Kay Purcell Remote Control Star


Kay Purcell

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Transcript


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-Have you ever wanted to control a celebrity?

-Make your wish their command?

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This is the show where three mates take charge of a star for the day,

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controlling them through funny situations like these.

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Shout, "Show me the money!" as loud as you can.

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Show me the money!

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You've got to accidentally spill cereal all over the place.

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Oh, dear.

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Squirt it at him.

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HE YELLS AND CACKLES

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-Now be a duck.

-Quack! Quack!

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All the action takes place in our celebrity house.

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It's rigged from top to bottom with hidden cameras and microphones.

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And our Remote Controllers will be based here...

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..in this hi-tech control room, giving their star instructions

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via a secret earpiece.

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It's time to remote-control another star.

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CHEERING, CAMERAS CLICK

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Let's meet today's Remote Controllers.

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Hey. I'm Ethan.

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I'm the brains of the group and I can really think outside the box.

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Ethan probably comes up with the best ideas cos he's brainiest.

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So he can think of lots of strategies.

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Hi, I'm Jamie. And I'm pretty random. Schmur!

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Jamie's just really good at making people laugh.

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He comes up with loads of funny ideas.

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Hey, I'm Scott. I'm the prankster of the group.

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In lessons, sometimes, he'll shout out a random word, like, "Book!"

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So, Remote Control Star, you'd better watch out.

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We've met our Remote Controllers. Now it's time to meet today's star.

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Thing is, I'm a little bit worried.

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-Why?

-Because today's star is quite scary and she's a tough nut.

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OK, whisper it. Who is it?

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She's not really like that. That's just her character in Tracy Beaker.

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Oops. There's a clue.

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Today's star is known from Emmerdale, Waterloo Road

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and she plays Gina Conway in Tracy Beaker Returns.

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It's the actress Kay Purcell!

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CONTROLLERS CHEER

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Hello!

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Hello. How's it going, Kay?

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It's going good, man.

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"How's it going, Kay?" What's your first impression of our Remote Controllers?

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They look beautiful people, kind, caring.

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-You wouldn't do anything horrible to me, would you?

-That's what you'd like to think.

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That sounds scary.

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Trouble. There's trouble.

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So, Kay, do you promise to obey all orders from our Remote Controllers,

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no matter how tricky they are?

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-I do.

-Brilliant. Kay, this is your sneaky Remote Control Star earpiece.

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You need to hide that and get off for challenge one. Are you ready?

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-You go that way. Remote Controllers, are you ready?

-Yeah!

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Let's go for it, come on!

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So, Kay's in the sitting room. Four cameras are covering her every move.

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She should be able to hear us via these microphones here.

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Guys, put your headphones on.

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-It's JK here, can you hear me?

-Yeah.

-OK, it's time to reveal

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-what we've got in store.

-OK.

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Being a top actor, I'm sure that you like to unwind like all the luvvies?

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-Oh, yes, darling.

-So, what we've done is arranged

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-a yoga session here in the front room for you.

-Ri-ight.

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-Well, yoga classes are normally relaxing, yeah?

-Yeah.

-Not today.

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-OK.

-The yoga instructor is going to have

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-the weirdest, strangest yoga class she's ever had in her life.

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-Right.

-You have

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-15 minutes from when the class starts to make it...just weird.

-OK.

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'The challenge is for Kay to be 100% weird for an entire 15 minutes.

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'As ever, tasks will pop up on this screen.

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'Will the Remote Controllers be able to get Kay to do them?'

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OK, we're just waiting for the doorbell now. Everyone poised?

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Let's do this.

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'Cameras are rigged, Kay's in place.

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'Here comes the yoga teacher.'

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DOORBELL Ooh!

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THEY MOUTH

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'Kay's pretend assistant is showing the yoga teacher in.

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'It's time for the Remote Controllers to have some fun.'

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-Hi.

-Hi.

-You all right?

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-I've brought you a yoga mat.

-Oh, right.

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"I like the colour of the mat."

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Do you like the colour?

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-It's nice.

-Yeah. It is. It's a nice colour, though, isn't it?

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'This is all about making the yoga class weird.

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'This task should help.'

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Make the yoga teacher move her mat around the room three times.

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As you said, you've got tight hips.

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-OK. Right, can we try those a bit over there, please?

-Sure,

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which way do you want it?

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Yeah. Oh, what you think?

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You need to feel...

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-Closer to the fireplace.

