Crush Holby City

MUSIC: "Holby City Theme"

MONITOR BEEPS

I believe...that your grandfather is a Nazi war criminal.

-Just admit you don't want me here!

-Speak up, ladies,

I don't think they heard that in reception.

If I were to work here, would that make your life difficult?

Absolutely not.

-Is this your idea of keeping an eye on someone?

-Sorry, I...

You need to get this wrist examined.

Well, are we going to carry on with the IVF?

I don't think it's a good idea.

What about the way you keep hanging around my wife?

-I suppose that's innocent as well, is it?

-Let go!

CAR HORN BLARES

Wake up, Dr Tressler! Almost ran you over!

SIREN WAILS

-What's up?

-Hmm?

-You've hardly said a word all the way here.

-I'm just tired.

-Guilty, Your Honour.

-I shouldn't have woke you up so early.

-No...

I'm really glad you did that.

Mm!

-Shall we go in?

-Yeah.

I was thinking we could try that new tapas place after work.

-Do you fancy it?

-It's too early to talk about food.

-You're not coming down with something, are you?

-No, just...

-What is it?

-Oh...nothing. I'm just...

Don't want you to be late for this MDT meeting!

-Do you want anything?

-Oh, espresso, please.

-Change your mind?

-Come back when it's quieter.

Boo! Not interrupting your hectic schedule am I?

Um, are you kidding me?! I'll have you know,

bed baths - three, beds stripped - five, cups of tea made - seven.

And way up in front, bed pans emptied - ten.

But annoying older sisters coming in to work on their day off...one.

Some of us have got important paperwork to get on with.

Some of us spend too much time thinking we're important radio stars.

This came for you.

Oh, yeah, I know what this is, it's a promo.

Some company found out about the gala tonight and sent this through.

-Probably want an endorsement.

-Yeah, that'll be it.

"For Dr Mo, have fun tonight." Ohh!

-Mm! Want one?

-No, you go first.

I want to make sure they're not poisoned.

Mm! Mm!

Mm! Mm! Mmm!

Right, well, if anyone needs me,

I'll be in the office checking out the rest of these cupcakes.

MO CHUCKLES

-Good morning.

-Morning!

See you later.

Good morning. One double-shot cappuccino

and a blueberry muffin.

For me? That's very kind.

Let me give you some money.

My treat.

I owe you.

Hi, Mum. Sorry about yesterday, it was late by the time I got in.

Look, I'll call round later if that's OK? Say about six?

All right, I'll see you then. Bye.

You've already asked me to do that. Unless you want me to do it twice?

-No, just the once.

-Right, you're going to have to treat me

-like you would any other nurse.

-Of course.

-Sorry to interrupt. Morning.

-Morning.

-How are you?

I'm fine. What have you got for me?

I have Irene Taylor, sweet old dear in bed one,

she used to be a professional tennis player.

ER...she's also in for an SFA angioplasty.

I'll assess her. What time is she booked in?

She is the last one, half four. I'll print the list off.

LIFT PINGS

-Essie.

-Ooh!

-Morning.

-SHE LAUGHS

-Made me jump! Is this what you do, sneak up on people?

-No.

I was just finishing my coffee, I looked up and there you were. So...

Now, are you on AAU?

-Yeah.

-Right, well, I'm going to show you where it is.

How was the funeral?

Wow! No, "You're looking nice"? No, "Are you all set?"

Sorry. Sorry, I suppose that was a bit thoughtless.

Shall we start again? Thank you for meeting me.

-I really appreciate it.

-I was genuinely just...

-I know.

-The funeral hasn't happened yet, there have been some delays.

-Oh?

-I really don't want to talk about it.

-OK. Of course. Of course.

Thanks.

Well, by the way, if I may say, you do look very, very nice.

And...are you all set?

-Do you mind?!

-Sorry.

One of the nurses said you were in here.

I just wanted to get your input on something.

What is it?

The dosage of anti-epileptics for Jake Turner, bed six.

I've checked them, they're fine.

Anything else?

You missed a button.

-Cut it out, Harry.

-Cut what out?

-We agreed to carry on as normal,

to keep some distance.

-What happened between us was a mistake.

-Your words not mine.

-It

-was

-a mistake, so stop playing games.

Like this, like the coffee. Stop trying to stir things up.

-Too strong?

-Yeah, you're being...

No, I mean the coffee. Was it too strong?

What if Raf had seen us?

-Should I have got him one too?

-Oh, hilarious(!)

Just hilarious, Harry!

All I'm asking you to do is to just...stop this!

-Are you crying?

-No, I'm not.

-Sorry, it's my breakfast.

-Oh.

-Kippers with garlic butter.

They won't let me eat it down in gynae for some reason.

No? It really stinks!

-Yeah, it really does. It's delicious though. Do you want some?

-No.

-Can I pick your brain?

-Yeah, of course.

A friend of mine's just completed a course of IVF,

which didn't take, and now just over a month on,

she's missed her period and thinks she might be pregnant.

I told her I didn't think that was very likely.

