Mens Sana In Corpore Sano Holby City

I really like being your friend.

Not...

No.

I'm always going to have this shadow hanging over me.

We all have a shadow hanging over us.

Just some more than others.

Mr Malick gave her too much. She went into respiratory depression.

What Dr Copeland said... it couldn't happen.

You want me to get off? I will.

Dr Valentine, I can't do this unsupervised. I'm not qualified.

Don't do it.

Had you been made aware that the procedure was necessary?

No.

You're looking better.

-Excuse me?

-I said you're looking better.

Oh, I had a shave and a haircut.

Sometimes it's the little things that count.

Turning up to sessions, for example.

What can I say? I'm turning over a whole new leaf.

I've started running.

Anywhere particular?

No. Just running.

For fun?

For exercise.

You know what they say - healthy body, healthy mind.

I just figured it was time to pull myself together.

By running?

Everything.

"It's the little things".

Like...grieving?

Look, I've done enough grieving. And I don't pretend to have answers.

I don't need them. Not any more.

Really? Why is that?

Like you said - I'm better now.

'Argh! Argh!'

'Someone call an ambulance! He's dying!

'Help!'

Have you completed your investigation?

Let's just say I have covered our collective behinds.

It says here Dr Wilde is taking responsibility for the incident.

I thought that was in dispute?

It appears Dr Wilde has had a change of heart.

Or conscience.

Whatever her motives, it saves us

having to examine Dr Valentine's statement too closely.

You think he's lying?

There are rumours that Dr Wilde has, um...

Oh, how to put it delicately...?

"Taken one for the team".

Lipstick - on your collar.

C'mon, that's cliched, even for you!

It's not what you think.

Yeah, right.

What do you mean, cliched, anyway?

-I'm the least cliched person, I know.

-Yikes!

Remind me never to come to a dinner party with you and your mates.

There's something different about you.

You seem...relaxed.

-If I didn't know you better, I'd say you'd got...

-Don't even...

-Good news.

As though a weight's been lifted from your shoulders.

Maybe that chip?

I've come to a decision, that's all.

-What decision?

-If you can't beat 'em, join 'em.

Who's "them"?

PAGER BLEEPS

Morning, sleepy-head.

We were paged?

Not what I think, huh? "Sleepy-head".

What's going on? ED referral?

Not quite.

I've heard of dress down Friday but that is taking the...

-Dr Valentine brought the patient in.

-Patient collapsed in the gym where I was working out.

Any particular reason you bypassed ED?

Yeah, his symptoms. Abdominal X-ray, CT scan, U&Es, please.

Hey, whoa. If you want to play doctor on AAU at least put on some scrubs.

If you guys want to mark your territory, find a tree.

Patient has severe cramping, abdominal pain. Oh, and diarrhoea - bloodied.

Must have been a nice ambulance ride.

Dr Wilde. A word, please? Now.

Patient's all yours.

"Patient" got a name?

What's going on there, then?

Nothing good.

Didn't you hear about the St Valentine's Night massacre?

I hear you changed your statement. About what happened.

I just wanted to explain.

You know what? I get it. You lost your wife.

Then you lost your mind.

Then you almost lost your job - refusing to attend a patient and then lying about it?

That's a career-ender.

Almost as bad as an F1 getting a name for herself for grassing up her seniors.

As has been made VERY clear to me.

Better to be known as an incompetent than as a whistle-blower.

I didn't do it for you.

I just didn't fancy committing career suicide on a point of principle.

As long as we're both on the same page.

Ulcerative colitis.

The man out there. It's a hunch but an informed one.

Look for a dilated colon on the X-ray.

-Why are you...

-A diagnosis like that will go a long way to proving to Ms Campbell you're not incompetent.

If you want to help me, you can tell the truth.

How's the flat?

Empty.

Her parents put it on the market.

-With your permission?

-Oh, it was my idea.

What about Tara's things?

I boxed them up.

All of them? That's a lot of memories.

It's just stuff. I was getting fixated.

Surrounded by her things. I realised it wasn't healthy.

Tell me - did this realisation come before or after

the incident on the night shift the other week?

-Does it matter?

-You tell me. Want to talk about it? It might help.

What makes you think I need help?

