Episode 2 The Fear


Episode 2

The horror film competition contest in terrifying fashion with four more chilling shorts. Will the audience judge any scary enough to knock last week's off the leaderboard?


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Transcript


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This programme contains some strong language and some scenes which some viewers may find upsetting

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DOG BARKS

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From the chill down your neck

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to the stain in your pants,

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fear can do many things.

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It can chill... THEY SCREAM

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..thrill... SHE WAILS

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-..and entertain...

-Oh, my God!

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..which is precisely why we're here.

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We've asked amateur film makers to send us their creepiest,

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goriest, and freakiest short horror films

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for your viewing pleasure.

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Movies such as Saw and Evil Dead

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both started out as shorts

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before becoming multi-million dollar franchises.

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So we're hoping to find the next horror master

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worthy of a blood-curdling blockbuster.

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MAN YELLS This is The Fear,

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where who scares wins.

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Oh, my God!

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THUNDER RUMBLES, DOG BARKS

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Welcome to the screaming room.

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As a kid, many things scare you -

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spiders, PE, weird Uncle Pete.

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As an adult, it's pay-day loans, my waistline,

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and still weird Uncle Pete.

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But what scares an audience of horror fans?

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Here they'll be watching a host of terrifying short films,

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they'll vote for the scariest in this special cinema,

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rigged with cameras to catch their every jump...

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YELPING AND SCREAMING ..scream and cry.

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So let's welcome back the horror fans tasked with rating our films...

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..including London boys Antoine, Nick and Daniel,

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who are using the competition to bring themselves closer.

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Get the fuck out of here, mate.

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Newly-dating Poppy and Joe.

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It's very, very, very easy to scare Poppy.

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SHE YELPS

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Oh, my God, argh!

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No! Stop it!

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I think I'm a tougher scare than she is, definitely.

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Bringing a philosophical spin to the experience

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are nurses and besties Aaron and Michelle.

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I want to be scared.

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Then I'm left in a puddle of piss.

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Yeah, sitting there in your own shit.

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No, I wouldn't... No, it smells more.

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And at two ends of the horror fan spectrum,

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sisters Amelia and Grace.

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I'm basically the person you don't want to sit next to

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if you're going to watch a horror film.

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SHE SCREAMS

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Now you know why we're just in the middle on our own.

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And film buffs Ash and Brad.

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I think it's the hardest thing you can possibly pull off,

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to genuinely scare someone.

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I think you're going to jump today.

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-If you jump before I do...

-Yep.

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..you have to get my face tattooed on your arm.

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I'll do it on my leg.

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Remember, these little monsters

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will be scoring the films on scariness alone

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and all the films are under four minutes

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and made by amateur film makers.

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So onto the first film of the evening.

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It's called Capture and was made by Kiefer McGinn

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and Rachael Hegarty from Ireland.

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She likes taking pictures of dandelions.

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He likes making 3D dogs

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and that is why it works.

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Viewers at home, stop looking at Twitter for a second,

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turn the lights off and get ready to get freaked out,

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because it's show time!

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Sh! Sh!

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Lizzie?

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Lizzie, wake up.

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We're here.

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Look.

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LIZZIE YAWNS

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SHE GASPS

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Peter, it's perfect!

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Wow.

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Look at this place.

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You like it?

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I love it!

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We finally have a home!

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Hey, look what I found.

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Whoa!

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FLASH BULB POPS

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FLASH BURSTS

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FLASH BURSTS

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Hello?

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Who's there?

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SHE SCREAMS

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SHE WAILS

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SHE HYPERVENTILATES

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Lizzie, Lizzie, what's going on?

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There's a woman in the corridor!

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What?

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Lizzie, Lizzie, calm...calm...

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Calm down.

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Calm... Calm down!

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There's no-one, there's no-one there.

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There's no-one. There's no-one there, OK?

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See, there's no-one there.

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Is the camera there?

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It's right there.

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How did it get there?

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Lizzie...

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You must be dreaming, all right?

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Just go back to bed.

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CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS

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Peter?

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Hang on, OK?

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SHE MOUTHS SILENTLY

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SCREAM

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HE EXCLAIMS

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Peter!

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SHE WHIMPERS

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SHE SHRIEKS

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What do you want?!

