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Episode 2

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In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit.

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You dirty, filthy beast! You horror!

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You're sacked.

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Why do people go to Mass, Father?

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They get something out of it, yeah?

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-Yeah.

-Well, I got this and this, and I got the sack.

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If I go tomorrow, what am I going to get - cystitis?

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It seems I've just been driving people deeper and deeper

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into poverty and despair.

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You know that lovely dress that you wanted? I'm going to get you that.

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I'm a betting shop manager who stole from her employer.

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What kind of chance does that give me?

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She's dead!

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You weren't even going to tell me!

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They'll call the police -

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first thing they'll do is check when her pension was last drawn.

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When was that?

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What do I do?

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This programme contains scenes which some viewers may find upsetting.

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MUSIC: I Think It's Going to Rain Today by Nina Simone

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# Broken windows in empty hallways

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# A pale dead mood in a sky streaked with grey

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# Human kindness is overflowing

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# And I think it's gonna rain today. #

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Right.

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KNOCKING

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-Hello, Michael.

-Hi, Andrew.

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Come in.

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She's upstairs, on the, er...up on the right.

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BEEPING

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Hiya, um, it's me. I'm...

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-It's just my sister.

-Oh, right.

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Um... I'm being arrested.

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Will you come and look after the kids?

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Thanks.

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The doctor thinks she's been dead for three or four days.

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Yeah, it's four days.

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Yeah, Christina...

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Well, she couldn't bring herself to report it until now.

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-She's not been thinking straight...

-Sorry, Michael, can you just...

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-just let her answer?

-Sorry, yeah.

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When was her pension last drawn, Christina?

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This morning.

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Was that you that did that?

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Yeah.

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For on the night he was betrayed, he himself took bread...

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..and giving you thanks he said the blessing,

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broke the bread and gave it to his disciples, saying,

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"Take this, all of you, and eat of it,

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"for this is my body which will be given up for you."

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BELL RINGS

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In a similar way, when supper was ended, he took the chalice,

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and, giving you thanks, he said the blessing and gave the chalice

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to his disciples saying, "Take this, all of you, and drink from it...

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"..for this is the chalice of my blood."

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SCREAMS ECHO

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"The blood of the new and eternal covenant...

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SCREAMS

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"..which will be poured out for you and for many,

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"for the forgiveness of sins.

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"Do this in memory of me."

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BELL RINGS

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MICHAEL SINGS: # Pardon me, boy

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# Is that the Chattanooga Choo Choo?

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# Track 29

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# Boy, you can give me a shine

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# You leave the Pennsylvania station 'bout a quarter to four

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WOMAN SINGS ALONG

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# Read a magazine and then you're in Baltimore

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# Dinner in the diner Nothing could be finer

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# Than to have your ham 'n' eggs in Carolina

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# When you hear the whistle blowin' eight to the bar

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# Then you know that Tennessee is not very far

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# Shovel all the coal in Gotta keep it rollin'

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# Woo, woo, Chattanooga there you are. Wooo! #

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Good, that!

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Are you OK?

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Yeah. Yeah.

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What is it?

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I'm scared there's no heaven.

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Death is just the end,

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and I'm scared of that end.

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To face that end, you should be at your strongest -

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but it comes when you're at your weakest.

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And I think that's a horrible joke for God to play on us.

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There's a heaven.

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And you'll be there.

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You and Dad.

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You think so?

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I know so.

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Give us The Little White Bull.

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Oh, right. Er...

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# Once upon a time there was a little white bull

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# A little white bull

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# Very sad because he was a little white bull... #

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When did you first know you were called to be a priest?

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Ah, it was one weekend, 39 years ago. I was 18.

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I'd turned my back on school and church and faith -

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with good reason, I'd have said back then,

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but...

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..I saw this falconer at work.

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His hawk disappeared...

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didn't come back.

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The crowd drifted away and there was just me and him...

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..and every half hour or so he'd call out,

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"Come on, boy," and then say to me, "He'll come."

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Total faith.

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And then, after...I don't know, maybe four, five hours...

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..he came.

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God doesn't always come when you call him...

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..but keep on calling, and he will.

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I was a Catholic again.

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Is there anything you'd like to say, Mrs Fitzsimmons,

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before we get to sentence?

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Um...

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Christina's asked me to say a few words, ma'am,

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if that's all right with you?

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Yes.

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I'm Father Michael Kerrigan and I'm Christina's parish priest.

