The Bygraves/Down With School The Story of Tracy Beaker


The Bygraves/Down With School

Drama series about a young girl in a children's home. Tracy and Justine are so sick of Michael that they hatch a plan to get rid of him for good.


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Transcript


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# I can make my world come true All my dreams will see me through

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-# It doesn't matter What may come my way...

-No! No!

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# Believe me now I will win some day. #

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MUSIC: Theme from "Captain Pugwash"

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AA-RRR!

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Say hello to the sharks. DOLLY SCREAMS

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Anything to say before I feed you to the fish?

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-Yeah, you're a big pathetic creep.

-DOLLY SCREAMS

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BOTH: Look what he's doing to Dolly!

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Coward!

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-Are you all right?

-Yeah. He said did I want to feed the fishes!

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-I didn't know he meant ME!

-Come on, let's play.

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AA-RRR-RR!

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DOLLY SCREAMS

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Bullying, I'm afraid.

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-I don't like to tell, but...

-You did the right thing.

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Tracy Beaker, Justine Littlewood, can I have a word, please?

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Can you believe that?! She thinks WE'RE picking on the tiddlers.

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-He's got to go.

-The sooner he gets fostered, the better.

-But who'd have him?!

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-You promised.

-I said I'd try and sort something.

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-I want to see my grandpa.

-I'd like someone to go with you.

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-I

-could go with her. No, you're right. Bad idea. Never mind.

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Satisfied? Now there's two of us. SHE SNEEZES

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Watch my lips.

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It was Michael who was bullying Dolly.

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-Right, I give up.

-Good.

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This nice couple have been in touch...again.

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They don't discourage easily. If you'd like to meet them, I could...

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Nobody in their right minds would live with these people.

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They're a total nightmare. Not to mention desperate. They'd foster anybody.

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-Tracy...

-On second thoughts, could you set up at a meeting?

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-Who have you got?

-What are you on about?

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Elaine's set us up with mystery families. It's like Blind Date -

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"Number 3, does your house ming of cabbage?"

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-"Michael - Barbara and Dave Crenshaw."

-Ooh!

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-What, you know them?

-I hope you like ballroom dancing.

-Why?

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-She'll teach you. Just don't stare at her warts!

-I don't wanna dance.

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You'll be happy just to get out of the car. They smoke - it reeks.

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-Of cigarettes?

-No, cat sick(!)

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I could switch with you.

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-What do you want?

-You'd better leave Dolly alone from now on.

-Yes, all right.

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It's not too bad. Nice house, a good-sized garden.

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-It's the pits.

-That's a bit harsh.

-He shouldn't be in a nursing home.

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-There's nothing wrong with him.

-Jackie? Jackie!

-Grandpa!

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Hello, my love! They said you wasn't coming.

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They lied, then, didn't they? Grandpa, this is Crash.

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-Hi, nice to meet you.

-Hello.

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-Oh, hi. Are you the...?

-Bygraves, that's right.

-You must be Tracy.

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-Let me look at you.

-Tracy's not feeling very well.

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-Oh, dear.

-That is a shame.

-There's someone else.

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-He was meant to go out with another family, but they let him down.

-Oh!

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You don't think he'd like to meet us, do you?

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I'd say there's quite a good chance. Follow me.

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Come and sit here, Michael.

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We're sorry the other lot let you down. Their loss.

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It must be so difficult.

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Yeah, well...

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I nearly forgot.

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Here.

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-It's a rhyming dictionary.

-I bet you've not got one already.

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Um, no. Thanks.

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-Indispensable when you're writing a song.

-Or poetry.

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I write the odd poem myself, Michael.

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Read him the one about the kittens.

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Um, could you excuse me a minute, please?

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(Michael!)

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Two people - loud.

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-Tell her that I'm sick.

-Tracy said I don't have to do what you say.

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-Want to taste my cat o' nine tails?

-Your what?!

-You don't want to know.

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-How was I supposed to know?

-Just how much are they?

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They just won the lottery. How much does that make you?

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-What if you didn't get on?

-So what? I could go to boarding school,

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-have my own swimming pool and a pony.

-Yeah. But what about Michael?

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He doesn't know yet.

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I will have to get them back off him before he twigs.

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-I'm afraid he's sick. Very, very sick.

-And now,

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I'm much, much better. ..There. Now, beat it.

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Now then, where are we going?

