14/04/2014 EastEnders

WASHING MACHINE HUMS

-Here, where's my sugars?

-There's four in there!

Who's put a wash on?

Lee'll take me for a jog later. Burn it all off.

Or we could do a bit of chairobics!

There's sheets in there. Someone's washing sheets.

Look at you, fretting like an old washerwoman.

-Ain't me.

-Not me neither.

-Yours could probably walk.

-It'll be young Johnny, dreaming...

Leave him alone, please!

You want to - what is it the kids say?

How am I meant to wash the bar towels if someone's washing sheets?

"Chillax".

THEY LAUGH

Well, it's a good thing we don't start this open day until two!

Maybe I need earrings.

No! I'll find you some.

-What?

-We've got one week, yeah? We'd better hope today works.

-There you go. They're nice.

-Thank you.

BARREL CLANKS

I'll, er, take the towels to the launderette.

See if Mrs Branning's got time this morning.

It's that cold upstairs just now,

you might as well have left the freezer door open.

Don't be surprised. Just me and the old man, ain't it?

All weekend? I ain't stupid, Mick.

It's Lee.

What about him?

Him staying at my dad's.

It wasn't cos he needed time to himself.

What do you mean?

He was going to go AWOL.

AWOL? Why?

He saw his mate get blown up in front of him.

Why didn't... why didn't he say something?

He doesn't want you to worry.

Just like I don't want you to worry.

I've talked to him. And he's going to stick it out.

But if he goes back, he...

Maybe he should leave.

Let me go and talk to him.

No, no. He doesn't want anyone to know.

I'm not just anyone - I'm his mum.

I know.

Just trust me. Don't take it personally.

Just sometimes, you know,

I think it's hard to be truthful to the ones you love, you know.

Right, listen up, everyone - I need you all at the restaurant for 11 o'clock this morning.

-Nah, I've got an open day.

-I've got a photographer booked. OK. A nice big family portrait.

We're going to hang it up in the restaurant ready for the reopening on Easter Monday.

-That's so embarrassing.

-Come on, it's a great idea. All of us, on the wall.

What if my mates come in and see it?

-It's hardly McKlunky's, is it? Me, you, Jane...

-Jane?

Yeah. She's my business partner.

-It's going to look like you've got two wives!

-Cindy!

Dad, you really can't expect me to just drop everything...

Lucy, for once in your life just get your priorities straight, will you?

-I'll go and get those blank contracts printed out, yeah?

-Yeah.

You're not going to attract many students with that.

Well, then, I'd better redo it.

Sorry I can't make your precious photo shoot but - you know, priorities.

Me and Lee -

we've always been close.

Of course, you'd have noticed if you'd been around more.

If you'd let me be around, I might have had a chance.

I didn't make him come to me.

Now, you listen to me.

This is my family!

Don't you dare try and turn 'em against me.

And that's what I'm doing, is it?

I've seen what you do.

Little joke in their ear, little cockle in their pocket.

I'm their grandad.

This is what you do, isn't it? Get between family.

Divide and rule. Just like me and Shirley.

Shirley don't see her kids, it ain't cos of nothing I done.

Just like it wasn't me that made Lee turn to me first.

You ain't going to do this!

When you was young, when you was growing up - I wasn't there for you.

None of you.

So maybe, I'm just trying to put that right.

It don't work like that.

I just...for them... For the grandkids.

I want to do better - to be better -

than I was with you.

Why can't he just be proud of me?

Come on, Lucy - you're taking it all to heart, aren't you?

Why does he think that he's so much more important?

Everything I do. Every time that...

-It ain't easy being a dad.

-Don't you dare...

Seriously, it ain't. You know. Your kids want you, you ain't there.

-When you are there, they don't want you.

-Even when I ran his businesses...

-Please can we talk about something less serious?

-Nah, see, I thought you'd understand!

And I do understand. Just... David'll be back soon and...

-This is all this is to you, isn't it!

