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I'm Deborah Meaden. I'm usually in Dragons' Den, | 0:00:07 | 0:00:10 | |
but today I'm in my own murder mystery. I've got no idea | 0:00:10 | 0:00:12 | |
who has been murdered, who the suspects are, | 0:00:12 | 0:00:14 | |
in fact, what's going to happen to me. | 0:00:14 | 0:00:16 | |
Um... So, wish me luck, I'm off to Successville. | 0:00:16 | 0:00:19 | |
This programme contains some strong language | 0:00:19 | 0:00:25 | |
'Welcome to Successville, | 0:00:25 | 0:00:27 | |
'a town full of celebrities. | 0:00:27 | 0:00:29 | |
'Sometimes the famous faces who live here break the law, | 0:00:29 | 0:00:33 | |
'and when they do, I'm here to take them down. | 0:00:33 | 0:00:38 | |
'I'm DI Sleet, homicide - lover, fighter, | 0:00:38 | 0:00:42 | |
'husband to an ex-wife, father to a bunch of weird looking kids | 0:00:42 | 0:00:46 | |
'and seafood enthusiast. | 0:00:46 | 0:00:49 | |
'Mmm, cockles.' | 0:00:49 | 0:00:50 | |
What the hell are you doing? | 0:01:12 | 0:01:13 | |
I was just having a cat wash, sir. | 0:01:13 | 0:01:15 | |
Cat wash? What's a cat wash? | 0:01:15 | 0:01:17 | |
Well, it's just where you haven't had chance to shower | 0:01:17 | 0:01:20 | |
so you get a wet wipe and clean the old nuts and bolts. | 0:01:20 | 0:01:23 | |
You look like shit. | 0:01:23 | 0:01:25 | |
Oh, is that a real rookie out there? | 0:01:26 | 0:01:28 | |
Yes, yes, of course. | 0:01:28 | 0:01:30 | |
Deborah, young lady, quick as you can inside... | 0:01:30 | 0:01:33 | |
and meet DI Sleet. | 0:01:33 | 0:01:35 | |
He'll be... You two can... | 0:01:35 | 0:01:37 | |
Uh-uh-uh-uh, take a seat, Ms Meaden. | 0:01:37 | 0:01:40 | |
HE BANGS DRAWERS Oh, Jesus! | 0:01:47 | 0:01:48 | |
I'm going to take you through a series of ink blots. | 0:01:48 | 0:01:51 | |
-That's a butterfly. -This isn't a butterfly, | 0:01:53 | 0:01:55 | |
this is a guy with no fingers. | 0:01:55 | 0:01:58 | |
-So it's a fingerless guy... -Yeah. -..with his... No, that's a butterfly. | 0:01:58 | 0:02:01 | |
It's not, it's a guy with no fingers. | 0:02:01 | 0:02:03 | |
Were you there, were you there when this was taken? | 0:02:03 | 0:02:05 | |
When you say that was taken, that's a photograph, is it? | 0:02:05 | 0:02:07 | |
Were you there when the ink blot was done? | 0:02:07 | 0:02:09 | |
That wasn't taken, that's an ink splot. | 0:02:09 | 0:02:11 | |
OK, Meaden, were you there when this was done? | 0:02:11 | 0:02:13 | |
-I wasn't. -I was there. | 0:02:13 | 0:02:15 | |
-I cut his fingers off. This is a guy's palms. -Oh. | 0:02:15 | 0:02:18 | |
-OK? -Yeah. | 0:02:19 | 0:02:21 | |
That's a...that's dancers. | 0:02:22 | 0:02:24 | |
-This is my cousin Alistair's penis and balls. -Oh. | 0:02:24 | 0:02:27 | |
Yeah, we covered it in ink when he was asleep one time, | 0:02:27 | 0:02:30 | |
-we just rubbed it on a bit of card. -Oh. | 0:02:30 | 0:02:31 | |
I don't... No, I'm pretty sure that's not how it works. | 0:02:31 | 0:02:35 | |
I don't...I don't think | 0:02:35 | 0:02:36 | |
when somebody shows you an ink blot you can get it wrong. | 0:02:36 | 0:02:38 | |
-Yes, you can. -It's not a right or wrong. -It's a guessing game. | 0:02:38 | 0:02:41 | |
-No, no, it's not a right or wrong, is it? -Meaden, here we go. | 0:02:41 | 0:02:44 | |
I'm going to throw you into the deep end cos I... | 0:02:44 | 0:02:46 | |
you're such a know all, you know everything better than me. | 0:02:46 | 0:02:48 | |
How do you think you'd deal | 0:02:48 | 0:02:49 | |
if someone tried to jump off a building? | 0:02:49 | 0:02:52 | |
You'd talk them down. | 0:02:52 | 0:02:53 | |
Really? You think you can do that, do you? Yeah? | 0:02:53 | 0:02:56 | |
Let's see how good Deborah Meaden really is. | 0:02:56 | 0:02:59 | |
My name's Jane Horrocks, I'm a local beekeeper, down on my luck. | 0:03:01 | 0:03:05 | |
You've got to talk me down from a big building I'm going to | 0:03:05 | 0:03:07 | |
jump from. | 0:03:07 | 0:03:09 | |
Jane, get off the building now. | 0:03:09 | 0:03:11 | |
I can't go on like this! | 0:03:11 | 0:03:13 | |
-Now! -My bees farm! | 0:03:13 | 0:03:15 | |
How is you jumping off a building going to make your bees... | 0:03:15 | 0:03:19 | |
Cos no-one loves me! | 0:03:19 | 0:03:21 | |
How selfish, your bees love you, don't they? | 0:03:21 | 0:03:23 | |
No-one loves... No, they don't. They don't come to my farm any more. | 0:03:23 | 0:03:27 | |
So you're not a beekeeper? | 0:03:27 | 0:03:29 | |
-I used to be. -You used to be a beekeeper? | 0:03:29 | 0:03:31 | |
I used to... Meaden, don't be clever... | 0:03:31 | 0:03:34 | |
SHE GIGGLES | 0:03:34 | 0:03:35 | |
I'm doing it, I'm jumping, I'm going! | 0:03:35 | 0:03:38 | |
What the hell is going on-n-n-n?! | 0:03:38 | 0:03:41 | |
Argh, just a suicide exercise, sir. | 0:03:41 | 0:03:44 | |