PAGER BEEPS

How are you feeling, Mr...?

Cohen. Josh.

Joshua Cohen? Jewish, right?

No flies on you.

-I'm feeling better now the drugs have kicked in.

-What happened?

Dunno.

I was working out as usual and all of a sudden I was in agony and passed out.

But not before I...you know.

Had an accident.

Bloods, U&Es, LFTs.

As Dr Valentine ordered.

So this "accident". Er...

Has it happened before?

It's not that uncommon in triathletes during heavy training blocks. But...

Not like this, not with blood.

-You're a triathlete?

-Professional. Why? Surprised?

Why would I be? Excuse me.

Of course, er, Dr...?

Tressler. Harry.

Dr Harry Tressler. Posh, right?

Have you got any labs on Mr Cohen yet?

You're a dark horse, aren't you? Performing an unsupervised chest drain is pretty dodgy,

-but doing it badly... Why didn't you tell me?

-I didn't want to talk about it.

And drop golden boy in it at the same time? No wonder Serena's all over you like a rash.

I didn't drop him in it. He told me to go ahead.

What, he stitched you up? Well, that's not fair.

-Of course it's not fair!

-What's not fair?

-Is there a problem?

-No, no problem.

I just asked Dr Tressler if I could perform a colonoscopy on a patient with bowel inflammation.

He said no.

Really? That does sound very unfair.

We don't need the colonoscopy. I've got the diagnosis.

-You do?

-Have you?

Crohn's.

I want an abdominal X-ray before I put money on it but...

Oh, well, let Dr Wilde do that for you.

You're needed in Mr Hanssen's office.

Ms Campbell? It could very well be Crohn's disease

but there are several other... a colonoscopy...

It says a lot about your working relationship with Dr Tressler that

you waited all of...what, three seconds, before going behind his back.

Book the X-ray. And wait for Dr Tressler before doing anything else.

Understood?

Any idea what this is all about?

So what were you and Gemma hob-nobbing about?

Why don't you ask her?

I have.

Gentlemen.

Good. AS you're aware, the presentations you've opted to

make were slated for next week.

I trust it's simply a matter of honing the finer

-points at this stage?

-Absolutely.

-Like a razor's edge, sir.

-Honing away...

-That's been...honed.

-Excellent.

So you won't mind if I bring the presentations forward?

Can't see a problem. When?

Today. At this evening's Mortality and Morbidity meeting.

I do realise this is rather sudden

so if either of you have any objection...

I don't. Dr Valentine?

No. If Dr Tressler's good to go, then so am I.

Excellent. Well, good luck. May the best man win.

Was there something else?

KNOCK ON DOOR

Oliver? We've had a referral from ED.

I should be finishing this presentation.

Yes, Mr Hanssen told us it'd been moved forward.

If you'd like another pair of eyes...

I've...got to make a few tweaks before I'm ready with it.

They'll have to wait.

You're going to want to see this. Trust me.

-What is it?

-A blast from the past.

Dr Valentine!

You don't remember me, do you?

Chasing down my deadbeat dad in the rain?

Jenny. Jenny Mulgrew.

-It must be a year! How are you?

-Well, apart from being here again, I'm OK.

Jenny's mum is on her way and ED suspect pleural effusion.

-Er, but there is another issue.

-I'm sure it'll be fine. We'll do a pericardiocentisis.

-Find out what's going on.

-Where's Dr Lo?

Tara? Is she here? I wanted her to know that...

-What's wrong?

-We'll just get you settled.

Nothing's wrong. Jenny. Tara's...

She passed away three months ago. It was very sudden. What...

What was it you wanted her to know?

This.

What a piece of junk! What happened to your wheels?

Alternator trouble. Thinking of trading it in, actually.

For that? What are you, like, 60?

With three kids and a wife? And what's up with the threads?

You haven't just returned from some exotic place in the developing

world with a severe case of straight, have you?

Look, I've just had a four-week enforced holiday.

Forgive me if I want to keep a low profile for a while, all right?

Low profile? I give it two hours.

It's good to have you back, Malick.

Oh, Malick? Hanssen's serious.

Don't mess up. Last chance.

You booked Mr Cohen's X-ray yet?

Booked it, scanned it. Bagged it.

