Episode 3 Red Rock

-I know you and your ma don't exactly see eye-to-eye.

-You think?

'Find out who the witness is.'

I know I'd do anything at all to protect one of my children.

'The girl was under age!'

Report McGonigle and you may as well hand in your resignation,

because no-one's going to thank you for ratting on a colleague.

-Sean, get up!

-Come here.

All this fighting and feuding,

it stops now.

MOBILE RINGS

Hello.

SIGN FLICKERS AND BUZZES

What do you think?

Bit small, isn't it?

Forget the size. See how bright she shines!

BUZZING AND CRACKLING

CRACKLING

HE CLEARS HIS THROAT

No, get off me!

-Calm down.

-Just let me go, all right!

-I will, all right. Get down!

Down. Stay down, you hear? Stay down!

-OK?

-This is assault! This is assault!

Stop fighting and we'll let you off.

You ready? One, two, three!

-I know me rights!

-You do, all right.

-You open this door! I didn't do it, you know I didn't!

-What's he done this time?

Let me out, you eejit!

I told him we wanted to interview him about a spate of burglaries

with his MO all over them... He threw a steam iron at me!

-Let me out!

-Oh!

-Yeah... Luckily, it was still plugged in.

-Open this bloody door now!

-You'll need a solicitor.

-Yeah.

-I'm telling you!

-We'll need a search warrant...

..to search his gaff!

You were right to protest, Paudge.

You call setting a flock of hens loose on the motorway a protest?

"Animal liberation", clue's in the title.

It's a farm, for Pete's sake. That's where chickens belong.

It was a warehouse with a carpet of crap calling itself a farm.

I can still smell the little beggars on me.

SPRAY HISSES, SHE COUGHS

What is that?

"Aqua Reef - High Endurance." Came in a hamper Mammy won at the bingo.

I hear you have a bone to pick with me, Garda Cleere?

No, I don't think so.

Well, it won't happen again, I swear. Cross my heart.

What's this?

I'm behind in me coffee subs.

We're all straight now, huh?

I can help myself without getting lynched, can I?

Do you dance?

Not if I can help it, no.

Dance with me, please, come on.

I can't, I have two left feet.

-Dance with me.

-I really can't.

SHE HUMS A MELODY

-Just one dance. Just one.

-No.

I'm not dancing.

KNOCKING

< Let me out! Let me out! I'm only doing my job.

-Seven grand for digging a hole in the ground!

-Calm down, will you?

I suppose Darren did deserve the best.

If it wasn't for the Hennessys, there wouldn't be a funeral.

They should be footing that bill.

Mr Crowley, it's me, Katie. You called me?

-< Please, let me out!

-What?

-Seven grand?

-< It's a reasonable price!

-It's our door you're wrecking.

-I don't care.

That parasite deserves everything he's got coming to him.

-He's just doing his job.

-No, he's using Darren's death to rip us off.

-Preying on our tragedy.

-It's sneaky and it's wrong, that is.

-The funeral was nice though, wasn't it?

-That's not the point.

It was what Darren deserved.

It's not Mr Crowley's fault Darren was killed.

Come on, let him out of the pantry. KNOCKING AND SHOUTING

OK.

I'll give you four grand and not a cent more.

< Please let me out!

# She was a fishmonger

# And sure it was no wonder

# For so were her father and mother before... #

-OK. That's enough. I've got work to do.

-No.

No! No, you can't go!

-We did suggest an economy range!

-Economy range?

What, throw him in the Liffey?

We'll get you your money, Mr Crowley, I promise you. I'm sorry.

Haven't you got a life in Costa Del Somewhere

you need to be getting back to?

-I can't leave now, not while me family need me.

-Funny that!

Cos I thought that leaving when your family needs you

is exactly what you do.

You're not the only one in the family, K.

We all get a say.

I want Ma to stay.

What about you, Da?

Yeah, Vinnie. What about you?

Look, I'm not doing this out here

with the world and its wife watching.

Can you confirm your name is...

Raymond O'Neill?

No comment.

-But you're known to most people as Blue Ray...

-No comment.

..because of your reputation for nicking and selling DVD players

and other electronic items?

No comment.

But you do have 78 convictions for burglary, shop theft,

possession of stolen goods, selling stolen goods...

Exposing yourself in a public park...

That was mistaken identity, you know that!