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Um...

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You may not know this, ma'am - you may not believe this, ma'am -

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but social services are talking

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about taking Christina's kids away from her.

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Apparently, they had this mental image of...

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kids running round a dead body for days on end

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and nothing could be further from the truth.

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It's a cruel irony, ma'am,

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because Christina did what she did on account of those kids.

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Every penny she has ever earned she has spent on those kids.

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Everything she's ever done she's done because she loves those kids.

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Ma'am, I ask you to treat this wonderful woman

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with as much leniency as possible

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and to do all in your power

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to ensure that those children stay with the mother who loves them.

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Thank you.

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-WHISPERS:

-Thank you.

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WHISPERS: All right.

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I'll do all I can to help you with the children, Mrs Fitzsimmons.

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As regards this case,

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I'm going to grant you an absolute discharge

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on the count of preventing a lawful burial -

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but I cannot ignore the benefit fraud.

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On that count, I sentence you to six months in prison,

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but I will suspend it for a year.

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On both counts there are charges to pay

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and there's nothing I can do about those, I'm afraid.

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They amount to, um...

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£55.

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How will you pay it?

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Good question.

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Eh!

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Hiya!

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Hello!

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Hiya!

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Oh, I've missed you!

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Missed you, too.

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Come here! Ooh, look! Look what we've got!

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I just don't know how she could do it.

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Leave my mother lying dead, like that?

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And I know what you'll say.

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Father, I know.

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She did it for her kids.

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Doing such an awful thing, it just proves how much she loves her kids.

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The more awful the thing, the more she loves them.

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Well, that's bollocks, because I've got kids,

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and I love mine just as much as she loves hers

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and there is no way I would do that to my mother, and no shite, please.

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No "it's what she would have wanted" shite,

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because she wouldn't have wanted to be left like that.

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Yes, of course she'd want her to get her pension.

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She'd give those kids anything. She'd have given them her life!

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But, for God's sake,

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she'd want a little bit of respect after giving it.

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Christina?

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-So, there's no way you would do that to your mother?

-No way.

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If you had no money? Hungry mouths to feed?

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No way.

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Well, do you think she loves her less than you did?

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-Yeah.

-Yes.

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I couldn't do what she did,

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so, yeah, I think she loved her less than I did.

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What, even though she lived with her?

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SHE SCOFFS

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I wondered when that'd come up.

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She let our mam move in with her because it suited her.

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CHRISTINA SIGHS

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Free childcare, a couple of bob towards the rent.

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Yeah, Mam got something out of it and the kids kept her young,

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but she got plenty out of it, too.

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I'm going. I've paid Jimmy's dinner money up to the end of the week.

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Lisa's got athletics after school tomorrow. She's lost her kit.

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Thanks.

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Bye.

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DOOR CLOSES

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I'm sorry. Really sorry.

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You've started?

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Vernon's coming home.

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Is he well enough?

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We think so, yes.

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Vernon?

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Last time we met, you said how well he was doing.

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Yes.

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Yeah. Then why send him home?

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Precisely because he's done so well here. He's ready for it.

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Is it money?

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No.

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He's the least unwell.

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We've got somebody who's profoundly ill and we've got no bed for them.

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I mean, but..."least unwell"...

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..I mean, that doesn't mean "well".

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So, Vernon is still ill, yeah?

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Yeah.

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Then why send him home?

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We have to.

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But, Helen, she can't cope with him, physically.

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We have taken that into account when we've drawn up the care package.

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Shall we take a look at it?

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I'm ashamed of the way I reacted, Father.

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-No, no, not at all... I didn't think anything bad...

-No, I am.

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The head suggested uniform 15 years ago, the previous head,

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and they still all came in their frocks - as I knew they would.

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They want to dress up,

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and the poorer they are the more they want it -

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-their child a princess for the day.

-Yeah. Yeah.

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-So, I'll write to them.

-You don't need to do that.

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-I'll insist this time that they keep it simple. Plain and simple.

-Yeah.

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It's their child's first Holy Communion,

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-not My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding.

-Yeah.

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Hm.

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Am I too late?

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-For Confession? No.

-Yeah.

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Not what I expected.

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-No?

-No.

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I expected it dark.

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A wee little shaft of light.

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A few specks of dust spinning in it.

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You've not been for a while, then?

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No!

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Right.

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I'm Michael.

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Roz.

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How do you do, Roz?

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How do you do, Michael?

