Travels with My Family Wonderland

Long car journeys with the family. We've all been here.

This is the story of four different trips made by four very different families.

I cannae wait for it. I'm so excited.

The Hennesseys are off to the Stan Laurel museum in Cumbria

to celebrate eldest son Liam's 16th birthday.

Is this a good birthday present?

It is, it's a brilliant birthday present, Daddy.

The Kimptons, who've been married nearly 30 years, are taking their annual holiday on a canal boat.

What made you want to go on a canal boat?

-I've just always wanted to do it.

-You've always wanted to do it?

-Yeah.

Josh, Daniel and Nathan are making an important trip to the Isle of Wight with their dad, Kerry.

Once we've scattered the ashes, there'll be one less thing to worry about doing.

Isn't that the main thing we need to do on the Isle of Wight?

Yeah, it's the most important thing we've got to do. We'll do it early so we're not thinking about it.

We've been thinking about it for such a long time now.

And Ian and his sister Alison are on their way to the Visitors' Centre at Leeds Prison.

We're definitely a lot closer now.

This has brought us a lot closer together.

Now that Mum's gone, it seems quite a coincidence that something else

-has brought us together and will keep us together.

-Yeah.

Strange things happen, don't they? I always say some things happen for a reason.

Yeah.

Dad's only cooked the easy things and Mum's cooked the hard things.

-Yeah.

-Well, that's a man's job.

-The easy things. To be lazy.

-Exactly.

It's just over a year since Kerry's sons moved in with him

and this is the first big summer trip they've taken since then.

A family...

People...that are related to you?

Is family doing things together and being together?

Oh, yeah.

-Like on The Simpsons?

-Yeah.

-Are we the Simpsons? D'oh!

-D'oh! Ronal-d'oh!

Do you think that maybe sometimes you're overprotective of Liam?

-Definitely. No, I really am.

-Why do you think that is?

I think it's just because of, you know, his condition, like with Asperger's and that.

-It's just...

-Hard.

-It is hard. It's just hard to sort of let go.

I still think of him as this little boy and want to do everything for him.

For Liam's dad, this is trip is more than a Laurel and Hardy pilgrimage.

It's also about his eldest son growing up and a chance to encourage the family to think about that.

I think for Liam to be more independent is everything.

-I know.

-He's not going to be with us forever.

He's going to want to venture out.

I think it's everything for him to be independent, do things on his own, go places that he wants to go to.

We can't take him places forever.

-I want him to be with us forever, though.

-But...

-I know.

He's got to be his own individual.

He's got to do it on his own, and I'd love to see him doing it on his own.

I think it's very important.

It is, but it's just that letting go. Just... You know what I mean?

You don't...

Why did you marry me?

I must have felt good when I was with you, that was why.

I mean, that must be it.

You wouldn't want to marry somebody that you don't like being with.

-What was it like compared to other girlfriends at the time? Do you remember that?

-Um...

Well, I know you treated me more nicely than, I think, all the other girlfriends I could remember.

-But then you didn't treat them very nicely, either.

-No, maybe not.

The first person that cared, anyway.

-Oh, really? Is that the only reason you married me, cos I was the first person who cared?

-No, no.

Cor blimey, after all these years, what I've just found out.

What attracts people is things that they don't know about. I think it was our lack of self-esteem.

I reckon that was the common factor.

No, I think on the surface level, it was probably that I was a quiet person, you were very loud.

You weren't attracted to loud people, you were embarrassed, so why would you have been interested in me?

-You don't know?

-No.

See, it doesn't make sense from that level because

you hated anyone putting their arm around you in public.

So you chose exactly the wrong person.

So it must have been something hidden. Maybe you thought you needed to be brought out of it.

I think you needed to be brought out of yourself and you saw someone who could do that.

I think it's the lack of self-esteem.

Things never turn out as you quite expect, do they?

Would you like to get married, Liam?

-No.

-Why?!

-I just don't want to get married. I don't want to have any kids.

What did you tell me was your ideal girl?

I was stupid and younger back then.

I don't want a wife cos some wives kind of nag you sometimes.

You've been watching.

They kind of hold you down.

If you did want one, what would your wife look like?

Someone that likes Doctor Who, someone that likes Coronation Street...

-Who has to have autism?

-No!

-Lewis, will you stop saying that, please.

Everybody... I don't know Asperger's - can you tell me?

Go on, then.

Well, I don't really know. It's something that children get.

It's a lot of boys get it, not girls.

You know, like, Liam sometimes has problems...

-Reading.