That was thrown out of court...

HE SIGHS

-No comment.

-My mistake.

Now, as you know, we have brought you in here today

to assist us in our investigation

into a series of burglaries, shop thefts.

Perhaps you can enlighten us as to your whereabouts

-on the evenings of September 10th last?

-No comment.

-October 15th?

-No comment.

-October 29th?

-No comment!

-December 8th?

-No...

INDISTINCT WHISPERING

HE SNIGGERS

We were just dancing, that's all.

What's your name, sweetheart?

Ailis.

I didn't mean nothing.

She wouldn't leave me alone. It's not funny.

Big strapping lad like you can't handle the older ladies?

She seems confused.

One too many?

She's hardly touched her drink.

I think she might have something wrong with her. In the head.

That's your expert medical opinion, is it(?)

Look, I've seen it before, all right? We should take her home.

PAUDGE SIGHS

That's your...

-address book, is it?

-No!

Ow!

All right! All right!

How about we go down the station?

-SHE TAPS WINDOW

-Stop your fussing.

How do we know that this won't go on the blink again?

If this happens tomorrow...

Patricia Hennessey is the landlord, that's what we pay her for.

It might be better coming from you.

-You didn't rat her son in to the police, did you?

-So?

What, you think this is all a coincidence?

No way, she couldn't do enough for us before I gave my statement.

But now... She doesn't want to know.

I just...

think it's best if I keep my distance for now.

Go on.

Look what she did to my hand!

I need more than just an Ailis out of her,

I need an address or a name of a relative.

You're wasting your time. She's tanked, that one.

-Maybe we should talk to the boss.

-No way.

Well, what do you suggest, then?

Bin her off onto Social Services.

We're not binning her off on anyone! She needs our help.

She needs a nice quiet room with padded walls.

And we're not going to McKay either, so you can forget that. We're not.

-You've checked Missing Persons?

-Nothing so far.

It doesn't help that we only have her first name.

You need to get an address.

-What's in the book?

-You'd think it was the Third Secret Of Fatima,

the way she's clinging on to it.

Mind if I borrow this?

Now, Ailis, the boss making you tea!

We're treating you like royalty today, Ailis.

Two sugars, just the way you like it.

You drink that up and I'll take that for you.

I can't lose it. My words...

I have to keep them with me.

Don't worry.

She will take care of that for you.

That's her.

This is me.

There isn't a barge pole long enough.

-Even if I wanted it.

-So, tell her to go.

She's Darren's mother.

She's bad news. Have you forgotten what she did to you?

HE SIGHS

BANGING

Thought I'd make myself useful.

I'm out of here.

She'll be gone by the time I get back, yeah?

-HE GROANS

-Katie!

-That's nice from my own daughter(!)

-She was ten years old when you left.

What did you expect?

Bunting and a welcome home party?

I'm not here to cause trouble.

I just want to be with me family.

Happy days.

MOBILE RINGS

I'm going to get a paper.

Vinnie!

RINGING STOPS

Let her finish her tea and then go check out that address,

-see if it jogs her memory.

-Yes, sir.

-And talk to the neighbours.

Someone might recognise her.

-Will do.

-Let me know how you get on.

Where's the crime?

-What?

-If being a bit doolally isn't an offence, there's no crime.

So, I don't know what we're doing getting involved.

Raymond's alibi for the 8th December stands up.

He was cleaning seafronts as part of his community service.

It doesn't mean he didn't do the other robberies.

They all look like they have the same MO.

OK, let's just wait and see what the search of his apartment shows up

before we release him, OK?

You can't punish Niamh for going to the guards.

Is that all you came for?

It wasn't her fault.

She saw what she saw.

You think I'm sabotaging your little cafe?

You know me better than that, surely.

I think you're good at hiding things.

-Getting what you want.

-Isn't that what you like?

-I mean it. I need it sorted.

-Yes.

-Yes, you'll have an electrician by the end of today?

-Yes.

I take it Friday's still on?

You'll be home soon, Ailis. We'll get you settled.

No, I can't.

Look, I'm in work.

You can't just turn up, OK?

OK.

HE CLICKS FINGERS

Ailis? Hold on.

DOOR OPENS

DOOR CLOSES

Oh, you couldn't give us a hand? I don't know what's up with me.

Don't be shy.

Nothing you haven't seen before.

Always liked the black, didn't you?

