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# Life's so great in a console space Digitally here again

# So much more than a pixel face

# Living in a game, a game, a game

# We're playing with the same old friends

# Everybody knows our name

# We'll be here till the journey ends

# Living in a game, a game A game a game. #

Ah!

Perfect.

Ooh, nearly forgot to polish the polish.

Ah! Oh, terrific(!)

Riley, I have spent the entire morning cleaning this room.

Would you please make a bit more of an effort?

Sorry, Claireparker.

This is the Console. Groove Academy 2 session complete.

Kiki Nova released.

Guys, I've got the most amazing news.

See if you can guess what it is.

What is the most unbelievably

exciting thing that could possibly happen in my game?

It finishes, and my game comes on?

What? No!

I've reached a bonus level.

A costume competition. The character in the best outfit wins.

Ooh, I best decide what I'm going to wear.

Er, Kiki? Who do you think's going to put those away?

Ah. Sorry.

Thanks, Claireparker!

Uh...

Will somebody else please help me put things away?

Am I the only one who ever clears up around here?

Well! Maybe you wouldn't be so upset if you weren't so...

-What?

-So, er, so...

-nnnnnngggg!

-What?!

She just means you're a bit, you know...

nnnngar!

I am not nnnngar!

Whatever that means. I just like things clean

and tidy and not covered...

Rex? Is that marmalade?

No... Yes.

Rex, why have you put marmalade on the wall?

So people wouldn't notice the jam I spilled on the floor?

Oh! Oh, This place is a tip.

From now on, please can we have a rule that says no-one can clutter

up the place with pointless rubbish?

Hey, everybody, look what I found!

-Well, that rule lasted about as long as I expected it to.

-What is it?

It's a new bit of furniture. It's one of those

flat-pack ones you put together yourself.

It's missing the instructions so I'm not sure what it's supposed to be.

I bet it's a see-saw! That'd be brilliant!

Don't be absurd.

Why would we be given something so utterly pointless?

I could go on it with, I don't know, Alexia.

We could spend the afternoon gazing into each other's eyes.

No, no, no. I suspect it's a decorative cabinet

in which to display my fencing foil.

Oh yeah, that sounds a lot more useful(!)

I would expect that sort of opinion

from a Neanderthal like you, Sergeant Riley.

Just because you're too much of a lumbering oaf

to learn the most noble of the combative arts.

Fencing requires grace

and courage!

Argh! Argh, mercy!

Hey, I know.

We should just start putting it together ourselves,

and then work out what it is as we go along!

Ha! An excellent idea. It certainly

doesn't sound like anything would go wrong with that plan.

Woah, woah. Are you

two forgetting what happened last time you tried to do it yourself?

Hmmm. She's got a point. I mean,

I've been glued to this chair for three days.

Claireparker, why do you always have to be so... nnnngggg?

-What did you say?

-He's right!

You are being a little, nnnnggg!

No, no, no, it's not like that,

it's more like...unnnggghhh!

No, no, no, it's more like a sort of nnnggarrrr!

Oh, shut up, all of you! I am not...

This is the Console. Return to Zombie City now loading.

-Would Claireparker please enter the game?

-Nnnngggg!

ALL: Yes! That's it! That's the one!

Bang on the button!

Ah-choo!

-Oh, poor me, oh!

-What's wrong with the overgrown tin opener?

Oh, I'm at death's door, mate, that's what's wrong with me.

Take no notice of him. He's just feeling sorry for himself.

-Just cos he's got a spot of robot flu.

-Oh!

-I didn't know robots could get flu.

-Oh, yes, it's going around, mate.

I reckon I caught it off someone in here.

Whee, whee, whoo!

Seems possible.

"A bit nnnngggg."

I mean, just because I put stuff away and don't smear food

on the walls, that's not a bad thing.

Why should I apologise? If everyone

was a bit more like me, maybe we wouldn't have these arguments.

What do you think they meant by "a bit nnnngggg"?

Sorry, I forgot, you can't talk, can you?

Mm! Er, hoo!

Oh, you know charades? OK!

Four words.

Oh, three words.

Two words.

Maybe just do the whole thing.

Er, me?

You? You're?

You're. Small word?

Is? Of?

All right, there's a lot of them!

Er, it? A?

A.

OK. Game? Gaming?

Game controller?

Control? Ah!

Sounds like... Oh!

Sounds like speak?

Oh, sounds like speak.

Chic?

Freak?

"You're a control freak."

I am not a control freak!