Well, it's possible, depending on her natural level of fertility,

plus maybe there's another reason why they couldn't get pregnant.

The best thing she can do is speak to her IVF doctor.

What if her partner has a low count or low motility?

Well, that would lower the probability,

but again it's not impossible.

Remember, it only takes one healthy sperm

to make it past the finish line.

-SHE LAUGHS

-Life finds a way.

Unless, of course, your friend's partner isn't the father? Err!

Please, Jac. Look, this is ridiculous.

We don't need to involve anyone else.

I mean, surely this is something that we can work out between us?

Like adults. For Emma's sake.

-Don't do that.

-OK, I'm...I'm just asking you to say yes

to a couple of hours on Saturday or Sunday.

Really, how difficult do we need to make this?

Look, my aunt's down for the weekend

and it would really make her visit

if she could meet her great-niece and give her a cuddle.

-Poor wee Auntie Agnes(!)

-It's a couple of hours, Jac.

Are you going to keep this up all day?

-Unless you give me an answer.

-Fine.

-So is that a "yes"?

It's a yes...that you need to make a formal request via your solicitor.

-Please?

-And then I'll consider it.

PHONE BUZZES

-Hey, Mo.

-'Hello!'

-Finally. Listen, what are you doing for lunch?

'Doctor Mo can't take your call right now. Leave a message.

'No hawkers, no stalkers.'

-Cake!

-Oh, thank you.

So you never did tell me who your plus-one was for tonight.

I haven't got one.

-Oh.

-Why, you offering, Mr T?

-Me?

Ah, well...I'm not sure what Nicky would make of me

cavorting with celebrities.

What with the paparazzi and everything, wouldn't like that.

Yeah. That photographer from the Holby Gazette can be demanding.

-Yeah.

-Mrs Johnson.

Her GP referred her, suspected torsion of an ovarian cyst.

-Ultrasound results are in there.

-OK.

-Bed four.

-Right, thank you.

So, Mo, who else is going tonight?

Lots of celebs. Mike Batt.

-You know, the Wombles guy.

-Ah...

-You know Huw Edwards, right?

-The newsreader?

-Yeah, his wife actually is going to be there.

Sounds just like the Oscars.

-So who else?

-Tom Jones.

-BOTH: Tom Jones?!

This is Tom Jones. He collapsed on stage

with chest pains and breathing difficulties.

-H.

-Hello, darling.

-Harry...

Deep breath, please, Mr...?

-Jones! Tom Jones.

-Yeah, don't make me have to ask you again.

-Vince Tracy.

-Deep breath, please, Mr Tracy.

I'm the Southwest's number one Tom Jones impersonator at your service.

Hmm. Right, rhonchi at the apex

and...bronchial breathing in the lower lobes.

-Could you take him to X-ray, please, and then transfer him up to Darwin.

-Sure.

Erm...you're not going to this bash at the town hall tonight, are you?

-No. Big do, is it?

-Huge.

Are you going?

Doctor Mo,

host of Holby's number one medical phone-in show...at your service.

Great. Now she's bigger than Tom Jones.

I've got a cholecystectomy

booked for three that I could move, I suppose.

-That would be a great help.

-I'm giving in far too easily, aren't I?

I should barter really?

I'll see your angioplasty and I raise you a cholecystectomy?

-Not that we should gamble with our patients. I mean that would be...

-Wrong.

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

Mum! What are you doing here? You don't have physio today.

Yes, I know that. I'm here on a social visit.

Well, that's...most unexpected.

You didn't get my message?

No. Well, I'm a bit rushed at the moment...but lunch?

-Not for you. A social visit to check up on Roger.

-Roger?

Roger, yes. My warden, Roger.

-Mum, Roger's not here.

-Really, Serena!

Is it any wonder the NHS is all over the news.

You don't even know your own patients.

There he is.

Roger, you poor dear! How are you?

-Snap! Get it?

-Oh.

-Reckon I was feeling left out.

-Oh!

-What are you doing here? You didn't need to come in.

-I'm here to check up on you.

-That's very sweet.

Isn't it?

-Ms Campbell, how nice to see you again.

-Ohh!

I had to get away.

Those blasted busybodies

were singing songs around the piano again.

I keep telling your mother

she should join the jolly singsong club.

-It's good for the soul.

-It's barely singing.

Well, this is fascinating, but care to tell me what happened?

He fell. I am not joining a choir.

It's not a choir, it's a singing group.

It's a gaggle of chirping hens.

-Right, I'll take over Mr Sullivan's care.

-Oh, goody.

Severely displaced distal radius fracture.

Concussion caused by the head wound.

-AAU just sent him up for obs.

-Thanks.

So, is there anything we need to know?

Are you on any medication?

Well, I have an inhaler...for my asthma.

And I took some codeine just after the fall.

I have a prescription, for emergencies.

Roger's allergic to aspirin.

-Ibuprofen too.

-Oh, yes, and ibuprofen.

NSAID anaphylactic, they call that.

Yes, thank you. Right, so...where exactly did you fall?

HE LAUGHS

It's really silly. I was...

