Panto Me Too!

# Come on and get on down to the city

# Where the trains all clatter through

# Hey! Look at that driver driving

-# I want to ride that train of blue

-Me too

# I'm looking way up high to the windows

# Take a peek for an inside view

# All these people busy working

# I want to see what they all do

# Come on, let's weave around the market

# Do you hear the hullabaloo?

# Everybody's busy selling

-# I wanna buy me something new

-Me too

# Look through the arches under the station

# Down where the pigeons perch and coo

# Take a taxi ride to the river

# I wanna drive down the avenue

# Hey, look at those buses gleaming

# They look so clean and spanking new

# All lined up to drive around the city

-# Let me ting that bell

-Ding, ding!

# Going to ride on round to the school stop

# Where the children hurry through

# Sit down, the teacher's teaching

-# I'd love to learn a thing or two

-Me too

# I love to skip in Riverseafingal

# Riverseafingal, by the sea. #

10 o'clock.

# Come on and get on down to the city

-# Where the ferryboat sails are blue

-Sails are blue

# Time to call on Granny Murray

# She'd love to say hello to you! #

Hello, honey pie!

Come away in and see who's at home today.

# Granny Murray's house has two at home to play

# Granny Murray's house is home to... #

Who's here today? Well...

we've got Ashley and Eva.

Don't just sit there, poppets, come on, on your feet.

We're going to play a wee game called Grandmother's Footsteps.

What did I hear?

Oh, they're very good, they're very still.

You missed it.

Let's see if I can catch you moving.

Whoo! Ah-ha-ha-ha!

Well done, my girls, that was brilliant!

Well, we've got Ashley and we've got Eva.

But someone's missing from home today.

GATE CREAKS

Oh, not any more. Who's coming home to Granny Murray?

Oh, yes, it's Lisa, with Tina.

Hello there! Ha-ha!

Tina! Aha!

And Lisa. Come away through, honey pies.

We've been playing Grandmother's Footsteps before you got here.

Oh, all that, "Behind you!" Makes me think of the pantomime

-that Raymond and I are putting on in Drumtown.

-Your panto!

That gives me an idea.

Why don't you all dress Claude up as a pantomime dame?

And we can sit on our seats, dear.

Oh, no we can't!

Oh, yes, we can!

Ha-ha! Oh-hoo!

How's your pantomime coming along? Dick Whittington?

That's right. Oh, rehearsals are hilarious.

-You should see Raymond in his dame's wig.

-I bet he suits it!

-He does!

Lisa's just dying to see the show.

Me too! Now, it's in Drumtown Playhouse, isn't it?

-That's right. I'll take you in my taxi with Lisa.

-Oh, thanks, poppet.

For you and Raymond, all the world's a stage.

We just love performing everywhere.

Wow, look at Claude!

Behind you!

Oh, Claude! We could have you in our panto, dressed like that.

I'd best be off to work now.

For me? Oh, it's a little cat like Dick Whittington's. Mwah!

You have fun today.

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

-Bye-bye, see you later.

-Come on then, Tina.

Now remember, all the world's a stage.

-Thank you, Granny Murray, see you later.

-We'll be thinking of you.

Me too!

Will you keep a wee eye on Tina

and make sure she goes the right way to work?

I'd better hurry. Could you tell me the fastest way to get to work?

Thank you.

# I'm in, in, in, in, in a hurry

# I nee, nee, nee, need to speed to work

# I take a, take a ticket on the subway

# I'll be, be, be, be, be, be there quite quick.

# Hurry, hurry, hurry through the tunnel

# Clatter, clatter, clatter underground

# Whining, whining, whining drives the speed up

# Squeaking, squeaking, squeaking slows us down

# Clatter, clatter, clatter

# Squeaking, squeaking, squeaking to our stop

# I'm in, in, in, in, in a hurry

# I need to speed to work. #

Phew! What now?

Of course! I have to get ready for work.

Hm, the engine sounded funny then.

I thought so.

There's something wrong.

Ah, it's the alternator.

Now, where is my...?

Oh, there it is.

This spare alternator looks a bit old.

But it might do the job until I can buy a new one.

-Ooh!

-Oh! Ha-ha! Sorry, Tina. Have you got a problem?

Yes, my alternator's broken.

I've got a spare one to fit, but I don't think it'll last long.

My mate Terry can help you out. He knows everything about electrics.