-That's one of them.

Socialising.

And there's the other thing. I'm brilliant at making friends,

but there's another thing that I'm like...

I can't control my temper.

-When you get married to someone, if you love them and you want to spend your life with them...

-Yeah.

Start a family.

I wonder who invented that?

Well, it's the natural thing, isn't it, falling in love?

Yeah, it's a natural thing, but I wonder who created weddings.

It's probably Adam and Eve.

-Adam and Eve?

-Yeah.

Did they have a wedding, then?

A wedding with insects.

Actually, it might have been the Greek idea.

-Do you think you'll ever get married?

-No.

I don't know.

-No.

-It's the future.

-Are you?

Don't know. You don't know, do you?

Well, when I was your age, I never wanted to get married, until I met Mum.

How long were you together?

30 something years, wasn't it?

-No! How old do you think I am?

-100.

-It was about ten years.

-Ten?

-Yeah.

Me and their mum were arguing a lot and we tried sorting things out, but it didn't work.

We decided that I would move out.

It was a mutual agreement between me and Mummy.

Apparently, one night, Dad walked out, I think it was, didn't you?

You got up, Josh, didn't you?

Oh, yeah. I heard you arguing.

The suitcase was at the bottom of the stairs and I pulled it up and put it under my bed.

-Did he?

-Yeah,

and Dad was looking for it.

Did he, Dad?

Probably, yeah.

I try and forget that night.

It weren't one of the better days of my life, I must admit.

Yeah. I can imagine.

It was very hard.

Going from seeing them every day to seeing them every two weeks, it's a big change.

-We spoke to you in the week, though, didn't we?

-Oh, yeah.

-Wednesdays.

Mummy wanted you to stay with her.

-It's the best place to be with Mummy cos I was working full-time.

-Yeah.

So you stayed in your own house, didn't you, rather than moving?

You used to have good fun with Mum, didn't you?

-When I used to phone up, you were always laughing with her.

-Yeah.

On the Isle of Wight.

-Were you taking the mickey out of me or something?

-Yeah. That was good fun.

Yeah, I'll bet. She was a good mum.

She looked after you well.

-Dad? Don't tell me off, yeah, but shall I tell you the start of one of Mum's favourite songs?

-What?

# I guess I just lost my husband I dunno where he went... #

Did she?

-Yeah, that's the start of the song.

-Oh, it's Pink, So What.

-Yeah.

I can remember, we were actually in the bedroom of the flat at Radlett

and I said, "I need to talk to you about something." Didn't I?

I said, "I don't want children," didn't I?

Changed my mind, and I said if you wanted to cancel getting married and go off, you were free to do so.

Hmm.

I don't think I consciously worried about mental illness in the family.

Because I hated my mum and hated myself, I'd have hated my own child.

How could they be nice when I was horrible? That kind of thing.

Although I know now that that's not the case,

I can't get rid of that feeling that any child of mine would have been horrible.

There is a drive inside people to have a children.

A very dangerous drive, if you ask me. I mean, there are

all sorts of reasons for people wanting children - some of them good, some of them not so good.

But whatever the drive is, it's something that's in us genetically, I think, and it needs to die away.

-Why do you think parents have children?

-To be happy.

So they can have a fully functional kind of family.

It's, like, to complete themselves.

You can be married and you can have your own house,

but without children, you're never a real family.

You really wanted the kids, didn't you? I was quite happy on my own,

just to be the two of us.

I never wanted it just to be the two of us.

Just to be the two of us.

-Hey!

-I was quite happy. Then Liam came along and...

-Brightened up our lives.

-And we felt he needed a brother.

You didn't want to have any more even after Liam.

-What? So you didn't want me?

-Course we wanted you.

-You twisted my arm.

-How could I twist it a third time?

Would you like a little daughter?

I'd love that. Too late now.

-No, it's not too late.

-It is too late.

When we get back to the house, maybe you two can have a snuggle

-and then maybe you can do that thing where you have the babies.

-Shhh!

You can have some sexy privacy time.

You two do the thing where you get the babies and they come out of woman's...you know.

Lewis, that's enough.

-Then you make the daughter.

-(Shut up.)

I wouldn't have allowed myself to have a child back then.

It didn't make any difference. I didn't want a child coming out of me.

How did you feel when I said that?

I probably assumed you would change your mind at some point.

You assumed I would change my mind? You cheeky devil. How dare you assume I would change my mind!

I changed my mind rather too late, though, didn't I?

And then we discovered it wasn't going to be that easy.

I was 36 at the time.

