Crazy Little Thing Called Love Casualty

"The Trust were pleased following

"a very successful trial with the automated systems."

They're trying to replace me, aren't they?

Say it didn't work out with us, then you and Cal, you know,

it would be broken for nothing.

I'll take the risk.

Would you do me the honour of making me Mrs Fairhead?

When I called the police I think I gave the wrong name.

Spare the rod, and spoil the child.

I got you so wrong! You're not my brother - you're nothing!

I found this cufflink in Alicia's bedroom.

If you're really worried, why don't you ask her?

Baby girl! Thanks for coming, love.

What's going on, Mam?

You'll see! Come on.

So, almost four decades, one beautiful daughter,

four houses, five dogs and a gerbil later.

LAUGHTER

Here we are. You are my world, Jackie Munroe.

And I love you more today than I ever have done.

Thank you, for this incredible journey. Happy anniversary, darling.

ALL: Happy anniversary!

Scoobie! Hey, we're trying again.

Ha! Just the man I want to see.

Can I borrow you for five minutes?

What are you doing in Alicia's locker?

Just leaving her a little surprise.

You know, I felt bad after the trust thing, so...

Oh, I've been making stag enquires.

So, I was thinking Monte Carlo or Ibiza?

Barry.

Barry?! As in Wales?

We had some lovely family holidays there when I was a kid.

Sentimental journey. Get on it.

She's got a second mobile.

I thought you'd got over this.

Yeah. It's just a blip.

Your dad bought me open train tickets for Europe.

Like we did on our honeymoon. How could I refuse?

I can think of a reason, Mam.

I can think of many reasons, actually.

I am miserable on my own, Alicia.

Could you not tell that at Christmas?

Martin, hi!

Alicia, come and say hello.

Howard, your business partner's here.

I brought a gift.

Oh! Lovely.

This is really is really important to me.

OK, OK, OK. Let's give it a go.

MUSIC: Have I Told You Lately by Rod Stewart

# Have I told you lately that I love you... #

Ow! What did you do that for?

That was your fault. Definitely your fault.

OK.

What is this?

First dance.

Problem is though he's got less rhythm than my fridge freezer.

Is this for our benefit?!

Yeah.

Got to get back. There's a woman in bed three...

Jac invited me. What could I say?

I'm her pal.

Work, family commitments, you're ill - anything!

Would have looked weird if I didn't turn up today.

My daughter's in there!

OK, you're right. I'm sorry.

Hands up, I just wanted to see you.

No, no! Get out.

-Howard.

-Get out!

Martin! Hold on.

You don't want me here. You've made that pretty clear.

We need to talk about this!

There's nothing to talk about.

Look, I just don't want to leave things like this.

Come on, man!

Martin!

HE GROANS

God!

Oh, no, no.

Alicia!

No! Oh, my...

HE GROANS

Just focus, son, and do what you do best, yeah?

Show this scout what you're made of. Good lad.

Love ya.

(You, too.)

Scott, come on, mate. We're waiting

I need the loo!

I just hope they're playing the four-three-three this week.

Yeah.

We need to get him out!

We move the car, it all comes down.

Can you give us some room, please? Alicia?

He's my dad. His pulse is getting weaker.

Fire service are five minutes off.

That's too long!

Jez? We need to get this car reversed, mate.

Can you help me clear this are please? Nice and steady.

Right, Jez, nice and slowly mate.

HE GROANS

Mam!

I think I felt crepitus as we moved him.

I need to get a binder on quick.

Are you OK?

'Ow!'

Son? What's happened?

It's all right, it's all right.

So, what time's your interview?

Couple of hours.

So out of order.

HE IMITATES GUNSHOT

SCHWARZENEGGER VOICE: Hasta la vista, baby.

Alicia?

Right, Cal, this is Howard Munroe, 58.

It's my dad.

At approximately 16:05 he was pinned against a skip by a car.

Possible pelvic fracture. He's been complaining of chest pains en-route.

GCS 15, pulse 88, BP 105/82, sats 96%, resps of 22.

He's had 100% oxygen therapy,

ten of morphine and half a bag of saline.