Now, get out of here before I pull the other ear off.

Oi! Are you going to pick those fingers up?

-How's it going, Romford?

-Ah-choo!

Oh, fine, fine, I'll be ready in a second.

Alexia, it may have rather escaped your attention but I am a state of

the art, highly advanced, A-Class armoured combat drone.

Don't you think this is just a little bit beneath me?

All the other sockets were full!

-SHE CLEARS THROAT

-Alexia? Romford?

May I ask you a question?

Would you give me an honest reply?

-Do you think I'm a bit...?

-What, a bit of a control freak? Yes, I do.

Well, how did you know what I was going to ask?

Just a lucky guess, and the fact

that you always eat spaghetti letters in alphabetical order.

Well, no more. From now on, I'm relaxed. I'm easy.

Right. So you'd be OK if, say, I were to put this

cup of tea down without a coaster?

Yeah, I'd be fine with that.

And what if I were to take this jacket off its peg,

which has been so neatly hung, throw it across the middle of the floor?

That's be fine, too?

-No problems here.

-What if you were to leave your bed unmade?

Could you bear to go through the day knowing that

the sheets were crumpled and the pillows were piled wrongly,

and the duvet...?

Oh, all right! All right! Stop it!

Come along, Romford. Let's leave her to it.

She's so chilled out, I think her head's about to explode!

A-a-ah-choo!

Sorry about that, Claireparker, I haven't got a hanky with me.

-Oh, oh dear.

-Thanks, Romford(!)

I think I'm off to get myself some menthol batteries.

Oh, see you later...

Reset?

-Ah-choo!

-Oi! Sneezatron!

Yeah, what?

What's that big red button underneath the panel?

Oh, that? That's the reset button.

You mustn't touch that. Ah-choo! Oh, dear!

-Why? What does it do?

-Oh, dear.

It puts things back how they were. And it...

Ah-choo! Oh, dear! I've had enough of this.

I'm going to go off and give myself a nice steam and wax.

Oh, dear me! Anyone got any tinfoil? I need a hanky.

Reset?

RELAXING MUSIC PLAYS

MUSIC STOPS

Ah! And chill out!

Mmm. Go with the flow.

Today is going to be a good day, a great day.

Ow!

What are you doing?

-Morning!

-And whatever it is you're doing,

please can you stop doing it now?

I've got to sort out my fancy-dress costume.

I've narrowed it down to three.

Hawaiian surfer...

cowgirl...

or rhinoceros. What do you think?

I'm finding it hard to put into words what I'm thinking.

I know, they're all amazing, right?

I thought, if I combine the three,

and go as a surfing cowgirl rhinoceros, I'm bound to win!

This is the Console. Groove Academy 2 now loading.

Would Kiki Nova please enter the game?

Better go. Wish me luck!

Luck!

Kiki, what about this mess?

No, relax, just go with the flow.

From now on, today is going to be an almost perfect day.

-Oh, no!

-Using too much glue, you hairy oaf!

-Listen!

-You want it all to stick together, don't you?

-What are you two doing?

I thought you had no idea what you were supposed to be making?

We don't, but we flipped a coin and I won, so we're making my see-saw.

Unless you think it should be a fencing foil cabinet.

-What do you think?

-What do I think?

I think you two should pack this all away, and never attempt to make

anything more complicated than a cup of hot water ever again.

Right, see-saw it is, then!

-There! Ah.

-Rex!

-Sorry!

-Ah!

Oh, from now on I do the glueing, OK?

Two down - four-legged animal found in cold climates.

-Easy, reindeer.

-Er, three letters.

Easy. P-Q-Z!

-No!

-Y-N-X?

-Riley.

-P-L-C. J-L-S. W-M-D.

Eat your sandwich, Riley.

Riley? You're not going to make a mess with that sandwich, are you?

Sorry.

Never mind!

I'm easy. I'm so chilled, you could make ice cubes in my pants.

This is the Console.

Groove Academy 2 session complete.

Kiki Nova released.

How did it go, Kiki?

I came last. The judge said it wasn't a costume,

more of a terrible nightmare that came to life.

Do you know what he meant?

There! It's finished!

-I call it the romantic see-saw!

-Let me give it a try.

CRASHING

Erm, yeah, you go first.

You all right, Claireparker? You look like your head is about to pop.

I'm fine. I just need to sit down.

Yeah...

Don't sit on that chair.

We needed to borrow some screws from it, you see.

Right, that's it.

This day is officially over.

I'm going back to bed.

What's up with her?

