27/01/2014 EastEnders

Bit early.

Breakfast.

You'll get fat if you eat all them.

They're for my dad.

Nice.

Now it finally feels like our pub.

Our pub with rising damp.

You'll be back in time for opening, won't you?

Yeah, of course. It's a flying visit.

-Where's Shirley?

-She'll be here. She won't let us down.

Going to break the habit of a lifetime, is she?

-This has got to work, Mick.

-I know.

I'm sorry, I'm just worried.

On top of everything else,

I'm on pins waiting for that phone to ring and for Environmental Health to decide our fate.

It's like everything's stacked against us.

I don't feel like we can enjoy any of it.

We will. By the end of today, it'll be sorted.

I promise.

-You all right?

-All right, Sis?

-You nearly ready?

-No. For what?

-You've forgotten, haven't you? It's Dad?

Oh, yeah... Listen, I've had some motors come in.

-Can we do it tomorrow?

-Dot's away at Nigel's for the week and she's asked me to check in on him.

-Oh, don't worry. I'll go on my own like I normally do.

-Don't be like that, Sis. It's not fair, is it?

-You sure he's got money?

-Yeah. He won twenty grand on the Premium Bonds.

Yeah, but you said that was two years ago. He's probably blown it on the horses and beer.

No, he hasn't... I saw him a few months back,

and he said if I needed a bit of help I just had to ask...

Carol! Come on! I'll take you.

-Sure it's not putting you out?

-Just get in the car, will ya?

They're going to see their dad.

-You don't have to come, you know...

-It's all right.

I can handle him.

25 years.

I know.

-If we didn't need the money...

-I said it's all right.

Let's just get there, eh?

-How come we never go and see him?

-He's a difficult man.

-Yeah, but he's Dad's dad.

-Not all families are close.

-Maybe we will be now.

-We never used to see Auntie Shirley and now we live with her.

-No, I hate him.

Dad told me about him once when he was drunk.

Like the horrible things he used to say to him and Auntie Tina. That ain't right.

Well, not everyone has a dad as good as yours. You want to remember that sometimes.

PHONE RINGS

Queen Vic?

Oh, hello, Grandma.

-Mum's just nipped out...

-Why don't you want to talk to Grandma?

I just can't face her today.

She'll ask how the pub is and I don't want to lie to her.

What's Lady Di eating now?

-One of those pies! I thought they'd all gone!

-Get it off her!

-She can't eat dog pie! That's cannibalism!

-Oh, drop! Lady Di, drop it!

-It's like Silence Of The Lambs!

-She's going to be sick! Get her outside!

-No way!

Come on, outside.

Like I haven't got enough to deal with today!

-Hi.

-Mr and Mrs Allen?

They knew what time we were coming.

I'm sure they won't be long.

Great(!)

Is everything all right?

Everything's fine.

Nothing's happened, has it?

No, for a change, nothing's happened. I'm just tired, Max.

Well, we'll be in soon.

All I've done the past few weeks is wait,

wait around on other people and now I'm sitting here

ready to paint on a smile and pretend that everything's all right.

Listen, you ain't going to tell Dad, are you?

Why shouldn't I?

-Carol.

-No, why shouldn't I?

Why should he live in blissful ignorance

when my family are having to deal with it?

I've been trying to protect Liam and the kids

but they're going to find out at some point.

I mean, and Dad - we all tiptoe around him but who's going to protect them?!

He's sick, ain't he?

So am I.

I can't sleep at night, you know, I'm lying there,

waiting for something to happen.

What choice do I have?

And there's Dad, he's always been so selfish,

looking out for number one and we still have to pretend like we care and protect him.

Yeah, but you do care.

Only cos he's my dad. Only cos I have to.

Why shouldn't he know the truth?

Proud of yourself, are you?

Serves you right if you're sick, you greedy mutt...

-Talking to yourself, Linda? First sign of madness!

-Oh, hello...

Everything all right? I noticed the pub was shut all weekend.

Everything's fine. We were finishing off the refurb.

Perfect. Got it just how we want it now. Going to open up today with a bang.

