Edinburgh Jedward's Big Adventure


Edinburgh

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Transcript


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-Fire!

-Today, it's Braveheart or bust as Jedward guide a bunch

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of tourists through the ancient streets of Edinburgh.

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-Let's do this.

-And compete to be the best tour guide.

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BOTH: There's no place like Scotland. There's no place like Scotland.

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Their job is to use any means.

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Who wants to squeeze my bubo?

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..to pass on their newly-found knowledge...

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Witches were burned here?!

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..onto the unsuspecting public.

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CHEERING

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Who will be king of the castle and who will be the auld reekie rascal?

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-I think I'm going to wee my pants.

-Don't wet yourself.

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# Come with us there's so much to discover

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# With me and my brother

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# We dig up things and they freak you out

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# Jedward's Big Adventure

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# To be a tour guide there's so much to do

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# There's a whole planet out there and it's just for you

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# You never know what you'll find and it'll mess with your mind

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# Hair raiser, trail blazer totally wild

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# Jedward's Big Adventure... #

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-BOTH: Three, two, one...

-Jedward are on a mission

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to visit our biggest attractions

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and compete against each other to become the best tour guide.

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Each, with help from a celebrity friend... Do I look like a raven?

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-And today's assignment has taken them north.

-Yeah!

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-We're in Edinburgh, Scotland.

-Home of the haggis.

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-Oh, gross!

-Play some bagpipes, go!

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HE PIPES

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Look, let's open it. It says, "Dear Jedward. Welcome to Edinburgh.

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"In 24 hours,

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"you'll each have to give a group of tourists a guided tour.

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-"Whoever gives the worst tour will have to do a very messy forfeit."

-No!

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BOTH: Eww!

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-John, I think we need to get some help.

-I know who we need to pick.

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-We need somebody who knows all about deadly missions.

-Like...

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-Hi, Jedward.

-It's Wilkinson from Live And Deadly.

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We'll also need somebody who knows all about castles.

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Like someone from Harry Potter, for instance?

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Yeah. I know Chris Rankin, AKA Percy Weasley.

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-Hi, guys. Hi, Jedward.

-What do you know about Edinburgh?

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It's in Scotland.

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It's got a big castle.

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I think we'll get the experts in. You guys relax while we go get the facts.

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Let's go, Edward.

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So the boys' challenge is simple, they have 24 hours to find out

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everything about Edinburgh before tomorrow.

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They'll compete to give the best guided tour.

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Today is the boys' only chance to get the info.

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Where better to start than the castle?

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What's up?

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I'm John. He's Edward and together we are Jedward. What's your name?

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-It's John.

-I'm John as well.

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His name's John so that means that you're both called John.

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-Spooky.

-OK, John, what is this place?

-This is Edinburgh Castle.

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This is volcano that you're on top of.

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340 million years ago, Edinburgh was one big erupting volcano.

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When it became extinct, it became a huge rock and in around 600AD,

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a Celtic tribe built the first ever fortress on top of it.

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This was replaced by a castle in around 1130AD.

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Over the next 300 years was rebuilt,

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and extended, becoming the world famous castle we see today.

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I can't believe there was a volcano here.

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What if one day, the volcano went...and the castle went...

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-and it was all, like...?

-It's extinct. You're in no danger at all.

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Phew, that's a relief, but there is another crisis to deal with.

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It's so windy here, our hair's trying to fight the wind. What do we do?

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You just have to put on a lot of hairspray.

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So now that they're fixed their hair

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and found out all about the castle's origins,

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they're heading into the dungeons in search of their next tale.

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Wow, it's cool.

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-Is this like a prison?

-It is a prison.

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If I was a prisoner, I'd be sleeping down here.

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You'd be sleeping down here

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and it'd be a lot more crowded than it is now.

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-Can we get into a hammock?

-Course you can.

-Go, John.

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This is so crazy.

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# I'm in a hammock Ha-ha-ha-ha-hammock

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# Chilling in a hammock I'm in a hammock

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# Ha-ha-ha-ha-hammock... #

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All I know is this isn't safe. If I was sleeping here, I'd fall out.

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You've got to sway, that's the whole point.

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The boys might be having fun, but, back in the day,

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being locked up here was anything but fun

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as a group of pirates were to discover.