I was watering the hanging baskets out the front

and I fell off the ladder, soaked myself with the hose.

Landed with a right thud and a clatter.

It was my fault. I should have turned the water off.

-Don't worry about it, love, it was just an accident.

-What do you mean?

She probably means the hose. I do apologise.

The last thing a busy lady like you needs

is another accident-prone wally clogging up your wards.

Quite.

So, do you get loads of women throwing their knickers on stage?

-HE COUGHS

-Thankfully, no.

-That's a pity.

-Not at all. Cor! Some of the dives I play,

I'm grateful the old crones keep their knickers on.

THEY LAUGH Hiya.

This is Vince. Re-routed by Mo.

-Ms Effanga.

-Hmm?

-Basic ward etiquette. It's Ms Effanga, not Mo.

And this is Mr Tracy not Vince.

-You can call me Mr Jones, if you'd prefer.

-No, I wouldn't.

-Take him to bay three.

-Please.

-Excuse me?

-You forgot to say "please".

Basic ward etiquette, Ms Naylor.

This is Katharine Leeson. She's 24 years old

and she has a severe crush trauma.

Suspected broken ribs and she's presented breathing difficulties.

No sign of a flail chest. Can you clear a side room for me?

-Are you her doctor?

-No, her vet.

I mean, not her vet, obviously. The zoo's vet. Toby Matthews.

You might want to check her notes.

She had an aortic valve replacement two years ago. She's on warfarin.

Thanks. We'll need to sort out her clotting. Can you check her INR?

-What happened to her?

-We were moving Bobo between enclosures and she

suddenly grabbed Kath and pinned her against one of the bars.

She lost consciousness. Kath, that is, not Bobo.

-Bobo?

-An elephant. A female African elephant.

Right.

BEEPING SHE WHIMPERS

SATS falling! SHE GASPS

Trachea's deviated. Tension pneumothorax.

We need an urgent needle decompression.

Side room now. I want Sanplex and two units of FFP.

-Amy, can you calculate the dosage?

-Got it. And I'll get onto haematology.

We can't put in a formal chest drain

until we've reversed her warfarin. In we go.

BEEPING

Let's do this thoracostomy.

Then we'll put a drain in once the Sanplex improves her clotting.

Is that right?

Spot-on. Estelle, isn't it?

-I prefer Essie.

-Her SATs are 91 on 100% oxygen.

-Doctor Tressler, could you chase up the CT spine report for me, please?

-BEEPING

-Nurse? Essie, could you do it?

-Now, please, Dr Tressler.

We can't remove this collar until we know if she has a spinal injury.

I'll get onto the ED.

BEEPING

-How long have you had these chest pains?

-HE COUGHS

On and off for a while.

-Weeks, months?

-Much of the last year.

It's nothing, really, it's just asthma.

Tell Jonny what...Nurse Maconie what you do.

Is he by any chance an Elvis impersonator?

Tom Jones! And not just any Tom Jones impersonator.

-Go on.

-Breathe in for me.

-I'm the Southwest's

-leading

-Tom Jones impersonator.

-Oh, so there's more than one of you? And out.

-HE COUGHS

I was at rehearsals for this big wedding tonight when this happened.

-You still think I'll be able to make it?

-Yeah, of course.

-You'll be out of here before they start the speeches.

-Actually, I would ignore Effanga Junior here.

As your surgeon, I would advise you to call the wedding party

and tell them there'll be no Delilah at the reception tonight.

Full bloods, chest X-ray, CT scan.

Sure.

I have no idea what you ever saw in her.

-Shouldn't you be getting back downstairs?

-Or I could stay up here.

Oh, yeah. Go on, darling, you stay here.

-Start putting your jewellery in here.

-Colette's quite keen for me to get experience on different wards,

so I reckon she'll be well up for it.

Don't look too excited.

And will you run off an INR as soon as the drugs are in?

No, Katharine Leeson. L-E-E-S-O-N.

-Crush trauma.

-Ms Teo?

-Amy, please.

-Amy.

The Sanplex dose is done by weight and INR. So 2,000 units?

-Perfect.

-Thanks.

Can you believe it?! He's got me chasing X-rays now as well.

Mein Fuhrer.

-What was that?

-Mm?

-Was that aimed at me?

What?!

Yes, great. Could you e-mail them? Cheers.

Is she German or something?

-HE SIGHS

-Is he like this at home too?

"Amy, load the dishwasher then iron my socks."

Old Raffaello just loves to delegate those menial tasks, doesn't he?

Look, if you were feeling charitable, you could help me out,

have a word in his ear.

And say what? "Doctor Tressler is your friend. Trust Doctor Tressler."

-Just get him to give me something to do.

-And why would I do that?

-To help me out.

-Why would I do that?

Do I need to spell it out?

Up to you.

-Let me just make you a little bit more comfortable.

-LAUGHTER

Dr Copeland?

I wonder...would you do me a favour?

Five broken ribs and a ruptured spleen.

It's a miracle it's not worse.

Do you think she needs an emergency splenectomy?

