08/10/2013 EastEnders


08/10/2013

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Transcript


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Oh, it's alive, then!

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You don't remember, do you?

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Too drunk to even get into your own bed.

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Taking that kidney for a final road test, huh?

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I'm just training it up for you.

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Do you know what? It's not a joke.

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He needs one that's working. Not one that's pickled.

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We said we'd let the boy have some fun.

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You know what? I ain't tidying up.

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And you - you make sure you phone Abi.

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She's worried about you.

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She came round here to see you but you were dead to the world...

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Bye. Bye.

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Hey, let me throw you a lifeline. I'll tidy.

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And ignore her.

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She spent half of last night saying how proud she was of you.

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HE COUGHS

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Look, look, look. Look what I've got here.

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Scarlett, look! I've got Jemima the duck! SCARLETT WHIMPERS

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Please, just give me a break... it's been all night long...

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Please... Shhh... OK, all right.

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Alfie Moon! You the man.

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You the man!

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Come on, Roxy. Answer your phone.

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'Please record your message...'

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Tiff!

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It's all right. Don't worry.

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What, is this the surprise?

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You drag me away from my work to show me an empty pub?

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My pub, bro.

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See, Alfie left on a last-minute trip to get out of here, yeah,

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so I'm the boss.

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And how many pub bosses do you know that are single, huh?

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This place is a premium lady magnet.

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Wow, free peanuts.

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My life will change(!)

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You see Poppy? I just saw her, you know.

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She looked at me like I was nothing. Blanked me.

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When she walks in later, I'll let her know, man. I'll tell her. I'll be like...

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Baby - you're barred, you know.

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What, for dumping you? Hey, it was a mutual decision, all right?

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This is a fresh new start.

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I want to show Alfie that I'm more than just a potboy.

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I want to change up things.

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Maybe a couple of sexy theme nights.

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Maybe a couple of bikini-clad barmaids.

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You're not going to get Tracey to wear a bikini.

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Mate, come on, we'll recruit fresh, obviously, all right?

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I think you'll find that Alfie's already been recruiting...

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Yeah, I got the job. Head barman.

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No, but wait, I'm still in charge. I'm manager.

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Yeah, but I'm the old head to cool down your steam.

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Make sure you return this place the way Alfie left it.

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And I ain't so sure I've got the figure for a bikini, you know.

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Yeah, but, Sadie, Pops has got work later.

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So how am I going to get a baby-sitter?

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No, of course... Of course I want to work...

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I'll try, OK? Bye.

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I thought I was going to have to save you last night. Mm?

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Dexter. Doesn't know how to take no for an answer, does he? No.

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Still. Least you pulled for once, eh?

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Nice!

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These two were getting pretty close last night. Oh, yeah?

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You don't fancy her as well, do you?

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No, I don't fancy her. No.

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A wise idea.

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When you think of all the tawdry little scrubbers he's had in that bed...

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Probably a lot more than were willing to climb into your pit, Michael.

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Very good.

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And so accommodating, isn't he...

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Very forgiving.

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Unlike Alfie.

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Bye.

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You can't call someone a nutjob, darling.

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That's not a very nice word.

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You leave the fighting talk round here to me. Go on.

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Are you going to fight Masood so you can stay with Nana Carol?

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No. I just want your nana to be happy, that's all.

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Here you are, stick that in there. She was crying today.

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Was she?

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It's Billie's birthday. She always cries on Billie's birthday.

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Oh, well, that's not good, is it? Here you are.

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Then you and I, we're going to have to find a way of cheering her up, aren't we?

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Look, am I in trouble? Don't you remember?

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Come on, man. All right, tell me.

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Was I bad?

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Yes. Yes, you was bad.

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And you really need to sort out your pick-up lines.

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Are you all right?

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Yeah. And here's a "I'm sorry for being an idiot last night" coffee.

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So am I forgiven? Is that enough? Or should I leave town?

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Or shall I just marry you? And then spend the rest of my life making it up to you...

