Full Throttle League of Super Evil


Full Throttle

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Eat my dust!

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Deploy the speed boosters, Red Menace.

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Ha-ah! Victory! In your face, slow pokes!

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Whoa! Ah!

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HE LAUGHS EVILLY

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At long last, a sinister machine worthy enough to call our own!

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Now, that's what I call an upgrade!

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-Wow!

-I'm just glad to have it back on the road.

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You have no idea how dangerous it is riding the city bus...

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It's time to unleash this evil ride on the neighbours.

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Men, I propose we back the V-Mobile into the driveway,

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turn up the radio to full blast,

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and set off all the neighbours' car alarms!

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HE LAUGHS EVILLY

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Maybe after, can we take it out and race someone?

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Fuzzy dice and flame decals make anything go faster!

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Yeah, whatever, Red...

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Wait a minute, forget the car alarms.

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I've got an even better idea!

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Let's take it out and race someone!

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Whoo-hoo!

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I'll get my helmet and knee-pads.

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Can we race her?

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Too slow, too grey, too wrinkly.

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Or her?

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Too young, too sweet, too freckly.

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-Ooh!

-Too slimy, too legless, too...dirty.

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If you'd stop being so picky, we'd be racing already.

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There's gotta be someone in this town worthy enough

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to race against the V-Mobile extreme!

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Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! What about that guy?

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Flame decals...

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Must be fast.

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Can I help you?

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Yes. You can help me... by eating my dust!

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HE LAUGHS EVILLY

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Um, maybe you didn't hear me? I said, EAT MY DUST!

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Eh, what's the matter?! Why won't you race me?!

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Do you know who I am?

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I think I have an idea.

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I am Doom Driver!

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For centuries, I have rid the streets of renegade racers,

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by challenging them with my dreaded Doom Mobile.

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Winner gets the loser's ride.

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And I never lose.

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HE YAWNS LOUDLY

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That's because you've never raced against the V-Mobile Extreme!

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Now, Voltar, please don't upset the very menacing, un-dead racer.

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Race? You? Ha! Perhaps some other time.

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But don't you want to rid the streets of our dangerous racing nightmare?

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Look, I'm gonna level with you.

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I have loads of chores to do for Mrs Driver today...

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I can't waste my time racing against a bunch of...

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whatever you are...

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in a golf cart, OK?

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GOLF CART?! Mark my words, Doom Driver,

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by this days end, you will race the League Of Super Evil!

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Hum-ha-la-hum-hum-hum...

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Wha...?!

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Race me!

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I'd like to make a deposit, please.

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And I'd like you to...RACE ME!

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Whoa!

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Grr...

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I'm just grabbing a bite, sweetie.

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See you in a bit...

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No, I love you more! Ha-ha-ha!

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I do, mwah!

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Race me!

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Oh!

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Aargh!

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Eh... Hey!

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Grr!

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Fine! We'll race.

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Anything to get you to stop bothering me.

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Thank you!

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Come, Red Menace, our work is done.

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Try the creme brulee, it's divine!

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The rules of this race of the doomed are simple -

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first one around the block and back is the victor,

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and if I win, I claim your ride.

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Well, I guess that means I get yours when I win.

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Yeah. Sure... Whatever.

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The race is over. I am victorious, your loss will cost you dearly,

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-yada, yada, yada...

-We lost?!

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We're gonna lose the V-Mobile?!

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You mean your golf cart?

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You can keep it.

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You know, like I'd want that slow piece of junk.

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Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

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We get to keep the V-Mobile!

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And I don't have to ride the bus!

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Voltar...?

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CURSE THAT DOOM DRIVER!

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What's wrong with the V-Mobile Extreme? Hmm?!

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Not COOL enough for Doom Driver to take from us?!

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Oh, oh we'll show him. I want a re-match!

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But this time we'll make the V-Mobile so cool that when we lose,

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he'll have to take it from us!

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Yeah, but... But, Voltar...

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I want you to turn it into the coolest,

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most awesomest losing vehicle the world has ever seen!

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The V-Mobile Super-Duper Extreme!

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ENGINE ROARS

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Whoa.

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Turbojet engines,

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scoop and close double pumper carburettor,

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grass skirt luau girl on the dashboard!

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What's the matter, Doom Driver?

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Never seen a sweet-looking ride before?

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Ahem... I'm gonna have to race you for it.

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Oh, you're on, Doom Driver.

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And may the best ride lose.

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The rules of this race of the doomed are simple...

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Hey! I wasn't done my pre-race speech!

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Look at her go!

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We're doing great. We're gonna win!

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WHAT?! No...

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We can't win... Aargh!

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Yes - Yes we can!

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We need to start losing, and fast!

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Good boy, Doomageddon!

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Let's wreck this ride.

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Don't make me ride the bus.

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I wanna win!

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Oh!

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He's catching up, Voltar.

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Keep it up, guys, we're slowing down!

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Please win, please win!

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Sorry, Frogg, not today.

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Yes! The race is over.

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I, Doom Driver, am victorious.

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-Your loss will cost you dearly, and that...

-Lost!

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We lost! Whoo-hoo!

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Yeah!

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-What?!

-In your face, Doom Driver!

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Ooh. Hurrah.

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Then I guess I'll be taking what's mine.

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The rest, you can keep.

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Oh, that's right, Doom Driver - you know you won our cool upgrade!

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Ha-HA!

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Gentlemen, we lost. We were crushed, defeated. I CLAIM VICTORY!

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HE LAUGHS EVILLY

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And best of all, I won't have to ride the public bus!

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Ha-ha-ha... Eek!

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Ha-ha... Nice, Doomy...

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No!

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Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

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E-mail [email protected]

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