-Could you bring it closer, please, as well?

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-About here?

-Yeah.

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'That's the second mat move.

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'The yoga teacher must be starting to think

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'Kay is the world's fussiest pupil.'

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Move it to the sofa a bit.

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Oh, right. Yeah. Like you say.

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Maybe if we do that over there?

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Sorry. I'm just...

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So you're facing the garden?

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-Yeah. That's great.

-So you get a bit of air...

-Wicked.

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That's fantastic. Thank you.

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'That's three mat moves.

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'Well played, Remote Controllers.'

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Ask her to move the mat slightly to the right.

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Could you move it slightly to the right, please?

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KAY SIGHS

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-OK?

-Yeah.

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'Five minutes gone and the lesson's getting odd.

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'Time for Kay to really confuse the teacher now.'

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Put the legwarmers on.

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Oh, right. Yeah, I'll put my legwarmers on. Just to...

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Oh, no... In fact, I don't want those on.

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I've got kind of a few pairs because I wasn't sure, you know? Right.

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OK, let's get you started.

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As you're standing, I'll just keep you standing for the moment.

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What we normally do is try and keep our feet grounded.

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Ah... Sorry, I do want them on.

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Yeah. Which do you think? Yellow, pink? Hmm?

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-Er...I'd go for pink.

-Pink? OK.

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Yeah. OK. Pink, pink, pink.

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-We are all different, aren't we?

-Yeah...

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I can't get it on.

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No, forget it again. Forget it.

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OK!

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-Say, "Can you help me put the legwarmers on?"

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You know, this is... Could you help me do them, please?

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-Put them on?

-Yeah. Again, because I just can't bend. Is that all right?

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-That's fine.

-Thanks.

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-Sorry, I've got cold hands.

-I know, darling.

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'It's lucky she does so much yoga,

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'or that teacher could be getting stressed out by now.'

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Yeah. I'm feeling those. Yeah.

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Say you want a yellow one on the other leg.

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Could I have a yellow one on the other one? Because...

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You know what I mean? INSTRUCTOR LAUGHS

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-Really?

-Yeah.

-Say, "Don't laugh at me."

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Why are you laughing at me?

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Don't laugh at me.

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INSTRUCTOR CONTINUES LAUGHING No, honestly.

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SHE LAUGHS

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"Do you think I'm weird?"

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Do you think I'm a bit weird?

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No? All right, OK.

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'She's changed her mind about them so many times I've lost count!'

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Oh, no!

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'Everyone loves a cheeky task.

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'There's a secret remote control fart machine which is

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'activated by this big red button.

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'The Remote Controllers have to choose their moment carefully.

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'Can they pull this off without the yoga teacher sussing them out?'

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Bend your knees, just placing our hands.

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-Good grief. I don't think I'd get in that position.

-It's OK.

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Say that looks a bit scary.

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That really looks scary.

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-For beginners.

-Can I have a go?

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Right, can I just have a go?

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-Of course you can.

-Right.

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OK, so you did...

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-Yeah.

-OK.

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Centre yourself.

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-Feel the connection.

-OK.

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Your hands. Forward from the hips, if you can.

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No, there's no way.

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No, honestly. I'll have to start with something really easy.

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Go on, Gina.

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FARTING NOISE

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Great timing, Remote Controllers!

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-Say sorry.

-Sorry about that.

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Yes, Kay's managed to pass that fake guff as a real one.

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Weird yoga? It certainly was.

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Time to reveal the prank.

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Reveal the remote control.

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This is a hidden camera show.

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-Well done!

-OK.

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Did you not think that was really weird? That you came round and...

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So, there was a moment where you probably heard

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-a rather rude noise?

-Yes.

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FARTING NOISE

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But the great thing is, you can time it perfectly.

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So just have look at that down there.

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FARTING NOISE

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LAUGHTER

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The funniest part, I think, was when she farted.

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When she stretched up and she just let it loose.

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FARTING NOISE

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When we said our first thing and then

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she just did it straight away, we felt in control then.

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-So, did we enjoy it?

-Yeah.

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-More to come, yeah?

-Yeah.

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Remote Controllers, time to get your control heads on again.

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Kay here is at your disposal.

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I think it's time that we threw her in at the deep end once again.

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It doesn't involve a swimming pool, does it?

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No. As it's coming up to lunchtime -

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you've been a legend so far, and a great sport - the next challenge is

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going to be taking place in a cafe.

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-Right...

-Fancy that?

