-But where?!

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Are there any landmarks - anything you recognise?

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-Yes! There's some snow!

-Anything else?

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I'm pretty sure the car-shaped mound is a 4x4.

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I'm sunk.

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Toby, hurry. I've got this image of Dani's house going up in flames.

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Oh, great. At least we'll be warm. Can you see my legs?

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Unfortunately, yes. Can't you move them any faster?

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I can't feel anything below the waist!

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-Well, why did you dress for the beach on a day like this?

-I didn't!

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I went to a Hawaiian-themed party last night and I woke up in Finland!

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-Come on! We're lagging behind.

-Oh, I can't go on!

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I feel like a frozen salmon on two ice pops!

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Stop mucking about! You'll have plenty of time to warm up later!

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Here, put this on.

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-Better?

-Mmm, toasty(!)

-Mmm!

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-Agh, agh, ow!

-I've been thinking. We can't go on fighting all day.

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Why not? It's what we always do.

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Max!

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Why do humans fight and argue so much?

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It is a primitive way of solving disputes. We gave it up eons ago.

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I beg to differ. We argue like cat and mouse.

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-Cat and dog.

-Who has been studying Earth expressions for light years?!

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You! And you still can't get the simplest one right!

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Well, that's the pot calling the kettle brown!

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Black! Black!

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Oh, we're not having an argument by any chance, are we(?) Mmm?!

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Not any more we're not.

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-Why should you get the remote?

-Because I'm the eldest.

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-Get off!

-No!

-Let go of it!

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TV SWITCHES OFF

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Oh, no! What've you done?!

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You've killed the telly!

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NO!

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-How can I help you?

-My TV's bust.

-What happened to it?

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My little brother broke it. Oh, he's the most annoying, infuriating...

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-In fact, forget the TV. Can you fix my brother?

-Let's have a look.

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-What's the capital of China?

-Beijing, duh!

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Nothing wrong with brightness.

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-Good picture.

-Except the head's in widescreen.

-Volume?

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-Yow!

-Working loud and clear. What exactly is the problem?

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-Where shall I start? He won't do as he's told.

-Remote control problem?

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-It's a no control problem.

-Is he switched on?

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-Hey! Watch who you're poking!

-Ah...

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There's your problem - a very short fuse.

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Pop in a new one. He'll be right as rain.

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SHE SIGHS

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I know this is gonna sound weird, but something strange is going on.

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-I think the appliances are ganging up on us.

-Dani?

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First the TV, then the computer!

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It's as if they're under the control of some strange power!

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They are! It's called electricity and it's been cut off by the snow.

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No electricity? That means no hot food, no heating!

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It's gonna get dark! We're not gonna be able to see!

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We won't be able to phone!

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-It's dead!

-You're scaring me now. Can you calm down, please?

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You're supposed to be the big sister around here.

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Mobile! Please let it have charge!

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Hello? Sam?

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-Hello, Dani?

-HE SHIVERS

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You've got to help us! It's gone all dark and we're gonna die and...

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Dani? Dani? ..Something terrible's happened.

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Hello? Hello?!

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Sam?

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We've got to hurry, Toby.

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Toby?!

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Will you hurry up? We're rushing for a reason.

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-My flip-flops are stuck in the snow.

-Come on.

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-Sam?

-Look, there's probably a mast down.

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-The news said it was the worst snow in living memory.

-We're doomed!

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No-one's gonna find us. No-one's ever gonna find us!

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If there's anybody out there, we need help!

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This is literally a question of survival!

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So please, if you're out there, send help!

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OK, this is the day we've been waiting for!

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The chance to actually be in Dani's house.

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They'll be so grateful when we burst through the door

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-with our solar light sources and our food wafers!

-I know!

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Change course for Earth...now!

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-Ooh, that's it! We're on our way!

-We are indeed!

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Estimated time of arrival - 1532 hours, 10th of June,

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-3078.

-ENGINES STOP

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OK. Now we have to calm down and think of a plan.

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Why can't I think of a plan?!

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You can't think of a plan, cos your big sister lost it.

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Something's finally made Dani lose it. Isn't that quite cool?

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No, it's scary. It's like there's no-one in charge.

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-Then why don't YOU take charge?