So, who fancies a see-saw?

Tomorrow's another day, eh?

Well, that's exactly what I need.

You put things back, don't you?

Well, as long as it helps with the tidying up,

I don't see what harm it can do.

My head!

Kiki, I just had the weirdest dream. Ow!

-Morning!

-What's going on?

-I've got to sort out my fancy-dress costume.

I've narrowed it down to three.

Hawaiian surfer, cowgirl or...rhinoceros.

-What do you think?

-What are you talking about?

I know, they're all amazing, right?

So what I thought is, I'd just combine all three and go as

a surfing cowgirl rhinoceros. I'm bound to win.

Kiki, have you been at the cough syrup again?

-Eh?

-The competition has already happened.

You lost because you wore that crazy rhino head, remember?

Yeah, you're right.

It's a bit too much. Shame.

This is the Console.

Groove Academy 2 now loading. Will Kiki Nova please enter the game?

-Better go. Wish me luck.

-Kiki, wait.

What's going on?

Kiki wouldn't forget something that had only

happened an hour ago, would she?

Oh, no, hang on. That's exactly the sort of thing Kiki would do.

You're using too much glue, you furry oaf.

Listen, you want it to stick together, don't you?

Would you mind telling me what's going on.

We're putting this flat-pack together.

-We don't know what it's supposed to be so we...

-Flipped a coin?

-That's right.

-Are you all right, Claireparker?

I've got really bad deja vu.

Yeah, I have some wonderful ointment you can borrow,

clear that right up. And a little inflatable cushion for sitting on.

No, deja vu. You know?

When you're convinced something has already happened before.

Right. Of course.

What? Carry on.

Right. Well, this see-saw isn't going to build itself.

Oh, I'm pretty sure it's not supposed to be a see-saw.

Ha-ha! In your face, fur ball.

-A fencing-foil cabinet, it is.

-Two down - four-legged animal

found in cold climate.

Easy, reindeer.

-Three letters.

-Easy, P-D-Q.

-No.

-Y-M-X?

-Riley!

-P-L-C, J-L-S, W-M-D.

Eat your sandwich, Riley.

This is so strange.

I feel like I know exactly what's going to happen next.

Really? We're all ears.

Ah!

-Sorry.

-This is the Console. Groove Academy 2 session complete.

Kiki Nova released.

-How did it go, Kiki?

-I came third.

The judge said I was a very convincing, colour-blind lunatic.

Do you know what he meant?

There we are, finished.

The display cabinet for my fencing foils.

Of course, the button.

It must be the button.

Thanks, Riley.

It had to happen. Her tiny brain's finally given up on her.

I clearly needed more glue.

That was your fault.

Right, you've done it once.

Presumably you can do it again.

Let's get it right this time.

RELAXING MUSIC PLAYS

Ow!

Sorry.

# I act real shallow but I'm in too deep

# Everybody says that I've gotta get a grip

# But I let sanity give me the slip

-# Bonkers

-Some people think I'm bonkers

# But I just think I'm free

# And I'm just living my life There's nothin' crazy about me

# Some people pay for thrills But I get mine for free

# Man I'm just livin' my life There's nothing crazy about me

-# Bonkers

-Some people think I'm bonkers

# But I just think I'm free... #

-Morning.

-Morning!

-Now, forget the Hawaiian stuff

and lose the rhino head, it makes you look insane.

-But...

-That hat, those boots, the red shirt, skirt and the waistcoat.

And you're bound to win.

Now, go on, you'll get called into your game any second.

-This is the Console. Groove Academy 2 now loading.

-See?

Go, go, go.

You're using too much glue, you hairy oaf.

Listen, you want it to stick together, don't you?

Rex, it's not a see-saw.

Aethelwynne, it's not a display cabinet.

It's a coffee table.

Now, you don't need this or this.

You put that bit into that bit.

You screw that to that, you screw that bit into that bit. Job done.

Now, chop chop.

-Two down is elk, four across is Istanbul, 11 down is hedgehog.

-Oh!

You're welcome.

This is the Console.

Groove Academy 2 session complete. Kiki Nova released.

Kiki, how did you get on?

I won.

Excellent. Boys, how are you doing?

Great, I think we're finished.

Fabulous. Here's to a perfect day.

-What's wrong, everyone?

-Nothing, it's just...thanks for

helping with my costume and everything, but I think I'd

have preferred to wear something a bit more fun, even if I didn't win.

-What?

-This is a perfectly adequate coffee table.

But I think we'd have preferred to work it out for ourselves.

