Bilingual Bank Job Made in Wales
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Transcript
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|---|---|---|---|
-All right, mate? -Dodo! You scared the life out of me. | 0:00:21 | 0:00:24 | |
Sorry, man, but I'm really excited! | 0:00:24 | 0:00:27 | |
Now, put down the horse. | 0:00:27 | 0:00:29 | |
Calm down, Dodo, they're not even real guns. | 0:00:29 | 0:00:32 | |
It's not even a real horse! | 0:00:32 | 0:00:34 | |
What did I tell you about behaving yourself today? | 0:00:34 | 0:00:36 | |
Sorry, man, but I'm really excited! | 0:00:36 | 0:00:38 | |
Today's the day. Woo-hoo! | 0:00:38 | 0:00:40 | |
Yeah, I know it is, so zip this, | 0:00:40 | 0:00:43 | |
get your costume on and let's get this show on the road, yeah? | 0:00:43 | 0:00:46 | |
Pow! | 0:00:46 | 0:00:47 | |
What the hell are these? | 0:00:51 | 0:00:53 | |
These aren't cool or sexy. | 0:00:54 | 0:00:56 | |
These aren't going to do anything for my image. | 0:00:56 | 0:00:59 | |
Dodo, we're going there to pinch their money, | 0:00:59 | 0:01:01 | |
not to make a fashion statement. | 0:01:01 | 0:01:04 | |
GATE SQUEAKS | 0:01:04 | 0:01:06 | |
Are you expecting anyone? | 0:01:08 | 0:01:10 | |
I think it's Eleri. | 0:01:10 | 0:01:12 | |
-Daddy! -Hiya, boy! | 0:01:18 | 0:01:20 | |
Shwd wyt it? What are you doing here? | 0:01:20 | 0:01:23 | |
-And why aren't you in school? -Don't start. | 0:01:23 | 0:01:26 | |
I've been up the school and it's closed. It was an inset day. | 0:01:26 | 0:01:30 | |
-I forgot. -Insect day? | 0:01:30 | 0:01:32 | |
What? You have a special day in school especially for insects? | 0:01:32 | 0:01:36 | |
I've got a tarantula at home. You can borrow it if you like! | 0:01:36 | 0:01:38 | |
You can do better than that, Dodo. | 0:01:38 | 0:01:40 | |
And this is the role model you have for our son, is it? | 0:01:40 | 0:01:43 | |
Why are you here, Eleri? | 0:01:43 | 0:01:45 | |
I'm due a spray tan in ten, hairdresser's in an hour | 0:01:45 | 0:01:48 | |
and my nails straight after. | 0:01:48 | 0:01:49 | |
I'll pick him up later when I'm done. | 0:01:49 | 0:01:51 | |
If only we had bullets. Pow! | 0:01:52 | 0:01:54 | |
Right, it's nearly time. | 0:02:00 | 0:02:02 | |
What's the golden rule for today? | 0:02:02 | 0:02:05 | |
You're not Daddy, he's not Dodo and I'm not Dylan. | 0:02:07 | 0:02:11 | |
Ah, very good. Well done, bach. | 0:02:11 | 0:02:14 | |
So at no point are you to refer to me as Daddy, | 0:02:14 | 0:02:17 | |
or to him as Dodo. You got it? | 0:02:17 | 0:02:20 | |
BOTH: Yes, Daddy. | 0:02:21 | 0:02:23 | |
METALLIC CHINK | 0:02:26 | 0:02:27 | |
CLOWN CAR HORN | 0:02:27 | 0:02:29 | |
THEY SHOUT | 0:02:31 | 0:02:33 | |
Right! | 0:02:38 | 0:02:40 | |
Everybody stay calm. | 0:02:40 | 0:02:42 | |
We've come to collect the money. | 0:02:42 | 0:02:44 | |
This will all be over a lot quicker if everyone behaves. | 0:02:44 | 0:02:48 | |
No silly buggers, no messing around and nobody gets wasted. | 0:02:48 | 0:02:53 | |
-TANNOY: -'Cashier number one, please.' | 0:02:55 | 0:02:58 | |
-Hello. -Hello. -Could you put all the money in a bag, please? | 0:03:02 | 0:03:06 | |
Cymraeg yn unig, os gwelwch yn dda. | 0:03:06 | 0:03:08 | |
TRANSLATION: Cashiers. Welsh Only. | 0:03:09 | 0:03:12 | |
Wyt ti'n jocan? | 0:03:12 | 0:03:14 | |