Oh, fuck me, let him jump, yes, and let me get on with my day. | 0:03:44 | 0:03:48 | |
-That'll do, pig. -What? -We'll move on. -Did you just call me pig? | 0:03:48 | 0:03:52 | |
-It's just a police term, it's a bit of slang. -Oh, really. | 0:03:52 | 0:03:54 | |
-I didn't mean anything by it, it was just... -How we doing? Good? | 0:03:54 | 0:03:57 | |
-Yes, no, great. -Not really. -No? | 0:03:57 | 0:03:59 | |
-No. -Right. | 0:03:59 | 0:04:00 | |
-We haven't really, I haven't learnt anything yet. -No, well | 0:04:00 | 0:04:03 | |
-What do you... -That's not surprising, no-one does with him. | 0:04:03 | 0:04:06 | |
-OK. -He's absolutely useless. | 0:04:06 | 0:04:08 | |
Thanks, Meaden. | 0:04:08 | 0:04:09 | |
I suppose you're here to set us up with a murder, sir? | 0:04:09 | 0:04:11 | |
Afraid not. Erm, there's no homicide. | 0:04:11 | 0:04:14 | |
Well, what the hell are we supposed to do? | 0:04:14 | 0:04:16 | |
If you could, I'd like you to get your arse up to Marsden Grange, | 0:04:16 | 0:04:19 | |
-please. -Lady Gaga's place? | 0:04:19 | 0:04:21 | |
Well, clap, clap, fucking clap, Detective, yes. | 0:04:21 | 0:04:24 | |
Somebody apparently has broken in and cut Lady Gaga's topiary | 0:04:24 | 0:04:29 | |
hedges into giant cocks. | 0:04:29 | 0:04:30 | |
Quick as you can, get up there, and take Tinkerbell with you. | 0:04:30 | 0:04:33 | |
Sorry, did he just call me Tinkerbell? | 0:04:34 | 0:04:36 | |
What's wrong with the name Tinkerbell? | 0:04:36 | 0:04:38 | |
-It's not my name for a start. -What would you want to be called? | 0:04:38 | 0:04:41 | |
-Deborah would be good. -We'll call you Deborah... | 0:04:41 | 0:04:43 | |
-What would you like me to call you? -Sir. -Sir? | 0:04:43 | 0:04:45 | |
-I'll call you sir, you call me Deborah, I'll call you sir. -OK. | 0:04:45 | 0:04:48 | |
-Is it a deal? -Yeah, oh... | 0:04:48 | 0:04:50 | |
Argh! Yes, it's a deal! | 0:04:50 | 0:04:52 | |
Come on, let's go. | 0:04:52 | 0:04:54 | |
I suppose you want me to open the door for you? | 0:04:54 | 0:04:56 | |
-That would be lovely. -Maybe I should clean your shoes too? | 0:04:56 | 0:04:59 | |
Oh, now there's a good idea. | 0:04:59 | 0:05:01 | |
Grrr! | 0:05:01 | 0:05:02 | |
Marsden Grange. | 0:05:04 | 0:05:06 | |
The biggest pile in Successville. | 0:05:06 | 0:05:09 | |
Gaga's butler Jay Z showed us in. | 0:05:09 | 0:05:12 | |
-Hey yo, Lady Gaga, you have guests. -Oh! -Yeah! | 0:05:12 | 0:05:16 | |
Thank you, hello. | 0:05:17 | 0:05:19 | |
Well, I'm sure you know where their coats go by now. | 0:05:19 | 0:05:22 | |
Yeah. | 0:05:22 | 0:05:23 | |
No, that...that is not where the guests' coats go, | 0:05:23 | 0:05:25 | |
we've talked about this, remember? | 0:05:25 | 0:05:27 | |
It's all part of the... we...you... Thank you. | 0:05:27 | 0:05:30 | |
Hello, welcome, please do sit down. Welcome. | 0:05:30 | 0:05:33 | |
Thank you for your hospitality, Miss. | 0:05:33 | 0:05:35 | |
Not at all. Ah, what a pleasure to have guests. | 0:05:35 | 0:05:39 | |
HE LAUGHS | 0:05:39 | 0:05:41 | |
-I'm DI Sleet. -DI Sleet. | 0:05:41 | 0:05:43 | |
-From Murder Squad, Successville. -Wonderful. | 0:05:43 | 0:05:47 | |
This... | 0:05:47 | 0:05:48 | |
is my... | 0:05:48 | 0:05:50 | |
partner. | 0:05:50 | 0:05:52 | |
-(Introduce yourself.) -I'm Deborah, hi. | 0:05:52 | 0:05:54 | |
-Is she speaking? -Sorry, sorry, it's Deborah! | 0:05:54 | 0:05:57 | |
-Deborah? -Deborah. | 0:05:57 | 0:05:58 | |
Beautiful name. | 0:05:58 | 0:05:59 | |
We're here about the giant bush cocks. | 0:05:59 | 0:06:02 | |
Oh, the bush cocks in the garden, what a fiasco it's been. | 0:06:02 | 0:06:06 | |
-We were just saying, me and Deborah... -Yes. | 0:06:06 | 0:06:09 | |
..what a lovely home you have. | 0:06:09 | 0:06:11 | |
Oh, this old thing? | 0:06:11 | 0:06:12 | |
THEY LAUGH | 0:06:12 | 0:06:13 | |
This is only what I live in when I don't know where to live. | 0:06:13 | 0:06:16 | |
THEY LAUGH | 0:06:16 | 0:06:19 | |
(Any chance we could ask her some questions? Do you think?) | 0:06:19 | 0:06:22 | |
(Ah, well, we'll just let it... we'll give it a sec.) | 0:06:22 | 0:06:24 | |
SHE CHOKES | 0:06:24 | 0:06:27 | |
Is she all right? | 0:06:27 | 0:06:29 | |
Er... | 0:06:33 | 0:06:34 | |
Is... | 0:06:36 | 0:06:37 | |
Just as I thought, she's dead. | 0:06:53 | 0:06:55 | |
My money's on that soup. | 0:06:55 | 0:06:59 | |
-Lucky enough, I brought along my poison kit. -Oh. | 0:06:59 | 0:07:02 | |
Meaden, are you OK to take a sample from the... | 0:07:02 | 0:07:05 | |
Have a go... | 0:07:05 | 0:07:07 | |
Deborah Meaden. | 0:07:07 | 0:07:09 | |
Beautiful. | 0:07:11 | 0:07:13 | |
What are you doing? | 0:07:19 | 0:07:21 | |
Is that a good idea? | 0:07:21 | 0:07:23 | |
HE CHOKES | 0:07:23 | 0:07:25 | |
Er. | 0:07:25 | 0:07:27 | |
HE RETCHES | 0:07:27 | 0:07:28 | |
HE LAUGHS | 0:07:28 | 0:07:31 | |