-Lucy, don't go. Course it ain't.

-Stop it!

-Lucy, don't go.

There you are. You all right?

How's Lola?

Yeah, she's getting there. Up and about.

Good, good... This, er... this family photo.

Come and have a seat.

Yep.

-It was what Cindy said earlier on. Got me thinking.

-What?

Jane and Denise both being in the photo,

it's going to look like I've got two wives.

Dad, that was just Cindy being Cindy.

But what if she's right? It's a business.

And from a business point of view,

I mean, two women. It's going to look weird.

Dad, it's 2014! That's just what a family looks like!

Yeah, but it's two wives - it's not like I'm from Utah or nothing, is it?!

Jane's my business partner so I can't really...

so I was wondering - do you think I should ask Denise to step out?

-Oh, really, now?

-Denise...

-You don't want me in it, do you?

-No, that's not what I was saying...

-You'd rather have Jane in it than Denise...

-Maybe you're the one who shouldn't be there.

-I mean, you're not related to anyone - not to me, anyway.

-Dad!

Do you think I even want to be in your stupid photo?

Just be you and Jane soon.

Jane's my business partner, isn't she?

-And she's... she's Bobby's adopted mum.

-And what am I, then?

You're my fiancee. Come on, love, think about it - two wives?

You ain't got one wife, Ian.

And the way you're heading, you ain't going to!

Is it really bad?

You've got a cut on your head, yeah.

I'll do something with my hair.

Cover it.

Wait till it stops bleeding.

Do you want to go to hospital? Get it checked out.

I've got my open day.

Sorry, I shouldn't have grabbed you like that, just - you and me,

when we're together, I can't think straight.

How many times have you used that line?

Quite a few.

Usually works.

You OK?

Yeah. I'll live.

Look, just cut Ian a bit of slack, will you?

Dads don't always get it right.

Oh, and it's another jammy shot there from King Jam of Jammyland.

-Bet you win Nancy's pool tournament this weekend.

-Mum!

You even going to pretend you love us all the same?

I'm just saying - he probably will, won't he?

-You give him any favours.

-I don't need no favours!

-I made you a bacon sarnie, baby.

-Cheers, Mum.

Oh, you've not made us one, then?

-You know where the pan is.

-How come he gets one and we...?

Cos I don't get to spoil him often, do I?

And when he's out there in, in... when he's out there,

he probably misses a nice bacon sarnie.

-That going spare?

-No.

She'll be polishing your boots next.

I'll make you another one. A better one.

Have you seen her?

-Don't stare!

-I'm not staring. Tiff used to have a teacher that was...little like that.

-Well, why are you asking me if I've seen her?

-She does this all the time.

Goes to every stall.

-Looks at everything and buys nothing.

-So? Half the people round here do the same.

Do you think she's from the council?

-Peter, you heard anything about the markets merging?

-They said they'd know by Easter.

Reckon she's checking us out? Before she makes her mind up?

-I'll do the talking.

-Be nice.

All right? Buy two and I'll give you a fiver off.

-Think I'll keep looking.

-Best quality you can get, this is. Best on the market.

Yeah, you want tat, you can get that on Spring Lane.

-That right, yeah?

-Yeah. Tat in every size and colour.

-Kat...

-Most colours. All sizes, probably.

Don't think I'm the one wearing tat, darling.

-Was that you "doing the talking"?

-She knows something.

-Bit lairy, wasn't she?

-Yeah.

-Hey, you don't have to do that.

-Well, I am.

-Why didn't you say earlier?

-I was winding your brother up.

-Yeah, course you was(!)

-That's my job!

And Lady Di threw up on them.

She ain't going to be council. She showed you her ID?

-You didn't hear her, Nan.

-Maybe she's undercover council.

Alfie, it's not a joke!

So come on then, have they made their mind up yet?

You can't keep us waiting for ever.

-Actually, a decision has been made.

-And?

You're not doing this.

