20/03/2017 EastEnders

Sorry, your eggs are a little bit overdone.

Thanks.

-What, aren't you eating?

-Not hungry.

Look, I thought you weren't going to worry about today.

Babe, Yolande put in a good word for you.

I mean, she even said that she might make the meeting.

She's obviously busy or she'd have said she'd be there, wouldn't she?

I just don't get why they'd want to haul me

all the way up to Birmingham HQ.

Even if I don't get fired, I won't get paid yet.

I've had nothing in weeks.

Look...

-It's nothing much, but...

-No. Hey, no, I don't...

I won it on the horses. Just take it now, man. Take it.

Oh, I nearly forgot.

I got Dot to wash and iron this.

You keep your head today and you'll be back at work tomorrow.

Why aren't you dressed for school?

Don't even think about it. Not after last week.

But I've got a spelling test. I ain't revised or nothing.

T-O-U-G-H.

Can I have a pound, please?

-What for?

-Cake stall at school.

-Here you go.

-Thanks.

I know something you don't.

About Preston.

What about him?

He rang last night.

He's going to be staying in Manchester a while longer.

All right for some.

-How come you're not ready for school?

-I ain't going, am I?

-What?

-No. He threw up. I don't want him spreading it around.

I have no clue how you get away with it.

So do you fancy doing something later? Bit of window shopping?

I can't. It's Steven's day off, too.

We've got a...movie day.

Oh. You don't seem so keen.

-It's his idea of quality time.

-And not yours?

I already tried to spice things up. That was a disaster.

-Why?

-Jane and Stacey almost walked in on us.

-Oh, no.

-I know.

Anyway, we should do something soon.

A night out or something. It's my birthday next week.

Yeah.

Isn't Steven taking you out?

Doubt it. He's not mentioned anything. He's probably forgot.

Come on, a little bit of flirting with a hunky stranger

might do you some good.

Lauren, that is the last thing on my mind.

There's plenty of talent out there. Trust me, I know.

What do you mean you know?

Some random bloke gave me his number last week.

-What?

-At my dad's work. He left it with the receptionist.

I helped him fix a photocopier.

Oh, yeah, as you do. Well, I hope you binned it.

Yeah...eventually.

-What does that mean?

-After I put the number in my phone.

-And what? Text him?

-No.

-But...

-Right. Well, Lauren... Come on, don't be stupid.

Where's Kathy?

She's at the dentist. She'll be back soon.

-Remind her about the community meeting at the Vic later.

-OK.

Donna's invited half the market for her birthday so it should be

a decent turn out.

Oh, I've got something for you.

A celestite crystal.

Promotes calming energy and attracts good fortune.

It's going to take more than a glorified bit of rock.

On second thoughts, give it here.

-I could do with all the help I can get.

-Tea, please.

I could do without her two-penneth an' all. I tell you.

Oh... I just wanted to say good luck. Yeah?

-Thanks.

-Make sure you don't say anything stupid

cos it was your big mouth that got you into trouble with Beckett the last time.

-After you interfered, you mean?

-You wouldn't be in this position if you knew how to keep it zipped.

All right, Kim. I don't think she needs any more stress.

Fine.

Just ring when you're done, all right?

Suck up whatever they throw at you and just admit you made a mistake.

-That crystal will give positive energy. You'll be fine.

-Yeah.

Oh. See you.

So did Preston really phone?

You must be missing him.

I've seen this new game I want. Commando Attack: Code Red.

Don't push it.

It'd keep me quiet, having a new game to play.

How long are you planning to keep this up for?

As long as I want.

-Do you know blackmail's a crime?

-So is what you did with Preston.

No.

-No, it isn't.

-Tell everyone then. I dare you.

-The game?

-Just get out of my sight!

You can't talk to me like that.

Not if you want me to keep my mouth shut.

DOOR SLAMS

All good?

Few lousy leg exercises, anyone'd think I'd run a marathon.

Listen, we're going to watch a movie later.

Why don't you join us?

Wouldn't you rather it was just you and Lauren?

Well, we'll have plenty of time together for her birthday next week.

Speaking of which, look what I got her.

All her favourite treats from New Zealand.

Got 'em online.

That's a lovely idea!

Don't let Ian near them though, will you?

-Thought you were going to be back later.

-Huh?

What is that?

SHE GASPS

Chit Chats!

What did you...? Steven!

You weren't meant to see 'em till next week.

Oh...

-Sorry.

-It's all right. Hey, buddy.

Tina, you can't serve this. It's burnt.

Sorry...

-Sorry, sorry...

-Leave it, leave it.

Why don't you take a break? Come on. You've been rushed off your feet.