Oh, don't, I thought you were going to make my day. | 0:07:31 | 0:07:33 | |
What's that supposed to mean? | 0:07:33 | 0:07:35 | |
No, I'm not, I'm joking. I'm warming to you. | 0:07:35 | 0:07:38 | |
That's very nice of you but, just as I assumed, | 0:07:38 | 0:07:42 | |
there's poison in this. | 0:07:42 | 0:07:44 | |
What we've got here is manchiboo powder. | 0:07:44 | 0:07:47 | |
Make a note of it. | 0:07:47 | 0:07:48 | |
There's only one place you can get this... | 0:07:48 | 0:07:51 | |
the Gallipogi Islands. | 0:07:51 | 0:07:53 | |
The Galapagos Islands? | 0:07:53 | 0:07:54 | |
-Yes. -The Galapagos Islands. | 0:07:56 | 0:07:57 | |
-That's it, the Galapagos Islands. -OK. | 0:07:57 | 0:07:59 | |
What do we have down there? | 0:07:59 | 0:08:02 | |
Well... | 0:08:02 | 0:08:04 | |
we actually have... | 0:08:04 | 0:08:06 | |
-What is that? -Oh, my goodness, we have a last will and testament | 0:08:08 | 0:08:12 | |
-of Lady Gaga. -Bingo. | 0:08:12 | 0:08:14 | |
Read it out. | 0:08:14 | 0:08:15 | |
"I hereby declare that my entire £5.8 million | 0:08:19 | 0:08:24 | |
"inheritance goes to my niece | 0:08:24 | 0:08:26 | |
"Lady Cheryl Fernandez-Versini". | 0:08:26 | 0:08:30 | |
Very interesting. | 0:08:30 | 0:08:32 | |
Listen, my sweet angel, | 0:08:32 | 0:08:34 | |
it's time these two little piggies | 0:08:34 | 0:08:36 | |
went to the market. | 0:08:36 | 0:08:39 | |
-Two things wrong with that. -What? | 0:08:39 | 0:08:40 | |
"Sweet angel", and "little piggies". | 0:08:40 | 0:08:42 | |
OK, what's your problem being called "sweet angel"? That's affectionate. | 0:08:42 | 0:08:46 | |
It's affectionate and ever so slightly patronising. | 0:08:46 | 0:08:49 | |
Come on, let's go. | 0:08:49 | 0:08:51 | |
You're turning out to be quite a pain in the behind at times, Meaden. | 0:08:51 | 0:08:54 | |
'Bingo! A good old-fashioned murder mystery | 0:08:54 | 0:08:57 | |
'with all the suspects under one roof. | 0:08:57 | 0:09:01 | |
'First up, Gaga's live-in niece, | 0:09:01 | 0:09:03 | |
'Lady Cheryl Veranda-Pernini.' | 0:09:03 | 0:09:06 | |
LAUGHTER | 0:09:07 | 0:09:09 | |
Wow! You want to see what's coming down the stairs. | 0:09:12 | 0:09:15 | |
-What? -She looks good. | 0:09:15 | 0:09:17 | |
It doesn't matter what she looks like. | 0:09:17 | 0:09:21 | |
Don't make me get up, I've got a massive boner. | 0:09:21 | 0:09:23 | |
DI Sleet, I didn't know you was here. | 0:09:23 | 0:09:26 | |
Well...hello. | 0:09:28 | 0:09:30 | |
Pleasure. | 0:09:34 | 0:09:36 | |
This is... | 0:09:36 | 0:09:38 | |
my new partner, Deborah Meaden. | 0:09:38 | 0:09:40 | |
-Pleasure to meet you. -And you. | 0:09:40 | 0:09:43 | |
Well, so nice to see youse both, would you join us for some tea? | 0:09:43 | 0:09:46 | |
We'd love to. | 0:09:46 | 0:09:48 | |
Ah! | 0:09:50 | 0:09:52 | |
May I start by lowering the tone... | 0:09:52 | 0:09:56 | |
and offering my deepest | 0:09:56 | 0:09:58 | |
apologies about the murder of your | 0:09:58 | 0:10:00 | |
beautiful and luscious auntie? | 0:10:00 | 0:10:02 | |
She was just everything to us, you know what I mean? | 0:10:02 | 0:10:05 | |
She's been so much. | 0:10:05 | 0:10:07 | |
Oh, of course she has, get over here you. | 0:10:07 | 0:10:09 | |
-Have a little cry. -SHE SOBS | 0:10:09 | 0:10:12 | |
(Stop it! Stop it!) | 0:10:12 | 0:10:14 | |
-Oh, Sleet. -It's OK. -Oh, Sleet. | 0:10:14 | 0:10:17 | |
Cry now, cry. That's it. | 0:10:17 | 0:10:19 | |
I know exactly how you feel. | 0:10:19 | 0:10:22 | |
It's been really, really hard and I just, to be honest, I was | 0:10:22 | 0:10:26 | |
so happy when I found out DI Sleet was investigating. | 0:10:26 | 0:10:28 | |
So how do you know each other? | 0:10:28 | 0:10:30 | |
-Well, we met... -We met... | 0:10:30 | 0:10:32 | |
THEY LAUGH | 0:10:32 | 0:10:35 | |
It was such a long time ago. | 0:10:35 | 0:10:37 | |
-Oh, it was, but... -Just one second. | 0:10:37 | 0:10:40 | |
Oh, of course, I'll just look over here. | 0:10:40 | 0:10:42 | |
How do you know these people? | 0:10:44 | 0:10:45 | |
(Listen, Meaden, I have fancied Cheryl for quite some time, | 0:10:45 | 0:10:48 | |
(and I'm actually getting somewhere here...) | 0:10:48 | 0:10:50 | |
She is all over you for a reason. | 0:10:50 | 0:10:53 | |
-What's the reason? Cos she thinks I'm sexy. -No, no. | 0:10:53 | 0:10:56 | |
Sleet, I didn't realise that you was together with Deborah. | 0:10:56 | 0:11:00 | |
HE LAUGHS | 0:11:00 | 0:11:04 | |
Oh, no! | 0:11:07 | 0:11:08 | |
HE CONTINUES TO LAUGH | 0:11:08 | 0:11:10 | |
-We are not together. -Oh, I see. -We're not a couple. | 0:11:10 | 0:11:12 | |
I thought cos, like, a lovers' tiff. | 0:11:12 | 0:11:14 | |
Maybe if I was drunk. | 0:11:14 | 0:11:16 | |
Maybe if I was blind. | 0:11:17 | 0:11:19 | |
SHE LAUGHS | 0:11:19 | 0:11:21 | |
-No, you've misread that. -Cheryl. | 0:11:21 | 0:11:24 | |