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Yeah, you're forgiven. Just.

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Thought I was legally contracted to get you a big dress

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and look after someone else's kid for a minute. Huh?

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I mean, not that that would be a bad thing, just...

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Loads of bredders would still want to... Still?

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I didn't mean it like that. I'm sure you didn't, Dex. Lexi's gorgeous. And you...

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You're a hot spice! No, no, no, don't call me hot spice!

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Look, I just really, really offended Lola. I gotta go... Er, no. You're not going anywhere.

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You look shattered. Did you sleep at all last night?

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I called 111.

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They said that she's probably got a cold and to just keep an eye on her.

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Scarlett. Mummy has got to work, darling, OK?

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Have you tried the duck?

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Yes, I've tried the duck.

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What about steam for her stuffy nose?

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Sit her next to the shower. I've tried the steam and that doesn't work.

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I've tried the duck and that doesn't work.

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I've tried that stupid thing that sings that song and that doesn't work.

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I could ring Michael and see if he'll have her for tonight to give you a break.

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I know how to look after my daughter.

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She obviously just wants to stay with her mum so I'll keep her with me today, all right?

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What, in the office? Won't she need fresh air...?

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Then I'll take her to the park.

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That's enough for today. Thank you, Alice.

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SCARLETT CRIES

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I'm scared? Nah, nah, nah, no-one ever said that.

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You actually said "terrified".

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That was the alcohol talking, yeah? Well, it was your lips moving.

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You know someone had one done in 1962. Oh, my days...

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A kidney transplant. And they're still working.

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Look, can you stop looking up my organs on the internet, please?

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The point is that hospitals have been fixing people for ages. I mean, look at my mum, Lauren...

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Let me tell you something, yeah? People might get "fixed" in your nice little life.

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But not mine, yeah. Oh, "nice little life"? My dad is in prison.

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Lauren nearly died. Nearly?

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See, when I used to live on that estate it was never just a "nearly".

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You go in hospital. You come out in a box.

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What? I'm not being dramatic. It's a fact.

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Your dad'll be all right.

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Dexter, you will be all right. It's routine.

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And what, where did you read that? On some computer screen?

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No, Dex, I'm not dismissing what you're doing, all right.

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I think you are really brave. Dex...

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You all right? Yes...

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All right, Lauren?

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All right?

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Yeah, oh, congratulations, by the way.

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I heard you...found someone.

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Yeah, no, it's good... I'm pleased.

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It's just I hope he's right for you, that's all.

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Right for me? Yeah.

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Wow. What, I can't date because of what I am now?

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Is that what you're saying? No. That's not what I'm saying, Lauren.

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Not what I'm saying at all. Good. Good.

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Because you don't know anything about us.

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Maybe I don't know nothing about you, but I do know that Peter

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was getting pretty close to Lola last night.

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What's funny? I don't get it, Lauren? What? Nothing.

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You know what, actually don't, I shouldn't have said anything, should I?

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It's none of my business no more, is it?

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I'll see you later, yeah?

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You OK? Yeah, fine.

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Tiff said you were upset this morning. I'm sorry...

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Didn't realise she was watching.

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Well, she cares about you, Carol. All of your family do.

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Do you remember when she thought there was a ghost upstairs?

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And me mum had come back? I still feel her, though.

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In this house...

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I think we all do with this wallpaper.

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So, what do you feel? Clip round the ear probably.

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That was her usual welcome back for the prodigal son.

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That was the school. Interview? Tomorrow.

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You'll walk it. About time you had good news. You deserve it, Whitney.

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"You deserve it"? You don't even know her. You don't know any of us.

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Pat telling you that as well, is she? I am trying, Carol.

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Is there anything you want me to do today? To help?

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No, it's all right. Jack takes me to the crematorium...

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But thanks.

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What about this evening? Anyone going to be there for you?

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I'm not interfering, I just...

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How about I treat you to a nice quiet dinner?

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Rich now, are you?

