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Charlotte v Harriette The Dog Ate My Homework

Charlotte v Harriette

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Transcript

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AAARRRRRGH!

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THEY BABBLE

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Hello! I'm Iain Stirling and welcome to The Dog Ate My Homework.

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If this is a swimming pool of comedy,

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then stick on some armbands and jump right in.

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Although, like any swimming pool, I will know if you've had an accident.

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Well, Smash will.

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Sam, I told you to go before we started.

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CROWD LAUGHS

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HE SNORTS

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Let's take the register. On my right,

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a girl whose teacher said they could do a project on any time in history.

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Naturally, she chose lunchtime.

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It's Charlotte, everybody!

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-Here, sir!

-Yes.

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APPLAUSE

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And on Charlotte's team, the cutest guy with great big dimples.

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He's never had a pimple, although he is quite simple.

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From Big Friday Wind-Up, it's Sam Nixon!

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Here, sir.

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APPLAUSE

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Also on Charlotte's team, a comedian who, sadly,

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I didn't have a rhyme about.

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Only joking, Of course I do!

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I, like Len Goodman, am a master of rhymes.

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So make a kerfuffle, she loves a truffle,

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it's Suzi Ruffell!

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Here, Sir!

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APPLAUSE

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Imagine if she'd worn a duffel - would've been amazing.

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And on my left,

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a girl who's been practising for her music exams on the maracas.

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Apparently, she's still a bit shaky. He-he-he-he!

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You're welcome. It's Harriette!

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Here, Sir!

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APPLAUSE

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On Harriette's team,

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a comedian who gives people jokes for their birthday,

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although if I was you, I would keep the receipts.

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It's Ray Bradshaw!

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Here, sir!

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APPLAUSE

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Also on Harriette's team, another presenter, and, yes,

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our Mark here is an actual model.

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The real Mark's a lot bigger.

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It's Mark Rhodes!

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Here, sir.

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APPLAUSE

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Ladies and gentlemen, can we have applause for today's teams!

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APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

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So what's with all the people behind the desks, Iain?

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I'm glad you asked.

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Well, as usual, our teams will be locked in a brain battle

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to win these - my delectable golden stars.

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CROWD: OOOOOOH!

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Along the way, I'll award bonus stars

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to anyone who puts an extra big smile on my face.

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But be warned! Any cheek

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and I can make them go away using this foul-smelling spray.

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What? What?

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Hee-hee-hee.

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-That's actually quite nice.

-Well...

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Sorry, this is a... This is a foul-smelling spray!

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CROWD LAUGHS

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ERGH! OH!

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It smells of Yorkshire Tea and brass bands!

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You're welcome.

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But don't turn your nose up at me,

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because it's Iain's school so it's...

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CROWD: IAIN'S RULES!

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# I've got a catchphrase! #

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The teams with the most stars at the end of the show will be our winners,

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while the losers face detention with a man so scary,

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even his baby photos have an 18 certificate.

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It's Mr Smash.

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CROWD: BOOOOO!

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You've been tending some sheep, I believe.

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Oh, mate, you've not done a Little Bo Peep

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and lost your sheep, have you?

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HE SOBS

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Mate, listen, maybe the dog's got one of those sheep collars

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you can borrow.

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-Ruff? Rargh, ha-ha-ha!

-There you go.

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Give it a blow!

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QUACK! QUACK!

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Argh!

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Try again.

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QUACK! QUACK!

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Argh, blargh!

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Hey, give it a bit of gusto!

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BAAAA!

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HEE-HEE-HEE!

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CROWD LAUGHS

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A sheep landed on his head!

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OK, guys, let's get on with the sho-o-o-o-ow!

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APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

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General knowledge now, and Watch Your Mouth.

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-ANNOUNCER:

-Watch Your Mouth!

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This is where our teams have to talk

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whilst they have one of these stuck in their mush.

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It is...

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..a Mr Smash growl-maker.

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Please insert your growl-makers now.

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Get them right in there.

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Ray, how are you? All right?

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I-I'm good, thank you.

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How's it like being on the show for the first time?

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-HE MUFFLES:

-Er, yerry dyayning.