Ah, please, call us Chezza. | 0:11:24 | 0:11:25 | |
-Oh, really? -Aye. -That's nice of you. -That's fine. | 0:11:25 | 0:11:28 | |
THEY LAUGH | 0:11:28 | 0:11:31 | |
Oh, someone's been working out. | 0:11:31 | 0:11:33 | |
Well, I like to pump iron. | 0:11:33 | 0:11:35 | |
-Ah, that's all you pump, is it? -HE LAUGHS | 0:11:35 | 0:11:38 | |
-You're cheeky. -Cheryl, have you been on holiday recently? | 0:11:38 | 0:11:41 | |
-Me? -Yeah. -Oh, no, I don't really travel, man, | 0:11:41 | 0:11:44 | |
don't have the time or the money, do you know what I mean? | 0:11:44 | 0:11:46 | |
I mean, I'd love to travel. | 0:11:46 | 0:11:48 | |
People always say, like, if you don't travel it's like living | 0:11:48 | 0:11:50 | |
life like a book that you haven't opened, and I guess it's | 0:11:50 | 0:11:54 | |
like reading the contents of a book but not getting past the first page. | 0:11:54 | 0:11:58 | |
Yeah, heard exactly what you said and I respect that. | 0:12:00 | 0:12:03 | |
What exactly did Cheryl just say? | 0:12:03 | 0:12:05 | |
She said something about travelling. | 0:12:05 | 0:12:07 | |
So, have you seen Lady Gaga's will? | 0:12:07 | 0:12:10 | |
I just want to remember her for the beautiful woman that she was, | 0:12:10 | 0:12:13 | |
I didn't know anything about the will. | 0:12:13 | 0:12:15 | |
Forgive my friend, who's... | 0:12:15 | 0:12:17 | |
Who's the only sensible one in the room. | 0:12:17 | 0:12:19 | |
(Listen, you're talking to her like it's one of your friends.) | 0:12:19 | 0:12:22 | |
You need to get those rosy tinted glasses off your face | 0:12:22 | 0:12:25 | |
and ask her some questions. | 0:12:25 | 0:12:26 | |
She is a murder suspect. | 0:12:26 | 0:12:28 | |
OK, you want me to play tough, let's play tough. | 0:12:28 | 0:12:30 | |
-Read out the will. -All right. Hmm. | 0:12:30 | 0:12:33 | |
-Read it out. -Mmm-hmm. | 0:12:33 | 0:12:34 | |
But don't tell her I told you to do this. | 0:12:34 | 0:12:36 | |
I don't know if anyone's ever told you this, | 0:12:38 | 0:12:41 | |
-but you are simply delicious. -Ah, stop it, man. | 0:12:41 | 0:12:43 | |
"I hereby declare that my entire | 0:12:43 | 0:12:45 | |
"£5.8 million inheritance | 0:12:45 | 0:12:48 | |
"goes to... | 0:12:48 | 0:12:50 | |
-"my niece." -I'm so shocked, I had no idea, I thought | 0:12:50 | 0:12:53 | |
-she was going to leave it all to the butler. -Why the butler? | 0:12:53 | 0:12:56 | |
Well, he was so loyal to her, she loved him, man. | 0:12:56 | 0:12:58 | |
No, it's you who has won the dead woman lottery. | 0:12:58 | 0:13:01 | |
You have come up trumps. | 0:13:01 | 0:13:03 | |
We'd better be going, there's a... | 0:13:03 | 0:13:05 | |
I'm very tired, I'm so sorry, I... It's a really difficult time. | 0:13:05 | 0:13:07 | |
Will you need a hand getting into your bed? | 0:13:07 | 0:13:09 | |
No, she's absolutely fine. | 0:13:09 | 0:13:11 | |
I think I'll be OK. Tonight, I need to be alone. | 0:13:11 | 0:13:13 | |
But maybe tomorrow. | 0:13:13 | 0:13:15 | |
Well, I'll take that as a promise. | 0:13:15 | 0:13:18 | |
-Thank you for all your help in the case. -No... | 0:13:18 | 0:13:20 | |
you've both been absolutely amazing. | 0:13:20 | 0:13:22 | |
-It's a real pleasure to meet ya, Deborah. -That's lovely, thank you. | 0:13:22 | 0:13:24 | |
Thank you, the pleasure was all mine. | 0:13:24 | 0:13:27 | |
-Take care, Sleet. -Oh, you take care. | 0:13:33 | 0:13:35 | |
-Think of me. -Yes, we will. | 0:13:35 | 0:13:38 | |
-Did you want some buns? -Oh, they're for Deborah. -Oh, right. | 0:13:39 | 0:13:42 | |
If I don't feed her every couple of hours, she gets very tetchy. | 0:13:42 | 0:13:45 | |
It was very interesting, wasn't it? | 0:13:48 | 0:13:50 | |
Was it? Exactly what did you learn? | 0:13:50 | 0:13:51 | |
What I learned is this, Meaden. You... | 0:13:51 | 0:13:55 | |
can get very jealous. | 0:13:55 | 0:13:57 | |
SHE LAUGHS | 0:13:57 | 0:13:58 | |
As dusk fell, the murderer was still under this very roof. | 0:14:00 | 0:14:03 | |
We had to stay close, very close. | 0:14:03 | 0:14:06 | |
-Well. -Uh, Meaden, please, | 0:14:06 | 0:14:08 | |
would you indulge an old friend? | 0:14:08 | 0:14:10 | |
I'm not sure. | 0:14:11 | 0:14:12 | |
I don't mean anything perverse or naughty, | 0:14:12 | 0:14:15 | |
what I was meaning is, | 0:14:15 | 0:14:17 | |
have I ever told you about the last few | 0:14:17 | 0:14:20 | |
months of my marriage to my wife Helen? | 0:14:20 | 0:14:22 | |
N...no. BRRT! | 0:14:22 | 0:14:25 | |
Was that you, was that you or the bed? | 0:14:25 | 0:14:27 | |
-No, no, it was me! -Was it? | 0:14:27 | 0:14:29 | |
That was... SHE LAUGHS | 0:14:29 | 0:14:31 | |
Was that...that was you? Well, let's keep... | 0:14:31 | 0:14:34 | |
Yeah, well, that's it, that... | 0:14:34 | 0:14:36 | |
Let's leave the covers where they lay just for a little bit. | 0:14:36 | 0:14:39 | |
