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-Drew, who did that to ye?
-Naebody! What's it to you?
What are you even daein' here?!
Nothing bad is going to happen.
But if it was, you wouldn't be able to stop it.
He's not only black and blue, he's skin and bone!
He's fading away.
I know I'm going to lose him bit by bit.
As long as I am able, I am going to fight tooth and nail.
-I love you.
-Then, why are you leaving me here?
Molly, Molly, it's me, Alasdair.
Yes, I'm sorry, Liz made me up a bed,
we were listening to Gilbert and Sullivan.
# I am the very model of a modern major-general... #
Oh, Liz, Liz!
# I've information, animal, vegetable and mineral... #
You're raving! Have you dunted yer heed?
It's a song from The Pirates of Penzance.
-What is going on out here?
-I caught this yin creeping aboot.
Oh, what's this now? It's two o'clock in the morning.
Elizabeth Hamilton speaking.
You didnae need to see me all the way to the front door.
It's all part of the service.
This the way you get tips off the old dears, aye?
Aye, I just flirt with the old dears. But don't you tell Scarlet.
-Oh, you've got to be kidding me.
Look, stay at our place tonight, we'll get this fixed the morra.
No way! Jimmy, all our stuff is in there, what have they done with it?
Look, I'm no' taking no for an answer!
Don't want to see a damsel in distress, eh?
-Eh, I'm no in distress, I'm fine.
-I know, I know.
-What you doing up?
-I just wanted to check my e-mail.
Why you still up?
I was watching a documentary on Britain's best unsolved murders,
pure gave me the heebies.
-Well, maybe it was worst.
-What you daein'?
-University offers are due.
I thought they would come through just after midnight, but...
there's nothing yet though. Must be the morning.
You'll get in.
Well, it's easy for you to say, I mean,
what if I don't get any offers at all?
You that desperate to get away fae us?
There are universities near here, you know.
You worried about me leaving?
LAUGHING SOFTLY: Naw.
Is your arm OK?
Right, I'm going back to bed.
Shh-shh-shh. HOPE CRIES
-What's going on?
-I didn't mean to upset her.
It's OK, Kelly. Just give her here, I can dae it.
-I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.
What are you daein' here? I didnae know you were staying...
-I know, I shouldnae be...
Just got confused and I heard a cry and...
-Oh, darling, come here.
-I just thought I would help...
Look, I'm sorry, I'm just going to go.
-MUFFLED CHILDREN'S VOICES
-Don't be daft. That's Madonna and Cal up now.
-Jimmy, gonnae see to them?
-Look, you really don't have to go.
Naw, really, I dae.
KELLY-MARIE SOBS QUIETLY
The girl just said that Malcolm had pneumonia,
and we should get there as a matter of urgency.
Should he not be in hospital if he has got pneumonia?
-Eileen, I'm so glad to see you.
Are you OK? I didn't expect to see you back here so soon.
Listen, we have to get going, Eileen.
I'm really sorry, I've just got nowhere else to go.
I couldnae get in to my flat, and I was staying at
-Scarlett and Jimmy's, but...
-Slow down - it's fine.
I hate to ask, but is it all right if I stay?
Listen, we are just on our way out, dear.
-It would just be one for night.
-Malcolm has taken a turn.
-We're just heading to the care home.
I'm sorry, I shouldnae have bothered you, I'll just go.
No, no, don't be daft, of course you can stay.
Molly's looking after Stuart, she'll keep you company.
-Listen, I can watch Stuart if you want.
Aye, it's the least I can dae.
Take over baby-sitting duties and let Molly get up the road.
-Oh, thank you. Here.
All right, Liz. I'll be back as soon as I can.
My concentration is good.
My energy levels are...
I have filled in today's questionnaire
and I submitted it online.
-What's going on?
-What? Nothing, nothing.
-Here, are you daein' webcam work.
You know, like...
-# I'm your private dancer... #
Come on, you've been weird all week, even Ellie's noticed it.
Now you're filming yourself in the middle of the night -
what's going on?
-I'm daein' a medical trial for some students at the uni.
No way, man, that's pure heavy.
Here, you wantae watch it, you don't
want your heed to end up swelling up like a pure...