OK, thanks, Iain. Straight through to Resus, please.

Ethan, you remember my mum, yeah?

Yes, she had the gonorrhoea. Sorry.

She's got a laceration to her head. Do you mind?

I'm going to see to my dad.

Of course.

Alicia. I meant to reverse. I swear.

Don't worry. Dad said, OK?

I'll keep you updated, Martin.

Thank you.

-That's great - thanks, Iain.

-No probs.

-Scoobie.

-Scoobie?

Don't ask.

OK. Airway is clear. Good bilateral air entry.

No sign of a pneumothorax.

He's a lot more tachycardic and he's dropped his BP to 95/50.

Let me help, please? What can I do?

Daughter, off duty, and alcohol.

One glass.

OK. He's become pretty shocked.

Why? What's wrong with him?

It's possibly an MI, so let's go 12 lead, please.

Alicia?

It looks like you might have had a small heart attack, Dad.

But just try and relax. We can fix this easily, OK?

Let's get a troponin and can someone speak to the Cath lab as well?

He might need stenting.

Hang on if he's got an unstable pelvic fracture,

shouldn't we try and fix that first?

It complicates things, but his heart takes priority for now. Don't worry.

It's going to be fine. I promise.

I'll explain to Mam.

We're going to get you a chest and pelvic X-ray done,

and you'll need some scans at some point, too.

And then we'll get that heart of yours sorted.

His heart?

I'm sorry, and you are...?

A friend.

You're going to have to speak to his wife or daughter, I'm afraid.

He's been having chest pains for about a year.

His family never mentioned that.

They probably didn't know. Relationship stress.

One minute son, I've got to check you in.

Why is it in Chinese?!

Hey! You all right, mate? You all right?

OK?

I couldn't understand that stupid machine.

Charlie!

Yeah. Oh, right.

Let's get you into cubicles and have a look at that.

Can you find us a wheelchair? What's your name?

Scott. Scott Murray.

OK, Scott. Excuse me a minute.

Louise, will you take these for me?

Do flowers - no expense spared. All the information is in there.

Don't let Duffy catch you.

Well done, Noel.

Right, up we come.

Excuse me. You're Alicia's boyfriend, aren't you?

Howard told me about you.

Yeah.

What you saw before, is over.

Done. So don't ruin it for Jackie, please.

She's going through enough right now.

It's really nothing to do with me.

Hi.

So the ECG has confirmed that Howard has had a large anterior MI

so they've put in two stents.

But he's more stable. So, he's going to be fine.

Can I see him?

I haven't finished here yet. Sorry.

And he's just about to go for a CT scan of his pelvis.

Thank you for helping with me dad. I'm really glad you're here.

Yeah, don't mention it.

Those pills will stop the pain and stop any further fainting episodes.

How did this happen, exactly?

I stood on it at footy.

Very few things in life

more important to this boy than footy, is there?

I've got a trial for Holby in three weeks.

-I've got to make it.

-Charlie!

Right, well, we'll run an X-ray to see the exact location and

how deeply the nail is embedded.

And obviously we'll check for any fractures and we'll know

a little bit more then. OK?

So, I went for peonies in the end.

-Now, does she have a dress yet?

-I don't think so.

Well, I've got a mate who's got a boutique

so I'll get her to bring some in at lunchtime, yeah?

That's brilliant, thank you.

Sorry.

Well, that couldn't have been more awkward.

Having to treat Alicia's mum after the whole STI thing.

Oh, yeah, she caught it off the dad.

Apparently he was sleeping around with other women.

Yeah, well, not sure about that last part.

How do you mean?

Alicia never mentioned anything about an STI.

Yeah. He's a bit of a player by all accounts.

Do you think it runs in the family? The player thing?

Alicia's got a secret mobile.

Right.

Password required. Um, um...

OK, well...

Her birthday!

4-4-2-1, that's her Pin.

Cal?

She lent me her bank card to get drinks one night.

Bingo!

Wait, wait, wait, wait!

Who's LoverBoy?

"Hey, sexy, what underwear have you got on beneath those scrubs?"

Scrubs?

PHONE DINGS

"Want some fun? Meet Peace Garden

"at 6pm."

