Mirror, Mirror Young Dracula


Mirror, Mirror

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-Aaarghhh!

-Aaarghhh!

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Get off!

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For garlic's sake, Boris!

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-You were sleep-flying again.

-Was I?

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Face it. You're becoming a vampire.

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I can't be!

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I'm not turning 16 till next week!

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Why d'you think I had to ban Robin from the castle?

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That was a misunderstanding! I was squeezing a spot on his neck.

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What, with your teeth?

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Not a good sign.

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Look, I hate to say this, but

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I don't think we can share a room any more.

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-You're throwing me out?

-Oh, no!

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-Well, yeah. There's a spare coffin in the crypt.

-The crypt!

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-With the dead people!

-We're vampires. Dead is our middle name.

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Don't do this, Vlad. I'll protect you with my ultra sharp vampire hearing.

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-Nothing can take me by surprise.

-Boo!

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Aaarghh!!!

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-We heard screaming.

-Have you scoundrels got a victim in here?

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-Just doing a bit of flying practice, Dad.

-Oh. Pity.

-Get out here, boy.

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Show me your fangs.

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Mmm...

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a bit underdeveloped - not to worry.

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-We'll start small, just a few cute bunnies.

-You mean, kill them?

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No, take them synchronised swimming.

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Of course kill them! You want to be a vampire, don't you?

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I...

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I don't know.

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Well, you'd better make your mind, and fast!

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Like there's a choice!

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Are you saying there's a choice?

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Oh, look at that... it's six in the morning!

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Coffin time!

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I feel sick.

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Five across...

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SNORING

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Dad, about Boris's...

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Sshh! I know, that boy is softer than a 1,000-year-old zombie.

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His transformation. Is there a choice?

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-A way to get out of becoming a vampire?

-Get out?

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Get out of becoming a vampire?

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Well, is there?

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-Well, I'm not going to lie to you, Vladdy.

-Good.

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-Cos I can tell when you're lying. Your eyes glow yellow.

-Do they?

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-Really?

-Yeah.

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Well, I never knew that.

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That's the trouble with having no reflection.

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Anyway, you were saying?

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I was saying...being a vampire is your destiny

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and nothing you can do will ever change that.

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-Is that clear?

-Totally.

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Just one question.

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-Mmm?

-Why are your eyes shut?

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Sick again, Master Boris?!

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Nice bit of rat in cockroach sauce will soon have you feeling better.

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Ah!

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Master Boris?

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Boris!

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Blood... I need blood...

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But seriously, Renfield's?

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That's the last time you get breakfast in bed!

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That is so...

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eeww.

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Don't give up. I think there's a way out of becoming vampires.

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You're serious? How?

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I don't know yet, but we're going to find a way.

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Right, what have you done with my stuff?

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-I don't know what you're talking about.

-My sunglasses and nail polish.

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Relax, they're over there.

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-Prepare to enter a world of pain.

-Umm, I'll take a rain-check.

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Because it's time for you to go to school like a good little breather.

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Don't ever call me that!

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Why? What are you going to do?

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You think you can challenge the Princess of Darkness?

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No, but I can whip your butt from here to Halloween.

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Huh! You're on, maggot muncher.

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OK, whoever commits the most evil deed by tonight is the winner.

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And the loser...

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has to sing and dance with Renfield...

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wearing a frilly pink dress.

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When do we start?

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Now.

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-What about school?

-School...is for breathers.

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So how can I help?

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-You really want to?

-Of course!

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If it'll stop your freakish cousin dribbling down my neck.

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-So what's the plan?

-Well, Boris is doing some research up at the castle

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and I'm gonna look on the internet.

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Shall I come to yours after school?

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You know you can't. It's too dangerous right now.

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Great, so until you and Boris find "a cure",

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-I'm stuck at home like a loser?

-Robin, this isn't about you!

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Fine. I'll just spend time with my other friends.

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Right.

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-I have got other friends, you know.

-Course you have. Course you have.

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Robin?

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Robin! Great.

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Ah, Agent Mole.

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Ready to debrief?

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So Vlad doesn't want to be a vampire and he's trying to find a cure?

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You're getting that "masterplan" look in your eyes again.

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-Correct, Jonno!

-My greatest plan yet, and it can't possibly fail.

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It's kind of our theme tune.

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And this is the final chorus!

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With Vlad's help,

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we can rid Stokely of its nasty vampire problem, forever.

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-This time there'll be no mistakes. I promise.

-You promise?

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I mean, no garlic gunge? No ponds?

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No totally rubbish female disguises?

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No, no, and I'm deeply hurt.

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Jonno, the time has come to show you my Secret Slayer's HQ!

