Jedward Remote Control Star

Have you ever wanted to control a celebrity?

Make your wish their command?

This is the show where three mates take charge of a star for the day,

controlling them through funny situations, like these.

Squirt it at him.

Accidentally spill cereal all over the place.

Oh, dear.

-Start dancing.

-# I'm the king of the jungle, yes I am! #

-Now be a duck.

-Quack quack quack!

All the action takes place in our celebrity house.

It's rigged from top to bottom with hidden cameras and microphones.

And our remote controllers will be based here...

in this hi-tech control room,

giving their star instructions via a secret earpiece.

It's time to remote control another star.

Let's meet today's remote controllers.

Hi, I'm Callum. I'm the joker of the group.

Watch out, remote control star, here I come!

Hi, I'm Graeme.

I'm the brains of the group and I always come up with good ideas.

Hi, I'm Chi. I'm really looking forward to meeting

our remote control star and playing some awesome pranks.

Chi is definitely the biggest prankster, but I'm close behind him.

I think I'm the biggest prankster.

Once we put itching powder in my dad's sleeping bag and he went mad.

The brains of the group would be me

because at school I'm always coming up with good ideas.

We like pranks.

Have you got us a star, or what?

Oh, I've got a star! In fact, I've got two!

Also, they've got a lot of energy!

Energy, energy, right. Is it Usain Bolt,

and Usain Bolt's brother?

No. They are brothers and they have amazing haircuts.

Today's stars rose to fame on the X Factor

to become pop's zaniest twins.

Today's remote control stars are...

You know, anything could happen today!

It's Jedward!

I want you guys to go crazy!

Anything you want us to do, OK? We're like your robot.

Now, the remote controllers. First, Graeme.

-What do you think about Graeme?

-Graeme looks cool.

He looks like he's up to mischief.

He'll make us to do cool things.

-What about Chi?

-He looks excited. He's got cool trainers on.

-He'll tell us to do cool things.

-Finally, Callum.

He looks like loads of fun, he's going to be a joker.

He looks like he'll get us to do loads of tricks.

-Are you ready for today?

-Yes.

-We are so ready. We are ready.

-There's your earpiece.

-It looks like a hearing aid!

Wear it for the first challenge.

So, boys, are you ready for Jedward? ALL: Yes!

Guys, are you ready for the remote controllers?

-Yes!

-We are so ready!

-Jedward, go that way for your first challenge.

-OK.

-Dude, come on, let's go!

-See you guys later.

-See you!

-Remote controllers,

-are you ready?

-ALL: Yes!

-Ask me if I'm ready?

-Are you ready?

-No.

Jedward are in position in the kitchen.

Secret cameras are covering their every move

and they can hear the orders coming from the remote controllers now.

-John, Edward, it's JK. Can you hear me?

-Hi, JK.

What do you think of the garden?

Seriously, the garden's cool. There's a playground.

There's wood everywhere.

It's a big garden to do loads of fun stuff.

The wood is actually garden furniture,

and it needs to be assembled.

-Yes.

-So, here's the deal.

Being celebrities, you can't assemble it yourselves.

We've called in a handyman to come and put up for you.

Cool!

But you can't let him get on with his job

because your challenge is to distract the handyman

with some serious celebrity twin antics.

Also, you've got to make him judge once and for all

who is best out of you two.

So, it's a special battle of the twins.

I'm going to beat you.

The controllers will tell you what to do, so you can get away with it.

-Yes!

-Good luck, boys.

They have just 15 minutes to figure out fun ways to distract

the handyman, who thinks he has come to put up a garden bench.

As always, tasks will be popping up on this screen.

Will the remote controllers be able to get John and Edward to do them?

Get ready, here we go.

Right, Clem the handyman is already assembling that bench.

Whoops!

They've got to stop him doing that!

-I'm John.

-You're John.

-I've got a blue tie.

-Blue tie.

-I've got a red tie.

-Edward's got a red tie.

Ask to look at the instructions and rip them up by mistake.

OK, OK, OK.

That's not going to help. That's not going to help me.

Get the handyman to measure your hair to find out who is the tallest.

-Do you have a ruler?

-I can get one.

Can you measure our hair?

My hair's way taller than yours.

-Mine's well taller than yours!

-Um...

Who's got the longest hair, me or Edward?

I was just about to measure it.

Measure it now.

Measure it now because we're in a rush.

