Episode 17 WHOOPS I MISSED THE BUS

This is Whoops I Missed The Bus!

Get ready for an entire week of CBBC shrink wrapped

and vacuum-packed for your very eyeballs!

So did you miss any of this?

MUSIC: "Gangnam Style" by Psy

What's this guy's problem?

And I shall devour them all!

And what has Dodge done now?

I forgot about Dave Lime.

BLENDER WHIRRS

If that's got your attention then stick around

because our video bloggers Lauren and Myles

have been watching CBBC morning, noon and night,

and they're here to give you the verdict.

I've seen so much CBBC it hurts!

Right, settle down, class, settle down!

It's time for our first teacher...

I mean, vlogger, sorry. It's Lauren!

'If you've ever wondered what secondary school's like,

'here's your chance to find out.'

So this is Our School,

and it's something that CBBC have never done before.

Basically, they've rigged up loads of cameras so that we at home can see

everything that goes on when you go from Year Six into Year Seven,

so I really like this show, it's a really cool idea.

But it must be a bit weird having cameras watching you all day long.

Like, what if you get caught doing something you shouldn't?

I'm just glad that no cameras were filming me when I was in Year Seven.

-BELL RINGS

-'3, A, X from 11,

'W, X squared Y,

'and it's also part of the second term.

'Terms that do not have a sign list in front of them

'are understood to be positive.

'Below are several examples that are not expressions.

X + .Y. This statement...'

One of the big concerns that you have when you're leaving Year Six is that

you're going to lose all your best friends.

I think I'll feel really scared, quite self-conscious,

and worry a bit, cos I won't be with my friends.

But do you know what?

I am happy to report that one of my best friends today is my mate Kim,

and we've been best friends ever since primary school.

MUSIC: "Gangnam Style" by Psy

Ah, I remember our Year Six Prom.

Me and Kim were the coolest kids that night.

I mean, we looked fierce!

What's that? Photo from the night?

Er, no, er, no, just,

I dropped my camera down the toilet.

Yeah, waterlogged, actually, yeah. No photos.

No photos from that night.

But the main worry I had about going to secondary school was the uniform!

-Like it?

-Wow.

-That looks good.

-That looks good.

That's very good, turn around.

When I was starting in Year Seven,

I was roughly the size of a garden gnome, and now I'm...

roughly the size of a garden gnome.

And the problem was my mum bought me, like, the world's largest blazer.

And the problem with that was that I didn't grow into it for years!

I literally spent, like, five years not being able to do,

like, everyday normal stuff like drinking a bottle of water!

People were starting to wonder whether I was a human or a seal!

See? Useless.

Go on, then, laugh it up, yeah...

So embarrassing.

-NARRATOR LAUGHS

-Oh, nice photo, Lozza!

Oh, don't know why I'm laughing.

You want to see my school photos.

They used to make me LIVID! Speaking of which,

what's been making you LIVID about CBBC this week?

The Worst Year of My Life Again, the series has ended. I'm LIVID!

Never, ever trust a tap on April Fools Day, Alex.

Someone will have rigged it.

Someone will have rigged it, and that was me!

I rigged the water fountain!

What?!

CBBC finishes at seven, and sometimes I don't get home

till after seven when I'm doing activities,

and it makes me LIVID!

The thing that makes me livid about CBBC is that on Pop Slam,

they have cardboard cut outs of the superstars.

I mean, why can't they just try at least to have the real pop stars?

Oh, no way, it's One Direction!

SHE SCREAMS

Ooh, what an angry lot!

Send us your vids to the usual address

and your lividness could appear right here very soon!

Now it's time to see what happened when Dodge met Mary Berry!

And believe me, it's not good!

On your marks, get set, bake.

-Hello, Dodge.

-Oh, hi!

-How are you feeling? All right?

Slightly damp. Very hungry.

Well, you're on the right show for that.

-So, what are you doing for us today?

-I'm going to make Flan a la Dodge!

