Alex in Slumberland Wingin' It

Roger that, Leroy - attack the knee!

When do Alex's parents get back from Bora Bora again?

Guatemala, and not till tomorrow.

I don't know how many more sleepless nights I can take.

ALARM BEEPS

Midnight cookies, anyone?

Mom, Becky, it's a false alarm. It's just Alex. Again.

SHRIEKING

Alex, you OK?

I karate best under a crescent moon.

-Alex, will you please go to sleep?

-I don't need much sleep.

I'm like a giraffe.

It's true. I've literally seen him eat leaves.

We've got a music assignment tomorrow and I've got a date,

and right now I've got more bags under my eyes than a...bag store.

Sorry, boys, this is going to be an all-nighter.

Porter, isn't there anything you can do?

This sleep dust should put him out for a few hours.

Leroy, I found the secret...

-I hope he doesn't snore.

-Night, night, Alex.

-Game over, Leroy.

-'Leave the sword...!'

# Let's give it one more shot

# Let's give it everything we've got

# Cos if we get it right

# We will surely conquer the world

# Hey! I've got my wings

# From an angel

# Now we're wingin' it all the time

# I'm giving wings to an angel

# Always an angel

# Now we've got to learn to fly. #

I don't remember being a baby, but I sure slept like one last night.

-Me too. I feel like a gabillion bucks.

-Rise and shine, sleepy head!

It's six minutes past the hour. Porter, what's travelling?

I'm in the chopper looking down at a very sleepy Alex Rodriguez.

Yo, Alex! Up and at 'em!

Alex, we're having your favourite pancakes, buddy!

He's unwakeable, what did you do?

Oh, "extra strength". It must be more powerful than I thought.

We can't pass the music assignment without Alex.

I'll beam Alex to school, we'll do our music assignment

and beam home at lunch.

Let's go.

Oh, no-one's ever going to know he's sleeping(!)

I can only beam two people at once. Let's go.

Oh!

Question - how are we going to get Alex to play the drums?

Answer...

I saw it in a movie.

DISCORDANT NOISE

That was wonderful. I had no idea

you were familiar with existentialist performance art.

B+!

This is not going to work.

Someone's going to notice Sleeping Beauty.

Kiss him and see if he'll wake up, Prince Charming!

Nobody will notice.

Alex, I need you to second my nomination for president

of the science fiction club.

I had to join the science fiction club,

because I love science and I love fiction!

So science fiction is the ultimate marriage.

So what we're doing is making a list. OK.

Hmm. Alex, your handwriting is improving!

See?

Alex! Take a picture of me for my modelling portfolio.

Alex is like the best fashion photographer ever.

-So I've heard.

-He has such a creative, twisted view of the world.

Ooh, that's a nice shot.

Oh! A shoe shot. Brilliant!

Alex, your photo has truly captured my soul.

Hey, hey, Serge! Good talk. Bye!

Serge says stop!

Every day, Alex helps Serge with a riddle.

-What is broken when you speak its name?

-Silence!

Thanks, Alex.

OK, I think it's time that we got Alex home.

-Carl, I am so excited about our date tonight.

-Ha! Me too.

-I'll be there with bells on.

-I like a guy who jingles.

So, what are you three up to?

-Oh, you know, we're just practising for...

-A three-man sack race.

Where's your sack?

They hand them out at the event, cos people soup them up.

Porter, whatever you're planning,

don't let it interfere with our evening.

THEY LAUGH FORCEFULLY

Woo!

Oh. Let's get Alex home.

What took you so long?

-Should we be worried he's not waking up?

-No, we should be jealous.

-He's getting a good sleep.

-But we can't give him back like this.

-He's fine, he's dreaming.

-Must be having sweet dreams.

That's it! We'll beam into Alex's dream, wake him up from there.

-Have you done dream magic?

-First time for everything.

There's a first time for everything!

There's a first time for everything.

There's a first time for everything!

That should really be your catchphrase.

-Trust me.

-All right, fine, but let's do this quickly.

I need time to get ready for my date.

-He's dreaming about school?

-What do you expect? It's Alex.

-Hey!

Who dares barge into my throne room? BOTH: Alex?! That's King Alex.

-Seize them!

-We're being seized by a dream world King Alex?