I tried to sell Campbell on the colonoscopy again.

She pretty much accused me of stabbing you in the back.

You'd never stab me in the back.

The front provides much easier access to vital organs.

Yup.

Why are you still banging on about the colonoscopy, anyway? It's almost certainly Crohn's.

I'm damned if I'm going to spend my last day on this hellhole of a ward sticking wire up a man's jacksie.

I thought it might be ulcerative colitis.

Interesting. What gave you that idea?

Just a hunch.

Athlete. Non-smoker... things like that.

Big dilated colon.

Some hunch, Gemma.

Don't get too cocky. Still need confirmation yet.

I'll get the fine wire - you get the jacksie!

Hah!

You must know the risks, the pressure pregnancy can put on the heart.

The effects of anti-rejection meds on the baby.

-I know the risks.

-Does the father?

-There is no father.

-This pericardio what's-it...it won't hurt the baby, will it?

-No.

But the obstetrician will want to check you out, just in case.

-In fact, looks like they're ready for you now.

-You're not staying?

-Got a deadline. I'll check in later.

Hey, you got married?

-Yeah...

-Who to?

Dr Lo?

Just before her operation. It's OK. We knew the risks, too.

You want to put a what up my where?

It sounds more unpleasant than it actually is. We can give you some sedation.

-PHONE RINGS

-Are you going to get that?

It's...my dad. Aaron...

He's Jewish, too.

He's probably wondering why I'm not at training.

-Hard case, is he?

-No. Not the way you think.

He thinks what I do is a...a waste.

-Of time?

-Of me.

He thinks the last Jewish athlete of any note got fit

running away from Goliath.

Now, a nice law degree... Well, that would be respectable.

Worthy.

This colonoscopy'll fix things, right?

I'll be able to go back to training?

Why don't we discuss treatment once we're certain of the diagnosis, yeah?

Excuse me.

Hello, Dad.

I thought we could begin by going through the clinical logbook then my e-portofolio analysis.

This F1 deadline is today, you say?

Can it not be delayed, give me time to get my head around it?

-You've had four weeks.

-I had things on my mind.

Like what?

Ah, the inquest.

Dominic Copeland trying to frame you in a fit of jealous sexual rage.

Yeah. That.

It all worked out in the end, though, didn't it?

I could have done without all that extra attention.

-Hey!

-Who do you think you are, papping in a hospital, you vulture?

She's your 3pm MRI and possible laparotomy.

My name is Carmen Bishop.

Who the hell are you?

Crohn's or colitis, I don't think... What are you doing?

Just having a laugh.

Hmmm. Haven't you got a test to study for?

-In fact, what is this test?

-Oh, yeah, that was my presentation.

They've brought it forward to this afternoon.

That's what you meant earlier. You think this is your last day on AAU.

-Going to miss me, aren't you?

-Like a host misses a parasite.

They do - if they're symbiotic.

So what is this laugh, then? Shouldn't you be preparing?

No need. I reckon it's in the bag.

Bit cocky, aren't you?

Valentine's a good doctor and he's on home soil.

Valentine's a wreck. What he did to you was inexcusable.

Don't go starting anything on my behalf.

Haven't you got anything better to worry about? Like your F1 deadline?

I need a supervisor, and neither Sacha nor Ric are here.

So? It just gets devolved to the ward's on-call senior doctor.

-Who is...?

-Serena Campbell.

You've got a lot of sucking-up to do.

Don't say anything to Oliver. Please.

I mean it. Promise me.

I promise. Go.

And tell Ms Campbell about the colonoscopy.

Oops!

Oliver, I know you're busy, but...

would you mind coming with me to talk to Jenny Mulgrew?

About what?

The results of her pericardiocentisis.

Why did you become a doctor?

I'd have expected you'd know exactly why you do what it is you do.

-Seeing as it's so important to you.

-What makes you say that?

You came back to work the day you buried your wife.

In fact, you haven't taken a single day off.

-That's remarkable dedication.

-What else was I supposed to do?

Take some time off. Time for yourself.

-Live your life.

-The job is SAVING lives.

And that's important.

Right?

You tell me.

Your tests have confirmed it's not infective endocarditis,

but there are signs of early rejection.