No! It's no like that. It's a sleep deprivation study,
I've to stay up for five nights and dae a video diary each night.
-What's the point in that?
-I dunno, I'm just a participant.
Mate, you've been up all week for some students?
Just wrap it and get to your bed, you look awful!
Well, I've been up for three nights. It's just one mare night.
-After the night.
-You. Are. Mad.
He'll... He'll be better once we get him to hospital.
I suppose we should have expected something like this to happen.
-This place is a shambles.
He needs to be seen by a real medical professional.
He's being seen by a GP.
No, I, I'm talking a specialist at a hospital.
Then he'll be back to full strength in no time.
Liz, were you listening?
Whatever happens, my dad doesn't have much longer.
No, they said if he was taken into hospital
they would expect him to make a full recovery.
-From the pneumonia.
But if it is not that, it will be something else.
We really need to think about making him as comfortable as possible.
Oh, no, hospital is the best place for him.
Let's see how the antibiotics work.
Och, chances are they won't.
No, he needs to be moved to the hospital by the end of today.
-For a few extra months?
Liz... Liz, I know this is difficult, but...
..my dad hasn't been well for a long time,
and he's not going to get any better.
We need to consider...
..letting him go.
Out of the question!
I need to get home, I need to make arrangements for the pub.
Well, I'm going to wait here.
No, you come with me, we could both do with a rest.
I promise I will get us back here as soon as possible.
-I'll need to phone Gina.
Yeah, we will need to tell her what is going on.
MUSIC PLAYS ON LAPTOP
I'll get it!
I thought we were meeting at the Oyster.
Well, I didn't think you would want to carry
these around all day...Dr McLean.
Shh! I haven't found the right moment to tell...you know?
Here he comes, the human gift voucher, Mr Birthdays and Christmas.
What'd you mean?
-Only ever turns up for the good news.
-Wait a minute, Caitlin.
Mum, I was going to tell you, I just hadn't found the right moment.
-Is that right?
-So you got in, then?
Sorry, did I speak out of turn?
I was going to tell you, and Mum. They're only conditional offers.
What's the condition?
I need to get A's in my higher physics
-and my advanced higher biology.
-There is always conditions, Jenny,
you would be as well learning that the now.
Well, I'm going to need to work hard, I know that.
-That's no' what I mean. It's a trap.
-No, it's not.
I got an e-mail, and I double-checked
on the actual UCAS website.
University IS the trap.
What do you want to go to university for anyway?
You'll only end up working in a burger van.
Oh, come on, Caitlin, you're taking this all wrong.
It's all right for you, innit?
Glamorous Gary swanning in when all the heavy lifting's been done.
Because you're Mother of the Year, aren't you?
-What's that mean to mean?!
-Hardly textbook parenting, is it?
-Who do you think you are?!
-Gonnae just shut up, the both of yous!
-Let's get that coffee.
-I need to go and check if Drew is OK.
He'll be fine, he's got his mum.
Eileen thinks we should just let him die in that nursing home,
not even give him a chance to get better.
Oh, does she?
And she says it as if it is nothing, as if...
she's talking about some old car that's needing scrapped.
-I mean, how can she give up on her own father like that?
I know he may not be the same man that I married,
but he's still Malcolm.
What do you think Malcolm wants?
..completely unresponsive now, he's got no idea what's going on.
Yeah, but, I mean, you're his wife.
What do you think he would want done in this situation?
Well, I should think he would want what anyone would want,
to get better.
-Hey, wee man.
-Be a good boy for your grandad.
-I will, bye, Mummy.
Oh, does he not have a coat? Excuse me.
-I'm taking him to Montego Street, no Montego Bay.
-What is it?
Where's his coat?
-Am I going to have to call child services here?
There you go. Right, gie Granny a kiss.
-And be good.
-I will, bye.
-What's up with her?
Kylie Minogue, who do you think?
Lenny, she's just lost a baby.
-She'll be fine, I'll look after her.
-Somebody better. 'Mon, pal.
Hiya. Didnae hear you come in this morning.
-How's your dad?
-Och, you know...
You managed to find sheets and everything OK?
Aye, it was the best sleep I've had in ages actually.
