Beast of Black Island and Bumbly Poo Farm Diddy Movies
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Transcript
| Line | From | To | |
|---|---|---|---|
Lights, camera, action. | 0:00:02 | 0:00:04 | |
# We're Diddy Dick and Dom | 0:00:04 | 0:00:05 | |
# And we're so excited | 0:00:05 | 0:00:07 | |
# Our showbiz careers have been reignited | 0:00:07 | 0:00:11 | |
# We've made it on to the silver screen | 0:00:11 | 0:00:13 | |
-# With our Diddy Movies -You're living the dream | 0:00:13 | 0:00:17 | |
# We were down on our luck | 0:00:17 | 0:00:19 | |
# We were burnt out stars | 0:00:19 | 0:00:20 | |
# Flipping burgers and washing cars | 0:00:20 | 0:00:23 | |
# We waved goodbye to all our cares | 0:00:23 | 0:00:26 | |
# Hello to Hollywood premieres | 0:00:26 | 0:00:30 | |
# This time next year you'll be millionaires | 0:00:30 | 0:00:33 | |
# Go Diddy Movies | 0:00:33 | 0:00:35 | |
# Yeah.# | 0:00:35 | 0:00:38 | |
It's Friday night! It's seven O'clock! It's half past... | 0:00:38 | 0:00:42 | |
Flipping watch! | 0:00:42 | 0:00:45 | |
You join us at the premiere of another Diddy Movie! | 0:00:45 | 0:00:50 | |
Tonight, monster mayhem in The Beast Of Black Island! | 0:00:50 | 0:00:53 | |
Warning - Not suitable for MINERS. | 0:00:53 | 0:00:56 | |
Excuse me, thank you. | 0:00:56 | 0:00:58 | |
Hey, Larry! | 0:00:58 | 0:00:59 | |
What happened to your faces? | 0:00:59 | 0:01:02 | |
Oh, filming in Hawaii, luvvie! Luvvie! | 0:01:02 | 0:01:06 | |
-Luvvie. -Catching some rays. | 0:01:06 | 0:01:09 | |
Finishing the movie. Did we finish it? | 0:01:09 | 0:01:11 | |
Shall I apply the sunscreen, sweetie? | 0:01:11 | 0:01:14 | |
In your own time, love. | 0:01:14 | 0:01:16 | |
Right, let's roll this thing! And it needs to be hot! | 0:01:16 | 0:01:18 | |
Like my sausage! | 0:01:18 | 0:01:20 | |
-It's starting. -It's starting! | 0:01:22 | 0:01:25 | |
'Diddy Movies presents - The Beast Of Black Island.' | 0:01:25 | 0:01:33 | |
Pull the main line! Climb the rigging! Make me a blancmange! | 0:01:38 | 0:01:46 | |
# Dummy, dummy, dummy, dummy, dum, dum DUM! # | 0:01:47 | 0:01:55 | |
CRASHING AND CLATTERING | 0:01:55 | 0:01:58 | |
It's not easy being Sir Ranulph Roundtree, | 0:01:59 | 0:02:03 | |
the world's greatest explorer. | 0:02:03 | 0:02:04 | |
You? Pah! | 0:02:04 | 0:02:07 | |
I Captain Horatio Bilge am the world's greatest explorer. | 0:02:07 | 0:02:12 | |
I discovered the lost dodo of Devon. And I ate it. | 0:02:12 | 0:02:16 | |
I discovered the mythical mongoose of Methuselah. And ate it. | 0:02:16 | 0:02:23 | |
Well, I discovered the elusive kitten of Kiri-te-kiwijuice. | 0:02:23 | 0:02:29 | |
I thought that was extinct? | 0:02:29 | 0:02:33 | |
It is now! Delicious! | 0:02:33 | 0:02:34 | |
BOTH: Aaaaargh! | 0:02:36 | 0:02:38 | |
Cobblers! | 0:02:45 | 0:02:47 | |
I'm going to discover the greatest discovery ever discovered! | 0:02:47 | 0:02:50 | |