-Shall I check if there are any theatres available?

-As a first step,

we should try interventional radiology.

Well, if you were to consider a splenectomy, I'd love to lead it.

So, you're suggesting we remove this lady's spleen

so you can tick off an index procedure for your CT2 training?

-Seems a tad cavalier.

-Obviously, only if she needs it.

Which at this point, she doesn't.

-Oh.

-Yes, you want me to phone radiology for you.

I just wondered if I could come in?

I'll reserve judgment till I've tasted one.

But I doubt very much that the NHS's lemon drizzle cake is a patch on mine.

-Oh.

-Mr Sullivan.

Roger. Now's your chance to tell me how you really ended up in here.

Like I said, it was just an accident.

Then why does my mother feel the need to check up on you?

-Maybe she just cares about me?

-Or maybe she feels responsible.

There was a bit of water on the floor of your mum's bathroom.

-Go on.

-A tiny leak.

I slipped on the lino, hit my head on the sink.

I knew you'd worry it could've been her and I'm sorry.

I assure you, I'll mend any flood damage.

So now it's a flood?

HE SIGHS

Your mother left the bath running and forgot about it.

The lady in the flat beneath alerted me to water dripping from her ceiling.

I promised I wouldn't say anything.

The thing is when I went up to your mum's,

she was sat in the lounge listening to the radio with a fresh pot of tea.

She didn't even remember ever turning the bath on.

Raf, have you seen this?

The Danes are investing in a new ECMO unit.

Danes as in Danish Danes?

Yeah. And they're looking for someone to head up their programme.

It's just outside Copenhagen. I've always wanted to go there.

What do you think? Worth considering?

You want to move to Denmark?!

It's just a short-term contract... until they're up and running.

Why are you showing me this?

It's a progressive teaching hospital, exciting new project,

-I thought you'd jump at it.

-Copenhagen?

When have you ever mentioned Copenhagen?

Just read the article and job description. Keep an open mind.

I called her parents, they're on their way.

MONITOR BEEPS

It's OK if I stay until they get here? Sure.

Only I'm...I'm not family.

You're friends though, right?

I guess so. She's studying to be a veterinary nurse. We talk.

-Only about elephants.

-Is that your thing then, elephants?

Amazing creatures.

Such a complex social hierarchy.

Yeah, I know, I've seen The Jungle Book.

Actually, Disney got it wrong.

In a real herd the matriarch calls all the shots,

and if she doesn't like one of the bulls...she lets him know.

'Doctor Mo can't take your call right now. Leave a message...'

If I hear Mo's voice-mail message once more, I'll scream.

-She's just busy.

-Don't make excuses for her.

The reason why my sister isn't answering her phone

-is because she has her head so far up her backside, she can't hear it ringing.

-Maybe.

She thinks all I'm fit for is cleaning out bedpans.

I'm thinking of getting a nose-peg surgically grafted.

I'm sorry you have to work up here.

I know it can't be easy, what with Bonnie.

And now having to deal with the porcelain witch day in, day out.

Mo tells me she won't even let you see your own kid.

That is unbelievable!

Do you need me to do anything?

I can amass an army and storm her castle.

Or you could show me some proper nursing.

-Come on, then.

-Really?

-Uh-huh.

I should've known Roger would wither under your Medusa stare.

And now you're going to make a mountain out of a molehill,

like you always do!

Mum, look we have all left the bath running and forgotten about it.

-That's not why I'm annoyed.

-But you are annoyed.

-Because you didn't tell me.

-Because I knew you'd be annoyed!

SHE SIGHS

-What if it had been the gas?

-Oh, what if, what if!

Really, Serena! Would you like me to touch my nose

and count backwards from 20 in French?

Would that convince you that I haven't gone round the twist?

OK! OK...I'll drop it.

Why don't we have dinner later?

Yes! I'd like that!

MONITOR BEEPS

SHE GASPS

Excuse me!

Excuse me, I think she's woken up!

Call Mr Di Lucca, please.

Good afternoon, Katharine. I'm Dr Tressler. Can you hear me?

-Can you hear me?

-How is she?

-Is she lucid?

-I'm not sure.

-What do you mean, you're not sure?

-I've only...

-Just let me.

Hello, Katharine, I'm Mr Di Lucca.

I'm a general surgeon here at Holby City Hospital.

You were involved in an accident. Can you remember what happened?

-I'm in hospital?

-Holby City.

Oh. Hey, Tobes. Didn't see you there.

Hello.

So I really did have a cuddle with a two-tonne elephant?

I was hoping that was just a bad dream.

-Can you tell me what you remember?

-Erm...

I remember Bobo in the chute being a stubborn cow

and then I remember her reaching for me.

I thought she was just checking if I had any food.

And then I remember being crushed

and not being able to breathe...or move.

-MONITOR BEEPS

-It was awful!

SHE SOBS

Sorry. Excuse me.

Hi.

What's going on?

-Nothing.

-Right.

Because "nothing" explains why you're trying to get me to move to Denmark

or bursting into tears at the drop of a hat?