-Look forward to seeing it.

-First drink's on us.

Make sure mine's a large one, then. See you later.

Yeah, bye.

DOG VOMITS AGAIN Uh!

Looks worse every time you see it.

Can you stop being like that? He's our dad.

This is where we grew up. This is us.

It's not me.

-Right, come on, then, let's do it.

-I'm staying in the car.

-Oh, don't be like that, Shirl.

-Come on, just come up for a bit, show your face.

I said I'm staying in the car!

I should never have come here in the first place.

Come on, then, Teen. Let's get this out the way.

Sticking her nose in, acting like she cares.

Well, if she cared that much she wouldn't be opening her own bar at the end of the road.

20 years we've waited for a pub of our own.

20 years of your grandma breathing down our necks,

telling us what to do.

Finally we get it and we could lose it all.

Should I get me violin? Look, you've got a pub.

There's a few problems. Big deal.

-Thanks for the support!

-Here, look at this...

-It's not another cat playing a piano, is it?

-What am I looking at?

It's about breeding bulldogs.

Oh, no, no, that sounds like a lot of bother.

Look how much they go for each...

-Litter of five or six, you're talking...

-Is this right?

Lady Di, they're going to pimp you out!

-Should I e-mail the site?

-Let me see what your dad says when he gets back.

-It's a good idea, though, Johnny.

-Why don't you phone him about it?

Oh, no, no. I'm not interrupting him. Not today.

He hardly slept last night.

You've no idea how much he's dreading seeing his dad.

Is he really that bad?

The man's a monster.

TV ON

Surprise! Hello, Dad.

Bleedin' hell! You trying to give me a heart attack?

-What you doing here?

-Thought we'd surprise you.

We?

-Dad.

-Well, there's a turn-up.

Come here, son.

How are you?

You look well.

-I told him you'd be pleased to see him.

-Course I'm pleased.

-Here you are, we brought you some beers.

-I can guess whose idea that was.

How's the kids?

I still follow Lee...on the telly.

Find out what his division's doing. Bet you're proud of him.

-I'm proud of all my kids.

-What's the beard for? Lost your shaver?

-I like it.

-It suits you. How's Linda?

She's good.

Still living with her mother, are you?

No, no. We've got our own pub now.

Oh? Where's that, then?

-Walford.

-Walford, eh? Not far from here.

I used to go drinking down there back with the lads.

What's the name of your pub?

Queen Victoria.

Sounds posh. I'll have to make a visit down there.

Sit yourselves down. Turn that rubbish off.

-Here, these beers are warm.

-Oh, sorry.

Not to worry. I've got some in the fridge I 'alf-inched from a funeral the other day.

When you get to my age, all you do is go to funerals.

Sit yourself down if you're stopping.

Quite the turn-up for the books, to see you two little 'uns together.

You bought that for Dad, didn't you? You was only about 12.

-We need to ask him.

-All right, in a bit. We've only just got here.

Yeah, I know, but I want to get it sorted.

Actually, Dad...we've got a bit of a favour to ask.

-Oh, yeah?

-Yeah.

-Let me guess. Mick...

-I'm driving.

-One won't kill you.

You want money, right? Only time I ever see her is when she wants a handout.

That ain't true. You know I like coming to see you.

Having a beer, watching TV, playing cards...

Tina says you had a win on the Premium Bonds.

Yeah. Little nest egg...

I was going to come and see you anyway, Dad, but it's Mick's pub, right...

It's got this rising damp and it's going to be sort of expensive to sort out

-and we thought maybe you could help.

-How much are we talking?

-About ten grand.

-Oh...that bad?

-Didn't think you'd have it.

-Forget about it. We shouldn't have come.

-No, no, I've got it.

Hope you're having some quotes. Not letting some cowboy rip you off?

Yeah. If you could help out... I'd appreciate it.

-And how does Tina come into all this?

-I'm living with Mick now.

-Oh, that's nice.

And what about her outside?

She living with you?

I've seen her. Standing out there like her farts don't smell.

We're all together now.

Oh, that's very nice. So what's she doing out there?

Keeping the motor running for your getaway?

