Tim Brown's SKUL Days M.I. High

SKUL agent sited. We need a plan.

Agreed. Oscar, you take the south. Carrie, we'll run the perimeters.

I've got a better idea. You two can wait there, I'm going over the top.

Oscar, no.

'Oscar!'

Thought I'd drop in and say hi.

Oscar, we had a plan.

We're meant to work as a team, remember.

You've been spying on MI9, why?

Fine, have it your way. Now move.

Wait.

Nice try.

The SKUL Academy.

-What's that?

-What do you think?

It's where they train kids to be SKUL agents.

The 21st Century faces a new kind of threat.

Old school spies have had their day and MI9 must create a new breed

of skilled undercover agent.

Hidden a place no villain will think to look.

Welcome to MI High.

-CRASHING MUSIC

-Ah! What is that?

That sounds like someone has got a bag of spanners and a drum kit

and thrown the whole lot down the stairs.

I'd say that was a tad harsh.

Besides, I need to practice for tonight.

Why? Who are you torturing?

It's my accordion recital, remember,

a whole evening of Boldovian folk music.

A whole evening?

Yes. And I hope everyone's bringing their families along too.

-So are your foster parents coming?

-They're cool but they're not, um...

Anyway, I think they're busy.

BUZZING

Wait, wait, this next one's a funeral march in A Minor.

It's my big finish.

Argh, it's horrible. Stop. Stop!

You've always got to go it alone, haven't you?

-I caught the SKUL agent, didn't I?

-I? There's no I in MI...

The point is MI9 is based on teamwork, communication

-and not playing the big I am.

-A thank you would have been nice.

The Grand Master's training school kids to be SKUL agents.

-It must be stopped.

-We plan to send one of you in to join the academy.

That sounds like a job for the great Osc-mundo.

We're sending Agent Gupta on this occasion.

What? But Oscar is so much better undercover than I am.

Don't worry, it's his way of punishing me

and he's worried I'll turn bad like my mum.

-Look, nobody said that.

-You didn't have to.

-Just because Mum betrayed everyone...

-Oscar is the logical choice.

-I'm right behind him.

-Me too.

Right.

Agent Cole, your mission is to infiltrate the SKUL Academy.

Once there find out what you can about Operation Z12.

-What's operation Z12?

-Z12 appears in Agent Suki's data card.

We think SKUL are using the academy to plan something big.

Carrie, we want you to interrogate Agent Suki.

MI9 are delivering a mobile interrogation unit to St Hope's.

Hopefully she'll tell Carrie what Operation Z12 is.

You mean in case I fail?

IRISH ACCENT: My name's Tim Brown. I'm a thief, safe cracker,

and I want to rob the biggest banks in the world.

Perfect. Except for these -

-eyebrow cameras.

-They're cutting edge technology, fitted with cameras

-and a microphone so you give hourly updates.

-What?

I'll be undercover. Do you have any idea how dangerous that is?

Not as dangerous as sending in someone with your family history.

Take these gob stoppers.

They release a gas that slows the body down to a snails pace.

-So, you have everything you need.

-Everything apart from MI9's trust.

The file showed us how to contact SKUL. We sent them Tim Brown's CV.

They were impressed.

You'll be picked up by two SKUL henchmen,

they'll scan you for bugs and then take you to the secret location.

You, boy.

Identification.

So, Tim Brown,

what makes you think you've got what it takes to become a SKUL agent?

Because that boy is using a scanner to read credit cards

and that girl is using a multi-wave code breaker,

meaning they could be hacking into the bank accounts of everyone here,

including yours.

I'm impressed.

Anita Blackwell.

Anita, show Tim around.

Looks like you may have some competition.

So, what does she mean by a competition.

Don't you know anything?

SKUL are looking for agents to go on a new assignment, Operation Z12.

-What's Operation Z12?

-All I know is that only one pupil

gets chosen to do it, and that person's me. Don't you forget it.

Here, have some coffee

and some donuts.