-Uh...

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You haven't got much choice. Let's do it, shall we? Come on.

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Oh, gosh!

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Kay, it's Joel here. Can you hear me?

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-Yeah.

-Right, you've got to go to that cafe and order a meal.

-Yeah.

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As the waiter brings it over, change your order

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for something completely different

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-that the Remote Controllers will think of.

-Right.

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-Is it going to be tricky?

-Yeah.

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Kay's challenge is to become the world's most awkward cafe customer

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and keep it up for 15 minutes.

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The Remote Controllers are watching from inside the van,

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and tricky tasks will pop up on the screen while they boss

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Kay through her secret earpiece.

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We've rigged secret cameras up in the cafe, and here comes Kay.

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-Sit on the chair in the corner.

-OK.

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-Hi.

-You all right?

-Yeah.

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-Just for one?

-Yeah, please.

-Down here all right?

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-That's fantastic.

-I hope you're enjoying the weather.

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It's great, isn't it?

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All right, lovely. Thanks.

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Kay's cosy in her seat. But now,

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Ethan, Jamie and Scott are about to make things really

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uncomfortable for her.

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Start singing to yourself, quietly.

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SHE HUMS

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# Doo doo doo, doo doo doo... #

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-Nice singing!

-Ha!

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Right, we know that Kay can sing now.

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It's task time.

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-There you go.

-Brilliant.

-Are you here for something to eat today?

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Yeah. Thanks. Lovely, thanks.

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We do have some specials.

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-I just noticed that.

-Ask if they have an omelette.

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..Smoked salmon sandwich.

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-Right. Sorry, do you have omelettes?

-We don't have omelettes,

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-we've got scrambled eggs.

-That'll do.

-That'll do.

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-There you go.

-Thanks a lot. Cheers.

-No worries.

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Say, "You're such a handsome man".

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You're actually quite a nice-looking guy, aren't you?

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You're really handsome.

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-That's very kind.

-All right.

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-"Just my type." Say, "Just my type."

-Ahh...No!

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LAUGHTER

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That was ultra embarrassing. But get ready for worse.

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Here comes those scrambled eggs.

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-Cheers.

-All right for you?

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Do you want any sauces at all, lemon?

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Shout out that the doctor said

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you're not allowed to have eggs, cos you're allergic to them.

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Oh, just remembered, can't have eggs.

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You can't have eggs? That's probably not the dish for you, then.

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Kay looks really shamed.

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Will the remote controllers be able to get her to send back

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any more dishes?

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All right, all right, um...

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Ask for smoked salmon.

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I'll just do the... I'll do the smoked salmon.

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-Sandwich, yeah?

-Yeah. Will you please...

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Well, it's the egg. It looks amazing.

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-It's all right, I mean. You know...

-I'll find somebody who wants it.

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JK, I'm hungry here,

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looks like there's going to be loads of spare food going!

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Say bye.

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Bye.

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That was funny.

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There you go.

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-Sorry about the wait.

-No, thank you.

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-Thanks.

-Are you OK? Do you want some more water at all?

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Say that you don't like that kind of fish,

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say you only like fish from Japan.

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Er...oh.

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-Is this Japanese?

-Is what Japanese?

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-The salmon.

-I don't think so.

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I'm not sure. I think we get it from a local supplier.

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Say you don't like local, and you only like Japanese fish.

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-Do you like Japanese salmon?

-Well...

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-I don't know. It might not be, unfortunately.

-Really?

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Ask him if he has some soup.

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What soup is there at all?

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Soups, we've got a puy lentil and bacon soup.

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Say, yeah, you'll give that a go.

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Yeah, I'll give it a go.

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-Puy lentil and bacon?

-Yeah.

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-And do you want me to leave you with the salmon?

-Oh, yeah, well...

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Nah, take it away.

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No, no.

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That's brilliant. Thanks very much.

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You're doing really, really good.

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She has done really well!

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Just one minute to go.

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So, here's another task.

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Watch out, Remote Controllers, things are going to get spicy.

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OK, thanks.

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Tell him to put lots and lots and lots and lots of pepper on.

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Do you mind putting some pepper on for me, please, is that all right?

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-Lots. Say lots and lots.

-Can I have lots, please?

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-OK.

-Lots and lots.

-Are you sure now?

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A bit more.

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-It'll blow your head off.

-More.

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-Keep going?

-Yeah, please.

-Say, "I love pepper".

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I love pepper.

