Lie to Me Casualty

Check Olivia's file, see how many times she has been injured.

Can we stop this please, Dixie?

Today I will see my real mum for the first time.

She has got Huntington's, Charlie.

I was thinking of going for the job, the promotion.

It's just I was looking for someone a bit more assertive.

-Of course.

-A disciplinary?

Nikki hurt that child, I am not apologising.

That means me, or...

Ethan...has got it.

Have you told him?

Heya! Hope you two will put your hands in your pockets?

Final countdown to target, folks.

Fancy it?

Nah.

-Come on, might be a laugh?

-Oh, come on, let's get going!

What else will you do, sit at home picking the fluff out of your belly button?

Are you implying I've got no life?

Not implying. I'm saying.

I've got plans for tonight, as it goes.

Yeah? Course you do(!)

OK, we have an RTC coming in, heavily pregnant woman,

minor injuries to the driver.

Cal, can you take this, or...?

Yeah, sure thing.

Keep an eye on your brother for me?

Hey. Is Cal OK?

I've no idea.

Right.

Have I done something to offend you?

No, why?

You just seem a bit off with me.

No!

No, not at all.

Hey, sexy, what you up to tonight?

No plans, why, what did you have in mind?

That's for me to know.

Oh. Man of mystery now?

Just waiting to be unravelled.

Surprise!

Happy birthday! It took Nikki three goes to get that right.

Yeah, all right! We've got some of your friends

coming over for a party later as well.

And... Thought we could do some dressing up,

maybe have an ice theme? Mummy could be a snowman.

Carrot for a nose? Cheers!

Can I be the Princess?

Of course you can! It's your birthday, you're the boss!

PHONE RINGS

You think you're up to this today?

Why wouldn't I be?

You still haven't told Ethan?

I'm going to.

He needs to be told!

And I said I'll tell him when I'm ready.

Right... When you're ready?

Meanwhile, I have to work with him.

I have to talk to him, knowing what I know.

This is Ethan's life as well.

You think I don't know that?

Maybe you're happy lying to your brother. I'm not.

Meaning?

Meaning tell him today.

Cos if you don't... I might have to.

Open that one.

I love it!

Ahhh!

I'm not one for pink sequins myself.

Shame.

If you dyed your hair blonde, you'd be a dead ringer for Dolly Parton.

I always fancied her.

Ah, you kept that under your hat!

Last one.

It's amazing!

I...thought you said we weren't going to...

It's all set up and ready to go.

-Thank you so much.

-You're welcome.

I'll be right back.

I'm going to try it on.

We said we weren't going to get it for her.

Please?

She's going to turn out to be a spoiled brat, is that what you want?

No, she won't. And please don't talk about her like that.

Why do I even bother? Eh? Why do I...

Owww!

Look what you made me do!

I didn't... I'll get a plaster. Sorry.

You stupid...!

I... Oh!

I need an ambulance, it's for my mummy, she's been hurt...

KNOCK AT DOOR

Olivia?

Hurry, please!

OK, Mrs Glavin RTC car vs bus at approximately 11.30 am.

Query left fib fracture, given Entonox and 5mg morphine...

Got any more? And I'm seven months gone.

In case you thought I was fat.

As if.

I'm Dr Knight, I'll be looking after you.

Right, here we are.

Cops are doing me, 60 quid and three points for bald tyres!

I knew we should've replaced them!

Yeah, well, they cost money!

Calm now, babe. Remember your exercises, yeah?

Inhale and... One, two, three, and out.

Bog off and "breathe" somewhere else!

Why don't we go and take a look at this cut for you,

she's in very good hands.

Yes. Take him. Please....

OK, have you got pain anywhere else?

I've got aches and pains all over

since Bruiser started pushing on my ribcage.

Once I've checked you over, we'll get you to X-ray.

Will the baby be OK?

If anything was to...

it's not one of them pathological fractures, is it?

There's no reason to think that.

Look, your injuries are consistent to what I'd expect.

And once we've checked you over,

we'll make sure the baby is OK as well.

I've got something in my eye.

Let's have a look.

OK, may be some glass in there.