I'll give you donuts

when you start giving me answers.

Now you tell me what you know about Operation Z12.

-Yes, the last thing we want is to see you in jail.

-Jail?

When I'm done with you jail will look like a five star hotel

-with daily foot massage.

-You do know it's meant to be

good cop, bad cop not stupid cop, even more stupid cop.

Maybe I'll leave you to it,

I think I'm just making her angry.

By the way,

you were even more stupid cop.

Tim Brown, you're late.

Thanks for telling me assembly was on the other side of the school.

Hey, what are friends for?

I promise to do my worst, to be deceitful, scheming and vile.

All hail the Grand Master.

Look at you all, like sheep.

Here we are looking for individuals,

those brave enough to go it alone,

for only the most driven will be embraced into the family of SKUL.

Today we continue our trials for Operation Z12.

May the most magnificent pupil win.

Below you is a fate far worse than death.

Only by answering correctly will you avoid it.

Question one.

What chemical would best dissolve a bank safe?

BUZZER Hydrofluoric acid.

Is correct.

You must now nominate a victim.

'A victim?'

Have you got a problem with that, Brown?

No. No.

I nominate Liam.

Arrrrgh!

Question two. Name this infamous SKUL agent.

BUZZER Simian Blake.

-Dug his way out of prison using only his teeth.

-Is correct.

Nominate.

I nominate Jessica.

Aaaaargh!

At your feet are a satnav and DVD player.

Reconfigure them into a laser weapon to hit this target, starting now.

Tim Brown, you may now nominate.

I nominate Ani... No, wait.

I nominate Douglas.

Aaargh!

Interesting.

Statistically Anita is your strongest opponent

and yet you did not eliminate her. Why?

Well, you know what they say.

Keep your friends close

and your enemies closer.

(Rose, it's me, do you read?)

Oscar, you're three minutes late.

I'm sorry, I should have asked SKUL if I could talk to MI9.

Sorry, it's just we saw you do that test.

Yes. You sent those kids to a fate worse than death.

Relax, apparently they got sent

to clean out General Flopsy's hutch for a month.

Besides, they were useless.

-So any news on what Z12 is?

-All I know is apparently one of us

gets chosen to do whatever it is.

Wait, I think I heard someone.

I told you this is crazy.

He's right. Every time he reports in we're putting him in danger.

Then let's hope Carrie's having more luck.

Don't tell me, more questions.

No.

Just some pictures.

And I want you to relax and just tell me what each one says to you.

OK?

Mmm, roast lamb and mint sauce.

Urgh, one ugly, screaming poo machine.

Who's that frumpy looking...

Wait a minute, where did you get that picture?

It's you. Aged six. What can you see Suki?

Oh, I get it.

Deep down I'm cute and innocent and maybe I shouldn't work for SKUL,

maybe I should tell you what Operation Z12 is.

Unbelievable.

-Don't you have a heart?

-No!

Don't you have any interrogation skills?

Question, what is a SKUL agent's best friend?

It is...

your field operations unit.

Today you will learn how to strip

and reassemble the unit in under 30 seconds.

And begin.

If your avatar has been defeated

-you will be electrocuted.

-Aah!

-At which point...

-Aah!

..you are eliminated.

This test is designed to see who has the killer instinct

and who does not.

-Gah!

-Yes!

-Ha!

-Ah!

That's not fair. I knocked him out. He should have been out of the game.

A good agent should be able to control the pain.

I'll do whatever it takes to be the best.

-I'll do whatever it takes to be the best.

-It's weird.

There's something in his voice, something...ruthless.

You hang around SKUL long enough and this is what happens.

'Rose, it's me, do you read?'

Yeah, hi. How's it going?

Look, I don't know any more about Operation Z12

but reporting in every hour is impossible.

It was a direct order from Chief Agent Stark.

Stark's not the one with his neck on the line.

'Either you trust me or you don't.'

Oscar, it's not a case of trust...

Then I'll report when I can.

Oh, and I know when you're lying.