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Cat got your tongue?

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No. No, I'd just sooner listen for a while, you know?

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Christ is with us...

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..sharing our pain.

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This'll remind us of his presence.

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I'm going to kill myself, Michael.

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What? Why?

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Do I look good?

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Yeah. Yeah, you do.

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Ted Baker. Kurt Geiger.

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-Agent Provocateur knickers.

-Mm-hm.

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Chanel perfume.

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I want to make a good impression on the slab.

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Well, wh-why do you want to kill yourself?

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I'm an office manager, and...

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..over the past eight years I've stolen...

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..£232,648...

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..and in a week or two, for reasons I'll not bore you with,

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my boss is going to find out.

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What did you spend it on?

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Some of it was on me...

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..but I'm a gambler, and most of it went on machines.

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I know this trick.

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The silent trick.

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No, it's not a trick.

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I'm...genuinely lost for words.

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You could ask me how I'm going to do it.

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How are you going to do it?

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I thought about standing in front of a train...

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..or throwing myself off a high-rise block...

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but I'd look a right mess on the slab, wouldn't I?

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So it's pills and booze.

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When?

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Tonight.

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Do you have a family?

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SHE SIGHS

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It's a bit below the belt if you don't mind me saying so, Michael.

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I'm sorry.

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Two boys. 15 and 16...

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..and a girl, 19.

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Husband?

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You might call him a husband.

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I prefer "sick, twisted gobshite."

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Do you believe in God?

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I think it's about a thousand-to-one that there's an afterlife...

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..but it's the only chance I've got, so I'll take it, thanks very much.

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You get a lot like that, yeah?

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-Yeah.

-Hm.

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How do we start?

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Is it just, "Bless me, Father," and all that?

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If you like.

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OK, bless me, Father...

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SHE CLEARS HER THROAT

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..for I have sinned.

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God knows how long it's been since my last confession.

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I've had other men...

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.but only when I found out he was having other women.

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And I stole 230-odd something thousand off...

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my employer.

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Is that it?

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Yeah, well, there's other stuff!

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Nothing special, though.

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If this was Match Of The Day, that'd be the stuff you'd see -

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the men and the money.

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And are you sorry?

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Not about the men, no.

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As for the money, I'm...

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only sorry I got caught.

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It's not good enough, is it?

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No.

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I have to be truly sorry for you to absolve me, right?

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Well, I-I don't absolve you. It's God who...

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Please don't kill yourself.

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Thank you.

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If it's shame, you can live with the shame.

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Have you been there?

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Yeah. Yeah, I have.

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Were you suicidal?

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Yeah.

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Over?

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Things I did when I was a young man.

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Was it worse than stealing £232,000 or whatever

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off people that trusted you?

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Much worse. Much worse.

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How do you cope?

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I atone.

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I spend my life atoning for it, and I just hope that when I die,

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I'll...I'll have atoned enough.

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Promise me you won't kill yourself,

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promise me, and I will show you how to atone.

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I can't.

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Then promise me you won't kill yourself today,

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promise me you'll come back in two or three days' time

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and I will make you want to live.

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Promise?

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Yes, I promise.

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Will you join me in the Lord's Prayer?

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Yes. Yes, I will.

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Our Father, who art in Heaven

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Hallowed be thy name...

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-TOGETHER:

-Thy kingdom come

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Thy will be done on Earth as it is in heaven

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Give us this day our daily bread

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And forgive us our trespasses

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As we forgive those who trespass against us...

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DOORS SLAM CLOSED

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PHONE RINGS

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Hiya, Mam.

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'It's Beth. It's Mam's birthday!'

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-Ah.

-'Phone her on her landline, you prick.'

0:24:330:24:36

All right.

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DIALS

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RINGING

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'Hello?'

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-# Happy birthday to you. #

-'Oh!'

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# Happy birthday to you... #

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'I was beginning to think you'd forgotten!'

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Nah, I just haven't had the chance till now. How are you?

0:24:540:24:58

You all right?

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Yeah, I'm all right - just been very busy today.

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You having a nice time?

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# I only wanna be with you

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# I said no matter

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# No matter what you do

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# I only wanna be with you. #

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CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

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Come on!

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The Karaoke Kid!

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Anyway, still to come is the raffle,

0:25:280:25:31

and Father Michael is going to draw that for us

0:25:310:25:34

immediately...after the bingo!

0:25:340:25:36

Eight and six, 86...

