Zoo's Got Talent The Zoo


Zoo's Got Talent

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-# Bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-de-bo

-Mmm?

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# Za-boo-boo-be-do-boo-wah-wah-wah

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# Scab-skoo-di-bap-bap-zoo-bi-do-we wow-wow-way

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# Ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya

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# Ya-ya-ya-ya

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# Ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya

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# Ya-ya-ya-ya

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# Ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya

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# Ya-ya-ya-ya. #

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Shut up!

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It's Monday morning at the zoo

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and the public are arriving for a day of thrills...

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Why's everything upside down? Argh!

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-..spills...

-Oh, dude!

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..and, er, bills?

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That's not Bill, that's Trevor.

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Doesn't matter. Now, where was I? Oh, yes.

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All the visitors spend their days travelling from one end of the zoo

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to the other hoping to catch a glimpse of their favourite animals.

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-That is me.

-Right. Be it the lions...

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-Or gorillas.

-..or owls.

-Or gorillas.

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-..or elephants.

-Good morning.

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-Some animals are more popular than others.

-Gorillas.

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Stop it, Jurgen! I'm doing my thing.

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And at the end of a long day, the public can visit the gift shop

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where they come to buy souvenirs of the most popular animals in the zoo.

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-That's me again.

-Jurgen, shush!

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-Be it a lion, owl, elephant...

-Gorilla!

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Grr! Oh, my! One of the animals escaped. Oh, it's OK.

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It's just a kid. A kid in a mask.

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Where was I?

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Being popular with the visitors

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is an important daily part of daily life at the zoo.

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Like I said, I am the most popular element.

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-Ask anyone.

-What, that guy?

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Yes, except for that guy in the yellow T-shirt.

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-He's a bit tired.

-OK, well, I'll ask the keepers.

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Well, maybe not actually...

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Which animal is the most popular with the public?

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A lot of people ask where the meerkats are,

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which is surprising.

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-Did she say, "Surprising?"

-Yes, she said it was surprising.

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-What's surprising about liking a meerkat?

-I don't know.

-Rude.

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The meerkats? Don't be ridiculous. Those scrawny little things.

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They don't even look like cats, for starters.

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Er, boss, you know meerkats aren't actually cats?

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-They're actually from the mongoose family.

-Shut up!

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Anyway, trust me, I am the most popular.

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Don't listen to the ape.

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The public like us giraffes best because we're the tallest.

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Well, I'm the biggest, so surely I must be the most popular.

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Humans adore us as much as we adore humans.

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Sauteed with shallots and a dash of ketchup. Mmm, delicious.

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-Ridiculous.

-No, no.

-Definitely me.

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-Me.

-It's me.

-It must be me.

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Can everybody just shut up?!

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-That's my line.

-Yes, just... All right.

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Dudes, listen, why don't we just ask the gift shop?

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-Eh?!

-The gift shop?

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-Yeah, dudes, the gift shop. It sells souvenirs, yeah?

-Yeah.

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-Of all the animals in the zoo, yeah?

-Yeah.

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So, at the end of the day,

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if we count up which animal has sold the most souvenirs,

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-we will know who's the most popular.

-I like it, I like it.

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Wow, Dave, that's actually a really good idea.

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Actually, it's a really bad idea. Not that I'm worried or anything.

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Well, we'll soon find out if it's a good idea or not.

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Situated between the way out and the exit, the gift shop is run,

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managed and run by manager, Suzanne. So, Suzanne...

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-Oh, hello.

-How are you?

-Oh, very well, thank you.

-Good.

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-Who do you think is going to win the popularity...

-It's this. Follow me.

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No, no, in terms of the... Hold on, where are you going?

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We've got lots of different things.

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-We've got little pens, we've got the jewellery.

-Right, so...

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Who do you think is going to win the popularity contest?

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-Oh, that's a difficult question.

-Yes.

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Things for mum and dad, like photo frames...

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Yeah, but what about the popularity contest, that's what...

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Things to make the house look pretty, smell pretty.

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Good, that sounds lovely, but the popularity...

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-Candleholders, postcards...

-Suzanne?

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-..to send to your family when you've been on holiday.

-OK.

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I'm just going to go. OK, bye.

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So, Jurgen, you think you're going to sell more stuff in the gift shop

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-than anyone else?

-Of course.

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Who wouldn't want this face on a tea towel?

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I'm not so sure, boss.

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Look, all the other animals are really working the crowds

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to up their sales.

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Ta-da! Remember, guys, buy one peacock, get one free.

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Roll up, roll up, everything in the gift shop has to go today.

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You, boss, are just sitting here picking your nose.

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The other animals are going to sell way more stuff than you.

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If you want to sell stuff at the gift shop,

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you need to entertain the crowds.

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Jurgen? Jurgen?

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-Ah!

-Back in the gift shop

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and the souvenirs are flying off the shelves.

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And all the animals are desperate to boost their popularity.

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-Argh!