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-You!

-SHE SCREAMS

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No! No!

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Stop, please!

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No! No!

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No-o-o-o-o-o!

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CREDIT MUSIC PLAYS

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"What do you want?!"

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-BOTH:

-"You!"

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Move into a new house and get murdered on your first night.

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Good old Irish hospitality at its best there,

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but did it scare the craic out of that lot?

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They're scoring all films on a scariness scale of one to ten.

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At the end of the competition,

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Blair Witch Project's co-director Eduardo Sanchez

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will view the three scariest films and pick the ultimate winner.

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He'll take that lucky director a step closer to Hollywood

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with £20,000 worth of support

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for their next fright-fest.

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So, did our first film of the night capture the audience's heart?

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-It was scary.

-That film there, that was top notch, to be fair.

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I had a brief look around during the film

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and noticed that people were really on the edge of their seats.

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This film had quite a few jumps.

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-Oh!

-Oh!

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It made me jump, like, four times,

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so I thought it was really scary.

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WOMAN SCREAMING

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Oh, my God!

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The big old country house in the middle of nowhere was

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certainly classic horror film fodder.

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I would never live in an old mansion because...you're asking for trouble.

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If the poltergeist doesn't get you, the heating bills will.

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I know. We're finally home.

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Oh, it's perfect! And then, I'm, like,

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"Who the fuck buys a house without consulting their wife nowadays?"

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Exactly.

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-Who's there?

-WOMAN SCREAMING

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If I went for a weekend away with Joe, I'd make sure

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-he's the one that dies.

-Wow.

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You know, you've got to look after yourself.

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Ah, who said romance is dead? Probably Joe, that's who.

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Still, if you're going to get tormented and brutally murdered

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by an evil entity, there's solace in a familiar face.

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You.

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I think the ghost in that film

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definitely looked like Marilyn Manson.

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It was disgusting, to be fair.

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No offence to Marilyn Manson.

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The lady looked a little bit like Amelia, going to be honest here.

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-I mean it in a nice way.

-Is there a nice way to go about that?

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MEOW! Moving on.

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Capture seemed to make an impression with our cinemagoers,

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but was it enough to net a place on the competition leaderboard?

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Stay with us, because we'll be revealing all the scores

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at the end of the show.

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# La, la, la, la, la-la-la. #

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Our next film is called Chestwyrm

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and was directed by teacher Gary Rogers.

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It really makes you wonder what kind of education our kids are getting

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when you see what's on their teachers' minds.

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Be warned, the following film contains scenes of a graphic nature.

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ALARM BLARES

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It's been three months since I left this shithole.

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Three fucking months.

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HE COUGHS

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HE COUGHS AND RETCHES

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I can't leave.

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Every time I get close, it stops me.

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HE COUGHS AND SPITS

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It can fucking hear what I'm thinking.

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What are you? Why are you keeping me here?!

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I want out of here.

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I hate this fucking thing.

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I don't know how much more of this I can take.

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I went crazy after the first week

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and now...

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Now, I'm just praying for it all to end.

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One way or another, I'm going to die in here.

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Yeah! Do you like that, eh?

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You like that, you fucker?!

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CREATURE SCREECHES

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It doesn't matter that I'm dying.

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I'm out of that thing.

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Squashed...

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but free at last.

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-Oh, my God.

-HE LAUGHS

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-Oh, my God.

-That was gross!

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-That was so gross.

-That was so gory.

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You almost died in that one.

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HE WHIMPERS

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Wow. That was probably the goriest film

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we've had in the competition so far

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and with reactions that good, it would be rude not to see them again.

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So, here's Michelle and her popcorn slowly becoming one.

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Ah! AHHH!

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Poppy turning into an "Oh, my God" gif, or jif, or whatever.

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Oh, my God!

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Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

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Oh, my God!

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And Amelia doing...I don't know.

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What is he? Is that a worm?!

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I'd say, yes, Amelia, that was a worm.

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And while all that was going on, this is how Ash reacted.

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HE LAUGHS

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That sicko looked like he was in the Adam Sandler matinee next door

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and that's why we like him.

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I'll never unsee what I witnessed on that screen. It was disgusting.

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SHE STAMMERS

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Do you just want a second to gather yourself a little bit?