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Bad luck, Beaker. Ker-ching!

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A hearse?!

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A funeral director, called Bygrave!

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HORN HONKS "The Funeral March"

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So, there I was, everyone in the stadium on their feet,

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and this Belgian and me neck-and-neck.

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Carry on, I'll just get some drinks.

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My legs were like rubber. He gets in front,

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then keels over, so I crawl across the line on my knees!

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-You should have heard that crowd roar.

-Wow! You're fitter than me.

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Oh, by the way, you didn't tell me,

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who's your young lady friend? She seems very nice.

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This is fantastic. You shouldn't have gone to this trouble for me.

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-Oh, it was no trouble.

-That's right.

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Poor Tracey, to be missing this.

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Shame.

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It's so nice sitting here with you.

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-If you only knew how much we'd wanted...

-Nelly...

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So, your lives are really going to change. Have you thought about what is going to be like?

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Oh, Michael, all the time.

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I just think we should be a bit careful.

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Very wise.

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-You don't want to go and blow it all now, do you?

-We certainly don't.

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Would you care to try one of these, Michael?

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-What are they?

-They're my wife's speciality.

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Liver rissoles.

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Delicious.

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Do you like singing? I bet you do.

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We're in a choir.

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-Maybe you could join if...

-Nelly!

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I'm sure you know this one. Join in if you like.

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# Kumbaya, my Lord... #

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CHILDREN GIGGLE # Kumbaya

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# Kumbaya, my Lord

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# Kumbaya

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# Kumbaya, my Lord... #

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-Hi.

-Hi.

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-This is a nice place.

-You've been at the Dumping Ground too long!

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Look, it might not be such a bad idea for your grandpa to stay.

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Don't be stupid.

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No, really. He, er, asked me who you were.

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What do you mean?

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If he can't remember who you were, maybe he needs some looking after.

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Does that look like someone who needs looking after?!

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-We've so enjoyed today, Michael.

-Me too.

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We'd like to have a word with Elaine about you, if it's OK.

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Start the ball rolling.

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Really? That's great. I mean, if you haven't got too much to think about.

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-With the big win, and everything.

-Win?

-Yeah.

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-We haven't won anything.

-But...

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-What about the Lottery?

-Lottery?

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We don't do that. It's a mug's game.

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What were you two thinking?!

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We were just trying to help.

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-Help?!

-Him get fostered.

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You wish. Michael!

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The one day I was hoping for a break.

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-So you mean, he's not leaving?

-No, Justine.

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So that's it, then.

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Er, not quite. There's something that I want both of you to do.

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-So that's the story.

-It was just a bit of fun. Sorry.

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We can't have children, you see.

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Silly...to get our hopes up.

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But...it's everything, don't you think?

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Having your own family.

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-Yeah, you're right.

-It is.

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Look, we're really, really sorry.

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-Honestly.

-If there's anything we can do...

-Anything.

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That's the end of visiting time.

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Oh, hello! Can I introduce my granddaughter, little Jackie Hopper?

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Not so little now, eh?

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Well, time to move along.

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You've got a very nice place here. Which is your room?

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This is where YOU live.

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Is it?

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Oh, that's right.

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Miss you, love.

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I'll be back soon.

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-I could slip him out, if you stall the nurses for a minute.

-Jackie!

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I don't think this is a good idea. Sorry.

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Don't worry. I'll get him out one way or another.

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Morning!

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Ah! Girls, we'll put yesterday behind us, shall we?

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-I've got new foster parents to show you.

-I don't think so.

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-Too much of a minefield.

-Who knew adults have feelings?

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-Besides, we've got a visit.

-Oh?

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With who? CAR HORN BLARES

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You've got to admit this is miles better than doing your homework.

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I hate Mondays. Double mussel sprocket - yuk!

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-Hey, Crash, don't forget you've got a spelling test today.

-Oh, no.

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Run away again, Jackie?

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Just cos your grandpa's a champion runner, it doesn't mean you are too!

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-That is enough, Michael.

-You ought to lock her up, Shelley,

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now the school have chucked her out.

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-They didn't chuck me out!

-Michael, enough!

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I just had better places to go, OK?

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ALARM SOUNDS

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They chucked you out so you have to do all your work here on your own...

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-in between running away.

-Which part of "enough" don't you understand(?)

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At least Jackie didn't spend every lunchtime ALONE.