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What?

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Yerry dyayning.

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-Sorry?

-It's good.

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Ah.

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CROWD LAUGHS

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Charlotte, Harriette, the twins, how yous doing?

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Anazing.

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You can do it!

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I know I can!

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-THEY MUFFLE:

-Sho can you!

-Sho can you!

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First question. What do you call a social group of lions?

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-BUZZER:

-Harriette.

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-HE MUFFLES:

-Uh hryde.

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A hryde!

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HA-HA-HA!

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A hryde of lions!

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CROWD LAUGHS

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A hryde of lions, darleng!

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HA-HA-HA!

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-ANNOUNCER:

-SCHOOOOOL DISCOOOOO!

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Go, go, go!

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# Don't you worry, don't you worry, child

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# See heaven's got a plan for you

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# Don't you worry, don't you worry, child

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# See heaven's got a plan for you

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# Don't you worry, don't you worry, child

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# See heaven's got a plan for you

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# Don't you worry, don't you worry, child... #

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RECORD SCRATCHES

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One last time?

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-A hryde of lions!

-A pride!

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For an extra bonus point,

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can your entire team please roar like lions?

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-ROAR!

-RARRRGH!

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Hargh?

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That's a lion that roared too loud and a little trump came out.

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Raar...

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Oooh.

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OK, next one, fingers on your buzzers.

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In Harry Potter, what is a term for someone who is not magical?

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-BUZZER:

-Charlotte!

-Yes, Charlotte.

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Uh huggle.

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A muggle's correct.

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Name three other characters from the series, Suzi,

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-and you can't have Ron, Harry or Hermione.

-Mm...

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Hrofessor McGonagall.

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Yeah.

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Dumdledore.

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-Yeah.

-And...

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..Rhisses Weasley.

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Mrs Weasley, very well done.

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OK, fingers on buzzers.

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What is the name of the iconic monument

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gifted by France to the US, which stands in...

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-BUZZER:

-Harriette!

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Stattuh Uh Liherty.

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HA-HA-HA!

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Hehhy teysee.

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Glad you've done that?

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Narh.

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Bonus point, can you sing the American National Anthem?

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# Hoh shay cah you hee

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# Arh the darn's early light

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Uh..

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WAILING AND TUNELESS SINGING

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Ahhh!

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No, I can't.

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Fingers on buzzers.

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What is the name of the traditional Australian object

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which is designed to come back when...

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-BUZZER:

-Charlotte!

-Yes, Suzi.

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-A...

-Hm?

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A hrrang

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What?

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Hoorerang.

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-It's like...

-A hoorerang!

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-You can't...

-Oh, boomerang! Yep, that's correct.

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For a bonus point, can you name the capital of Australia?

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-Canberra.

-Yeah!

-Woo!

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People normally say Sydney, but it isnae.

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Hah, good! Good.

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Fingers on buzzers.

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Salt and vinegar, cheese and onion,

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ready salted are all popular flavours of...

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-BUZZER:

-Harriette!

-Yes.

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-Crists.

-Yes.

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-That's correct, and welcome to the show, Ray.

-Oh, no!

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For a bonus point, can you eat some crisps?

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Woohoo!

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THEY CHANT: Ray! Ray! Ray!

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Yay!

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THEY ALL LAUGH

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Go on, Ray!

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-That is disgusting.

-Yeah.

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Easy!

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You've got it on your...

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-Weyy!

-Ha-ha-ha!

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Fingers on buzzers.

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What kind of food does a herbivore eat?

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-BUZZER:

-Charlotte!

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Hedgedehuls.

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THEY LAUGH

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OK. Name three types of green vegetable.

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-Ruccoli...

-Yeah.

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..asharagus

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and green reans.

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-Green reans?

-Gleen reans.

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Lean...

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-Green...

-Green?

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-..yeans.

-Yeans.

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Like runner reans!

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Green beans!

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-Yeah, that was good!

-There, you said... Say it again?

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-Deans!

-Deans?!

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I can't give you the point, I'm afraid.

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-Ahh!

-Ahh!

-Ahh!