Since they discovered the Discovery Channel. | 0:02:50 | 0:02:54 | |
I, Sir Ranulph Roundtree, will capture the beast of Black Island. | 0:02:54 | 0:03:02 | |
ALL: Ooh! | 0:03:02 | 0:03:06 | |
Piffle! | 0:03:06 | 0:03:07 | |
I, Horatio Bilge, will capture the beast of Black Island. | 0:03:07 | 0:03:13 | |
Abandon ship! There's a d-d-d-d-d-d... | 0:03:16 | 0:03:20 | |
DUCK! | 0:03:20 | 0:03:22 | |
THEY SCREAM | 0:03:22 | 0:03:26 | |
# Bobbing along, bobbing along on the bottom of the beautiful briny sea | 0:03:45 | 0:03:53 | |
# What a chance to get a better peep | 0:03:53 | 0:03:58 | |
# At the plants and creatures of the deep | 0:03:58 | 0:04:01 | |
# We glide far below the rolling tide | 0:04:01 | 0:04:08 | |
# Serene, through the bubbly blue and green | 0:04:10 | 0:04:17 | |
# It's lovely bobbing along singing a song | 0:04:17 | 0:04:21 | |
# On the bottom of the beautiful briny | 0:04:21 | 0:04:26 | |
# Shimmery shiny beautiful briny sea. # | 0:04:26 | 0:04:31 | |
Horatio?! Horatio?! | 0:04:35 | 0:04:39 | |
Horatio, come here now! | 0:04:39 | 0:04:42 | |
Horatio?... | 0:04:45 | 0:04:47 | |
No-o-o! | 0:04:49 | 0:04:50 | |
Oh, it's you! | 0:04:52 | 0:04:53 | |
It is! | 0:04:53 | 0:04:54 | |
You're alive! | 0:04:54 | 0:04:57 | |
Now don't run off again! | 0:04:57 | 0:04:58 | |
But I'm an h-explorer. | 0:04:58 | 0:05:02 | |
From now on, we will h-explore, together. | 0:05:02 | 0:05:05 | |
H-explore this! | 0:05:05 | 0:05:08 | |
No! You explore this! | 0:05:08 | 0:05:11 | |
Explore that! | 0:05:11 | 0:05:13 | |
PAN PIPES PLAY | 0:05:14 | 0:05:17 | |
Will you stop that?! | 0:05:20 | 0:05:26 | |
Thank you. | 0:05:26 | 0:05:27 | |
A-haagh! A-hugh! A-haagh! | 0:05:27 | 0:05:31 | |
I think he's a native. | 0:05:31 | 0:05:34 | |
-Oh... -Let me do this. | 0:05:34 | 0:05:37 | |
I am fluent in four million languages, including goat. | 0:05:37 | 0:05:40 | |
A-haagh! A-hugh! Hoo-hoo. Ha-hagh. | 0:05:40 | 0:05:46 | |
A-hagh. A-hagh. | 0:05:46 | 0:05:47 | |
I think she said "jungle flaps" | 0:05:47 | 0:05:51 | |
SHE COUGHS | 0:05:51 | 0:05:55 | |
Sorry, I was just clearing my throat. Welcome, travellers. | 0:05:55 | 0:05:58 | |
This is my island. | 0:05:58 | 0:06:01 | |
Seems very nice. | 0:06:01 | 0:06:04 | |
'180!' | 0:06:06 | 0:06:09 | |
State your purpose. What have you come here for to Black Island? | 0:06:14 | 0:06:18 | |
This is Black Island?! | 0:06:18 | 0:06:20 | |
Wait. If this is Black Island, then that must be... | 0:06:20 | 0:06:26 | |
What? | 0:06:26 | 0:06:28 | |
The beast? | 0:06:28 | 0:06:29 | |
LAUGHTER | 0:06:32 | 0:06:35 | |
Will you stop laughing?! It's supposed to be scary. | 0:06:35 | 0:06:40 | |
Quickly, we must leave. | 0:06:43 | 0:06:45 | |
I'm not going anywhere! This is my greatest discovery yet. | 0:06:45 | 0:06:50 | |
This is MY greatest discovery. | 0:06:50 | 0:06:52 | |
-Shall we share it? -OK. | 0:06:52 | 0:06:53 | |