There's a first time for everything.

-Guards, watch them!

-That's why we're here.

-Why is Serge an ogre?

You mean, more of an ogre than usual? This is Alex's dream.

This must be what his vision of the world is like.

So he thinks I'm some leprechaun and you're from Men In Black?

-I thought there would have been at least one dinosaur.

-DISTANT ROARING

Slight setback.

We have to put dream Alex to sleep so the real Alex will wake up.

Then we have to beam out, but our timing has to be perfect.

What if King Alex nods off while we're still in his dream?

We disappear forever. But who better to achieve

than perfect Porter Jackson?

Is this the same perfect Porter Jackson that got us in this mess?

-Yeah.

-Perfect(!)

-..Porter Jackson.

-Knuckle head.

-..Carl.

It's impossible to put Alex to sleep if we're chained to the wall.

-The prisoners are free.

-Look at that!

How did you get out of the shackles?

-Stay put or we'll knock you down!

-This guy's tough.

Despite the fact he's so teeny-tiny.

Why must you always put me down in front of others?

-You're super cool and I'm a leprechaun?!

-Seems pretty accurate.

Why must you put me down in front of others?

Time for the old Irish switcheroo.

Now we're inside the cell and they're out? What kind of malarkey is this?!

Chill out, relax. It's all gravy.

Let's find that throne. Carl, put on your best Irish accent.

-TERRIBLE ACCENT:

-All right, you can count on me.

-I said your BEST Irish accent.

-You can count on me!

-It'll have to do.

Let's go.

All right, fine, I'll follow you.

Carl? Carl!

I thought I'd give you a lift.

I guess I'll have to wait for our date's official start time.

Hey, Alex, have you seen Carl?

Alex?

Alex.

HE SNORES

I wonder if there's any AIT magic going on here.

This has Porter written all over it.

What else can that guy mess up today?

Oh, boy. It better not be my date.

PIANO MUSIC PLAYS

-We'll use the sleeping dust on King Alex and we're home free.

-Perfect.

Give me the bag.

# Who is the guy who means everything?

# Who makes us dance? Who makes us sing?

# Who is our most beloved king?

Alex!

-# Who is the boss who sits on the throne?

-I am!

-# Who's the popular guy who's never alone?

-Me!

-# Who's tougher than a petrified dinosaur bone?

-Moi!

# It's Alex, it's Alex, it's Alex, our king!

# Da, da, da-da-da da

-# La, la, la-la-la la

-Da, da, da-da-da da

# La, la, la, la

# Humila bibbily humila bibbily humila bibbily, ba! #

OK, Carl, now's your chance. Use the sleeping dust!

I don't suppose you'd want to be playing some catch now, would you?

Sure.

Those scallywags are impostors, and it's not right!

Woah, woah, woah. Be cool.

ALEX: This is a royal pickle.

You ordered a royal pickle, sir?

Thanks.

Hey, Alex, look at me, it's Carl - your best friend and loyal guard.

THEY are the impostors!

This situation calls for reinforcements.

Oh, just what we need, more leprechaun Carls(!)

Just what we need. More me. Cool.

Hoo-hoo-hoo! Hee-hee!

-Porter, the door's locked.

-We have to get out of this nightmare.

-BELL RINGS

-We were supposed to beam back to Alex.

-My magic must be a bit off.

-Everything looks so different!

-You can drop the accent now, Carl.

-I'm finally in the real world!

I've had so many dreams about leaving Alex's self-conscious!

Tag, you're it! Ha-ha-ha! Hoo! Catch me if you can!

Oh, come on, I'm likeable once you get to know me.

I brought back the wrong Carl - not cool!

-Oh, no! I'm stuck in Alex's dream!

-Join the club.

I said join the club! By club, I mean this stick thing and also

group of people what assembles for common likes and/or goals. HE GRUNTS

-THUD!

-Argh!

Oh, hey, Carl. New top, new lipstick, new earrings... Thanks for noticing!

Yeah, Carl, I called ahead and made reservations.

# ..his moves put us all in a trance. #

Ha, Carl!

It is a little early

to prep for St Patrick's Day, but I want to say -

-IRISH ACCENT:

-I like your school spirit!

You're going to make me blush, Malone!

May the wind be at your back.