I've sat down on the road for this market. My dad's market.

-Come on, Ian...

-They're not closing this market down.

I've booked the community centre for a meeting. Six o'clock. Be there.

Not closing the market? Who're you kidding, eh?

He said it was Lady Di.

But she's in with you.

Someone's going to have to talk to him.

You having a bubble, ain't you?

If your dad's having...bother. In the night.

He ain't having bother... He's...

-He IS bother.

-This ain't funny, Mick.

I could see if Sonia could get a plastic sheet or something?

She deals with this sort of stuff all the time.

But I ain't very good at...

Well, one of you's going to have to say something!

-Fatboy says he can start Friday.

-Oh, good.

Thought you'd be gone by now.

Priorities.

Really?

So where is everyone?

What have you done now?

Lee...

when you stayed at your grandad's...

in the night... Did he wet the bed?

No! Why?

Are those sheets his?

And you ain't going to say nothing to him?

No, I thought you could. Seeing as you're so close.

Why did you go to him? And not me?

I didn't want to let you down.

You could never let me down.

Mum's been acting weird.

You said you was going to keep it between us.

You can talk to her. She's your mum.

And he's your dad.

PHONE VIBRATES

Lola!

I was just...buying some things. Me and Pops.

-Let me get those for you.

-No, it's all right. Thanks.

Keep the change.

Here, let me...

I'm quite capable. Been managing on my own long enough.

Tina said, um...

-Is everything OK?

-If you like sleeping in dog sick.

No, I mean...

You know, like, in the night? The waterworks?

Cos you're not well.

And sometimes when people are not well... Let me just...

I am perfectly fine. Thank you.

-Do you want anything from the flat?

-Nothing I can't get myself.

-Like underwear?

-I said nothing!

Fine! Sleep in your dirty ones then for all I care.

You don't want me either.

You are my sister.

OK? We fight. That's what families do.

-I'm not family.

-You're mine.

Look, you and this baby. I couldn't do what you're doing.

I always said to myself - if I can't be a better mum than ours was...

if I'm just going to make a mess like she did...

-And that's what you think I'm going to do?

-No.

I never even knew her.

I didn't really either. But I know you can do this.

How do you know?

Because you're a better person. And because one of us...

If you...have a kid, when you're ready,

you'll be a better mum than she was too.

Look, Cindy - the other week...

I'm sorry. Sometimes I just...

He feels really bad.

I thought you didn't want anything to do with it?

Too busy being a hotshot?

Yes. But he's still my dad. None of us get everything right.

Go on. Go get changed. We're going to be late.

He's not as tough as you think, you know.

-Just like me.

-Lee.

-Just like you.

But I'm going back to the army.

Because you taught me, no matter how tough -

you do what's right.

Um... maybe we...

-Maybe we should do this tomorrow.

-Mr Beale, you booked me.

I know, Maggie, I know, but...

Thanks for trying, love.

-I was going to do that!

-Well, I'm doing it. Or do I need your permission now?

-Course you don't need my permission.

-Am I not doing it right?

-Is this not how you like it?

-Don't be like this.

-Every man I get with. Every man!

-It's not every man, Roxy.

What is the matter? Are you jealous or what?

-That's it, Roxy. Yes, I'm jealous(!)

-You going to "take care" of him as well, are you?

I'm sorry. OK. I'm sorry. I know this is really hard for you.

Really? You're sorry? So why've you been avoiding me?

But you can't take it out on me and Aleks.

-I'm just trying to make sure you...

-We're buying a house together! We complete today.

-And?

And if this is what it's going to be like, then I don't want it.

Show me. Show me.

-My face!

-Bobby, come here. Come here - stand in front of Cindy.

-Try and hide her bump for me, will you? Sit yourself down.

-You'd better be paying me for this.

There. Smile.

Let's have a look.

-Get your eyes tested.

-All right.

-Right, if you could all please...

-Yeah, OK. Come on, Jane.

