Episode 18 Gigglebiz

# Na-na na-na na-na Gigglebiz

# Na-na na-na Ho-ho-ho

# Na-na na-na na-na Gigglebiz

# Na-na na-na Here we go! #

Ho-ho!

Coming up on Gigglebiz...

Humphrey,

Nana Knickerbocker,

Rapids Johnson,

but, first, it's Keith Fitt.

IN GEORDIE ACCENT: Yeah, way. Keith Fitt, here.

And welcome to Keith Fitt - It's A Record, Man.

OK, bairns. Now, today I'm going to attempt to juggle

the most teddy bears ever.

Champion! And these are my two judges over here.

HE CLEARS HIS THROAT

Now, it is a given. I mean, you've even written it down here.

I've been juggling teddies for over 20 years. So, I know how to juggle.

Right, Keith, you've got to juggle as many teddies as possible. OK?

-Let's get juggling.

-In three, two, one... Begin!

WHISTLE BLOWS

Yeah, way, man. Here we go.

I'll start off with three. Oh, skills. Juggling skills.

Let's do the rest of them. Here we go...

Huh, huh, huh. He-he, huh huh...

Away, man. Skills! Whoo hoo!

That way. Champion!

OK, bairns. Let's see how I got on.

So, did I break the world record?

-No, Keith.

-Sorry, Keith.

And that's how you juggle teddies. Champion!

CALMING MUSIC

CLOWN MUSIC

SOOTHING MUSIC

HE YAWNS

HE SNORES

HE SNORES LOUDLY

Avast, Captain Crackers,

we've been marooned for months on this desert island.

Not a living soul for thousands of miles

and we've run out of food and drink.

-SQUAWKS

-Ooh...

Ha-hargh! Look, Captain Crackers. Provisions have arrived.

We're saved! Ha-hargh.

Can I have somes of your cake? Ha-hargh.

SQUAWKING

-Knock, knock.

-Who's there?

-One.

-One who?

No, it's one, TWO!

THEY CHUCKLE.

COCKEREL CROWS

# La-la-la-lala-la la-a-a-a

# La-la-la-lala-la l-o-o-o. #

Ho-ho. The sun is shining, the birds are singing.

And Nana's panto farm shop is looking wonderful.

Isn't it, everybody?

-Sure is, Nana.

-Oh, it's a tough crowd here. Must be a matinee.

-Ooh! Here comes a customer.

-Oh, hello.

-I'd like two pints of milk, please.

-Yes, of course.

We get our fresh milk from our cow...

-MOO

-..Daisy.

Don't mind her, everybody. She just gets a bit MOODY!

-Hah! MOODY!

-DAISY MOOS

-You can help yourself.

-Me? I can't milk a cow.

Oh, all right. Dandini, come on, get milking. That's it.

-No way.

-Why not?

-Because Daisy doesn't like being milked.

Oh, yes, she does.

DAISY MOOS

-Oh, no, she doesn't.

-Oh, yes, she does.

Oh, no, she doesn't.

-Well, come on. Join in.

-TOGETHER:

-Oh, yes, she does.

-Look, I just want two pints of milk.

-Oh, all right. I'll do it.

-Come here. Daisy! No!

-DAISY MOOS

After her, everybody. Hurry up, come on. Come here, you.

DAISY MOOS

CHICKENS CLUCK

CRASH

DAISY MOOS

Stop. Stop, Daisy. Stop all this running around.

We're exhausted. Now, look, all we want is some milk.

Otherwise, this lovely lady won't have any milk for her cornflakes.

Aww... Well, come on. It's worse than that.

-TOGETHER: Awww.

-Well, join in.

-ALL: Awww...

-Yes.

Ooh... What's Daisy up to?

Oh, of course. There you are.

-Fresh milk, ice-cold, straight from the cow.

-Thanks.

Oh, I do love a happy ending.

Take a bow, everyone. Good show, good show.

Keep smiling, keep smiling.

DAISY MOOS

And now it's time for your giggles.

-Why was the man running round his bed?

-I don't know.

Because he wanted to catch up with his sleep.

THEY LAUGH

DRUM ROLL

Hey!

Hey!

HE YAWNS

-ALL:

-Hey!

CIRCUS MUSIC

BOING!

Hey!

HE YAWNS

Hey!

FANFARE

BOING!

Hey!

HE SNORES

DRUM ROLL

FANFARE

Hey!

TOGETHER: Hey!

Hey...

HE SNORES

It's silly time!

MUSIC: If You Go Down To The Woods Today

-Delicious.

-SHOUTING:

-Oh, hello.

Shh... (Hello.) Rapids Johnson, here. And I'm deep in the forest

on the trail of the famous bedtime bear.

HE YAWNS

Sorry about that. Now, this bear only comes out after dark.

So, I need to stay awake

if I'm to catch a glimpse of this beautiful nocturnal creature.

And, of course, old Rapido has brought plenty of supplies.

Let's take a look, shall we? First of all

we have a huge mountain of bickies. Delicious.

I have my torch. Essential.

And then... Agh!

You gave me a fright.

Don't worry, everyone. It's just my old teddy bear. This is William.

-Say hello, Will.

-IN FUNNY VOICE:

-Hello! Shh...

-HE WHISPERS:

-Hello.

Right, shouldn't have to wait long.

We just need to stay awake long enough to see the...

HE SNORES

MUSIC: If You Go Down To The Woods Today

BEDTIME BEAR CHUCKLES

Shh.

Yum!

-HE BITES NOISILY

-Wah! Whoa.

What is it? En garde. Oh, sorry about that.

Must have nodded off for a second.

I know, I'll have a lovely warm drink and a bickie.

Don't want to risk missing the bedtime bear, do we?

Lovely. Mm...delicious.

Now, I'll just... Oh, thank you very much.

-How civilised.

-You're welcome.

Right, as I was saying, the most important thing

is to stay wide awake, because we don't...

HE SNORES

RAPIDS CHUCKLES

I do love you, Teddy. Good old Will.

I'll find that bear, or my name is not...

Rapids...

Johnson.

That's right, Johnson. Good teddy. I do love you.

THEY SNORE

And we wish the Chapmans all the best

for their 50th wedding anniversary. Wonderful times.

And that's it for today.

I'm Arthur Sleep and this is Sir Tedward Bearheart

And since it's the end of the show,

well, it's time to go home and get some sleep.

-Say good night, Teddy.

-IN TEDDY'S VOICE:

-Good night.

Night, Doreen. Would you lock up for me? Take care.

# Gigglebiz, Gigglebiz We've had a lot of fun

# Gigglebiz, Gigglebiz Ho-ho-ho

# Gigglebiz, Gigglebiz And now it's time to go

# Gigglebiz, giggle It's time to go!

# Cheerio, ta-ta Bye-bye

-# Farewell, TTFN

-Arrivederci

# We all hate to say goodbye

# But we'll be back again

# Na-na na-na na-na Gigglebiz

# Na-na na-na Ho-ho-ho

# Na-na na-na na-na Gigglebiz

# Na-na na It's time to go

# Gigglebiz, Gigglebiz We've had a lot of fun

# Gigglebiz, Gigglebiz Ho-ho-ho

# Gigglebiz, Gigglebiz And now it's time to go

# Gigglebiz, giggle It's time to go! #

Ho-ho!