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In February 1720, the Scots stopped a suspicious-looking ship

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the Eagle off the Argyll coast.

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Aboard were 21 pirates along with a hoard of stolen treasure.

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The pirates were imprisoned in the castle for six months.

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Seven were released

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while the rest were hanged to serve as a warning to

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any more pirates thinking of causing any more trouble on the seas

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around Scotland.

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-Can you give us your best pirate impersonation?

-Ar-r-rgh, matey!

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-Ar-r-rgh, matey!

-Oh-h!

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Edward might need to practise his ar-r-rghs before tomorrow's tour.

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Get a move on, boys. You've got so much more to discover.

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Come on, John and John.

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In 24 hours, Jedward will be guiding tourists

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around the castle themselves. Each assisted by a celebrity helper.

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John will be with Naomi and Edward with Chris.

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Hang on. It's not fair. You've got an advantage.

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Being in Harry Potter, you know all about witchcraft and wizardry

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and castles and things.

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-Well, yeah.

-What deadly animals are in Edinburgh Castle?

-Rats.

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Don't worry, Naomi.

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There are lots of live and deadly rats coming up next

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as Jedward are about to find out.

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-Beneath the city lies a warren of hidden streets.

-This is so sick.

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They'd better watch out.

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It's so scary!

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DOOR CREAKS

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That looks like hay. Was there horses down here? Was there cow...

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Oh!

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It's just a rock.

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-Who are you? Are you a ghost?

-No, I'm James.

-Ghost test.

-You can touch me.

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Stop that now. That's probably enough.

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No, no, we can't walk through,

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but I'd like to tell you about this place.

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Do you know we're on a street?

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This was completely open to the sky.

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People used to live here?

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They did, but you have to remember they didn't have proper toilets.

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-Where did they go to the toilet?

-They had buckets.

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You pick up your bucket, carry it to the door

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and you throw it out with a cry of gardyloo!

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Gardyloo!

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Watch out for my poo!

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It comes from French. It's beware of the water.

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What they don't know is that the losing team tomorrow will be

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gunged by buckets of false poo representing gardyloo.

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Which won't be nice, will it?

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You can imagine the diseases here, can't you?

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-Yeah.

-Particularly, we get to the plague.

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Why is he wearing a beak? It that a crazy Halloween costume?

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That man is a plague doctor and he's trying to treat the plague.

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Bubonic plague was carried by rats and fleas.

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The first sign you were infected was horrible boils

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appearing on your neck and armpits.

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Then black spots would appear on your body.

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Time to call the plague doctor.

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Seeing someone dressed with a beak on their head

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might not have been much help.

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Edward, why are you day dreaming?

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Can you still get the plague? I sometimes get spots.

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All you need nowadays is antibiotics to stop the plague.

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-What if I use exfoliating kits and spot stuff?

-That won't help.

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It might cover up what's there but you'll still be ill.

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Don't worry, boys. A few pimples doesn't mean you've got the plague.

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They are halfway through finding out the facts.

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Three, two, one, fire!

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That's so cool!

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In Edinburgh, lunchtime certainly goes off with a bang.

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When the one o'clock gun goes off.

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It's now less than 24 hours until

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they'll compete to be the best tour guides.

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The winning team will be decided when the tourists are tested

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and the boys have no idea what questions they'll be asked.

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Now the boys need to find out about Scotland's famous tartan.

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-What is tartan?

-This is tartan.

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Criss-cross, mixed squares, thousands of different designs.

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-What colours?

-That would depend on where you were in Scotland.

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Originally, many of the tartan colours

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would have been sourced from local ingredients.

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The weaver would use gypsywort to make something green,

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seaweeds for a flesh colour and whelks for the colour purple.

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Scotland's famous heather would be used for yellow, dark green

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and an orangey brown.

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Finally, they would use berries to make the colour blue.

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Edward! What makes a traditional outfit?

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Start with a kilt, socks that we call hose, a sporran.

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-So that's a spurn... Sporran.

-Sporran.

-It's a sporran, boys.

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-And you'll need to remember that for tomorrow.

-Sporran is a man purse.

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It's a pocket because, in normal kilts, there are no pockets.

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-What's that called?

-That's just a waistcoat.

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-Can we try some on?

-You're welcome.