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Sorry, it's green beans. That's what I was looking for.

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That's rot I rere saying!

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Fingers on buzzers. What ferocious carnivorous dinosaur

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is famous for having a big head and tiny little arms?

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-BUZZER:

-Harriette!

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Tyrannosaurus Yex.

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Yes, correct.

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For a bonus point. This is a big one.

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Your best Tyrannosaurus Rex impressions.

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RAAAARGH!

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RAAAR!

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Oh, no, there's not...

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Hrrrr!

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THEY ALL LAUGH

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-Hoooo!

-Woooo!

-Wooo-oooh!

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Actually, Tyrranosaurus Rex in real life are very friendly creatures.

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They only got angry because they could never itch their belly.

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HE WHIMPERS

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BELL RINGS Oh, time up!

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And at the end of that round, I can reveal the gold star goes to...

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-..Harriette's team!

-Wheyy!

-Yeah!

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APPLAUSE

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It's time now for Pie the Supply.

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-ANNOUNCER:

-Pie the Supply!

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Over yonder are four people all claiming to be real teachers

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but only one is telling the truth.

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Yeah, talk out of your face and get a pie i-in your face.

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And if both teams fail to identify the real teacher,

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then there will be a penalty!

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CROWD: OOOOOH!

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You've been warned.

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And today, our teachers are all of the mathematical variety.

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We have got teacher one, Mr Allen.

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Teacher two, Mr Duku.

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Teacher three, Miss McKay.

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Teacher four, Mr Bradley.

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OK, so, Charlotte's team, just first impressions,

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have a look, which one says "maths teacher" to you? Math-y.

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Number one.

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One? Why?

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-Just looks a bit math-y.

-Math-y.

-Yeah.

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Yeah? You think number one. Charlotte, what do you think?

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You're still at school.

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Yeah, I think number one just because he looks like

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he's trying to hide the fact

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that he is a supply teacher, so...

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-Sneaky.

-Yeah.

-He's trying to hide the fact?

0:11:440:11:46

-Yeah.

-Sam?

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Number one actually looks a little bit like a maths teacher that I had,

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Mr Patrick.

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That's cheating if that's Mr Patrick.

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That's completely out of order.

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But I don't know, there's part of me thinking number three.

0:11:570:11:59

-Don't know why, just am.

-Yeah.

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OK. Harriette's team, one, two, three or four?

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Just first impressions,

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what's the first thing what pops into your mind?

0:12:040:12:06

I'm going for number three and four.

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-You think three or four?

-Yeah.

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I think four's got the shoes on of a man who spends a lot of time

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standing at whiteboards...

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-Excellent.

-..doing maths.

0:12:150:12:16

Number one doesn't look like he teaches maths, he teaches fashion,

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-because that dickie bow is rocking.

-Yeah.

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It's actually a tie, he just doesn't know how to tie it.

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I like it. I like it.

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-It's not him.

-Yeah.

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Why do you think number three?

0:12:290:12:31

Number two and three look a bit guilty, they're like, "Mmm"...

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-Guilty!

-Guilty!

0:12:330:12:35

-Like they don't want to be here.

-Yeah, like, "Oh, we're teachers."

0:12:350:12:38

Number three's looking at you now going,

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"It's your own time you're wasting!"

0:12:400:12:42

OK, let's delve deeper. If you've got any questions,

0:12:420:12:45

they're maths teachers, they know their stuff.

0:12:450:12:47

Who do you want to speak to? Sam?

0:12:470:12:49

-Can I quickly go down the line of all of them, please?

-Yeah!

0:12:490:12:52

And ask, starting with number one,

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what's the name of your school that you work in? Go!

0:12:540:12:56

Saint Mungo's High School.

0:12:560:12:57

-Two.

-Royston.

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-Three.

-Forfar Academy.

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St Columba's High School.

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-Oh.

-Ooh, look at it.

0:13:020:13:04

Number four was dead smug.

0:13:040:13:06

"High school."

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HA-HA-HA!

0:13:070:13:08

"These lot are still doing adding and sub... I'm long division."

0:13:080:13:12

-Any more questions?