-Me?! I can't allow myself

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to take charge. I'm completely irresponsible.

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But the fact that you know that only shows

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-how completely responsible you actually are.

-Of course!

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-BABY CRIES

-I know you're hungry! We all are!

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Ssh!

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There's no point looking in there. Mum hasn't gone shopping.

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-I'll make lunch.

-With sardines, pickled onions and chilli sauce?

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Good luck. Still, at least we've got baby milk.

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Even if it is freezing cold.

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Right now, try not to think of this as a cold bottle.

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Think of it as a milk lolly.

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-SHE SIGHS

-Could my life be any worse?

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BABY RETCHES

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OK, Maxy boy, this is your big chance.

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-BABY'S CRIES CONTINUE

-There must be something in here.

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The old camping stove! Yes!

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-Max, what've you done?

-I've made lunch.

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I hope it's a four-course meal! There's enough mess for one!

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What's the sound? Is that silence?

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Yeah, it calmed down once I warmed its milk up.

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-How did you do that?

-I used our old camping stove.

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Ha, of course, the camping stove. I was going to suggest that.

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-So we can have hot food, right?

-No.

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The gas ran out after a few minutes. But we can have the Max special.

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Sardines, cheese, pickled onions, chilli sauce and honey.

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That looks disgusting. I wouldn't eat that

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if it was the last sandwich in the world!

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It IS the last sandwich in the world. You've used all the bread!

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-In fact, you've used everything!

-To make our lunch.

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There's not a thing left in the house!

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Wait a minute, there is one thing.

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-Dani, don't!

-I was saving this cake for an emergency,

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which I think has just arrived.

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Max!

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-We're going the wrong way!

-Are you kidding?! They don't call me the boy

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who's quite good at finding his way places for nothing!

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We've passed that tree three times!

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Oh, like...I suppose they're different from each other.

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-I suppose they have their own species, like animals!

-Well, yes.

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-Really?

-Mm-hm.

-Wow.

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For instance, that one behind is a deciduous virginiana.

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-It has its own name?!

-Mm-hm.

-Cool!

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It's really unusual. You rarely see them outside garden cent...

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-We're in a garden centre, aren't we?

-Of course we're not!

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-Dani's house is the next left.

-Where?!

-There, down....

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"Compost £5.99 a bag" Lane.

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-I think we're in the garden centre.

-Duh!

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-Ever since you were a baby, you've made my life hell!

-All right!

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-I'm sorry about the cake!

-It was the last thing left to eat!

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Let's do something to take our minds off, shall we? Let's play a game.

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-You and I play a game together?

-We used to play draughts together.

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-Until you tired of me beating you.

-You never beat me.

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-Mum made me let you win, cos you were youngest.

-Oh, yeah?

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-Well, Mum's not here now, so let's play.

-Fine!

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Oh, yeah, I forgot - no electricity.

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We don't need a computer. Let's kick this out old school...with a board.

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-You have to see five moves ahead to be good at draughts.

-Really?

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-So with our mind-reading abilities...

-Mmm.

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-Oh...

-I win! Best of three.

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OK, let battle commence,

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and may the best sibling win.

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HE CACKLES

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Ha-ha!

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Now, I really don't know why I'm laughing! Ha-ha!

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Ha-ha!

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-You cheated!

-How?

-You took all my pieces.

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-Face it, Dani, you suck at draughts.

-Maybe,

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-but you ate my birthday cake.

-That was a birthday cake?

-Not that one,

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-when I was ten.

-When you were ten,

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I didn't know the difference between a birthday cake and a giraffe.

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Time to let go.

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Maybe you're right.

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Maybe it is time to let go.

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I do suck at draughts.

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But I know a game I definitely don't suck at.

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Blow Pipes.

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MOBILE PHONE RINGS

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-Hello.

-Hello, Ben? It's Sam.

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-Sam, as in Dani's friend, Sam?

-Of course, Dani's friend, Sam!

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Well, I've never had a girl call my mobile before.

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Well, no time for celebration, Ben. Someone's got to get to Dani's house

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-and I'm not sure Toby can make it.

-Oh.

-Are you almost there?

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No, I got lost, so I'm gonna go home and start again.

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-How would you find your way home?

