16/01/2014 EastEnders


16/01/2014

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Not here...!

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HE CHUCKLES

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Oi!

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Suppose you think that's funny, do you? Keying my motor!

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-That's it, you're sacked!

-Oh, Max...

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Oh, Max, nothing. I ain't putting up with him any more.

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-So that's it, you're out, you understand?

-Loud and clear.

-Good.

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See you later. Love of my life.

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Love of my life(!) It's like that, is it?

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None of your business.

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David...

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You all right?

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Let me guess...you finally found out what Phil was up to?

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Well, I got the truth out of him...

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..but now I'm wishing I hadn't.

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So, what you going to do?

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I mean, if he told you the truth, the ball's in your court now.

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Bottom line is, do you love him?

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Yeah...

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I might be the biggest fool under the sun but, yeah,

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yeah, I still love him.

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I can't blame him for what happened.

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Linda...?

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Are you, erm, are you doing anything later?

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No.

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Well, there's somewhere I need to go ...and I can't face going alone.

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RADIO COMMENTARY

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Come on... Come on baby...! Come on...!

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I could have run that quicker meself! Stupid.

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You all right?

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You still here, then?

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Yeah. What's that supposed to mean?

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Well, I'm on my stall, flogging dresses like I do.

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Worrying about paying the bills cos my fella's not doing

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very well in that department...

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And then along comes Mick.

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OK. Right...

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Asking how your "plans" are coming along...

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Yes, Kat. Listen, sweetheart, calm down.

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-I was going to tell you...

-What - you're going to Australia and you didn't think of mentioning it?

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Spencer... Spencer's got this great opportunity.

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He's opening a new bar he wants me to come in, help him open it.

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He's got some rich bloke throwing bundles at it, be quids in. Kat, we're talking thousands here.

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You're talking the other side of the world!

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Kat, it's a chance we can't afford to miss, sweetheart.

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Come on, eh?

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HE SIGHS

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When does he need someone by?

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OK...

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I'd need to fly out tomorrow.

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-Tomorrow?!

-OK, listen, it's only for a month, all right?

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I haven't got the money for the ticket at the moment.

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-Oh, you ain't got it yet?

-No.

-Oh.

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For a minute there you had me worried.

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SHE CHUCKLES

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I've not been able to face coming here...

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CHURCH BELL TOLLS

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I got as far as the cemetery gates...

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Why now?

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I think it's time to let go...

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Me and Phil...

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I've had some decisions to make.

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Oh, it's so hard...

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..letting go of someone you've loved so much.

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God bless, baby...

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PHONE RING TONE

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Know what you need? A night at the Vic, just the girls.

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Let your hair down, eh?

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-Good idea.

-Come on.

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So, what are you going to do now he's sacked you?

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Well, I've got a couple of irons in the fire.

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Can you get on with Max, for my sake?

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-SHE SHRIEKS

-Yes, dear.

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He stayed in her bed.

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It's just going to end in disaster.

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Right, girls, what are you doing tonight?

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-And whatever it is, change your plans.

-Why?

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Ladies' night at the Vic.

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We drink, we gossip, we let our hair down and we have a laugh.

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Spread the word. I'm inviting anything in a skirt!

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She seems all right. It's been ages since I let me hair down.

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Hold on, what's this about your mum and David?

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And what's happened to Masood?

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Can I help you, love?

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RADIO PLAYS

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SPANNER DROPS

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Where you been?

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I had somewhere to go.

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I, er, I tried calling you.

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I wanted to know where I stand.

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You stand where you always stand, Phil.

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Where's that?

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Wherever it is, I'm standing right next to you.

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HE SIGHS

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Are you, er... Are you sure? Are you sure this is what you want?

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I went to the cemetery today.

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I said goodbye to Dennis.

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Now, I'm not saying I'm never going to think of him

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but I'm putting him in the past.

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And I'm putting my trust in you.

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Don't make me regret my decision.

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I won't, Sharon.

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I won't, I promise.

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The thing is... he went over...

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Yes, handsome?

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Could I get a lager and an orange juice, please?

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I'll have a beer, please.

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You got a problem?

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No...

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I reckon four or five of us, bit of Texas, seven-card stud,

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maybe throw in a bit of triple draw.