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Keep it going, lads. Not long left.

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Just 30 seconds to go.

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Ask him if...

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if it's white or black pepper.

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Is it white or black pepper that you put on there?

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-That is black pepper.

-Black pepper.

-Say that's disgusting.

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I don't like that.

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-I don't like black pepper.

-Right, OK.

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We've just put quite a lot on there, haven't we?

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Well, you put it on, didn't you?

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-True, yes. You did ask me to, though.

-Time's up!

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Great job, remote controllers.

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Reveal the gag before he throws her out.

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Reveal that you're being remote controlled.

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I've been under remote control.

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I've had people telling me what to do.

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-Well done.

-Fantastic. Brilliant stuff.

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-I feel so sorry for you.

-That's all right.

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Just to let you know, quickly, you've been part of

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a hidden camera children's TV show.

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And as you can tell here, Kay was winding you up something chronic.

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-She was quite a lot.

-What did you think? I used to be a waiter

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when I was younger and I hate these sorts of customers.

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Were you just thinking it's a normal day for you?

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I was waiting to bring the bill across!

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Anyway, congratulations. I'm going to sit down.

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Can I see the menu, please?

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The funniest bit was when she ordered the salmon and then

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the waiter brought it to her and she said, no, I only like Japanese fish.

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Oh, is this Japanese?

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-Is what Japanese?

-The salmon.

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My favourite moment was when he piled on loads and loads of pepper,

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and at the end she finally goes, I don't like pepper. That's funny.

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-I don't like black pepper.

-Right, OK.

0:17:530:17:57

Rock, paper, scissors.

0:18:020:18:04

I'm a cowboy!

0:18:040:18:05

It's great that all these stars have agreed to be remote controlled

0:18:050:18:10

through tricky situations on our show.

0:18:100:18:12

But, to make things fair, JK and I have agreed

0:18:120:18:14

to take a taste of our own medicine.

0:18:140:18:16

This is JK and Joel remote controlled.

0:18:160:18:18

This is the part of the show where

0:18:200:18:22

we're told exactly what to do by remote control text message.

0:18:220:18:25

We never know what's coming next, but we have agreed

0:18:250:18:28

to obey every order, no matter how awful it is.

0:18:280:18:31

-So, waiting for the first text message.

-Anything?

0:18:310:18:34

MESSAGE ALERT

0:18:340:18:35

Right on cue. Here we are.

0:18:350:18:36

Jug of milk, two shakers.

0:18:390:18:41

Right, what next? "This is Manky Milkshake.

0:18:410:18:44

"You each have two minutes to bring back three manky items

0:18:440:18:47

"to flavour each other's milkshake."

0:18:470:18:50

Oh, so each other's? This is going to get messy.

0:18:500:18:53

No, I'm OK. I'm looking for something manky.

0:18:580:19:00

-Are you ready?

-Yes, right.

0:19:010:19:03

Oh, you're going to love this.

0:19:030:19:05

Is it chocolate?

0:19:050:19:07

It's fish, everyone.

0:19:070:19:09

Fish in your shake.

0:19:090:19:11

Fishy, fishy, fishy.

0:19:110:19:13

Goose fat! Oh, look at that.

0:19:130:19:15

Go on, have a smell of that. Go on, it smells like off Sunday dinner.

0:19:150:19:19

Do you like vinegar?

0:19:200:19:22

You do now. There you go, it's a good start, look at that.

0:19:220:19:25

Hate cheese? You do now, don't you?

0:19:250:19:28

Now, how much fish would you like in there?

0:19:280:19:30

-There you go.

-Aww!

0:19:330:19:34

Not all of it!

0:19:340:19:36

-It's like a squid.

-I can smell it from here.

0:19:360:19:39

-PFFRRRT!

-Oh!

0:19:390:19:41

It's got hairs in it.

0:19:410:19:43

Yours looks quite appetising.

0:19:430:19:45

I'm waiting for a message to say it's a joke.

0:19:450:19:48

-MESSAGE ALERT

-Text message.

0:19:480:19:50

-I'll get goose fat on it.

-Don't wipe it on me!

0:19:500:19:52

"Whoever drinks the most is officially the bravest."

0:19:550:20:00

Do you know what?

0:20:050:20:07

Three, two, one, cheers.

0:20:070:20:08

THEY COUGH

0:20:110:20:12

I can't even smell it.

0:20:180:20:20

-You haven't taken any!

-I have.

