Bubble Trouble Lockie Leonard

# ..They were burning themselves out in the sun

# Worlds away from anyone

# They were burning themselves out in the sun

# There was just enough to get that far away... #

'They look so innocent, floating about all round and shimmery.

'Hanging out at kids' parties. Landing on your nose.

'But there's a dangerous side to bubbles too.

'Bubbles can get you into some serious trouble.'

What are the charges?

"Joy Leonard.

"Embezzling.

"Barbara Leonard. Resist arrest. Assault police."

What about these two?

Impersonation racket.

'Then there was the business with the bubble.

'I better fill you in on a few of the gaps.

'Vicki and I were blissed out in our own little world where no-one else

'existed except us.'

You hang up.

No. You hang up.

'It was like we were living in a bubble.

'Our very own private bubble of happiness.'

No, you hang up.

No, you hang up.

No, you hang up.

-HE LAUGHS

-You win.

'But Vicki and I were so caught up in ourselves

'we had no idea that people around us were finding us hard to stomach.

'But that's the trouble with bubbles -

'you can't see what's going on on the outside,

'or how your behaviour is affecting other people in the real world.'

RETCHING

'Even Sarge, whose job description as my dad,

'says he's supposed to be completely obsessed with my happiness.

'Well, even he was struggling with our bubble-related behaviour.'

SARGE RETCHES

Pardon me.

Are you feeling OK, Sarge?

Oh, well, sick is probably too strong a word.

-It's more a...

-Bilious?

-Yeah.

'Meanwhile, Mum was also trapped in a bubble.'

-Snacks, Sarge. After-school snacks.

-Expecting company, are we?

'Mum's bubble was her own little world of worry.

'After two weeks at Angelus High and not one play date,

'Mum was worried Phillip was never going to have any friends.'

If I cook it, they will come.

'You could say that Mum was still a bit scarred

'by her own school experience.'

You should be outside playing with the other children.

It's such a lovely day.

'But as much as she wanted them,

'Mum didn't have any friends to play with.'

-It's OK.

-'And she didn't want things to be the same for Phillip.'

-More tea?

-No, thanks.

'The next day,

'Sarge and Snowy prepared to welcome a new friend.'

Got a good feeling about this new officer, Snowy.

A bit of feminine energy is just what we need to balance things up.

-She cooks a dense cake does Joy.

-She does indeed.

Now, flower on the side of the plate - nice touch or too much?

Not sure, Sarge. They're from out the front.

People walk their dogs past there.

Right, OK, we'll leave that then. HE CLEARS THROAT

Let's have a quick run through.

Right.

"Welcome her, thunders of fort and of fleet

"Welcome her, thundering cheer of the street

"Welcome her, all things youthful and sweet

"Scatter the blossom under her feet

"Break, happy land into earlier flowers

"Make music, O bird in the new budded bowers

"Blazing your mottos of blessing and prayer

"Welcome her, welcome her all that is ours!"

No, Snowy, you have to come in on the...

Constable Waddle?

Depends who's asking.

I'm Snowy.

He's Sarge.

-And we've got a cake.

-Course you do.

Teacake so hard I'm going to break my teeth.

Poems so bad I'm going to throw up.

Ha.

I didn't come down in the last shower, fellas.

I've been the new girl before.

I can spot a prank a mile off.

It's a shame you've been in the city, Constable.

You have been trained to expect the worst.

Granted, that cake IS firm,

but it was baked with love.

And this verse, if listened to without fear of trickery,

is a herald of genuine goodwill.

Are you for real?

100%.

Over at the Egglestons',

Reverend Egg was struggling to make sense of things, too.

Since Egg's mum left, it kind of burst their family bubble.

And Rev was at a bit of a loose end.

Well.

At least he's still got his relationship with God.

Maybe the Rev needs a friend. Then he wouldn't be sad.

-And then YOU wouldn't be sad.

-Maybe even a friend that's a girl.

Where will I find someone that wants to be his friend?

-You wouldn't have to.

-I wouldn't?

-Leave it to Lockie and I.

-Really?

-Really?

-Absolutely.

We'd love to help out.

-What's in it for you?

-What's in it for us?

We just... We just want to see you happy.

'And, in a weird way, it was completely true.

'We wanted him to be happy,

'so WE could be happy without feeling guilty

-'for being in our bubble.'

-Leave it to us, Egg.

That's the price of happiness, Lockie.

Now we've brought the best out in each other, we have to look out

for those less fortunate than us.

-You are a remarkable person, Vicki Streeton.

-You are.

-You are.