-Beastie! -Oh, Beastie! | 0:06:53 | 0:06:57 | |
I beg you! The beast is sacred. | 0:06:57 | 0:06:59 | |
If you disturb it, terrible things will happen. | 0:06:59 | 0:07:01 | |
-Whatever. -Precious one, forgive us for what we have done. | 0:07:01 | 0:07:07 | |
Friends? | 0:07:09 | 0:07:12 | |
SCREAMING | 0:07:12 | 0:07:16 | |
Hooray! | 0:07:16 | 0:07:18 | |
Quick, it's getting away! | 0:07:22 | 0:07:24 | |
I can see me Nan's house! | 0:07:31 | 0:07:34 | |
Whoo-hoo! | 0:07:43 | 0:07:45 | |
SHE SCREAMS | 0:07:48 | 0:07:50 | |
'Wait a second. Houston we have a...' | 0:07:53 | 0:07:57 | |
-What's happening? -Erm, I think it's still hungry! | 0:08:03 | 0:08:06 | |
You can't eat us. | 0:08:06 | 0:08:08 | |
-I'm your dad! -What? | 0:08:08 | 0:08:11 | |
Dad! | 0:08:11 | 0:08:13 | |
-And I'm your mum. -Mum. | 0:08:13 | 0:08:17 | |
This is incredible. | 0:08:17 | 0:08:19 | |
Incredible. | 0:08:19 | 0:08:21 | |
-Amazing! -Amazing | 0:08:21 | 0:08:25 | |
We can make him say anything we want him to! | 0:08:25 | 0:08:29 | |
Bum! | 0:08:29 | 0:08:30 | |
Bum! | 0:08:30 | 0:08:33 | |
Egg trump! | 0:08:37 | 0:08:38 | |
Egg trump | 0:08:38 | 0:08:41 | |
Tacky pants. | 0:08:43 | 0:08:45 | |
Potty pipes. | 0:08:45 | 0:08:47 | |
Fairy hammock. | 0:08:47 | 0:08:51 | |
This is the happiest day of my life! | 0:08:51 | 0:08:54 | |
I'd pay good money to see this. | 0:08:54 | 0:08:56 | |
Wait a minute! That's it! | 0:08:56 | 0:08:58 | |
We'll take this show on the road! | 0:08:58 | 0:09:04 | |
-We'd make a fortune! -Yes, luvvie! | 0:09:04 | 0:09:08 | |
He'd be the biggest comedy sensation the world has ever seen! | 0:09:08 | 0:09:12 | |
Right, you big, fat pink pom-pom! | 0:09:12 | 0:09:16 | |
-We're going to make you a star! -Plop! | 0:09:16 | 0:09:20 | |
APPLAUSE | 0:09:20 | 0:09:22 | |
My Lords, ladies and gentlemen, Ma'am. | 0:09:25 | 0:09:29 | |
What you are about to witness will change the course of history | 0:09:29 | 0:09:34 | |
and bring you to question the very nature of existence. | 0:09:34 | 0:09:38 | |
Persons of a nervous disposition put their head in a bag, | 0:09:38 | 0:09:43 | |
because we, Roundtree and Bilge bring to you | 0:09:43 | 0:09:46 | |
what will surely be known, as the eighth wonder of the world! | 0:09:46 | 0:09:51 | |
AUDIENCE GASPS | 0:09:51 | 0:09:55 | |
Wee-wee gas. | 0:09:55 | 0:09:58 | |
Bum chutney. | 0:09:58 | 0:10:01 | |
Fart-o-rama. | 0:10:01 | 0:10:03 | |
APPLAUSE | 0:10:03 | 0:10:05 | |
My guest this evening has, | 0:10:08 | 0:10:09 | |
in the last few days risen to the very top of the showbiz ladder. | 0:10:09 | 0:10:12 | |
With his own unique brand of biting wit | 0:10:12 | 0:10:14 | |
and satire he has redefined the comedy landscape. | 0:10:14 | 0:10:18 | |
Big Pink Monster, what is the secret to your extraordinary success? | 0:10:18 | 0:10:24 | |
Hairy onion poo pants. | 0:10:24 | 0:10:27 | |
LAUGHTER | 0:10:27 | 0:10:29 | |