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-Fixed limit?

-Nah, nah, nah, anything goes.

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Yeah? All right, I tell you what... I'm all over that. I'm all over it.

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-Lovely!

-What's this?

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-Poker, tonight, in here.

-No, no, not tonight - I'm having a girl's night.

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Have it tomorrow night.

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What? No, no, Mick, it's got to be tonight...

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You can have it at mine if you like.

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Are you sure?

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Yeah. I don't gamble? I'm the clean-living, devout Muslim, am I?

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See where that got me. Seven o'clock, right?

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Yeah...yeah, nice one, Mas.

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Oh, here he is.

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What you going to do - beg for your job back?

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It was me that keyed the car.

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I was angry, it was stupid

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and I will pay for everything to be put right.

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I'm very sorry.

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David Wicks apologises...

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Well, yeah, you're right, you will be paying for it.

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So, if that's everything, you can get lost.

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No, I can't.

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Look, Max... Carol and me are going to make a go of it...

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and you need to know that I am not going to hurt her.

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All right?

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It's important to her that me and you get on.

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Mate, I don't think it's up to you to tell me

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what's important for my sister.

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-There's things you don't know.

-What, about you and her?

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Don't think I want to know, thank you very much.

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She's got breast cancer.

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Well, she ain't. She ain't got breast cancer, has she?

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What you talking about? She would have told me.

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You serious?

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She'll be all right. She'll be fine.

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Yeah, yeah, course she will.

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She'll get treatment and they'll get rid of it.

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-Like Tanya. She beat it.

-Yeah, exactly.

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Look, she's been going through a lot, Max, and I've been

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supporting her...

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And, well, I've got a lot on my plate, ain't I?

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Not that that excuses my behaviour but...

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..that's the reason I want to buy Jack's half of this place.

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So I've got something solid for her.

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I've got 100 grand.

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50 for me to buy in and another 50 for me

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and you to turn it around.

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Come on, you want what's best for your kids, don't you?

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Well, I want what's best for Carol and Bianca.

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We can be united...

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..as a family.

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Give me this chance, Max.

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Please.

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Mr Mas, what's Tam going to say?

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He's not here, is he?

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He left me...

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like my daughter,

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like my wife...

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..my brother,

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both my sons and my girlfriend...

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Which is a good thing, isn't it?

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Because I'm my own man now...

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KNOCKING ON DOOR

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Eh...?

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And this man likes to gamble and he likes beer.

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KNOCKING GETS LOUDER

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ALL CHATTER

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Linda said drinks on her. Let's get slaughtered, shall we?

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I'm going to want a drink, aren't I?

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You can have one, can't you?

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If I have one, I won't be able to stop.

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I can't believe I let you talk me into this.

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You're turning into a right bore, do you know that?

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You going to join us?

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What for?

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Ladies' night. I've got champagne on ice.

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What's the catch?

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No catch, just me getting to know my ladies... come on.

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Oh Denise, Denise... don't go...

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-I'm just looking for Ian.

-He's playing poker, he's with Mick.

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-Oh...

-Come and join us. We're having a few drinks.

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Not seen you since your engagement party. Come on... sit down...

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-Well, I've got to get back...

-Over you come, that's it, there you go...

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What you looking at?

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Nothing much.

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Oh, oh, this is lovely... all girls together.

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We used to have ladies' nights all the time at my mum's pub.

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Now, I've got to know Sharon - love you, darling - but I want to

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get to know all my ladies, so let's have some drinks and some fun, yeah?

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LOUD MUNCHING

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Call...

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Fold.

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Come on, you beauty! Look at that. Come to Daddy!

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Oh, trips, trips, trips.

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ALFIE CHUCKLES

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HE EXHALES

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ALL SHOUT

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He's nicked a flush.

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-Oh, it feels so good to be back...

-He's nicked a flush.

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Come on! Thank you.

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I tell you what, boys, I needed this... booze and cards...

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you have no idea what it's like to be outnumbered by women 24/7.

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Don't get me wrong, I love women but it's

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so nice to have a night off of it.

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Amen to that.

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Just, don't rub it in, though - Masood got dumped yesterday.

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Masood's what? You split up with Carol?

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Who told you?

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Well, Carol told Bianca and... sorry, Mas.