0:25:380:25:43

All the twos, 22.

0:25:480:25:51

BEEP

0:26:130:26:14

'You have no messages in your mailbox.'

0:26:140:26:17

PHONE RINGS

0:26:190:26:21

'You've reached Father Michael Kerrigan.

0:26:280:26:31

'I can't get to the phone at the moment.

0:26:310:26:32

'If you'd like to leave a message and your phone number,

0:26:320:26:35

'I'll get back to you as soon as possible. Thanks.'

0:26:350:26:37

'It's Helen Oyenusi here, Father.

0:26:400:26:43

'You're probably fast asleep, so, never mind.

0:26:430:26:47

'It's just that Vernon wanted a word, didn't you, Vernon?

0:26:470:26:52

'If you play this in the morning, maybe you could phone him, Father.

0:26:540:26:58

'You know what he's like.

0:26:580:27:00

'Doesn't believe a word his mother tells him

0:27:000:27:02

'but everything you say is gospel.

0:27:020:27:04

'No pun intended, Father.'

0:27:040:27:06

DIALLING TONE

0:27:060:27:09

Phone him again.

0:27:280:27:30

He's in bed, Vernon.

0:27:300:27:32

He's not. They won't let him pick up the phone.

0:27:320:27:35

Who won't let him?

0:27:350:27:36

You know who.

0:27:360:27:37

Can I phone the crisis team, Vernon?

0:27:390:27:41

-No.

-You're holding a knife, Vernon, and I'm scared of what you might do.

0:27:410:27:44

-They're not coming in here.

-Not scared for myself.

0:27:440:27:46

-I know you won't hurt your mother...

-They're not coming in here.

0:27:460:27:49

-I'm scared of what...

-They're not coming in here!

0:27:490:27:51

-Don't phone!

-I have to. I won't let you hurt yourself.

0:27:510:27:54

Don't phone them.

0:27:540:27:55

Do not phone them!

0:27:550:27:58

Hello?

0:28:110:28:13

It's Helen Oyenusi here.

0:28:140:28:16

Hiya, Vernon.

0:28:380:28:40

-Go away.

-We just want to talk.

0:28:400:28:41

-I will not let you in.

-We're here to help you, Vernon.

0:28:410:28:44

-But I will do this before I let you in!

-We're here to help...

-Now go!

0:28:440:28:47

DIALLING

0:28:510:28:52

SIREN WAILS

0:29:040:29:06

-The police are coming, son, we have to let them in.

-No.

0:29:060:29:09

-We'll let them in and we'll let the crisis team in and they'll...

-No.

0:29:090:29:12

..give you something, everything will be fine.

0:29:120:29:14

-You're only feeling like this...

-No-one's coming in.

0:29:140:29:16

..because it's your first night

0:29:160:29:18

-away from the centre...

-No-one's coming in.

0:29:180:29:19

-No-one's coming in.

-Hey, Vernon, it's me. Andrew, Andrew Powell.

0:29:210:29:26

Go away.

0:29:260:29:28

What are you doing with the knife, Vernon?

0:29:280:29:30

I'm protecting myself.

0:29:300:29:33

There are people who want to do me harm,

0:29:330:29:34

so I'm protecting myself with this knife.

0:29:340:29:36

OK, OK.

0:29:360:29:37

I don't care.

0:29:370:29:38

I'm not going back in there and I'm not going to talk to them.

0:29:380:29:41

Just let me talk to him.

0:29:410:29:43

I'll see to it, all right, you got me word, all right?

0:29:430:29:45

No-one's going to harm you, you need put down the knife, mate.

0:29:450:29:48

-Open the door...

-I don't want to do it...

0:29:480:29:50

..let me in, I'll tell you what, we'll go through there,

0:29:500:29:52

-sit down nice and calm and talk it through.

-Let me go!

0:29:520:29:54

I'll see to it that no-one hurts you mate, all right?

0:29:540:29:56

-All you got to do...

-No!

-..is put the knife down,

0:29:560:29:58

-open the door for me...

-No.

0:29:580:30:00

We'll go through to your living room, sit down,

0:30:000:30:02

-talk about things nice and calm, like, yeah?

-No.

0:30:020:30:04

Is your mam there, Vernon?

0:30:050:30:07

-Yeah.

-Right.

0:30:070:30:08

-Put the knife down, please.

-Get out.

0:30:080:30:11

-Put it down.

-Get out now!