I'll just pop that down there for a second.

We'll do the hair thing... Oh, wow!

-Measure my hair first. Are you ready?

-Ready.

You've got to put your head up straight.

I'm struggling here.

-What are you doing? Meant to measure straight, yeah.

-This way up.

-OK, that's coming in at seven, I'd say.

-Seven inches? Seven inches.

Get the other one measured now.

-Measure Edward's.

-Who's winning here?

It's coming in at six-and-a-half.

# I've got longer hair than you, I've got longer hair than you. #

In your face, Edward!

We've worked out that either John or Edward has the longest hair.

The one with the blue tie, anyway.

They've wasted five minutes of his time so far. Good work.

Things are about to get strenuous.

Get the handyman to decide who's the most athletic.

We want to race.

-Can you time it on your watch, really quick?

-I'm timing it.

-It's too many things at once.

-You ready?

Are you ready?

-Can you time us doing a race?

-All right.

On your marks,

get set, go.

This is thirsty work.

The remote controllers have Jedward running rings around the handyman.

Say that one of you cheated and done a false start.

-You cheated.

-I didn't cheat. I don't cheat in races.

Do another race.

-Do you want to race against us?

-OK.

I'll race you.

OK, are you ready?

On your marks, set, go.

And they're off.

Hang on, did Clem the handyman just commit a cheeky foul with his foot?

Look, the handyman's having a right laugh and most importantly,

he's not built any of that bench.

-Good work from Jedward.

-I'm beating you, I've won!

Here's another task to keep him away from his work a little bit longer.

May the best man win.

Get the handyman to decide who's the best twin.

Who do you think is the best twin so far?

That's a tough one. You're on par.

Tell him to decide who the best twin is and you'll leave him alone.

-Decide who's the best twin and we'll leave you alone.

-The best twin?

-Yes.

-Can I flip a coin?

-Yes.

It's not my choice, it's the coin's choice, the coin's deciding it.

Is it sturdy?

It's getting there.

What's going on?

-Who wants heads, who wants tails?

-Lose the coin.

Toss it, but lose the coin.

Calling it.

Where's it gone?

-Yes, heads, I've got it!

-I've got heads!

-I thought he was tails?

To decide, we'll use rock, paper scissors.

-OK.

-You be the judge, OK, ready?

Tell him to do scissors every time.

Do scissors every time.

Rock, paper, scissors. Rock, paper, scissors. Rock, paper, scissors.

Keep doing it until the handyman says shut up.

Rock, paper, scissors. Rock, paper, scissors.

Keep going.

Rock, paper, scissors. Rock, paper, scissors. Rope, paper, scissors.

Rock, paper, scissors. Rock, paper, scissors.

I'm not sure who won.

They've almost done the full 15 minutes wasting the handyman's time.

Kick the bench down by accident.

-Edward, look, you're breaking it all.

-Whatever.

Try and get...

Time's up. Let's put this handyman out of his misery.

Tell him you've been on a hidden camera TV show.

-Look at that bird there.

-There's a bird there.

Look at that bird in the window. See it?

-There?

-You're on a hidden camera show, OK?

You're on a hidden camera show!

How are you, buddy?

-I'll hold that for a minute.

-Are you serious?

-How are you?

-I've been better.

What were your first impressions of the legendary Jedward?

I was...it was impressive, I was like a little, you know,

not all there, but in a good way.

I've got an idea. I think I can beat you all in a race.

All right.

Funniest part of that challenge

was when Jedward started racing around the garden.

-We thought the handyman...

-Had the easiest and hardest job.

Because the easier part was like putting the bench

but the hardest part was having to put up with Jedward.

-Remote controllers, are you having fun?

-Yes!

Are you ready to guide Jedward

-through to the next challenge?

-Yes!

-Boys, are you ready?

-Yes!

This time, we are cranking up the pressure.

You will be under pressure for the next challenge.

Have you brought your dancing shoes with you?

-Yes, we have.

-Yes, we have.

-Good. You're going to need them.

So, you get ready for your next challenge. Good luck.

John and Edward are in the sitting room with our remote controllers,

Callum, Graeme, and Chi, standing by with instructions.

Remote controllers, headphones on and lights down.

Boys, it's JK, can you hear me?

-Hey, JK.

-Can you hear us?

We can hear you loud and clear.

-Ready for the next challenge?

-We're ready.