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I'm going to be sick!

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But if Chestwyrm had our audience feeling rank,

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spare a thought for the film's lead character.

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Yeah, at the beginning of the film, you do wonder if he's just hungover

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and he's had a bit of a mental night, don't you?

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I've certainly woken up on numerous occasions feeling as bad as he did.

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I really felt for him, like, I wanted to give him a hug.

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He had a really nice voice as well, which helped.

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I don't know how much more of this I can take.

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Hold on, who had the nice voice?

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In amongst all the blood and worm guts, Amelia missed the twist,

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but in fairness, she wasn't alone.

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There was a twist? Did you get it?

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-I'm asking you, did you two get the twist?

-What was the twist?

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Now I'm just praying for it all to end.

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I had a feeling early on, maybe this first person voice we're hearing

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is actually something inside him.

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When the twist arrives that it's actually the worm

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inside the guy who's narrating and that's why he wants to get out,

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I thought that was a really, really good twist.

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Squashed, but free at last.

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-Oh, yeah, the little worm. Oh.

-Oh!

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The worm was the voice!

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Ew! The worm had such a good-looking voice.

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So it had twists and worms, but did it deliver on the fear front?

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Chestwyrm is actually a pretty great short film.

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Films I've watched at home have never made me react that way.

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(I'm going to be sick!)

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I actually can't stop thinking about this film.

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It's still in my mind, so I think that's a good sign,

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cos it shocked us.

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Well, we'll be seeing later whether Chestwyrm's shock and gore tactics

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were enough for it to wriggle its way into contention.

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Our next film tonight, Visitation, promises to be short,

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but hopefully not very sweet.

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Directed by 22-year-old Welsh YouTuber Sam Evans,

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who works in a tiny room.

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We must warn you, this one is very dark, so turn the lights down,

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don't adjust the volume and keep your eyes locked to the screen.

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HAUNTING MUSIC PLAYS

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SILENCE

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EERIE MUSIC

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SCREAMING IN CINEMA

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Are you all right? Do you just need a moment to gather yourself now?

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That one actually made me jump.

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Incredibly simple yet remarkably effective,

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like a windmill or a kick to the nuts.

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But did Visitation's little visitor fire up the fear in our audience?

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For me personally, that's my type of film. I like the simplicity.

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There's not much going on, so your brain's really doing

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the working of what's going to happen next.

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So when it did happen...

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SCREAMING

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..it was like, "OK, boom, bam."

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-You wasn't scared this time?

-No, I wasn't scared.

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-You didn't flinch?

-No, of course.

-I felt something, but OK. Yeah.

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Then again, obviously, I wasn't scared,

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cos, then again, I was sneezing.

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Eh, bruv.

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I thought it was going to absolutely terrify me.

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I was on edge on the basis of the name.

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That kind of started to tap into my whole alien fear.

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Oh, fuck.

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It's going to be aliens.

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But I was pretty happy when it turned out to be demons,

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cos I didn't want to look stupid on telly when I started to cry.

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I thought something was going to happen at the door,

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and then when that face just came up right in front, I mean...

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Oh, wow.

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-SHE SCREAMS

-Oh!

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HE LAUGHS

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Ah, yes - the creature.

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A little cutie as far as I'm concerned, but then...I have issues.

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The monster looked like a Freddy Krueger head,

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but it was still good.

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It was a good head.

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It was a little bit like a rotting demon boner.

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THEY LAUGH

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Right.

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Rotting demon boners aside,

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could this basic beauty of a movie prove to be a game-changer?

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SCREAMING

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This film definitely made me

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think more about what's needed for a film to be scary,

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because this was so simple, no dialogue, one take,

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and it was probably the scariest one.

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-Yeah.

-Oh, it was so scary.

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You know it's coming, but it still gets you.

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So Visitation left our audience jumpier than a cricket on a campfire,

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but did it do enough to earn a place on the leaderboard?

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Find out at the end of the show.

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Yeah, mate.

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I need some more popcorn.

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-Want some popcorn?

-Yes. No, I've got some.

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Amelia, really? Seriously? Amelia, please.

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-OK, it's just popcorn.

-Amelia!

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-AMELIA LAUGHS

-Stop it.

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My ice gems are all gone.