Let's get that leg sorted first and then I'll take a look at that.

Could you take a look at my varicose veins while you're at it?

My legs look like Stilton in support tights.

Come on, Olivia, darling, it's time to come out now.

I found these in a drawer.

Don't touch it.

I don't know what position it's in.

What am I going to say to her?

I don't know, you, um, you lost your footing, you fell...

She's not stupid, she saw!

I'll talk to her.

Leave her.

You know I wouldn't harm her.

I adore you and Olivia...

..but you wind me up, and I lose it.

It was just a phone.

I know.

I have nothing left.

You and Olivia.

You're my whole world.

I love you. So much.

I love you too.

DOORBELL RINGS

Dixie?

Jess.

Right. Let me deal with this one, yeah?

We didn't call an ambulance.

I did.

Yeah. Nice closure. Well done, Lofty.

A compliment? Will wonders never cease?

You might get that promotion after all!

That's why she was asking about pathological fractures.

Who's that?

Mrs Glavin. She's got colo-rectal cancer, early stages.

And don't tell me, she's refusing treatment.

She's deferred it till after the birth.

Doctor. How is she?

She's being X-rayed right now.

Mr Glavin, it says Cheryl's booked in for a C-section

in five weeks' time.

No, that's an error. She's having a natural birth.

She's really healthy, fighting fit. It's been a perfect pregnancy.

My mistake.

Ah, there you are, Mr Glevin.

It's Glavin.

Glavin.

Another inch to the right and it would have gone in your lung.

That needs to come out in ED, I'm afraid, you need stitches.

Fell, you say?

Yeah. You know me. Bull in a china shop.

Don't explain yourself to her.

Don't they take complaints seriously any more? You shouldn't even be here.

What happened to your finger?

Oh, I was chopping peppers for this little lady's birthday tea.

That'll teach me for being a domestic goddess.

OK. Let's have a look?

-It's nothing.

-If you could just take the towel off for us.

So how'd you get that mark on your face?

She was draining some pasta for me.

Must've spilled some water on the floor.

And then slipped, hit the cabinet on the way down. Poor baby.

So we've got the posh products, the pamper day at the spa,

and the candlelit dinner for two at that nice new bistro

down the high street. We're going to make a bomb with that.

Face cream and a pizza? Big so what?

-And a spa day.

-Dunk in a little pool, who cares?

-I'd like to see you do better!

-Watch and learn, smuggo.

-What prizes you got, then?

-We are on it. Totally.

-That means none.

-We're going to wipe the floor with that lot.

-BOTH:

-Are we?

We are auctioning...

a date...with Lofty.

What?

What do you mean "date"?

So you fell backwards. Into a glass cabinet.

That's quite a thing, isn't it?

It was an accident.

I didn't suggest otherwise.

Although if I were you,

I might be making some changes to my domestic arrangements.

What's that supposed to mean?

Like you don't know.

You need to watch your mouth.

And you need locking up.

Stop it!

Nikki, isn't it? You're next of kin?

I need you to come and fill out some forms for me.

What forms?

Jess's details, standard stuff.

Can't I do them here?

Afraid not. And we can't treat her without them.

Besides, we need to get you checked out.

Where are they, then?

If you'd like to follow me.

I won't be long. I'll be back in a bit, all right?

Charming woman, isn't she, your partner?

What is it?

Mummy, I've had an accident.

Look, sorry, we need to do this here.

It's OK. I can take her.

You'll be all right with me, won't you, sweetheart?

Right.

I'm very sorry, I'm just looking for my patient.

Sorry.

Rita, where's my patient?

She's over there.

Ethan, I need you to keep her here as long as possible.

We're a little busy today, why?

Dixie thinks she's abusing her partner and the kid.

We need to play for time till the police and social worker get here.

Right. Yes, of course, sorry.

OK, erm...

Ms...Chisholm? Oh!

We've met before. You were here with... Olivia, wasn't it?

I've filled out Nurse Ratchet's stupid forms,

can I go back and see my family, please? There's nothing wrong with me!

Right, let's have a look at you first, shall we, please?

There we go, all nice and fresh.