Yes, we can have him with you at ten o'clock on Tuesday, | 0:10:36 | 0:10:39 | |
that'll be £10,000 and a Creme Egg. | 0:10:39 | 0:10:44 | |
Chapter 3 - Splatty burp juice. Poo pate. | 0:10:44 | 0:10:48 | |
Sweaty booby. | 0:10:48 | 0:10:53 | |
What are we going to do? We haven't had a booking for him in ages. | 0:10:56 | 0:11:01 | |
Nobody's interested any more! | 0:11:01 | 0:11:03 | |
I know, luvvie, | 0:11:03 | 0:11:04 | |
it's ever since those street dancing worms came on the scene. | 0:11:04 | 0:11:08 | |
What are we going to tell HIM? PHONE RINGS | 0:11:08 | 0:11:11 | |
Hello. Roundtree and Bilge, | 0:11:17 | 0:11:19 | |
International Big Pink Naughty Monster Agency. | 0:11:19 | 0:11:22 | |
Yes, yes, yes. No! | 0:11:26 | 0:11:29 | |
I'm not interested in changing my electricity supplier. Goodbye. | 0:11:29 | 0:11:31 | |
ROARING AND CRASHING | 0:11:31 | 0:11:33 | |
We're still waiting to hear about that panto in Stoke-on-Trent! | 0:11:36 | 0:11:41 | |
THEY SCREAM | 0:11:41 | 0:11:45 | |
It was just a dream. Must have been all those coconuts we ate. | 0:11:45 | 0:11:52 | |
LOUD FOOTSTEPS I thought we were going to be... | 0:11:52 | 0:11:58 | |
THEY SCREAM | 0:11:58 | 0:12:02 | |
What the...? | 0:12:02 | 0:12:05 | |
Oh, phew! It was just a dream. | 0:12:05 | 0:12:08 | |
Must have been that roasted weasel we ate. | 0:12:08 | 0:12:11 | |
So there was no storm. | 0:12:11 | 0:12:13 | |
We never even went to Black Island! | 0:12:13 | 0:12:16 | |
Yep, sorry, old chum. | 0:12:16 | 0:12:19 | |
But maybe, if we keep searching, one day we might find the... | 0:12:19 | 0:12:22 | |
ROARING | 0:12:22 | 0:12:23 | |
THEY SCREAM | 0:12:23 | 0:12:24 | |
What the...? | 0:12:24 | 0:12:26 | |
Oh, phew! It was just a dream. | 0:12:26 | 0:12:29 | |
Must have been all that gerbil cheese we ate. | 0:12:29 | 0:12:32 | |
So we never did go on the ship? | 0:12:32 | 0:12:34 | |
And we never did find the beast. | 0:12:34 | 0:12:36 | |
Well, we'll just have to keep on exploring, Horatio. | 0:12:36 | 0:12:41 | |
Because I believe that it does exist. | 0:12:41 | 0:12:43 | |
And one day, we will capture the beast of Black Island! | 0:12:43 | 0:12:48 | |
Well, Larry, what did you think? | 0:12:58 | 0:13:02 | |
COUGHING | 0:13:10 | 0:13:13 | |
Isn't that annoying? | 0:13:13 | 0:13:15 | |
PHONES RING | 0:13:15 | 0:13:17 | |
How insensitive! | 0:13:19 | 0:13:20 | |
AUDIENCE CHATS | 0:13:22 | 0:13:24 | |
How very rude! | 0:13:24 | 0:13:26 | |
SOMEONE BURPS | 0:13:26 | 0:13:28 | |
Eggy and intrusive! | 0:13:28 | 0:13:29 | |
BAND PLAYS | 0:13:29 | 0:13:32 | |
That's just so inconsiderate. | 0:13:34 | 0:13:36 | |
Will you please all just... | 0:13:38 | 0:13:39 | |
And enjoy the movie. | 0:13:44 | 0:13:46 | |
HE CHOKES | 0:13:50 | 0:13:52 | |
I know. It's so exciting. | 0:13:52 | 0:13:56 | |
I've got an ice cube stuck in my throat. | 0:13:56 | 0:14:00 | |
DICK AND DOM: Brain freeze. | 0:14:00 | 0:14:01 | |