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While Jedward dress for the part, celebrity helpers Naomi and

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Chris are worried are worried about the roles they'll play tomorrow.

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Jedward are a bit mad.

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I reckon they might have some crazy things up their sleeves for us.

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-Like?

-I don't like to think about it, really.

-Go!

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-Whoa!

-Whoa!

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This is Irish dancing.

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Macarena, Macarena!

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MUSIC: "Macarena" by Los Del Rio

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Edward, if we ever want to back to Scotland, we just

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put our kilts on and spin around and go, there's no place like Scotland.

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There's no place like Scotland.

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But, boys, would you want to come back after this?

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Their next location is a spooky one.

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What do you think we're doing here?

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All I know is there must be ghosts here.

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There's loads of graves and it's really scary.

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-And it's raining.

-I think I'm going to wee my pants.

-Don't wet yourself.

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It's so scary. Maybe this lady can help us.

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-What's going on?

-Welcome to one of many Edinburgh graveyards.

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I'm here to tell you about body snatchers.

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Body snatchers, what's that?!

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In the 19th century, medical schools were all over Edinburgh,

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but they didn't have enough bodies for the students to cut up

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so the body snatchers would dig up the freshly-buried dead

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and take the corpses to the doctors.

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The doctors would pay these men £7.

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Sometimes, within a few hours of a body being laid to rest,

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body snatchers would have it back out of the ground again.

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The situation got

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so bad that watch towers had to be built in the graveyards.

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Some families went to far as protecting their loved ones

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by locking them up in an iron casket called a mortsafe

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Which was fine, just as long as the person wasn't still alive.

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What else can you tell us?

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Well, so great was the fear of being buried alive

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that the dead would be buried with a bell attached to them.

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And if the poor soul awoke,

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they could pull the rope and ring the bell to summon help.

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-Knock knock!

-Who's there?

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Dead person, but not dead.

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It's the way you tell 'em!

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It's raining, it's pouring, let's hope Jedward are not snoring.

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-They're about to be bewitched by the last story.

-What are we doing here?

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Follow me around the corner.

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-What is this place?

-Read the first line.

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"This fountain, designed by John Duncan,

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"is near the site on which many witches were burned at the stake."

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Witches were burned here?

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Edinburgh was the witch-burning capital of Europe.

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In the 16th century, 300 women were burned as witches here.

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Whoa!

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The suspected witch would have their wrists and ankles tied together,

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and they'd be thrown into the loch, which was an open sewer.

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If they sank and drowned, they were innocent.

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If they floated and survived, they were in league with the devil

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and must be burned at the stake for being a witch.

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-I'm not a witch!

-ANYONE could be a witch.

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If someone didn't like you, you were left-handed,

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-you had a cat, you had red hair.

-That's crazy.

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They thought that witches controlled the weather,

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that storms and rain were caused by witches.

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I can't believe witches control the weather!

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Look, it's snowing!

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-You must be a witch! You've got to be burned!

-No, that's Dave!

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-He's a witch!

-Burn him! Get the witch!

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-We've got to get out of here.

-Well, that's it.

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The twins have heard all the stories.

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Now it's back to Jedward HQ.

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I don't want to do this tomorrow

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because I'll be too scared to tell the tourists the tour.

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Man up, boys.

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It's time to meet up with your celebrity helpers

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and find out which stories you'll be recreating tomorrow.

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-We've got pirates. That's really good.

-I can wear this.

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-What's your best impersonation of a pilot?

-Arrrrrrrr!

-Really good.

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-Your tasks tomorrow are the volcano castle.

-Brilliant!

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Were going to bring this to the tourists,

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put all the stuff in, and pffff!

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Next one, plague.

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You know when you get a minging spot on your face?

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-I've got one here.

-And there's gunge everywhere.

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How about we make fake sports?

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-Our second mission is explaining a "sparran".

-Sparran.

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-Sparran.

-Sporran. OK, I'll probably say that first.

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-The next one's grave robbers.

-Grave robber?!

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I'm going to get you to get into this dress here, and bury you alive.

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I've been thinking. I've done all this. What have you done?

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-You get creative, OK?

-Great.

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It's going to be a sleepless night for our celebrities.

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Morning! It's 6am on the big day.

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A party of unsuspecting tourists are on the way to the Scottish capital,

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and the celebrities are suffering from last-minute jitters.

