Single White Female The Story of Tracy Beaker

# I can make my world come true

# All my dreams will see me through

-# It doesn't matter what may come my way...

-No! No!

# Believe me now I will win some day. #

BOTH: One, two, three.

One, two, three. One, two, three...

Ha-ha! I win.

What? My scissors beat your paper!

It's not paper, it's a big, fat laser cannon!

Your scissors have been disintegrated! Ha-ha!

Big, fat laser! Big, fat laser!

-Don't!

-Big, fat laser!

Anyway, I wanna do something else.

I'm bored!

Where is everyone today?

BORED!

What are you up to?

-We're very busy.

-We've been working out how to make maps.

Layla's got a theory. Now all we need to do is put it into practice.

-Om!

->

Om!

Om!

Do you mind? I'm trying to meditate.

-Om!

-It's no good. Everyone's doing their own thing. What can we do?

Om!

BORED!

CAR DOOR CLOSES

I remember when I was a student. It's awful, not knowing what to do.

Being lost and alone and feeling useless.

If you don't know what to do, just watch me.

-Just...watch...you.

-Yes.

-Have you done much work with children?

-Not yet, but, er...

-I have been reading this.

-Oh, Get With The Kids.

I can't wait to try it and get serious.

Oh, well, no time like the present.

Jackie, Crash...

Come.

Meet Kez.

-She's our trainee social worker.

-Yo, kids! What's up?

Um, you seem bling.

Word.

Oh, wait, I'm supposed to do a special handshake.

I can't believe I forgot! That's just basic.

Um...so...

Is it fist and fingers? Or...?

OK?

Bye.

Time to have some fun.

-Ready?

-Yeah.

OK...now!

-Hey! Look where you're going.

-Yeah.

Good. Be creative with your anger.

It's because you have abandonment issues.

It's all right. Panic over. I'm back.

Hello. I'm Kez. Word.

Who are you?

I'm sorry? You don't know who I am?

You don't need to know who she is. She's a has-been.

In my day, we had standards. Now, they let in any old rubbish.

I thought dinosaurs were extinct.

Put your hand up, who's been fostered. ..Oh, just me then.

Oh, have you? That's fascinating. Maybe we can talk later.

I might have a free window, but now I've been fostered, I'm very busy.

I can't stand Tracy Beaker. Come on.

Mm, conflict issues.

I haven't done that yet.

Can I just talk to you for one second about...?

OK, but not now, Kaz, Kez or whatever your name is.

Adult alert!

Crash, Jackie, how wonderful to see you. Let's catch up.

I'm having a great time. I'm really busy.

Busy, busy, busy. My days are just packed.

Yo, kids!

What's up? Blingin' blingin'.

Um, just keeping it real.

Tracy, could we have that chat about being an expert in fostering?

Expert in fostering?

Yes, you can learn a lot from the Beaker fostering success story.

I never want to be fostered. Thanks, but no thanks.

It's cool! Moving on, moving out. Now I'm living in the real world...

-Yeah, later, Tracy.

-We don't want to keep you from your busy schedule.

Ahem!

-Tracy, um...

-Bye, Tracy.

-So, can we have that chat now?

Word!

ALL: Word.

Blood, I need blood!

Not now, Marco. Maybe later.

-Don't even think about it.

-So, we all know our target?

An inexperienced, untrained social worker.

Fresh blood!

In Kez's book, it says she has to do whatever we want.

So, let's use it against her. ..Rio.

-You're up first.

-Why am I the pig?

Er, well, all right, you can be the toad.

Ha-ha!

SHE MUTTERS UNDER HER BREATH

Do you mind if we stop for a bit, Tracy? I can't feel my fingers.

Oh, there you are, Kez. I've been looking for you.

So? How have you been getting on?

Tracy's theories on fostering have been fascinating!

-You've been helping Kez?

-Mm-hm.

That's great, Tracy!

As you're doing so well, how about taking the children this afternoon?

Tracy, you can help. Your fostering experiences will be interesting.

Yes, you're right.

I am interesting.

Kez, I think you dropped this.

Oh, my book on establishing trust.

It's important to show children in care you can fulfil their needs.

Interesting. I need £5.

What for?

Chapter six.

I haven't seen Dad in ages. I don't know if I can trust an adult again.

Oh, dear. Fulfil your needs. Fulfil your needs!

Where did I put my purse?

Thank you.

Hello, I'm Hayley.

-Hayley?

-Yeah, my mum wanted a girl.

Anyway, Lol here needs special food combinations made for her.

Without sugar every hour, she dies.

I'd die.

Right, then, sugar. Sugar.

In there. Yeah, just in that one over there.

Oh, thanks. We need lots of chocolate. She needs loads.

Thank you, you're saving her life.

Ah!

Oh!

I'll take those.

When you're as experienced as me, you'll know if you're being suckered.

I'm onto you!

We got rumbled. So now what are we going to do?

Revert to plan B.

Yeah.

-What's plan B?

-The Beaker method.

Shout as loud as you can for as long as you can. Chocolates!

I want chocolate!

ALL: We want chocolate!

We want chocolate! We want chocolate!

We want chocolate!

We want chocolate! We want chocolate!

Being successful's all about getting on well with people, like I do.

I've got years of experience.

I help the kids with their homework,

my marmalade and peanut butter sandwiches are the stuff of legend

and I can cut through tension. The kids love me.

Right, let's see if we can put what you've learnt into practice.

Come on.

We want chocolate!

-We want chocolate!

-Ssh!

-Calm down now.

-We want chocolate!

Um, chill!

Hang loose!

Um...

SHUT UP! Everyone in the lounge. I've got a plan.

Quickly. Right, everyone take a seat.

-Now, come on!

-What is going on?

ALL TALK AT ONCE

Don't ask questions, sit down.

What are they doing here?

-Tracy Beaker Guide To Fostering - please!

-I'll have that, thank you.

I don't want to waste it on people no-one will ever want to foster.

The Tracy Beaker Guide To Fostering is all about working with what you've got.

Hayley, you're small and cute. Work with that.

Maybe later. Mark and Helen are coming to pick me up soon.

-But thanks anyway.

-Rio's a boy, but that's not always a disadvantage.

Take a question and pass them along.

Being successful is about getting on well with people.

Like I do. I've got 13 years of experience.

Use me.

-Oh!

-What?

With my expert help, you could all be just like me.

Fostered in no time.

Crash, Jackie, as you know, I'm a success story.

But you can be too.

Got any problems? Let's talk.

Let's talk. What's the matter with you?

We thought you'd a plan to get Kez and Elaine, but you're like them.

Me?! Tracy Beaker, like Elaine?

I couldn't be more proud of you if I tried.

Thanks, Tracy, for such an insightful talk.

Let's end the session with a hug.

-Tracy.

-Whoa! You can look at the Beaker, but not touch.

But Elaine told me

it's an effective way of bonding after sharing personal details.

If there's one thing Elaine taught me, it's to avoid her at all costs.

I mean, she's badly dressed, clueless and boring.

And if there's anything worse than Elaine, it's two Elaines.

But I was just trying to be as good as Elaine. Wasn't I, Hayley?

Um, I'm not Hayley. I'm Bouncer.

I'm sorry, Kez, I'm sure you're really nice,

-but one Elaine is enough for anyone.

-Yeah.

-You're so right.

There's only one Elaine and I can't expect to be as good as her.

But she's given me something to aspire to.

I'll go back to the library and study really hard

and maybe one day, I'll...

Maybe one day, I might be half as good as Elaine.

Er, respect! Everyone in the house, say...what is it?

Everyone in the house...

Everyone in the house, say...

See ya!