So why didn't you go to the toilet? Did you forget?

Just, I do that sometimes.

Then I've got to run and find one. With my legs crossed.

It's not good.

Is it cos you didn't want to leave your mummy?

Did her and Nikki fight?

Want to go back now.

OK.

Want my mum.

You're worried about her, aren't you?

-You know, if there's anything you want to tell me...

-She said it was an accident.

You mean what happened in the flat?

Ollie?

She always says it is.

Dave doesn't know, does he, about the cancer?

Doesn't need to.

I'll have the baby, and then the chemo straight after.

He's your husband. You have to tell him.

No, I don't. And you mustn't either.

Now, the anaesthetic drops should have made it completely numb by now

so if you can stay as still as you can for me...

There we go.

Dr Knight? Promise me you won't say anything?

Yeah, OK.

Does it make me all rugged and sexy?

No.

I like you better soppy and fussing, anyway.

I'm sorry for snapping.

Just you concentrate on the baby, yeah? That's all that matters now.

Can we get the lights up, please?

Ollie? Ollie? Come here, darling.

Come on. Let's go and see your mummy, shall we, yeah?

She doesn't want to go with you.

-Since when?

-You tell me.

Have you been telling her I'm the Big Bad Wolf or something?

I don't have to.

Come on, darling. Let's get Mummy and go home, yeah?

No.

What?

Think she's made herself crystal, don't you?

-Where are you going?

-Not now, I...

-I need to dress this cut.

-I've told you, I don't want treatment. It's nothing!

-It's an open wound,

-it won't be nothing if it gets infected...

-I need to see Jess!

And I really must insist.

Thanks for sorting her out.

Does it hurt?

No. Not any more, nothing to get upset about, it was just an...

Accident? It always is, isn't it?

What have you said to her?

Nothing. But maybe there's something you want to tell your mum?

Sometimes we keep secrets

cos we think we're protecting someone we love.

But the only thing that can really help them is the truth.

So why don't you tell Mum what happened when you hurt your wrist?

Not this again?! You can't let go, can you?

You've really got it in for Nikki.

Your wrist that time, it wasn't Nikki that hurt you, was it?

Don't be sad, Mummy.

She says it's our fault when she hurts us...

but it isn't our fault.

I'm so sorry, Jess.

Why didn't you tell me?

We can't tell anyone cos it would make everyone feel really sad.

So...

But I don't want her to hurt you too.

She's not going to hurt either of us ever again. I promise.

SHE SOBS

OK. So, I'm the interviewer. Right? What are your personal strengths?

Er, I'm OK with people, punctual, most of the time...

That sounds really wet. You got to take charge.

Are you assertive in the workplace?

I can be, if, you want me to be, yeah.

Cooee!

Now's your chance. You tell him you don't want to do it.

And don't let him railroad you.

Jack, I know this whole charity thing is...

You are just like a furry little caterpillar

ready to burst into a beautiful butterfly.

And I am just the man to strip you of your cocoon.

Put yourself in my hands.

We'll give them some bang for their buck.

Good God, that was pathetic - got to get it together!

Dylan. You have to help me, Dylan, I can't handle this on my own!

-How?

-I don't want to be Jack's butterfly!

So I don't think she's going to tell him.

It's not the easiest news in the world to break, is it?

But he's going to find out eventually.

Putting it off is only going to make it worse, always does.

Oh, give it a rest, Charlie, please!

You need to keep this clean and dry.

I was right, that you were in before?

Yeah. With Ollie.

We were really stretched that day.

I'm not sure I gave you the best attention.

It can be difficult.

Least you're doing something that helps.

I often wonder.

Doctor Hardy.

Right, could you finish this off for me, please?

I won't be a second.

'It looks OK,'

but if it starts to hurt, let me know and I'll get you an eye patch.

I'd rather have a vodka Coke.

I can't help you there, I'm afraid.

You don't approve, do you? Me not telling.

Look, it's a little bit selfish.

Selfish?!

Times I have been desperate to tell him,

just to have someone to talk to about it, but I didn't.

They said I had to choose - the chemo, or...

SHE SOBS

Well, there was no choice.