0:20:200:20:22

Oh! Here we go, three, two, one.

0:20:230:20:25

Lovely, that.

0:20:350:20:36

-Have you just finished that?

-Yes.

0:20:380:20:41

How did you do that?

0:20:410:20:43

Just... it's all about mind over matter, JK.

0:20:430:20:46

-You are such a brave little soldier.

-Go on, say it, who's the bravest?

0:20:460:20:50

-You're the bravest.

-I am the bravest.

0:20:500:20:52

That was the most disgusting drink I've ever tasted.

0:20:520:20:57

It couldn't be worse next time. Could it?

0:20:570:21:00

We're back with our Remote Controllers

0:21:060:21:08

-Ethan, Scott and Jamie. So, are you ready for the final challenge?

-Yes.

0:21:080:21:12

Kay is in the kitchen and, believe me,

0:21:120:21:14

she's ready for this challenge and it's going to get extremely messy.

0:21:140:21:19

-Kay, its JK

-. Hi.

0:21:200:21:22

-Are you ready for your final challenge?

-Yes.

0:21:220:21:25

-OK, can I ask you a question?

-Go on.

-Do you like slapstick comedy?

0:21:250:21:29

Um...yes.

0:21:290:21:32

-Good.

-Oh, gosh.

0:21:320:21:33

-Kay, it's Joel here. I've got one of my special treats for you.

-Great.

0:21:330:21:38

In a few minutes, a children's entertainer is going to arrive

0:21:380:21:41

whose name is Jimbo.

0:21:410:21:43

And this is the story. He's coming round to the house

0:21:430:21:46

-to discuss a booking for your kid's party.

-Right.

0:21:460:21:49

But you've got a secret challenge.

0:21:490:21:51

You must get him to let you do lots of silly pranks on him.

0:21:510:21:54

-It'll get messy.

-OK.

0:21:540:21:55

And don't worry because the Remote Controllers

0:21:550:21:58

will tell you what to say and what to do.

0:21:580:22:00

What possibly could go wrong?

0:22:000:22:03

-Oh, gosh!

-So listen out for the doorbell.

-OK.

0:22:030:22:07

-And Jimbo will be here in a second. Good luck, Kay.

-Thank you.

0:22:070:22:10

Can't wait to see Kay's pranks!

0:22:140:22:15

As ever, some extra tricky tasks will pop up on this screen

0:22:150:22:19

for the Remote Controllers to get Kay to carry out.

0:22:190:22:22

Here we go, Kay's ready and here's Jimbo the entertainer.

0:22:240:22:27

Fingers crossed for some serious fun.

0:22:270:22:31

-Hi.

-How are you doing, OK? Really good.

-How are you?

0:22:310:22:35

Yeah, all right.

0:22:350:22:37

-Would you like a seat?

-So, what is it you want me to do

0:22:370:22:41

-because we don't usually... Is this to discuss your child's party?

-Yes.

0:22:410:22:45

It's a two-fold thing, really. It's the child's birthday party.

0:22:450:22:49

I need to know a little bit about

0:22:490:22:51

-slapstick and stuff.

-Ok, cool, cool, cool.

0:22:510:22:54

Kay's going to need bottle for this and some water, too.

0:22:540:23:00

I've got some things and I'm just wondering

0:23:000:23:02

if you don't mind having a look.

0:23:020:23:05

Just to see what do you think.

0:23:050:23:07

Right, so, say this, say if I was going to do this...

0:23:080:23:12

Squirt it at him.

0:23:140:23:16

If I kind of wanted to do it, what would you kind of do?

0:23:160:23:20

How would you build up to that?

0:23:200:23:22

Well, I wouldn't do stuff like that.

0:23:220:23:24

What's wrong with that?

0:23:240:23:26

It's a bit boring and old school.

0:23:260:23:28

Say "How do you know it's boring if you haven't tried it?"

0:23:280:23:31

But how do you know it's boring? Have you tried it?

0:23:310:23:34

I do use pistols but I use big Super Soakers.

0:23:340:23:39

Right, if I sprayed it,

0:23:390:23:42

would you show me what kind of face you do, is that all right?

0:23:420:23:46

-You cool?

-Give it a go.

0:23:460:23:48

Argh! Ha-ha-ha-ha!

0:23:480:23:51

That's amazing.

0:23:520:23:54

For someone who's come for a meeting, Jimbo was up for a soaking.

0:23:540:23:57

What a sport!