Your anti-rejection medication doesn't appear to be working.

Sounds ominous.

It's not working because it's not there. What's going on?

Jenny, have you stopped taking your meds?

What were you thinking? Have you any idea how dangerous this is?

How long ago did you stop? Two weeks, three weeks?

Three months. Give or take.

I had to. The risk to the baby...

Right, Nurse Maconie, we're going to need an urgent CT scan, please.

-It's going to be all right, isn't it?

-Jenny? Are you OK?

Is it...is the baby OK?

As far as the obstetrician can tell, the baby's going to be fine.

It's Jenny we're worried about.

Well, this must be some kind of record, even for you, Malick.

Back on the ward for five minutes before you get aggressive with a patient.

-A blind female patient...really?

-How was I supposed to know she was blind?

Actually, it does say here on the ward notes I gave you, um...

Let's have a look. "Carmen Bishop, 37.

"Long-term Churg-Strauss syndrome patient.

"Loss of sight and complications arising from peripheral neuropathy.

"Referred by GP for MRI..."

Shall I stop now?

Before one of us dies, go and play with Chantelle.

Pff! Why would I want to go and play with Chantelle!

Cos she's your friend.

Wait a minute, have you two had a falling out?

I wasn't aware we'd had a falling in.

All right.

Mallick, an apology would be good.

Finding out what's wrong with her - that would be even better.

What's done is done. She doesn't need lectures.

-She needs help.

-We can drain the fluid from the membrane surrounding the heart.

But that will only treat the symptoms and not the cause.

The only sensible course of action is to get back on your medication immediately.

No more meds. Not while the baby's inside.

-Then we take the baby out by Caesarian. And you go back on meds.

-She's only 27 weeks.

She could die.

Without drugs, so might you.

I don't get it. You got pregnant. You're a heart transplant patient.

-Does that mean I'm not supposed to live a normal life?

-Exactly.

You were given a gift. With it comes responsibility.

And becoming a mother doesn't?

What's the point? Jenny, you know you're living on borrowed time.

Even if you somehow avoid complete rejection now,

you carry to term. You survive the birth, you might only live ten years.

-Oliver! That's enough.

-No. He's right.

You're right. I do only have limited time.

But this is my life. My choice.

I guess I'm just going to have to make the most of the time I've got.

People depend on us. They're sick, in pain, incapacitated, dying.

They come to us for help. What could be more important than that?

It was important to Tara too, wasn't it?

In fact, it would be fair to say

that doing this was more important than anything for her.

Even her own health.

I don't know, maybe. What do you expect me to say?

I don't expect you to say anything.

But I'm interested in how you feel about it.

OK, you ready?

This is so humiliating.

-I'll be gentle.

-Bet you say that to all the girls!

-Hah!

-Oh, I do like a happy workplace.

Sorry to interrupt. Mr Cohen, I've got your father here.

Dad? Great. Come on in.

You must be Aaron. I'd shake your hand but...

Join the party. Anyone else you guys want to invite?

Maybe a passing tramp?

That's no way to speak of Ms Campbell, Joshua.

Especially in front of your father.

-Joshua? What are they doing to you?

-Could this day possibly get worse?

Getting teased by an upper-class twit as he prepares to stick a camera up my bum...

Welcome to ten seconds ago.

What?

Oh.

That was...beautiful.

Thank you very much. I'll be here all week.

I'll be interested in seeing the results.

I'll also be interested in hearing how

and why this procedure was green-lit without me knowing about it.

I thought you were going to talk to her? You chicken out?

Can he ride a bicycle after that?

-Um, Carmen?

-Don't hurt me, I'm unarmed.

I'm not... I wouldn't...

Right. I guess I deserved that.

-I guess you did.

-Look, I'm sorry. It's just...

Well, it's kind of hard to explain.

Is it? Young Dr Digby seemed to do it fine.

Yeah? What did he tell you exactly?

That you've just returned after four weeks.

That you've needed the time off because you've been involved

in a high-profile medical scandal where you put both your professional

career and your personal life under the microscope in order to

restore some sense of meaning and hope to a grieving mother.

So...did Dr Digby get it about right?

Yeah...I guess he did.

I just took your picture. Hope you don't mind?

