Episode 8 Hacker's CBBC Top Ten

Hacker's CBBC top ten!

# Oh, top ten! #

Mmm, yes!

How do, cockers, one and all?

It's me, Hacker.

I've been asked to do a countdown of my top ten CBBC shows.

I told them that I've got a top 43

but they said every episode of Hacker Time doesn't count, cockers!

So pull up a bean bag and come in

but do forgive the mess, yes, it's gone everywhere.

At number four, it's Dennis The Menace And Gnasher.

This is a show all about a rancid boy and his rancid dog.

The boy's terrible hair is matched only by his terrible voice.

I say "terrible" because he sounds a lot like

a certain Christopher Johnson, yes!

Nevertheless, it's well known in showbusiness circles

that Yonko and I are the very best of friends.

Even though he feels threatened by my talent

and I feel sickened by his very existence,

but we do get on famously.

Well, I get on more famously

because, well, I'm more famous, aren't I?

I'll never forget the first time Yonko walked into the CBBC office.

I said, "Are you the new lava lamp cleaner?"

He laughed and said no.

I said, "In that case, you must be the new lav, love."

He didn't laugh at that, though.

But after he'd scraped everything off his shoes

we formed a friendship that can never be broken.

-MOBILE RINGS

-Hang on, who's this? Hang on.

'Hello-o-o-o!'

Yonko, I've told you never to phone me!

No, I don't want to watch

17 hours of Doctor Who outtakes with you, ever!

Good day to you, madam!

Love you(!)

As I was saying, our friendship can never be broken

and that's why in my top ten list of CBBC shows

Dennis The Menace And Gnasher is number four.

Yeurgh!