-Well, that's the clever bit,

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I've been crumbling bread behind me all the way,

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-so I can follow the trail back.

-Bread?

-Yes,

0:19:550:19:58

-but I can't seem to find it now.

-You did use brown bread, didn't you?

0:19:580:20:04

-Tell me you didn't use white bread, Ben.

-Incredible, it's disappeared!

0:20:050:20:10

SHE SIGHS

0:20:100:20:12

Now, THAT was fun.

0:20:230:20:26

Fun, yeah, we used to have fun, didn't we?

0:20:260:20:29

I forgot.

0:20:290:20:31

When we were...kids, obviously.

0:20:310:20:34

Yeah, before we knew any better.

0:20:340:20:36

-CRYING

-Oops, baby's crying.

0:20:360:20:39

Must be time for a nappy change.

0:20:390:20:41

-I'll do it.

-Really? Have you seen what's inside one of these things?

0:20:410:20:46

OK, I'll help...

0:20:460:20:49

..with my eyes closed.

0:20:510:20:53

Ball games are so much more fun with gravity.

0:20:550:20:58

Yeah, aren't they?

0:21:030:21:05

Shot.

0:21:080:21:09

You're not hungry, we've just changed your nappy,

0:21:150:21:17

-why are you still crying?

-CRYING CONTINUES

0:21:170:21:22

The baby's cold. We need to warm it up.

0:21:220:21:25

Let's take it camping.

0:21:250:21:27

Camping, when it's snowing a blizzard outside?

0:21:270:21:30

Who said anything about outside?

0:21:300:21:32

We can't go on, my legs are frozen solid!

0:21:350:21:38

But what about Dani?

0:21:380:21:39

Oof!

0:21:390:21:41

Go on without me, Sam, I'm just holding you back.

0:21:410:21:44

It's not your legs that have got frostbite, it's your combats!

0:21:470:21:50

Oh, I knew it. Next, it'll be gangrene in the hip pockets!

0:21:500:21:54

-Leave me, go!

-Oh, no, you're not getting out of it that easily.

0:21:540:21:59

This is cool!

0:22:010:22:04

And, more importantly, warm.

0:22:040:22:06

If only we had food, I'd be almost happy.

0:22:060:22:09

I was saving it, but...

0:22:090:22:12

-go on.

-The Max special?

0:22:120:22:16

I couldn't.

0:22:160:22:17

OK, if you insist.

0:22:180:22:21

This is totally and utterly...

0:22:230:22:25

delicious.

0:22:250:22:27

SMASH!

0:22:290:22:30

That sounds bad.

0:22:300:22:31

Give it to me straight, Sam,

0:22:310:22:33

will I have to lose a trouser leg?

0:22:330:22:35

Urgh!

0:22:350:22:37

Today's made me realise that you're not such a bad sister.

0:22:390:22:43

And it's made me realise I'm not either. But then again,

0:22:430:22:46

-I thought I was great all along.

-If anything happens,

0:22:460:22:49

I want to make sure that Ben gets my vintage train collection.

0:22:490:22:52

I don't think he'd have much competition.

0:22:520:22:54

And I want you to have my worm farm.

0:22:540:22:57

Thanks, I'm touched.

0:22:570:22:59

Right, I'm going to sleep, I am whacked.

0:22:590:23:02

-Do you think the baby'll be warm enough in here?

-With four babygrows,

0:23:020:23:07

three blankets and a sleeping bag,

0:23:070:23:09

any warmer and it'll turn to steam! PARP!

0:23:090:23:14

Excuse me, I know this sounds crazy, but...

0:23:190:23:21

-you don't know where Dani's house is, do you?

-Follow us, Ben.

0:23:210:23:25

Sam! Oh, great!

0:23:250:23:27

You saved my life!

0:23:270:23:28

What's your dog's name?

0:23:280:23:30

Toby!

0:23:310:23:33

I know someone called Toby, can I stroke him?

0:23:330:23:35

-I wouldn't.

-Grr!

0:23:350:23:37

SNORING

0:23:390:23:40

Food...

0:23:400:23:41

Food...

0:23:430:23:44

Burger, please.

0:23:470:23:48

-The usual?