-No, you are!

-No, you are!

So, Constable Waddle,

I'm sure Angelus isn't the last step on your career path.

What were you hoping to achieve while you were here?

Er...lots of arrests.

No, come on, really. I'm interested.

I'm really interested in arresting people.

Really?

Zero tolerance, apprehend first, ask questions later.

One strike and you're out.

One strike?

Well, I'm afraid we don't get too many strikes here in Angelus.

Doesn't sound like you look for any.

Well, Constable Waddle,

we tend to operate on the idea that

it's hard to read a good poem and commit a crime at the same time.

I think you'll find we run a pretty tight ship here.

You're welcome to prove me wrong. Unless you're not up for it.

Don't worry.

I'm up for it.

'Sam was determined to prove there was crime in Angelus.

'And burst Sarge's bubble in the process.

'While Mum, she was trying to convince Blob

'it was their duty to help Phillip make new friends.'

We don't want to miss play-lunch, do we?

Just a little smile and a wave as we pass

might be all the encouragement he needs. BELL RINGS

Can you see Phillip anywhere, Blob?

Oh.

You don't need to see this, Blob.

-Mum, what are you doing here?

-Stay out of this, Phillip.

Play-lunch is a very small window of opportunity, Mr Squatter.

How do you expect Phillip to make friends when you keep him in here?

Is it because he's a Leonard? Not enough to punish one of my sons,

now you have to make both of them pay.

-Er, Mum, I was just...

-It's all right, Phillip.

Adults can be bullies, too.

And sooner or later, someone just has to stand up to them.

We're in a teacher/student science competition.

Phillip is here by choice, Mrs Leonard.

But...

Why aren't you outside playing with all the others?

It's a beautiful day out there.

I'm happy.

'Suddenly, Phillip reminded Mum of someone she used to know.'

-More tea?

-No, thank you.

-No, thank you.

Oh.

Of course you would say that.

Why are you here, anyway?

Did I forget my lunchbox again?

Tuck shop.

I heard they were short staffed this term.

-Are you sure that's a good idea?

-Mrs Ramsgate runs a pretty tight ship.

SHE CLEARS THROAT

Something I can help you with?

I'm waiting.

'Mum should have run a mile.

'But she was determined to help Phillip find friends.'

Well, I would like to apply to, you know...volunteer?

I see.

-Joy Leonard.

-This isn't just any old tuck shop.

I run a very tight ship.

The recess bell waits for no-one.

Oh, I have a lot of experience making sandwiches and I'm very fast.

-It takes more than fast, Mrs Leonard.

-I'm inventive, too,

with my fillings. Tuna and honey, tomato and jam...

So, you're creative. That's very well and good.

But let's cut to the chase. How fast can you make a cheese sandwich?

-Three in under a minute. With pickles.

-Plastic wrapped?

-And bagged.

Impressive.

See Nerelle over there for your plastic glove. Don't take it home.

It belongs to the tuck shop.

'Mum wasn't the only one with tunnel vision that day.'

Just throw more at me. Freefall.

-Fun, active, intelligent.

-You can't be serious.

-Good, good. Keep them coming.

-You're putting an ad in the paper?

-Yeah.

-I don't think this is a good idea.

-Bubbly, spontaneous.

-Deaf?

-I didn't know the Rev was deaf.

-He's not, you're not listening to me.

-I'm not sure this is a good idea.

-You're not the best judge of that.

He's my dad!

Exactly. Now where were we up to?

Er... "Sensitive, recently separated, seeks female companion...

"for spontaneous fun. Interest in God, an advantage."

Gold.

Gold.

One salad in a bowl.

-Thanks.

-And...

..one vanilla slice, courtesy of Phillip Leonard.

-First year?

-Sure.

You in first year?

You can thank Phillip Leonard.

First year? I don't think so. Next window.

Hello, Mum.

Hello.

Hm. You know, I don't think they've changed this recipe in 17 years.

Oh. Can I have one? Even though I'm not in first year?

'Or a candidate in Phillip's new game of Buddies.'

You know, I think this is the last one.

Will someone tell me where they've put all the vanilla slices?

Thank you.

Hello, Sarge. Did you have a good day?

Did...Constable Waddle really like my teacake?

Hard to say. She didn't appreciate my poem as much as I'd hoped.

Well, did you pick a good one?

-Alfred Lord Tennyson.

-Ah.

She's just a strange fish but, you know, we'll get there.

Think I'll have a soak and THEN get into my pyjamas, Mum.

-What?! Already?

-Big day tomorrow. Bonus questions on the quiz.