Oi! Fi moyn e'n Gymraeg hefyd. | 0:03:14 | 0:03:16 | |
A fi! | 0:03:16 | 0:03:17 | |
-A ti, Mair? -Aye. | 0:03:17 | 0:03:19 | |
-Shwd mae pethau 'da ti? -Very good, t'wel. | 0:03:19 | 0:03:23 | |
-Shwd mae Gerald gyda it dyddiau hyn? -Wel, ti'n gwybod, mae'n ol reit. | 0:03:23 | 0:03:26 | |
Ti'n gwybod y tabledi na ges di gan Dodgy Dave? | 0:03:26 | 0:03:29 | |
Ody nhw 'di gweithio? | 0:03:29 | 0:03:31 | |
Wonderful. | 0:03:33 | 0:03:34 | |
Eurgh! Excuse me, ladies. | 0:03:34 | 0:03:37 | |
I don't know if you've realised, but I'm in the middle of something here. | 0:03:37 | 0:03:41 | |
Before I continue, with a show of hands, | 0:03:41 | 0:03:45 | |
who would prefer this in Welsh? | 0:03:45 | 0:03:48 | |
-I think that's everyone. -I don't speak Welsh! | 0:03:51 | 0:03:54 | |
BELL STRIKES TWICE | 0:03:55 | 0:03:57 | |
What is that? | 0:04:05 | 0:04:08 | |
-Where are you from then, byt? -I'm from Dudley. -Where's that, mate? | 0:04:11 | 0:04:15 | |
-Just by Birmingham. -That's nice. | 0:04:15 | 0:04:18 | |
Sais ydy o. | 0:04:18 | 0:04:20 | |
Put your hands up, English boy! | 0:04:20 | 0:04:22 | |
Clown, get on the table and cover him. | 0:04:22 | 0:04:25 | |
CLOWN CAR HORN | 0:04:25 | 0:04:28 | |
Right! | 0:04:30 | 0:04:32 | |
In the interest of getting out of here as quickly as possible, | 0:04:33 | 0:04:37 | |
we're going to do this both in the Welsh and in the English. OK? | 0:04:37 | 0:04:42 | |
-Beth sy'n mynd ymlaen, Mair? -Oh, bilingual bank job, Ifor. | 0:04:42 | 0:04:46 | |
Mae Trefor yma yn mynd i roi gyd o'r arian mewn y sach. | 0:04:47 | 0:04:52 | |
A wedyn byddwn ni mas o fan hyn mewn pum munud. | 0:04:52 | 0:04:57 | |
CASHIER SCREAMS | 0:04:59 | 0:05:01 | |
Yeah! Trevor over there is going to put the loot in the bag. | 0:05:01 | 0:05:06 | |
-So I don't want any more trouble from you, lady! Nor you, Maureen. -Mair. | 0:05:06 | 0:05:10 | |
Oh, really?! And especially not from you, Ifor. | 0:05:10 | 0:05:14 | |
It's going to be all kicking off. | 0:05:15 | 0:05:19 | |
Mae ganddon ni drylliau. | 0:05:19 | 0:05:22 | |
Ni ddim eisiau defnyddio nhw ond... | 0:05:22 | 0:05:24 | |
..fyddwn ni os mae raid. | 0:05:26 | 0:05:28 | |
-We've got guns, guns with bullets in them. -Ooh! | 0:05:28 | 0:05:30 | |
T'isio cac, Ifor? | 0:05:30 | 0:05:33 | |
CONTINUOUS LAUGH | 0:05:33 | 0:05:35 | |
What are you laughing at? | 0:05:38 | 0:05:40 | |
She said cack! | 0:05:40 | 0:05:41 | |
-You're really winding me up. -I haven't done anything. | 0:05:44 | 0:05:46 | |
Shut up, grass, you're upsetting me and you don't want to see me upset. | 0:05:46 | 0:05:50 | |
-Don't you mean angry? -What do you mean? -You're the Hulk. | 0:05:50 | 0:05:53 | |
You don't get upset, you get angry. | 0:05:53 | 0:05:56 | |
What you should have said was... | 0:05:57 | 0:05:58 | |
HE GROWLS | 0:05:58 | 0:06:01 | |
"You won't like me when I'm angry." | 0:06:03 | 0:06:06 | |
I'm not the Hulk, I'm Frankenstein. | 0:06:09 | 0:06:11 | |
Really? Are you sure? | 0:06:11 | 0:06:13 | |
-You really look like the Hulk. -Am I the Hulk? | 0:06:13 | 0:06:17 | |
Right, come on! Stop getting wound up by him. | 0:06:19 | 0:06:21 | |
We've got to get out of here. Come on! | 0:06:23 | 0:06:25 | |
See, you're upsetting him now too. | 0:06:27 | 0:06:29 | |
Everybody freeze! This is a robbery! | 0:06:31 | 0:06:33 | |