-No, actually. Can I have that topped with sardines, cheese,

0:23:480:23:52

-pickled onion, chilli sauce and honey?

-Interesting combination.

0:23:520:23:56

-Someone made it for me in a sandwich.

-Oh, yeah, new friend?

0:23:560:24:00

No, actually, it was my little brother.

0:24:000:24:02

Little brother?

0:24:020:24:04

Yeah, right! This must be a dream.

0:24:040:24:07

Have a nice day...

0:24:070:24:09

I mean, night.

0:24:090:24:10

Oh, no, it was a dream!

0:24:140:24:16

What?

0:24:160:24:18

The burger,

0:24:180:24:19

it was juicy and meaty and...

0:24:190:24:21

I can't stand this!

0:24:210:24:24

There's gotta be food somewhere.

0:24:240:24:26

I'm going out...

0:24:260:24:27

and I may be gone some time.

0:24:270:24:30

-Oof!

-Agh!

0:24:300:24:31

A tent in the living room, what's this doing here?

0:24:360:24:40

The police often put one up over...

0:24:400:24:42

the scene of a crime!

0:24:420:24:44

Toby, I think we're too late.

0:24:440:24:47

-For one of them.

-But...

0:24:470:24:49

which one?

0:24:490:24:51

Oh, it's you!

0:24:540:24:56

OK, I know you're not real...

0:24:570:25:00

I'm gonna eat it anyway.

0:25:000:25:02

Dani, we're here to help you. Where's Max?

0:25:040:25:08

Yeah, what have you done...

0:25:080:25:10

-with the body?

-OK, I don't mind eating hallucination,

0:25:100:25:14

-but I'm not gonna talk to one.

-Dani, it's me, Toby.

0:25:140:25:18

With the blue jumpsuit and a Hawaiian shirt? Yeah, right!

0:25:180:25:21

This jumpsuit is my skin.

0:25:230:25:25

We trekked through the snow to stop you guys from killing each other.

0:25:250:25:29

To try and stop you, anyway.

0:25:290:25:31

But if you're alive, that means...

0:25:310:25:34

Max!

0:25:340:25:35

Oh, Max, the best friend a boy could have!

0:25:350:25:38

I'd sacrifice anything to see you one last time!

0:25:380:25:41

Oh... Hi.

0:25:420:25:44

Cheers, this'll do.

0:25:440:25:45

-Where's the pizza?

-I was starving!

-Great, some sacrifice you made!

0:25:470:25:51

So, you're both fine?

0:25:510:25:54

And I almost froze to death for nothing.

0:25:550:25:57

Yeah, we've been worried sick. What have you two been doing all day?

0:25:570:26:01

What have we been doing? Well...

0:26:010:26:04

It's been awful, erm...

0:26:070:26:09

Excuse me a minute.

0:26:090:26:10

OK, we fought all day, never played games and we certainly never sang

0:26:130:26:17

-We'll Be Coming Round The Mountain. Agreed?

-What's it worth?

0:26:170:26:20

Agreed!

0:26:200:26:22

Oh, you got here in the nick of time!

0:26:230:26:25

-Another second, I'd have gone for him with the guy-rope.

-You can get

0:26:250:26:29

-guy AND girl ropes?

-Oh... Hand me that pizza.

0:26:290:26:32

-But that's Dani's.

-It's OK, he can have the last slice.

-Huh?

0:26:320:26:36

It had a fly on it anyway.

0:26:380:26:40

Everything's back to normal, they're fine.

0:26:400:26:43

-What a great show.

-Mmm.

-Just right to go off to a deep sleep with.

0:26:460:26:51

-Already?

-Your nuclear-powered hotty-botty's getting cold!

0:26:510:26:55

OK.

0:26:550:26:57

Hmm, artificial 99!

0:26:590:27:02

Yes, sleep well.

0:27:020:27:03

See you in the computer-simulated morning.

0:27:030:27:07

Ah, peace at last!

0:27:090:27:11

No matter how well you get on,

0:27:110:27:13

you can't beat a light year or two of me-time.

0:27:130:27:16

Me-me-me-me-me...

0:27:160:27:19

SNORING

0:27:190:27:21

Ah...

0:27:210:27:23

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0:27:290:27:32

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0:27:320:27:36

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