Mrs Munroe, hi.

You did say that you'd stay in Cubicles until these dizzy

spells wore off.

-Sorry, Doctor.

-OK. Can I get you to take a seat, please?

So how are you feeling, Mr Munroe?

You call him Howard, pet.

Alicia...

The cardiologist said he had mild hyperkalaemia.

So they gave him calcium chloride?

Yeah. And he's stable.

But they want us to monitor him down here for a bit.

Oh, Martin, come on in.

I'm just going for a coffee if anybody...

Sorry, no drinks allowed.

And there's already too many people in here, I'm afraid.

Come on, Cal. Martin and me dad are close.

You're telling me.

What did you say?

Nothing, I didn't mean...

Didn't mean what?

-Leave it, Alicia.

-What's going on?

So, no coffee?

Hang on a second. Cal?

You two can't even look at me.

Come on. They deserve the truth.

What? You two are...?

Were.

I don't understand.

You're gay?

SHE LAUGHS

OK. The good news is that the nail is pretty superficially embedded

so we can do the extraction here.

We'll take the nail out, and then we'll deal with the boot, all right?

130 quid, they were.

Since the nail went through your snazzy soccer shoe,

we'll give you some tetanus immunoglobulin and

antibiotics in case there's any soil in the wound, OK?

-Can we sort him out some Entonox, please, Charlie?

-Yeah.

And what about the trials?

Fingers crossed we'll have you back on the pitch as quick as a flash.

All right?

Thanks, Doc.

He acts like football is the most important thing in his life,

and then doesn't seem all that pleased when I say I can get

him straight back on the pitch.

What do you make of that?

Well, maybe he's realised there's more to life than hoofing

a pig's bladder up and down a field.

Because of the job you did on the flowers,

I've got the venue on the phone this afternoon about menus and

numbers and photographers, giving me quotes.

Excellent. I watch Don't Tell The Bride every week.

Right - no, absolutely. Don't tell the bride.

Sorry, guys.

Scott's dad wants to give some feedback about the machines.

When he's done that can you see if you can find any old notes on Scott?

And get me his GP's number.

I want to check if he's got a history of self-harming.

-OK, sure.

-Right, thanks.

So I was thinking.

Do you want to do some interview prep beforehand?

Prep? I don't need prep. Look, I told you, I'll be...

If you do another Arnie impression I will kill you.

I'm prepared. I promise.

Your dad's not gay, darling. That's a daft thing to say!

Dad?

Right, Cal, you want to know why he calls me Scoobie?

See, when I was a little girl me dad used to work away a lot. Didn't you?

But I would always try to stop him leaving the house,

cos I wanted to see him more.

I was a real Daddy's girl.

Then.

So one day, I got this Scoubidou string.

Kids used to use them to make bracelets.

And I tied his wrist to mine and I said...

"Wherever you go, I go, Daddy."

And he's kept it ever since.

The man I admired so much, looked up to

me entire life and it turns out he's nothing but a lying coward.

I'm going to go and get some tea. Who wants tea?

I've always loved you, Jackie. I never lied about that.

But you knew my parents.

-You think my father would have accepted a gay son 40

-years

-ago?

My friends?

So I did what everyone was telling me to do. I conformed.

And then I met you and we had Alicia. My beautiful little girl.

And suddenly I've got everything in the world to lose.

How long?

Nine, nine and a half year.

Jackie!

It must have taken a lot of effort to get that nail through this boot.

Are you sure it was an accident?

How else would I have done it?

OK. Right.

I'm just going to pop off and get some stuff to clean that with.

-Charlie?

-Yeah?

Scott's GP has just faxed over his old notes. Looks like you

were right about his history.

He self-harmed in the past,

-four years ago when his mum died of cancer.

-Right.

But he seems to have stopped now.

OK. Thanks, Noel.

Iain? How's Gem?

Two weeks added to her sentence. So thanks for that.

Muffin. Coffee. Apology.

You didn't have to do that.

So, two weeks added on.

Yeah.

Well, let's hope she learns her lesson this time.

Do you know what, Lily?

All of a sudden I'm not very hungry.