-I've got, uh, number one,

0:13:130:13:17

7x7?

0:13:170:13:18

49.

0:13:180:13:19

-Oh!

-7x6?

0:13:190:13:21

42.

0:13:210:13:22

You just asked 49-7, that's what you just asked.

0:13:220:13:26

49-7?

0:13:260:13:28

42.

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THEY ALL LAUGH

0:13:290:13:30

-Very good!

-Which is actually his

0:13:300:13:31

neck size if you want to pick up one of those dickie bows.

0:13:310:13:34

I do, I really do.

0:13:340:13:35

Charlotte, you've got to have a question?

0:13:350:13:37

If someone in your class was talking, what would you say to them?

0:13:370:13:40

We'll go with number two first.

0:13:400:13:43

That's a dead easy thing

0:13:430:13:44

because normally you're supposed to be listening

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and when you're not listening, you get punished for it, so,

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you get detention.

0:13:500:13:52

I mean, I've been more convinced by things in my past.

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THEY ALL LAUGH

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It's not number two!

0:13:570:13:59

No...

0:13:590:14:01

Uh, number four?

0:14:010:14:02

Well, do you know?

0:14:020:14:03

I think I'd invite them to come up to the front of the class

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and just tell everybody what they're talking about.

0:14:060:14:09

Number one.

0:14:090:14:10

I think I would make a promise of the severest consequences,

0:14:100:14:14

should the talking continue.

0:14:140:14:16

I mean, that's the most Scottish thing I've ever heard.

0:14:160:14:20

And finally, number three.

0:14:200:14:22

Erm, I would probably say that you weren't disappointing me,

0:14:220:14:25

you were disappointing yourself.

0:14:250:14:27

-"I'm not angry, I'm disappointed."

-"Just disappointed."

0:14:270:14:31

-Yeah, yeah.

-The worst, the worst.

0:14:310:14:32

OK, Harriette's team, we've had some strong questions over here.

0:14:320:14:36

Number three, how long have you been a teacher for?

0:14:360:14:39

I've been a teacher now for 20 years.

0:14:390:14:42

Surely you were seven when you started, then?

0:14:420:14:44

-Absolutely.

-All right, easy!

0:14:440:14:46

I said ask them some questions, not flirt with them!

0:14:460:14:49

THEY ALL LAUGH

0:14:490:14:51

Sorry, sorry.

0:14:510:14:53

Erm, OK, number one,

0:14:530:14:54

seriously, where did you get your dickie bow from?

0:14:540:14:57

I got it as a present from some very grateful pupils.

0:14:570:15:01

-No way!

-There's no way a Scottish pupil would buy someone a bow tie.

0:15:010:15:05

"Oh, oh, Craig, it's been a great year this year,

0:15:050:15:09

"what should we get our maths teacher?

0:15:090:15:11

"Oh, I've seen these lovely dickie bows knocking about."

0:15:110:15:14

CROWD LAUGHS

0:15:140:15:15

Yeah, I know, well, I think we know who it isn't.

0:15:150:15:19

We're all in this room together.

0:15:190:15:20

The audience, I want to know - one, two, three or four?

0:15:200:15:24

Who do you think it is? Please vote now.

0:15:240:15:26

CROWD SHOUT THEIR CHOICES

0:15:260:15:28

Right, so there was a lot of fours in there,

0:15:400:15:42

there were some threes and then one guy said two

0:15:420:15:44

cos he just thinks it's funny. Right, so...

0:15:440:15:46

CROWD LAUGHS

0:15:460:15:48

..Charlotte, who do you think lied and who's about to get pied?

0:15:480:15:53

It's time to Pie the Supply!

0:15:530:15:55

-ANNOUNCER:

-Pie the Supply!

0:15:550:15:58

It's a tense time.

0:15:580:15:59

Ohhh...

0:15:590:16:01

Number two, I wouldn't worry about taking your glasses off.

0:16:010:16:04

CROWD: OHHHHHHHH...

0:16:060:16:08

Gently, gently, catchee monkey,

0:16:080:16:10

who's getting pied?

0:16:100:16:13

CROWD YELLS AND GASPS

0:16:130:16:16

-Oh! Ooh!