Ah!

Ah, finger, finger, finger!

Yeah, let's see how funny you are

when I beam you back in Alex's dream.

Carl! What's with the green get-up?

The real question is, why aren't you wearing green?

He got the memo about going green but he took it too far.

Principal Malone meant eco-green, but he misread it...

Was that today?

I think I have a green headband in my locker.

LAUGHTER

Carl, did you borrow your little sister's tights again?

Shouldn't you be on the side of a cereal box?

Actually, I think you're late for the garden gnome convention!

It's just giving us so much to work with, I can't stop.

I can take any remark from a saucy blonde,

but you - you've insulted me honour. I challenge you to an arm wrestle.

-All right, come on!

-Nope, let's go!

I'm counting that as a win!

THEY LAUGH

-Unhand me, you ham-fisted lug!

-Time to get you back into Alex's dream.

It's long overdue. I'm weary of your company. Dream Porter's way cooler.

You're too clenchy.

My angel magic isn't working.

I left half my magic in Alex's dream with Carl.

I was supposed to beam out with him,

so now I can't beam back in without him.

You know, the King Alex in my world is more sprightly.

The Carl I know doesn't wear goofy outfits.

HE PANTS AND BARKS

Now do an intellectual!

-Ooh, that's nice! Now do a monkey.

-HE WHOOPS

-Now do intellectual monkey.

-HE WHOOPS

Dance, monkey, dance!

HE SQUEAKS AND WHOOPS

I thought that was going to be funny,

but that's just sad and sad makes me sleepy.

-RUMBLING

-My tiara!

-Me dizzy!

If Alex falls asleep, we'll disappear forever!

HE SNORES

Uh-oh.

He might be waking up!

Ah-ha-ha! Stay awake, my lord, stay awake!

All this shaking is wrinkling my princess gown!

-My scrolls are getting out of order!

-Ooh, Serge broke a nail!

SHOUTS GOBBLEDEGOOK

Your noises please me.

If you liked those noises,

then you'll want to stay awake for these ones!

SHOUTS GOBBLEDEGOOK

Can I get you anything? Some garlic bread, some salad?

-Perhaps a non-imaginary date?

-My date is not imaginary.

He's inconsiderate, he's insensitive, he's clueless,

but he's not imaginary.

Like I care! I'll go get you a slice of Pathetic Pepperoni.

-All right, Porter, where's Carl?

-It's kind of complicated. Come with me.

I told you to watch him, not draw on him!

Carl, you stood me up to play dress-up with Alex?!

What a beautiful treasure! You out-glitter the gold in me pot!

Porter, where's Carl?

Ha! See, here's the thing - you're going to laugh.

I may have beamed Carl into Alex's dream

and I may not have enough angel magic to get him out.

Unbelievable! How could you make such a rookie AIT mistake?

More importantly, how could you ruin my date with Carl?

If it's a date you're lookin' for, why didn't you just say?

-I'm free for the next fortnight!

-No, you're not.

You're coming with me to save the real Carl.

You're a feisty one, to be sure! I'll go anywhere with you.

It's been real.

It's been weird, freaky and a figment of Alex's imagination,

but definitely not real.

Ah! It's good to be back on me home turf!

I thought the moons of Neptune were freaky-doodle!

You know your way around this place - where are we?

If you want to get to Carl, we have to get to King Alex's throne room.

-But first, we have to get to the bridge with the ogre.

-The what?!

Green man says ogre! Who goes there? I guard bridge for King Alex.

-Only one way to pass.

-Yeah, whatever, we have stuff to do.

-No, you solve riddle, then you pass.

-OK, give me the riddle.

What is only part of song that can be crossed?

The refrain, the chorus... I've got it!

-The part of the song that can be crossed is the bridge.

-You pass.

But keep in touch. E-mail me. [email protected]. Dotcom taken.

-Wait, door price - three albino rats.

-I love albino rats!

Everybody love albino rats!

-And then they saw a unicorn, blam!

-Ooh, I like unicorns!

-And it was the colour mauve!

-I hate it when people call it light purple.

You know me so well.

And then it started raining Gobsmack juice

and they were approached by a Chantecler chicken

as big as a dinosaur.

Then the chicken laid a chocolate egg that was the size of a...