Sshhh! | 0:14:01 | 0:14:03 | |
It was a hot summers day | 0:14:04 | 0:14:07 | |
and I was off to stay with my favourite uncle at Bumbly Poo Farm. | 0:14:07 | 0:14:12 | |
# I'm such a happy kitty | 0:14:17 | 0:14:19 | |
# So pleased to leave the city | 0:14:19 | 0:14:22 | |
# Yes, I am a talking cat | 0:14:22 | 0:14:24 | |
# There's nothing at all weird about that | 0:14:24 | 0:14:26 | |
# Talking animals are the norm | 0:14:26 | 0:14:29 | |
# Here on Bumbly Poo Farm | 0:14:29 | 0:14:31 | |
# Hello, Uncle | 0:14:31 | 0:14:33 | |
# Nephew, dear, I think you're going to like it here | 0:14:33 | 0:14:35 | |
# Flowers sing wherever they blossom | 0:14:35 | 0:14:37 | |
# My underpants hum cos I never wash 'em | 0:14:37 | 0:14:40 | |
# Primary colours all over the place | 0:14:40 | 0:14:42 | |
# Even the sun has a smile on his face | 0:14:42 | 0:14:44 | |
I'm flipping sweltering | 0:14:44 | 0:14:46 | |
# Everyone's jolly and everyone's friends | 0:14:46 | 0:14:48 | |
# Everyone's happy as the fun never ends | 0:14:48 | 0:14:52 | |
# Everything's so very cute | 0:14:52 | 0:14:54 | |
# You may feel the need to puke | 0:14:54 | 0:14:56 | |
THEY VOMIT | 0:14:56 | 0:14:57 | |
-# No-one never comes to harm here on Bumbly Poo Farm. -# | 0:14:57 | 0:15:05 | |
-Did they just...? -No. | 0:15:10 | 0:15:11 | |
Thank you for inviting me to stay on your farm, Uncle Tom. | 0:15:11 | 0:15:15 | |
That's OK. I'll be glad of the help. | 0:15:15 | 0:15:18 | |
Help? Nobody said anything about any help. | 0:15:18 | 0:15:22 | |
You'll love it. Working on a farm is enormous fun. | 0:15:22 | 0:15:26 | |
By fun, I mean back-breakingly hard work. | 0:15:26 | 0:15:29 | |
How about a bowl of lovely cream? | 0:15:29 | 0:15:33 | |
Cream? | 0:15:33 | 0:15:35 | |
-Oh, I love cream. -That's the way, little Jess. | 0:15:39 | 0:15:43 | |
You'll be needing this. | 0:15:43 | 0:15:46 | |
No. Not to wipe your face with. | 0:15:54 | 0:15:56 | |
It's your list of chores. | 0:15:56 | 0:15:58 | |
Milk the cows, tidy up the field, stir the cream. Blimey! | 0:15:58 | 0:16:01 | |
What did you last slave die of?! | 0:16:01 | 0:16:04 | |
Lactose intolerance. | 0:16:04 | 0:16:06 | |
I'm off down the market. | 0:16:06 | 0:16:08 | |
You'd best get cracking with this little lot. | 0:16:08 | 0:16:11 | |
Whatever you do, | 0:16:11 | 0:16:13 | |
don't visit the diseased old oak tree at the bottom of Misery Field. | 0:16:13 | 0:16:18 | |
Why would I want to do that? | 0:16:18 | 0:16:20 | |
The bushes, they are only covered in gobstoppers. | 0:16:20 | 0:16:22 | |
The flowers are made of liquorice. | 0:16:22 | 0:16:24 | |
The trees are covered in chocolate noggins. No reason to go there. | 0:16:24 | 0:16:30 | |
No reason at all. | 0:16:30 | 0:16:31 | |
Did you say "chocolate noggins"? | 0:16:31 | 0:16:35 | |
Then there's the Diddy Station games console. | 0:16:35 | 0:16:38 | |