Should I even be angry? I mean, he can't help it, right?

He still lied.

Everybody lies.

Why did you take him back, Mam?

I'm 56, Alicia.

So I just spend the rest of me days by meself?

Evenings and weekends alone, meals for one.

Nothing to get up for in the morning.

No, no, don't you dare!

It's about companionship isn't it?

Isn't that what marriage is really about?

It's so much deeper than physical attraction.

You must be suffocating under all that sand you're burying your head in.

He's gay!

Me dad's gay.

Hi, Scott. My name's Robyn.

I'm just going to give you a little jab, OK?

Just going to avoid any infection.

Guess I was lucky, wasn't I? That it wasn't worse?

You sure were.

What damage could have been done?

Well, if you'd have hit the bone, then you could have been in trouble.

OK, there we go. All done.

So, Howard, the CT scan has confirmed there is some blood loss

coming from your pelvic fracture.

What would you have done if you were me?

If you loved two people at the same time.

And whichever one you choose, someone's going to get hurt.

PHONE BUZZES

Howard?

You shouldn't be here, Martin.

You can throw me out of your house,

but you can't throw me out of the hospital.

Doctor, the heart attack could have been caused by stress, couldn't it?

The stress of living a lie for so long.

Stop this.

I feel bad for Jackie, of course I do.

But you don't have to pretend any more.

Isn't that a huge weight lifted? This is your time now, Howard.

This is finally your time.

I've got to get her back. She'll come round.

I'll...

I'll talk her round.

I can't keep doing this.

Howard. If it's a no now,

it's a no forever.

It's my family.

Come before your own happiness?

They come before everything.

I'm sorry.

I'll...

I'll go and check upstairs. See if they're ready.

From the mystery man?

Are you sure we should do this? Meet this guy?

Maybe sometimes things are better left alone.

We need to know, Cal. You need to know.

I promise you, mate, you're well off, all right?

But thank you for your concern.

Charlie here thinks you did this to yourself, Scott.

Tell him, you wouldn't do that, would you?

Stamp on a nail? Nah.

Exactly what I said.

Now, sooner we can get you out of this place,

sooner you can get back on that pitch.

Forget all about this. Right, son?

Yeah.

I'm hungry. I'm going to see what I can find.

I do know you've hurt yourself in the past, Scott.

You can speak to me.

If you want...

I just want to go home.

You're due a break, it won't take long. For Charlie's sake.

I should have known Charlie was behind this.

MUSIC: Salute by Little Mix

Come on, boys. That's it, work the trains.

Strike a pose, Noel!

Max?

So, what do you think?

Actually, they're a bit bland.

They're couture.

I didn't really want the big white wedding frock.

But, I wouldn't mind a little bit of zhuzh.

Zhuzh?

And why wouldn't I?

Because, you know...

Well, you've been around the wedding block a couple of times already so...

Duffy, wait...

You want the perfect dress? Pick it yourself.

Duffy?

Wedding jitters. She'll be fine.

Yeah? Yeah.

Eye of the tiger, yeah? Eye of the tiger.

Eye of the tiger.

'Argh...'

Hello?

You OK?

Have you seen Scott? Well, he ain't in his bed.

Unlock the door! I'll get someone.

Charlie, in here!

What we got?

It's Scott.

Oh, OK, Scott.

Shall I get a wheelchair?

Yes, please.

Sorry, Dad.

Remember, just try and stay calm, OK?

PHONE RINGS

Yo, sexy.

Hello? Are you there, babe?

Oh, I'm here, babe.

You're sleeping with Alicia? Behind his back?

Wait. What?

Is that your phone?

Er. Yeah, but... ?

-Oh!

-Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa

What the hell's going on?!

Cal found your phone.

Yeah. And I have read all your messages.

That was you?

Just a little prank.

A prank?!

Me and Max have been winding each other up.

So, I pretended to be this hot doctor that he was flirting with.

Why have you taken my phone?

How did you even get my password?

Right, let's get that lip looked at.

Do you know what, with everything going on today,

Cal, I really don't need this.

Idiot!

-Four trials.

-And every time, you get so excited.

But I failed them all.