-Ever wondered, what if we'd stayed together?

-No.

Have a drink with us?

I'm going to study the form and pick me some winners.

You used to always let me pick your horses. Come on, Vinnie.

Have a drink with us.

You never know, you might get lucky.

-DOOR CLOSES We're not open yet.

-I know, yeah.

I just thought I'd come and tell you today's your lucky day.

-Oh, yeah?

-I can cook, clean...

I thought you'd be kept busy enough at the pub.

She sacked me cos her son murdered my brother.

I'm sorry. I can't help you.

What? Can't trust a Kiely?

Niamh's put her neck on the line for your family,

and we rent this place off Patricia Hennessy,

so don't pull that with me, OK?

HE BANGS BUTTONS

I can show you how to work that, if you like?

For a price.

You haven't got a key, have you, Ailis?

It's getting a bit chilly out.

There.

Cyclamen persicum.

I was no good with plants myself.

Dandelions and daisies, that's about it.

You didn't think to ask her for a key?

I reckon you could squeeze in there if I gave you a leg up.

You're joking, right?

Put all that dieting to good use.

It's not a diet, it's a healthy-eating regime.

Is it a key you're after?

Here, you owe me an apology, pal.

Me, Mr Blue Ray.

Admit it. CHAIN RATTLES

You got it wrong, huh? It wasn't me.

No comment.

COINS JINGLE

Keep the change.

-I take it the search turned nothing up?

-No, I'm sure it was him.

Now, all I've got is half a dozen unsolved burglaries

and not a thing to go on.

It's there.

Yes, I've found it.

You're here.

You're a dark horse, huh?

Paudge.

Whoa, lads...!

Looks like we're about to clear up half our outstanding burglaries.

I'll call the ranch.

You keep an eye on her, will you?

REGISTER BEEPS Hey!

-Just don't lose that entry code now.

-I won't, thanks.

OK.

Thanks for your help.

That's not even minimum wage.

(Jesus.) This much, I expect a warranty.

Hire me and I'll throw in the register maintenance for free.

I can't help you. I'm sorry.

Probably wise.

Don't want to upset Patricia Hennessy, do we?

Who's that, Ailis?

My boy. My beautiful boy.

Sharon!

We need to get out of here fast.

-Why?

-This isn't her house.

-It is.

You live in a home.

You didn't think to mention it?

They called the station, we need to get her back.

-You didn't check the address, did you?

-Look, nor did you.

-The key was...

-Lucky guess.

-No, that's her son.

-Who's my son?

Technically, we've broken in. If we get caught, we're for the high jump.

Come on, love, we need to go back to the station.

-What about all the gear?

-Sharon!

Let's pick a decent horse, will we?

You're never going to forgive me, are you?

I made a mistake.

Huh, and don't I know it!

I walked in on one of your mistakes - you and him on my bed.

-And I've regretted it ever since.

-Hmm.

I'm not perfect, I never claim to be.

You're telling me you never strayed?

No.

Never.

Not once.

Look...

Can we put it behind us?

Forget that it ever happened?

We can, can't we?

What made you think going in there was a good idea?

We thought it was her house, Sarge.

Based purely on the fact she'd found a key under the mat?

And Ailis recognised the guy in the photo. She said it was her son.

You took that from the house?!

No, Ailis did.

Go back there now and find that lad in the photo and bring him in.

-BOTH:

-Yes, Sarge.

And while you're at it, you'd better pray that it is her house.

Because if it's not,

you two have blown any chance of a conviction with your illegal entry.

Now!

Oh!

It's a toss up between Brandy Fall...

THEY LAUGH

..at Kempton, four o'clock.

Or a nice little filly at Uttoxeter,

-Three's A Crowd.

-Not in my experience!

THEY LAUGH

Here, say when.

Go on, go on, go on...!

THEY YELL

THEY LAUGH

Look what you made me do! Here!

BOTH GROAN

SHE GIGGLES

It's been a while since we've been this close.

What are you trying to do to me, here, Bridge?

Whatever you want.

Pick me a winner.

Vincent's Desire.

Used to be a bit of a stallion.

-Is that right? And where's he running?

-"Running"?

I don't think he can even get out of the stable these days,

it's been so long.

Not dead from the waist down after all.

HE SIGHS

LIGHTER CLICKS

Like you've died and gone to heaven, hm?