-Thanks for looking after this one.
-So what did the care home say?
About your dad, is it anything serious?
No, no, it's nothing serious.
It's good to see you back, Stella.
And this wee one too.
I know, she has got the patience of a saint considering
everything that has happened.
-Must get that fae her daddy.
-Where is Stevie?
-He's going to come back for us.
He wouldnae leave Hope, Eileen.
He's no' just gonnae let us go.
Stella, you do realise, if he comes back to Shieldinch
-he'll be arrested?
Em, anyway, that must have been a right shock for you getting
-that news in the middle of the night.
-Honestly, I'm fine.
-Liz is the one I am more worried about.
-How, what's wrong with her?
Oh, she's in denial.
-Lenny Murdoch criticising how
-look after MY weans?
-Just don't let him get to you, eh?
-I'm no' letting him get to me!
-He's right but, int' he?
-Right about what?
She's getting worse, Jimmy. She drifts aboot the hoose like a ghost.
-I know, it's heartbreaking.
-It's Cal she's got to think about.
-What can we dae?
-Well, I think she needs to speak to somebody.
She'll barely leave the hoose to go to the shops!
Yes, yes, I see. Yes, I understand, thank you.
We'll be in shortly.
That was the home. Malcolm is not responding to the antibiotics.
So are you going to have him moved into the hospital, then?
-Well, that's our only option.
-That's terrible, isn't it?
Ohh...one minute you're 18, at the dancing, having a ball,
then the next, you're 82...in a hospital bed wi' tubes in you.
Oh, right. I was never much of a dancer.
I mainly went to the dancing for the fellas an aw!
You know what I mean? Oh, dear, where does the time go?
They said they were confident that they could
treat his pneumonia at the hospital.
-Well, that's good, isn't it?
How do you mean?
Well, once they have treated the pneumonia, then what happens?
Well, then he would return to the home.
If I was in his position, I'd just want to be left alane to go.
-It's me I'm talking about here.
-Aye, well, you're not Malcolm.
No, you're quite right, I'm not.
I'm just saying that... Oh...
-Oh, speak your mind, Molly, for goodness' sake.
we're ladies of a certain age.
-And we can easily imagine
being where poor Malcolm is now.
Ohh, I'm sorry, I didnae mean to upset you.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry...
You know, I...
I knew fine when we were married that we wouldn't
have each other long,
we were neither of us spring chickens, but...
..I didn't expect to lose him so soon.
But you've no' lost him yet.
He hasn't recognised me in months, Molly.
Oh, ya soul.
I can still see him.
I can hold his hand.
I know where he is.
If I let him go now, he'll be...
..Malcolm Hamilton will be gone for ever,
and I'll just be here on my own.
-But you're not on your own.
-You know what I mean.
I do, but I'm telling you, you are not alone. You've got me.
used to say...
.."When your time's up...
"..your time's up."
Hey. Well, did you get your offers through today?
Yes, I got conditionals to Glasgow and Dundee.
-That is brilliant, well done.
-You're not thrilled?
Oh, I am, and thank you for everything.
You are a clever, hard-working girl who gets everything she deserves.
-I am very proud of you.
-So am I.
Sorry, we've not met.
-Oh, this is Dr Jandhu.
Hi, I'm Gary, Jenny's dad.
-So you're Jenny's dad?
-That's right, proudest man in Shieldinch.
-Well, nice to meet you.
Now is where the hard work starts, Jenny.
It is not easy getting a medical degree, you're going to
work harder than you ever thought possible.
If I even get in.
-You have got this far, have a bit of faith in yourself.
Look, I need to get to work.
Why not take a day off from giving yourself a hard time?
The world will keep turning, even if you're not punishing yourself.
-Hiya. You no' answering your door now, no?
Was just on my way to work,
thought I would see how Jenny got on with her university offers.
Where is she, out celebrating with her pals?
What is there to celebrate?
-Did she no' get in?
-She got in.
I'm losing them all, Ellie.
Jenny's leaving and Drew's up the stairs worrying about
her leaving already.
He'll be straight out the door after her.
Look...they're getting to that age.
-They just want away from me.
-That is not true.
-Can you stay?