Look, it's nothing.

Just the hormones.

You know, eventually you'll have to tell me what it is.

SHE SIGHS

Right, 30 milligrams of codeine might make you feel a little drowsy.

I don't mind moving into number 23 for a few nights,

but where would Mrs Moore sleep?

-Mrs Moore moved out.

-There you go. How was that?

-Thank you.

-Well, no-one told me she'd moved out.

Mrs Moore passed away about a month ago.

We went to her funeral? That little church?

You all right, Mrs McKinnie? Can I get you anything?

Water. Water.

-There you go.

-Thank you.

Right, Dr Copeland, what's next?

Bed four, obs. And then prep Mrs Taylor for theatre.

-That's better.

-You have a doze, dear. Don't mind me.

Just 40 winks, eh?

SHE SIGHS

Did I tell you...Serena's taking me out tonight?

She's a good girl.

We're waiting for the radiologist to take a look at your spleen

and then we'll make a decision as to how to proceed.

I bet you don't have many elephant victims in here.

No. No, you're my first.

You don't know where Toby is, do you?

Er...I think he went to get a cuppa.

He probably went back to the zoo, knowing him.

Yeah, married-to-the-job type, is he?

No, married to his animals.

Do you know, sometimes he talks to them?

-Really? What's he say?

-All sorts.

I once heard him discussing the football results

-with a sick rhinoceros.

-Ah! That's sweet.

I suppose.

-SHE SIGHS

-Eczema's playing up.

It's the bane of my life.

You wouldn't be able to give me some cream, would you?

Do you mind if I take a look?

It's just there, on the other side.

Essie, have you seen this?

ALARM Mrs McKinnie, stop doing that. I need to take his blood pressure.

-But he's having an asthma attack!

-Mum, come and sit down.

Come on. Sit here.

-Stay there.

-Here you go, Rog.

-BP is 90/34. Pulse 138.

Anaphylactic shock. His airway's compromised. Get a crash trolley.

We need IV hydrocortisone and adrenaline.

-Mum, what happened?

-I don't know!

-Serena, what's going on? Serena?!

-Dr Copeland.

Mrs McKinnie, come with me and I'll make you a nice cup of tea.

-But what about Roger?

-He will be absolutely fine.

Tracey can you get the curtains, please?

-It's all right, Roger. It's all right.

-Did you give him codeine?

-30 milligrams.

-Anything else?

-No.

-You sure?

-I administered it myself, Dr Copeland witnessed.

His drug chart says allergic to NSAIDs.

HE WHEEZES

Well, he's stable now.

Looks like we caught it in time.

Oh, silly me. I'll just clear that up.

I take it you've got this?

HE SIGHS

-Have you seen Ms Teo?

-Nope.

Ames, it's me. Katharine Leeson has developed a rash.

May be linked to her warfarin or maybe an overdose?

Probably best you review her meds before surgery.

-You've opted to do the splenectomy?

-Yes.

-You didn't tell me.

-Should I have?

-Well, we spoke about it earlier.

-Yes, I remember.

This is a key procedure for me.

Yes, and when I think you're ready, then I'll bear that in mind.

Now, if you see Ms Teo, will you send her my way? Thanks.

Roger suffered an anaphylactic shock and we have to find out why.

You said it was an asthma attack.

Er, no. Mum, you said yourself Roger is allergic to aspirin.

-Well, he is.

-Did you give him anything?

-Mind your tone!

-Mum.

-You are always doing this!

Always pinning things on me!

-Vingt, dix-neuf, dix-huit, dix-sept...

-Mum, please.

-..seize, quinze, quatorze, treize, douze...

-Mum, you won't get into trouble.

-..onze, dix, neuf...

-Stop it!

..huit, sept, six, cinq, quatre, trois, deux, un!

-What did you give him?

-Nothing!

I had a headache.

I fixed myself an aspirin.

I have a terrible feeling for some reason...

I...I might have given it to Roger.

-Did Kath send you to find me?

-No...I just needed some air.

-Mind if I join you?

-Of course.

I mean, no, I don't mind.

SHE SIGHS

It's a lot easier dealing with animals than humans.

I beg to differ.

I've never had to treat a human being with sharp teeth or claws.

Or a trunk. At least you can talk to humans.

You can talk to animals.

I mean, I know they're wild creatures

and their points of reference are askew to ours, but...

"If a lion could speak, we could not understand him."

Wittgenstein.

Do you think he was right?

What if they understand us?

This thing that happened with Kath, I think it was my fault.

-Your fault?

-And if I tell Kath,

I'm afraid she'll never talk to me again, so I'm thinking...don't tell her.

That's what other people would do, right?

Just forget it ever happened and...carry on.

-That depends.

-On what?

On whether you can live with yourself after.

After the gig, he walks up to me and he says,

"With a voice like that we should get you on The Voice."

Imagine that! That would be amazing.

Why are you still here?

Actually, she's helping me.

-Mr Tracy, we have your results back.

-Everything's OK and I can go home?

No. You have COPD, pulmonary disease.