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Whatever it is you want to do.

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Just to show that Billie ain't been forgotten.

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And neither have you.

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Look now, man, I'd help.

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But I don't want to risk my lumbago.

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Come on, Patrick.

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You fancy taking a few crates down to the barrel store?

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There's a pint in it for you.

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Er. Sorry, I do recruitment.

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Which of you two do I say yes to,

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if you offer another pint to keep it company?

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I think you've got yourself a deal.

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I'll collect them with my son

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when we've got something to celebrate in a few weeks' time.

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All right, I'll see you round the back. All right.

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Yeah, man.

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Oi, oi, Dad, what are you doing? You shouldn't be carrying that.

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Always got my back, hey, son?

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So we owe you six weeks' deposit...

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Three weeks. Little baby trashed the living room.

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Three weeks' deposit...

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I know I just said six.

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If you take that tone with me, I'm going to make it two.

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SCARLETT WHIMPERS

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I'm going to take a break.

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Child!

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Undoubtedly Scarlett is the cutest kid in Walford...

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but should she really be here?

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She'll only settle when she's with me.

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Well, then take the day off. And take Scarlett with you.

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Naughty Mummy. Come on, baby.

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So you know I manage this place, right?

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So if you want a little private lock-in...

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Want to come back to my luxury bachelor pad, you know...? That's my old room.

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He's only... He's only...

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Listen, call me, innit.

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Hey! Great wingman work, bruv. Thank you very much, man. Thanks(!)

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Well, you say "luxury bachelor pad"

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and then she just finds my old single bed with Kamil's Batman duvet on it?

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OK, well, we need a few new accessories, brother.

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But I ain't no joke, you know. Never said you were.

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No, no, I've had enough. Firstly, Poppy dumps me, yeah...

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Thought that was a mutual thing?

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Then Alfie leaves me in charge, but leaves me with some baby-sitter.

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And then you - you mess me up with a potential.

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Potential... Sorry.

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You know what, I can run this place, Tam, all right?

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And I can get the ladies. Right, and I will be something.

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You just watch.

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That's the last time that Fatboy sleeps alone under a single duvet, man.

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Hello?

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Ronnie...

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Look, I ain't so sure you're that welcome here still, you know.

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No, look, I know, all right? I'm just looking for Roxy. She's not getting her phone.

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Well, they all left.

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Alfie, Roxy and the little girl too.

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Didn't you know that?

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Yeah - yeah, of course. Of course, I just forgot.

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Look, I mean, Alfie left a note. No warning at all.

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Said he'll call me during the week.

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She didn't... Roxy didn't leave a message for me, did she?

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I'm so sorry, Ronnie.

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They won't be long. They'll be back soon, I'm sure.

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Wouldn't stay long away from family, you know.

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Thanks.

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Oh!

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Think their "barista" needs a little training. Maybe I should offer?

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Do you miss it? Cheffing?

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What do you do now?

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Taxis. Picking drunk kids up all night.

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Always feel like the concerned dad.

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Making sure they get home in one piece.

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You got kids?

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No details. No analysis.

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Thought that's what we agreed?

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Yep... Save all that for therapy.

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Sitting round in a circle,

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head full of broken toys saying what a screw-up we made of our lives...

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Us? We enjoy. You're an international woman of mystery.

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Yeah, well, maybe I'll put that on my next CV.

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Woman of mystery.

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Ooh...

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Grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change....

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And the wisdom to get a mysterious

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but very hot brunette a decent cup of coffee.

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Listen, you fancy a taxi ride?

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Yeah.

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A "sorry". About Tiff before. She really should know better at her age.

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No, look, it's fine, Don't worry about it. I'll be having words.

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There's no need. Really.

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You dumping that bed outside?

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Look, I haven't had time to clear it yet.

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No, I'm not having a go. I ain't the council.

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Can I save you the bother? No. No, don't worry about it.

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Oh, I must be losing my touch.

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Time was I could talk a lady into bed.