-Doll, I can't, I need to open up the pub.
-Malcolm's not well, so Eileen needs me.
-Fine, go to your work, then.
-Caitlin, Malcolm is in a really bad way.
-I'll be fine, on you go.
You are your own worst enemy, you need to start supporting those kids.
I do support those kids!
Jenny got into university!
You should be throwing a party for her,
no a wee pity party for yourself.
I'm going to give you one more chance. I'm going to count
to three, and if this bolt doesnae come off...
One, two, three...
-Haw, calm doon!
I warned it, Bob, I gave it one more chance, I'm no messing aboot here!
Angus, it's a motor, it cannae hear you!
What am I daein' with my life, Bob?
What are you daein' this stupid sleep study thing for anyway?
You're gonnae end up killing yourself, and for what?
I'm on the verge of a nervous breakdown here.
-For one measly grand, it's no even worth it.
Slow doon, slow doon.
-A grand? They're paying you a grand?
But...I feel like there's... bugs under my skin.
I'm seeing things, Bob, mental things.
-I saw a cartoon rat last night.
-Aye, but a grand's a grand.
-I just want to go to my bed.
-Ho, come on, hey.
Go and get us a couple of coffees or something, eh?
Cos I tell you what, you're no going to sleep now.
You're into the garage for the cost of a new exhaust,
so you'd better get that money, all right?
-Right, come on, go. Go on.
KNOCK ON DOOR
-I've had time to think.
We should dae something for your sister, I don't want that...
What are you doing?
It's nothing, it looks worse than it is.
What have you done?!
-Annie doesn't give out compliments easily.
I thought she seemed nice.
Well, she is nice, but she doesn't give out compliments easily.
Well, you deserve all the compliments going.
I'm so proud of you, Jenny.
What is it?
Mum and Drew think I'm abandoning them.
You're not abandoning anyone.
I know, but that's not how they see it.
-You need to put yourself first this once.
-Mum can't cope without me.
Jenny, you have got this all back to front.
-You don't know what it's like.
-I know you're not the mum.
We are not like other families, we are a team,
and it needs all of us to function.
Your mum raised you all right, didn't she?
I know I wasn't always there to help, but from where I'm sitting,
she did a great job.
So why can't she do the same for Drew and Ruby?
-I know I'm being a misery.
Can we just go back and check they're OK? I feel bad about before.
-Did you see...?
I'm fine, you're overreacting.
What's wrong with you? How could you do this to yourself?
Am I such a bad mother?
If you loved me, you wouldnae do this.
Caitlin, I think you should hear Jenny out.
-Are you OK, Drew?
Mum, can I go upstairs, please?
Maybe it would be best if just the three of us talked.
-Mind your own business.
-Nothing, he has just hurt his arm, that's all.
-How did he hurt his arm?
I don't know.
-Is that blood?
-What's wrong with you?
-What do you care?
You're desperate to get away fae us, aren't you?
-I'm not, I'm part of this family!
-Caitlin, what is going on?
You going to ride in on your white stallion and saved the day, aye?
-What is wrong with Drew?
He's hurting himself!
What do you mean, "He's hurting himself"?
-He's going to be fine.
-Liz...here are you are.
OK, I want you to listen to me, I've been thinking about this a lot.
-So have I.
-And I'm afraid I'm going to have to be very clear with you.
I do not think we should move my dad.
-Neither do I.
-What? What did you say?
Great, good, well, I'm glad you've seen sense.
A friend...helped me to realise that I was being selfish.
Oh...I think that's a bit strong.
Liz, I know this is difficult, but we will support each other.
That's what my dad would want. And we are all he has got now.
Why's my dad not in the hospital?
I know that I haven't been about as much because I have been
studying and everything, but I'll make sure I'm home more.
I'll be there for you.
Please, look at me, Drew.
You don't have to worry about me leaving you,
because I'm not going to.
I won't go to university, I just want you to be OK.
I don't want to hold you back.
You're not holding me back, you're my brother
and I want to be there for you.
I'll just drag you down with me.
-You need help.
-I need to be left alone.
-I'm going to call Dr Jandhu.
I'm sorry, Drew, but we need help.
Please, I'm serious, Jenny, I'll be fine.