Go on, it's traditional.

Don't bother with that. You won't have the time.

Why is that, then?

You don't want to miss your flight, now, do you?

-He's definitely the son, you reckon?

-Well, the neighbour ID'd him.

Knew Ailis, too.

-There's thousands of euros' worth in there.

-What if he doesn't show?

Well, he'll turn up, all right.

We should've stayed with the mum, get a warrant, come back for him.

No. We need to get him now, cos if he finds out we've been

sniffing around, that whole lot will be cleared out.

-HORN BLARES

-Paudge!

-Oi! Oi!

It's about your ma.

-Ailis Scanlon.

-What about me ma?

We have her down the station.

This is my house, Vincent. I'm going nowhere.

Look, you made it for the funeral. I appreciate that.

-But there's nothing here for you now.

-Well, we just made love.

It was an itch that needed to be scratched.

She's on her way.

An itch?

I've just lost me son.

It's not nice, is it...

..being kicked in the teeth?

You ran off and left me the butt of everyone's jokes around here.

-I've changed.

-Too late! You can't just waltz back in here

and think you can pick up where you left off.

You heard him. Out you go.

-Right, where is she?

-We'd like a little word first.

-Has something happened to her?

-No, she's fine.

-Now. I want to see her.

I want to see me ma NOW.

BEEPING, BUZZER BLARES

You OK, Ma?

You trying to escape again?

Brendan and Danny send their love.

I know you, don't I?

Couldn't forget this face!

Yeah. I remember you.

Mikey's eldest. Jimmy.

-OK, Robbie, we really need to have that chat now.

-I'll be back.

-Twice in one day! Can't keep away.

-Just give me the number.

-I'll call him myself.

-I said I'd arrange it.

-You know what workmen are like.

-Don't take me for a fool, Patricia.

Whatever happened to gratitude?

I could get a lot more for that building than you're paying.

KNOCK AT DOOR

-Sorry. Didn't realise you had company.

-It's all right, Donal.

We're done here.

-You're early.

-There's something we need to discuss.

-Good something or bad something?

-Bad something.

That fella in the pub...he didn't touch her or anything, did he?

-That's...That's not what this is about.

-No, nothing like that.

-Your mother took us to your house.

-Yeah?

-She forgets she doesn't live there sometimes.

-I say "house" -

I suppose "warehouse" would be a better description.

-I'm not with you.

-All the gear you've got stored in there.

Your kitchen looks like a scene of a crime.

We've checked serial numbers, got photographic evidence.

-It's not mine.

-It's in your house!

Listen, I tried to bring it back,

but she just keeps nicking more and more.

-You saying your ma's been thieving?

-She doesn't know what she's doing.

And I can't stop her.

Yous can ask her yourself if you don't believe me.

RADIO PLAYS POP MUSIC IN BACKGROUND

Setback after setback. You'd almost think the gods have it in for us.

-Or one god, at least.

-I get it, Niamh.

-Good.

-I was worried I was being too subtle.

-Shouldn't you be baking?

I tried, but the power blew and I had to chuck everything. Setback.

Isn't there something else that needs doing?

What needs doing is you standing up against bullies.

I thought you knew how to work that.

-Where are you going?

-Striking a blow against bullies.

When I order and present your accounts, my name is on them...

my reputation.

So if you wanted me to manage the discrepancies, you need to...

Whoa, stop right there. What discrepancies?

-The money from the pub.

-What money?

There's thousands of euros missing from the books.

He's claiming Ailis stole the goods.

Thinks he can get off scot-free by blaming his doolally mammy.

A quick call to the home will prove she couldn't have done it.

They say she's got early-onset Alzheimer's.

-What time are they coming to pick her up?

-Soon as, they said.

Pass the case on to Sergeant McGonigle when you're done, OK?

-PHONE RINGS

-No problem.

-Hey, excuse me, guys.

-Sir.

What can I do for you, Patricia?

I've still got clothes in the machine.

Leave us a forwarding address - we'll send them on to you(!)

DOOR CLOSES

-I'm leaving, love.

-Why?

-We don't want her living under our roof.

Well, she can live under mine, under my part of it.

It's all right, love, I'll find somewhere else.

-No time like the present.

-Hey...

-Sorry. We're having a clear-out.

-You still want that job?

-In the cafe?

No, the one in Hollywood(!)