-So, Dodgy Flan?

-Flan a la Dodge!

Everyone from the CBBC office has given me the ingredients.

What, like flour and egg, butter, sugar?

-No, Hacker gave me this old jar of meat paste.

-Mm.

-The Jam Lady gave me this jar of green jam.

-Yeah.

And Dave Olives gave me...

-Olives?

-No, I think he's got a pet rabbit. Yeuch!

Anyway, look, I brought the freshest, finest ingredients

all the way from down the bins.

Oh, look at that, how cute!

You've brought your own little mascot for moral support.

-There he is, look at him.

-Oh, yeah! I forgot about Dave Lime!

BLENDER WHIRRS

Ah, smells amazing!

OK, guys, you've got two minutes left!

I'd better get decorating! Ha-ha!

OK, bakers, that's it, your time is up!

Please step away from your benches.

'This is the last time they will face James and Mary.

'Now their cakes will be judged on their ideas, presentation and taste.'

I have to be honest with you, Dodge.

It's a bit rubbish.

Aww, thanks, you're too kind.

As I suspected.

A soggy bottom.

Yeah, sorry, Yonko made me a curry last night. Heh-heh.

'Dodge's flan may look rubbish,

'but what will James and Mary make of its flavours?

'Grotty garbage or baking brilliance?'

I have to say, Dodge...

..it isn't a flan.

-It is a triumph! It's delicious!

-Well done.

So, the winner of Junior Bake-Off is...

..Dodge T Dog!

-Yeah!

-Well done, old boy!

-Aww, thanks!

-The new Bake Off champion!

-Yeah!

I'm very pleased to...

JAMES BURPS

Eurgh, gross.

Eurgh, to, to win this trophy, and...

BELLIES RUMBLE

AARON BREAKS WIND

Oh, no. And, er, although I richly deserve it,

you have all been food poisoned!

Er, right, that's it, I'm out of here.

It's been an honour and a privilege for you!

I am Dodge T Dog, Junior Bake Off champion!

Thank you, ladies and gentlemen, good night.

Yesterday, I sat down to eat my breakfast whilst watching

an episode of Wizards vs Aliens.

GUNGE SPLOSHES

I'll leave that. Leave that till later.

So Wizards vs Aliens is basically about

the ongoing battle between the Nekross...

Launch the Tracker Bots!

..they're the aliens, and the wizards.

HE YELLS SPELL

They're the wizards. I'm watching it going,

"Guys, let's not fight. Let's be friends."

I shall come and I shall devour them all!

All right, yeah, sure, maybe not.

If you like Doctor Who,

then I think you'll also really like Wizards vs Aliens as well.

He likes it. The show's got everything.

It's got wizards, it's got aliens, it's got wizards again.

Not everything, that's two things, close to everything.

Wizards vs Aliens is a great combo.

Some other great combos, Wizards vs A Lion.

Wizards vs Alan,

just a man called Alan. Who's better?

Lizards vs Aliens.

Blizzards vs Aliens, just the aliens doing a weather report.

Wizards vs Aliens?

That sounds good, do that one. That one sounds like an actual show.

I did notice one of the aliens looks like a weird, massive,

speaking Yorkshire pudding with a face.

And now we shall feast as never before.

I have a plan.

Two eyes and a mouth, King of the Nekross.

That's put me off, actually.

Good, now I'll finish my bowl of cereal.

Have no fear,

I am ever scrupulous in harvesting its refined juice.

Oh, OK, yeah, and that's happened again.

I'm just going to move onto lunch now, you can have that.

LAUREN: 'Marrying Mum And Dad,

where the kids get to organise their parents' wedding!

It's funny, actually,

cos I actually organised my parents' wedding, yeah...

It was a nightmare.

I chose the theme "bins."

Mum was furious! Ooh, yeah.

Walking down the aisle in a bin bag, leftover pizza crust for dinner,

and as for the entertainment?

Well, we just watched two scabby rats have a dance off.

Dad loved it!