Halt! Intruders cannot pass, especially wearing a top like that.

Aye, Brittany's a fetching vision,

but she's got a tongue like a rattlesnake.

We can't pass till you beat her in a verbal duel!

Oh, this will be a breeze! Nice tiara, do you need glue

to keep it perched on that cantaloupe of yours?

Are you saying I have a big head?

Because if you look THIS good, then that's a plus.

The bigger the head, the bigger the face time.

I'd love to see someone put this big meanie in her place.

-You've got to hit her in her weak spot - in the hair!

-Oh!

Your hair has less bounce than a deflated ball.

-Oh, the Irishman says, "Snap!"

-How dare you diss my hair?

-I've seen better shine on a dirt floor.

-Oh!

-But I used coconut extract!

-Well, it's not helping with your frizz.

Why don't you make like your ends and split?

You may pass, and...I have to go find a mirror.

DENISE LAUGHS

We're back where we started!

No, we're not, we're just in Alex's mind.

To pass the brilliant Dream Jane,

you have to identify the proper grammatical term.

You have to get three right to pass.

Oh, man, I fell asleep during English class!

Your first term - "in accordance with".

It's, erm...

It's a complex preposition.

-How do you know that?

-I'm a complex leprechaun.

"In accordance with" is a complex preposition.

-Correct. Wow!

-"Wow" is an interjection.

I didn't mean that as a test question

but my nature forces me to follow the rules.

-Ha!

-One more to go.

-You'll never get this one.

Don't try to outwit me, because I'm too clever

and you must give up now, so doesn't that make you sad?

-It's an indirect passive declarative sentence!

-Not according to the book!

No, it isn't, it's a complex compound imperative interrogative sentence!

-Oh! I can't believe you got it right!

-Neither can I!

-I had a grammar textbook as a back-up plan.

-How'd you know I'd trick ya?

-You're a leprechaun, it's what you do.

-You can pass.

-You mean, "You MAY pass."

-Oh, step off, Simmons!

Ooh! Burn!

-So the chicken said, "I can't stand to be cooped up!"

-HE CLUCKS

So a guy walks into a heavy metal bar.

"Ouch!"

So I just found out recently that it takes three cans of water

to mix frozen orange juice,

but four cans of water to mix frozen lemonade.

Why?! I mean, they can make 'em the same!

-We've got the technology!

-RUMBLING

-Oh!

-Come on, stay awake, my lord, stay awake!

Did anyone have roast beef?

Leprechaun Carl, distract Dream Porter.

I can't say no to someone as lovely as you.

TRADITIONAL IRISH MUSIC

Am I glad to see you! Wait, are you real or part of this dream?

You stood me up for our date!

Yep, you're real Denise.

-I am so mad at you!

-I'm sorry, but I was a little tied up!

Actually, I was shackled to a wall.

I'm assuming you have a plan because if you don't,

stay a while, next show starts at ten.

We don't have time, I'm here to save you.

Hurry, King Alex is almost asleep.

For a clean beam, we should stay close.

-That's weird, Porter and I never have to do this.

-Shh.

If they knew upstairs that we were snuggling, there'd be hell to pay.

But when an angel's beaming in or out,

it's hard to track what they're doing.

That's why I'm sneaking in some snuggling now.

-We're not beaming.

-I know.

-Oh! You're back!

-Uh, Denise, I think we're here.

-Oh, so we are.

Carl, it's so good to see you back in normal clothes.

-I didn't mind the leprechaun look.

-What can I say, I'm versatile!

Morning, everybody!

It's evening, but how'd you sleep, Alex?

Not so well. I could have used a couple more hours, but don't worry,

I'll power-nap later.

Denise, congratulations on your successful mission

to the most dangerous territory known to man - Alex's brain.

Look, I'm sorry I stood you up.

It's OK, being stuck in a dream was a pretty good excuse.

Besides, I still got to hang out with you.

Actually, it was a leprechaun version of me.

IRISH ACCENT: Right you are, laddie. You'd still be owin' me a date.

This time, I don't want to be no date in a dream.

-IRISH ACCENT:

-Would you settle for a dream date?

MOBILE RINGS

Hey, Mom.

You guys are going to be another week?

No, they won't mind. I've been a dream guest!

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

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