Episode 18 Gigglebiz


Episode 18

Comedy sketch show for younger viewers. Cave dwellers Ug and Ig celebrate Ig's birthday, and Nana Knickerbocker and her pantomime cow cause chaos at the garden centre.


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Transcript


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# Na-na na-na na-na Gigglebiz

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# Na-na na-na Ho-ho-ho

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# Na-na na-na na-na Gigglebiz

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# Na-na na-na Here we go! #

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Ho-ho!

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Coming up on Gigglebiz...

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Keith Fitt,

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Captain Adorable,

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Farmer Dung,

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Nana Knickerbocker,

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and here's Enrique Pasadoble!

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TANGO MUSIC PLAYS

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Hello there, Farmer Dung.

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Oh! He'rro there!

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What are you up to today?

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We've got a radio-controlled wheelbarrow!

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The Turbo 3001 Wheelbarrow?

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-What does it do, Farmer Dung?

-Watch this.

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Right, hold tight! Look.

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VROOM!

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Look, I can make him go forwards...

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There he goes.

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I can make him go backwards.

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Hi, Raj!

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Ha-ha! And I've got a turbo button!

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Watch this. Ready?

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There we go! Hi, Raj!

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CRASH!

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You all right, Raj?

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Oh! Here's Raj! Oh! Raj, where you been?

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Ha-ha-ha! Come and look! Raj!

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Ha-ha-ha!

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Ha-ha! Oh, Raj!

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I don't believe you!

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You are funny, Raj!

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Do you want another go?

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Well, that's the last

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of Captain Adorable's toys cleared away, QT.

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Ah! Greetings, crew!

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Ha-ha! Now, today...

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Argh!

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Now, today, is a very special day.

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It's big, Bottom. Ha!

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You see, we have a special visitor.

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Yes, the Ambassador...

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Argh!

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A little bit of cape trouble here.

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Ah!

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Ah, well, well done, team.

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Now, it's important that we impress our special visitor today.

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Ambassador... Uh, what's his name?

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Hot dog, Captain?

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Ah, yes, of course, Bottom. Ambassador Hot Dog.

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I'll see if he's on his way.

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Ambassador, can you hear me?

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It's Captain... Hello? There's no-one there.

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-Perhaps you can't get signal.

-Ah, right. Of course.

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I'll just adjust the aerial.

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Ambassador, it's Captain Adorable. How are you? Hello?

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There's still no-one there! Which can only mean one thing!

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He's here already!

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Oh!

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Ambassador Hot Dog! Oh! Welcome, welcome.

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Thank you for visiting our humble ship.

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Ambassador, allow me to show you around...

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Argh!

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What's going on? Where's the Ambassador?

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-He's fine, Captain, he's fine.

-Bottom, thank you.

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Ambassador, I apologise.

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Where were we? This is Bottom, of course, and this is our bridge...

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Argh! Oh!

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Who put this chair here? Ambassador?!

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-He's fine, Captain.

-So sorry.

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Ambassador hasn't got any time to chat, Bottom. Honestly!

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He's on a tight schedule. Ambassador Hot Dog, I apologise.

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Here is the bridge and our scientific expert, QT.

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Ah!

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Oh, no, he's stuck down the suction hole. We must save him.

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Which button is it, QT? I'm trying to save him!

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Ah-ha! Problem solved.

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-Ambassador Hot Dog?

-I've got him. He's fine.

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Perhaps the Ambassador would like to go home now.

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Yes, I think you might be right there, Bottom.

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He's had a busy day, of course. Farewell, Ambassador Hot Dog.

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Safe journey.

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You know, Bottom,

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I don't believe that was the real Ambassador, after all.

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I think the real Ambassador's name is...

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-Gateau, Captain?

-Yes, exactly. Ambassador Gateau!

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Yes, I'll give him a call straightaway, see if he's on his way.

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Hello?

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-There's no-one there.

-No!

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This is the Captain. All is well.

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And now it's time for your giggles!

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Where do lions get their clothes?

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I don't know.

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The JUNGLE sale.

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And now the latest from the world of sport. It's Keith Fitt!

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Ya-way! Keith Fitt here!

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Today, we're working in the gymnasium!

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Now, I've been working in here for over 20 years,

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so I know what I'm talking about. Today, I'm going to show you

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how to do the straddle vault. You hurl your body over the vault

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and land on the other side safely.

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This is one of my prodigies, Vanessa.

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I've been working with her for over 20 year, too.

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Taught her everything she knows. She's going to demonstrate.

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Vanessa, take it away, pet.

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Not bad, eh? Although we can work on that landing a bit.

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You know, just technique.

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Now I'm going to show you how to do it properly. A pro, like.

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Cos I've been jumping over vaults for over 20 year,

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so I know how to jump.

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It's all in the preparation. OK, here we go.

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Gymnastics away, man! Come on! Let's have ya!

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Oh, no!

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Oh, man. Easy, pet. OK, yeah, I can do it.

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Oh, man, bit sore.

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And that's how you straddle vault.

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Next week, we're going to be working on the beam.

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Champion.

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It's silly time!

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This is the home of Ug and Ig,

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where almost everything is made of rock.