So, as you know, in this show, the kids have to organise

the transport for their parents to get to the wedding.

Forget posh cars, forget limousines, forget horse and carriages.

Actually, keep the horse, stick a hump on it.

-How are they going to get there?

-Erm, camels.

-Camels!

-Camels.

-Camels.

-We need a camel shop.

'A camel shop?! Do they even exist?!''

Yeah, there's one down the road!

And if you buy two you get a free pack of wet wipes.

That was in the eye that time, Humphrey!

So, the kids in Marrying Mum And Dad

are, like, ridiculously good at organising weddings.

-What we want is we want really heavy embroidering at the top.

-Oh, right.

Although we don't want it looking like...

Yeah, but we don't want it looking like fire.

'Looking like fire?

'Always a good idea not to have a wedding dress

'that looks like it's ablaze!'

I'd be rubbish! I'm so, so forgetful!

I'd probably, like, forget to pick up the cake,

I'd probably forget to bring the rings. In fact...

We are gathered here today

to celebrate the wedding of John and Sheila.

But unfortunately they're nowhere to be seen.

I assume the person who organised this remembered

to invite the actual bride and groom!

SHE LAUGHS

From Marrying Mum And Dad to The Dumping Ground,

I know some pets who love a bit of CBBC!

It's this lot!

'You want me to watch CBBC? Course I will! I'm watching ya!

'Placed your fingers on the lens! I don't know why I bother!'

'What am I meant to do, then?

'Watch the telly for Whoops I Missed The Bus?

'But I'm a dog! I don't watch telly, don't you get it?

'You're crazy, man!'

'Dogs on the telly? Come off it! What next?

'Talking dogs on the telly?!

'Gone crackers, modern society!

'Completely crackers, I tell you!'

'Bear Behaving Badly?!

'This show's almost as old as me,

'and I'm 109 years old!'

If you want your pet to have their moment of fame

then go to the website and search "Pet" for all the details.

OK, who's got two minutes and some highlights?

This guy!

Settle down and prepare to give your eyeballs a treat,

because it's time for some of our best bits, baby.

It's going so fast around the corners,

the tyres are going, "E-e-e-rgh!"

'This daredevil has even got time to throw in a few cool skids

'for good measure.'

Hooray! Look, it's been designed by Francesca, and I love it, look!

-How cool is this?!

-It's the real thing!

-It's genuine!

-Woo-hoo!

I really do hope my mum won't embarrass me

when I get to the, erm, school tomorrow because as soon as

I get out of the car she'll probably either try to hug me or kiss me.

As you're the guest of honour, Miss Adolf!

Marvellous.

Wow.

Oh, now that's really raw.

Ah, Vera, I don't think you're the right woman for the job, cocker.

"VERA" LAUGHS HYSTERICALLY

I think you're right there, love, I'll see you later.

Here we go, hands up, and I can't get out! I've got stuck! No!

OK, I'm out of the car, come on, Radzi. Get across quickly, mate!

OK, so a bit slower than Sam, I think. I've got back in. Arms go up.

Buckle in, seat belt in, done!

MUSIC: "Girls Just Want to Have Fun" by Cyndi Lauper

-HACKER SINGS ALONG

-Hey! Oi!

Oh, girls just want to have fun!

Guys, it's just five days until the new episodes of The Next Step,

and I've managed to find an exclusive clip.

This is what we've all been waiting for!

-I had to do this to protect myself.

-Protect yourself? Really?

Is that what E Girls do, protect themselves or protect each other?

Why did we even make this group?

Why did we even make E Girls

if we were all just going to fend for ourselves?

Like, not only did Emily lose her captaincy,

but now Emily and me lost a friend!

And so did you, you lost too!

Great Scott, that looked good! But it's all we've got time for.

We'll be back next weekend to put another week of CBBC under the

microscope, but if you can't wait till then, check out CBBC iPlayer.

Now, where's me bus? Oh, honestly, it's not funny any more!