-Yep.

0:16:160:16:18

Oh, it's a brutal pie-ing!

0:16:180:16:20

A good pie-ing, that.

0:16:200:16:22

Don't forget, if you both get it wrong, there is a punishment.

0:16:220:16:27

Harriette, it's time for you to Pie the Supply!

0:16:270:16:29

-ANNOUNCER:

-Pie the Supply!

0:16:290:16:33

Nice and gently, but do get it right in the face.

0:16:330:16:36

CROWD: Ohhhhh...

0:16:360:16:38

CONTESTANTS: Ohhhh...

0:16:380:16:43

-Oh!

-Yes!

0:16:430:16:45

I don't know!

0:16:490:16:51

Well done.

0:16:510:16:52

You got some, uh, 3.145 in your face.

0:16:520:16:55

HA-HA-HA!

0:16:550:16:57

What is wrong with you lot?!

0:16:570:16:59

CROWD CHEERS AND WHOOPS

0:16:590:17:03

-Good, that.

-That was a great gag.

0:17:030:17:05

About time!

0:17:050:17:06

Right, so, OK, would the real supply teacher please step forward?

0:17:060:17:12

-WHISPERING:

-Come on, come on, come on...

0:17:120:17:14

-Oh!

-No!

-No!

0:17:140:17:17

-No!

-ARRRGH!

0:17:170:17:20

Because both of you failed,

0:17:230:17:24

our supply teacher now has the chance

0:17:240:17:28

to pie one of our team captains.

0:17:280:17:30

CROWD AND CONTESTANTS: Ohhh!

0:17:310:17:34

It's time for the Teacher's Revenge!

0:17:340:17:38

Now, I would like to make something clear about this wheel.

0:17:410:17:44

We designed this game before we put identical twins...

0:17:440:17:47

THEY ALL LAUGH

0:17:470:17:51

Do you know what one's you?

0:17:510:17:52

Yeah, the one with the longer - the hair down.

0:17:520:17:54

-This is you.

-Wait till it lands on it!

0:17:540:17:58

So Charlotte's blue, Harriette is red, who's getting pied in the face?

0:17:580:18:02

Here we go.

0:18:020:18:04

CROWD: Ohhhh...

0:18:040:18:09

Oh! It's Harriette!

0:18:090:18:11

It's red, it's red!

0:18:110:18:13

-It's Harriette!

-Oh, mate!

0:18:130:18:16

Harriette, it's time for you to

0:18:160:18:17

take your revenge - come down here, it's revenge time!

0:18:170:18:21

So stand down there, Harriette.

0:18:210:18:23

-Oh, no!

-Ahh!

0:18:230:18:25

-Come on, Harriette!

-Mr Allen, please make your way.

0:18:250:18:28

CROWD: Ohhhh...

0:18:280:18:34

Ready?

0:18:340:18:35

Arrrrgh!

0:18:350:18:40

I'm so glad that wasn't me!

0:18:400:18:43

And a bonus gold star for Mr Allen as well!

0:18:430:18:46

-Eyy!

-Wheyy!

-Woo!

0:18:460:18:48

Time now for Tune In!

0:18:530:18:55

-ANNOUNCER:

-Tune In!

0:18:550:18:57

This is a musical round where two members of each team

0:18:570:19:01

will be given a song to perform using one of these beauties.

0:19:010:19:06

It's a kazoo!

0:19:060:19:08

All the remaining team member has to do is guess what song is being

0:19:080:19:12

utterly slaughtered.

0:19:120:19:13

So, Charlotte, you're up first.

0:19:130:19:16

Who do you want to join you when you're playing your wee kazoo?

0:19:160:19:20

Hmm, I think I'm going to go for Sam.

0:19:200:19:22

OK, Charlotte and Sam, before you make your way up,

0:19:220:19:24

I've prepared something pretty special for your walk.

0:19:240:19:27

HE PLAYS STRICTLY COME DANCING THEME ON KAZOO

0:19:270:19:29

-STRICTLY ANNOUNCER:

-Please welcome to the floor,

0:19:290:19:31

Charlotte and her kazoo partner, Sam Nixon.