You don't say anything, but I can see it,

the disappointment in your face.

I don't want to let you down any more, Dad.

I'm sorry.

Don't worry, I'm sure he'll be back.

I'll just be a minute, OK?

All that to make someone else happy? Honestly, I call that stupid.

OK, I'll make a referral to the adolescent psychiatry team. OK?

I am so sorry. About the phone, and about the password.

I just, it's just, when I saw it...

We've had fun together, Cal. Haven't we?

Why have we stopped?

I do trust you.

You hardly know me. Not really.

Which is why it worked so well before, when it was just...

Fun.

Everything eventually falls apart when it's held together by a lie.

Cal, I'm not sure how to say...

Hang on...

I don't know. I don't know any more, Cal.

You and I. Together. Have you ever noticed that?

And as long as we love each other, that's all that matters, isn't it?

So, if you feel you'd like to postpone things...

What are you talking about, you mad man?

Of course I don't want to postpone.

But I want to do what we want.

Not for anybody else.

Not to show off.

Louise.

I'm fired, aren't I?

I think I know how you could put yourself to better use.

Noel found Scott Murray with a significant self-inflicted

wound, and acted quickly.

For the second time today. You think a machine could do that?

Thanks, Charlie.

Scott Murray, school report. English - A.

"Natural flair for the written word."

Maths - D.

"Tries hard, gives everything, but could benefit from extra tuition. "

Hip-hop dance academy, 2008. Remember that?

School reports good and bad.

All in here.

See, I'm proud of you, no matter what you do.

No matter if you fail or succeed.

Because I'm your dad.

So you don't ever, ever think you're letting me down again.

Do you hear me?

OK!

So we're just going to have a quick read of your application

again and then we'll crack on, OK?

I'm sorry. I mean, thank you! Not sorry.

I've got nothing to be sorry about. Have I?

Anyway. That's cool.

That's all cool.

OK.

They're ready for you in theatre, Dad.

You ARE kidding me.

I love your mum.

You love her so much you gave her an STI from another man(!)

You're gay, Dad.

Alicia...

You just don't care. Do you? You just want it all.

-Have your cake and eat it.

-Scoobie...

She didn't get out of bed for three weeks the last time you left. Three weeks!

That's enough!

You know what, Dad? I actually hate you.

HE MOANS

And I'm not picking you up again, Mam. So if you take him back,

that's it, OK? You're on your own from now on.

I'm not feeling so good.

Howard?!

Oh! His pelvis.

He's tachycardic. Pulse is thready.

OK. Let's lie him down.

Activate the major haemorrhage protocol, all right?

And fast page orthos.

BP's really dropped.

Let's take him up now.

He's not going to make it. He's going to arrest!

I knew we should have dealt with his pelvis first.

-Stay with us, Howard. Stay with us.

-MUFFLED:

-Martin.

What are you trying to say Dad?

Martin. He's asking for Martin.

BPs are un-recordable and he's throwing out some VEs.

Cal, what are we going to do? I'm going to losing him.

I really can't lose him!

OK. We need to turn off the tap.

Reboa. I'm going to do a Reboa. Let's get the kit.

Do you know how?

I've done one before.

One? How did it go?

Could someone get Dylan, please?

-We don't have time to find Dylan right now.

-He's my dad, though, Cal.

Alicia, I can do this. Trust me.

I can do this.

-Prepare for an RSI?

-Is he supporting his own airway?

-Yes.

We need to get on with this.

Dad's heart isn't getting enough blood,

because the vessels in his pelvis are haemorrhaging.

So, Cal, Dr Knight, is going to insert

a balloon into his aorta to stop the blood rushing to his pelvis.

So, Noel...

How do you think the automated check-in systems are working?

Can we help you, Louise?

I just want the panel to know that Noel here,

a real receptionist, potentially just saved a boy's life.

A boy whose dad couldn't work one of your check-in machines.

Thank you.

Look, I understand that these machines were brought in with good intentions,

I really do. But Reception,

well, it's our front-line of humanity.

We deal with scared, vulnerable people, day in and day out.

People that need compassion from the minute they walk through the

door from a human, and not some pimped-up cashpoint.