I'm sure he can fix it.

-Oh, that's brilliant. Thanks, Mickey John.

-OK.

Here, shove it in my bag.

-Right, I'll be back later. Bye!

-Bye!

Don't worry, Lisa, I'll get you to Drumtown to see our panto.

# I love to skip in Riverseafingal Riverseafingal by the sea

# I love to skip in Riverseafingal Riverseafingal, that's for me. #

We've nearly got our panto picnic finished.

What about a beautiful princess?

-Will we give her a lovely skirt?

-Yes.

-There we are.

And here's our magic wand.

Are you looking forward to seeing Mum and Dad on the stage? Me too!

Are you working hard, Mummy?

That's it, all done.

-What are you doing, my dove?

-I'm fixing the engine.

-The alternator went up the spout.

-Jolly good.

Shouldn't you be getting the stage ready for our panto?

-Yes, I've just popped in to get my wig.

-Oh, of course!

I'll be there before you arrive with Granny and Lisa in your taxi.

Great, I'll see you there.

Mwah! Mwah!

Well, now that I've fitted the spare alternator into my taxi engine,

it's time I got down to some hard work.

# City roads are waiting

# Traffic lights are changing

# Police cars are cruising

# The truckers keep on trucking

# And the city roads are waiting

# For me to take a drive in my pretty pink taxi... #

Taxi!

# People wave me down in my pretty pink taxi

# Get into the back And just relax for the ride

# Pretty pink taxi She's going for a drive... #

TOOT! TOOT!

# Look in the mirror Shift that gear

# Pull into the busy lane My pretty pink taxi takes the strain

# The radio calls up a taxi fare Who am I going to meet?

TOOT! TOOT!

# Looking for a job in my pretty pink taxi

# Oh-oh

# Whoo! Cruising the city in my pretty pink taxi

# Yeah!

# Drive, drive, drive in my pretty pink taxi

# Ride, ride, ride

# Where you wanna go... #

Taxi!

# Cos I need to take a ride in my pretty pink taxi

# People wave me down and relax for the ride. #

That engine still doesn't sound right.

Ooh! Mm-mm-mm-hm.

Are you still here?

Oh! Yes, love of my life.

I'm just going over my lines. I'm word perfect.

That's my boy!

But now I must dash to Drumtown.

-Maybe you should take the wig off first, Raymond.

-Oh, good idea!

After I pick up Granny Murray and Lisa, we'll be right behind you.

Mwah!

Oh. I'm going to pick you up at Granny Murray's soon, Lisa.

# I love to skip in Riverseafingal Riverseafingal, that's for me. #

Mum'll be here soon, my darling.

She won't be long now, angel.

Don't you worry, Lisa, Mum'll be here to pick us up soon.

'Where are you, Mummy?'

Oh, flip! I'm late!

Catastrophe! I got chatting to Chuck and missed my train to Drumtown.

Don't worry, we can all go together in my taxi.

Granny Murray and Lisa would love to ride

-with the star of the show.

-Good thinking.

ENGINE STUTTERS

Oh!

Oh, no!

Oh! The spare alternator has packed up

and I haven't had a chance to get a new one.

Oh, Mickey John.

Oh, thank goodness! Did your friend manage to mend my alternator?

No, my friend wasn't as good as I thought he was.

He did manage to take your alternator apart,

but he couldn't put it back together again.

Oh! I am meant to be taking Granny Murray and Lisa to Drumtown

the see the panto, but Raymond's missed his train

and now I can't get my taxi to move. How did this happen?

Where did the time go?

At 10 o'clock, I dropped Lisa at Granny Murray's.

I told her about the panto Raymond and I were doing later

and I promised I'd take her to Drumtown for the panto.

At 11 o'clock, I got to the garage.

But my taxi had a problem with its engine.

The alternator was broken.

Mickey John called by. He took the alternator away to his friend.

Then I fitted a spare alternator to keep my taxi going in the meantime.

At 12 o'clock, Raymond came to the garage to find some panto props.

At 4 o'clock, I realised I was late to pick up Granny Murray and Lisa.

Then Raymond arrived. He had missed his train.

So we got into my taxi.

But it wouldn't start.

And Mickey John's friend hadn't mended the alternator either.

So no-one can go to Drumtown to see our panto.

Now remember, all the world's a stage.

All the world's a stage.

Well, of course!