I just wish Shirley was around to help me.

Leave it, come on. Look, you are doing the right thing.

Sylvie will be much better off in a home.

Have they said how long it might be?

I'm waiting for social services to get back to me.

They have to assess her first.

-You know what, I think I

-will

-take that break, Kath. I'll go and check on her.

Oh! Here he is, the birthday boy to be.

Cup of tea to go, please.

Right, listen, I want you to come in tomorrow for a nice free meal.

Line that stomach.

-No-one's really up for drinking on a week night, Mum.

-What?

You're kidding me. What about Jay?

He said something about working late tomorrow.

-And Johnny?

-Busy revising.

No. Hang on, I'm not having that.

I shall be having words with those two.

Mum, honestly, leave it.

Ben, you are turning 21.

This is a major milestone in your life.

No, it's just another number. I don't want a fuss.

I wasn't going to tell you just yet but I'm taking you to the South Bank

on Saturday.

I thought we'd do the London Eye and then grab a bite to eat.

Which part of "no fuss" don't you understand?

-Thank you.

-Thanks.

-Cheers.

Cor, is it me or is there like a lingering smell of dog pony?

Stop it, you're being paranoid now.

I tell you something now. I will never eat Irish stew again.

I'm telling you.

Moose. Er...

We weren't expecting you.

Lee didn't tell you I was coming?

No.

I got a few days' leave.

He asked me to grab some of his stuff on the way to Dover.

He just expects me to drop everything that I'm doing, does he?

It's all right, it's all right. We ain't busy, so...

Yeah, but he could've told me.

Sorry, Mick.

Ain't your fault.

COMPUTER GAME BLARES

I made you lunch.

Sorry I snapped. I shouldn't have.

-Does it mean I can have the game?

-I'm not made of money.

Look...

I appreciate you keeping my secret. I do.

-But we have to find some other way to work this out.

-Why?

Cos Louise is already getting suspicious.

What if the school starts asking questions, too?

That won't be good for either of us.

I could still bend a few rules.

The odd late bedtime,

friends round more often. Things not so obvious.

I was even going to suggest sending your mum some Mother's Day flowers

-from you.

-That'd be cool.

All I ask is, cut me a bit of slack.

Please?

Thank you.

Is it safe, or do I need my body armour?

Typical Lee, eh? Memory like a sieve.

Couldn't be bothered, more like.

Yeah, well, I'll have strong words with him when I get to Dover.

-Look, I won't hang about.

-No...

Put the kettle on while you're here, eh?

I'll get the rest of his stuff.

I have to say, it's great to see you doing so well for yourself.

I give these upstarts a run for their money.

I'm sure you do.

Shall we start?

Ms Fox. You were called here today...

Let's dispense with the formalities. Denise knows why she's here.

We thought we would give you a chance to explain yourself,

given your comments to the Walford Gazette.

Ah...

OK, well, what I said, it...

It was just the local rag.

It's not even that bad.

Quote, "People are getting poorer and what do head office do?

"They hike up their prices..."

Yeah, well, it probably doesn't sound too good...

"..lining their pockets whilst ordinary hardworking people

"are queuing for food banks..."

Not to mention a common assault charge.

-Hardly the kind of image we want our brand...

-Let her speak.

OK. What I said...

..it was a mistake.

A massive error of judgment.

And it won't happen again.

I can only apologise.

Profusely...

-..unreservedly.

-Apology accepted.

-Right.

So...do I get to keep my job?

Yes.

You'll be given a formal warning.

Oh.

Well, thank you.

Is that it then?

Not quite.

We think it would benefit the company if you went on

a training course before returning to work.

Sorry? I don't quite follow.

Help you to brush up your people skills.

Back to basics in terms of training.

Give you a better understanding of behaviour types.

Passive, assertive...

aggressive.

That way we can avoid any future slip-ups.

So remind me again why we're watching some ancient romcom.

Cos you were outvoted. So button it.

Give it a chance. You haven't even seen it.

No, but I'll tell you exactly what's going to happen.

She is going to bed the bad boy and then realise it was all...

-BABY CRIES

-..a big mistake.

Oh... I'll go.

Why women in films do that anyway is beyond me.

Not just films. Admittedly he was no Daniel Cleaver.

You talking about Grant?

Can I ask you a question?

Do you regret it?

Yeah. I regret it.

So why do it?

He made me feel alive at the time, I guess.

Thrill of the chase, maybe.

We're missing this.

-ANGRY:

-I don't need to go on some...

-CALMER:

-..some anger management course. Because let's face it,

that's what this actually is.

It's a people skills course, Denise.

I've said I'm sorry. I mean, isn't that enough?