Ten years of trying.

I'd got to the point of, you know, we were going to have a life without children.

And then at work, somebody that I was friends with had taken what seemed to be

a very long holiday and I asked one of the other colleagues, where was Ian?

He said, "He and Liz have gone to the US to adopt a baby."

I'd no idea that you could adopt a child from another country.

-Especially not a baby.

-No. No.

You know, darling, we're really very lucky to have you.

You're a very special child.

All our friends would happily look after you for an afternoon.

A couple of them have said you're a peacemaker, you resolve problems.

You've just got such a wonderful personality.

I'm always surprised when you go shy occasionally, but generally, you're a very confident person.

You're just a lovely person.

That episode of where Laurel and Hardy were being chased

by the policemen and they went into Colonel Buckshot's.

Yes, and all of them became Captain Buckshot.

-Colonel Buckshot.

-Colonel Buckshot.

When the woman asked him, "Tell me, Agnes, how many rooms are there?"

"There is mine and the master's and the master's and mine, that is four."

And then she goes, "Oh, no, I'm still nervous."

So you can see how many times we've watched it.

I know! Loads. Yous watch the same ones over.

What was the first film they were in, Liam, together?

Em...Lucky Dog.

-Was that a silent?

-Yeah, it was a silent, Lucky Dog.

Stan played a scene with an actor whose name was Dave Hardy, but it would be nine years

before Stan and Dave would get together again as Laurel and Hardy.

How do you remember all this stuff, Liam?

Because I take it in, I listen to it, because, you see, I pay attention.

Believe it or not, I do, I pay attention to things.

Well, you'll never forget your mum, will you?

No.

You know when I didn't talk about it for quite a while?

I forgot her voice.

Did you?

-You forgot Mummy's voice?

-Yeah.

She used to burn our food, yeah, that was funny.

-Burn your food!

-Oh, when she used to catch the biggest crabs.

-Oh, yeah, then drop them.

Do you blame anyone for Mummy dying?

-Me?

-All of you?

-No.

-It was just cancer.

No, everyone we know near enough dies of liver cancer, don't they?

I think cancer is like

lots of little people

that jump onto you and then start, like...punching you and hurting you.

In the liver and all that.

-But...

-It depends where you get it.

You can get it anywhere, can't you, cancer?

Can you get it in your brain?

-Yeah, it's a tumour you get on your brain.

-Can you get it on your nails?

Only if you bite them, Nathan.

I've asked a few people, "If you found a cure for cancer, would you cure it?"

And they said yeah.

Well, they're always trying to find cures for cancer, aren't they?

But the only thing is, they would have a keep a bit of cancer

just in case there's another illness and cancer fights it off or something.

And that reminds me of the volcano, Mount Doom, in The Lord Of The Rings.

-Your birth partner's name was Connie.

-I was named after her.

Well, she had named you Hope,

so we called you Connie after her, but kept Hope as the middle name.

We went to talk to some councillor

who said that whoever the father or mother genetically is,

the children become like their parents because of behaviour and upbringing.

So I don't know...

I don't know what I think you've taken from us.

I think I've taken bad jokes from Daddy.

Possibly.

And irritating habits, like biting my nails, from you.

From me, sadly, yes.

And I also I want to dye my hair.

But that says you've got all the bad stuff.

No, that's just all I notice.

I made a big effort to socialise Connie.

And look where I've got.

-You know when we have fights, Lewis?

-Yeah.

When we get a wee bit fighty, I do wish that I was an only child, but...

You said that if you had one wish, you would wish that I was never born.

Well, that was actually when I was more younger and stupid, I was a stupid little...

You said that if you had a chance to wish on anything, you would wish I wasnae born.

No, but that was in the past, my wish now is for world peace.

But my mummy said to me, I have to keep wishing because it's never going to happen.

-Well, you never know, Liam.

-Careful now.

Don't strangle me, I'm telling you.

Every brother and sister have a fight.

-I used to always fight with my brother and sister.

-Did you?

-Aye.

-Did you ever wish that you were an only child?

-Sometimes, yeah.

-All the time?

-I wish that sometimes, mostly all the time.

Not now, I'm glad that I've got my sister and my brother now.

-You'll be the best of friends.

-Aye, good.

-When you're older.

-Cos you do.

After all these years of teasing me, you're glad you've got a sister now, aren't you?

Yeah. You see, you've always been a bit more posher than me, haven't you?

I don't think I'm posher than you.

No, I mean, lifestyle-wise, your lifestyle has been quite different.