In a moment, a salesman is going to come around to the house.

-A salesman?

-A salesman.

-What's he selling to us?

-Doors and windows, actually.

-Cool.

-The challenge is

to get the salesmen to dance with you,

but the style must get sillier as the challenge progresses, OK?

-OK, OK, yeah.

-Remember, the remote controllers are controlling you.

-Oh, yeah.

-They're going to help you decide what to say and do,

and help you complete the challenge.

-Good luck.

-Thanks. Remote controllers, are you ready?

-Yes.

Let's do this, OK? We're going to wait here for him.

The main challenge for the next 15 minutes is to persuade the salesman

to boogie his way through his sales pitch.

As always, tricky tasks will be popping up on the screen

to make our remote controllers' job even harder.

This may be a tough challenge.

Will John and Edward be able to pull this off?

-Are you ready for the next challenge?

-Yes.

Let's wait for the doorbell and then we'll begin.

Stop.

DOORBELL RINGS

Here we go.

-Hi, how are you?

-You all right?

-Hey, Sean.

-All right?

-Hi Sean, I'm John, how are you?

OK, the double-glazing salesman has arrived thinking

he's here to sell patio doors.

The remote controllers and Jedward have other ideas.

Say the record company said you could have anything you wanted.

The record company said we could have anything we wanted. It's crazy!

This house cost...it was millions.

-Edward says, I want red, John says...

-Edward, say you want red,

and John say you want blue windows.

Can we get blue windows, can we?

I want red windows.

-Blue looks better.

-Red ones are way better.

-I want blue windows.

-They match our ties.

-They match our ties because I've got blue.

It's my favourite and red's his favourite.

I'm sick of you making all these decisions. I want red windows.

-I'll be back in a tick.

-Such a baby.

Crikey, this looks so convincing!

I hope they don't bicker like this at home.

-You want solid, them windows?

-Have you calmed down now?

Have you calmed down, John?

Yes, we weren't having a fight.

Give him a big hug and make up.

Come here.

Ah, bless.

Well done, they're three minutes into the task

and the salesman, busy measuring up, is blissfully unaware

that John and Edward are being remote controlled.

-Time to hit the dance floor.

-Make him do Riverdance.

-Can you do Riverdance?

-I can't.

-Come on, try it.

This won't be easy.

OK, so...

It's meant to be Riverdance, not tap dance!

Tell him to try harder.

Try harder.

I'm not a dancer, I'm a window salesmen.

You need to try harder. Come on, let's do this.

He's managed to sidestep the Irish jig but the remote controllers

-have to keep this dance session going.

-He must breakdance with you.

-Can you breakdance?

-No.

-What dance moves do you have?

-I make glass and stuff like...

-Do your dance moves.

I ain't got no dance. I'm not a dancer.

I don't want the windows, then, if you don't want to dance.

We don't want the windows, if you're not going to dance with us.

Show us a dance move, we'll think about buying the windows.

Nice one, Chi. He's got to join in now!

Come on, now, try your best, OK?

Good luck, John.

Do it, do it, go.

Do it.

Come on, a bit more enthusiastic.

Jedward are loving it but the salesman isn't too keen.

Come on, a bit more enthusiastic.

With four minutes remaining,

can they convince him to try some new moves?

It's ballet time.

Edward, it's ballet time. Are you ready?

We do it around about this time every day.

We do ballet in here every single day.

-Can you try it?

-No.

Come on, try it with us, OK?

-Are you ready?

-What do you want me to try?

I want you to put your hands in the air.

Sing, "Stop, ballet time".

All right, stop, it's ballet time. Jedward's here to do some ballet.

He's joining in!

Amazing!

Ballet, baby. Ballet.

Wait, we need to do some pleating. We need to do this.

He seems to be going along with all this dancing,

but how long can they keep it up?

OK, I wanted to dance like this.

Ready? Go like this. Ready?

One, two, three, look.

They've had this double-glazing salesman

going for nearly 15 minutes.

Well done, John and Edward. It's time to reveal the joke.

Do you think the windows would look good in a hidden TV show?

Do you think these windows would look good,

look good in a hidden camera show?

Sean, top man. Come over here. Sean.

Have a look in there, give it a wave.

There's one over there as well, there's one in the corner up there.

I learnt so much about windows from you,

-I knew nothing about windows.

-You can get blue ones.

Red one's a bit difficult.