Oscar. Oscar!

Well, at least we can see what he's up to.

They're only jealous.

Most of our pupils have never seen anyone of your ability.

Single minded, quick thinking, your talents are rare.

Back in my old school

whatever I did I'd seem to get in trouble for it.

Then they clearly had no idea of your potential.

I'm sorry, I didn't realise it was top secret.

Please, I think I can trust you.

The Grand Master wants to break an agent out of a Moscow state prison.

-You're going to tunnel in through the sewers?

-You have a problem with that?

Russians use sewers to transport soldiers all over.

You go in there you're dead meat.

Then, thank you.

I'm sure the Grand Master will be most interested.

Unbelievable. Now he's helping SKUL plan a mission.

-It's called being undercover.

-She didn't even ask for your help.

-You didn't have to tell her about the sewer.

-Thanks for the support!

Typical MI9.

Typical MI9? You do remember what side you work for?

I'm just doing things my way. At least around here they appreciate it.

OK, so you are never going to tell me what Z12 is?

-First thing you've got right all day.

-Then something's bugging me.

If you're so good, how come you let us find this data card?

Something's bugging me too.

If your brain's so small, why doesn't it just roll out of those huge ears?

It's always engaged.

Aaargh!

No loo roll.

I give up. OK? That girl is such a...

What's the matter?

It's Oscar. Something's wrong,

he's just not himself any more. We need to get him out of that academy.

Only Stark won't let us until we find out about Operation Z12.

You have to find a way to make Suki talk.

For Oscar's sake find a way.

Hello everyone.

Now, about my accordion recital.

Oh, honestly, if anyone actually turns up

I'll dress up as a Boldovian goat herder.

Anyway, I was thinking of opening with a little number entitled

March of the Flatulent Wildebeest.

HE PLAYS REALLY BADLY

Carrie please, I think I've rehearsed enough.

Besides, one can be over prepared.

Sir, you could rehearse all day and still not get any worse.

Really?

TERRIBLE MUSIC PLAYS

I can't take any more!

Make it stop!

Only when you give me answers.

Never.

VOLUME INCREASES

As you know, SKUL has been looking for one of you

to join Operation Z12.

I can now reveal the name of the successful pupil.

The pupil going forward to Operation Z12 is...

All right, all right! Enough! You win.

Sorry? Didn't quite catch that.

I said you win, OK? You win!

MUSIC STOPS SHE SIGHS

Now,

tell me what Z12 is.

Z12 isn't a what, it's a who.

Operation Z12 is a person.

The name of the successful pupil is...

-Tim Brown.

-Yes! Get in!

APPLAUSE

Congratulations SKUL agent Brown.

Hey, no hard feelings.

-Ah!

-Seriously, haven't you learned anything.

What is he doing?

That was such a mean thing to do.

It was such a SKUL thing to do.

I knew he couldn't be trusted.

Hang on, let's just be thankful

we're going to find out what Operation Z12 is.

Forget it, I already know.

Operation Z12 is Oscar.

Think about it.

Why would Suki be spying on MI9 in the first place?

SKUL wanted us to send him to the academy.

This whole thing was a trap to get Oscar near the Grand Master.

At last...I meet the notorious Tim Brown,

one of the finest students this academy has ever produced.

-And ready to serve you in Operation Z12, sir.

-Excellent.

I need an agent who can work alone, take risks,

and be answerable to no-one but himself.

Sounds like Oscar's dream job.

Oscar would never betray MI9.

Would he?

But before you can appreciate the sheer genius

of Operation Z12 there is someone you should meet.

Someone who has been following your progress

with great pride and joy.

-Hello Oscar.

-Mum.

It all makes sense. SKUL treats Oscar like a hero,

-then they bring on Jade.

-No, but he hates her.

She's betrayed him every time.

And how does Oscar feel about MI9 right now?

That we don't trust him.

Oh, so it's my fault now, is it?

I know I'm probably the last person you wanted to see again.

There's no probably about it.