Let's let that thing work its way out down the bottom of the bed. | 0:14:39 | 0:14:42 | |
SHE LAUGHS | 0:14:42 | 0:14:44 | |
Anyway, the story. | 0:14:46 | 0:14:48 | |
Yes, back to the story. | 0:14:48 | 0:14:50 | |
Helen couldn't stand being with me any more. | 0:14:50 | 0:14:53 | |
I don't know why. | 0:14:53 | 0:14:55 | |
You know, I became homeless, I was living on a park bench. | 0:14:55 | 0:14:59 | |
And one day I was taking a shit next to a badger's hole. | 0:14:59 | 0:15:03 | |
This badger, he was | 0:15:03 | 0:15:05 | |
just sitting there, and I was... | 0:15:05 | 0:15:07 | |
I wiped my bum and I pulled up my pants, | 0:15:07 | 0:15:10 | |
and he looked at me and he said, | 0:15:10 | 0:15:12 | |
-IN AMERICAN ACCENT: -"What are you doing with your life?" | 0:15:12 | 0:15:15 | |
-Was he American? -Yeah, he was American. | 0:15:15 | 0:15:17 | |
-American badger. -Yep. | 0:15:17 | 0:15:19 | |
So I pulled up my socks and I went out there | 0:15:19 | 0:15:23 | |
and I got a job in the police, | 0:15:23 | 0:15:25 | |
and every day, I think about that badger. | 0:15:25 | 0:15:28 | |
So I went back to see him about three months back. | 0:15:28 | 0:15:32 | |
Guess what I found. | 0:15:32 | 0:15:33 | |
Some houses. | 0:15:35 | 0:15:36 | |
Someone had built houses on the badger's hole. | 0:15:36 | 0:15:39 | |
I then started really crying and then I smashed | 0:15:39 | 0:15:42 | |
some stuff in their garden and they called the police and I ran away. | 0:15:42 | 0:15:46 | |
Well, erm... | 0:15:48 | 0:15:50 | |
What... | 0:15:52 | 0:15:54 | |
Is that the end? | 0:15:54 | 0:15:56 | |
But, yeah, I mean, the end is, why won't anyone love me? | 0:15:56 | 0:16:00 | |
Are there any other bedrooms in this place? | 0:16:00 | 0:16:03 | |
-No, this is the only one. -But you normally sleep in a car, | 0:16:03 | 0:16:06 | |
are you not more comfortable not sleeping in a bed? | 0:16:06 | 0:16:08 | |
Well, I thought, how often do you get the chance to sleep in a bed? | 0:16:08 | 0:16:11 | |
And then I gave half of the bed to you. | 0:16:11 | 0:16:13 | |
Something I'm slightly regretting now, | 0:16:13 | 0:16:15 | |
since you've been sitting here farting. | 0:16:15 | 0:16:18 | |
No. That wasn't me, though, was it, really? | 0:16:20 | 0:16:23 | |
Yes, well, they who smelt it, dealt it. | 0:16:23 | 0:16:25 | |
-He who denied it, supplied it. -I didn't deny it, you just did. | 0:16:25 | 0:16:28 | |
You just turned me into a seven-year-old! | 0:16:28 | 0:16:29 | |
First of all you smelt it, then you denied it. | 0:16:29 | 0:16:32 | |
These are two bits of evidence that would suggest that you, | 0:16:32 | 0:16:35 | |
Deborah Meaden, were the one who farted... | 0:16:35 | 0:16:37 | |
Hold on a minute, hold on a minute. I am 55 years old. | 0:16:37 | 0:16:40 | |
And you're sitting in bed with a man... | 0:16:40 | 0:16:42 | |
I'm a grown-up and I can choose what I do with my life. | 0:16:42 | 0:16:46 | |
OK, Meaden, shall we try to get some sleep? | 0:16:46 | 0:16:49 | |
-Uh-uh. -Would you like to sing me a lullaby? | 0:16:49 | 0:16:51 | |
No. No, and to be fair, your story was pretty rubbish. | 0:16:51 | 0:16:56 | |
It ended with a dead badger on a housing estate | 0:16:56 | 0:16:59 | |
and you smashing things in other people's gardens. | 0:16:59 | 0:17:01 | |
Oh, well, so be it. | 0:17:01 | 0:17:03 | |
Well, Meaden, let's try and get some sleep. | 0:17:03 | 0:17:06 | |
OK. Have you got a spare pillow? | 0:17:06 | 0:17:08 | |
Oh, for crying out loud. | 0:17:08 | 0:17:09 | |
Just do that. | 0:17:11 | 0:17:13 | |
Thank you. | 0:17:13 | 0:17:14 | |
PHHFFFRRT! | 0:17:18 | 0:17:20 | |
-Oh, Meaden! -That was you! | 0:17:20 | 0:17:23 | |
'After a generous continental breakfast, we met our next suspect, | 0:17:25 | 0:17:29 | |
'Gaga's house guest, | 0:17:29 | 0:17:31 | |
'retired Scoutmaster Boris Johnson.' | 0:17:31 | 0:17:34 | |
Hello, Johnson. | 0:17:37 | 0:17:39 | |
So it's true what they're all saying - | 0:17:40 | 0:17:43 | |
she's dead, isn't she? | 0:17:43 | 0:17:45 | |
No, no, she's fine, she's never been in better health. | 0:17:45 | 0:17:48 | |
Lady Gaga is alive! | 0:17:48 | 0:17:50 | |
Oh, no, not Lady Gaga, she's as dead as disco. | 0:17:50 | 0:17:54 | |
I thought you meant Enid Pickles, | 0:17:54 | 0:17:56 | |
an old friend of mine who works at the Post Office. | 0:17:56 | 0:17:58 | |
An easy mistake to make. | 0:17:58 | 0:18:00 | |
Bloody, bloody, bloody hell! | 0:18:00 | 0:18:03 | |
One moment you think everything's terrific, | 0:18:03 | 0:18:07 | |
then something like this comes along and knocks you for bloody six. | 0:18:07 | 0:18:12 | |
I know, you senile old geezer. | 0:18:12 | 0:18:14 | |
-Oh, this, by the way, is Deborah Meaden. -Hello. | 0:18:14 | 0:18:17 | |
My new sidekick. Or call her Debbie or Debs if that's easier. | 0:18:17 | 0:18:21 | |