I actually know now, I'm going to get red windows.

-Sean, it's been a pleasure.

-You have been a star.

I think Jedward were good.

Yes, they were like, they were very good,

-they didn't do that much freestyle.

-Much better in that challenge.

-At least we got through to challenge three.

-We got it through.

-Well done, guys!

-Nice one, G...

-C...

-M!

It's great that all these stars agreed to be remote controlled

-through tricky situations on our show.

-But to make things fair,

we had a go at it ourselves. This is JK and Joel, remote controlled.

This is the part of the show where we're told exactly

what to do by remote controlled text message.

We never know what's coming our way,

but we have promised to obey every single order, no matter how awful.

Just waiting for that text.

There it is.

It reads...

-Good luck.

-Good luck.

JK's first, do a pig.

Excuse me, love, I'm looking for a toy.

if there's a toy shop around here? I've got to find this toy,

a piggy-bank. It goes...

Do you know any football scores from today?

I'm trying to get me football results on here.

Can't, it doesn't work. Moo.

What noise does a pig make? It's sort of like...

SNORTS

Really like... Really sort of a big one.

See, it's just not moo-ving.

There's one which is a dinosaur, it goes RAAR!

I'm looking for a card with a chicken.

CLUCKS

I need to buy a monkey, one that goes...

I've got to get dog food, because the dog's at home going...

There's a shop up here, they sell dogs.

Do they have elephants that go...

Because you know they've big ears and a big trunk and they go...

definitely sure it's in Africa?

Because it goes woof, woof, woof!

-It shouldn't go woof, woof, woof.

-That's a good point.

She's not wrong, that impersonation was rubbish!

I definitely win that challenge, hands down.

We're back at the celebrity house with our remote controllers

Callum, Graeme and Chi. They're ready to instruct Jedward

through their final challenge.

Jedward are positioned in the sitting room

for their third and final challenge.

-Are you ready?

-Yes!

Let's get our headphones on, put the lights down.

-John and Edward, it's JK. Can you hear me?

-Hey, JK, we can hear you.

-Are you ready for your third and final challenge?

-Yes!

We've invited a stylist round to see you,

and they're coming over to give you a makeover.

But you have to slowly reveal that you're releasing a new song called

Old MacJedward Had a Farm.

Then you've got to get the stylist to pretend to be an animal.

-Is that clear?

-Yes.

-Wait for your orders from the remote controllers.

We're listening out for the doorbell. Get prepared.

-OK, JK.

-Here we go.

They have 15 minutes to convince the stylist that acting like an animal

is the best idea ever. Good luck.

As always, tricky tasks will be popping on the screen

to make our remote controllers' job even harder.

DOORBELL RINGS

-Hello.

-Hello, how are you?

-Nice to meet you.

Bring it in, bring it in.

Nice to meet you. Sorry if I'm cold.

-What's your name?

-Simone.

All right, we have a brand new single coming out.

We're so excited. It's called Old MacJedward Had A Farm.

Our hair's endangered cos everyone touches it.

If we lose our hair, we'll use this quiff.

OK, so now the formalities are out of the way,

let's get on with our first task.

Get her to wear a Jedward wig.

You know, right now, I think because we both have quiffs,

you should have a quiff as well. Just to set the atmosphere.

I've got a big head, you know.

There we go.

You're like our model as well.

The big question is, how stylish will the stylist's animal sounds be?

Make animal sounds with her.

So, have you ever been on a farm before?

-Been on a farm?

-Yes, do you know what a cow sounds like?

-HE MOOS

-Or like a sheep, like...

-HE BAAS OK, yeah.

-Do you want to help us?

Try the grey ones on.

-Try it on, see what it's like.

-I've worn this before.

Make chicken noises.

You guys are unique so you just do your own thing, don't you?

HE CLUCKS

She only came to pick out clothes.

What must she think of this animal behaviour?

-John, she came to give us advice.

-Try on the chicken outfit.

I was thinking we're up against Lady Gaga so we need to...

-She's already done the meat dress.

-Chicken suit's not really a trend.

-Do you want me to help you?

-Yeah.

Can you make a chicken noise?

-Can

-I

-make a chicken noise? HE CLUCKS

Ready? I can't hear you, what?

Do it. Go...

THEY CLUCK

Jedward are doing well.

She has a wig on, and she's making the right noises.

Can they persuade this top stylist to try a new look?