She's a bit churned up, Dad. It's been a long time.

-Yeah, she won't even say hello.

-I told her to come up, didn't I, Mick? You know Shirl.

Oh, yeah. I know Shirl.

You want the money, you can have it, but I want to see her too.

-Tell her to come up.

-This is nothing to do with Shirley.

I need the money and I reckon I'm owed it.

I think it's Shirley's turn to do the asking, don't you?

Aw, look, look, aren't they sweet?

They come out looking like they need an iron.

How many times can she get pregnant in one year? Mum, we could be quids in.

At this rate we might need it. I wish they'd just hurry up and call.

Er, where did we put her pedigree papers?

Dunno.

Well, we'll need them to prove she's proper.

You know, there's a site here that finds the right dog.

You know, like in Fiddler On The Roof. Do you remember?

# Matchmaker, matchmaker Make me a match... #

-That's it!

-Oh, I see. I'm down there setting up and you're up here prancing about

-and making a little sandwich.

-Oh, Nance, Nance, look, look, baby bulldogs.

Rancid. They look like prunes.

You won't say that when they're here, tiny barks, little ears...

I hate baby things, man.

-That's me not being made a grandma any time soon, then.

-Damn straight. You know I don't want kids.

Break it to me gently, why don't you(?)

-I'd like to have kids.

-What are you going to be then, the mum or the dad?

I don't care. I'm going to have kids and when I do, they're going to see

loads of their Grandma Linda and loads of their Grandpa Mick.

Course, cos you'll still be living at home.

I wouldn't mind.

I'd rather have a full house like we had at your grandma's

than be stuck on my own like your dad's dad.

Oh, that ain't going to happen to you.

You're going to be an amazing mum.

-I've just said that.

-Yeah, yeah, but when the time comes, you're going to be fantastic.

Although the thought of your baby stuffed into a tiny tracksuit is...

PHONE RINGS

I'll get it. It's probably your gran again.

Queen Vic.

Yes, this is Linda Carter.

Oh, hello, Mr Brewer. Yes, I've been expecting your call.

Sorry? Would you mind repeating that?

-We're in the clear! It was lamb!

-Not dog?

-Not dog!

Oh, sorry about that. Yeah, no, that's perfectly understandable.

-Thank you for letting me know.

-Nance, we're in the clear. Mum ain't going to prison.

Actually, that has probably has saved me some street cred.

"Oi, Nance, what's your mum in for? Like GBH? Drugs?"

"Nah. Er...selling pies."

-You've no idea how relieved I am!

-Relieved?

Oh, Sharon, we're not open yet.

Well, I couldn't wait to see all the changes.

-Everything all right?

-It couldn't be better.

-Good.

-Nancy, get Sharon a drink on the house.

-Cheers, babe.

-Where'd the dog tag come from?

No idea.

But the minute I see Shirley, I'm going to be having words.

-He can shove his money!

-He'll give it to us. He just wants to see Shirl first.

-It's not going to happen. Let's go.

-How is he?

Yeah, he's on good form. Come on, he wants to see you for a few minutes.

-Tina.

-He misses you, he wants to see you.

-Every time I see him he always asks after you.

-Let's just go home.

Has he got the money?

You don't have to do this, Shirl.

He's ready for you now.

Carol...

Carol, babe, please don't do this, all right?

I know you're angry, but don't take it out on him.

Look, I've spent most of my life hating him, all right?

But he's just an old, sick man now.

What's the point in him knowing?

Plus, I know you, darling. If you tell him, you're going to hate yourself.

Can I have my arm back, please?

Hello, Dad.

Look who I've brought to see you.

You all right, Dad?

DOOR CLOSES

All right, girl?

Look at you.

My Shirley Temple's come home.

We wanted to go back to our roots, a good old cosy East End pub.

We had the paint stripped off the bar, you know,

-get back to the mahogany.

-Nice.

I changed the bar stools.

We recovered the banquettes and we got new curtains.

We want to create a pub where the customers felt

they could bed in for the night.

Come and have a drink, have a chat with mates and neighbours.