Your comments ruffled a lot of feathers, Denise.

You know, I thought you'd have my back.

It would have been a lot worse if I hadn't have stepped in.

You'll get a shiny new certificate for your wall.

Like I say, I've got other commitments.

There's my GCSE course for a start, and...

Is there something funny about that?

What is it with you? You and your pompous demeanour?

You must be overcompensating for something.

-I beg your pardon?

-I don't think she meant that.

Oh, yes, I did. Every word.

Well, why drag me out here?

Stringing things out for so long when I'm barely even getting by?

-Denise, it's not about...

-No! No job is worth this.

-Minute Mart ain't the centre of the universe, you know.

-Last warning.

Well, you can stick it where the sun don't shine.

Cos I quit!

Denise, don't be stupid!

You see, you? You should learn when to keep your mouth shut.

Maybe it is you who needs to go on this course.

That was Lee's great-grandad's.

Apparently it was passed down from the war.

So how is he doing?

He's enjoying his work from what I hear.

Getting on with things, yeah.

I ain't really seen that much of him, to be honest.

All I know is that he's down there with...Beanbag?

So they must be going out quite a lot.

I wouldn't let it bother you.

Is he seeing someone else?

That's a yes then.

-Whit, why even go there?

-Bet he didn't waste much time, did he?

Look, don't do it to yourself. You're better than that, Whit.

No, I'm OK. I'm actually OK.

I think I just needed to hear it.

Cos in a weird kind of way, it helps.

I know he's my best mate but I don't know what he was doing,

ever letting you go.

You sure you're OK?

Yeah. I'm fine. Honestly.

If you need anything...

..I've always got time for you.

Thanks.

Take care, Moose.

Says they're guaranteed to get there by Mother's Day.

Cheers.

-Look who made a miraculous recovery.

-Oh, don't wind him up.

What's for tea?

I'll grab some pizza on the way back from the Vic.

Martin texted.

There's some community meeting on.

-Don't mind if I go, do you?

-Take your time.

Can we have fried chicken instead?

-Oh, I fancy pizza.

-I'll grab both.

-Why do you always give in to him?

Won't be long.

SNORING

Steven, can you call my phone, please?

-Can you call my phone? Steven, please.

-All right, all right!

Get up a minute.

It's just going straight to voicemail.

-Think you had it upstairs earlier on.

-Yes, well, I've had it since then, haven't I?

All right, just calm down.

You don't get it, do you? My whole life is on that phone.

-What's up?

-She thinks she's lost her phone.

Oh, no.

I must've dropped it somewhere.

Exercises must've wiped me out. Have I missed the film?

Ben.

This came. I was going to drop it round later.

So what are you up to for your birthday?

I don't know, but I wish people would get off my case.

Sorry.

-Has anyone seen a phone, by any chance?

-No, sorry.

-No, I haven't.

-Donna?

-No. Sorry.

Make the most of it, Ben.

Someday you'll wish you were 21 again.

I didn't think you'd bother with the meeting if I'm honest with you.

-I needed to get out the house for a bit.

-Everything OK?

Yeah, yeah. Nothing a few drinks won't fix.

Oh, yeah, no worries, mate.

Listen, any idea when Preston's back?

-I could just really do with the help.

-No, I haven't heard.

SHE LAUGHS

-There you go. Can I get you anything else?

-Did I leave my phone here earlier?

Sorry. I ain't seen it.

Are you sure you had it with you?

Yes, positive. Can we check upstairs?

Um, I've got to wait for Mick to come back from the barrel... Wait!

Oh, yeah, just go on up.

It's bad luck to read cards before the big day.

Still, what's so big about staying in, eh?

It's from Pam and Les.

I can't believe they remembered.

They sent me 50 quid.

Bull's-eye? Nice one.

Thanks, Kath. Cheers.

It was going to be Paul's 21st in February as well.

Sorry, mate. I didn't know.

We talked about going...

..going to New York.

And there's me banging on about us getting legless, eh.

Look, if you prefer a quiet one, I won't mention it again.

Then I remembered something else Pam said to me once.

That I shouldn't always feel like Paul's looking over my shoulder.

She was right.

I can't keep living in the past.

So what are you saying then?

Well...

..be rude not to spend it.

Good man, get your laughing gear round that. Half the price,

double the buzz. Happy birthday, Donna.

-Oh, cheers Mick. Ready?

-Yep.

Three, two, one... Someone's thirsty.

Denise should be back by now. Have you heard anything?

Either her phone has died or she's on the tube.

Well, maybe I should get things started.

Are you joining us, Kush?

After the meeting, yeah. Actually you might be right.

-These lot are going to be wasted otherwise.