It's at a pretty advanced state.

-I've never even smoked.

-But I'm guessing you've been in venues where other people have?

Ten years ago, yeah, every pub and club from here to Blackpool.

Well, there is a procedure, lung reduction surgery,

where we'll remove the damaged lung tissue.

Long-term, you'll need an inhaler and I'll also refer you for chest physio.

Well, realistically, when will I be back on stage?

Er...your singing days are over. Sorry.

Wow! Award-winning people skills.

-Adele.

-Excuse me?!

-Oh, sorry, I forgot,

you're not used to people correcting you.

-I'm not used to an HCA correcting me.

-Ms Naylor.

-Good. Picking up on my pay grade.

-Well, it's bit more than that.

-At least your sister has earned the stripes to talk to me in that manner.

-Jac!

I want you back down on AAU, off my ward.

-Do you understand?

-I understand.

-Good.

I also understand that the correct grievance procedure

is for you to raise your concerns with the clinical nurse manager,

who will either deal with the issue directly or escalate it to the Director of Nursing,

whom I believe has the final say on all nursing decisions.

Even on your ward.

I can give Ms Sheward a call and ask her to pop up, if you like?

You can just...prep Mr Tracy for theatre.

-Please.

-Please!

Wow! I should probably call Colette myself

and see if I can hire you for my solicitor.

HE LAUGHS

-How are you feeling?

-Like I've been mauled by a lion.

Do you...do you remember what happened?

I worked it out.

Judging by that look on your face, I think I got it right.

Don't worry, mum's the word.

Last thing I'd ever do is put her through the mill.

Thank you. I appreciate your looking out for her.

Well, someone has to, you're always so busy.

That's really none of your business.

I didn't mean it like that. I know how hard you work.

It's just she always makes excuses for you.

Blames your work, blames the weather,

blames herself for getting her days mixed up.

Your mum's one of the good 'uns.

I'm going to be sad to lose her, but...

she can't stay living where she is for much longer.

-We just don't have the facilities to look after her.

-I'll hire someone in.

That's not always the answer.

For your mum's sake, it might be best if she had more dedicated care.

I think I know what's best for my own mother, don't you?

Dr Copeland...cancel the rest of my list for today, please.

-Of course.

-Thanks.

Hi, it's Serena.

Well, I was hoping you might be able to help me with something.

-Hi.

-Oh, I wondered where you'd got to. Didn't you get my messages?

Yeah. I just needed some fresh air. Did you want me to take a look?

I've asked dermatology to give an opinion. Thanks.

I thought it might be a reaction to her warfarin?

-No, it's not that.

-Maybe an infection? Chicken pox, measles?

-Herpes simplex?

-I don't have herpes!

What about rubella?

-Rubella?!

-Yeah, I'll ask infectious diseases to take a look.

Infectious? Brilliant!

Would you excuse me a minute?

A ball and a man and a...

Oh, for God's sake, Adrienne!

A car.

-Very good. Now, can you subtract 7 away from 100?

-93.

And another seven from that?

86.

Spell "world" backwards?

These are easy. D-L-R-O-W.

Can you repeat the last three things I asked you to remember?

A ball...

and a...

-A ball...

-SHE SIGHS

It begins with a C, I think.

A ball...

Oh, blast! It's gone.

Well, don't worry, we'll come back to that.

Now I'm going to hold up two objects, I'd like you to name them.

Pencil.

Time.

Ames! Amy?

I'm OK. I'm OK. Don't... I just freaked out.

All that talk of pathogens and contagions.

Look, what's going on? And don't say nothing.

Just tell me what it is.

-I can't.

-You can't?!

What do you mean you can't?

Look, Raf...

It's early days...

I think I'm pregnant.

-What?

-I did a test earlier and I just kind of knew.

I was right.

I tested positive.

Are you all right?

HE SIGHS

HE LAUGHS

There you are, interlocking pentagons and with my left hand.

SHE LAUGHS

I enjoyed that. You're a bit like a younger Chris Tarrant.

HE LAUGHS

Well, did I win the jackpot?

16?!

That doesn't seem terribly promising.

27 or above is the benchmark.

-Oh.

-But a lower score can be explained by a myriad of factors.

-It's really not conclusive, by any means.

-But it is indicative?

Yes.

Right, I'll leave you two to discuss things.

Mrs McKinnie, it has been an absolute pleasure.

Thank you.

Well...

Are you wallowing?

It's not like you to wallow.

-I'm thinking.

-You're wallowing.

Maybe a bit.

Might I suggest, instead of wallowing,

we work out what to do next?

Isn't that what us McKinnies do?

I'm going to inject antibiotics into this IV port.

-Can I do it?

-Er...no.

I don't need antibiotics.

I need someone to put me out of my misery.

Hey. What did I say? Ms Naylor doesn't have a crystal ball.

It might not be as bad as she says, OK?

You're lovely you are. Ain't she lovely, Tom?

-HE MIMICS TOM JONES

-I concur. She's bloody gorgeous.

Watch and learn.

Actually, this next job you could probably do yourself.