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Yeah, well, we were fine until David Wicks turned up.

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That's what he does...

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charms his way into their heads and then into their beds...

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Me and Bianca are gutted for you though, Mas.

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He ruined my first marriage. If Carol is stupid enough to fall for him then you're

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-better off without her.

-Ian, shut up... eh?

-Alfie, can you get dealing...

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-cos I need to take some more money off you.

-I'd like to see you try.

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-Come on, show me the money, ladies, show me the money.

-Let's liven it up. Come on.

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Small. Small.

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Boy, did you hear Liam? Said he didn't need a babysitter?

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Showing off cos that Cindy's around.

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Oh, yeah?

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If he had plans of that sort he's going to be very disappointed -

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TJ's up there, bless him, gooseberry.

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LAUGHTER

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-Who's go is it?

-Lauren's go.

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All right, Johnny...

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..have you ever had sex with a boy or girl?

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Lauren...

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What? The rules are you can ask anything.

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No, it's OK... no, I haven't.

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I've kissed both but nothing more.

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But you want to, don't you? He wants to.

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Lauren, you've had your question, all right. It's my turn.

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Sorry, Johnny.

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Right, Lauren...

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..who's the best lover you've ever had?

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CHATTER AND LAUGHTER

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Hey, hey, oi, oi, go easy...

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I'm having fun.

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You set a date yet?

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Oh, no. No. Not yet.

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You started looking at dresses? I love a wedding dress.

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Don't you, Nora?

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Cora.

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Oh, what am I like?! Sorry.

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-You married?

-Widowed.

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Awww... let me get you another drink.

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Cora, I am sorry and I really do appreciate you not saying

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anything about the other night.

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Like I said, I'm no gossip...

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so if you're at peace kissing other men.

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It was one man, it was one time.

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It always starts with one time.

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Just spit it out, will you?

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What?

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You've been off with me all day.

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And you know why.

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Yeah, I know that you're not keen on me and your dad being together.

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I am not the only one. What did Sonia say yesterday?

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Well, she said, you know, as long as I'm happy.

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Oh, yeah, well, she don't have to deal with the fallout, does she?

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There's not going to be any fallout, all right?

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We're together and we're going to make it work.

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I didn't finish with Mas just because I wanted...

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What, Carol...? You and Mas are finished?

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Oh, I'm so sorry. You made such a lovely couple.

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What's this?

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Mas and Carol have finished.

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That's a shame. He's a decent bloke. You don't get many of them round here.

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- Yeah, well... - Was he a cheater, Carol?

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-He never cheated on you, did he?

-No, it was just...

-No, he never did.

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She just dumped him to get back with my dad.

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-Oh...

-What, you're back with David?

0:15:020:15:05

-Which one's David?

-Tall, dark...

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Looks a bit like George Clooney?

0:15:070:15:08

Alfie looks more like George Clooney than he does!

0:15:080:15:11

No, he don't! If anyone looks like George Clooney it's my dad. Alfie don't look

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-nothing like George...

-Poor Masood, though.

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I'm sorry, no offence, Carol but, you know, you've got to feel for the guy,

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because his wife leaves him and then you dump him.

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No, hang on, hang on, it's not her fault.

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Oh right. She just couldn't resist David Wicks, yeah?

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-No, no, no, she's just got a lot on her plate, ain't you, at the moment!

-It's all right, Bianca.

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-Maybe you should tell them.

-No, don't.

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Right, if you've all finished discussing my love life,

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I would like another drink, please.

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Of course, Carol. Tina, pass me that bottle.

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Tina, pass it to me.

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Give it. Tina!

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Listen, Kat, I was thinking. Me and you could have a right load of money now, you know.

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If Alfie and Terry have won the whole...

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Alfie Moon winning, yeah?

0:15:560:15:58

I've got more chance of giving birth to Prince George's future wife

0:15:580:16:01

than him winning enough money for a ticket to Australia.

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Me dad was a cabbie, so it's just natural for me to be a cabbie,

0:16:070:16:10

I suppose...

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Like that with us. Me grandad. Me dad.

0:16:110:16:13

All had the stall, now me boy's got it.

0:16:130:16:15

-Check.

-What about you, Mick?

0:16:150:16:17

What, the old man?

