Time and Tide Lockie Leonard

# Worlds away from anyone

# They were burning themselves out in the sun

# Worlds away from anyone

# They were burning themselves out in the sun

# There was just enough

# To get that far away

# Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh

# Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh

# Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. #

OK, so get this. Tide drifts in, tide drifts out.

Tide drifts in, tide drifts out.

It happens every day.

And it will keep on happening,

every day, for the rest of your life.

So, why am I noticing this just now?

Because I figured people do it, too.

One minute they are in your life,

the next minute, they're not.

Take Vicki, for example.

'Ever since she moved to the city, Vicki had been sending messages.

'Sometimes too many.

'But now?

'No messages?'

Relationship status - unknown. But I thought we were...

'Then it hit me.

'Vicki wasn't just drifting away,

'she was paddling in the opposite direction.'

'I can't help it. I just love rowing my own boat, Lockie.'

"If Kylie has two pairs of jeans

"and Vanessa takes one of those pairs of jeans away,

"how many pairs of jeans should Kylie have left?"

When they say "jeans", I presume we're talking about denim?

I know. Parents doing homework together.

Weird.

But I can explain.

First, Egg was busted handing in other people's work.

Strike one.

Next, he locked Ms Archer in the music room.

Strike two.

Then, Egg confessed to violating Ms Archer's flute...

I did it.

..even though he didn't really do it.

So, now Egg was on his way to enrichment class.

It was where all the kids who notched up three strikes went.

Lockie, if I go to enrichment class, I may never see you again.

One more word, Leonard, you'll be joining him.

There's your new home, Eggleston.

See you in a few years.

Heh-heh.

Off you go.

WOLF HOWLS

He's right, you know.

Once you go to enrichment class, you don't come back.

RAISED VOICE FROM WITHIN

ALL: I'm excited to be here.

That's very good... Ah-ha!

You must be...Geoffrey?

I'm Neil.

-Mr Neil.

-Just Neil.

We're all equals in here.

Would you care to join our Circle of Trust?

We like to think of this space

as a feasting place for the morally malnourished.

So, class, let's tell each other

why we are excited to have Geoffrey amongst us. And teach!

ALL: We're really excited to have Geoffrey in class

because we might learn something from him

and he might learn something from us.

So, Geoffrey...

What can we learn from you?

What can you teach us?

I don't know.

Um...

I'm pretty good at playing guitar.

Well, we have music therapy three times a week.

We look forward to you sharing your knowledge with us.

Sweet.

DOOR BANGS

Hello, you pack of freaks.

I'm back.

Curtis Ferraros, the meanest,

baddest bogun in Angelus High.

I believe you're in my beanbag.

Wherever he went, he made news...

The bad kind.

Aahh.

Back so soon?

You were only released into the general population last week.

Three days it took me to get back.

Must be losing my touch.

I'd heard they were sending in fresh meat.

You'd better watch out, man,

because Curtis has officially declared it barbecue season.

Phillip.

Phillip!

By my calculation, the comet we have been tracking

should appear in the night sky over Angelus tomorrow.

Tomorrow night?!

At approximately 8.17pm.

But...

if we see it first, we can name it.

-Oh!

-I think it should be called...

-..Pam!

-Pam?

Phillip and Marjorie.

If we name it, we will be remembered forever.

Pam.

Pam. Whacko!

You come over and we'll check the figures.

-I'll make some chocolate crackles.

-Oh! OK.

Sarge was worried someone was drifting from him, too.

Constable Wattle.

What do you know about this?

Arrested him this morning.

What charge?

Disturbing the peace.

I don't want to go down the path of arresting livestock for that.

-You arrested Cyril once.

-That was an exception.

He was a criminal mastermind, who needed love and care

and, ultimately, a place to live.

It was crowing above 98 decibels, Sarge.

Surely the rooster is but the sentinel for the new day?

At 98 decibels?

This "sentinel" is a criminal.

ROOSTER SQUAWKS

If Kylie has two pairs of jeans and Vanessa takes one of those away,

how many pairs of jeans should Kylie have left?

Carron.

Eh...shorts?

I can see where you were going with that.

Stay open to positivity

and wisdom will come.

Curtis, how about you?

How many pairs of jeans should Kylie have left?

Well...

if you have two pairs of jeans and you take one away,

then you're left with one pair of jeans.

One.

Got our work cut out for us, don't we, hmm?

It must be a trick question.

-Sorry?

-It has to be a trick question, right?

If the answer isn't "one",

it has to be. The key must be in the wording.

"How many pairs should Kylie have left?" See?

It's not "does have", but "should have", so the answer is two.

Vanessa shouldn't have taken Kylie's jeans,

because stealing is wrong.