No, no, no. It's fine...I guess.

Go on. Ask the question.

What use does a blind woman have for a camera?

My work.

You're an artist?

I try.

I used to be a photographer - professional.

Back in another life.

Before the Churg-Strauss?

It took my eyesight - but it can't take my creativity.

Or my imagination.

These days I use other resources to experience the world.

To get an impression. I experience that, document it,

and photograph it.

The fun bit's finding out if they match.

Describe what you see.

A dashing, virile, black Adonis, an immensely talented man

at the top of his game.

Arrogant, impetuous and daring.

How perfect.

I'd love to meet this man.

You're speaking to him.

Doesn't sound like it.

But I could be wrong.

Can I use it?

What?

The image. For my website.

Do what you like with it.

But be quick, OK? we need to get that MRI.

Oliver? I understand you've cleared away Tara's things.

-What?

-Er, flat's on the market or something? I was wondering...

How do you know that? How could you possibly know about that? Sharon?

-No.

-Is that what passes for patient confidentiality round yours?

-You bat your eyelids, she coughs up my private thoughts?

-Oliver, stop it.

I got a letter from Mr Lo.

Sharon had nothing to do with it.

Mr Lo?

He found this at the bottom of one of the boxes.

It seems that Tara left something to be delivered to me. A memory stick?

I couldn't remember receiving it.

I wondered if you knew anything about it?

No.

I didn't see or speak to Tara since I was discharged.

-We moved.

-Yes, to Norwich. Look, it's all here.

Every case history has a name. Except Patient X.

But there is a name. In annotation.

Yours.

The shadow. I remember Tara talking about that.

She came to see you?

No, when we first met. In the car.

She said: "There's a shadow hanging over all of us.

"Appreciate the opportunities we've been given".

Don't you remember?

I'm sorry.

I didn't mean any of this, you know.

I didn't even notice for the first three months.

I thought it was my meds making me late but turns out I was wrong.

Mum got me straight in the car and drove me to the clinic.

Ordered me to have an abortion.

-She was right.

-Don't you think I know that?

But you married Tara, knowing that she could...

Knowing that YOU could be left alone. Abandoned.

You wanted something.

A legacy.

So do I.

I'm all she's got. And I'm going to...

MONITOR BEEPS

MONITOR BEEPS FASTER

Jenny?

OK, I'm going to need some help here, please!

Why are you going?

It's just getting interesting.

Sometimes I blame myself.

I wonder if I'd done things differently. Said something sooner.

Tried harder, force her into action.

Stupid, huh?

The result would have been the same. I know that. And then...

I think - what if I'd never met her at all?

You know? What then?

The whole sliding doors thing.

If I'd never met her, then she might never have fallen in love.

Never got married. Never had reason to risk what she risked.

Tara had asthma.

-Did you know that?

-No, I didn't.

Nor did I. I only found out about it the day she died.

It was in her pre-op background check.

Funny, huh? That I wouldn't know something like that.

You can have intimacy without... full disclosure.

Can you? Really?

There's only so much time we have with each other.

Time...

Met her. Went out with her. Married her. Buried her.

And I never knew she had asthma.

I never really knew her at all.

I'm intrigued. What made you come up with ulcerative colitis?

I...I don't know. He's an athlete, non-smoker...basically a hunch.

Well, it appears you're right.

Unfortunately for Mr Cohen, this looks extremely severe.

-Toxic megacolon?

-No, but if it goes untreated any longer it will be.

He must have been in discomfort for months.

-I'll go and tell him.

-No, she who makes the diagnosis, breaks the diagnosis.

I'm sure you could do with preparing for your presentation.

-You're aware of the surgical options?

-Mmm.

-Good.

As soon you've got consent, find a slot.

We don't want to risk any delay.

Oh, and come and find me later.

We need to go through your e-portfolio ahead of the ARCP deadline.

See if you're likely to make F2.

Bed three. A doctor will be over any minute.

Aw! They're beautiful.

Yeah, they are.

She used to be a style photographer. Now she makes Art.

Slices of life.

-Impressions.

-Aw! She got you perfectly!

MRI is here.

I told her a doctor would be over in a minute.

Damn.

Ah, Mr Malick - would now be a good time?