-Yeah, the cafe.

-What's the catch?

-Are you always this suspicious?

-Better that than sorry.

-The catch is you're in charge of that register.

-And you start today.

-I want at least 12 euro an hour.

This isn't a negotiation!

-All right, give me an hour.

-Great. See you later.

-What about Patricia Hennessy?

-What about her?

Ah, here she is.

You think you've won.

I will wipe that smile off your face, madam. You just watch me.

Yeah, send me a postcard from Spain, tell me all about it.

Yeah, sure, if you wouldn't mind checking that for me.

Four convictions for shoplifting, two for burglary. I knew it.

He had scrote written all over him.

Look, you shouldn't even be here.

His daughter, in case you're wondering.

You want us to walk home in the dark? We need taxi money.

-For what, basketball practice?

-Ask Rachel if you don't believe me.

Rachel, tell him.

HE SIGHS

-Yeah, OK, look, be back here in five.

-Yes, sorry, I'm still here.

I'll drive you myself, all right?

-Every time I solve a problem, two new ones arise.

-It's called life.

Your motivational talk could really use some work.

HE LAUGHS Well, how about this?

I've employed an extra pair of hands to help us out.

-Tell me he's six foot with a full gym membership.

-He is a she.

Now I'm hoping NOT six foot with a full gym membership.

It's...Katie Kiely.

-That's a joke, right?

-She's a really hard worker.

And she owes me a tenner.

She's a Kiely. Are you deliberately trying to wind Patricia up?

-You told me to stand up to her.

-I meant get the electricity sorted,

not throw petrol on the already very big fire!

-I think you're overreacting.

-You think this is overreacting?

Wait until Patricia Hennessy finds out.

The home say Ailis was there on the dates of all the robberies,

-so she couldn't have done them.

-I could've told you that.

I've seen some beauties in my time, but this,

trying to frame your own mother, who's senile, takes the gold medal.

And he knew we wouldn't have charged her. That's why he did it.

No excuse. How a man treats his mother tells you a lot about him.

-All I'm seeing is a toerag.

-What now?

Get a warrant to search the house properly?

Well, I reckon we've enough to charge.

Have you two solved half our outstanding burglaries in one go?

-Not as useless as you look!

-Cheers, Sarge! Where's Robbie now?

-In with Ailis.

-I think it's time we had a proper chat with him.

Danny?

M...

-M...

-Mairead. That's right.

She's the gobby one.

We've been in touch with Marigold House.

Are they coming to get her?

And we've been able to eliminate your mother from our inquiries.

Quite a CV you've got here.

You should pass it on to Bill Cullen when you get a chance.

And the four years suspended?

Something tells me you'll be getting reacquainted with prison food.

Yeah, not here. Not in front of me ma.

TV: CAR ENGINES ROAR

We're better off so. On our own.

Like always.

HE LAUGHS

You and me, we have a laugh, don't we?

My daughter's going to be a barrister.

Barista. I'm not even that, I'm just chopping and cleaning.

It's a start! A fresh start.

Dead proud, are you, Da?

-Ma!

-Sorry to interrupt. You couldn't give us some sugar, could you?

-Yeah.

Maureen's putting me up for a while.

I'm going to be your new next-door neighbour!

So, why did you risk it? Some skanky DVD players and knock-off runners?

I did it so she could be somewhere nice.

You don't have to pay for your mother's care.

-You can get that for free.

-Yeah.

If I want her rotting in some rancid old kip,

stuck in front of the telly all day.

She's 46. I wanted to give her somewhere nice with...

-..with a garden and fresh air.

-So you broke the law?

-Yeah.

And I'd do it again.

They won't spend every last penny on us...

..now she's got this thing... eating away at her brain.

She's got nothing.

And it's not her fault.

But you try and tell me you wouldn't do the same for your ma.

PHONE CHIMES

He's on his way, the fella from the home.

We'll be getting a warrant to search your premises,

-and we'll be charging you. You know what that means.

-Yeah.

Here. KEYS JANGLE

Save you kicking the door in.

This is nice, isn't it, me and you working as a team?

-Yeah, I thought I got a bad smell.

-Katie!

What part of "get lost" don't you understand?

Your mother's getting her stuff.

She must be slowing down in her old age, cos last time you left us

it took all of 15 minutes, just long enough for the taxi to arrive.