-You upped sticks and moved from York to Manchester.

-I did, yeah.

To a totally different world type thing.

Ian and his sister Alison had barely seen each other for years

until Ian recently turned to Alison for help when his son was arrested.

Do you remember when you told me about all this, Ian, the first time you told me? We were at Mum's.

Oh, we were at Mum's, yeah, that's right.

And you said, "Oh, I've got another problem."

Yeah. I felt you had a right to know before anybody else because you were family.

-Mmm.

-Erm...

-And probably because we'd become close over the last few months.

-Yeah.

I needed to tell somebody what was going on,

and...you, being me sister,

were the person that I wanted to tell.

I couldn't tell anybody else before you, but I knew you would understand.

-Did you not think I might judge him and, erm...?

-No.

-Didn't you?

No, because you're not like that, are you?

When you told me, Ian, I... It...

You know when you hear something and it takes a second or two for it to sink in?

-Yeah.

-Well, it was one of those situations, but it was only very short-lived,

and I obviously made my mind up in that instant that I was go to be there to support you and Scott.

You don't...understand how much it means to Scott,

how much he appreciates that you do come and see him. It's, erm...

-You can tell by his face when you walk in.

-Yes.

The so-called friends that were going to come and see him every day

and haven't come to see him every day and that haven't even wrote to him...

-Really?

-They haven't even asked about him, you know, they...

That's all...all disappeared out of the window.

And you coming forward and saying, "Yeah, I'll come and see you..."

On a Friday, he looks forward to you coming through on a Friday.

He tells me, if I go to see him on a Wednesday.

"Oh, is Alison coming Friday?" I say yeah, "Oh, great."

He does, he understands, and he appreciates it so much.

I'd like to think he does.

Yeah, he does, yeah.

-Not for me, but for Scott.

-Yeah.

It's so important

that Scott feels...

-that he's got family here to support him.

-Oh, yeah, and he does.

He understands that...

the family is now pulling together, what's left of it, to help him, and that it's not just a one-off,

and that we're not these so-called friends that said,

"We'll come and see you and do this for you and that for you."

-It's his family that's stepped up to the mark for him.

-To step up and...

-Yeah.

-And I'm sure he'll tell you in his own little way that, you know...

I'm sure he will.

I would like to have a sister and a brother.

-AND a brother?

-Yeah.

-And what ages would they be in relation to you?

-They would be the same age as me.

-What? What, you'd like a ten-year-old brother and a ten-year-old sister?

-Yeah.

-Do you think that would work?

-Probably not.

-Probably not.

What do you think about having a brother or sister?

Erm... I'm 57 now,

and...I felt it would have been wrong

to have, you know, a younger child,

because...you know, if anything happens to me,

to my health or anything like that and I can't be a proper parent,

that would be a problem for the child that we took on.

Lewis, have you ever wished that you've had a disorder?

No, not at all.

I'm glad I'm just a normal healthy child.

Well, sometimes I kind of...

I'm shameful sometimes that my brother has autism,

but sometimes you're my brother and I love you.

It doesn't matter if you have autism or not, I still...

But you don't ever feel like

that I'm getting more attention than you, do you, Lewis?

That was when I was, like, five, seven, or something,

but now I'm nine and I don't feel that at all.

I feel like we're equal.

No, but Mummy loves us both equally.

Liam, when I turned eight, that's when I found out that we were equal.

-Are you proud of your autism?

-I'm not proud of it, I hate it.

It's the way you are, you should be proud of it.

No, well, I hate it.

I feel like sometimes I'm the older brother, because

sometimes when you're messing about, dancing like this...

sometimes I think... I say, "Liam, calm, calm..."

Sometimes I act like the older brother.

Do you, Lewis?

Yeah, sometimes you're looking after me when I'm in trouble or something,

or something's happened to me, you just go over and say, "It's OK, it's OK."

So sometimes you're the big brother, sometimes I'm the big brother.

I'm really worried sometimes that you might get hurt.

-Oh...

-Lewis, I worry about YOU.

Liam, sometimes you just go running off in front of us,

and sometimes we're worried that you might go over the road,

and we're still way back there and we might lose you,

so I'm worried about that.

Lewis, I worry about you even more, more than you about me, Lewis,

because every time I wake up in the morning, Lewis, I think

that something's happened to you,

that someone's took you out of your bed or something.

-So that's the way you feel about me, Lewis?

-I love you.

-Do you love me, Lewis?

-Yeah.

-I love you.

It must be two years, really, since I've had

-a real sort of father-to-son conversation with him.