0:30:110:30:12

If you don't put the knife down, I will have to spray you.

0:30:120:30:15

No. No. Don't spray him, Dawn!

0:30:150:30:16

Get out of this house!

0:30:160:30:18

-Don't spray him, Dawn, he's sick!

-ALL SHOUT

0:30:180:30:20

Put the knife down, or I will have to spray you!

0:30:200:30:23

ALL TALK OVER EACH OTHER

0:30:230:30:26

Drop the knife!

0:30:270:30:29

I can't see!

0:30:320:30:34

Armed police!

0:30:340:30:36

I can't see!

0:30:360:30:37

Armed police. Put down the knife or I will fire!

0:30:370:30:40

I can't see!

0:30:400:30:43

Armed police! Put down the knife! Put down the knife or I will fire!

0:30:430:30:48

SCREAMING

0:30:500:30:52

You stupid bitch!

0:30:590:31:01

SHE SOBS

0:31:050:31:08

POLICE RADIO CHATTER

0:31:080:31:10

-SOBS:

-Vernon, Vernon!

0:31:190:31:21

SHE SOBS

0:31:210:31:23

In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit,

0:32:040:32:08

Amen.

0:32:080:32:09

The grace of Our Lord Jesus Christ and the love of God

0:32:090:32:13

and the Communion of the Holy Spirit be with you all.

0:32:130:32:16

Her daughter Christina is with us today

0:32:180:32:20

along with her beloved grandchild Lisa,

0:32:200:32:23

and we remember all of them in our prayers,

0:32:230:32:26

and, finally, we remember Vernon Oyenusi

0:32:260:32:29

who was so tragically taken from us last night...

0:32:290:32:33

-What?

-..and of...

0:32:330:32:34

You haven't heard, Father?

0:32:350:32:37

No.

0:32:390:32:40

..and we ask Almighty God to ease the grief of his mother,

0:32:420:32:46

Helen Oyenusi, whom many of us have known

0:32:460:32:49

since she first came here four or five years ago.

0:32:490:32:52

We remember all of them in our prayers.

0:32:520:32:55

How did it happen?

0:33:030:33:05

I don't know.

0:33:050:33:06

Well, where is she?

0:33:060:33:07

-His mother?

-Yeah, yeah!

0:33:070:33:09

Hospital. The General.

0:33:090:33:11

Is she hurt?

0:33:110:33:12

No. He's there.

0:33:120:33:15

The morgue.

0:33:150:33:17

What happened?

0:33:520:33:54

Oh! He got sicker and sicker. I-I phoned the crisis team.

0:33:540:33:59

He wouldn't let them in so they phoned the police

0:33:590:34:02

and the police gassed him and shot him.

0:34:020:34:04

Oh, God! Why didn't you phone me?

0:34:040:34:06

I knew you were in bed.

0:34:060:34:07

I'd phoned earlier and you didn't answer so I knew you were in bed.

0:34:070:34:11

They won't let me see him.

0:34:120:34:14

They say you can, but I can't.

0:34:140:34:18

Yeah...

0:34:180:34:19

All right, just... I won't be long.

0:34:200:34:23

I'm afraid not. Evidence.

0:34:530:34:56

Have mercy on Vernon Oyenusi, Lord.

0:35:080:35:10

Forgive him his sins and grant him eternal rest.

0:35:120:35:16

Amen.

0:35:180:35:19

God bless you, Vernon.

0:35:250:35:28

This lady's a police liaison officer.

0:35:450:35:48

I've told her I do not want one.

0:35:480:35:50

I will get all the help I need from my priest and my church.

0:35:500:35:53

The police have done enough for now, thank you very much.

0:35:530:35:57

Helen needs somewhere to sleep tonight.

0:35:580:36:01

We've still not finished with the house.

0:36:010:36:03

Oh, she can stay with me.

0:36:030:36:05

And the Chief Inspector has asked to see her.

0:36:060:36:09

Yeah, I'll-I'll come with her.

0:36:090:36:11

Thanks.

0:36:110:36:13

Bye, Helen.

0:36:130:36:14

Bye, Father.

0:36:170:36:19

Yeah, bye.

0:36:190:36:21

They let you see him?

0:36:290:36:31

Yeah.

0:36:310:36:32

He looks so peaceful, Helen.

0:36:360:36:39

We were happy in Granby.

0:36:520:36:53

Vernon loved it there.

0:36:550:36:57

Lots of friends, lots of laughter...