-Come on. We agreed.

-No, I don't think Denise would like it.

-You're not the only one.

-I tried.

-It's a family photo.

-And you're Bobby's mum.

Please, Mum?

Yeah! Come on, in the middle, business partner! That's it.

And big smile, everyone...

Can I get a cup of tea to go, please?

-Don't worry about the tea.

-No, you don't.

-I don't know anything.

-Oh, come on, Tam.

-No. Ever since my little sit-in, I've not exactly been in the loop, have I?

-OK.

This guy just came in, works in the dentists on Spring Lane.

And he said he heard on the grapevine

-they were all told this morning.

-And?

-Right. That's it. Where's Aleks?

I... I went to...

You went to my gaff?

Yeah - I didn't like the thought of...

Of what?

You stole my keys and you went to my gaff.

-I want you to be comfortable.

-You do not go to my gaff.

You do not touch my things.

I'm sorry. I just thought...

I'm sorry.

-Your dad very kindly went and got me some clean pyjamas.

-Did he?

-Get my coat, Lee.

-Dad...

-I need to go home.

-If you're having trouble...

-Happy now, are you? Humiliated me enough?

-Grandad, leave him.

He's only trying to help. We're all just trying to help.

-Take me home.

-Let him get a cab.

No - I'll drive him. I want to.

-Go on, go through.

-Cheers.

Hi.

How are you?

She's good. She's glad to be home.

And Lexi?

Yeah. She's OK.

We're going to go to the park later.

I was wondering if you wanted to come for some dinner tonight maybe?

No, it's all right. Pops is going to treat me to some wings, ain't ya?

No, all of you.

Us. We can order - we can all do anything you want.

That sounds good, don't it? Eh?

We'll be there.

So how comes they all know and we don't?

Tonight. Six o'clock. Community Centre.

No, now, Aleks.

It's not fair, is it?

I'm not going to tell you without the other traders as well.

That's why we put the word around.

Guys, this hasn't been much fun for any of us, yeah?

Oh, my heart's bleeding.

The council have decided that... Spring Lane is the bigger site.

And?

And I have convinced them to move the market to Bridge Street.

JOYFUL EXCLAMTIONS

Let me... let me help you in, yeah.

I can manage on my own. Plenty of practice.

Not so short-sighted now, am I?

Look, I will call the opticians, all right? Thank you.

And thank you for sorting everything out.

And for putting my business before yours.

I knew you'd see sense in the end.

It's not like you're making any money at the moment. But you will.

You've just got a lot to learn. A lot.

You ready?

Well, I'm sure you'll teach me.

Knows all about business, does he?

That's just your dad, ain't it?

Well, there's one rule that he's forgotten - watch your back.

They've already got a flower stall.

It's a good job I like a challenge.

People stick with what they know. They'll still come to Pam's Flowers.

I always come up roses. What about you, though?

New road, compulsory purchase thing,

you haven't got your undertakers any more, Les...

-I'm starting again.

-You didn't? How could you afford Turpin Road?

Cost us an arm and a leg but... bit of compensation on the way.

We're moving! Moving to Turpin Road.

All right, Aleks. Listen, our little arrangement still stands, yeah?

Sure. I want double.

MUSIC: "Our House" by Madness

-Dance on our graves, why don't you?

-Told you she weren't a councillor.

Sorry, I'm Bianca. Who are you?

-Donna. Never been to Spring Lane?

-It's lovely.

You was sizing us up this morning, weren't you?

I had to check out the best slots.

-That's all right. I'm sure you'll find somewhere.

-That's the spirit!

Round the corner, under the bridge.

Kat! Sorry, Donna, what is it you sell?

Womenswear.

-But we sell...

-Not for much longer.

KNOCK AT DOOR

Leave it, Mick.

FRANTIC KNOCKING

KNOCKING CONTINUES

I'm not interested.

I'm tired and it's late.

KNOCKING

Dean!

You have to hide me, Grandad.