0:16:170:16:18

What was he? Check.

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Same as he is now, a complete wrong 'un.

0:16:200:16:22

Like father, like son, eh?

0:16:220:16:24

Are we playing poker or happy families?

0:16:240:16:26

Here we go.

0:16:260:16:27

I'm out...

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I need to use your khazi.

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-Upstairs.

-I might be a while.

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That's what happens when you smash that Bombay mix.

0:16:350:16:38

CHUCKLING

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£500...

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..all in.

0:17:020:17:03

That's too rich for me, mate. I'm binning that.

0:17:060:17:08

Alfie, come on, mate, this is just a little game of friendly poker.

0:17:080:17:12

Ian, we agreed there's no limit...

0:17:120:17:14

..and you won't beat this hand.

0:17:140:17:16

Take an IOU?

0:17:300:17:31

You're having a laugh, ain't you, Mas? No.

0:17:320:17:35

I think I've got some money in the kitchen...

0:17:380:17:40

You finished?

0:17:470:17:48

What are you doing? That's Tam's uni fund.

0:17:510:17:54

I've got the winning hand. There's real money on that table.

0:17:540:17:58

Mr Mas... Mr Mas, you cannot be serious, man.

0:17:580:18:01

Oh! I can't get my hand on green...

0:18:100:18:13

Go on...

0:18:130:18:16

Yes..

0:18:160:18:17

Right, Johnny. Left hand on green...

0:18:170:18:21

-Oh!

-Oi, oi!

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LAUGHTER

0:18:260:18:27

Do us a favour and send that to my mum.

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She'd love to see us like this!

0:18:290:18:31

LAUGHTER

0:18:310:18:33

Things just got interesting...

0:18:390:18:40

I need to go to the khazi.

0:18:490:18:51

-Mick's in there.

-Yeah, I'll go outside, won't I...

0:18:510:18:54

Excuse me.

0:18:540:18:55

Yeah, he's got a point, actually.

0:18:580:19:01

You and Phil OK now?

0:19:060:19:08

Yeah, yeah, we're getting there.

0:19:080:19:10

You know, you forget what it's like, working the bar.

0:19:100:19:14

Any time you want a job, you just let me know.

0:19:140:19:17

There's a couple over there I wouldn't mind getting rid of.

0:19:170:19:20

SHARON LAUGHS

0:19:200:19:22

Look at them, they'll be sharing friendship bracelets next and having sleepovers.

0:19:220:19:26

You really hate her, don't you?

0:19:260:19:28

I don't like the way she's made herself the centre of Mick's life.

0:19:280:19:31

She's his wife, what do you expect? Anyway, I meant Sharon...

0:19:310:19:36

I think you still like Phil.

0:19:360:19:37

You want to keep your teeth in your head, you'll keep your thoughts to yourself, all right?

0:19:370:19:42

Stop it. Stop making me feel guilty! Just cos you're up the duff.

0:19:420:19:45

You're pregnant?

0:19:450:19:47

Sorry, Kat...

0:19:470:19:49

CAROL: Stop drinking, Bianca.

0:19:490:19:51

I'm pregnant, yeah...

0:19:510:19:52

I knew it! I've been watching you pretend to drink.

0:19:520:19:55

See, that's why I haven't said anything cos it's early days yet...

0:19:550:19:58

Yeah, because she's having twins!

0:19:580:20:00

Why don't you put an announcement in the flamin' paper!

0:20:000:20:03

-Kat's pregnant with twins.

-Oh, Kat, that is great news.

-Oh, that's fantastic news!

0:20:030:20:09

Congratulations. Oh, we need a toast, let's have a toast.

0:20:090:20:13

Oh, hang on you can't drink, can you?

0:20:130:20:15

I'm all right with orange juice. Cheers.

0:20:150:20:17

I smoked and drank all through my pregnancies, didn't affect my girls.

0:20:170:20:21

Oh, no, only one got cancer and the other one was a junkie.

0:20:210:20:24

Oh come on, Kat, just the one, eh? Wet the baby's head.

0:20:240:20:27

-Two babies' heads!

-Twin babies... rather you than me, love.

0:20:270:20:31

Yeah, it's all right when you're young and you've got energy but when you're at our age...