Deborah would be lovely, thank you. | 0:18:21 | 0:18:23 | |
What larks! | 0:18:23 | 0:18:25 | |
Did you used to be a Scout, like me? | 0:18:25 | 0:18:28 | |
Oh... Oh, so this is a Scout uniform? | 0:18:28 | 0:18:31 | |
-Yeah. -Ah, OK, I've never been a Scout, because I'm a girl. | 0:18:31 | 0:18:34 | |
-Oh, really? -Mmm. | 0:18:34 | 0:18:37 | |
Oh, oh. | 0:18:37 | 0:18:39 | |
Because I love being a Scout, cos you know, the adventure | 0:18:39 | 0:18:41 | |
and the, you know, the, er... | 0:18:41 | 0:18:45 | |
the, er...the woggle. | 0:18:45 | 0:18:48 | |
-The woggle, of course. -The woggle. The woggle. | 0:18:48 | 0:18:51 | |
All right, that's enough of the Kumbaya shit. | 0:18:51 | 0:18:53 | |
We're here about murder! | 0:18:53 | 0:18:56 | |
Oh, good. I thought the world of her, she was a terrific girl | 0:18:56 | 0:19:01 | |
and I suppose you ought to know, | 0:19:01 | 0:19:03 | |
I was going to ask her to marry me. | 0:19:03 | 0:19:06 | |
Oh, dammit! | 0:19:06 | 0:19:07 | |
This weekend, and I'm sure she would have said yes. | 0:19:07 | 0:19:11 | |
I don't know what to do, you know, with the grief. | 0:19:11 | 0:19:13 | |
If I was you, old friend, | 0:19:13 | 0:19:14 | |
I'd... I don't know, take a shit tonne of drugs, | 0:19:14 | 0:19:17 | |
cocaine, ketamine, might put a smile on your face. | 0:19:17 | 0:19:20 | |
That is the worst piece of advice I've heard for a grieving individual. | 0:19:20 | 0:19:23 | |
Meaden, shut up. | 0:19:23 | 0:19:25 | |
She's a cheeky little boy, isn't she? | 0:19:25 | 0:19:27 | |
Yes, she's a cheeky little fella. Thailand's a good place to go. | 0:19:27 | 0:19:30 | |
-But... -They're open minded. Have you been to Thailand? | 0:19:30 | 0:19:33 | |
Perhaps we could start asking about the murder? | 0:19:33 | 0:19:35 | |
Right, you... Who is running this operation? | 0:19:35 | 0:19:37 | |
-You are teaching me. -Oh, you want to learn? | 0:19:37 | 0:19:39 | |
-I'm looking, you are the detective. -OK, you want to learn. -You just... | 0:19:39 | 0:19:43 | |
Right, Johnson, had you and Gaga had sex before? | 0:19:43 | 0:19:45 | |
-We... Well, imaginary... -Had you had sex before? | 0:19:45 | 0:19:49 | |
-No, just... -Had you had sex before? | 0:19:49 | 0:19:51 | |
-No, we were just touching. -HAD YOU HAD SEX BEFORE? | 0:19:51 | 0:19:54 | |
-Touching outside clothes. -Had you done it? Had you made love? | 0:19:54 | 0:19:57 | |
-Have you had sex? -No. No. -Good. | 0:19:57 | 0:19:59 | |
-Write that - no, they didn't have sex. -No. | 0:19:59 | 0:20:01 | |
Meaden, take him for a walk. Please. | 0:20:02 | 0:20:04 | |
Would you mind giving me a quick push and then... | 0:20:04 | 0:20:06 | |
-Go on, Meaden, you can do it. -There's a good lad. | 0:20:06 | 0:20:09 | |
There's a good lad, just down there, there's a good boy. | 0:20:09 | 0:20:13 | |
Yes, good boy. | 0:20:13 | 0:20:15 | |
Girl. | 0:20:15 | 0:20:16 | |
-Boy. -Girl. | 0:20:16 | 0:20:18 | |
Boy. Stop! | 0:20:18 | 0:20:20 | |
Hey, look what I found in his bag. | 0:20:23 | 0:20:25 | |
Some ham and mustard sandwiches. | 0:20:25 | 0:20:27 | |
There's also some other interesting things. A letter. | 0:20:27 | 0:20:31 | |
-Oh, no, OK, hold on. -What the hell's this, what is this? | 0:20:31 | 0:20:34 | |
That's a monocle. | 0:20:34 | 0:20:36 | |
If it's got a prescription lens in it, it's bound to be... | 0:20:36 | 0:20:40 | |
Hold on a minute, you can't just take his stuff. | 0:20:40 | 0:20:43 | |
Oh, God! Oh, Jesus! | 0:20:44 | 0:20:48 | |
Read the letter, Meaden. | 0:20:48 | 0:20:50 | |
"My dear Colonel, I know you intend to ask for my hand. | 0:20:50 | 0:20:54 | |
"I implore you to resist that urge, | 0:20:54 | 0:20:58 | |
"for you will only be disappointed." | 0:20:58 | 0:21:00 | |
Well, looks like old Lady Gaga is what | 0:21:00 | 0:21:03 | |
we call in the police force a cock tease. | 0:21:03 | 0:21:07 | |
Do you honestly think he's interested in girls? | 0:21:07 | 0:21:09 | |
He doesn't seem to recognise a girl when he sees one. | 0:21:09 | 0:21:12 | |
I tell you what I think we should do. | 0:21:12 | 0:21:14 | |
We should return his items... Seriously, put that back. | 0:21:14 | 0:21:18 | |
OK. Get off me, Meaden! | 0:21:18 | 0:21:19 | |
-I'm serious! -Meaden, get off me. | 0:21:19 | 0:21:21 | |
-They're not yours. -Meaden! -They're not yours. -Come on. | 0:21:21 | 0:21:24 | |
-Where are they? They're going back. -Meaden! | 0:21:24 | 0:21:27 | |
Are you proud of yourself? | 0:21:31 | 0:21:33 | |
I am proud of myself. | 0:21:33 | 0:21:34 | |
'Like my bum, this case was getting hairy, | 0:21:34 | 0:21:36 | |
'and there were still two suspects to consider. | 0:21:36 | 0:21:38 | |
'The suspicious butler, watching our every move, | 0:21:38 | 0:21:41 | |
'and bedridden aunt Nicki Minaj.' | 0:21:41 | 0:21:43 | |