-Yeah.

Listen up, everyone. Denise isn't back yet so I'll kick things off.

-Let's start with the bins.

-Oh...

-I know, I know.

I phoned the council and they've blamed the recent mix-up

on a glitch on the part of Servwaste.

They promised the bins will be emptied Friday.

Mick, are you sure this stuff's stronger?

It don't have the same kick.

Uh... No, it's double smooth, that gear.

-It's a bottle of Russian.

-Is anyone even listening?

Yeah, we are. What next?

-Kim!

-Huh?

This is a waste of time. I'm off.

-Patrick... Patrick, wait.

-What's the point?

You're not going to get any sense out of them today, are you?

Come on, Kush. This one's got your name on it.

-Nah, Denise went to a lot of effort sorting this meeting, so...

-Well, she ain't here.

-We could rearrange it. Couldn't we, Mum, really?

-Yes!

Yeah. Come on then...

-Was your phone insured?

-Yeah.

OK. It's not the end of the world then, is it?

Listen, I've got to get back downstairs because Mick needs me.

-He's on his own, bless him.

-What's that?

-Oh. Moose.

Came round for the rest of Lee's stuff earlier.

Oh. And he just happened to leave his number on your arm?

No, not like that.

Well. You're one to talk, ain't you? Giving ME advice this morning.

Well, it's hardly the same. And anyway, I'm single.

Well, actually, Whitney, technically you're still married.

What are you arguing with me?

Why are you in such a bad mood?

Oh, you've lost your phone. Yeah. Big deal.

Yeah, well, it ain't just that, is it?

It's not just the phone.

No.

You're annoyed cos you lost that guy's number. Hm?

-All right, yeah!

-Yeah.

Yeah, I am. Cos I was going to text him this afternoon.

Why?! What are you playing at, Lauren?

You told me to fight for my marriage, remember?

At least I tried.

Come on, you've got to do the same with Steven. Right?

For all you know this guy, whoever he is, might be a proper weirdo. OK?

Why're you chasing a guy you don't know nothing about?

Yeah. Well, it's too late now anyway, ain't it?

Yeah. It is.

So, whose round's next?

-I think you've got one, Michelle.

-Right.

Oh, no, I've left my card at home.

-Oh, yeah!

-I have!

It's all right, I'll get you another one seeing as it's your birthday.

Cheers, Kush. Same again, just nipping to the loo.

All right.

Are you sure you're all right?

Yeah. Why keep asking?

The rate you're putting them away, I'll be carrying you home.

You must be climbing the walls in that house.

Obviously you're used to teaching and that.

I've been invited to an interview.

-For a teaching job?

-Teaching assistant.

-There's not much else about.

-Wrong time of year, ain't it?

-TEXT MESSAGE ALERT

-There'll be more teaching jobs in September.

-Yeah.

Oh...

I'd better head back.

Yeah? I'll come with you. Stacey's probably got the dinner on.

See you.

Oh! About time.

I've been calling you all afternoon.

Yeah, well, my phone died.

Well?

-Don't keep us in suspense. Come on.

-What happened to the meeting?

It was a non-starter. Donna's party hijacked it.

Listen, just tell us how it went.

I quit!

-She's winding us up.

-Yeah, and a fat lot of good this thing did.

I mean, how are we supposed to get anywhere if this is your attitude?

Forget about the meeting. Your job?

Yeah, well, there are other jobs in the world, you know.

I'll tell you what, we're going to meet again Friday.

I'll see if the community centre's free.

That way it can't turn into a drinking session.

I was out of order earlier.

Sorry.

It's your birthday, Ben. Spend it how you like.

It's just hard sometimes, Mum.

Not having Paul around.

You've got your whole life ahead of you, love.

He'd want you to enjoy it.

And...

..about the weekend. I'd love to go to the South Bank.

On one condition though. We do it on Mother's Day instead.

Make it a double celebration.

Thank you.

But why on earth would you...

Because that Beckett fella. He gets up my nose, don't he?

-But Yolande?

-She did all she could. Oh, here we go.

So you said that you quit.

Does that mean they said you could come back?

They wanted to make a mockery out of me.

They wanted to put me on some course.

So all you had to do was keep your mouth shut?

Exactly what I said.

You need that job, Denise.

Do you think because I am poor,

obscure, plain and little,

that I am soulless and heartless?

You think wrong.

-Did she just quote Shakespeare?

-It's Jane Eyre.

Well, Jane Eyre ain't going to help you pay no bills.

What will you do for money?

-I have no idea.

-No idea.

No idea.

I'll tell you what.

This is what I think to spending the rest of my life in that place.

Good riddance.