0:19:310:19:34

Yay!

0:19:370:19:38

OK, Suzi Ruffell,

0:19:400:19:41

your time starts when you flip over your first flippy thing -

0:19:410:19:44

so in your own time.

0:19:440:19:46

-No idea!

-Aw!

0:19:520:19:54

Next one.

0:19:540:19:55

-Do the hands as well!

-Easy, easy.

0:19:550:19:57

-Oh, Single Ladies!

-Yay!

0:19:580:20:00

SHE HUMS ALONG

0:20:070:20:11

Ah!

0:20:150:20:16

# You're gonna hear me roar... #

0:20:160:20:18

Yay!

0:20:180:20:20

# You can't stop the feeling... #

0:20:260:20:28

-Yay!

-Yeah!

0:20:280:20:30

-Oh, Gangnam Style!

-Yay!

0:20:340:20:37

-Very good!

-That was good!

-That was good!

0:20:370:20:40

Well done!

0:20:400:20:41

-Sit back down. Sit back down.

-Very good.

0:20:410:20:44

Right, Harriette, out of Ray and Mark,

0:20:440:20:46

who do you want to be joining you on the kazoo?

0:20:460:20:49

Hmm...

0:20:490:20:50

-Mark.

-Mark.

-Yep.

0:20:500:20:52

Guys, fear not, listen to this.

0:20:520:20:55

HE PLAYS STRICTLY THEME ON KAZOO

0:20:550:20:56

-STRICTLY ANNOUNCER:

-Please welcome to the floor,

0:20:560:20:59

Harriette and her kazoo partner, Mark Rhodes.

0:20:590:21:01

OK, Ray, your time begins when you flip over your first flippy thing.

0:21:070:21:10

In your own time, mate, take it away.

0:21:100:21:13

Firework!

0:21:160:21:17

Yes! These boys are good.

0:21:170:21:18

Er...

0:21:260:21:27

-..Let It Go.

-Yes!

0:21:270:21:28

Rolling In The Deep.

0:21:350:21:36

-Oh!

-Aw!

0:21:360:21:37

Er, nope, not a clue.

0:21:430:21:44

Get the high notes!

0:21:500:21:51

BELL RINGS

0:21:560:21:58

Oh! Ha-ha-ha!

0:21:590:22:01

Oh, i-is it Chandelier?

0:22:040:22:06

Yes!

0:22:060:22:07

APPLAUSE

0:22:070:22:08

Yes! Bonus gold star there for me.

0:22:110:22:13

THEY ALL LAUGH

0:22:130:22:15

OK, I can reveal that at the end of that round, the gold star goes to...

0:22:150:22:21

..Charlotte's team!

0:22:210:22:22

-Yes!

-Whey!

0:22:220:22:23

APPLAUSE

0:22:230:22:24

Woohoo!

0:22:240:22:26

Time now for the School Run!

0:22:290:22:32

-ANNOUNCER:

-The School Run!

0:22:320:22:34

Yes, it's a wheely race around the studio on tricycles.

0:22:340:22:37

The team's job, to drop my little brother and sister off at school.

0:22:370:22:42

You can see the family resemblance.

0:22:420:22:44

CRASH!

0:22:460:22:47

CROWD LAUGHS

0:22:470:22:49

OK, the first team to drop everyone off at school

0:22:490:22:52

and make it home first are the winners.

0:22:520:22:54

Guys, are you ready to go?

0:22:540:22:56

Eat my dust!

0:22:560:22:57

Yes, I am.

0:22:570:22:58

CROWD LAUGHS

0:22:580:23:00

Are you good to go?

0:23:000:23:01

Yep.

0:23:020:23:04

-Good trash talk.

-It's Sam versus Mark.

0:23:040:23:07

-Don't you dare!

-Then, it's twin versus twin,

0:23:070:23:10

then comedian versus comedian.

0:23:100:23:13

Who will be triumphant?

0:23:130:23:15

Your time starts in three, two, one,

0:23:150:23:18

GO!

0:23:180:23:19

CROWD CHEERS

0:23:190:23:23

Oh, no!