Look at this, it's some kind of sexy tomb. | 0:21:43 | 0:21:46 | |
Reminds me of my ex-wife. | 0:21:46 | 0:21:47 | |
Dusty, smoky and smelly. | 0:21:47 | 0:21:50 | |
What's this? | 0:21:53 | 0:21:54 | |
Have a look. | 0:21:54 | 0:21:56 | |
She asleep? | 0:21:56 | 0:21:57 | |
I don't know, asleep or dead. | 0:21:57 | 0:21:59 | |
"Get well soon." | 0:22:00 | 0:22:02 | |
OK, see if she's alive. | 0:22:02 | 0:22:04 | |
I checked Gaga, so it's your turn now. | 0:22:04 | 0:22:06 | |
OK. OK. | 0:22:06 | 0:22:08 | |
SHE SCREAMS Oh, my... Argh! | 0:22:09 | 0:22:11 | |
I'm so sorry. Who are you? | 0:22:11 | 0:22:14 | |
Why are you doing that when people here could have heart complaints? | 0:22:14 | 0:22:18 | |
-I'm so sorry. -What's wrong with you? -I can't remember. | 0:22:18 | 0:22:20 | |
I don't know, I haven't seen people for so long, are you real? | 0:22:20 | 0:22:23 | |
Yes, we're real. Take a seat, Meaden. | 0:22:23 | 0:22:26 | |
Oh, my goodness! | 0:22:26 | 0:22:27 | |
Wait there, give me five seconds... I actually think I've shit myself. | 0:22:27 | 0:22:30 | |
Don't talk to me about shitting myself, | 0:22:30 | 0:22:32 | |
I've been in bed for eight years. | 0:22:32 | 0:22:34 | |
-Oh, Christ. -Why are you here? | 0:22:34 | 0:22:36 | |
Because my crazy niece, Gaga, says I'm crazy myself, | 0:22:36 | 0:22:39 | |
so I've gotta stay down here, I've gotta do what Gaga says, | 0:22:39 | 0:22:43 | |
and I hate Gaga, I hate Gaga, I want to go away, | 0:22:43 | 0:22:45 | |
I want to come away with you, will you take me away? | 0:22:45 | 0:22:48 | |
Jay-Z says we can come and when he sorts out his passport, we gotta go. | 0:22:48 | 0:22:52 | |
What do you think's wrong with her? | 0:22:52 | 0:22:53 | |
I just wanted her to breathe. | 0:22:53 | 0:22:55 | |
Do you think she's having some sort of episode? | 0:22:55 | 0:22:57 | |
She is such a monster to me! | 0:22:57 | 0:22:59 | |
-She's a monster! -It's OK, it's OK. | 0:22:59 | 0:23:01 | |
-I hate Gaga! -It's OK... | 0:23:01 | 0:23:03 | |
I hate Gaga, no, I love Gaga, no, I hate her... | 0:23:03 | 0:23:06 | |
Nicki, Nicki! Chill out, Nicki! | 0:23:06 | 0:23:09 | |
Argh! Meaden, Meaden, Meaden! | 0:23:09 | 0:23:12 | |
Will you two stop mucking around? | 0:23:12 | 0:23:13 | |
We've got a murder mystery to solve here. | 0:23:13 | 0:23:16 | |
Meaden, Meaden, help! Help me, Meaden! Meaden! | 0:23:16 | 0:23:20 | |
Jesus Christ! | 0:23:21 | 0:23:23 | |
Oh, Meaden, Meaden! | 0:23:23 | 0:23:24 | |
Meaden, have you got a condom? | 0:23:24 | 0:23:27 | |
Meaden! Meaden! | 0:23:27 | 0:23:29 | |
Hey, yo, what the hell is going on here? | 0:23:29 | 0:23:31 | |
Sleet, get outta here. Miss Minaj, she needs her bed rest. | 0:23:31 | 0:23:34 | |
I'm not going anywhere. | 0:23:34 | 0:23:36 | |
-Oh! -Sorry, Meaden. | 0:23:36 | 0:23:38 | |
-You can come back any time. -Get off me! | 0:23:38 | 0:23:41 | |
So can you, Marie, it's been real. | 0:23:41 | 0:23:43 | |
Well, I think that was a dignified exit, don't you? | 0:23:49 | 0:23:51 | |
Shall we just take some of the evidence and go, shall we? | 0:23:51 | 0:23:54 | |
-It's been lovely meeting you. -Nice to see you, Marie. | 0:23:54 | 0:23:57 | |
It's been lovely, so lovely. | 0:23:57 | 0:23:58 | |
Next time, don't wait so long, you can come back any time. | 0:23:58 | 0:24:02 | |
You must be so proud. | 0:24:02 | 0:24:03 | |
What have I done? It was her, not me. | 0:24:03 | 0:24:06 | |
-You all right, baby? -I'm OK, Jay. | 0:24:06 | 0:24:09 | |
'After changing my underpants, I hatched a plan. | 0:24:09 | 0:24:13 | |
'I had Meaden drop a sleeping draught | 0:24:13 | 0:24:16 | |
'into the cup of the person she thought guilty of Gaga's murder.' | 0:24:16 | 0:24:20 | |
'This was it. Time for us to serve up | 0:24:20 | 0:24:22 | |
'some justice with milk and sugar - no going back now.' | 0:24:22 | 0:24:27 | |
GONG CLANGS | 0:24:29 | 0:24:30 | |
One of you murdered this lady. | 0:24:30 | 0:24:32 | |
So, was it the lovelorn old virgin | 0:24:34 | 0:24:38 | |
who was head over heels for Gaga? | 0:24:38 | 0:24:42 | |
Or is it her angelic, sexy, gorgeous niece? | 0:24:42 | 0:24:46 | |
Or was it Jay-Z, the suspicious butler? | 0:24:47 | 0:24:50 | |
Or was it Nicki Minaj, | 0:24:50 | 0:24:52 | |
the sex-mad hag? | 0:24:52 | 0:24:55 | |
Deb. Grab me and you | 0:24:55 | 0:24:56 | |
a couple of teas as well, please. Bring 'em here. | 0:24:56 | 0:24:59 | |
Deborah, can you get our cups of tea, please? | 0:25:01 | 0:25:03 | |
Absolutely. | 0:25:03 | 0:25:04 | |
Thank you very much, Your Highness(!) | 0:25:06 | 0:25:08 | |
Shall we have a lovely drinky poos before... | 0:25:12 | 0:25:15 | |
we find out who did it? | 0:25:15 | 0:25:17 | |
HE GAGS | 0:25:23 | 0:25:25 | |
HE COUGHS AND SPLUTTERS | 0:25:30 | 0:25:33 | |
Don't worry, everyone, | 0:25:37 | 0:25:39 | |