I'm hoping given time you'll realise how both our lives

have been leading up to this moment.

Honestly, will you listen to yourself?

-Why can't you just stay out of my life?

-Because you are my life.

He's switched off his eyebrow cam.

That's it! I'm sending in a team to sort this out.

-How? We don't know where the academy is.

-Actually,

I fitted a homing beacon inside Oscar's eyebrow.

-You see, you didn't trust him either.

-No, I never underestimate SKUL.

Now come on, he needs our help.

So, you knew I wasn't Tim Brown all along.

My apologies for the deception.

Setting a trap for your own son. That's low, even for you.

I think we'll leave you and your son to talk, Number one.

Number one?

I'm the Grand Master's right hand now.

But with you beside me even he can't stand in our way forever.

What? You want to overthrow the Grand Master and you want me to help you?

All I ever wanted was for us to be a family.

And I know that's what you want too.

But I just can't trust you.

Well, then why did I lead you here to this academy?

Why go through all this if I didn't love you, Oscar?

Why?

Wait.

Let's go.

You're the best agent this academy has ever seen.

Together we can control SKUL as mother and son.

You want me to leave MI9?

The people who doubted you, held you back at every stage?

We've been through a lot together.

But they are not your family and you've never really felt

like you fit in back there,

not if you're honest.

I don't know.

I need time to think.

Oscar, ever since your dad died for MI9,

and for nothing,

you've been all I have.

We need each other.

How does a gobstopper slow the body down?

Only one way to find out.

Stop! Intruders!

That must be your so-called friends.

You see, they obviously don't trust you.

All your life MI9 has told you what to do, made decisions for you,

like it's even a choice.

It's not their choice.

-And you're right, none of them respect me.

-Then what are you saying?

I'm saying...

I want to join SKUL.

Really?

Quick, there's an escape tunnel, we can be out of here in no time.

And leave the Grand Master?

-It's about you and me now.

-But we need him.

He's the only one who can tell us every secret SKUL's ever had.

You're right. I always knew you had the brains of the family.

Oscar, come on, this way!

Oscar!

Come back!

There you are. I thought you'd abandoned me.

We're going to get you out of here.

I got these old jet packs from the storeroom.

You see, Grand Master, I told you Oscar would join us eventually.

Now we can rise as the greatest criminal trio ever.

-ENGINE SPUTTERS

-What?

-The confounded thing doesn't work.

-Mine doesn't either.

-Yeah, that's cos I took the starter motors out.

-What?

-Why you...

-Getting you two in the same place

just in time for the gobstopper to wear off.

Oscar, what are you playing at?

Yes, what are you playing at?

Jade, you're under arrest. The same goes for you.

-MI9, nobody move.

-Yes, nobody move.

But I thought we were going to be a family.

Get real. SKUL isn't a family, just some loser in a dressing gown.

For the last time, it's not a dressing gown it's a...

-ALL:

-Ceremonial robe.

We know.

You'll pay for that insult.

You'll all pay.

Goodbye.

How did he do that?

I hot wired his jet pack. Nobody crosses me and gets away with it.

That's the thing about SKUL.

All such lovely people.

Is this what you want?

Taking orders from people not even half as good as you.

These people are my friends.

They risked their lives to come and help me.

But I know you were tempted. It's not too late to join us.

Us?

Thanks to your lies there is no us, just you

in a very lonely prison cell.

Take her away.

Oscar please, you don't mean this.

Oscar, I'm still your mother!

You'll never be alone as long as we're around,

you know that don't you?

LIGHT APPLAUSE

So, as you can see, Boldovia has a veritable treasure chest...

Are you sure you're OK?

I mean everyone's here with their families.

Hey, you guys are my family.

Cor, does that mean you'll lend me a tenner, then?

For my next tune I'm going to be accompanied on vocals

by Mrs King, dressed as a traditional Boldovian goat herder.

Mrs King, you can come out now.

Mrs King?

LAUGHTER

Just when you thought things couldn't get any worse.

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