This baby's all I've ever wanted. And I might not be there.

Her Christening, first Christmas, her birthday.

But to know her for a little bit, a year, a month...

Although keeping it to yourself like this...

We have waited so long for this baby, round after round of IVF.

Every month, more disappointment, more debt...

I'm sorry.

Then when it finally happens...

Could you tell him if you were me?

Could you do that to someone you love?

HER BREATHING ACCELERATES

OK, her sats are dropping, let's get some oxygen. Slow down.

-Do you want to make the sirens go and the lights flash?

-I'm not a little girl, you know.

-Got a gob on her, this one!

-Dunno where she gets that from.

I take it you can climb in yourself?

A mum's supposed to protect her kid.

I chose Nikki, let her in our house, trusted her.

-It's my fault...

-No.

..as much as if I'd raised my hand to her myself.

When we found you down the hole? Was that the first time?

Then why did you stay with her?

Because I love her.

This, Jess, this isn't love.

It wasn't like this in the beginning,

it's only the last couple of months.

So what are you going to do?

Only thing I can do. I'm leaving her.

She wants to call her Poppy, Doc, but it's a little kid's name.

You've got to think about what it'll be like when she's a grown-up.

Cheryl, we're going to take you for that scan and a few tests

and I'll talk to my colleagues on the medical ward.

What kind of tests?

It's just a precaution.

It's cos of the crash, isn't it?

It's my fault, the baby...

Dave, do you want to... wait outside?

I'll come and find you when she's finished.

Love you.

Love you too.

Is it the cancer?

I don't know. It complicates everything.

Just make sure the baby's OK.

And what about Dave? He still thinks it's his fault.

Look, Cheryl.

You're always the smart one, aren't you?

The fast chat and the comebacks. But not this time.

Cos there's no answering back. Not with this.

You don't know what to say or do.

And you don't want to tell Dave

because you don't want him to see how scared you really are.

Problem is, it's not going away and you have to face it.

But please, not on your own. Not any more.

You're a pain in the backside, Doc, has anyone told you that?

Frequently.

Well, don't just stand there looking pretty. Go and get him back in here.

SHE SOBS

You seen Lofty?

Um, no, no. Absolutely not.

Can't you just tell him you're happy being a...a grubby caterpillar?

It was furry, not grubby.

And I really want to help with the auction, I do,

but I don't want his daft makeover.

So tell him.

Have you ever tried saying "no" to Jack before?

Jess, I think we need...

Excuse me. Where's Jess?

Er, she's been discharged.

Probably at home by now, feet up, cup of tea and a sweet...

biscuit?

Wh...what? Where?

Cancer of the colon.

How long have you known?

Three months.

I wanted to tell you but how could I?

I didn't know what to do.

Look. A few weeks, and I'm having the chemo, it's all arranged.

Unarrange it!

See, this is why I didn't tell you.

How long have we waited for this child?

If it's going to take you away from me, then I don't want it any more!

MACHINE BEEPS

Great(!) Get her up for that scan please, quickly?

Is this the bit where you tell me it's all going to be OK?

I wish I could.

Say it anyway!

Go and get your things, quick! Clothes, PJs, toothbrush...

Do you want to get your stuff?

No, I'll make do. I don't want to hang around here.

Where you going?

Going to get my things.

I'll get it, you go and get the rest of your stuff.

Somewhere in here. Where has she put it?

She was just here.

I-I was gone for a moment.

The little girl...Olivia...

You need to make sure that she's OK. Please.

Olivia, stop!

Hey, birthday girl! Where have you been?

Hey, it's me, 109 Parker Road. Come now. Police too.

You're leaving?

I know what you did to her.

Why she ended up in the ED. Just let her go.

Whatever she said, she's lying.

I don't lie, you do!

Shut up!

You can't leave! It was an accident.

I loved you. I trusted you.

You don't know how lucky you are! You've got a proper family.

I don't know what you two are making such a fuss about.

Ollie knows I didn't mean to hurt her.

You know that, don't you? Hm?

Now what about this party?

Yeah? Let's cut this cake so you can still eat some on your birthday.