All of you down on the ground now. | 0:06:33 | 0:06:36 | |
Unless you're a bit stiff then just stand still. | 0:06:36 | 0:06:38 | |
Sorry, guys, I didn't see you here. I'll come back tomorrow. | 0:06:38 | 0:06:43 | |
You could try the Post Office on Station Road, it's open until five. | 0:06:43 | 0:06:46 | |
Oh, right. Thank you very much. I'll give them a shot now. | 0:06:46 | 0:06:49 | |
Hey, thanks, guys. Oh, excellent outfits by the way. Cowboy, is it? | 0:06:49 | 0:06:53 | |
Clown, blind man and the Hulk. Genius. | 0:06:54 | 0:06:58 | |
-Frankenstein, apparently. -Oh, right. | 0:06:58 | 0:07:02 | |
Well, all I got was these tights | 0:07:02 | 0:07:03 | |
and me mam wore these line dancing last night. | 0:07:03 | 0:07:06 | |
I tell you what, it smells a bit like Deep Heat and chutney in here. | 0:07:06 | 0:07:10 | |
-I'll leave you to it. All the best, guys. -See, he had real bullets. | 0:07:10 | 0:07:14 | |
It's not a real gun, it's a fancy water pistol. Watch. | 0:07:14 | 0:07:17 | |
-That's nice. You stay with us. -OK, myn. | 0:07:21 | 0:07:25 | |
But I can't stay long, the Post Office closes at four. | 0:07:25 | 0:07:28 | |
-BOTH: -Five! | 0:07:28 | 0:07:30 | |
Right, that's it! | 0:07:30 | 0:07:32 | |
You're all getting locked in the back room. | 0:07:32 | 0:07:35 | |
-Open that door for me, clown. -Yes, Daddy. | 0:07:36 | 0:07:38 | |
Did he just call you Daddy? | 0:07:38 | 0:07:40 | |
-No. -Yes, he did, he did call you Daddy. -He didn't. | 0:07:40 | 0:07:43 | |
-He did, we all heard him. -No, of course not. He's not my son. | 0:07:43 | 0:07:46 | |
-He's my cousin, my midget cousin from Tenby. -Are you a midget? | 0:07:48 | 0:07:52 | |
-Are you from Tenby? -Don't talk to him. -Why? Why can't we talk to him? | 0:07:52 | 0:07:56 | |
-I've never met one before. -I've never been to Tenby. | 0:07:56 | 0:07:58 | |
-Is it true they can't eat cheese? -That's vegan, myn. -I'm a vegan. | 0:07:58 | 0:08:02 | |
I knew it! Aaaargh! | 0:08:03 | 0:08:05 | |
Catch the midget! | 0:08:07 | 0:08:09 | |
-I'm out of here. -HE SCREAMS | 0:08:11 | 0:08:14 | |
Run, Dylan! Run, Dylan! | 0:08:15 | 0:08:17 | |
Run, Dylan! | 0:08:17 | 0:08:19 | |
Leave my kid. | 0:08:19 | 0:08:20 | |
No! Run, Dylan. | 0:08:20 | 0:08:22 | |
EXCITED SHOUTING | 0:08:22 | 0:08:25 | |
No mortgage for you, mate, I'll tell you that for starters. | 0:08:27 | 0:08:30 | |
I'll give you trainers! Your dad will get you trainers. | 0:08:32 | 0:08:35 | |
No. You can do it, Dylan. I believe in you. | 0:08:36 | 0:08:39 | |
Use the power! Yes! | 0:08:40 | 0:08:42 | |
Yes, you can play for Wales. | 0:08:42 | 0:08:44 | |
Aaarrgh! | 0:08:44 | 0:08:46 | |
Run, Dylan. Side step. | 0:08:48 | 0:08:51 | |
-Dylan! -What the hell is going on here? | 0:08:56 | 0:08:59 | |
-Hi, Mam! -Come on, Dylan. | 0:09:04 | 0:09:07 | |
I can't leave him alone with you two for five minutes, can I? | 0:09:08 | 0:09:11 | |
Well, thanks for your... | 0:09:19 | 0:09:22 | |
..time and cooperation. | 0:09:23 | 0:09:25 | |
We won't be needing your assistance any further but, erm... | 0:09:28 | 0:09:30 | |
..we're going to be taking our business elsewhere! | 0:09:32 | 0:09:35 | |
TANNOY: 'Cashier number two, please.' | 0:09:44 | 0:09:46 | |
Oh! | 0:09:46 | 0:09:48 | |
Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd | 0:09:57 | 0:09:59 |