Episode 8 Hacker's Olympic Rundown

Episode 8

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Time for more of my Olympics nonsense.


Union Jack faced man enjoys gymnastics.


Commentator smuggles chicken into booth.


And, Ore Oduba let down by his only fan.


Jason Kenny equalled Chris Hoy's record of six Hold medals


But the race did have to be restarted twice after this pizza


delivery boy took a wrong turning and ended up on the track.


I wonder which mooey gave him those directions?


One deep pan meat paste and spinach feast.


Now, go back to Rio and make me another.


Jason's race was delayed for so long that the spectators started to camp


Regular viewers will remember Clare Balding's back receiving a lot


Got a lovely photograph of Clare's back there. That's a good one, isn't


it. Well, it made Jason Kenny's back


very jealous, so it suddenly tried Mind you, that in turn


really upset his bottom. They really follow you


around the Velodrome. But Jason's bottom wasn't the only


thing that was sad. Why do people keep dropping


in to me? It was also a historic


night for Laura Trott My roving reporter, Wilf,


has been close to the action. Wilf, did you know that Laura


and Jason are engaged? I've been trying to get hold of them


all night for an interview. They're probably on the phone


and planning their wedding. I was also impressed


that the commentators were watching Hacker's Olympic


Rundown between races. might have to do it on your own.


Maybe another three minutes. Oh, well, I wonder what


Laura thought? I'm sure Clare Balding has enjoyed


all the jokes we've made her. Did anyone see that discus player


visit those cameramen in prison? Don't worry, guys, I've smuggled


a file inside this discus. Do you know what I really find


enjoyable? She's nearly fallen over, she like


it is though. Gymnastics next, and there


was a tinkler on the floor. Don't worry, it was Team GB's


Amy Tinkler, who won Bronze You thought I was going to do


a joke about tinkling Well, I'm better than that -


so shame on you! Anyway, I did like the new medal


podium they used last night. There you have confirmation of the


Women's Floor Finals. Mind you, the competition looks


like it's taking its toll on Simone Simone Biles drive for five came to


an end today. And now it's time for my


favourite lingering shot We can see your feet at the moment,


which is lovely. We were treated to the mother


of all pole vaulting competitions. And, I'm very pleased to say that


we're about to be treated to the mother of all pole


vaulting competitions, too. Hello, I'm the mother


of all pole vaulting competitions. It looks like my new


pizza's on its way. Let's go and eat this meat paste


and spinach pizza. I've also invited Jason Kenny's


distressed bottom from earlier. Right, by my reckoning,


there's only one unresolved joke Turns out I'm not better


than that after all!


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