-A real focal point for the community.

-Oliver?

A personal touch.

-What do you think?

-Yeah, well, it's lovely. Really nice.

-You should see what we've done in the ladies', that is really special.

-Better go and have a nose, then.

Right, you two! This is it. I can feel it.

A new beginning. Nothing but blue skies from now on!

The Carters are back in business!

Yeah! Your face. Look at your face.

Take the weight off.

25 years, eh?

-Surprised you remembered.

-Course I do.

Look at you, same old Shirl.

You've changed.

Body's giving up, but I've still got it up here.

Bet you think I'm a right state.

I'm an old man, Shirl. Hardly ever go out.

Most days I don't see anyone at all.

And there's the three of you in a pub...

..just ten minutes down the road.

-Let me get you a drink.

-I'm not staying.

Oh, come on, Shirl.

First time I've known you turn down a drink.

Place hasn't changed much, has it? Here.

Remember that time you wanted to paint in here?

And you put the paint lid down on a chair and I sat on it.

You and the kids couldn't stop laughing.

Ruined my best pair of trousers.

Those were good days.

Are you going to give us the money?

I'm talking about us and you have to bring up money.

-You was raised better than that.

-You know what? Forget it.

-This was a mistake.

-Just like your mum.

Things get tough and you run away.

You walked out on your kids, same as she walked out on hers.

Chip off the old block.

You abandoned any more I don't know about?

Have you put any more of yours into care?

-Don't you lay that at my door.

-We were doing fine.

-They was better off in care.

-Try telling Mick that!

I couldn't cope.

I'm not proud of it.

I did what I thought was best for all of us.

They've forgiven me, the little 'uns.

Probably don't even remember.

And the Social Services, they understood.

They saw how hard it was for me.

Have you finished?

You're forgetting that I was there.

-It wasn't my fault.

-No, it never is, is it?

Let's blame Mum for walking out, blame ME for breathing!

Tell you what, I'll get Aunt Babe on the phone and you can blame her.

You leave her where she belongs!

No-one ever tells you about how to be a parent.

All right. I put me hand up.

I did wrong, wrong to the little 'uns, wrong to you.

I'm glad you're all back together again, really glad.

Mind you, they was always close, weren't they? Always us and them.

Except when they wanted something. Bit like now, eh?

Bet it wasn't your idea to come today.

Mick and Tina, always the same, thick as thieves.

-We should go and get her.

-She'll be fine. They're probably talking about the old days.

The good old days? I don't like it.

I don't like leaving her alone with him.

Here. Ten grand.

-Do you hide it under the mattress?

-Don't be daft. Back of the wardrobe.

-You owe me for this.

-I owe you?

-Well, you know.

-I owe you nothing!

This is for Mick.

Might make up for some of the things that you put him through.

You know, it's funny you act so maternal about Mick

when you abandoned your own kids.

Mick's not your son. He's got his own family.

You don't fit in there, Shirley. Mick and Tina,

they don't need looking after no more.

What about your own kids?

Bumped into Dean a few months back.

-What are you talking about?

-He's dropped the O.

Good job, if you ask me. Who wants a name like Deano?

-He's abroad.

-Is he? Well, he wasn't when he sat there.

Having a beer, bit of a chat. Didn't want nothing.

Not like you.

Gave me his number, in case I ever needed anything.

-You're lying.

-Am I?

You can kid yourself all you like. Living with Mick and Linda...

that's not going to last.

That stuck-up cow hates you and Mick's too weak to stand up to her.

Oh, they'll put up with you as long as they need you,

but you're not their family.

Here's your real family. Your son, Shirley.

Mick's going to turn his back on you and then where will you be?

Out in the cold again?

You phone your boy.

-You did the right thing.

-I'm sorry, I...

-Oi. Don't apologise, all right?

-I'm so tired.

-You ain't got to apologise to me.

-Sometimes I feel so angry and I want to lash out at someone.

Yeah, I know.

Why has this happened to me, Max?

Come here. Come here.

How did it go?

I told you! You said he'd wouldn't give it you, but I knew he would.

-You OK?

-Just drive.