-Mm-hm.

So that must have been difficult, going to see him for the first time.

-Very difficult.

-In the circumstances that you had to.

I didn't even know whether he would see me,

-but I was pleasantly surprised, I'll be honest, when he came out.

-Were you?

-Yeah. Oh, yeah.

-And how was that initial meeting?

It was hard on both parties. He...

It was hard for Scott, it was hard for me.

I wanted to just fling my arms around him,

give him a big hug and say, "Look, son, what have you done?"

He probably didn't want me to do it, but probably did, but felt...

He probably wanted it deep down.

Yeah, deep down, but probably didn't want...

You know, he might have got a bit embarrassed.

It was maybe the third or fourth time that I'd been to see Scott.

I said to him, "Why did you actually do it, Scott?

"Can you explain to me? Have you ever done anything like this before?"

He said, "I can't really explain why I did it, but all I can say is

"I do some stupid things sometimes when I get angry."

I said, "Do you find yourself getting angry?" He said, "Yes, often."

-I didn't know about that.

-Yeah.

I believe in openness. As far as possible.

With Connie it was obviously going to be the case

that we will have to tell her she was adopted.

Yeah, otherwise I would grow up and I'd think,

"It's a bit obvious, isn't it?"

People used to think I was your nanny or your granny because I was so old.

Because I could have been your nanny, I could have been your gran

because I could've had a child that married a black person.

When we walk down the street with Connie,

I think I was nervous in the first few days,

because I was worried if people would make some comment about her

being a different colour to us,

but I think after a few days or so, I completely forgot about it.

Then I thought to myself one day,

"I don't care, because we're a family

"and it doesn't matter what anybody else thinks."

It's because we look like a family now.

We look like we belong together.

Something has changed.

Something must've changed that's not conscious

but sub-conscious in the way we look together.

-It's magic.

-It is magic. A lot of human stuff is magic, really.

When we get to Compton Bay to scatter Mum's ashes,

what are we going to do?

-Have you got any ideas?

-No.

-Yeah.

Um...

Well, this isn't really an idea,

but shall I say my speech before or after we spread them?

-What, you're going to do a speech, then?

-Yeah.

-All right.

So, you're going to write down later what you think about it?

-Yeah.

-You did a speech at Mum's funeral, didn't you?

-Which was good.

-Made everyone cry, didn't you?

-Yeah.

-Is it something you feel you want to do?

-Yeah.

-It should be special, I think.

-A tribute to Mum, yeah.

-Yeah.

That's good.

Perhaps we could take some Fosters and pour some over it?

-Not on the flowers, but...

-On the ashes.

-Oh, right? Scatter the Fosters as well.

-Yeah.

-Carlsberg?

-Yeah.

-Which one did she drink the most?

-Fosters.

-Probably Fosters.

She drunk them the same, but Fosters was probably...

-No, she always used to drink Fosters.

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

-Right. OK.

Mummy's got to let go.

-You've never been out on your own.

-No, never been out on my own.

I've not really got that much confidence,

but I've got a little bit inside me.

I need a challenge so it can help me through the rough times

of, um, I guess, of what happens in the future with me.

-Make you more independent?

-Make me more independent,

make me more and more better at stuff that I need to do in the adult world.

-So you can do things for your own?

-I guess so.

I think we've to get you a bit more confidence, though.

-Then we can sort of build it up.

-Hmm-mm.

-Maybe even go a little further on the bus.

-Oh, no!

-No!

-I'm not going on any bus.

-No?

-No bus, Daddy.

What about one of us drives to a bus stop

and you go a couple of stops and we can meet you off?

No? There's a challenge!

I don't like them.

-What if we just send you to Glasgow and back.

-Yeah! Glasgow.

-No!

No, Liam. You have to learn to go on a bus on your own, though, some time, some point.

What do you think you'll do when you're older and you leave school?

I'll probably get driving lessons.

Yeah, and what are you going to do for a job

to earn money so you can look after Dad?

-I might be a policeman.

-Yeah?

-Yeah.

I would like to go into the army.

What would you want to do in the army, then, Dan?

Kill people.

Kill people?! That's not very nice, is it?

What about love and peace and all that?

-Dad?

-Yeah?

Is being a dad hard?

It can be at times. You can be hard work.

Nice, thanks.

It's enjoyable for most of the time.

Do you know what I'm having difficulty understanding, Ian,

is that why would somebody set fire to their own house

and then run out and leave it?

I'm finding it a real struggle to understand Scott's thinking.