0:23:230:23:24

He's got an early start!

0:23:240:23:27

Yeah!

0:23:270:23:29

Yeah!

0:23:300:23:32

That's what I'm talking about!

0:23:320:23:34

Ha-ha, woo!

0:23:340:23:35

THEY ALL CHEER AND YELL

0:23:350:23:38

Woo!

0:23:380:23:40

Come on!

0:23:400:23:41

A-HA-HA-HA!

0:23:410:23:43

MR SMASH YELLS AND GRUNTS

0:23:430:23:48

Come on!

0:23:480:23:49

THEY ALL CHEER AND SHOUT

0:23:490:23:53

Is it not just the same again?

0:23:530:23:55

MR SMASH YELLS AND GRUNTS

0:23:550:23:58

Where am I going?!

0:24:030:24:05

Go on!

0:24:050:24:06

Come on!

0:24:060:24:08

We like it, we like it, we like it!

0:24:080:24:10

Go, go, go, go!

0:24:120:24:14

Go, go, go, go, go, go, go!

0:24:160:24:20

Go, go, go, go, go, go, go!

0:24:200:24:24

-MR SMASH:

-Daarrgh!

-SHE SCREAMS

0:24:330:24:35

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

0:24:350:24:37

MR SMASH YELLS AND GRUNTS

0:24:400:24:42

Oh, and here it comes round the corner.

0:24:450:24:47

CROWD CHEERS AND WHOOPS

0:24:520:24:53

No!

0:24:540:24:56

He's a cheat, Sam's a cheat!

0:24:560:24:59

Go on, Ray!

0:24:590:25:00

-Go, go, go, go, go, go!

-Go on, Ray!

0:25:000:25:03

Get the baby!

0:25:030:25:05

-Go, go, go!

-Go, go, go, go, go!

0:25:100:25:13

Give me a push!

0:25:130:25:14

CROWD CHEERS

0:25:170:25:21

Stop it!

0:25:290:25:31

Go and help, go and help them, go and help them!

0:25:310:25:34

It's so close, it's so close!

0:25:430:25:47

Who's going to win?!

0:25:510:25:52

SHE SCREAMS

0:25:540:25:56

Ah!

0:25:560:25:57

CROWD CHEERS

0:25:590:26:01

AIRHORN

0:26:010:26:02

CROWD LAUGHS

0:26:040:26:06

OK, at the end of that

0:26:060:26:07

round, the gold star goes to Charlotte's team!

0:26:070:26:10

CROWD CHEERS

0:26:100:26:13

And that's just about it, all I need to do now is add up the stars.

0:26:200:26:25

Oooooooooh...

0:26:250:26:32

CROWD: Oooooh...

0:26:320:26:34

And today's winners are...

0:26:340:26:36

..Charlotte's team! Yay!

0:26:370:26:38

CROWD CHEERS

0:26:380:26:41

Woohoo!

0:26:410:26:42

Nooo!

0:26:420:26:43

Congratulations, you get to go home

0:26:430:26:46

with at least some of your dignity intact.

0:26:460:26:48

As for Harriette's team, not only does the dog eat your homework

0:26:480:26:52

but you get detention with Mr Smash.

0:26:520:26:54

It's time to do the Walk of Shame.

0:26:540:26:57

# La la la la la la

0:26:570:26:58

Losers!

0:26:580:26:59

# La la la la la la

0:26:590:27:00

Losers!

0:27:000:27:01

# La la la la la la

0:27:010:27:02

Losers!

0:27:020:27:03

# La la la la la la

0:27:030:27:04

Losers!

0:27:040:27:05

# La la la la la la

0:27:050:27:06

Losers!

0:27:060:27:07

-# Losers. #

-Losers

0:27:070:27:09

So that's your lot.

0:27:090:27:11

As ever, we probably didn't learn much, but it was fun trying.

0:27:110:27:15

See you all next time on...

0:27:150:27:17

-CROWD:

-The Dog Ate My Homework!

0:27:170:27:21

Sees ya!

0:27:210:27:23

CROWD CHEERS

0:27:230:27:25

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