-If you care about me you willnae dae this!
How could you have not told me how ill he is?
What did you think was happening with our 82-year-old father?
Did you think he was going to
-get a second wind?
-Yeah, well, I'm here now.
We're going to get him back on the road to recovery.
It's not that straightforward!
First things first, we will get him into hospital and get this
pneumonia dealt with, and then we will see about treating his mind.
Treating his mind?! I can't believe I am hearing this, are you joking?
There is always things online about new treatments,
we have to try everything.
It is too late!
Have you even investigated complementary therapies?
-Are you drunk?
I'm sorry, Liz, but she needs to hear this.
My dad has been getting worse and worse for months.
The last time he recognised me was over a year ago.
Now, I am sorry that you didn't get a chance to say goodbye,
but it's too late. He's gone already.
You are the one that wants to keep that body in there alive,
just to salve your guilty conscience.
Girls, please, this is not what Malcolm would want.
Sorry, Liz, my wee sister has always thrown her weight about like this.
I'm not going to let you do this.
-It's not my fault that you let him down at the end.
-How can you say that?!
And how can you think that me and Liz don't know what's best for him?
-We have to let him go.
-You're not in charge!
Oh, will you please be quiet?
-Show a little respect.
I'm going in there... to check on him.
And I expect to see you two behaving like civilised beings
when I come out.
Look, it goes right from there way along to there.
I mean, you do know who your Auntie Amber is, don't you?
She's your daddy's sister. I'm fixing all this house up
cos she's coming home soon,
and we are going to stay in this house together, me and her.
Oh, and you, of course.
You'll have your own room, you can stay whenever you want.
You'll like that, eh?
You'd like that, Cal, eh?
-Hey, wee man, how you doing?
How's the books doing?
Getting there. Diluting them day by day.
Can't just press a button
and erase all signs that my mother ever existed, you know?
-It's a process.
-Well, as long as the process is in process.
So, this is it, then, eh?
Casa del Lenny.
The Ponde-Murdoch. Awful big house just for you.
Just as well I'm no' going to be staying on my own, then.
You seem pretty sure that
Amber's gonnae want to come back and play happy families.
-What's that got to do with you?
Nothing, exactly, so mind your own business.
Oh, be careful! They're Italian.
Cost more than a week of his wages.
Well, pleasure catching up with you, as always.
Hey, hey, what is it, you no' speak the English?
They tiles, in there!
You be a good boy for your mummy, OK?
So, look, I've been thinking, I should be your coach.
I should train you through your last night. It's the least I could dae.
I'll be...Amelie Mauresmo to your Andy Murray.
COFFEE CUP THUDS AND BOB SIGHS
Mate, wake up. Come on, wake up!
-Right, come on, nae mare sitting doon for you.
-Does Andy sit doon?
-Aye, he sits down between sets.
Aye, well, he wouldnae if he was trying to stay awake, would he?
From here on in, I want you to be thinking, "What would Andy dae?"
-Because he's a winner and you're a winner too, Angus.
-I'm a loser.
No, come on, look, get up.
Come on, you're a winner, mate,
-and you're gonnae finish this study and win the money, right?
-And you're gonnae pay for the exhaust that you leathered.
-And gie me 10% for helping.
I got carried away there.
Don't worry about it.
He's not going to last another night unless we get him into hospital.
I understand Liz is his wife and it's her they need to get
the consent from but if we work together, we can persuade her.
I don't want to persuade her.
He needs to be allowed to go, it's the best thing.
But I'm here now.
I can take some of the burden, I'll look after him.
It's not about that, this isn't about me or Liz,
this is about my dad.
Right, well, let's just...
-get him through this and we'll see how he is.
-I know how he is.
We can't drag him to hospital and have him in pain
for weeks and weeks just...
so that you can get a bit of time at his bedside.
-I didn't know how bad he was.
-It doesn't matter now.
But even if there's a...
..a tiny wee hope that...
..that he sees me and...
Even for a moment.
-So I can...
So I can tell him how much I love him.
He knew, Gina. He knew.
-What can I do?
-Is that a joke?
Seriously, I want to help. Let me help.
It's got nothing to do with you, though, has it?