With the brand-new Bumbly Poo Farm game. | 0:16:38 | 0:16:42 | |
-Product placement, that is. -The game's rubbish. They always are. | 0:16:42 | 0:16:46 | |
Whatever you do, don't go down there. | 0:16:46 | 0:16:49 | |
Now get on with your chores. Bye. | 0:16:49 | 0:16:52 | |
Right, where's that tree? | 0:16:54 | 0:16:56 | |
GAMES CONSOLE MUSIC | 0:16:56 | 0:16:59 | |
'This is brilliant.' | 0:16:59 | 0:17:00 | |
It's not. | 0:17:00 | 0:17:02 | |
'It's just like being in the film.' | 0:17:02 | 0:17:06 | |
It isn't. | 0:17:06 | 0:17:07 | |
'Being on the farm is so much fun.' | 0:17:07 | 0:17:12 | |
Did someone say fun? | 0:17:12 | 0:17:13 | |
Agh! | 0:17:13 | 0:17:16 | |
Hiya! If it's fun you're after, then I'm your guy! | 0:17:16 | 0:17:20 | |
I'm the Bumbly Poo from Bumbly Poo Farm. Pleased to meet you! | 0:17:20 | 0:17:24 | |
-Pleased to meet you... -Ow! | 0:17:24 | 0:17:27 | |
Sorry. Anyway, I'm Jess. | 0:17:27 | 0:17:29 | |
I never realised there was a real Bumbly Poo. | 0:17:29 | 0:17:32 | |
Why do you think this place is called Bumbly Poo Farm? | 0:17:32 | 0:17:37 | |
I just thought it's cos my uncle's got a dickie tummy. | 0:17:37 | 0:17:40 | |
No, no. That's called a poobly bum, | 0:17:40 | 0:17:42 | |
that's something very different. Hey! Jess! | 0:17:42 | 0:17:44 | |
Would you like to be my friend? | 0:17:44 | 0:17:46 | |
A Bumbly Poo is about the most magical friend you could ever have! | 0:17:46 | 0:17:50 | |
# There's lots of fun things you can do | 0:17:50 | 0:17:52 | |
# When you're friends with a Bumbly Poo! | 0:17:52 | 0:17:55 | |
# Poke a frog with wet bamboo | 0:17:55 | 0:17:56 | |
# Play a welly boot kazoo | 0:17:56 | 0:17:58 | |
# Fill your uncle's hat with stew | 0:17:58 | 0:18:00 | |
# There's so much to do! | 0:18:00 | 0:18:01 | |
# Fly through space in a Portaloo | 0:18:01 | 0:18:04 | |
# Practise custard cream Kung Fu | 0:18:04 | 0:18:06 | |
# Wash your hair with cheese fondue | 0:18:06 | 0:18:07 | |
# There's so much to do! | 0:18:07 | 0:18:09 | |
# When you're friends with a Bumbly Poo | 0:18:09 | 0:18:11 | |
-There's just so many fun things you can do. -# | 0:18:11 | 0:18:13 | |
Wow! That was the most fantastically fun five minutes I've ever had. | 0:18:17 | 0:18:21 | |
Anyway, I'd best get on with my uncle's chores. | 0:18:21 | 0:18:24 | |
No, no, wait! | 0:18:24 | 0:18:26 | |
I could help you with your chores. Make them a bit more fun. | 0:18:26 | 0:18:29 | |
You know - do them the Bumbly Poo way! | 0:18:29 | 0:18:32 | |
And if not, I'll sting you on the nose and make you cry. | 0:18:32 | 0:18:35 | |
Sorry, what was that? | 0:18:35 | 0:18:37 | |
Nothing, dear. Go and get the chores and I'll have a look. | 0:18:37 | 0:18:39 | |
Go on! Off you go! | 0:18:39 | 0:18:41 | |
OK, let's have a look. | 0:18:48 | 0:18:50 | |
They all look easy peasy squeezy weasy! | 0:18:54 | 0:18:58 | |
You think? | 0:18:58 | 0:19:00 | |