Get her to dress up like a chicken and sing Old MacJedward Had A Farm.

You know what I think we should do, you can have that outfit,

you can have the sheep outfit. We're going to make sheep noises.

Oh, I can have an outfit?

-Try the outfit on.

-They'll never get her to wear that...will they?

Try it out, I want to see what it looks like.

Everybody's got to get on the same page, just to get in the mood.

Just to get in the mood, OK? Just so me and John aren't...

OK, OK.

Ah, she's putting it on! Brilliant work!

Do a cow noise really, really loud.

LOUD MOO

Do I really have to make the noises?

Edward, chase your tail.

I want to get my tail, I want to get my tail, I want to get my tail.

Great remote controlling!

You put these gloves on.

Everyone make their animal noises.

We're all going to make our animal noise, OK?

-I'm a chicken, so I'm going to go...

-CLUCKS

-Your noise, Edward.

-Oink, oink!

After you've done it, all sing Old MacJedward Had A Farm.

-And your noise is?

-Mine is a sheep.

-Make a sheep noise.

Baa.

-I don't get it.

-Go on, make it.

HE BAAS

SHE BAAS

This stylist can't stop giggling.

Let's hope she's not on to them or she really will have the last laugh.

Very cool, a pig/sheep.

They've got her wearing the pig's nose - they've gone the whole hog!

Do you want to be our stylist for life?

Will you style us for the rest of our life?

Well, yeah, of course, that'd be fantastic.

You now need to sing your song.

Let's all sing, ready?

-What do I need to do?

-Here we go, ready?

In the light, it's really cool. Ready?

# Old MacJedward had a farm, EIEIO

# And on that farm he had a sheep EIEIO

# With a baa-baa here and a baa-baa there

# Baa-baa, baa-baa Everywhere a baa-baa

# Old MacJedward had a farm EIEIO

-# And on that farm... #

-Nice!

They only need a couple more ideas to waste a bit more time.

Louis Walsh is coming to watch it in ten minutes.

Louis Walsh is coming over here now.

Sharon and Louis are coming over.

-You can stay in that outfit.

-I can stay in this outfit?

One of us has to be in this outfit, and you need to wear an outfit.

Why?

Say you're the new stylist director.

You're the new stylist director.

-We need to introduce them to you.

-OK, so can I get changed?

Just seconds to go, come on, Jedward, keep it up a bit longer.

Would you wear something like this on television?

-Would you wear something like that on television?

-No.

And time's up. Let's let the cat out of the bag

and end this animal crackers challenge. Go, go, go.

Would you wear it on a camera show?

-I wouldn't wear it ever.

-You are on a hidden camera show! Agh!

-How are you, Simone?

-I'm all right.

You can't breathe, let's get it on properly.

There you go.

Let's take it off.

-We love the Jedward quiff.

-Thanks.

-You look amazing.

-Thank you.

It's been so long since we actually realised what you look like

when you originally came in here. Oh, there she is!

Hold my hand.

And I'll just press there.

-Away you go.

-Sit down!

-Sit down.

We've got it, we've got it! Boys, pull. Come on.

-Get it off her.

-Yes!

The most exciting part of that challenge would have been

where they were all dressed up in their costumes.

# With a baa-baa here and a baa-baa there

# Baa-baa, baa-baa Everywhere a baa-baa... #

I think the most exciting part was

when Edward put on the pig outfit, "I need my tail, I need my tail".

I want to get my tail, I want to get my tail!

-Running around chasing his tail.

-It was really exciting.

-That was the best challenge, I think we all agree.

-They were amazing.

-Fantastic, we had so much fun.

-Ladies and gentlemen, Jedward!

Thanks, guys.

-The remote controllers.

-The remote controllers!

Remote controllers, first of all, Graeme,

-what was your favourite part?

-My favourite part

was when the handyman came

and John and Edward raced him and he fell over.

-That was very funny. Chi.

-My favourite part

was when Edward ate the instructions.

They didn't taste good.

We've got something to say thank you because you've been brilliant.

I have the Remote Control Star baseball hat.

Stick those on, stick those on.

-I want one.

-And look at these,

exclusive hoodies as well for you, boys.

-Wear those with pride.

-Final round of applause.

Well done, everyone.

And that is it for today.

Until next time when we put another star

together with three more remote controllers, here on...

ALL: Remote Control Star!