Want to earn an extra credit?

Always. What's the discipline?

Patient communication.

Let's get her into theatre, please. Page an urgent obstetrics consult.

-Already done it.

-And tell Mr Hanssen I won't be available for the CT2 presentations.

Hmm, she's stable but critical.

I'm afraid we've no option but to operate.

That will mean anti-rejection medication.

And the baby?

We...may have to deliver her early by Caesarian.

I'm truly sorry. We will try our best.

Good luck. With your presentation.

I tried. To stop her.

What else was I supposed to do?

Try harder.

This is some kind of sick joke, right?

A few hours ago you were all laughing it up and now you're

telling me I have to live the rest of my life going in a bag?

Will he be able to compete?

No. Not competitively.

There must be another option.

You don't understand.

I do. There's no other way.

I've got a race coming up. A grand prix.

I've been training for this. Please - I just need a few weeks.

Josh, listen to what the doctor is saying.

She's saying my career's over. My life is over.

Nothing is over. You have other options.

Join the family business?

Become a lawyer just like Daddy and his daddy before him?

Mr Cohen, your condition is not only serious,

it could be catastrophic.

Worst case scenario, your colon could rupture at any moment.

If that happens, not only will you be unable to compete,

you will be on intensive care.

You must give consent to surgery. There's no other way.

Except maybe there is.

There's only a short-term solution. You'd still need the surgery.

I only need three weeks.

What is this short-term solution?

Corticosteroids. One cycle might be enough to get you your three weeks.

They'll strengthen the colon and reduce the inflammation.

-What?

-He's a professional athlete. He can't use steroids.

It's cheating.

One time only? To make a race he's been training for months?

Years even? I wouldn't call it cheating.

I'd call it a chance.

Are you responsible for this?

-No.

-You realise if I took this to Hanssen or Campbell

-it wouldn't just be Harry that carried the can for this.

-Yes, I realise that.

-But you won't.

-Why?

Because even though this

is childish and spiteful, it's actually true.

And none of us want it to go any further.

Tell Dr Tressler, if he wanted a fight, he's got one.

Digby, I've never seen anything like this in my life.

You're either going to be the best clinical surgeon

-the world's ever seen, or a serial killer. I can't decide.

-Thanks.

-I think.

-How did Ms Bishop take the news?

-She didn't.

-You didn't tell her?

-I couldn't.

-Look, I know giving bad news is difficult,

but you got to man up.

No, I mean I actually couldn't. Physically.

She's gone.

You can't do this to my son.

-Do what?

-Tempt him.

Well, it's his lucky day, then. I'm all out of apples.

-I just gave him some options. It's his choice.

-It's not a choice.

-It's a Faustian pact.

-Just because you don't understand or appreciate your son's chosen career...

-I was actually trying to help.

-You will destroy him!

I love my son and have supported him,

will support him in whatever he chooses to do.

He can pick up rubbish for all I care.

So long as he does it with integrity.

Was your father a doctor?

-No.

-But he could have been?

Just as you could have been anything you wanted to be? You just had to choose, right?

And whatever it was - you were going to make it look easy.

Josh chose the hardest option. The path least likely.

He worked harder, longer

and with more integrity than anyone else to get where he is.

And then you come along and encourage him to cheat.

It's not his nature, do you understand?

He'll do it and it will live with him forever.

He will grow to hate himself.

Because he did things your way.

The easy way.

Did you see that? Crazy or what?

If you're going to your presentation, you might need that.

Gemma, wait. I'm sorry, OK.

-Let me explain.

-What's to explain? You did what you wanted to.

Like you always do. Because you know best.

-He stitched you up. And you were going to let him get away with it.

-That's my choice.

Well, it was my choice until you just took it away from me.

Can you not see that?

And don't you dare try and say you did this for me, because you didn't. You did it this for yourself.

Haven't you got somewhere to be?

You've been waiting ever since you arrived to get off this hellhole of a ward.

Now's your chance.

Let me get this straight. You've lost a blind woman.

-I didn't lose her - she left.

-Well, she couldn't have gotten far.

This is serious, Michael.

The MRI showed the Churg-Strauss is eating away at her insides.

She needs a bowel resection.

She knows this?