Go on, darling. Make a wish?

I wish...

that you'd go away!

Why are you so ungrateful?!

-Mummy!

-It's OK, I've got you!

-Mummy!

-Just move away, it's OK.

We need urgent police back up, 109 Parker Road, quick as you can.

SIRENS WAIL

We need to get out of here!

We were supposed to be having a nice party! And you...

You've gone and ruined it all!

We're getting out of here.

Go, girls, let's go, get out!

THEY COUGH

It won't open!

OK, let's have a go.

Go, go, go, go!

OK, take it easy. You hurt anywhere?

OK, we're going to get some oxygen on you, sweetheart.

Up you go. There you go. Fire Brigade's on their way.

You all right, Dix? Where you going? Dixie?

Nikki!

Come on! We've got to get out of here, come on. Come on!

-The place is going to go up!

-No!

Nikki!

Nikki!

No! No, no, no, no, no, no!

Nikki, lie on the floor! Lie down!

Down on the floor! Stay down!

NIKKI SCREAMS

Get up!

Leave me, please!

You'd love it if she had you on her conscience, wouldn't you,

you selfish cow?

Can I get you anything?

£50. Three points.

Tyres. I knew I should have...

HE SOBS

She told him, then?

Yeah.

See, I thought she was being selfish.

But actually, all she wanted was to protect him.

Charlie, he's all I've got left and that's all..

Tell him the truth.

And then...what?

Be his big brother.

'You cook?'

Yeah! Real men make curry. And mine is very hot.

I'm talking lamb, garlic, chilli...

Oh, yeah!

I bought it in especially for you...

At yours? Um, you know what,

I haven't got any cleanser or creams...

How beautiful do you want to be?

Or clothes...

No, no. You forget about them. All right?

I'll sort it, yeah?

OK.

Hey Rob, you had some moisturisers and cleansers earlier,

how much do you want for it?

< Dixie!

What happened?

Smoke inhalation. GCS 15, pulse is 80, BP is 120/90.

OK, that's enough - cubicle 3, please.

OK, let's get you through to cubicles.

Can you just look after my little girl, please?

Hey, poppet, are you going to come with me?

Staying here with Mum.

That's OK, we can check you in together if you like.

No, don't worry, Lofty, I'll sort it. Could you go on your break now?

Otherwise I'll have everyone going at once.

Gotcha! Right, if you need him, he'll be in the on call room.

What?

Fairy godmother's here and you, my little ugly bug,

are going to the ball. Come on.

Right, mate, this is Nikki Chisom, suffering from smoke inhalation

and facial burns, GCS 15, we have given her 10 of morphine. OK?

OK, can we get some more fluids into her, please?

And let's get blood gases. And another 10 of morphine.

OK. Can you feel this?

Right, there's no sensation at all.

Mm. These look full thickness.

Can you call the burns unit and tell them

we've got a patient for them, please.

Earlier...

..you were trying to keep me away from them.

Yeah. I took my eye off the ball though.

I wish you hadn't.

Oh flipping heck, can you just stop fussing, I am fine!

Why don't you just relax? Enjoy being the hero.

I'm not.

You saved three people from a burning building.

I think you're a hero whether you like it or not.

Even if one of them wasn't worth saving?

She hurt Jess. Over and over.

If I'd left her, she'd never have hurt anyone again.

We save lives, don't we?

It's not ours to judge which are worth the effort.

'They've got Lofty,'

they're going to make way more money than us.

They can't. We'll never live it down.

They're going to make a right show of us.

MAN SCREAMS

Masochist! >

Now we've got a smooth surface to work with, see?

Oh, stop whinging. I'm just trying to make him more marketable!

Well, you better hurry up. You've only got two hours.

My nipple!

Look. He does looks a bit pink!

I've got that covered, sister.

SHE LAUGHS

Mr Glavin?

Your wife's still having her scan, but she should be out soon

and we've asked the obstetric doctors to come and see her.

You can make her have the chemo now, can't you?

No, she can refuse that if that's what she wants.

Call yourself a doctor?

You're supposed to save lives, not stand by and watch while my wife...