I don't know. I can't read. | 0:19:00 | 0:19:02 | |
Come on! Let's go and annoy some cows! | 0:19:02 | 0:19:05 | |
You want me to milk these udders? With these claws? | 0:19:08 | 0:19:13 | |
Let's make it fun - the Bumbly Poo way! | 0:19:13 | 0:19:17 | |
What the...? That's my face! | 0:19:26 | 0:19:28 | |
You always said you wanted to be in the movies! | 0:19:28 | 0:19:31 | |
Lock and load, Jess! | 0:19:31 | 0:19:34 | |
LAUGHTER | 0:19:43 | 0:19:44 | |
Yes! | 0:19:46 | 0:19:48 | |
We have a winner! | 0:19:48 | 0:19:50 | |
AUDIENCE GASPS | 0:20:00 | 0:20:02 | |
What? I'm a cat! | 0:20:02 | 0:20:05 | |
In dungarees. | 0:20:05 | 0:20:07 | |
So, what's next, my old pal? | 0:20:07 | 0:20:10 | |
We've got to clean the field of the cow pats. | 0:20:10 | 0:20:14 | |
Let's play Frisbee! | 0:20:16 | 0:20:18 | |
That's not helping! | 0:20:20 | 0:20:22 | |
No! But it IS fun! | 0:20:22 | 0:20:25 | |
Come on, sour puss-puss! Why don't you join in! | 0:20:26 | 0:20:29 | |
JESS SCREAMS | 0:20:42 | 0:20:44 | |
Not dry yet?! | 0:20:44 | 0:20:46 | |
Not dry yet. | 0:20:46 | 0:20:49 | |
Don't worry. There's plenty more fun to be had on Bumbly Poo Farm! | 0:20:49 | 0:20:53 | |
I'm not sure I like you much any more. | 0:20:53 | 0:20:56 | |
We've got to turn this milk into cream. | 0:20:56 | 0:20:59 | |
That's easy with a bit of Bumbly Poo magic. | 0:20:59 | 0:21:04 | |
No! We'll just use these whisks, OK? | 0:21:04 | 0:21:07 | |
Are you sure? | 0:21:07 | 0:21:09 | |
I could simply do...this! | 0:21:09 | 0:21:12 | |
No! | 0:21:15 | 0:21:17 | |
What about this?! | 0:21:17 | 0:21:21 | |
No! | 0:21:21 | 0:21:23 | |
How about this?! | 0:21:23 | 0:21:25 | |
No! How's that helping? | 0:21:29 | 0:21:32 | |
Oh, you don't need my help? I thought we were friends. | 0:21:32 | 0:21:35 | |
I guess not. | 0:21:35 | 0:21:37 | |
# The kitchen is a mess | 0:21:39 | 0:21:41 | |
# And all the milk's been spilled | 0:21:41 | 0:21:45 | |
# When Uncle Tom gets back | 0:21:45 | 0:21:48 | |
# I'm going to get killed | 0:21:48 | 0:21:52 | |
# But as I stand and look around | 0:21:52 | 0:21:55 | |
# And sing my sad sad song | 0:21:55 | 0:21:58 | |
# At least I can be sure | 0:21:58 | 0:22:01 | |
-# There's nothing else that can go wrong. -# | 0:22:01 | 0:22:05 | |
Oh, Jess. | 0:22:09 | 0:22:11 | |
You didn't think I'd leave you like this, did you? | 0:22:11 | 0:22:14 | |
What? You're going to put everything right with your Bumbly Poo magic? | 0:22:14 | 0:22:17 | |
No! | 0:22:17 | 0:22:19 | |
I'm going to make sure it looks like it was you! | 0:22:19 | 0:22:22 | |
Bye! | 0:22:25 | 0:22:26 | |
What happened here then?! | 0:22:30 | 0:22:32 | |
You wouldn't believe it if I told you. | 0:22:32 | 0:22:34 | |
Oh, what? Did an irritating fairy-tale creature, | 0:22:34 | 0:22:38 | |
I don't know, something like a giant psychedelic bee, | 0:22:38 | 0:22:42 | |
fly out of a diseased oak tree and make your life a misery? | 0:22:42 | 0:22:46 | |