CURTIS GUFFAWS

Yes. Correct.

One gold star.

Another four more of those

and you are formally enriched

and free to return to your old classmates. Well done.

Now we have a full appreciation

for my superior interpretation

of Shakespeare's so-called masterpiece,

it's time to bring the words to life.

Break off into pairs.

OK, pairs.

'Easy. But suddenly, without Egg around, I was short on options.'

Sorry. Taken.

There you are.

My Romeo!

As long as Verona still stands,

you will be mine, mine, mine.

'Total and utter humiliation.

'I was looking forward to getting something to eat.'

"Dear Lockie, with my increased homework commitments,

"I didn't have time to make your lunch today.

"Perhaps you could share lunch with a friend?

"Love, Mum."

What are they doing here? They're not allowed in the quadrangle.

-Then he farted. It was so stinky.

-Hey!

-Lockie!

You know you're not meant to mix with the general population!

It's lunchtime.

They know the rules.

They've broken almost all of them. Get!

Go on! Shoo!

See you, Lockie.

'No Vicki, no Egg.

'Even Sasha has rejected me.

'Yep, my transformation was almost complete.

'I was becoming Lonely Guy Lockie.'

BIRD CAWS

'Sarge said sometimes that you need to be alone

'for things to make sense,

'but the only thing that made sense right now,

'I needed to make a new friend.

'Fast.'

Lockie! I'll be your friend! Forever!

'It was time to do something desperate.

'It was time to join a club.'

I've always loved badminton, especially the shape of the ball.

DISCORDANT FUZZ

I just saw the word "rock".

Just go.

'Then, I tried Insect Club.'

Get it off! Get it off!

Out!

I wasn't the only one feeling lonely.

KNOCKING

Good evening, Geoffrey.

Is your father home?

No, he's with Mrs Leonard.

-Mrs Leonard?

-Yeah, they've set up a homework club,

to try and, you know,

help me get out of...

Are you expecting him home soon?

He won't be back till late.

-Midnight, perhaps?

-Will you let him know I popped round?

Of course.

Leonie!

I'm so sorry I'm late. Have you been waiting long?

Just got here. Egg and I have had a lovely chat.

Have you partaken in God's bounty?

No.

You enjoy it, it's all yours.

I'm taking Leonie to Mexican Joe's Jamboree.

You're more than welcome to join us.

-No, better stay in and go over Dad's study notes.

-That's my boy.

We think we've really cracked the jeans question.

Shorts?

Ha-ha! Shall we?

Egg, too, felt like someone was drifting out of his life.

MEXICAN MUSIC

Adios, amigo! Yee-hee!

Look at all those stars.

There are so many out there

and they are so beautiful and so...

Speaking scientifically, very.

I can't wait to go back up there.

Sorry?

My time in Angelus is almost finished.

It's about time I went back up to the stars.

Are you applying for the astronaut programme?

Speaking scientifically, the odds...

I am not speaking scientifically.

I'm talking about myself.

I'm an old woman

and I'm on bonus time, as it is.

But if we find that comet,

I will leave here the happiest old woman.

Leaving? Already?

-But we only just met.

-We've only just met,

but I've been here a very long time.

Have you ever been in a running race?

You've only just left the starting blocks, but me?

I'm nearly at the finish line.

Where did you come in your race?

Near the back.

Do you remember what it was like to cross the finish line?

Well, it's OK.

And I'm going to be OK, too.

Can you double-check my calculations?

A new day. Another tide.

ALARM BELL

'Surely things were going to get better.'

-Egg!

-Lockie!

Hey! Do you want to meet up at lunch?

Yeah, but you know I'm not allowed in the quadrangle.

-What about the old science lab? It's always empty.

-See you there!

Good morning, Curtis.

Look, gold star boy,

you don't talk to outsiders. You're one of us now

and you're either with us or against us. Got it?

-Got it.

-Good.

Now you can prove it.

-How?

-You're the brainiac, I'm sure you can figure out a way.

So, let's tell each other why chewing gum in class is a bad idea.

And teach!

ALL: Chewing gum in class is a bad idea.

Chewing gum in class is a bad idea.

Sergeant Leonard. Constable Wattle.

Let's invite our special guests into our Classroom of Trust.

Carron.

Welcome, coppers.

Thank you, Carron(!)

Good to see all of you.

Today, apart from shared stories,

we will also be writing a group poem

about things that give us the pips.

Young Geoffrey, maybe you'd like to start?

What gives you the pips?

Egg would never usually speak against Sarge,

but if he didn't make friends with Curtis,

life would become more difficult, more lonely that it already was.

The sergeant asked you a question.