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You've got a Secret Slayer's HQ?!

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Why didn't you mention this before?

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Can I trust you, Jonno?

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Course. Have I ever let you down?

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Jonno...put these on.

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-Do we really have to go through all this?

-'Fraid so, Jonno!

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The less you know, the less you can give away

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-when you're captured and tortured by vampires.

-Thanks, Dad.

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Please speak name...

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clearly.

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Eric Van Helsing.

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Voice recognised. Access granted.

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-Wow.

-I know. I've waited a long time for this moment.

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Oh! Garlic guns!

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Forget the guns. Behold our noble heritage!

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Who are these guys?

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My grandfather, Abraham Van Helsing III.

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And my father.

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Caught in the very act of slaying!

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-Look at that action.

-Dad, the plan?

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Patience. Now, this...

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is my great-great-great...

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or something... Aunt Porphyria.

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-Nice-looking woman.

-Yes, she was.

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She was also a slayer, a scientist and inventor!

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I want to show you the greatest secret of the Van Helsings.

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Is it some sort of super-weapon?

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An amphibious Slaymobile?

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Cool.

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-Books.

-Not just any books.

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Porphyria's finest work,

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A Painless Cure for Vampires. Only twenty copies were ever printed.

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Her secrets, her discoveries...

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They're all in here!

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She was locked up!

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She was a misunderstood genius.

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-Jonno, are you ready for your first solo mission?

-What do I have to do?

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I want you to take Robin Branagh...

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-out of play.

-You mean, kill him?

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Nothing so pleasant. I want you to make friends with him.

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-Why?

-To keep him away from Vlad.

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Divide and conquer!

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All right...and while I'm doing this, what are you going to do?

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We must have been through half the books in this place.

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Haven't you found anything yet, Zoltan?

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There's a chapter here on vampire cures,

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but I don't think you're going to like it.

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I'll try anything.

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"The surest and most effective cure for vampirism is..."

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Yes? Yes?!

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"A stake through the heart."

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Maybe not.

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Any other ideas?

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You could kill the person who made you a vampire.

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-I was born a vampire!

-So that would be your father...

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or the oldest member of the clan.

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Granny Dracula?

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No more hand-knitted capes for my birthday.

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-It's a win-win!

-Master Boris, that's grannycide!

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THUD!

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Mmm. "A Painless Cure for Vampires."

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Painless!

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This is it!

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Porphyria Van Helsing, whoever you are, I love you!

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"After many years as a slayer,

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"I have discovered that vampires can be cured by..."

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by...

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By what?

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Come on, come on...

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Master Boris! Control yourself!

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What are we gonna do now?

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-I suggest you talk to Van Helsing.

-But she must have died years ago.

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I was referring to Mr Van Helsing, the teacher from Vlad's school.

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You think they might be related?

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If blood-sucking doesn't work out,

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have you considered a career in rocket science?

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OK... I need to talk to Vlad.

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Is it me, or does this place smell of garlic?

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Plan B.

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Look, I'm sorry about before.

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I know you've got plenty of friends.

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Yeah? Name three.

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Well, there's me...there's Chloe...

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there's me...

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I'm sorry I got so wound up.

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It's just, well...

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the thing is,

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you are my only friend.

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You're like the only one I can really talk to.

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What are you doing here?

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I'm sorry, I'm so excited.

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Do you know what I mean? Vlad? Vlad?

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What is is his problem?

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You know what his problem is? He's a ruthless, blood-sucking monster.

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-Don't talk like that about my best mate.

-Best mate.

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Right.

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-"A Painless Cure for Vampires"!

-That's amazing! Where's the book?

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I got a little over-excited.

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-I kind of flamed it.

-Oh, Boris!

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But get this, it's written by a lady called Porphyria Van Helsing!

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-And Zoltan thinks that...

-Van Helsing knows something?

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OK, I know what to do.

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Boris, get back to the castle before you get the munchies again!

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You don't know anything about me or Vlad.

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I know this much.

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Vampires don't have friends.

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They only have victims.

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Vlad's different.

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Course he is.

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So, ready to see my evil deed, loser?

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Whatever.

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-What? What?

-Surprise!

-Aaarrrgghh!!!

-You've cleaned him up!

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Round one to me, I think.

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Oi! Tools are not for fools!

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Robin! I need your help.

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Robin?

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Oh, that's right, I exist!

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-Whenever you need a favour.

-Are you OK?

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-All right, Robin?

-All right, Jonno mate?

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I was wondering, do you wanna come round mine for tea later?

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What, to your caravan?

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Sure, I've got nothing better to do.

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-Have I?

-Robin...

-Hang on, are you inviting me round to yours?