-SHE SINGS

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Drumming up the shop's business by doing their business.

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No, not that sort of business. Oh, really?

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Oh!

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The orang-utans are taking on a classical approach

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to their performance.

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RECORDER PLAYS

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The tortoises, however, are hoping to attract a younger crowd

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with some of their beatboxing.

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Yo, yo, yo! Gather round, people, look at my bro go.

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HE BEATBOXES

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That's awesome, buddy! This is in the bag.

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And over on Baboon Rock, its...

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Oh, no. Who gave Woody a microphone?

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-Hello, everybody.

-SCREECHING

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-Whoa, feedback. How's everybody feeling, huh?

-Bored.

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-It's great to be here at the zoo, huh?

-Get off!

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OK, OK, OK, OK. What do you call a pig that does karate?

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A pork chop!

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-Do you like it?

-BOOING

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Get off? Get off!

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Tough crowd.

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-Sorry, it's a no from me.

-And it's a no from me, pet.

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Where's your sense of humour, huh? Grow a funny bone. Really.

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Wait a minute, he's so bad,

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the humans are throwing rotten vegetables.

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No, tell him to keep going.

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Hello, what is all this noise?

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Like I said, boss,

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all the other animals are actually trying to entertain the public.

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You have no chance. I bet you're not going to sell anything.

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Nonsense.

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I don't need to make a monkey out of myself to sell stuff, Jeffrey.

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Those other guys are idiots.

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They may be idiots, Jurgen, but they're doing something right.

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It's nearly closing time and the gift shop's never been busier.

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Which animal is selling the most, Suzanne?

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We've got pens, we've got pencils, we've got...

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Yeah, actually, what I meant was... Could you...?

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-We've done this already?

-What else have we got?

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How about gorillas? Are they selling?

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Sloths, we've got different types of animals in here.

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Right, I'll check for myself, shall I?

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Oh, not selling at all.

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Wait, someone's interested!

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Told you, this is easy.

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Oh, no, that's awkward. They've changed their mind.

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Looks like they're after a tortoise instead.

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Boom! In your face, gorilla!

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Oh, dear, Jurgen, the shop's almost shut and you've sold nothing.

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What? How is that possible?

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Boys, what are you doing just sitting around like that?

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-Huh?

-How many times have I told you?

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If I'm going to win, you guys need to entertain the crowds.

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Here we go.

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Dave, get up on that stage over there

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-and do some of your sweetcorn juggling.

-Er, boss?

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Finally, my big moment. I just need to get my sweetcorn.

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Come on, Jeff. Hurry up!

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-I love sweetcorn juggling.

-Hurry up!

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The gift shop is about close.

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Check this out, man.

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Oh!

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-Dave, you are a waste of space.

-OK, need more practice.

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Quick, Jeffrey, play your nose flute.

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-I'm a bit rusty, I haven't played it for ages.

-I don't care.

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-Play!

-All right.

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FLUTE PLAYS

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APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

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Oh, that's absolutely beautiful!

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Fabulous. I'm close to tears.

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I'm surely going to win. I love you, Jeffrey.

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Yes, beautiful, but I'm sorry to burst your bubble.

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It's far too late. The count's over.

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I hate you, Jeffrey.

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After a long day's competition, the tills are shut,

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the shop is closed and the numbers are in.

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Suzanne...

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-Oh, hello.

-Hi. What's the verdict?

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It has been one of the busiest days we've had this summer.

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It's been a fantastic day.

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Yeah, that's all very interesting, but who's the winner?

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-Come on.

-Come on, tell her to get on with it.

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-Oh, right, let's have a little look. So...

-Yes?

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-If we're talking in how many we've sold...

-Yes?

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Oh, the snake.

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-The snake?

-The snake one.

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-Oh!

-Yes.

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-Huh?

-What snakes?

-Snakes, we don't have snakes in the zoo.

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Yes, we do, in the Reptile House.

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I just can't believe it.

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I'd like to thank my mum and my daddy, my auntie Annie

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and uncle Rodriguez.

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Shut up. Nobody cares. Get over yourself.

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SHE BLOWS A RASPBERRY

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HE CRIES

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-Oh, dear!

-I can't believe I didn't win.

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After everything I've done for this zoo.

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-Are you crying, Jurgen?

-No.

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I was just rinsing my eyes with my own tears.

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Don't worry, boss, you'll always be our favourite animal.

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Really? Do you mean that?

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Oh, yeah, sure, dude. Except for meerkats.

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-Meerkats are so cool.

-And the rabbits.

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Oh, and the squirrels and the guinea pigs.

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-Yes, and don't forget the peacocks.

-Yes, the peacocks. They're great.

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-I hate you all.

-And gibbons.

-Oh, yeah, gibbons.

-Geckos.

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-Yeah, geckos and geese. I like geese as well.

-Yeah.

-And snakes, Dave.

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-Snakes are cool.

-Don't forget the snakes, they're amazing.

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I truly, truly hate you all.

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