No. I... I didn't tell her.

Why not?

Well, find her. Fix her.

Is that why you asked me to tell her? Because you couldn't?

Why?

You're 'The Malick'.

She spent her last few months working on a project.

-A research project.

-What was it about?

I don't know. Mortality or something.

-You didn't talk about it?

-Sort of.

No. Not really. It was her thing. I didn't want to get between it.

You make it sound like it's a clandestine relationship.

Like she was meeting an ex-boyfriend.

You don't get jealous about a research project. That would be crazy.

You can get jealous of time, though. Time spent...elsewhere.

Time wasted, perhaps. When time is precious.

It wasn't wasted, though. She finished it. Pretty much.

-You've read it?

-No.

It was her thing. Her legacy.

Feels like it would be...

-I don't know...prying.

-But surely the point of a legacy is that it's shared?

Er, I see you found my portfolio.

Did you arrange a theatre slot for Mr Cohen's colectomy?

No. He hasn't consented. Not yet.

-What's he waiting for? A better offer?

-Funnily enough...

He wanted to delay, so Dr Tressler suggested a three-week course of corticosteroids.

Now, I could have sworn I handed this case over to YOU.

What do you want from me?

He is my senior doctor - did you want me

to ignore him and the patient's wishes?

Or did you want me to come running to you and grass him up?

I've done everything I can to please you.

To not rock the boat,

and still you treat me like I'm some sort of annoying smudge

damping the glow of rising stars like Dr Valentine and Dr Tressler.

Well, I'm sorry, but I'm never going to be like them.

Finished?

I think so. Yes.

Excellent.

I've been waiting for that.

And it was well worth the wait.

PAGER BLEEPS

Oh, duty calls.

Do get that consent, won't you?

Oh, and er... Your e-portfolio is fine.

What are you doing, Carmen?

Waiting for you.

Figured you'd send Dr Digby to deliver the bad news.

Thought I wouldn't make it easy for you.

The Churg-Strauss

is attacking your intestinal tract.

It can be halted with a bowel resection.

However, the damage is such that the resection will almost

certainly leave you with SBS - short bowel syndrome.

It will to all intents and purposes...

..make you an invalid.

Thank you. I shall make arrangements as soon as I'm able.

That's it? You're not angry?

Bitter?

What's the point? It is what it is. I have to adapt.

-And there's always that tiny sliver of hope.

-What do you mean?

Maybe if I get the doctor you were talking about earlier.

The dashing Adonis. The talented man...

What if he's a fraud?

What if after all the media hype and excitement's wiped away, he's just...

..he just keeps making the same mistakes.

Maybe his judgement is suspect.

Maybe he needs to change.

Into the type of man who sends a junior doctor to deliver bad news?

I don't know about you, but I prefer the sound of the other guy,

the one at the top of his game.

I'll see if I can track him down.

Why did you become a doctor?

To prove I could.

To who?

Initially my dad. Then my sister.

Finally myself.

Well, you sure showed you.

No, I haven't.

How about you? Why'd you become a doctor?

I just want to help people.

No, because I could.

I'm good at most of it.

Listen, I'm really sorry about the e-mail. It was petty.

-Gemma had nothing to do with it, by the way.

-So she told me.

She really doesn't deserve to be caught up in all this.

It's a bit late for that.

No, it's not. I'll pull out of the CT2. It's yours.

But you've got to tell the truth to Ms Campbell.

She's got Gemma on the hook. Gemma doesn't deserve that.

-I can't.

-Why not?

-I can't take the risk of being found out.

-They'll find a way to forgive you. They always do.

You don't understand. It's too late.

Ready for you, Dr Valentine.

I'm sorry.

Professor Hope is in theatre and won't be joining us

for the foreseeable future.

Ms Campbell has kindly stepped into the breach.

Thank you.

My research topic is an homage to my late wife, Dr Tara Lo.

"Living under a shadow -

"Attitudes and aspects to mortality in the terminally ill."

Hmm, that's interesting.

Necrotised intestine?

No, the intestinal wall. What's all that stuff?

Vasculitis and eosinophilic infiltration.

-It's everywhere.

-Repeated damage. Repeated healing.

It's narrowed towards the bowel.

Isn't that similar to a stricture?