0:20:310:20:35

Controlling two toddlers...

0:20:350:20:37

To Kat and her babies. ALL: Cheers, Kat.

0:20:370:20:40

Cheers. Congrats.

0:20:400:20:44

Alfie, Alfie, listen, you've got to let Mas win.

0:20:450:20:47

What for?

0:20:470:20:48

Because he's gambling with Tam's uni money.

0:20:480:20:50

HE SIGHS

0:20:520:20:54

I just want you to be happy...

0:20:590:21:01

I am happy, darling.

0:21:010:21:02

Just really happy and... you know what?

0:21:020:21:05

If being with my dad makes you happy then that's good...

0:21:050:21:09

Oh, blimey, she's off!

0:21:090:21:11

I'm really happy. Oh shut up, Kat...!

0:21:110:21:14

Cos you, I just want you to be happy as well.

0:21:160:21:19

Cos I know you are really happy.

0:21:190:21:23

Cos you've got them two babies in there...

0:21:230:21:27

And I know that's making you really happy.

0:21:280:21:31

Hello, this is Auntie Bianca...

0:21:330:21:36

you don't even know

0:21:360:21:37

but you've got the best mum in the world, you don't even know it yet...

0:21:370:21:41

LAUGHTER

0:21:410:21:43

I knew a woman once...

0:21:440:21:46

she had three sets of twins in three years.

0:21:460:21:50

She used to take them out walking on leads.

0:21:510:21:53

It was the only way she could control them.

0:21:530:21:56

-Leads?

-No, reins. I had reins with Denny.

0:21:560:21:58

Surprised you took them off.

0:21:580:22:00

No, I mean leads.

0:22:000:22:02

Her dad ran a pet shop and they all had dog leads and collars...

0:22:030:22:06

LAUGHTER

0:22:080:22:10

Right, I've one more bottle of bubbly on ice...

0:22:130:22:16

CHEERING

0:22:160:22:18

Oi, Linda... I've got something I want to say to you...

0:22:180:22:21

Shirley...

0:22:210:22:22

Shut your mouth. I'm not talking to you, all right...

0:22:220:22:26

You...

0:22:290:22:31

You're all right.

0:22:310:22:33

I mean, I know, you know, we don't like each other but one thing

0:22:340:22:39

I do know is that you're good for my Mick...and...

0:22:390:22:44

..that's important to me.

0:22:440:22:46

Cos I brought him up...

0:22:460:22:47

And you make him happy...

0:22:500:22:52

-..and he is happy.

-Aww, Shirl...

0:22:520:22:54

And you're... good to your kids.

0:22:560:22:59

I think you smother Johnny a little bit, I mean, it's no surprise

0:22:590:23:02

he's turned out to be gay...

0:23:020:23:05

but, you know, he's a good kid and I like him...

0:23:050:23:10

Erm, I suppose what I'm trying to say...

0:23:110:23:14

..is you're not that bad after all...

0:23:160:23:19

LINDA SOBS

0:23:190:23:20

-You don't have to cry about it...

-Oh, come here babe, come here...

0:23:200:23:23

Is she all right?

0:23:230:23:25

No, I'm fine, I'm fine.

0:23:250:23:28

I told Sharon I was throwing tonight for her but it's not true...

0:23:310:23:36

This afternoon on the news...

0:23:390:23:41

..they said a soldier had been killed in Afghanistan.

0:23:430:23:46

And you hear it and you don't know...

0:23:490:23:51

You don't know what battalion... you just... you don't know anything.

0:23:530:23:57

All you can do is wait for the phone to ring

0:23:590:24:02

or for a knock at the door...

0:24:020:24:03

And I didn't say anything to Mick cos...

0:24:060:24:08

Well, after two years you just...

0:24:090:24:12

..you get on with it.

0:24:120:24:13

But... I needed to take my mind off it, so...

0:24:150:24:18

It won't be Lee...

0:24:200:24:22

I know, I know, I know, cos they'd have told us by now...

0:24:220:24:26

but it goes on and on in your head...

0:24:260:24:30

I just want my baby back...

0:24:330:24:36

He will be back. He will be back...

0:24:360:24:38

He'll be back soon...

0:24:380:24:39

SHE SOBS

0:24:400:24:42

Sorry... I'm sorry...