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-You know I can't.

-Fine.

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I'd love to, mate.

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Oh, bum.

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I've hypnotised them.

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-They think they're eating spaghetti.

-Mmm.

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That is quite evil, but if you do this...

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-Hi, Ingrid.

-Hey, boys!

-What are we doing here?

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Why don't you take a look?

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I'm gonna be sick.

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Mmm...squirmy.

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You did this!

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You are evil!

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Aaarghhh!

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Temper, temper!

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Think. Get in his mind.

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I'm Van Helsing, I'm bald and I stink of garlic. Not bad.

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Let's hide all of Porphyria's secrets in here, Jonno...

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Ha ha ha.

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Yeessss!

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Yesss!

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Boris!

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Boris?

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In here, Vlad!

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What are you doing?

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Hiding from your dad. He's trying to make me bite rats for practice.

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-You found... you found another copy?

-Listen.

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"Every Vampire Family possesses a Blood Mirror.

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"This Mirror holds the power of the vampire clan.

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"For if the Mirror should break, every Vampire of the Blood

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"will return to his natural, mortal state."

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His natural, mortal state... Vlad, we've done it!

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-As soon as we smash that mirror. Come on!

-Vlad! A little help.

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-Oh, sorry!

-Thank you.

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Ah Zoltan, finally.

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Where does Dad keep the Blood Mirror?

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I can't tell you that.

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Your father would knock the stuffing out of me. I'd be a wolf-skin rug.

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There's a squeaky bat in it for you.

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There's a secret entrance through a coffin in the castle crypt.

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Aaaarrgghhh!!!

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You children spread everywhere,

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like mouldy verrucas. What are you doing?

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-We've found a secret passage, Renfield...

-Vlad!

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Do you want to have a look?

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Aaaarrggghhh!!!

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Let me out!!!

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Last one.

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This is it!

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Shouldn't you be practising your dance routine?

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Shut up and listen, coffin breath.

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I don't like you, and...

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well, I just don't like you.

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-But we have to work together against the boys.

-Sorry.

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Vampires don't do collaboration.

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If you don't help me, you'll never be a vampire.

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As if.

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Our zombie-brain brothers are trying to smash the Blood Mirror.

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-The what?

-Trust me.

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If they succeed, we'll all become mortal.

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So what's it to be?

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Start helping...

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or start breathing?

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-What's wrong?

-What if something's down here...

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something waiting for us...

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Come on, Boris. Let's just keep moving.

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Vlad! Help!

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Come on Boris, you can do this!

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Vlad, what's happening?

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It's a vampire castle now, it's protecting the Mirror.

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So it's trying to kill us?

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That's not fair! Let's go back.

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Come on Boris, we have to do this.

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But, slowly.

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Let me out!

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-Renfield!

-Where did the boys go?

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-Secret...passage.

-Thanks.

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If they've smashed that mirror, they're so dead! I mean undead.

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I mean, you know what I mean.

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Yesssss!

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I'm winning! I'm winning!

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Sorry. It's just I can never beat Vlad, he's really good.

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This two-player game is cool. Usually it's just me and my dad

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and he's not into things that are fun.

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At least he doesn't spend all his spare time blogging

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on www.blockeduptoilets.com.

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-My dad's a plumber.

-I knew that.

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Well, keep it to yourself.

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-Do you ever get jealous of orphans?

-Jonno!

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A word!

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What's the problem, Dad? I'm just gaining his trust like you told me!

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Well, don't get too close! All we have to do

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is keep Robin out of the way long enough for our plan to work!

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What plan?

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-What have you done to Vlad?

-Nothing. We're just trying to help him!

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You're slayers. Why would you help a vampire?

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Vlad needed a cure, and we knew the secret.

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What secret?

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OK. Inside Castle Dracula is a Blood Mirror.

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If it's destroyed, every vampire returns to its mortal state.

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We knew Vlad wouldn't trust us...

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So we planted a book, telling him what to do.

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He'll smash the mirror... no more vamps in Stokely. Everybody's happy.

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That's all right, then. Nice one, Mr Van Helsing.

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You're not even going to ask if there's a catch?

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-But you just said "everyone's happy".

-Think about it...

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When the mirror's destroyed, every vampire returns to its mortal state.

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Count Dracula's over 600 years old.

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Oh, for the love of garlic, Branagh. When the mirror gets smashed,

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the Count'll just be a pile of bones and ashes!

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You two are sick.

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I trusted you! You're a bigger psycho than your dad.

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-Robin!

-Let him go. Vlad found the book hours ago.

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It's probably all over.

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Dad, I'm not sure we've done the right thing.

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Nor am I, Jonno... Let's go and check he's definitely dead!