0:36:590:37:02

..but his dad wanted somewhere better,

0:37:060:37:11

and "somewhere better" meant fewer black faces...

0:37:110:37:15

..so we moved...

0:37:160:37:18

..here...

0:37:190:37:20

..and conversations suddenly stopped when Vernon got to them.

0:37:230:37:27

People laughed at jokes and wouldn't repeat them to him.

0:37:290:37:32

He got sick.

0:37:340:37:35

His dad couldn't cope with it.

0:37:370:37:39

The man responsible for the sickness couldn't cope with the sickness...

0:37:410:37:45

..so he left, and the sickness got worse...

0:37:470:37:51

..and worse.

0:37:530:37:54

Now it has killed him.

0:37:570:37:59

INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE

0:38:270:38:30

CHORAL SINGING

0:38:330:38:37

The body of Christ.

0:39:570:39:59

The body of Christ.

0:40:010:40:03

The body of Christ.

0:40:070:40:09

The body of Christ.

0:40:100:40:11

The body of Christ.

0:40:120:40:14

The body of Christ.

0:40:290:40:30

The body of Christ.

0:40:390:40:40

The body of Christ.

0:40:440:40:45

The body of Christ.

0:40:490:40:50

The body of Christ.

0:40:570:40:59

SHE WHISPERS

0:41:210:41:24

The body of Christ.

0:41:240:41:26

That way.

0:41:300:41:32

The body of Christ.

0:41:320:41:34

The children were a credit to you all.

0:41:350:41:37

Their appearance, obviously, er, but more importantly,

0:41:370:41:41

their behaviour throughout the entire Mass -

0:41:410:41:44

and finally, I have to mention one person

0:41:440:41:46

without whom today wouldn't have happened -

0:41:460:41:48

Miss Pickering.

0:41:480:41:50

Miss Pickering?

0:41:500:41:51

Lisa, would you?

0:41:520:41:54

Apparently, um, this is the 20th first Holy Communion celebration

0:41:570:42:04

that Miss Pickering's organised, so...

0:42:040:42:06

..Miss Pickering, on behalf of us all, thank you.

0:42:070:42:11

Thank you!

0:42:110:42:12

Helen will have questions, yes.

0:42:280:42:30

Why Vernon was discharged from the centre will be one of them,

0:42:300:42:33

I'm sure. As will why police shot dead a boy who wouldn't harm a fly.

0:42:330:42:38

The officer who used the spray says she did so

0:42:380:42:41

because she feared for Mrs Oyenusi's safety.

0:42:410:42:44

-As does...

-That's not true!

0:42:440:42:47

That is what she says, but of course, every statement,

0:42:470:42:49

every piece of evidence will be thoroughly tested...

0:42:490:42:52

HIS VOICE ECHOES AND FADES

0:42:520:42:55

When can I see him?

0:43:170:43:18

The post mortem's tomorrow. As soon as that's over.

0:43:180:43:21

Thanks.

0:43:290:43:30

What happened?

0:43:400:43:41

Policeman did it. That night.

0:43:410:43:43

Couldn't you have fixed the chain?

0:43:440:43:46

For God's sake! She's grieving, vulnerable, alone -

0:43:460:43:50

couldn't you have fixed the bloody...

0:43:500:43:52

I'm sorry.

0:44:060:44:07

Thanks for this.

0:44:170:44:19

You still off the sugar?

0:44:270:44:29

Yeah, four days now.

0:44:290:44:31

Puts the crucifixion into perspective, doesn't it?

0:44:330:44:36

So, what happened?

0:44:420:44:44

Oh, I got back late. Knackered...

0:44:450:44:49

and the phone rang.

0:44:490:44:51

Helen Oyenusi about Vernon.

0:44:510:44:54

I'd have picked up, but...

0:44:560:44:59

seeing them earlier in the day gave me an excuse not to,

0:44:590:45:03

so I didn't pick up,

0:45:030:45:05

and a few hours later he was dead.

0:45:050:45:08

And if you'd have picked up?

0:45:100:45:12

I don't know.

0:45:120:45:13

I might have spoken to him, you know, realised how bad he was,

0:45:130:45:19

gone galloping round there on my white charger and saved the day.

0:45:190:45:24

And you might not.

0:45:240:45:26

Yeah.

0:45:280:45:29

I just feel as though I should tell her, you know?

0:45:330:45:36

What good will that do?

