Bodyguard Trust Me I'm a Genie


Bodyguard

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I was hit by a can, opened it and out popped a genie!

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# Three wishes set me free

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# Trust me I'm a genie

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-# Wish one -

-And on that first day

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-# I got my very own cafe -

-Taa-daa!

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-# Wish two -

-That was cool

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-# I got my own swimming pool -

-Hee-hee!

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# But then I dropped the magic can

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# It filled with sand

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# And the works got jammed

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-# Wish three -

-A total catastrophe

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# The genie raved and ranted

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# But no third wish was granted

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# If one more wish comes true

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# Then I'll be free from you

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# Trust me I'm a genie. #

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In celebrity news, to stave off erratic fans,

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Sam Sahara will be attending the premiere

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of his latest movie bubble wrapped!

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While star Rita van Hump is to hire a bodyguard.

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Bodyguard to Rita van Hump, what kind of dope would want that job?

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Check it out, I'm in training.

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If I can keep this cardboard Rita safe,

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the real Rita will hire me as her bodyguard for sure.

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Hey, stop bothering cardboard Rita.

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Yah! Yib-a-yih!

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Ow!

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Haa!

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-Here, try this.

-Thanks.

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-Face it, Diego, you're just not bodyguard material.

-I'm not?

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Bodyguards are fearless, tough hombres.

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Trained to handle any threat with just their thumb.

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FANS CHEER

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-Rita!

-Ahh!

-Rita, Rita, Rita!

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-Rita, Rita!

-Will you sign my autograph?

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Diego, my hero.

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If only you'd use the third wish and you could be my bodyguard for real!

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Rita! Anything for you.

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Well, aren't you the sweetheart?

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-So, let's hear it.

-I wish I was Rita's bodyguard!

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I call upon the powers that be, make Diego Rita's bodyguard!

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And set me free!

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Ahhh!

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"Instruction manual for bodyguard kit. Kit to be sent separately."

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Everything you need to become the perfect bodyguard.

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-Oooh, inflatable biceps.

-And my official bodyguard ID card.

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With this bodyguard kit, we can't fail.

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A true bodyguard suspects everyone

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and speaks into his sleeve whenever possible.

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Crrcchhh, Diego to sleeve, repeat, Diego to sleeve.

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Don't like the look of this guy, over, crrcchhh.

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Ah, your inflatable biceps slipped down again.

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-Yeah!

-And, thanks to the celebrity magazines,

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we know Rita is presently filming a spy movie on location in the desert.

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Wow, wow, not so fast! You can't just go over there,

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-you've got to impress her first.

-What do you mean?

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You've got to save Rita from something dangerous,

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then she's bound to give you the bodyguard job.

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But, she isn't in any danger.

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Uh, oh. Feels like an earthquake!

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Ahh, an earthquake! That set could squish Rita any second.

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Ahhh!

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Not to worry, this expensive looking equipment broke my fall.

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Raargh!

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Yep, take my word for it, movie sets can be pretty dangerous places.

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-Ahh!

-Ahh!

-Diego, there's a fire on set!

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Crrcchhh, Diego to sleeve, repeat, Diego to... Fire! Fire! Crrchhh.

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Get a grip, this is your chance

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to save Rita for certain, now go rescue her.

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I've got her! Wahhh!

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Wahh!

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Make-up!

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When's that breeze you predicted going to sweep Rita to danger?

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Any time soon!

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Wahhh! Ahhh!

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Ahh!

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Wahh!

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Ziggy?

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You two again!

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Rita's never going to notice me.

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Obviously we need to think bigger.

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That's why we'll fake a kidnapping, which you will save Rita from.

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Trust me, I'm a genie!

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Read all about it, Rita van Hump wins award.

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Huh? It must be this way. Ahh, ha-ha!

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Award!

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Hey, where are all the adoring fans?

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-I adore you, I adore you.

-Oh!

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Must be budget cuts. Anyhoo. I would like to thank...

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Hey, what's going on here. Ahh!

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So, I 'ave finally kidnapped zee world famous actress,

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Rita von Humpy. Hee-hee-hee!

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Ahh! Help, help!

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I'm being kidnapped by someone with a ridiculous accent.

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Diego, super bodyguard to zee stars, can't possibly save you now.

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Hee-hee-hee!

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-Help! Help!

-Did someone mention my name?

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Take that, Mr Kidnapper!

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And some of this - ha, ho, ya.

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Bah!

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Nah!

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Oh!

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And for disrespecting one of cinema's most beloved actresses,

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take that!

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-Woah!

-Ahh!

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Ahhh!

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Look at your feet!

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Don't panic! I've got it covered!

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Ahhh!

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Oh, that could've gone better.

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Oh, you saved me!

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All part of the service. So, do I get the job now?

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Any moment now and I'm free!

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-What job?

-Huh?!

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-The job as your bodyguard, silly.

-That job was to protect

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my 6,000 pairs of designer shoes.

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Darling, I'd gladly entrust you with my life, but not with my shoes.

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-Wah!

-Huh?!

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Ahhh!

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Make-up!

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You saved my life AND made me pretty.

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I'll treasure this moment for ever.

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No!

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So, Rita, you've finally found

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a bodyguard for your vast collection of shoes.

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Please, obviously the big news here is my recent kidnapping attempt,

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which will be the subject of my new movie.

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Ah, Rita.

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The camel I adore from afar.

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Don't be jealous, my cherie, you are everything I could want -

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beautiful yet 100% recyclable.

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Music!

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ACCORDION MUSIC

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Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

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E-mail [email protected]

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