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Can't even do her a favour out of one now.

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No, truth is I've got a mate who flogs them second hand.

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I'll give you 20 quid for it if you like.

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No, no, I don't want your money.

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Well, take the flowers then.

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Please. Come on, throw me some rope here.

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Turning down my bed offers? Rejecting my flowers?

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You certainly know how to crush a man's feelings.

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Thank you.

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And you leave the bed - and Tiff - to me, OK?

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So... this bodyswap thing you're doing...

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Does that mean he's going to start taking on your personality?

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Start saying things like "Innit, though," and "Oh, my days"?

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You're sexy when you're angry... Bruv, my dad is sick. I mean, what, you think it's funny?

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Sorry, man. You're a good guy.

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More guts than me. Kidneys, on the other hand...

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Hey.

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I watched my family fall apart.

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Yeah, well, I'm not falling apart, am I?

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No. But you are doing exactly what we all did.

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And not talking.

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Look, Dex, come on...

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Come on...

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What...?

0:17:170:17:18

Just leave him.

0:17:180:17:20

MUSIC: "Blurred Lines" by Robin Thicke

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MUSIC: "Let's Get It On" by Marvin Gaye

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Hey, hey, hey... Big tune, brother, but come on, man, something from this millennium.

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Yeah, yeah, but your punters were all born in the last millennium.

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Now this is a tune. # Let's get it on...

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Yeah, man, I tell you, the ladies I entertained with this tune, you know....

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Patricia Evans...

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Maybe I ain't so sure I'm going to tell you that story...

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FATBOY LAUGHS Hey.

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You the new guv'nor? Fats. Or Fatboy. Or Arthur Chubb.

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You're Tiff's granddad, right? Make a man feel old, why don't you? Sorry.

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Though if I'd known at this age I'd still be waking up in a single bed at my mum's house...

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Tell me about it. I'm staying with a friend at the minute, to help him

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with the rent and that. But the bed? The bed is marga, man.

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You in the market for new furniture, then?

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I mean, as long as it's not Pat's old stuff. No disrespect or anything...

0:18:220:18:26

I know what you mean. I loved my mum, but she didn't half love chintz...

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You don't seem the sort of guy that could be flogged cast-offs.

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No, I got a really good mate, he works in a high-class bed place up in town.

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He can supply me at cost. Do you want in?

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I'd have to see it first, cos I don't really buy off of randoms.

0:18:400:18:43

Course. Course. Course. Shall I see what I can get sent over?

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All right, yeah.

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Double bed, yeah? Top of the range... Absolutely.

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Class, like yourself. You!

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Ta-ta. Take it easy.

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No, I'm her father, all right!

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She can't be taken away without you telling me.

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Jack... Jack, let me talk to her.

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Rox? How long are you going to... Roxy?

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This is Alfie, isn't it?

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It's him punishing her for speaking to me.

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Listen, I'm going to call Carol, tell her to get a cab... You can't do that. You promised her.

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Jack, I'm so sorry about all of this.

0:19:240:19:26

It's not your fault, is it?

0:19:270:19:29

HE COUGHS

0:19:380:19:40

Hey, Sam...

0:19:450:19:46

HE STRUGGLES TO BREATHE Sam?

0:19:520:19:54

Sam?

0:19:550:19:59

HE GASPS FOR BREATH

0:19:590:20:01

Where's Scarlett?

0:20:110:20:12

She's with Janine. I've got the day off.

0:20:120:20:15

Why? She wouldn't stop crying.

0:20:150:20:17

She's ill.

0:20:170:20:19

Ill? Doctor ill?

0:20:190:20:21

I think so but Janine reckons she's just got a cold.

0:20:210:20:23

I don't know, I'm a bit worried about her.

0:20:230:20:25

If you're a bit worried about her, stop faffing around with your nails and tell me where they are!

0:20:250:20:30

Where are those ducks? Are they hiding?

0:20:300:20:33

Where's Jemima's friends, baby?

0:20:360:20:38

Where are they?