0:45:390:45:40

Well, undeniably it will...

0:45:420:45:44

Look, she needs you, Michael.

0:45:490:45:51

And she needs to have total faith in you.

0:45:510:45:53

I mean, why would you destroy all that

0:45:530:45:55

just to clear your own conscience?

0:45:550:45:56

It's not that.

0:45:560:45:58

-No?

-No!

0:45:580:45:59

You lose a loved one suddenly, unnaturally,

0:46:000:46:04

you want to know everything, Peter.

0:46:040:46:06

Every detail.

0:46:060:46:07

People, oh, they... People try and hide it from you,

0:46:070:46:10

thinking it too painful, but how dare they?

0:46:100:46:12

You've lost a son - nothing can be worse than that.

0:46:120:46:18

And I'm going to be helping her in that quest, Peter.

0:46:180:46:21

The police, they'll tell her lies, we'll expose those lies.

0:46:210:46:25

"Total truth, please, officer"...

0:46:250:46:28

..and I can't do that

0:46:300:46:32

while I'm hiding an inconvenient truth of my own -

0:46:320:46:36

that, had I acted, her son might well still be alive.

0:46:360:46:39

I know.

0:46:420:46:43

Yeah, but...

0:46:480:46:49

..what she doesn't know won't hurt her.

0:46:510:46:53

'It's Helen Oyenusi here, Father.

0:47:010:47:03

'You're probably fast asleep, so, never mind.

0:47:040:47:08

'It's just that Vernon wanted a word, didn't you, Vernon?

0:47:090:47:15

'If you play this in the morning, maybe you could phone him, Father.

0:47:150:47:19

'You know what he's like.

0:47:190:47:21

'Doesn't believe a word his mother tells him

0:47:210:47:23

'but everything you say is gospel.

0:47:230:47:24

'No pun intended, Father.'

0:47:240:47:26

Hello again, Michael.

0:47:490:47:50

Hello again, Roz.

0:47:530:47:54

May I?

0:48:000:48:01

Yes.

0:48:010:48:02

How are you?

0:48:050:48:06

This is not my going away outfit so...

0:48:060:48:09

no immediate panic...

0:48:090:48:11

..but I'm still going to do it, I'm afraid.

0:48:130:48:15

When?

0:48:180:48:19

Soon.

0:48:210:48:22

All right, go on.

0:48:410:48:43

Sorry?

0:48:430:48:44

You said you'd give me a reason to go on living.

0:48:460:48:49

Well, if I said that, it...

0:48:500:48:52

-Well, you did.

-If I said that, it was arrogant of me, I'm sorry.

0:48:520:48:55

But I could suggest something.

0:48:580:49:00

Go on.

0:49:040:49:06

It'll take guts.

0:49:060:49:08

I've got guts.

0:49:080:49:10

You lost most of that money on the machines?

0:49:120:49:15

Yeah.

0:49:160:49:17

Those machines in the betting shop?

0:49:170:49:19

Yeah.

0:49:190:49:21

The more you lost the more you chased those losses?

0:49:210:49:24

Yes.

0:49:240:49:25

Tell the world.

0:49:250:49:27

What?

0:49:270:49:28

I want you to tell the world

0:49:280:49:29

what those machines have done to you, Roz.

0:49:290:49:31

I'm killing myself

0:49:310:49:33

because I'm afraid it's going to make the local paper

0:49:330:49:35

and you want me to tell the world?

0:49:350:49:36

Yeah.

0:49:360:49:38

There are four betting shops in Hallcross Road.

0:49:380:49:41

No bank, no post office, no chemist, but four betting shops.

0:49:420:49:47

Why? Why four, when everyone round there is skint?

0:49:470:49:50

Those machines, Roz, that's why. It's not just you, it's everyone.

0:49:510:49:55

You're not a criminal, you're not a villain - you're a victim.

0:49:570:50:01

I don't think my boss would see it that way.

0:50:050:50:07

Why did you steal that money? The machines. Who got that money?

0:50:070:50:12

The machines. Tell the world.

0:50:120:50:14

If you don't tell the world,

0:50:140:50:17

it's a guilty secret that's going to be revealed anyway.

0:50:170:50:20

If you do tell the world, it's a campaign,

0:50:200:50:22

and it's your reason for living.

0:50:220:50:24

I'll go to prison.

0:50:250:50:27

Not immediately, and not forever.

0:50:270:50:30

What did you do?