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Hi! Hi, Ig. Oh!

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Hello, Ug. It's Ig's birthday today.

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Oh! Yeah!

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-Do you like his pebble people?

-Shh!

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(Over there. Surprise!)

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Ig, Ig!

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Don't look! Go on, off you go.

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Over there, go on. Out of the way.

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Ig, Ig, Ig!

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Go on, outside to play.

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Has he gone? Ah, good.

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-Have you got Ig a present?

-Oh...

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-Ta-da!

-A rock. Of course.

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That's what all the paper and string is for. You're going to wrap it up.

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Oh, yeah.

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Right...

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Ta-da!

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Ug, I think Ig's on his way back.

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Oh, Ig! Ig! Wait...

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Ug, you've left the present on the table.

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Sorry, Ig.

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Ah, Ig's found it.

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But what can he do with a big rock, Ug?

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Hang on!

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Yeah!

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Of course.

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Ug's made a big pebble person for your little pebble people, Ig.

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Now they're a family.

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Well done, Ug. Well done, Ig.

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Ah, thanks.

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-Hi!

-Hi, Justin!

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-Knock, knock.

-Who's there?

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-Alex!

-Alex who?

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Alex-plain later. Bye!

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Bye, Justin!

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And now, Nana Knickerbocker in today's panto -

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Jack And The Beanstalk!

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Oh, I say! Plants, trees...

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Oh, it must be Jack And The Beanstalk.

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Oh, and here he is, young Jack. Hello, young Jack.

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I suppose you and your mother have no food for the table. Aw!

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No, we're fine. We had fish and chips last night.

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I'm sure that's not your line. Never mind. We'll carry on.

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Your mother sent you out into the big wide world

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to sell your prized cow, didn't she, Jack?

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My name's Kieran.

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Oh, deary me. It's Jack, it's Jack. We're losing them!

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I suppose you sold your cow for some magic beans, didn't you, Jack?

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Um, I didn't.

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Oh, yes, you did!

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Oh...no, I didn't.

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Yes, you did. Remember? There's your beans.

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Remember, they grew into a huge beanstalk. Here it is.

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And, Jack, you know what's at the top of the beanstalk!

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It's a...

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Oh, dear, it's the giant!

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-TANNOY:

-Staff announcement.

-Oh, and there he is now!

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Jack, he's after you. You'd better run.

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Would Kieran come to till 4, please? That's Kieran to till 4.

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-Yeah, I'd better run.

-Oh, good idea, Jack. Run, Jack!

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Run back to your mother!

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Oh, and don't forget this, look! Take the golden goose! There we are.

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It's the giant's but he'll never know. Off you go!

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-Right, um, I'll put this through the till.

-You what?

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Oh, that Jack, he's a silly boy, isn't he?

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Honestly! Selling his cow for a bunch of magic beans.

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I would never do that to Daisy. By the way, where is Daisy?

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Has anyone seen her? Daisy?

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I mean, I don't... Ooh!

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I say, there you are, my darling.

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Excuse me, madam.

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There are no cows allowed in the garden centre.

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Oh, it's the giant, everyone! Look out! Big...

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You're quite small, aren't you?

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I was expecting someone very big with lots of hair.

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You look like the box office manager. Oh, dear. Quick, run, Jack! Let's go!

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Flee! Run for your lives! Daisy!

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Moo!

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Come back here!

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Come back!

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-Come back!

-Come on, Jack! We're almost there. You can do it!

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Oh, I'm out of puff.

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Go on, run home, young man! Run back to your mother!

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Oh, I do like a happy ending.

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Well done. Yes, good show. Take a bow, everyone.

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Thank you!

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Come on, Daisy. Next show in two hours. And get some stilts.

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Look a bit more ooh-gianty.

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# Gigglebiz, Gigglebiz We've had a lot of fun

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# Gigglebiz, Gigglebiz Ho-ho-ho

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# Gigglebiz, Gigglebiz And now it's time to go

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# Gigglebiz, giggle It's time to go!

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# Cheerio, ta-ta Bye-bye

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# Farwell, TTFN

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# We all hate to say goodbye

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# But we'll be back again

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# Na-na na-na na-na Gigglebiz

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# Na-na na-na Ho-ho-ho

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# Na-na na-na na-na Gigglebiz

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# Na-na na It's time to go

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# Gigglebiz, Gigglebiz We've had a lot of fun

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# Gigglebiz, Gigglebiz Ho-ho-ho

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# Gigglebiz, Gigglebiz And now it's time to go

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# Gigglebiz, giggle It's time to go! #

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Ho-ho!

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Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

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Flamboyant ballroom dancer Enrico Paso Doble gets rather peckish during his dance routine, Farmer Dung shows off his new turbo-powered wheelbarrow, Captain Adorable entertains a cuddly Ambassador Hotdog on his spacecraft, fitness guru Keith Fitt demonstrates his gymnastics skills, cave dwellers Ug and Ig celebrate Ig's birthday, and Nana Knickerbocker and her pantomime cow cause chaos at the garden centre.

The show also features the Gigglekids - children from all around the country telling their favourite jokes; and Justin joins children onscreen for the best knock knock jokes. Finally there's some silly dancing fun in silly time!


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