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I am quite nervous cos

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if we don't get the facts right, we could end up looking really stupid.

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I hope that doesn't happen.

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I'm a little nervous, but it'll be fine.

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At least I don't have to get in a grave, unlike some people.

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The tourists are expecting to be taken around ancient Edinburgh,

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but they have no idea who their tour guides are going to be.

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This lot are in for the surprise of their lives.

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-I'm John!

-I'm Edward!

-And together we are Jedward!

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J to the E to the D to the WARD! Are you excited? Really excited?

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Are you scared?

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We've got two celebrity friends. Chris Rankin from Harry Potter!

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AKA Percy Weasley. Wooo!

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Awesome! And my team member is Naomi Wilkinson from Live'n'Deadly.

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-Yay! Are you ready?

-Yes!

-OK, let's do this.

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It's time for Jedward's tour of ancient Edinburgh,

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and it's all to play for as only one team can win,

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while the poor losers will receive a gardyloo soaking.

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First up it's John and Naomi

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with Edinburgh Castle's volcanic past.

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John has an explosive demonstration planned.

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It's going to explode?

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We'll put the secret ingredient in, and it's going to go, "Whoooosh!"

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And we're like, "Aaaargh!" I haven't tried this out yet.

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-Hopefully, everything goes right.

-What could possibly go wrong?!

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-I'm John!

-And Naomi!

-And together we are Jaomi!

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Welcome to Edinburgh Castle.

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Team Jaomi must make the tourists remember how many years ago

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the castle rock was actually a volcano.

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340 million years ago there was a volcano here.

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Molten lava everywhere.

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Today we're going to relive that moment.

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-Do you want to see the volcano?

-Yes!

-Yes, please.

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-I said, do you guys want to see the volcano?

-Yes!

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All right, let's do this.

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Three, two, one.

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Quick, run! Run for your life, John!

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Whoa! It's erupting!

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It's going to go crazy!

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Oh, dear.

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That was impressive.

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Was it, though? The tourists don't look that impressed.

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Let's hope the mighty volcano didn't distract them from the crucial date.

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Now it's over to Captain John Grimes

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and first mate Chris Rankin for the tale of the pirates.

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You must be our shipmates, which means you need to wear pirate gear.

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Mums too, come on.

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Their first story is to explain how many pirates were locked up

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-in Edinburgh Castle.

-Can you all do an "aaaarrrr!"?

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ALL: Aaaarrrrr!

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Pirates were kept here as prisoners.

0:18:330:18:35

There was a boat out there on the water called the Eagle.

0:18:350:18:39

-Like an eagle.

-They found pirates on there, with treasure.

0:18:390:18:43

-They brought them back to the castle and kept them prisoner.

-21 pirates.

0:18:430:18:47

-How many sailors were brought here, young lady?

-21!

0:18:470:18:52

# A sailor went to sea, sea, sea

0:18:520:18:55

# To see what he could see, see, see! #

0:18:550:18:58

Didn't they do well? Getting the tourists

0:18:580:19:00

to repeat the number of pirate prisoners was a good tactic.

0:19:000:19:03

Now it's over to team John and some rather fetching attire.

0:19:050:19:09

-You know what? We look...

-BOTH: ..amazing!

0:19:090:19:13

-You look amazing.

-You look amazing. And together we look amazing.

0:19:130:19:17

Let's do this.

0:19:170:19:19

Next is the story of the tartan. They must get across to the tourists

0:19:190:19:22

what a sporran is used for.

0:19:220:19:24

-I feel so much more free.

-Hi, guys. We are waiting tartan.

0:19:240:19:30

-We're now wearing girly skirts.

-They are not skirts, they're kilts.

0:19:300:19:35

Different weavers made different tartan

0:19:350:19:37

depending on what dyes they could get hold of, so they used things

0:19:370:19:41

that grew in Scotland to make different coloured dyes.

0:19:410:19:44

Can John name that dye?

0:19:440:19:47

-For example, gypsywort would make the colour...

-I don't know.

0:19:470:19:51

-Green! And seaweed would make the colour...

-Flesh!

-Flesh colour.

0:19:510:19:57

-And berries would make the colour...

-Red.

-Blue!

0:19:570:20:03

-Whelks! What colour did whelks make?