I understand that you're upset.

I should sue you for negligence

and her for, for... She's not thinking straight!

Because she's scared!

Look, she's scared she's going to lose you, the baby.

That's her family. What she did...

She did because she loves you. She loves you both.

Hey, I've been looking for you. No more excuses.

For me? Oh! That's not my usual brand, but...

Yeah, I know, but it's good to try something different.

Do you know what, I am really sorry. I've got a meeting tomorrow

and I've left the paperwork at home.

Do you know what? No worries, sweet cheeks.

You don't need to explain.

I know you're on your break, but...

I'm sorry, I, I...

Careful, you're going to streak! It's OK, it's for charity!

And to think I thought you were ready for a promotion.

Get dressed, Lofty. Now.

My career's over.

She's seen my bum.

Look on the bright side. Least it's tanned.

-Hey, how you doing?

-The obstetric SPR has been delayed, I'm afraid,

but he'll be down as soon as possible.

I've been thinking, we'll call her Poppy, yeah?

-If that's what you want?

-Cheryl... Cheryl? Cheryl?

-ALARMS BEEP

-OK, she's arrested. Let's get her down.

..Mrs Beauchamp! I need some help, please. She's arrested.

We need to deliver this baby now.

Right, we've got four minutes to keep the baby viable. Come on!

-Good heavens! You're practically phosphorescent.

-Don't.

You can't make me feel any worse.

Perhaps keep your clothes on next time?

That's good advice.

I've messed up this promotion big time, haven't I?

-It was disappointing, Lofty.

-I'll make up for it.

I'm going to show you I'm not just some bronzed,

muscle-bound...himbo...

I'm a serious nurse. And this job means everything to me.

Suction.

Time?

Three minutes 43.

-OK, I've got the head.

-Careful, the cord.

Yes. Baby's coming out.

There we go.

All right, clamping the cord.

-BABY WAILS

-Any output?

No.

Right. Let's go for the thrombolysis and get this clot dissolved.

-She's going to bleed out!

-I will deal with the bleed, OK.

At the moment, she has no output, we have no choice.

We saved the baby, that's what she wanted.

Right, can we start her on the reteplase, please?

Let's run four units of O-Neg, stat.

Can we have 10mg of oxytocin, please?

I'd like adrenaline every four minutes.

-Keep an eye on the time, please.

-Come on, Cheryl, come on.

There's so much blood. We need to get this sorted now.

I'm going to lose her, aren't I?

She's critically ill, I'm afraid.

But they're doing everything they can.

Yours and Olivia's blood gasses are fine,

in that respect, you are free to go.

Nikki is going to require surgery.

There will be scarring.

I... I'm really sorry.

Come on, you, let's check out that vending machine.

I can't see a thing.

Right, swab.

Suction, please.

WET SUCKING

-BABY WAILS NEARBY

-The drugs should've restored the blood flow to the heart,

but it's coming out as fast as we can put it in.

-We could do with some diathermy.

-There's the bleeding point.

-Right, got it, got it. Right, clip!

-Come on, Cheryl.

-OK.

-Got it?

Yeah.

All right. That should help. Do you want somebody else to take over?

No, no, I'm good.

That was Theatre, give them ten minutes and take her straight up.

Right, I am happy that we've got the bleed.

Let's keep pushing the bloods

and put up the cross-match up as soon as it arrives.

HE PANTS

MONITORS BEEP

-You've got output.

-Yeah!

Well done, Cal. Well done.

My man.

-And that was good work from you, too.

-You weren't so shoddy yourself!

Look, about tonight...

You like things on your own territory, I get it. It's cool.

I don't want you to think...

-When you're ready, you know where I am, all right?

-Thank you.

-So, curry's at yours, yeah?

-Oh, yes.

-You've got garam masala?

Mate, I need a favour. A big one....

Yeah, you look like it.

Hey.

Your face...

The doctors have said I'll be scarred...

..which is no more than I deserve.

I know that there are no excuses.

Don't...

I know...I...twisted...things...

..to make sense of them to myself more than anything.

Why, Nikki?

When I lost my job...

..I felt so worthless.

I was so...angry.