Drew's my son, no' yours.
You might be able to turn Jenny's head with your whole gay da' thing,
but Drew's mine.
You're not on your own.
But I was when I was 18, though, wasn't I?
When you left Jenny and me without even looking over your shoulder,
so don't think you can come in now and start trying to fix things.
I know what I did.
You think you know it all.
Things look different in the rear-view mirror.
Do you know what I had to do to make sure
-there was food on the table for Jenny and Ellie and me?
-And to keep the lights on!
That was then. This is now.
You don't get it, do you? This is then!
It's still then, it's never stopped being then for us.
Everything's that's ever happened to me and my kids
started the day you left.
-I was just a kid.
-So was I!
But you've lived a whole life since then,
so it seems like a lifetime ago to you.
But I'm still here, still picking through the mess you made.
-What do you want?
Well, Jenny called me about Drew.
There's nothing the matter wi' ma Drew.
Everyone just needs to butt out and leave me to it
cos I cannae rely on anyone.
Do you remember when we shared a room?
Of course. You were the messiest wee besom going.
-Do you remember I broke your doll?
-You decapitated her.
-Do you remember what Dad did?
He said I had to pick one of yours and do the same to it.
-I thought you were going to.
-But he knew you wouldn't, though.
I couldn't. You looked like wee Orphan Annie.
He was like Shieldinch's King Solomon.
He knew that if he let us make the decision, we'd do the right thing.
Do you remember the doll he made you?
-You're lucky he didn't make one for you.
-Mum wouldn't let him.
I've never had so many skelves.
It's OK. It's OK.
I'd forgotten what he was like.
I've been so busy running up and down to here and seeing him
so bewildered and not...
Not recognising me.
I'm sorry. Dad's getting worse.
Not going to be long, girls. I think we should all be with him.
-Are you OK with this?
I just want to say goodbye.
-KNOCKING ON DOOR
-It's Dr Jandhu, can I come in?
Sorry, but your sister was insistent I see you.
Look, I'll only be a minute and then I can get her off both our backs.
I'm fine. There's nothin' wrong with me.
-I hear you've got a nasty cut on your arm.
I thought I was the doctor.
I said it's fine.
Are you sure it's not infected?
Because you know if a cut gets infected, it could spread.
-Do you know that?
-I don't care.
And what about if you lost an arm or fell into a coma?
Would you care then?
Hi. It's nearly midday, should you no' be dressed?
Go inside, Callum.
-We had a great time, in case you're wondering.
Yeah, hello. Yeah, it's Lenny Murdoch here.
Listen, can I make an appointment?
Caitlin, can I have a word with you in private, please?
I'll give you a bit of space.
I've cleaned and dressed the wound. It should heal all right.
And I've told Drew that I'm going to make an appointment for him
-to come in and see me.
I'm going to refer him
to a specialist team who deal with adolescent mental health.
They may well refer him on for some therapy.
Well, that sounds like a shrink. He isnae crazy.
I know that, Caitlin.
It's a straightforward form of therapy.
It's got a good success rate with patients who are self-harming.
And how long's that going to take?
Well, I'm not going to lie you, you know, it can take a while to
get into therapy but, you know, I'll do everything I can to get him seen.
-But...like, what? Weeks?
-Well, more than likely, yes.
And what am I meant to do in the meantime?
Well, that's what I wanted to talk to you about.
Look, Caitlin, please, sit down.
Look, there are various harm-reduction strategies
-that we can employ.
-What do you mean?
Well, the biggest risks to Drew right now stem from infection.
And there are things that we can do to reduce those risks.
How about we stop him doing them altogether?
Well, yeah, of course,
we have to address the underlying problem but...
-Well, it's not going to happen overnight.
-We need to get a plan for right now.
-What does that mean?
If he's alone in his bedroom...
there's a risk he could take things too far.
Are you...? Do you think my son's trying to kill himself?
No, no, but the consequences of what he's doing could be fatal.
Look, I understand how you're feeling...
Get out now!
I'm sick of people trying to tell me what's best for my kids.
I'm the boy's mother!
-I know what's best! Me, no' you!
Come and see me when you've calmed down.
DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES
-Mum, what did Dr Jandhu say?
-A lot of nonsense.
-Where you going?
-To see your brother.
-I'm going to take these doors aff the hinges.
Do you think I cannae work a screwdriver?
I'm no' letting you out my sight.
-Mum, you can't watch him 24/7.
-Well, I wish I didnae have to.
-What? You gonnae come to school with me?
-If I have tae.
-Play football wi' me?
Doon the shoaps, hang about wi' all my pals?
I'm gonnae stick to you like flypaper.
What?! You gonnae come to the toilet wi' me tae?!
-I'm gonnae dae whatever it takes to save you...
-You cannae protect me!
-How can you be so stupid?!
It's no' your job to protect him!
I'm his mum.
I'm his mum!
You always said I was a bad mother.
And now I've gone and proved it, haven't I?
-I've wrecked their lives.
I thought I had it under control, I thought I could handle it.
You tried your best.
-I could've lost him.
-But you didn't.
I still might. I cannae stop him.
It's my fault. I'm poison.
That's not true.
That's why you left.
That's why Jenny wants to leave.
Everyone that gets away from me is better off for it.
Caitlin, I left because I'm gay.
It was nothing to do with you.
And Jenny isn't even leaving, she just wants to go to university
because you did such a brilliant job raising her.
She's...smart and ambitious and caring.
That's all you.
I'm no' even one of those things.
You raised Jenny, Caitlin.
Her successes are your successes.
You've so much to be proud of.
So why is my boy hurting himself?
Whether you like it or not, I'm here.
I'm not going anywhere.
I cannae do this on my own any more.
You're not alone, I promise.
I need help.
MELANCHOLIC MUSIC PLAYS
I held his hand...
..till it was cold.
I had to let it go.
This is not your fault.
I never gave those kids a chance.
You've always tried to do your best by them. It all started with me.
If I'd never have left, then you'd never have been in this situation.
Never met Pete.
-Never met Ruby's dad.
If I didnae meet them, well, I widnae have Drew or Ruby.
The kids are the only thing I ever did right.
Me too with Jenny.
How did I ever raise that girl?
I don't know.
But however you did it...
you did it right.
Drew's problem - it's a serious one but it's not the end of the world.
There are systems in place to help him.
And we can help him get better. Together.
I don't know what to say to him.
Well, you don't need to say anything.
Why don't you just...
listen for a bit?
You said you were going to give me advice on this decor.
-Maybe some other time, eh?
-I don't have the time, Kel'.
Amber's gonnae be here.
She's getting out soon and I thought,
"Well, you'd know better than me what a young lady would want, eh?"
I don't really know much about interior design.
-You spend enough time indoors.
-So that's what this is about?
-No, no. Ho.
Look, she's all I've got left, OK? Her and Callum.
You cannae go wrong with neutral colours - sand, cream.
-Sand and cream?
-Look, I know what you're going through.
-No, you don't.
-You lost a child.
-You have no idea how I feel.
You don't think I know what it's like,
to want to just chuck it all?
Every morning I wake up,
the first thing I think of is the people I've lost.
And right after that, I think of the people I still have - Amber, Cal,
That's the list that matters. Do you get me?
-Easier said than done, though, isn't it?
-I didn't say it was easy.
-It's no' easy.
-I'm no' ready.
Callum can't wait for you to be ready,
-he needs his mummy now.
-I'm there for Callum.
My baby just died. I'm allowed to grieve.
Look, going to do me a favour?
I've got an appointment with the doctor and I know it's daft,
but I don't like going in myself.
-Right, so when is your appointment, then?
-I need to get back home straight afterwards, right?
KNOCK AT DOOR
-I'm no' here to shout. I just want to talk.
What's going on in there, son?
-Please. Try and explain.
I just feel empty.
There is just... There's just nothing inside.
I get angry and frustrated. I mean, I don't even know who I am.
There's just nothing.
It doesnae sound mad. Is there anything I can do?
Do you know what it's like to only know half of who you are?
-You're Drew McLean, you're my son.
-I'm no' just YOUR son, though.
naebody else is like this. No' Jenny, no' Ruby, no' you.
So is this him?
Is this my da'?
I don't even know anything about him.