-Pink?

-Purple.

0:20:030:20:06

-John's confused.

-Do you remember all that?

-And so are the tourists.

0:20:060:20:11

Remember, they need to tell them about the sporran.

0:20:110:20:15

We have pleats at the back, I don't have any pockets.

0:20:150:20:19

Where would my phone, money and keys go? In a sporran.

0:20:190:20:23

-What is it?

-ALL: Sporran!

0:20:230:20:25

Job done.

0:20:250:20:27

It was a rocky start, but have team Jaomi pulled it out of the sporran?

0:20:270:20:31

The team that I think is doing best is John and Naomi.

0:20:310:20:35

Crazy.

0:20:350:20:37

-I think the winners will probably be Naomi and John.

-Jaomi!

0:20:380:20:42

So, halfway through, and the competition is heating up.

0:20:420:20:45

This time, Edward and Chris have to get across not one, not two,

0:20:470:20:52

but three symptoms of the bubonic plague.

0:20:520:20:54

-Brought to you in association with rats...

-I've got the plague!

0:20:540:20:58

-..one dying Edward...

-I've got the plague!

0:20:580:21:03

..and one beaky doctor.

0:21:030:21:06

-He's going to help.

-I'm a doctor.

0:21:060:21:08

Plague doctors wore these... beaky things.

0:21:080:21:13

Who wants to squeeze my bubo?

0:21:130:21:16

ALL: No!

0:21:160:21:17

Fine, I'll get the doctor to do it.

0:21:170:21:20

ALL: Eurgh!

0:21:210:21:24

Isn't that disgusting?

0:21:240:21:27

I've got these black spots on my stomach.

0:21:270:21:30

-And have you got a high fever?

-I'm so hot right now.

0:21:300:21:33

He's definitely got the plague.

0:21:330:21:37

That's the symptoms taken care of.

0:21:370:21:38

But could they follow what was going on?

0:21:380:21:41

We've got to read of this dead body.

0:21:410:21:43

What do you guys reckon? Come on, let's go.

0:21:430:21:47

The team I think is doing best is Edward and Chris.

0:21:470:21:50

I'd say Edward and Chris's team.

0:21:500:21:53

Edward and Chris's team.

0:21:530:21:56

Cos they're all dramatic and funny.

0:21:560:21:58

Doesn't Edinburgh have a tropical beach we could tell them about?

0:22:000:22:04

John and Naomi are in a graveyard,

0:22:040:22:07

and are going to extreme lengths for their final story.

0:22:070:22:11

They must get across to the tourists who the grave robbers

0:22:110:22:14

-would sell the bodies to.

-This is the best idea ever.

0:22:140:22:18

-No, it's a terrible idea.

-So Naomi is not convinced about John's plan.

0:22:180:22:22

But I'm sure he'll let her out, won't he? Won't he?!

0:22:220:22:25

Here we go.

0:22:250:22:27

Things I do for Jedward.

0:22:270:22:29

I'm here to explain what grave robbing was. Do you know what it is?

0:22:290:22:34

-Yes!

-You don't, I'm going to explain it.

0:22:340:22:36

OK, so the tourists have heard of grave robbers,

0:22:360:22:39

but have they heard the story about the bell?

0:22:390:22:42

Grave robbers would dig up the bodies,

0:22:430:22:45

bring them to medical schools, and sell them for £7.

0:22:450:22:47

-How much?

-£7!

0:22:470:22:49

The reason he'd dig the bodies up was the medical schools wanted

0:22:490:22:54

as much bodies as possible to experiment on.

0:22:540:22:57

Back then, it was scary because they didn't know much about the bodies,

0:22:570:23:00

and sometimes they buried people alive.

0:23:000:23:03

And if they woke up, "What am I doing here?!"

0:23:030:23:06

They'd see a string attached to them, they'd pull the string...

0:23:060:23:08

BELL RINGS

0:23:080:23:10

Guys, look!

0:23:100:23:11

-Naomi's ringing the bell! Shall we let her out?

-Yes!

0:23:110:23:14

-What if it's just the wind blowing?

-Oi, it's me!

-Let's let her out.

0:23:140:23:19

Let's do this.

0:23:190:23:21

CHEERING

0:23:210:23:22

-You're alive!

-Didn't you hear me ringing the bell?!