it's just a powerful sedative | 0:25:39 | 0:25:42 | |
that I use on dates. | 0:25:42 | 0:25:44 | |
I use it after I've made love to someone. | 0:25:44 | 0:25:47 | |
I have trouble getting to sleep after aggressive intercourse. | 0:25:47 | 0:25:50 | |
Somebody died here. | 0:25:50 | 0:25:52 | |
Yes, somebody has died here, Gaga, | 0:25:52 | 0:25:54 | |
and you believed that the man who killed her was Jay-Z? | 0:25:54 | 0:25:58 | |
-I do. -Do you want to explain why? | 0:25:58 | 0:26:01 | |
Well, you see, I thought it was Cheryl. | 0:26:01 | 0:26:03 | |
There were three pieces of paper, | 0:26:03 | 0:26:05 | |
two signatures matched on the Get Well card and the letter, | 0:26:05 | 0:26:10 | |
but I think that the two of you were having an affair. | 0:26:10 | 0:26:15 | |
I think that he was trying to get you out from your downstairs | 0:26:15 | 0:26:19 | |
dungeon and I think that you didn't need the money, | 0:26:19 | 0:26:22 | |
that was a complete, that was a set-up of Cheryl, because he was | 0:26:22 | 0:26:26 | |
the only person that was actually able to be in the room at the time. | 0:26:26 | 0:26:29 | |
He was up here and he dropped that will letter into that bag | 0:26:29 | 0:26:32 | |
over there to make it look like Lady Cheryl had done it. | 0:26:32 | 0:26:36 | |
Oh, what the fuck is going on? | 0:26:36 | 0:26:38 | |
Hey, Chief. | 0:26:38 | 0:26:40 | |
What's going on, what's that? | 0:26:40 | 0:26:41 | |
It's just a powerful sleeping sedative I use, called nightshade. | 0:26:41 | 0:26:47 | |
Not deadly nightshade? | 0:26:47 | 0:26:49 | |
That's exactly what I mean, sir. | 0:26:49 | 0:26:50 | |
Oh, fuck me. Are you stupid? | 0:26:50 | 0:26:53 | |
The clue is in the name, you pig dog! | 0:26:53 | 0:26:56 | |
-You just killed him! -Dammit. | 0:26:56 | 0:26:59 | |
Who administered the dose? | 0:26:59 | 0:27:01 | |
Oh, God! | 0:27:01 | 0:27:03 | |
-Meaden, sir. -No, no, to be fair... -Meaden, I think you'd already... | 0:27:03 | 0:27:07 | |
-Yeah... -Meaden, I said to go... | 0:27:07 | 0:27:08 | |
-Under your instruction... -Whoa, whoa, whoa! | 0:27:08 | 0:27:11 | |
I don't want to hear it! | 0:27:11 | 0:27:13 | |
I do not want to hear it, Meaden. | 0:27:13 | 0:27:15 | |
When I met you, yes, I thought to myself, | 0:27:15 | 0:27:18 | |
"Here, finally, is a rookie with a proper pair of bollocks," | 0:27:18 | 0:27:21 | |
but you've really disappointed me today. | 0:27:21 | 0:27:24 | |
The killer was Cheryl. Yes. | 0:27:24 | 0:27:27 | |
-Oh... -I'm afraid so. Why? | 0:27:27 | 0:27:30 | |
Because she was the only one who'd been travelling prior to the murder. | 0:27:30 | 0:27:33 | |
There was a photo of her in the Galapagos Islands on holiday. | 0:27:33 | 0:27:37 | |
Yes, the will was forged, | 0:27:37 | 0:27:40 | |
you were absolutely correct, but it was forged by Cheryl. | 0:27:40 | 0:27:45 | |
-Oh... -She was the beneficiary of Lady Gaga's fortune. | 0:27:46 | 0:27:49 | |
It stood to reason, you made it too complicated. | 0:27:49 | 0:27:53 | |
-It couldn't have been Jay-Z. -Why not? | 0:27:53 | 0:27:56 | |
Because Nicki Minaj told you that he didn't have a passport. | 0:27:56 | 0:28:00 | |
When he sorts out his passport, we're gonna go. | 0:28:00 | 0:28:02 | |
Therefore, he could never have travelled abroad | 0:28:02 | 0:28:05 | |
to get the poison which killed Lady Gaga. | 0:28:05 | 0:28:09 | |
You've just killed an innocent man. | 0:28:09 | 0:28:11 | |
Meaden, you're fired. | 0:28:11 | 0:28:14 | |
And for once, you're not the most stupid person in the room. | 0:28:14 | 0:28:17 | |
-HE CHUCKLES -Let's get out of here. | 0:28:17 | 0:28:20 | |
-Take her away! -Ah, that's... -Get off me, man, no! | 0:28:20 | 0:28:22 | |
Cheryl, I'll wait for you. | 0:28:22 | 0:28:23 | |
I'll come and see you in prison and we'll make love. | 0:28:23 | 0:28:26 | |
-You idiot! -I'm not the idiot, you killed him. | 0:28:26 | 0:28:29 | |
-OK, to be fair, I got this bit wrong... -Fine. | 0:28:29 | 0:28:33 | |
..but in the last moment, you and me, | 0:28:33 | 0:28:35 | |
what you call a sleeping draught actually turns out to be poison. | 0:28:35 | 0:28:39 | |
Meaden, it was an easy mistake to make, | 0:28:39 | 0:28:41 | |
-it doesn't say... -OK, who made the mistake? | 0:28:41 | 0:28:43 | |
-You did, you put the... -No, you did. | 0:28:43 | 0:28:45 | |
-Who put the poison... -You are my superior. | 0:28:45 | 0:28:47 | |
You should know more about this than I do. | 0:28:47 | 0:28:49 | |
If you'd killed Cheryl... | 0:28:49 | 0:28:51 | |
You should know the difference between poison and a sleeping drug | 0:28:51 | 0:28:53 | |
and I believed you when you said that. | 0:28:53 | 0:28:55 | |
OK, I'll hang for it... | 0:28:55 | 0:28:57 | |
-And -I -am the most stupid person in the room? | 0:28:57 | 0:28:59 | |
Yes, and I'm glad that you know you are. | 0:28:59 | 0:29:02 |