I think Scott did intend for that to happen in some way, didn't he?

-Do you think he did?

-The way he's been speaking to me and you,

I would say that he probably intended it to happen.

Because he accepts...

..but not knowing that his mother was in the house.

I know they don't see eye-to-eye sometimes,

but I don't think he would do anything stupid like that.

He probably didn't even realise that she was in the house.

Where else would she be, though, Ian?

-I do wonder, like, about my mum.

-Which mum?

Very funny(!)

My burr...blah... My birth mum.

Because, like, obviously I don't know her,

but if I knew her, I wouldn't wonder.

So I wonder about like, hmm, let me think...

..like what she looks like,

if I have brothers and sisters, if I have another dad.

-Have you actually wondered about that?

-Yeah.

You've always told us you're not interested, which I find strange.

No, I'm not very interested in my birth dad.

Well, you might get to meet them one day, you never know.

-She says she doesn't want to.

-No, I don't.

..which I find odd, but that'll change.

No. If I don't want to, I don't have to.

He was telling that guy not to pull in and he did.

If I saw somebody walking down the street who's black and they stopped and they said,

"Oh, are you adopted?" because my mum and dad were white,

I would say yes and they would say, "Do you know who your mum was?"

I'd go, "Yeah." "Who is she?" I would go, "Connie."

What happens if she WAS Connie? It'd be like, "OK, this is strange."

What happens if she had her family with her and she hadn't told her husband or her children?

I mean, it could mess her whole life up. Her boyfriend walked out on her.

She lost her child. I mean...

It did ruin her life.

It did ruin her life, and I don't want to ruin it again.

The thing I would say, Connie,

if there ever came a time we were to find her,

we would not confront her anywhere. I think you'll still change your mind.

Well, let's see.

-It doesn't...

-We got six years.

No, we got more than that. You might never change your mind.

-I might never.

-But it's a strong possibility, let's put it that way.

Do you think Scott was surprised by his actions?

-Do you think it was just a one-off moment of madness or cry for help?

-Well, you know yourself

from the conversations we have had with him. I mean,

we both came to the same agreement, didn't we? That it was a cry for help.

-It's a very desperate cry for help, isn't it?

-Very, very desperate, yeah, but, I suppose...

..that was the one thing that I couldn't understand.

-Can't get to grips with.

-Why Scott turned out that way.

-Hmm.

Could you have done some more for him? Or could you have perhaps been there for him more

or do you think you've missed something with bringing him up, or...?

I still say I did the best I could. Obviously, if I could have done more,

-I would have done more.

-Of course, yeah.

It is maybe a cry for help.

You know, maybe I have missed something that I can't see.

Maybe Scott does want something else.

-But I only did what I could to the best of my capabilities.

-Yes.

(BOTH SING) # Bow chika bow wow That's what my baby says

# Bow wow wow and my heart starts pumping

# Chiki chiki choo-waa

# Never gonna say, gitchi gitchi goo means that I love you

# Baby! A ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba

# Gitchi gitchi goo means that I love you. #

They're really good boys.

I've always been proud of you.

Even if...

-..we're naughty?

-Yeah, but that's different, innit?

Cos you're not naughty all the time, are you?

Even if we get a D in our school report?

-As long as you're doing your best, I don't mind.

-Cos I got some Ds.

-I used to at school. I wouldn't worry about it.

-I got some Ds, some Cs, and one A.

I got all As.

-I'm the brains.

-Mum was the brains of the family. Yeah.

-Yes.

Smarter than Dad.

DAD CHUCKLES

Dad?

I'm most proud of you because you looked after Mum.

Oh, good. That's nice.

You're the most caring and the most loving parents in the entire world

-and you never give up on me.

-Oh, Liam.

-You bring happiness to my life and all.

-You're the most beautiful, most kindest...

-Thank you.

-..most loving and most generous...

-Not quite, Liam!

I love you to bits. You're the ultimate parents in the entire world.

-You're the best mum and dad in the entire universe, even. In the cosmos of all time and space.

-Not quite!

-Lewis, you're not saying much!

-Yeah.

-Do you not agree?

-Not very much. You're good parents.

-Thank you.

I wouldn't say the best in the cosmos.

What do you think makes a perfect parent, then?

Good love. Loving them and making sure that they're safe.

And not being overprotective. Letting them go when they're ready.

That's what being a parent is all about.

Making decisions for them and making sure that when they're ready to go off

and do the big things in the world... You need to let them go.

Thank you, Liam. Thank you.

-At the end of the day, I'm still his dad.