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Just drop it. Once Michael settles in he'll make lots of new friends.

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-ALL: No!

-Jackie, I'm away today...

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-Great, I'll go and see Grandpa.

-Your home tutor's left you lots of work.

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-Nathan will supervise you.

-Nathan?!

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I'll see you later. And no more running away, OK?

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I'm not promising anything.

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-I wish I was staying home.

-Me too, even if it is with Nathan.

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Tracey, you're not going to bunk off, are you? It's football today.

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-And treacle sponge.

-And history with Miss Penwellyn.

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Oo-ooh(!) Big deal. I'd much rather spend the day with Jackie.

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-Why can't

-I

-have a bit of home tutoring too,

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-especially as Nathan's in charge?

-Blah-blah-blah-blah...

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-You'd never pull it off.

-Just watch.

-Have a nice day at school, Michael.

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Have a good day at school, dudes.

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Hurry up, Bounce. You're going to be late for Miss Penwellyn.

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Layla, your physio's coming round today, remember?

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But I'll miss my play rehearsal.

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-It's all arranged.

-But I'm the Psychopathic Fairy!

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I get to zap everyone into a coma!

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We're doing Sleeping Beauty.

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-Ah. Sorry, Pumpkin.

-I don't want to miss school, Nathan.

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-It's not fair.

-I know.

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Aaargh!

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-AAARGH! AAARGH!

-Michael, what's happened?!

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-I fell down the stairs! My foot hurts!

-Let's see.

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-AARGH!

-I'll ring an ambulance.

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-No! I'd better get to school.

-Whoa, dude! You're not going anywhere!

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-Oh. Have a nice day at school, Tracey.

-Come on, you'll be late.

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Don't worry, Nathan. We're not going anywhere.

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-What?!

-School stinks...big time.

-Today, we're into home education.

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-You can't do that!

-Jackie does.

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You've got to go to school! Think of the things you've got to learn,

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like who invented the bicycle and who discovered the potato.

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We're not going and there's nothing you can do about it.

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-You all right, Nathan?

-Aargh!

-Yeah, everything's fine.

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Come on. Quick, off you go.

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-Keep your wig on!

-We're going.

-Aargh!

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Jackie, it's about time you did some work now.

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Don't be a spoilsport, Nathan. I'm winning.

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-Chill out, Nathan.

-Chill out? Me? Chill out?! Right, that's it!

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-What is?

-You want to stay home? Fine. Meet your new tutor, dudes.

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So...two-thirds is bigger than three-quarters.

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No... It's gotta be the other way round. Or was it three-fifths?

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-Pass me that bit of cake, Tracey.

-What, this one?

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-Mmm. This is yummy.

-Stop eating the maths equipment!

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OK.

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-Want a fight?

-Come on, then!

-Pack it in now! Come on!

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-This isn't fractions! Come on!

-Have another fifth!

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Nathan, try a sixth!

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-What on earth is going on?!

-Eighth of cake, Elaine?

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Elaine, you got my message.

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No. I popped in to see Jackie. Why aren't you two at school, Tracey?

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We want to be home tutored too.

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Jackie's special. The school will take her back when she calms down.

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Blah-blah-blah. You can't force me to go!

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-And you can't force us!

-I've tried everything.

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-They won't budge.

-Right.

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Well, there's only one thing to do.

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-Phone Shelley, tell her to come back?

-No, Nathan.

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Allow them to experiment with home education.

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-You're not serious...

-Perfectly.

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I can't take it. There's this lot,

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Michael's fallen down stairs and hurt his foot,

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Layla's complaining about physio!

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Deep breath, Nathan.

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Exhale... Exhale now!

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Why don't you take a break? Go and make yourself a nice cup of tea.

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-I'll take over here.

-You?!

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Right...fractions.

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Now, supposing I had a large pie and I cut it into pieces and...

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-What kind of pie?

-I don't know. Um...

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-You don't know the flavour?!

-It could be dodgy meat passed off as apple!

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Or snot and bogey.

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-The point is...

-The point is, Elaine, this is very, very boring.

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-What do you WANT to learn about?

-How about why we're here on Earth?

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The secrets of the universe? Or the solar system?

0:20:300:20:34

Hi, Layla. Want a game of cards?

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Or something else? You choose.

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-Go away.

-That's not very nice. You should be happy.

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-A day off school...