So, please, I'm begging you.

For the sake of patient safety, don't sack our receptionists.

Sack the machines.

Aim for zone three.

Measure the balloon catheter to determine how far to advance

the balloon into the aorta.

About 40 to 45cme from the groin?

-Yeah.

-Mark it.

Needle, please.

Advance the needle slowly until it punctures the wall of the artery.

Seldinger wire.

And pull.

Thank you.

No. No, no, no, not again.

What's happening?

The needle tip must be against a wall of the artery.

Can someone get Dylan, please? Find Dylan!

There's no time for that! You said it yourself.

I can't do it, Alicia.

Please, though, Cal.

Please!

Um, OK. Let me try changing the angle of the needle.

OK. Yep, I'm in. I'm in.

HE SIGHS

Syringe, please.

Inflating the balloon.

HE GROANS

OK. His pulse is getting stronger. He's stable.

Theatre, now, please!

Good job.

Thank you.

If you had any concerns, there were ways to voice them, Lou.

Noel was getting on just fine until you burst in.

Sorry.

However, the board were really moved by what you said.

So moved that they've decided to suspend the trials.

So no more "pimped-up cashpoints" for now.

So my job's safe?

It's looking really good, my man.

And well done, by the way, with the boy. Well done, mate.

Hey! I am back!

You're out of here!

I'm so sorry, Jac.

I really am.

All these years as friends.

All gone.

You owe me.

Anything.

He needs you.

Me and Howard have been over for years, we both know that.

But we cling onto what we both know.

Because that's easier, isn't it?

Than facing the unknown.

He needs YOU, Martin.

He loves YOU.

So just go to him, OK?

Hotel and spa resort cancelled.

Thank you.

Hospital chapel booked.

And the reception is down the pub.

Tomorrow.

What?!

We're doing the stag tonight.

Then I have got a wedding to organise.

SHE GIGGLES

Wait a minute. Before you go...

MUSIC: Have I Told You Lately by Rod Stewart

-# Have I told you lately

-That I love you?

# Have I told you there's no-one else above you?

# Fill my heart with gladness

# Take away all my sadness

# Ease my troubles, that's what you do... #

Excuse me. Thank you.

SONG CONTINUES TO PLAY

MICROWAVE DINGS

SHE LAUGHS

What?

That's going to be you and Alicia next!

(Hiya.)

The operation went well, Dad.

Cal was...amazing.

He saved your life.

I am so sorry.

Jackie, sweetheart.

When you crashed back then, you asked for Martin.

You are worth so much more than this.

It has been a great adventure.

-SOBBING:

-Yeah...it has.

CHEERING

Stag! Stag! Stag!

All right! Let's do this.

There's going to be so many broken hearts now you're off the

market, Charlie.

Well, I'm not off the market just yet!

Excuse me! Just bring him back in one piece, OK?

Ah!

Oi! Come on. The big man's last night of freedom.

Stag nights.

I don't think there's a thing in the world worse than stag nights.

-We'll keep it tame for you.

-Well, I tell you what.

You can give me a lift to the kennels, because I've got to pick Dervla up.

-You can do whatever you want - you're driving.

-You what?

Everyone else has had a drink.

Ye gods, this day just gets better and better, doesn't it(?)

Hey.

They've split up.

Oh.

It's for the best.

Yeah, it's never easy though. No matter how old you are.

I've got you something to cheer you up.

Would you, Alicia Munroe...

Cal... No.

..do me the honour of...

..wearing these?

Novelty knickers! Phew!

See. I still want to have fun.

'Stag! Stag!'

We good?

(Yeah.)

'Cal! Come on!'

OK. Just let me know how your dad gets on. All right?

Bet you give these to all your girlfriends.

Only the ones I'm in love with.

Right!

You are not my brother.

The Ethan-ator.

CUFFLINK FALLS

Charlie, can you believe I nearly blew it all for that?

But you didn't.

Champagne!

Come on, and these.

Thanks.

Hey, where did you get that? Been looking for that everywhere.

CHAMPAGNE SPRAYS AND CHEERING

'Right, that's this party started.'