0:50:370:50:39

Others will come forward, Roz, with stories very similar to yours.

0:50:390:50:42

We'll get together, and we'll stick together

0:50:420:50:44

until there's not one machine left in Hallcross Road.

0:50:440:50:46

-What did you do?

-Promise me you'll think about it.

0:50:460:50:49

I promise. What did you do?

0:50:490:50:51

Promise me you won't do anything

0:50:510:50:52

until you've come back to see me again.

0:50:520:50:54

I promise.

0:50:540:50:56

What did you do, Michael?

0:50:590:51:01

I'm here to listen to you, Roz, not...

0:51:020:51:04

You said that you'd done something worse than...

0:51:060:51:12

..stealing £200,000.

0:51:150:51:18

What was it?

0:51:220:51:23

I've done two things worse than that.

0:51:260:51:30

One of them's too recent, too raw...

0:51:300:51:33

and, er...

0:51:330:51:35

And the other?

0:51:370:51:39

I, er...

0:51:410:51:43

Who do you think Jesus confided in?

0:51:430:51:47

Peter with the poker up his arse?

0:51:500:51:52

Judas?

0:51:540:51:56

No.

0:51:560:51:59

Mary Magdalene.

0:51:590:52:01

She'd been there, done it, bought the T-shirt. She understood.

0:52:010:52:06

I... I treated young women very badly.

0:52:080:52:11

When?

0:52:140:52:15

When I was 18, 19.

0:52:160:52:18

Not all young women, just the ones I had sex with.

0:52:200:52:22

Why?

0:52:220:52:24

Because they let me have sex with them.

0:52:240:52:26

It was 40 years ago and I could live with it then, but...

0:52:280:52:31

..40 years ago, the only good woman there'd ever been

0:52:320:52:35

was the Virgin Mary cos she'd never done it with anyone,

0:52:350:52:38

whereas if a girl did it with a boy, any boy,

0:52:380:52:40

well, she was filth, and if she did it with a boy like me,

0:52:400:52:47

a boy in whom every last bit of self-esteem

0:52:470:52:50

was well and truly banished,

0:52:500:52:53

well, she was less than filth -

0:52:530:52:54

she was scum, and you can treat scum any way you like.

0:52:540:52:57

Have you seen any of them since?

0:53:030:53:05

Oh, yeah, in here every day.

0:53:050:53:08

I sometimes think that I'll track them down and I'll apologise,

0:53:100:53:16

but I don't think I could...

0:53:160:53:18

or should.

0:53:180:53:20

Only you know the answer to that, Michael.

0:53:260:53:29

Do I?

0:53:310:53:32

Yes.

0:53:320:53:34

You should do what your conscience tells you to do.

0:53:390:53:42

SHE SCREAMS AND SOBS

0:54:090:54:12

CHURCH BELL RINGS

0:54:320:54:35

Hello, Helen.

0:54:550:54:56

-Hello.

-Father.

0:54:560:54:59

Trish is on her way.

0:54:590:55:00

OK, good.

0:55:000:55:02

Would you like to see what we've got?

0:55:020:55:04

Please.

0:55:040:55:06

This way.

0:55:060:55:07

This is, um, a log of every call, text and e-mail we got about Vernon.

0:55:190:55:24

Would you like it?

0:55:240:55:26

Yes, please.

0:55:260:55:27

There'll be more, but we'll pass them on, as well...

0:55:290:55:32

..and these are some photographs taken throughout his time with us.

0:55:340:55:39

On the wall, there's some of his...artwork.

0:55:540:55:59

I'm so, so sorry!

0:56:040:56:06

I am so, so sorry, Helen.

0:56:060:56:08

Please say you forgive me.

0:56:090:56:11

Oh, there's nothing to forgive -

0:56:110:56:13

you didn't want to send him away from here.

0:56:130:56:17

I'm here to say thank you, Trish.

0:56:170:56:20

Thank you for making him so happy.

0:56:200:56:22

He loved it here and that was down to you.

0:56:240:56:28

BOTH SOB

0:56:300:56:32

# Tell me what it's like in heaven

0:57:050:57:09

# I hope it's kinder than it is down here

0:57:090:57:14

# With all the trials and tribulations

0:57:140:57:19

# All the worry and living in fear

0:57:190:57:22

# Hallelujah

0:57:240:57:26

# Hallelujah

0:57:260:57:30

# We might be bruised but we're not broken. #

0:57:300:57:34

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