-What?

-I would have got those crossword clues eventually.

You've kind of, you know, taken the fun out of everything.

Fun?

I can't believe you!

I've spent hours trying to make everything go perfectly today

and all you can do is complain that it's not fun.

-Why does everything have to be perfect?

-Yeah.

Nobody's perfect.

That's right, nobody is perfect.

But we could all try a little bit harder, couldn't we?

Hmm? I mean, Kiki, if you were a bit less ditzy,

and Riley, less clumsy, and Alexia, less stuck up,

and Aethelwynne, bit less pompous,

and Rex, if you'd finally admit that you were in love with Alexia,

we'd all get on better, wouldn't we?

That's right.

And you know why I can say all this?

Because in a few seconds' time, none of you'll remember any of it.

Oh, please don't be broken. Please don't be broken.

Ah-choo! Oh, dear.

I need to clear my sinuses out. Have you seen the drill anywhere?

Blimey, what's happened to the reset button?

Oh, Romford, I've done a terrible thing.

I pressed the reset button...

Oh, I pressed the button

and it started the day again. I started to try and make everything

perfect, and I pressed it again

and again and everything was starting to go right.

But no-one wants to be told what to do,

and I was angry and I was horrible

to them all, and now the button is broken and I don't know what to do.

All right, all right, calm down, treacle. I can fix it.

-Can you?

-Yeah, of course I can.

-It might take me a few hours, though.

-In the meantime,

what am I supposed to do?

I said some unforgivable things.

You'll just have to hope that they do forgive you.

I wish you humans would leave things like that button alone.

You'd have pressed it, wouldn't you?

Of course not... I haven't got any arms.

Hi, Kiki.

SHE SCREAMS

No, it's me. It's me.

-Claireparker?

-Yeah, listen, I wanted to apologise

for the horrible things I said.

It's me that has the problem, not you.

I know I'm a bit weird about things being clean and tidy.

I suppose it's because in my game everything is always

dirty or a bit broken.

Or being eaten by a zombie.

Anyway, I shouldn't have taken it out on you.

Will you accept my apology?

Sure. But that doesn't explain why you're dressed in that...

incredibly cool way.

Well, I know I ruined your fancy-dress competition

so I thought we could have a competition of our own.

That's brilliant.

But I know what will make it even better.

Yeah, this is pretty cool.

-There you are.

-Claireparker, what are you doing?

Well, I know how much you and Rex wanted to build something

for yourselves, so I took apart the coffee table for you to use.

As well as a few other things.

You shouldn't have.

Listen, I'm the pompous one. I thought you should all be more

like me but the truth is, the other way round.

No, I mean the chairs.

-What are we going to sit on now?

-Maybe I did get a bit carried away.

-Alexia, listen...

-I'll come back.

No, no, guys, wait.

I want to apologise.

The things I said about Rex are simply not true.

Why on earth would you say he's in love with me if it wasn't true?

Why would I?

Because...

-I'm in love with Rex.

-What?

-What?

-Yeah, I was jealous and angry and I wanted Rex to notice me.

I'm sorry you got caught up in the middle of it, Alexia.

That is the weirdest thing I've ever heard.

I must say, it is something of a relief.

I mean, imagine if that were true. Rex!

How awful would that have been?

Sorry about that, Rex.

Claireparker, I'm very flattered

but I'm afraid I have some bad news for you.

-No, Rex...

-Rex Dynamo's heart belongs to another, you see.

-Rex, you don't understand...

-I'm sorry to break your heart like this.

I imagine you must be devastated.

Oh, inconsolable.

Love is a painful, painful business. Hopefully one day...

..you'll be able to get over me.

Oh, Claireparker. Now, I've repaired

the old button for you so you can put things back to how they were.

Actually, you know what, I think I'd rather leave it.

I don't think I need to press that button any more.

Fair enough. You've still got to pay the repair bill, though.

Let me see - parts, labour, there you go.

£17,000?

I haven't got that sort of money.

What about a signed picture of C-3PO and a bag of used cogs?

Ooh, done.

That flu seems to have cleared up.

Yeah, I'm just worried I might have given it to someone else.

-Ah-choo!

-Bless you.

You know what? Rather than trying to control life,

I'm going to take it as it comes.

REX SQUEALS

Ah... Perfect(!)

# Life's so great in a console space

# Digitally here again

# So much more than a pixel face

# Living in a game... #

This is the Console.

Please go to the CBBC website,

where the Pixelface games can now be played.