0:20:390:20:40

PHONE RINGS

0:20:450:20:47

You don't have to decide right now. Today.

0:20:530:20:56

If you don't do it,

0:20:570:20:58

then he just goes back to needing a donor, like he already was.

0:20:580:21:02

You found that online as well, yeah?

0:21:040:21:06

He's only known that he needed this for a few weeks.

0:21:080:21:11

Dex, he has waited to be your dad for 20 years.

0:21:110:21:14

So let him be one. Just talk to him.

0:21:150:21:17

He's not well, Abs.

0:21:170:21:19

And what kind of son does that make me?

0:21:190:21:21

One that is brave enough to tell him the truth.

0:21:210:21:23

We can look at the duckies later, darling...

0:21:290:21:31

Hey!

0:21:360:21:37

I've got you!

0:21:450:21:46

What happened? I've got you.

0:21:460:21:48

OK, guys. Take it easy. Nice one.

0:21:500:21:53

Eh, mate, you was not wrong. That bed is proper sick.

0:21:550:21:58

Happy sailing in it... Nice one, man. You take it easy.

0:21:580:22:01

Later on.

0:22:010:22:02

You just conned Fatboy. That's the nutjob's old bed.

0:22:030:22:06

Oi, what have I told you about using that word?

0:22:060:22:08

And it wasn't a con. It was a deal.

0:22:080:22:10

She was happy to get rid of it. He's happy to buy it.

0:22:100:22:13

And if I make a bit on the way, I'm happy as well, ain't I?

0:22:130:22:16

SIREN APPROACHES

0:22:160:22:18

You have to stay. And protect us. You made enough money now.

0:22:180:22:22

No dads ever stay with us. And my other granddad's dead.

0:22:220:22:25

I will protect you...

0:22:250:22:27

And your other granddad, he'd have loved you, just as much as I do.

0:22:270:22:31

He was a character, old Frank Butcher...

0:22:310:22:33

Says he was a pilchard in the garden.

0:22:330:22:35

Yeah, he was.

0:22:350:22:37

But he had a smile that could light up a lamp-post.

0:22:370:22:39

One smile from him,

0:22:390:22:41

and he could get anyone to give him anything. Just like yours.

0:22:410:22:45

PHONE RINGS

0:22:490:22:52

Tell them. All right, all right, I will. But not on the phone.

0:22:520:22:57

I'll do it face to face. I owe them that much.

0:22:580:23:02

So I'm thinking singles' nights.

0:23:080:23:10

What you talking about? Speed-dating?

0:23:100:23:12

That's a bit sad, ain't it? No. It's going to be classy.

0:23:120:23:14

And plus for those that are manager's mates,

0:23:140:23:17

you get first dibs, bruv. You know so, you interested?

0:23:170:23:19

What, in you? Huh?

0:23:190:23:21

You offering, Fats? I didn't know you felt that way.

0:23:210:23:25

No. No... Actually, come to think about it.

0:23:250:23:28

No. So you're not into... Are you into women or are you not...?

0:23:280:23:31

Because it doesn't matter who you're into.

0:23:310:23:34

So, it's a bit early for you to be drinking, innit?

0:23:420:23:46

Alfie lets me come in here for small change.

0:23:460:23:48

OK. Well.

0:23:480:23:50

I'm the manager now, so...

0:23:510:23:53

You're manager?

0:23:530:23:54

That's what you've always wanted.

0:23:550:23:57

Yeah, it is... Hey, that is some bachelor bed you ordered. Firm. Bouncy.

0:23:590:24:04

You wasted no time getting the lady-catching den ready, then?

0:24:060:24:09

I hope you enjoy it.

0:24:110:24:12

Nice one.

0:24:190:24:20

Look, it's sweet of you to check on me but I'm fine.

0:24:230:24:27

Really. Good. But I... We. We need your help.

0:24:270:24:30

25, mate. No. I ain't paying 25 for delivery. I'll give you 20.