So...

you've just got to mix the bag.

-OK.

-Whoa! No, sorry.

Er...gently and slowly.

-Right.

-OK.

Nicely done.

My office!

Are you aware of how many hospital regulations you just violated?

She was under my supervision the whole time.

Well, perhaps you'd like her to assist in theatre later?

What are her nerves like? Does she have a steady hand?

Can she hold a scalpel?

-I was just trying to help her.

-I want her off my ward.

I heard you the first time,

but Colette has arranged to transfer Adele up here permanently.

-No-one consulted me.

-Well, technically, no-one has to.

Although, I did pop down to the wet labs and ran the idea past Elliot.

He loved it.

Two hours, Jac. I asked you for two hours.

Would it really have hurt you so much just to say yes?

-If you want to discuss this, you need to do it via your solicitor.

-"Your solicitor," right.

Well, I'm going to make the same request next week.

And the week after that. And the week after that!

-Fine.

-OK, then.

ALARM

HE GASPS

-No, no, no!

-What were you doing?!

It's OK, I know what I'm doing.

COPD, that's another way of saying emphysema, right?

-OK, he's stable.

-This is totally unacceptable.

-She's right.

That alarm meant his oxygen levels had dropped, so I gave him some O2.

Did you even check his levels? You could have killed him.

Of course I checked his levels! My grandad had emphysema.

He had oxygen in his house. That thing was always going off.

Are you all right, mate?

I am not saying that you should've done that.

In fact, I am saying the exact opposite.

But...

that was a good call.

Have Infectious Diseases been down yet?

No, but would you like me to chase them up for you?

I need to find out what's wrong with my patient, so, yes, if it's not too much bother.

Hi there, it's Dr Tressler from AAU. I was wondering if...

Look, this is Mr Di Lucca. No, listen, I have a patient down here with a pustular rash

that's rapidly progressive. Now it may or may not be contagious,

so I need you to come down and take a look.

I spoke to you hours ago and I need to know urgently how best...

What? Well, can you put me through to the right person?

Just get them to hurry up.

-It's probably best that you don't go in there.

-Why, what is it? Is she OK?

We think Katherine has come into contact with a pathogen that may be contagious.

-What kind of pathogen?

-I'm just waiting for my colleague in Infectious Diseases to identify it.

Can I see it?

That's amazing. That's just amazing!

-It's cowpox.

-Cowpox?

-It's a form of vaccinia virus,

usually found in rodents and larger mammals, including elephants.

I treated one of the herd for it a couple of months ago.

I didn't even think of that. So I caught it off Winona?

It looks like it. Winona was a 14-year-old African elephant.

An elephant virus. Brilliant.

I'll have to warn the zoo to take samples from the rest of the herd.

I mean, we could have an outbreak.

In humans it's self-limiting.

You'll be fine.

-Who's Saint Veronica?

-No idea.

If this is the only alternative, I'd rather stay in my flat.

I don't want to be in a place full of new strangers,

especially those that just sit there and drool.

Mum, we're just exploring the options.

And there are other tests we can do to get a clearer picture.

From where I'm sitting, the picture's perfectly clear already.

You can keep Saint Veronica.

Well, you never know, it might be like living in a hotel.

-Really, Serena.

-You've always wanted to live in a hotel.

I always wanted to live in The Waldorf...

not Saint Veronica's bloody Residential Home.

-SHE SIGHS

-I'm not completely senile.

I know, I know, we don't say that word.

It's "dementia".

But not really...not when you're staring at it.

It's senility.

I'm becoming a senile old lady.

Serena, I'm too old and too tired to look at all the options.

You're the clever one.

Whatever you think is best.

What would the real Tom Jones do

if he couldn't perform in Vegas any more?

He once said he'd rather die on stage than retire.

-Well, for argument's sake?

-Look, love,

the real Tom Jones earns a bit more than I do.

He'd probably retire to his LA mansion and live happily ever after.

But you just said yourself that he wouldn't just retire.

Then he'd make a good living out of doing something like The Voice.

-Well, exactly.

-Exactly what?

Well, what does he do on The Voice?

He mentors young singers, you know, teaches 'em...

Ah-ha.

-Me, a mentor?

-Yeah, why not?

Yeah, I suppose...I could give a few classes,

teach the youngsters a few tricks of the trade.

She's a clever lass this one.

She has her moments.

# I saw the light on the night that I passed by her window

# I saw the flickering shadows of love on her blind... #

-I think you'd better stay here.

-Mr Tracy, can you stop that?

-# She was my women.... #

-Mr Tracy!

Mr Tracy, that's enough! Now stop it.

-# As she deceived me, I watched and went out of my mind. #

-Stop it!

-Oh, not another one. Come on, give it.

-Steady, raptor claws.

They're not for you...they're for Ms Teo.

-For me? Are you sure?

-Yeah, I don't know who they're from, they just turned up.

You must have a secret admirer.

You'd better make sure Raf doesn't find out.

They look good. Are they for us?

Who's the grateful patient?

-I bought them.

-You bought them?