-You're there for him. Yes.

I told him that the first time I went in, I said,

"Look, son, we might not have seen each other for quite a while,

-"but I'm still your dad and I'm still here for you."

-Yeah.

If it had been me, me dad would have killed me. Me mum would have...

Well, she had have been heartbroken.

-Mum would have been heartbroken.

-To be honest, I don't think me mum would have told anybody.

-No, she wouldn't.

-She would have kept it to herself.

She would have probably been... That's probably why I am the way that I am.

Me dad would have gone... you know, blazing both barrels,

-"You've done this, you've done that."

-At you, he would. Yes.

-No, even if you had done it.

-Oh, yeah.

-Regardless of which one of us did it.

-When Dad said, "You do," you do.

-We did.

That guy was one heck of a dad.

-Did you know my heritage?

-No.

-Then why...?

-When you get offered a baby, you stop asking questions.

-OK.

It's like if you get offered free food, you just eat it.

I had always said I wanted to adopt a black child, hadn't I?

I had even tried going out with black men when I was younger.

When I joined Dateline it was all black.

Yeah.

I don't know what would have happened if they had offered us a white child.

That's what I was just thinking.

I really don't know, but I think I wanted black.

Are we there yet?

We got help keep the chalet clean as well.

-I'm not tidying up after you for two weeks.

-Room inspection.

Where are we?

-I worry what could possibly happen to him in Armley.

-Do you?

I do, yeah.

How long do you actually think he'll get?

Me, personally, I think he'll get between nine months and 18 months.

So when he comes out, what's going to happen?

Oh, I have no idea. I've spoken to Scott about it.

Scott has told me he basically wants to get away from the Leeds area...

and start afresh.

-A fresh start.

-Clean slate, fresh start.

-Hmm.

-New life.

Settle down. Hopefully, touch wood, things will work out for him.

Obviously, I'll give him as much help as I can.

Yeah, of course.

-Do you think you'll every get married, Lewis.

-Yeah.

-Nope!

-Who do you think?

-A blonde girl.

-A blonde girl?!

I don't want to get married.

With big...

-I think he wants a girl with big bosoms.

-No, don't say it!

Don't we all.

OK, what do you want your wife to really be like, Lewis?

Well, I want her to have blonde hair. Skinny, really skinny.

No make-up and I want her to have nice nails.

She can wear the make-up on special occasions like Christmas,

birthdays, Halloween.

Stuff like that.

Smooth skin, clean.

-Where did you decide mum had gone when she died?

-Heaven.

-Yeah.

God went, "I have the power."

I believe in God a little bit.

I think a lot of people believe in God

until something bad happens and it sort of puts you off.

Yeah, that's, yeah.

Everyone's got a soul, haven't they?

I don't know what a soul is.

Something on the bottom of your shoe.

Is it?

Oh, yeah, sole!

That's one sole.

Liam, have you thought of a challenge to do?

I'd like to go on my own down to the shops on me own,

but my mum's a wee bit nervous.

I'd go with you a couple of times.

-Mummy, are you OK with me going?

-No.

When Mummy dies, you can go to the shops on your own.

When Mummy dies.

Lewis, stop.

You're being silly, Lewis.

Well, not really.

If you don't like me to go on me own...

I know you have to, Liam.

When the time comes, you have to let me make my own decisions.

I think if you go down to the shops and maybe just buy a paper,

it's a big challenge for you.

Yes, but I have trouble with money, Daddy.

Yes, but I would go down a couple of times with you.

You want to do it as well, Liam.

Well, yes, I guess I'm wanting to do it, but I need to do it, though.

I need to do it. Another part of me is saying, "No, I cannae do it."

I dinnae care. I don't want to do it, but I have to.

-You feel you have to.

-I feel I have to.

I don't want to, but I feel I have to, so I am going to do it.

You need to be a bit more independent, don't you?

-That's probably my fault.

-I don't want to do it, but I need to.

I NEED to do it.

You've never done anything like that before.

I think it would be hard.

What if, like, someone came up and spoke to you, like a stranger?

I'd say, "I'm not allowed to speak to strangers."

Even if it's a nice woman, who says "I'll help you with those bags."

"Sorry, I'm not allowed to speak to strangers."

-So I think I'm all right with it, Mummy.

-Are you?

-I think I could do it.

-All right, we'll try that challenge.

-How long till we're at the, you know?

-I don't know.

-Another half an hour.

-Half an hour?!

I felt quite lucky where I've ended up.

If I think about it, I could've ended up in a childcare home

with no parents and I might have never got any parents.