0:23:240:23:27

-Very memorable.

-Go, Jaomi!

0:23:290:23:32

But did all the coffin chaos get in the way of the facts?

0:23:320:23:37

It was good learning all about how they buried people alive,

0:23:370:23:41

and I liked the whole bell thing.

0:23:410:23:43

Now it's over to Edward and Chris for their final story,

0:23:440:23:48

and no expense has been spared on this one.

0:23:480:23:51

Come on, guys, we've got lots to learn.

0:23:510:23:54

They're explaining the story of how witches were found guilty.

0:23:540:23:58

Chris should have an advantage here. After all, he was in Harry Potter.

0:23:580:24:03

Anyone could be accused of being a witch. You could be a witch,

0:24:030:24:06

-you could be a witch.

-You're a witch.

-Then you'd be tortured.

0:24:060:24:09

Or you might be given trial by water.

0:24:090:24:13

Do you want to know how trial by water worked? ALL: Yes!

0:24:160:24:21

Basically, if you were innocent, you drowned because you weren't magic.

0:24:210:24:27

But if you were a witch, then obviously you could do magic,

0:24:270:24:31

and you would float to the surface.

0:24:310:24:34

Our witch isn't guilty, she just wanted to fly away.

0:24:340:24:38

Well explained by Chris,

0:24:380:24:40

but Edward's flying, which might have distracted them from the info.

0:24:400:24:43

We'll soon find out, as the tours are now over.

0:24:430:24:47

Both teams have put everything into their tours of Edinburgh.

0:24:470:24:52

But have the tourists learned those vital facts,

0:24:520:24:55

or were the flying witches and all that coffin nonsense

0:24:550:25:00

too much of a distraction? It's time to find out.

0:25:000:25:04

It's time for the Big Test.

0:25:040:25:05

How many pirates were locked up in Edinburgh Castle?

0:25:050:25:08

-They're being asked one question on each of the stories.

-21!

0:25:080:25:13

For each correct answer, there's a point in it

0:25:130:25:16

for the team who told that story.

0:25:160:25:19

How many years ago was the castle rock a volcano?

0:25:190:25:23

And the team with the most points will win.

0:25:230:25:26

-I think it was 4-2 something.

-What were sporrans used for?

0:25:260:25:31

To put your belongings in.

0:25:360:25:39

So, it's the moment of truth. The scores are in.

0:25:420:25:45

Who will win and who will face a bucket of fake pee and poo,

0:25:450:25:50

called the gardyloo?!

0:25:500:25:53

There it is. Ugh!

0:25:540:25:56

I don't want to get gunged.

0:25:580:26:00

The results of Jedward's big adventure in Edinburgh are...

0:26:000:26:05

With 24 points...

0:26:060:26:08

-It's John and Naomi.

-No!

0:26:110:26:15

-Is that good or bad?

-I think it's quite bad.

0:26:150:26:20

While Edward and Chris have scored a total of...

0:26:200:26:25

..28 points!

0:26:300:26:32

-It'll be OK!

-It's victory for Edward!

0:26:350:26:39

So far in the series, both boys have won two shows each.

0:26:410:26:45

The winner gets to perform the Edinburgh ritual of gardyloo

0:26:450:26:51

on the loser!

0:26:510:26:53

I don't want to be gardyloo'd.

0:26:530:26:54

I don't want poo and pee all that stuff. And they go, "Gardyloo!"

0:26:540:26:58

I don't want to be all smelly.

0:26:580:27:01

Oh, dear. Did we forget to tell team John

0:27:010:27:04

that the buckets of gardyloo were not real?

0:27:040:27:07

It's just gravy and pop mixed together. Oh, well, too late now.

0:27:070:27:12

Brace yourselves - this is going to be messy.

0:27:120:27:15

You're going to get it!

0:27:170:27:18

No, no! EDWARD: You're going to get it!

0:27:180:27:22

THEY SQUEAL

0:27:220:27:24

Gardyloo!

0:27:240:27:25

-It stinks.

-Is my hair ruined?

-Gardyloo!

0:27:320:27:37

It's disgusting! What is it?!

0:27:440:27:48

-It looks like someone got sick on you.

-I think it's worse than sick.

0:27:480:27:52

# Jedward's big adventure! #

0:27:520:27:54

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