-I didn't have a choice...unlike SOME people.

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How's the ankle?

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Yeah, funny, that, isn't it?

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One minute it's fine, the next it's not.

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-Shall I test you?

-No! Go away!

-I only asked!

0:21:030:21:07

Hey, look, I can fly! I can fly!

0:21:100:21:12

Michael, stop it! Give me them back! Michael!

0:21:120:21:17

OK. Pay attention, everyone.

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I present to you...the solar system!

0:21:240:21:27

I will demonstrate how a black hole operates.

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A black hole sucks in all matter... like this.

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-MOTOR WHINES

-I'm not sure that's a good idea.

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Nothing can survive - planets, stars...

0:21:370:21:40

-Elaine, Michael's got my costume wings!

-I have not!

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-Layla, what would a big boy like Michael want with those?

-Aargh!

0:21:510:21:56

-Aargh!

-Oh, you poor thing!

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How could you chase him like that, Layla?!

0:21:580:22:01

-But...!

-If you've got nothing better to do, you'd better join us.

0:22:010:22:06

Right, we'll give the room a tidy,

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and then start some nice geography work.

0:22:080:22:11

-Do you like geography, Michael?

-Yes. It's my favourite subject.

0:22:110:22:16

-Everything all right, Elaine?

-Fine.

0:22:160:22:18

-Layla, your physio cancelled, so you'll make your rehearsal.

-How?!

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SOMEONE'S hidden my script and costume!

0:22:230:22:28

..and little by little over hundreds and hundreds of years,

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slowly the river makes a new course.

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Taking a short cut, but doing it very slowly -

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so slowly that you wouldn't even notice it.

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Carving itself a new path,

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but still leaving the old route, which...

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-Where are you all going?

-It's lunchtime, Elaine.

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I didn't think anything could be more tedious than school.

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But this has been my best day ever. It's so boring here on my own.

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Why are Nathan's sandwiches soggy?

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I'd swap them all for some treacle sponge.

0:23:280:23:31

-Me too. It's the cross-country race this afternoon.

-Is it?

0:23:310:23:35

-I wish you'd come back to school, Jackie.

-Me too.

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-They're giving away a silver cup for first prize.

-You'd win easily.

0:23:390:23:43

Layla?

0:23:430:23:45

GLASS BREAKS Who said you could come in my room?!

0:23:470:23:52

Think it's funny, do you?! My brother got me this!

0:23:580:24:02

Well, see how funny you find this!

0:24:020:24:05

Michael! No, I didn't mean...!

0:24:070:24:10

-Give Layla her stuff back!

-No way! I'm going to rip them to pieces!

0:24:120:24:17

-Don't!

-Michael, I thought you'd hurt your ankle.

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-Aargh!

-That really is very naughty to pretend like that!

0:24:240:24:28

He HAS hurt it, Elaine.

0:24:280:24:30

One minute it's fine and the next it's not.

0:24:300:24:36

-Sorry I broke your picture, Michael.

-It's OK.

0:24:390:24:44

Oh, I thought you were just pulling our leg.

0:24:440:24:47

Let me help you.

0:24:490:24:51

-Come on.

-Aagh!

0:24:510:24:53

Elaine, Nathan... I want to go back to school.

0:24:550:24:59

School?! Yeah... Yeah, great! What an absolutely great idea!

0:24:590:25:06

OK. I'll give the headteacher a call.

0:25:060:25:09

Come on, let's go!

0:25:090:25:12

My play rehearsal starts any minute.

0:25:120:25:15

-Let me help you, Michael.

-Aagh!

0:25:150:25:18

We'll do some nice geography this afternoon.

0:25:180:25:22

Are you sure about this, Jackie?

0:25:220:25:25

110% sure. Aren't you, Jackie?

0:25:250:25:28

I'm ready for school. I don't know if it's ready for me,

0:25:280:25:32

but there's only one way to find out.

0:25:320:25:35

# I can make my world come true All my dreams will see me through

0:25:350:25:40

-# And the fight won't get me down

-No! No!

0:25:400:25:44

# My dreams will turn things All around

0:25:440:25:47

# With a smile upon my face I can see a better place

0:25:470:25:51

-# It doesn't matter What may come my way...

-No! No!

0:25:510:25:54

# Believe me now I will win some day. #

0:25:540:25:59

E-mail us at [email protected]

0:25:590:26:01

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