It's not similar to a stricture, it IS...

Arthur, you're a genius.

-I am?

-Define stricture.

-Narrowing of the lumen of the bowel, forcing contents into fissures and ulcers.

-Surgical option?

Strictureplasty.

Widening the narrow segment with a cut lengthwise across the bowel

pushing the two cuts together.

Particularly helpful for those who have already had extensive bowel rese...

Mr Malick, you're a genius.

I am, aren't I?

We're back in business!

"Patient X is experiencing symptoms - syncope and nausea,

"with headaches controlled by analgesia."

"The decision to defer treatment hangs over us.

"My partner hides it but the fear is turning to anger.

"Blame will be next. And who can blame him? Not me.

"It's because he loves me. And that's all that matters."

"We've made a joke out of the sense of time looming over us.

"We count our relationship out in the context of hours

"and minutes rather than months or years."

"Today was our 5,047th hour anniversary."

-Sorry.

-Dr Valentine?

Tara...?

-'Who else am I supposed to blame for pushing the operation?'

-But it wasn't your decision.

It was...it was shared. We were partners.

You shared everything?

Not her research. Her private work.

Private being the operative word.

And that took her away from you. Took time away from you.

I had to give her space, didn't I?

Of course. You'd have been selfish, otherwise.

It's not selfish to want to spend time with the person that you love.

You're either in or you're out, you know?

In love with life or in love with death. And sometimes it felt like she was in love with death.

I'm just...so angry with her.

I can't...

I can't forgive her for leaving me.

For being with me.

It's OK. It's normal.

It shouldn't be.

How can I blame someone for dying? For having a tumour. That's horrible.

And if I could feel that way - be that horrible about someone

I claimed to have loved,

doesn't that make all of it, everything - a lie?

Just one big fraud.

Only you can decide what you want to believe in.

I guess the question is, do you really believe your time with Tara was a lie?

This is the lie.

Dr Valentine?

Sorry.

It's just I shouldn't be here doing this.

It's wrong.

None of this is my work. I plagiarised it from my wife.

-From Tara.

-Dr Valentine...

-No...it's all right.

I need to stop lying. I'm stopping now. Ms Campbell...?

Tell Dr Wilde, I'm sorry. For lying about the chest drain.

It was inexcusable.

Dr Valentine...

Oliver... you understand the consequences of this...

Yes...you'll have my resignation.

It's just...

There's somewhere I need to be.

Tough crowd?

It would appear you have won the position by default.

Default? Way to go, me.

You did what you could. That's all anyone can do.

Good colour. Normal respiration.

What are you doing sneaking about?

I could ask you the same question.

It's my office.

Why are you in the dark?

Is that a muffin?

-My Precious.

-What's going on with you?

You've been acting weird for weeks.

At least I'm not having a complete nervous breakdown.

Neither am I.

Anymore.

What's your excuse?

What's with all the cloak and dagger?

Look after Professor Hope for me, will you?

Sure.

Who's going to look after you?

I'll be fine. I just need some time out.

What about you?

I'm pregnant.

If you hug me, I'll puke.

See you around, Naylor.

I'm afraid the tests show the corticosteroids

simply won't have any effect.

You'll be a walking - or running - time-bomb.

Josh...you'll find something else.

Might take some time, but you'll find it.

Mr Cohen's consent form.

Have you heard? Valentine's gone. Resigned or suspended.

Yeah I had noticed. You know, being there and all.

And I also heard that you turned down the Darwin CT2 position.

I don't know. I guess the idea of winning my place by default was...

well, it struck me as quite tacky.

Plus - every parasite needs a host, right?

Did you have any idea this was coming?

If I did, I couldn't tell you.

You had another session with him this morning.

And...?

I sensed there was a crisis coming.

Crisis? And you were happy with that?

Can't spell 'catharsis' without 'crisis'.

Hang on - there's another "I".

Oliver.

You didn't think I'd make it that easy for you?

Course not. I wouldn't have it any other way.

Look, Oliver, I'm sorry...

Don't be. There's nothing to be sorry about.

This is a good thing.

Thank you. For standing by me.

Even when I didn't deserve it.

-I'll be back.

-No. You won't.

See you, Professor Hope.

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