Don't you talk to me like that. I'm still your mother.

No. You're not.

-My mother is dead.

-Now, there's no need for that.

-It's OK. I'm going.

I will put manners on you, madam.

When are you going to ever learn?

You know I can't do anything about this.

-You're supposed to be a policeman.

-You're my mother-in-law.

-It's a conflict of interest.

-She's been stealing from my pub!

You can't go accusing people of things without evidence,

-especially not with what's going on with Michael.

-You want evidence?

Read it yourself.

The thefts stopped as soon as Katie Kiely was sacked. She's a thief.

And I want her arrested.

She wasn't always like this.

-Used to sing in halls.

-She was singing down the pier earlier.

Don't tell me. Molly feckin' Malone.

She's forgotten all her kids' names.

Still remembers every word of that bleedin' song.

When was she diagnosed?

A few years back. But she was like that for ages...forgetting things...

..disappearing.

A bit low, blaming her.

I'm the only one.

Five kids. Two brothers.

I'm the only one who bothers their ass to go and see her...

The only one who cares.

I'm all she's got.

And you might think it's low, but...

I'd do anything, say anything, to not go back inside.

In six months' time, she'll be gone.

There'll be nothing left of her by the time I get out.

And I'll never see her again.

CAR PULLS UP

If you've won the station sweepstakes again,

I'm demanding an investigation.

-Nothing like that. I had a bit of a result today.

-What?

Nabbed someone doing 45 in a 30 zone?

Actually, we managed to solve nine outstanding burglaries

-and shop thefts in one go.

-No way!

-And we recovered most of the gear. A very sweet haul.

-A good job, Paudge.

There's no way he pulled down nine burglaries.

-Professional envy's a very unattractive trait.

-It's a wind-up.

Ask the boss. He nearly wept tears of gratitude

when he saw the dent we'd knocked in the crime stats.

-DEFINITELY a wind-up.

-Go in and have a look.

-They're processing the little scrote we caught for it right now.

-Yeah.

-I will.

-I would like to tell you how I pulled it all off,

but I'm sure you'd rather wait

and read all about it in the Garda Review.

Oi! Get back here now! Get back!

'Unbelievable!'

Can you believe that? Half an hour. We were rid of her for half an hour.

-You need any help in the kitchen?

-No.

-Thanks for the job, by the way.

Don't thank me.

-It's just a trial. See how it goes.

-Sure, yeah.

What is this even meant to be?

I hope you know what you're doing.

Ma?

Ma!

I have to go, Ma.

I have to go.

I'll take that.

Cheers.

HE KISSES HER

# And they both wheel their barrow

# Through the streets broad and narrow

-BOTH:

-# Crying, "Cockles and mussels, alive, alive-o

# "Alive, alive-o

# "Alive, alive-o"

# Crying, "Cockles and mussels...

# "Alive, alive-o"... #

-I can still hold a tune.

-Yeah, you can.

Can we go back home, Robbie? Can we?

HE KISSES HER

# She died of a fever

-BOTH:

-# And no-one could save her

# And that was the end of sweet Molly Malone. #

HE SIGHS

Can I take her out?

Come on, Ma.

-Where's Paudge?

-We're not joined at the hip.

Listen, don't let that Scanlon fella get to you.

He deserves what's coming to him.

I should never have gone to that house.

Some things we'd be better off not knowing.

Nah, a crime's a crime. Can't go round making exceptions.

-Here comes trouble.

-HE GROANS

-I told you, wait in the car.

-I just need to go to the toilet.

I won't be a sec.

Unbelievable. Waste half their bloody lives in the jax.

Look, when I get back, I'll deal with him, OK?

Five minutes, I'm driving off without you.

This isn't like you, Niamh. Give the girl a chance, will you?

Her brother just died.

What the hell are you doing?

-It's not finished yet.

-Leave it alone. I've already done that.

What do you reckon?

It's good. I like it.

It's really good.

-Frothy coffee on the house, Garda?

-No, I'll pass, thanks.

Katie, do you mind if I have a word?

-What about?

-Not here.

Might be best if you come down to the station.

He means it. He'll drive off. You don't know my dad.

-Ah, he won't.

-You should get your dad to buy you a car.

-What?

-Well, you have a licence, don't you?

-You're joking. I'm not 17.

-What about you?

-Me? No, I'm only 15.