0:24:420:24:43

-KAT:

-Don't be daft...

0:24:440:24:46

I had this group of mates back in Watford and they understood

0:24:460:24:51

when I needed to just blot it out...

0:24:510:24:53

Well, now you've got mates here now, Linda.

0:24:530:24:56

Yeah. That's right...

0:24:560:24:58

I hope so...

0:24:580:24:59

I feel sick...

0:25:000:25:02

LAUGHTER

0:25:030:25:05

HE SIGHS

0:25:240:25:27

Call...

0:25:270:25:28

-Oh, he's got queens and tens.

-He's got a full house, ain't he?

-Alfie, Alfie.

0:25:300:25:33

Queens and tens. Alfie.

0:25:330:25:36

It's on you. It's on you. It is on you.

0:25:360:25:38

Nice.

0:25:390:25:41

Trips.

0:25:590:26:00

EXHALING AND CHATTERING

0:26:000:26:02

ALL: Whoa!

0:26:020:26:04

-Oh, leave it out,

-Oh, Masood...

0:26:040:26:06

Come to Daddy. That's it!

0:26:060:26:09

-Who's the man?!

-That's unbelievable. You having that?

0:26:090:26:12

Don't you worry about it, boys. That's all mine now.

0:26:120:26:15

Lovely.

0:26:150:26:17

-Unbelievable.

-You must be gutted.

0:26:170:26:19

Masood, unlucky.

0:26:190:26:20

So, that's that, then.

0:26:280:26:30

Yep. You won't regret it, Max. Partners?

0:26:300:26:34

LAUGHTER

0:26:380:26:40

I just... Can I have a kebab...?

0:26:400:26:43

You can have a cup of tea and a paracetamol.

0:26:430:26:45

ALFIE: Kat... Kat...?

0:26:450:26:49

Hey...!

0:26:490:26:51

You won...

0:26:510:26:52

Yes. Australia, here I come! AUSTRALIAN ACCENT: All right.

0:26:520:26:55

So, you're definitely going... never mind me or Tommy...

0:26:550:26:58

Kat, sweetheart... we need the money and this is big time.

0:26:580:27:01

And you know I want the best for our babies.

0:27:010:27:03

You know that.

0:27:030:27:04

We're just going to miss you.

0:27:040:27:06

I know.

0:27:060:27:08

I know, all right?

0:27:080:27:10

Just don't invest in a kangaroo farm or something, yeah!

0:27:110:27:14

SHE CHUCKLES

0:27:140:27:15

OK. Come on.

0:27:160:27:18

-Have a nice time, won't you?

-Lovely to see you.

0:27:180:27:20

Thanks for a lovely night.

0:27:200:27:22

See you soon, bye.

0:27:220:27:24

-You look like you had fun.

-Yeah...

0:27:240:27:26

So, I reckon it's time I started thinking about my future.

0:27:290:27:34

If we're starting a new life, I think you need to invest in me.

0:27:340:27:38

What do you want?

0:27:410:27:43

I want my own place... a pub, bar.

0:27:430:27:46

I want to be a landlady again.

0:27:480:27:49

HE CHUCKLES

0:27:500:27:52

I can't believe you done that, Mr Mas... I mean, how could you do that?!

0:27:520:27:56

-Tam has been saving for months and you spent it in a second.

-I had a good hand.

0:27:560:27:59

Yeah, but it wasn't good enough, was it? I mean...

0:27:590:28:01

DOOR CLOSES

0:28:010:28:03

Tam...

0:28:080:28:09

Yeah, I decided to come home.

0:28:090:28:12

Oi, I can walk up the stairs.

0:28:120:28:14

Come on, keep going...

0:28:140:28:16

BIANCA SHRIEKS

0:28:160:28:17

What was that?

0:28:170:28:18

It's all right, she just fell down a couple of steps...

0:28:180:28:22

-Why am I on the floor?

-Cos you're drunk.

0:28:220:28:25

Hey.

0:28:340:28:36

Looks like Bianca's had a good night.

0:28:360:28:38

What are you doing here?

0:28:380:28:39

I was just...

0:28:490:28:50

David's told me.

0:28:510:28:52

Max...

0:28:550:28:57

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