Coppers.

Coppers give me the pips.

Let's move on to story time.

Carron, maybe you have a story you would like to share?

A little wombat went to the shops

and couldn't find his mum.

He went to the greyhound races

and his mum wasn't there either.

He was getting very tired, but still he kept looking.

He climbed to the top of Mount Angelus

and screamed at the top of his voice,

"Where are you, Mum?"

But all he could hear was the wind in the trees.

The end.

Thank you, Carron.

I'm...sure the little wombat's mum will come home very soon.

I...

..found this.

I think it belongs to Miss Gurgelly.

I'm sure Mrs Gurgelly will appreciate it.

Thank you, Carron.

SCHOOL BELL RINGS

OK, that's lunch.

Know what gives me the pips?

You.

Nice work today, Eggleston.

Curtis was impressed.

Want to hang out at lunch?

Us? Hang out?

-Today?

-Yeah.

See, I'd love to,

but I've already made plans to...

Curtis doesn't care if you have plans.

And he won't ask you twice.

Sure. Sure.

I could...reschedule.

'I know what you're thinking,

'but it's not like I waited all lunchtime for Egg.'

SCHOOL BELL RINGS

'OK, maybe I did.'

Meanwhile, it seemed Sam had finally drifted towards

Sarge's way of thinking.

Do you think it's possible, hypothetically,

that somewhere out there, there is a little rooster screaming out

from the top of Mount Angelus,

"Where are you, Dad?"

ROOSTER SQUAWKS

It's possible.

I know we still haven't taken his clawprints...

..but I think we should set him free.

ROOSTER SQUAWKS

If that's OK with you?

Permission granted, Constable.

I may still have to give his owner a fine.

A small one, but a fine, nevertheless.

ROOSTER SQUAWKS

If you have two oranges and, while you're sleeping,

I take away one orange, how many oranges will you be dreaming about?

-Dad...

-No, wait.

Oranges. Oranges. Hmm.

Citrus.

-It... It's coming to me.

-No.

Really, Dad...

Egg wanted tell his dad he was worried Rev was drifting from him

and he didn't belong in enrichment class.

But he couldn't find the words.

Knock, knock!

-Hey!

-Hola!

Ha-ha!

Hola, Geoffrey.

Are you ready?

Arriba!

Oh!

Look, I know we were meant to go to The Face Of The Bandidos tonight,

-but homework club's not going too well and...

-Of course.

We can go another time.

Vaya con dios, amigos.

And God go with you, too, Leonie.

Then Egg realised he didn't need to tell his dad anything.

There was another way to stop Rev from drifting from him.

Now, you were saying?

I was just going to say how good it is

that you and Mrs L are helping me with my homework.

But I still think I need a lot more help.

Like, every night.

Well, don't worry, Geoffrey.

We have all the time in the world.

Just you and me.

Now, oranges...

So what's the verdict?

Is our comet arriving tonight or not?

Hard to say.

It's either on its way or it's not.

Ah.

Leonard Minor. What are you working on?

Rechecking some astronomical calculations

pertaining to the location of a potential comet.

Very elegant.

You've carried the two here, see?

Which means x equals 817.

Tonight.

The comet comes tonight.

It's a common mistake, Marjorie.

You carried the two when you shouldn't have.

You're saying that our comet is not due to arrive

-for another 72 years?

-Give or take.

It involves fractuals, quantum theory and the multiverse.

It's very complicated...

..but it's safe to say it's still a while off yet.

Phillip, you're sweating.

Am I?

Look at that.

-So I am.

-Are you OK?

-Fine. Perfect.

I'm just...

-..hot.

-Hot?

You know, from being in the race, you know?

From the race we're both still in.

You're still in the race, right?

You're not quite finished yet?

-I think I'll get some red cordial.

-Yes.

Red cordial would be excellent.

Oh.

Phillip didn't like keeping such a big secret from Marjorie,

but if it kept her from drifting away a little longer,

he figured it was worth it.

'I just checked my inbox four times and wasn't going to check it again,

'because that would be desperate.

'And I wasn't desperate.

'There it was - 127 e-mails,

all from Vicki.

'So, anyway, Lockie,

'we went shoe shopping and then we went to the market.'

MULTIPLE VICKI VOICES OVERLAP

..12 different flavours.

..I just found out that the school...

'Vicki drifted back to me.

'It was more like a tsunami than a tide.

'And as for Egg?

'It seemed like he was drifting off in a whole new direction.

'Somewhere without me.'

People drift in and out of your life.

'Sometimes they come back to you,

'sometimes not.

'You never really know for sure.

'But what I did know?

'Right now, I was alone...

'..and it was OK.'

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