Want to make sure I'm all rested.

Save some for the others!

-What others?

-They might still come.

'But Phillip wasn't actually in a hurry for a new friend.

'And Rev wasn't, either.'

Hi, Dad.

What are you doing?

Oh, nothing much. Just...

Just writing to Mum?

You going to send it this time?

I'm not sure.

Maybe you need someone new to write to, Dad.

'What can I say?

'The ad Vicki and I put in the paper, asking people to audition

'to be Rev's new friend, got a big response.

'Maybe too big.'

Hi. Come on in.

Thanks very much for coming.

MUSIC: "Come On Come On" by Little Birdy

There's no way you say Liz isn't the hands-down winner.

Why are you so impressed by Liz? She's got nothing on Sue.

Liz has been hiking in Peru. She rides a Harley.

-She surfs, Vicki.

-The ideal woman, right?

Er, guys?

-You are SUCH a Neanderthal sometimes.

-Am not!

-Are too!

-Am not! Look! Liz is clearly our only choice.

-Sue is just wrong!

-They're both wrong.

There's no room for them. Either of them.

-But they're both so slim.

-Yeah, they won't take up much room.

You're not listening. There's no space. At all.

I miss my mum. All right?

'And that's when it happened.

'That's when Vicki and I

'finally realised the cost of living in a bubble.

'You get so caught up in your own stuff,

'you stop looking out for others and stop seeing what they really need.

'Which for Egg, right now, was a friend.'

We're sorry, Egg.

Never been so humiliated in all my life!

Why did I go do that audition? Why? I need a vanilla slice!

Er, Miss Ramsgate...

I have a...a little confession.

"Recently separated. Interest in God an advantage."

Something fish about this ad.

PHONE RINGS

Angelus police.

I see.

Don't let the suspect get away!

Snowy, we've got a case on our hands.

This her?

(No. No.)

WADDLE CLEARS THROAT

You're coming with me.

What do we have here?

An accomplice?

Vanilla slice.

You're coming, too.

BREATHILY: Sa... Sa... Sa...

Has anybody got a paper bag?

I know how you feel. Today's been a shocker.

-Between this and the audition...

-Audition?

Oi!

-You guys put an ad in the paper?

-Yeah, but you're late, I'm afraid.

You look a little young to be recently separated.

The ad was for someone else... who isn't here.

And doesn't even know WE'RE here.

I smell fraud.

Snowy!

Can't believe he didn't tell me who they were!

Give me a go!

I was in shock!

Couldn't...speak!

KNOCK ON DOOR

Hi, Snowy!

-Mum!

-Good. You've come to bust me out!

What happened?!

Well...I took a lot of vanilla slices and I forgot to pay for them.

Was Miss Ramsgate very angry?

I should have listened to you and Mr Squashy.

Is it really OK, Phillip?

That you don't have many friends, apart from old Squasher?

No, but you don't have many friends and you're still happy.

'And that, hearing the plain and simply truth,

'Mum was reminded that Phillip didn't really need anything.

'Like her, her had everything he wanted.

'And it was enough to finally burst Mum's worry bubble.'

Do you know why that is? Why I am...so happy?

Cos you got us?

You are a remarkable young man, Phillip Leonard.

Thanks, Mum.

Mm.

Er...Mum...you're squashing my face.

MUSIC PLAYS THROUGH HEADPHONES

I saw the ad.

Not that I'm ready... for a new friend.

But you've got some nice ones.

They weren't really doing it for me, Geoffrey.

They were doing it for you.

Hand me those keys. We've no other choice, we have to let them go!

Ahh.

Well, well, well.

What do we have here, then?

I have to say, Constable, these are very serious charges.

But what impresses me most is...

you've glimpsed the atrocities just beneath.

They're very subtle crimes. It would have been easy to miss.

Meddling of the highest order.

-Multiple counts of CSA.

-CSA?

-Criminal self-absorption.

You've come a long way this week.

Commendable work.

Welcome to Angelus.

'Constable Waddle realised Sarge didn't live in a bubble, after all.

'He just lived in Angelus.

'And as for the rest of us?

'Sarge wasn't about to let us off the hook.'

The Rock And The Bubble by Louisa May Alcott.

'Sarge kept us back late, reciting a long, illustrative poem,

'pointing out the vain, one-sided dangers of bubbles.

Heed, little birdlings

And wiser you'll be

For the lesson learned

Today by the sea.

You're free to go.

'Sarge's poem was spot on. Vicki and I had learned our lesson

'and were ready to give up on bubbles.

'For good.'

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

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