-Yeah.

-For yourself?

No...for someone else.

-For who?

-You see, not all of your species are natural romantics.

Some of your lot need a little help.

Mr Matthews?

I got these for you to give to Katharine after her operation.

Well, that's very kind, but...why?

Cos humans like chocolate.

-That was very sweet.

-Thank you.

-Pleasure.

-What the hell do you think...?

-Well played, well played.

Guess I need to up my game.

Wish me luck.

-Tobes?

-I need to tell you something.

It's OK, I know the chocs weren't from you.

I heard you and the lady talking outside.

No, it's not about that.

It's about Bobo.

Well, you know how the staff at the zoo all call me Dr Doolittle?

I mean, I didn't know you knew they called you that, but, yeah.

I was talking to Bobo.

-What about?

-You.

-Oh.

-The thing is, I think the reason Bobo attacked you

was maybe because she was a bit jealous.

I mentioned to her that I was thinking of...

of asking you out.

Today. I was going to do it today.

Don't mind me.

SHE LAUGHS

Wait, let me get this straight,

so you think that Bobo attacked me because she was jealous?

I can't think of any other reason.

Because she's an animal who doesn't know her own strength?

Well, I suppose that does make more sense.

Katherine, we're ready for you now.

There are a couple of things you can do for me.

Of course.

Check to see where my parents have got to?

-I'll call 'em.

-And...and give me a kiss for luck.

Look, I'm going to need you on stand-by, just in case we have any problems with her meds.

-Stop worrying.

-Get used to it.

Oh, Doctor Tressler, I won't need you for this one. Stand down.

Raf?

-What is it?

-I know it's none of my business.

What?

Mr Di Lucca, don't you think it's time

you let up a bit on Dr Tressler?

I know you have a problem with him.

He's made some mistakes.

We've all made...mistakes.

My professional opinion of Dr Tressler is none of your business.

From where I'm standing, it looks like a personal vendetta.

That's not like you.

You need to be a role model.

A good role model would recognise the importance of giving someone a second chance.

Yeah, and what if he leads and makes a mistake?

You'll correct him and explain where he went wrong.

Dr Tressler, scrub in. I'd like you to lead on this one.

SHE SIGHS

Well, what do you reckon? How do I look?

It's not...not too much, is it?

Hm.

I think...you just need a bit of...

Come on.

-What you doing?

-Stand still!

Hello, stranger. Nice dress.

Not bad, huh.

-So what you been up to today? Skiving?

-Actually, she's just put in a very good shift.

She's got the makings of a fine nurse.

Aw, thanks, Jonny.

Believe that when I see it.

Well, Cinderella, your wish may have come true.

We're going to be working together.

No. No, no, no, no.

-Ah, you're kidding me?!

-Hm.

Well, you better hurry up, you don't want to be late for your ball.

And don't punch any paparazzi.

She didn't even ask how you were.

Yeah, well, she's had a lot of other stuff on her mind.

You all right?

-HE LAUGHS

-Tickety-boo.

I'm going to a karaoke bar with some of my mates.

Bit of sushi, some beer, belt out some Tom Jones tunes. Fancy it?

-Well, I'll come for a beer.

-Ah, good.

I need someone to duet with on Baby, It's Cold Outside.

Yeah, well, I didn't say anything about singing.

Jonny Maconie, you are so singing. HE LAUGHS

You know...you'll be all right.

Wherever you move to, I'll come and visit.

-You try and stop me, eh?

-Get well soon, dear.

-Are you driving me back to my flat?

-Yeah.

And I thought we could just drive past this Saint Veronica place

on the way just to take a look?

What Saint Veronica place?

Forget it. Come on, I'm taking you straight back home

and maybe we can pick up some of your things?

-But where would I go?

-Well...you could always move in with me?

I mean, since Ellie left it's been pretty empty.

-You'd be doing me a favour, really.

-Just till Roger fixes my bathroom?

Well, that's up to you, Mum, but the offer's there.

I suppose...if it would be a help to you.

I don't want to be a burden.

I know, Mum. I know. Come on, come on.

I...I don't suppose you remember where you put your suitcase?

THEY LAUGH

-Well, shall we book a trip to Copenhagen, check out the hospital, have a look around?

-Amy!

It's just a weekend trip, Raf. You might really like it.

We're not moving to Denmark or anywhere else come to that.

-There's nothing to stop me giving birth over there.

-Oh, yes, there is.

Me. We are not putting our baby at any risk.

Imagine all the upheaval and stress.

No chance I'm putting you through that.

What kind of a father would that make me?

We're staying right here.

Raf! Mr Di Lucca!

Sorry, just wondered if I could have a quick word?

Sure. What's up?

Well, I just wanted to say a big thank you for giving me a shot today.

No problem. It was faultless.

Look, I know me and you don't always see eye-to-eye,

but, well, I'm trying to decide what to specialise in

and I was just wondering whether you could help me think through my options.

Yes, I could do that.

Great, thank you. Thanks very much.

-Well, have a good night.

-You too.

Good night, Amy.