0:23:570:23:59

How will she get him to fall for the oldest trick in the prank book?

0:23:590:24:03

Get him to sit on a whoopee cushion.

0:24:030:24:06

And you know these, are these...

0:24:060:24:09

PFFRRRTT! I know that makes a...

0:24:090:24:11

How do you make that funny?

0:24:110:24:12

How do you make it funny? You know?

0:24:120:24:16

Ummm...I'd put...

0:24:160:24:19

I would use it with a microphone, put it on a chair like that.

0:24:200:24:23

Show me.

0:24:230:24:25

-It's hard to do at a kids' party.

-Yeah.

0:24:250:24:28

I'd just... I'd probably go...

0:24:280:24:30

I'll just...

0:24:320:24:34

HE SCREAMS AND LAUGHS

0:24:340:24:36

It's seriously windy in that kitchen.

0:24:410:24:44

Time to get seriously messy.

0:24:440:24:47

Make an excuse to cream pie him.

0:24:470:24:51

Right, so then... Hold on.

0:24:510:24:54

On its own it wouldn't be fun, but like if it's a character,

0:24:540:24:57

that's a little bit...

0:24:570:24:59

Say, "Do you like cream pies?"

0:24:590:25:01

Um, yes, I wanted to do the cream pie gag.

0:25:010:25:04

-Yes.

-Right, so...

0:25:040:25:07

so what would you do?

0:25:070:25:09

-How much would you do?

-I'd go to town.

0:25:090:25:13

Get loads and loads and loads and loads.

0:25:130:25:16

Right, so, if I was doing it, how would I throw it?

0:25:180:25:22

I don't want to throw it,

0:25:220:25:23

but how would I? Hold on, do you want put that around you and then I go...

0:25:230:25:27

-No.

-Are you sure?

0:25:270:25:29

-So feed me.

-I love that. I love it.

0:25:290:25:32

Trip, trip, trip.

0:25:320:25:34

Pretend to trip.

0:25:340:25:36

Cos I want the kids to be able to do this kind of stuff.

0:25:360:25:42

And if I did that... so shall I pretend to trip?

0:25:420:25:47

Actually do it.

0:25:470:25:49

Yes, actually go for it.

0:25:490:25:51

Awesome! I've never seen a remote control cream pie before.

0:25:510:25:56

They've done it! Time to reveal that we've been clowning around.

0:25:570:26:01

Reveal that you're remote controlled.

0:26:010:26:03

I actually didn't think you'd let me do it

0:26:030:26:05

because this is a children's... hidden camera show.

0:26:050:26:13

-What?

-Surprise!

0:26:130:26:14

You can stay sitting down if you want.

0:26:210:26:23

I thought it was going to be a boring meeting.

0:26:270:26:30

I just couldn't believe...

0:26:300:26:32

but also what you did is...

0:26:320:26:34

Oh come here, give me a cuddle.

0:26:340:26:36

The most exciting part for me was probably when

0:26:400:26:44

Kay squirted Jimbo with the flower,

0:26:440:26:47

and the water went all over him, and then he just over-reacted.

0:26:470:26:50

Argh! Ha-ha-ha-ha!

0:26:500:26:53

-He was awesome.

-Great, amazing.

0:26:530:26:56

The best thing ever.

0:26:560:26:58

THEY CHEER

0:27:020:27:04

I'm sure we will all agree, has Kay been a star? Big round of applause.

0:27:060:27:10

-How was it for you, though?

-Oh, fantastic. Really, really good.

0:27:100:27:14

Really? How was Jimbo?

0:27:140:27:16

Wild. Wasn't it wild?

0:27:160:27:20

Kay, do you think the Remote Controllers were fair today?

0:27:200:27:23

Yes. Sometimes it was like you asked me something when we were in the cafe

0:27:230:27:27

and I was like, "I'm not doing that. I'm not doing it."

0:27:270:27:29

But, on the whole, you were really fair.

0:27:290:27:31

Listen, guys, we have these for you,

0:27:310:27:33

exclusive Remote Control Star baseball hats

0:27:330:27:36

and some lovely, lovely, lovely hoodies for you as well

0:27:360:27:39

so you can wear those with pride.

0:27:390:27:41

So that's it from us until next time when we put a star

0:27:410:27:43

with more Remote Controllers here on...

0:27:430:27:45

ALL: Remote Control Star!

0:27:450:27:48

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:28:050:28:08

E-mail [email protected]

0:28:080:28:11

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