-It doesnae matter, Drew, he doesnae matter.
-He matters to me!
I know he does.
But knowing your dad...
..that isn't going to be the answer to all your problems.
That's not for you to decide.
I'm no' saying it's going to instantly fix me.
I'm just saying, at least if I know the other half of me,
I will know something.
Instead of nothing.
I will tell you about him, just no' now.
It's always "just no' now".
Let's get you better. Then we can talk about it all.
I'll never be better.
-I'm a freak.
-You are not a freak!
Do you want me to come in with you?
-What's going on?
-Just go and see her.
Are you ready?
-He's really gone.
-Come on, let's get you home, eh?
-Just going to give me a second?
It's just the minute we... get to the pub, we have to tell folk
and then it's really real.
-Who'll be next?
I know I'm being morbid but there's nothing between us and the horizon.
-We're hardly at death's door.
-No. But we can see it from the street.
I am all on my own.
No, you're not.
I did go to see your dad.
When you said you went to Tenerife?
Was it that obvious? I meant to get a sunbed when I came back.
Your dad isnae well.
-What do you mean?
-He was always sensitive.
When I was pregnant it got worse.
Then when you were born, it got desperate. He was depressed.
It was a bad situation.
Drew, I want you to know that I only ever did what I thought was right.
What DID you do?
I took you and Jenny and I left.
I needed to protect you.
Maybe I should have stayed and looked after him but...
I had two kids to think of.
-I always thought he left because of me.
-No, son, no. Not at all.
Is that what you've thought all this time?
I'm like him, ain't I?
That's why you went to go and see him, cos I'm like him.
You have got some of his good qualities. You're thoughtful...
sensitive. You don't get that from me.
But if you mean if you're like him, like his illness, well, no, you're no'.
You're no' like him. Here...
-Is... Is that...?
That's what you would
look like with a moustache.
Don't ever grow a moustache!
Nae news is good news, though, uh?
-I hope so.
-Aye, Malcolm's Clyde-built.
-Is Angus all right?
Well, he's been in the toilet for an awful long time.
-He's probably fell asleep.
-What is he, a nymphomaniac?
Is he a what?
You know, one of they people who falls asleep all the time.
No, what it is is that...
-All right, Stella?
-I didn't know you were back.
-Aye, Stella's back.
-Is Stevie with you?
-No, he's not with me the now.
-I was just wondering if there was any news?
-No, nothing yet.
-Can I see wee Hope?
-Course you can.
All right, pal? Hiya.
FRUIT MACHINE BEEPS
Did you all see that?
You'll have to narrow it down a bit, mate.
That big guy with the beard. The big kind of Braveheart-looking kind of guy.
Don't torture him!
-Aye, Willy. So he's real?
At weekends he does a Billy Connolly tribute act
and then during the week he's a Highlander at a tourist centre.
It was his exhaust you battered earlier on.
I thought I was losing it there.
Forget about this money, I just need to go to sleep.
I... I just wanted to...
I just wanted to let you all know that our dad died earlier today.
Eileen, I am so sorry.
I can't believe it.
Tell me I hallucinated that.
No, mate, you didnae.
-Are you OK?
-Listen, I am sorry, darling. I have been a nightmare.
-I couldn't be prouder of you.
My wee Jenny going to be a doctor.
-I'm probably not even going to go.
-Aye, you are.
You'll be going to university if I have to drag you there.
You have to live the life of your dreams.
I mean, if you don't,
then all we have been through has been for nothing.
Someone has got to earn enough money to get us a big house!
Right, I better make a move.
All right, no need to keep angling, you can stay.
-Aye, for dinner.
I'm no' offering you a bunk-up!
-Don't make me regret asking you.
-It's your turn to buy the chips.
Aye, you've got 17 years' worth of chips to buy back.
Welcome to the family.
# You won't regret it
# Women don't forget it
# Love is their whole happiness
# And it's all so easy
# Try a little tenderness... #
"These are the things I want you to do for my funeral.
"No stuffy church service."
And he's written a eulogy that he wants Gabriel Brodie to read.
-Is he even coming?
You do what you like but I won't be a part of it.
Dad's gone now and having Brian here today would just