I might have been growing up and I might be 23 with no parents.

I might have just grown up my whole life,

feeling like I've been rejected, if you get me?

It would never have happened to you, darling.

I think we all love you, don't you?

Now I've ended up in a nice home with nice people, a nice family.

Aren't you kind about us? We're nice, nice.

Here, sweetie.

Everything's been lucky. Like, I've just been really lucky.

-I think you turned out all right.

-Brilliant.

-You're generally pretty happy, aren't you?

-Generally.

Even if you do want more than you should really have.

I think that's true of every child in the world, yes.

If we find somewhere that we should go back to

that's not going to disappear,

then we can go back and put some flowers on, can't we?

Yes.

We'll never forget mummy, will we?

No.

-Let her out of that jar, there.

-She's probably bored in there.

It'll be nice to get it done and it's another door closed,

isn't it?

Something less we've got to do.

She can enjoy Compton Bay, then, can't she?

It's good to talk.

You get on with life, don't you? Get on with things,

the best you can.

I can just tell it's rough sea.

Thank you.

We're here!

-This is the canal we're going on.

-Is it?

-Yeah.

Let's hope Mum doesn't get seasick.

I don't know what the difference is.

Why they're called barges and why they're called narrow boats.

I think what it is, barges were used for moving cargo.

They use barges on the River Thames where they put rubbish in.

A narrow boat, you live in.

I think it's right that he's in there for what he's done.

-He admitted it, didn't he? He pleaded guilty.

-Yep.

I'll agree with the sentence, whatever it is.

-We have to turn right and go into that car park there.

-There it is!

Stan!

-There's Stan.

-Oh, look, it's Stan Laurel.

Brilliant.

I want to go back!

-That was Stan Laurel.

-He had on your hat.

I know and the statue is just around that corner.

It's Stan Laurel, we need to go back!

-Yeah, we'll go back.

-He turned around and this!

-He waved to you.

-I need to meet him.

-It's like his destiny.

Mummy, that is like destiny. Like Lewis said, that is destiny.

I think he saw your T-shirt and your hat.

KERRY: It's not the sort of topic you like to talk about, is it?

I don't like talking about death.

When someone dies, you have to talk about it

and deal with it, but it does make you think about your life

and what you're doing.

How you could improve it.

You've just got to live for the day,

you don't know what's around the corner, do you?

I'm starting to get a rash.

-You're getting a rash?

-Yeah.

-Right, does anyone want to carry Mum?

-Yeah!

-How heavy is it?

-Quite heavy.

-Cor, Mum! You're heavy!

Can I just carry her for a minute?

Do you want me to carry it?

They've come a long way. They still have moments of upset.

They just cope with things better than adults.

Put your backs to the wind, otherwise its...

Hold your breath, remember!

(SOBBING) Dear Mum in heaven,

me, Josh, Nathan, Dad and everybody else you know,

miss you and love you.

We're thinking of you all day and all night.

Lots of love everyone, from Daniel.

That's really good.

What we'll do before we go back,

we'll come up and put some flowers here.

Yeah? Yeah, we'll bring some flowers up before we go home.

Oh, this is nice !

Look at everything!

Oh, look over there!

-Hello.

-Hello, sir, you OK?

I mean, I just love it. I'm loving it.

And Ollie shouts, "Your money or your life!" "What?"

"Your money or your life!" "What?"

"Your money or your life!

"We're a couple of bandits. We're here to take your money!"

Right, which way?

I just thing he looks so well.

He does. He's got three weeks now.

Three weeks until sentencing?

-It's not easy visiting a member of your family in a prison.

Did you ever imagine you would be doing that?

-Never.

-No, I didn't either.

All right?

Right, that's a good thing done, isn't it?

Mummy saying, "Thank Christ you've let me out of that biscuit tin.

"Why has it taken so long?"

Wouldn't she?

Right, come on, then.

Shall we get another ice-cream or something?

You all right, Dan?

Good boy.

In the future, you're going to stay with Mummy and Daddy

until you're how old?

-25.

-I know what I'm going to do.

When I'm 18, I'm out the door!

-Well, thanks, Liam(!)

-When I'm 25, I'm staying with Mummy and Daddy.

Liam, that's only two weeks away.

You can't leave when you're 18.

Mummy, I am out of door.

-Go out for a paper at 16 and out the door at 18.

-Can I stay at the house as long as I want?

-Of course you can, Liam.

OK, here's my new plan, then. When I'm 30, I'm out the door!

OK, then.

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