0:24:340:24:37

All right, come on. Is that your granddaughter?

0:24:370:24:41

Tiff? It's just it's against regulations, so...

0:24:420:24:45

What you doing? Getting money. So you'll stay.

0:24:450:24:48

You don't beg, darling. We did. When we were on the streets. Mum taught us...

0:24:480:24:52

Come on, people are looking. Get up. You said it was OK. Come on. This how you make your money?

0:24:520:24:56

You said it was OK. What were you doing?

0:24:560:24:58

Ain't you messed with enough members of this family already? It's not what it looks like.

0:24:580:25:02

Dex. Mate, it's your dad.

0:25:040:25:06

We can borrow one of...

0:25:070:25:08

She's asleep.

0:25:160:25:17

Good.

0:25:170:25:18

I would never ever have forgiven myself if...

0:25:200:25:23

I know, I know, I know. It's hard. It's so hard.

0:25:250:25:27

You were exhausted. Alice said, you were exhausted.

0:25:270:25:30

She just... she wouldn't stop crying...

0:25:300:25:34

Sorry... Thank you.

0:25:340:25:35

She could have died.

0:25:380:25:40

Get off me.

0:25:410:25:43

There you go. You admit it?

0:25:430:25:45

No. No, I'm sorry. I can't do it. You'll have to find someone else.

0:25:490:25:53

But I trust you to look after her. I told you. I can't do it, OK.

0:25:530:25:59

I can't do it because I'm busy working. For Phil. I know. But he agreed. He obviously trusts you too.

0:25:590:26:06

Ronnie, I know what it is like for people to stare at you, you know.

0:26:060:26:10

And be told that you can't look after your kid.

0:26:100:26:12

Well, I'm sure you've proved them wrong. Yes, I did. But it was hard, all right?

0:26:120:26:16

I had to beg the courts to give me a chance.

0:26:160:26:18

No-one thought I could do it.

0:26:180:26:20

I bet you're a really good mum.

0:26:200:26:21

Yeah, I bet you was too... I know you was.

0:26:210:26:25

When she got taken from me, I went mad.

0:26:250:26:27

I completely lost it. I did crazy stuff, just like you did.

0:26:270:26:30

I'm sorry.

0:26:320:26:34

I'm sure work can manage for a bit without me anyway, so...

0:26:340:26:37

Look, I'm sorry I couldn't help, OK.

0:26:370:26:39

Do you want to hold her?

0:26:430:26:45

I trust you.

0:26:450:26:46

Look, Ronnie, you wasn't a monster. You was a mum.

0:26:470:26:50

She's beautiful.

0:26:550:26:57

It was one second. And it could have happened to anyone.

0:27:010:27:05

It happened to you, Janine. It happened to you.

0:27:050:27:08

You know, I'm saddened but I'm not surprised.

0:27:080:27:11

Cos I really did think that you may have something in your heart. For your child.

0:27:110:27:14

I do. I love her. You ignored her when she was ill. You turned down help.

0:27:140:27:18

No, no, no, wait... What are you even talking about, Michael? You're twisting this.

0:27:180:27:22

No, I'm not. You don't have a shred of a mother's instinct, do you?

0:27:220:27:25

And this is proof positive. Fine. OK, you can say whatever you like, all right.

0:27:250:27:28

But you will not take away my little girl.

0:27:280:27:31

Do you think there's any judge,

0:27:310:27:33

or decent rational human being would allow you to keep her?

0:27:330:27:36

So thank you. Because you've just given me everything.

0:27:390:27:42

Mum!

0:27:480:27:49

Oh, baby. Mum, is he all right?

0:27:490:27:51

I thought we'd lost him.

0:27:510:27:53

Dexter's here, Sam.

0:27:540:27:56

His lungs are filling with fluid and his kidneys are failing.

0:27:560:27:59

Look, the doctors think that they're going to move the operation.

0:27:590:28:02

They want it to be sooner. Could even be tomorrow.

0:28:020:28:05

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