We can't do the panto in Drumtown

so we'll do it right here, in the garage.

Right, Mickey John, you go and find Granny Murray and Lisa

and anyone else you can round up.

Raymond and I will tell the story of Dick Whittington and his cat

right here in the Arches Theatre. It's a race against time.

# I've got to do it I've got to do it

# I've got to beat the clock before the chime

# I've got to sort it I've got to sort it

# I've got to do the job on time

# Like a busy bee I'm going to beat that bong

# I'm going to finish this job before you finish that song

# Do we think she's going to do it?

# Do the job that needs to be done

# Will she know how to fix it?

# Will she finish what she has begun?

# Just as sure as we are friends She will get there in the end

# Because she knows what she should do

-# I'm going to do it

-She's going to do it

# I'm going to beat the clock before the chime

-# I'm going to sort it

-She's going to sort it

# I'm going to do the job on time

# Like a busy bee I'm going to beat that bong

# I'm going to finish this job before I finish this song! #

Ladies and gentlemen, the Arches Theatre Company proudly presents

Dick Whittington And His Cat.

-Hurrah!

-Hurrah!

Oh, I'm fed up being just a poor orphan boy with nothing to eat.

I'm off to London...

and I'll make my fortune, or my name's not Dick Whittington.

I could do with a kip.

Oh, who's this asleep on my doorstep. Poor lad.

-Oh!

-I'm Alderman Fitzwarren.

-Any work going, guv?

-Indeed, you can work in the kitchen.

I'll just call my daughter Alice. Alice!

Alice, this is Dick. He's going to stay in the spare room.

Night-night!

Squeak! Squeak!

Oh! Oh, crumbs! My bedroom's full of rats!

First thing tomorrow, I'm going to the shops to buy a cat.

Ah, I'd like a cat, please.

A pussy cat? That'll be one penny, please.

Ooh!

Here, Puss, Puss, Puss!

Miaow!

Come on, Puss, let's go.

Hey, Puss! That ship's sailing to Zanzibar. We can have an adventure.

All aboard!

Ha-ha-ha!

Hello, young man, welcome to Zanzibar.

Hello, Mush!

-My land is overrun with rats - look!

-Oh.

I'm the king of the rats, so watch it!

You don't scare me...or my cat.

Hop it!

Ah, a moggy, I'm off!

Bye, rat face!

-Will this do?

-Oh, thanks. Come on, Puss.

Let's go home and ask Alice to marry me.

Miaow!

-Hello, Dick.

-Any chance of marrying Alice and living happily ever after?

I don't see why not.

Oh, Dick, I'm so happy!

APPLAUSE

-We're a hit, darling.

-Oh, yes.

I think Lisa enjoyed it.

Tina!

Come away in.

Your mum's here, Lisa.

Hello, Lisa!

-Hello, Mummy.

-Oh.

-Thank you.

-Come here. A big squeezy cuddle!

Thanks from me too, Granny Murray. I remembered what you said.

"All the world's a stage." It saved the day.

Oh, I'm pleased. Come on, you two. Let's get you home.

Come on, Lisa.

Bye-bye, my darlings!

Looking forward to next time.

-Me too.

-And...raarrrgh!

-Raarrrgh!

-Come on, Lisa, shall we go and talk about our time away?

-No, a drive!

I suppose you'll want me to tell you all about my time too.

# Well, there was...

# Cuddling, walking, pushing

# Dancing, sharing, talking

# Cooking, drying, cleaning

# Loving, joking, music things

# And rushing around

# Dressing up and sitting down! #

Ha!

But what was really special about today?

Well, Claude was dressed as a pantomime dame

because we were going to watch Dick Whittington And His Cat.

Raymond and Tina were the stars of the show.

Later, we sat on the doorstep for ages waiting for Tina's taxi.

Then there was a change of plan.

Instead of doing the panto in Drumtown,

Tina and Raymond made a special stage at the garage

and we watched their panto there. It was really funny!

Raymond had to keep changing his costumes.

It was lucky that Tina remembered that all the world's a stage.

I hope you enjoyed yourself.

Me too!

Bye-bye, honey pie!

# I love to skip in Riverseafingal Riverseafingal by the sea

# I love to skip in Riverseafingal Riverseafingal, that's for me

# Come on and get on down to the city

# Where the ferry boat sails are blue

# Time to call on Granny Murray

# She'd love to say goodbye to you! #