Yes! | 0:22:46 | 0:22:47 | |
Oh, yeah. I thought so. He has a habit of doing that. | 0:22:47 | 0:22:50 | |
Annoying poo-head! | 0:22:50 | 0:22:51 | |
I think it's about time that we taught him a lesson. | 0:22:51 | 0:22:56 | |
So! You've decided to forgive me, have you! | 0:23:02 | 0:23:06 | |
Oh, yes. | 0:23:06 | 0:23:07 | |
My uncle and I wanted to show you there was no hard feelings. | 0:23:07 | 0:23:10 | |
Sit yourself down...pal! | 0:23:10 | 0:23:11 | |
So, what's for dinner? | 0:23:11 | 0:23:15 | |
You! | 0:23:15 | 0:23:16 | |
About 20 minutes on 200 degrees should do the trick. | 0:23:19 | 0:23:23 | |
AUDIENCE GASPS | 0:23:23 | 0:23:25 | |
Oh! Moreish! | 0:23:29 | 0:23:32 | |
Yes. Like popcorn. | 0:23:32 | 0:23:34 | |
So, have you learned your valuable lesson, little Jess? | 0:23:34 | 0:23:37 | |
Oh, yes, Uncle. | 0:23:37 | 0:23:39 | |
# If you have an annoying chum | 0:23:41 | 0:23:44 | |
# And you don't know what to do | 0:23:44 | 0:23:47 | |
# Don't just sit there feeling glum | 0:23:47 | 0:23:49 | |
# We've got some good advice for you | 0:23:49 | 0:23:54 | |
# Eat your friends Eat your friends | 0:23:54 | 0:23:56 | |
# When you're at your wit's end | 0:23:56 | 0:23:58 | |
# When they drive you round the bend Eat your friends | 0:23:58 | 0:24:01 | |
# Eat your mates Eat your mates | 0:24:01 | 0:24:04 | |
# When they make you feel irate | 0:24:04 | 0:24:06 | |
# When they're starting to grate Eat your mates | 0:24:06 | 0:24:10 | |
-# Steam 'em! -Boil 'em! | 0:24:11 | 0:24:13 | |
# Make a kebab | 0:24:13 | 0:24:16 | |
# Stew 'em! Broil 'em! | 0:24:16 | 0:24:18 | |
# Crack 'em like a crab! | 0:24:18 | 0:24:20 | |
BOOING AND GROANING | 0:24:20 | 0:24:22 | |
# Griddle them! Grill them! | 0:24:22 | 0:24:25 | |
# Fry 'em like an egg | 0:24:25 | 0:24:27 | |
# Roast them! Bake them! | 0:24:27 | 0:24:29 | |
# Chew on their legs | 0:24:29 | 0:24:32 | |
# When they drive you round the bend | 0:24:32 | 0:24:34 | |
# The fun you have will never end | 0:24:34 | 0:24:38 | |
# When you eat... | 0:24:38 | 0:24:40 | |
# Your... | 0:24:40 | 0:24:43 | |
# Friends! # | 0:24:43 | 0:24:46 | |
Get your computer games! Bumbly Poo computer games! | 0:24:56 | 0:25:01 | |
Bumbly Poo masks! Strap-on stingers! | 0:25:01 | 0:25:05 | |
Cow pat Frisbees! | 0:25:05 | 0:25:07 | |
Bumbly Poo on a stick? | 0:25:07 | 0:25:09 | |
SHOUTING AND BOOING | 0:25:16 | 0:25:19 | |
I cannot believe I have just sat through that! | 0:25:31 | 0:25:34 | |
Outrageous! | 0:25:34 | 0:25:36 | |
I am ruined. Ruined, I tells ya! | 0:25:38 | 0:25:41 | |
But we've got another idea for a movie. | 0:25:41 | 0:25:44 | |
Yes, and this one's all about saucepans. | 0:25:44 | 0:25:48 | |
Maybe I'm dreaming. | 0:25:51 | 0:25:53 | |
A film about saucepans. | 0:25:53 | 0:25:58 | |
I hate it, I hate it, I hate it! | 0:25:58 | 0:26:02 | |
Here's the money. | 0:26:02 | 0:26:04 |