I couldn't control it.

And every time I lost it,

I felt you getting further and further away.

When I hit you, it wasn't me,

it was someone I didn't recognise.

I want to be that girl that you fell in love with again.

She doesn't exist any more.

It's over, Nikki.

I hope you get better soon.

You forgive me, don't you?

For me, yeah.

But for what you did to Ollie...?

Never.

You wanted me to make a statement? I'm ready.

You've got nothing to blame yourself for.

Thank you.

Hey, do you want to meet your daughter?

POPPY GURGLES

-She's beautiful.

-Yeah.

-I didn't mean it when I said I didn't want her.

-I know.

Can I touch her?

Yeah, of course.

Hey, babe.

It's your little girl...Poppy...

Right, Theatre are ready. I want her up there ASAP, please.

All right?

I, er... I gave her money for sweets.

Reckoned a bit of tooth decay won't matter in the grand scheme of things.

Thanks.

Did you made your statement?

Yeah... They're going to take us to the safe house,

just till I get something sorted.

-Dix... I don't know what to say, if it hadn't been for you...

-Sssh.

Thanks.

-How lame does that sound?

-Well, don't say it, then!

SHE SIGHS

You know they're my favourite, don't you?

Are we going home now? Is Nikki coming?

No, she's not, sweetheart.

-We're going to go somewhere safe.

-Want to go home!

Hey, doesn't really matter where you go, does it?

It's just you and your mum now.... and you know what?

You're going to be just fine.

DIXIE CHUCKLES

Be good.

Right, part-timer. Pub.

Do you know what, buddy, I just want to go home.

-Yes, that's not an option. It's your round.

-Hm!

Bad day?

The worst.

Just...no time to think,

everything going wrong.

Ethan, there's something I wanted to say.

Hey, you having a Thursday-night special?

HE CHUCKLES

Yes.

Mum's bridge night.

I'm really glad she never knew what I used to feed you,

she'd never have let me babysit again, I'll tell you that.

BOTH SIGH

We were so lucky, growing up, with Mum...

-About Mum...

-This little girl today, and her mum, Jess.

And Jess's partner.

I could've done something weeks ago, but I missed the signs.

I was too busy and then, today...

INAUDIBLE CONVERSATION

I dunno, I just...

I can't get them out of my head!

Sorry.

What did you want to say?

Please tell me it's good news? I need that.

It's just that, um...

..this looks as good as it's ever looked.

Go on.

-Thanks.

-Drink your milk.

The winner on blue is number 49!

Where's Lofty? He should be here by now, oiling up.

He's probably bottled it.

No, no, he wouldn't do that. Not for charity.

Lofty's tied up with work and asked me to stand in for him,

-if that's OK?

-Suppose you'll do.

Right.

OK, let's get this show on the road. I've got curry to make.

And the winner this time is number 13.

Will the winner step forward, please?

Pamper spa day package with a complimentary...

..cut and blow dry to finish off your day of relaxation.

Thank you very much, sir, and good luck with that.

OK, folks, first item on our auction

is a romantic night out on the town, meal for two and drinks,

with a late replacement for the lovely Lofty.

Mr Loverman, himself.

Shabba!

Mr Jacob Masters! ALL YELL

MUSIC: Bombastic by Shaggy

Right, who's going to offer me £50 to start?

SHOUTING

-Come on. ladies, you can do better than that?!

-Any advance on £50?

Look at this, ladies, look at that lovely beef steak there.

£100!

£100, I have £100! Any advance on that!

He's not worth that!

£175!

£175! Wonderful!

Any more for any more?

That's it, they've won.

Two hundred!

Two hundred pounds!

Sold to the gentleman in the corner!

Come on, ladies, you can top that!

There we go, Jack, thank you very much.

Well, hello there, big boy!

Come on.

SHOUTING AND APPLAUSE

And now, for our next auction...

-Hey, Dixie!

-APPLAUSE

Great day's work!

I'm really not in the mood for this.

Dix, you're the conquering hero.

Get a drink down your gullet and lap it up.

Like I said, you need to get yourself a life.

Yeah, reckon you might be right.