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Careful. We don't know what the castle's going to try next.

0:22:410:22:46

We've got to be ready for anything.

0:22:460:22:48

Vlad, look out!

0:22:480:22:50

Enough!

0:22:510:22:52

I am the Son and Heir of Count Dracula.

0:22:520:22:54

Show me where the Blood Mirror is!

0:22:540:22:56

Neat.

0:23:020:23:03

Let's go.

0:23:030:23:05

Where is everyone?

0:23:130:23:15

Try the crypt, Robin. It's very popular today.

0:23:150:23:19

Vlad!

0:23:190:23:20

That, brother,

0:23:260:23:28

-is checkm...

-Ssh.

0:23:280:23:30

Can you hear that?

0:23:310:23:33

What?

0:23:330:23:35

-The squeaking?

-No, no not that.

0:23:350:23:38

That.

0:23:380:23:40

-That.

-Let me out! Let me out!

0:23:400:23:44

It's just the offspring playing in the crypt.

0:23:440:23:47

Anyway, as I was saying... checkm...

0:23:480:23:52

It's no good! I can't concentrate with all this noise!

0:23:520:23:57

Let me out!

0:23:580:24:00

Stop all this garlic-awful noise immediately!

0:24:040:24:07

Master Vlad's going to smash the Blood Mirror!

0:24:070:24:09

Unfortunately, my Vladdy would never do a thing like that.

0:24:090:24:13

Uh, brother?

0:24:130:24:16

How naughty. I'm impressed! Still, I suppose we'd better stop him.

0:24:160:24:21

What are you doing?

0:24:210:24:23

I thought you'd shut me back in, like everyone else.

0:24:230:24:26

Oh, all right, if you insist.

0:24:260:24:28

Well, what are you waiting for?

0:24:320:24:34

I don't know.

0:24:340:24:36

Something doesn't feel right.

0:24:360:24:38

You are so weak, Vlad.

0:24:380:24:41

Everything you've ever wanted is right there in front of you...

0:24:410:24:45

you just don't have the guts to take it.

0:24:450:24:48

Vlad! Don't do it! You'll kill your dad!

0:24:510:24:54

-What? No, he'll just return to his mortal state.

-Exactly!

0:24:540:24:59

And he's 600 years old.

0:25:000:25:03

He'll crumble to dust?

0:25:030:25:06

I almost killed my own father.

0:25:070:25:10

Oh...

0:25:100:25:11

-now we're both gonna end up evil.

-Don't you understand?

0:25:110:25:15

If we kill our dads, we're more evil than any vampire.

0:25:150:25:18

Good point.

0:25:180:25:20

Vlad!

0:25:210:25:23

Boris! Olga! The other one! What's going on?

0:25:230:25:25

Hello, Daddy. And goodbye.

0:25:250:25:29

No, no!

0:25:300:25:31

You've... you've turned me into a breather!

0:25:350:25:37

-And I've killed your dad.

-Yeah, whatever.

0:25:370:25:40

Slain... by my own daughter!

0:25:400:25:43

-You're so grounded.

-Guess this means I win the bet, right?

0:25:430:25:47

You did this for a bet?

0:25:470:25:49

-That is evil.

-Thanks.

0:25:490:25:51

I can't help noticing, er, I haven't disintegrated.

0:25:510:25:55

-Speak for yourself - I'm falling apart.

-No, you're not, Dad.

0:25:550:25:59

Because you'd never miss the chance to become a vampire.

0:25:590:26:03

Where's the real Blood Mirror?

0:26:030:26:05

Well, done breather boy.

0:26:050:26:07

Ah, yes, I thought it was bigger.

0:26:130:26:17

You... you...

0:26:170:26:20

Princess of Darkness is the phrase you're looking for.

0:26:200:26:23

Speaking of which,

0:26:230:26:25

shouldn't you be getting changed around about now?

0:26:250:26:28

I can't believe the Count and his brother are still alive!

0:26:330:26:37

MUSIC STARTS

0:26:370:26:38

They might not survive this.

0:26:390:26:41

-# If you're ever down a well,

-ring my bell

0:26:420:26:45

-# If you're ever up a tree,

-just phone to me

0:26:470:26:51

# And if you're ever lose your teeth and you're out to dine

0:26:510:26:58

# Borrow mine

0:26:580:26:59

# It's friendship, friendship just the perfect blendship

0:26:590:27:06

# When other friendships have been forgot, ours will still be hot.

0:27:060:27:12

# Friendship, friendship, just the perfect blendship

0:27:120:27:17

# When other friendships have been forgot, ours will still be hot. #

0:27:170:27:24

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:27:320:27:35

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