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Remember, this competition isn't just about scaring you for fun.

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The three films that terrify our audience the most

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will be shown to Blair Witch co-director Eduardo Sanchez,

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who will choose one to win £20,000 worth of support.

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That would be bellissimo news to the maker of our final film tonight.

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It's Federico Sfascia from Italia.

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Federico appears to live in a dark attic with his cats,

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drawings of girls and his Doctor Who notebook.

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Well, film geeks are the same all over the world.

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And trust me, it takes one to know one.

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Anyway, here's his film - D.S.

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-I don't think...

-Oh...

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-Dun-dun-dun-dun!

-Heee!

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You know this cinema is haunted, right?

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GLASS SHATTERS

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PHONE RINGS

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PHONE BEEPS

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PHONE RINGS

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Is this a comedy?

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PHONE BEEPS

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PHONE RINGS

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RINGING CONTINUES

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PHONE BEEPS

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HE SCREAMS

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JAUNTY MUSIC PLAYS

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CACKLING

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HE SCREAMS

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JAUNTY MUSIC PLAYS

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CACKLING

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CLATTERING

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HE LAUGHS

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BEEPING

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CACKLING

0:23:440:23:46

PHONE BEEPS

0:24:030:24:06

CACKLING

0:24:200:24:23

Oh, my God!

0:24:310:24:33

That was so bizarre!

0:24:340:24:36

That was my favourite one. That was my actual favourite.

0:24:360:24:39

Of course it was your favourite one. It panders to all your tastes.

0:24:390:24:42

-I know!

-Juvenile idiot.

0:24:420:24:45

-The film or me?

-Both.

0:24:450:24:48

Juvenile and idiotic!

0:24:480:24:50

Not a great three-word review, but did the rest of the audience agree?

0:24:500:24:54

Demon Sitter, what was this?

0:24:560:24:59

It was like a piece of art and at the same time, it was a mess.

0:24:590:25:03

I loved it so much!

0:25:030:25:05

I don't know what it was meant to be.

0:25:050:25:08

I hope it was meant to be funny,

0:25:080:25:10

because I laughed my arse off all the way through it.

0:25:100:25:12

I was like, "Ah!"

0:25:120:25:14

I've never seen her so happy

0:25:140:25:15

after the end of a film that's supposed to scare you!

0:25:150:25:18

I just loved it, I want to watch it again and again.

0:25:180:25:22

Yes, fun to watch, but would you be comfortable

0:25:220:25:25

telling those demon critters it's bedtime at eight?

0:25:250:25:28

I don't think I'd ever want to babysit Satan's babies

0:25:280:25:31

and I hope I never have to!

0:25:310:25:33

I thought they were cute in a way.

0:25:330:25:36

Ratty little things.

0:25:360:25:37

It's kind of cuddly.

0:25:370:25:39

As long as it didn't bite your tongue out.

0:25:390:25:41

Ooh!

0:25:410:25:42

Have you ever had a bad kisser like that? All tongue?

0:25:420:25:45

Washing machine.

0:25:450:25:47

Spin cycle.

0:25:470:25:50

I wouldn't mind some demons looking after me!

0:25:500:25:53

-I'd quite like that.

-What'd you feed them though?

0:25:530:25:55

Meat, probably. Ask Satan.

0:25:550:25:57

I ain't got his number.

0:25:570:25:59

It made me chuckle so much.

0:25:590:26:01

I think I liked it because it was different.

0:26:010:26:05

That is everything I love about the horror comedy genre. It's superb.

0:26:050:26:08

I'm pretty sure that DS notched up more LOLs than scares,

0:26:080:26:12

so I'm intrigued to see how that rates for fear factor,

0:26:120:26:16

and with tonight's final scores in,

0:26:160:26:18

it's time to take a look at all the films to see how they scored.

0:26:180:26:23

So, in fourth place is critter comedy DS.

0:26:270:26:33

If you're watching, film-maker, I adored your film,

0:26:340:26:37

but it just wasn't scary and that's what we're judging it on.

0:26:370:26:40

Next up, in third, is Visitation.

0:26:400:26:43

I don't think it made me very scared.

0:26:430:26:46

I just think it made me jump because it was so...in your face.

0:26:460:26:50

So, who finished top? The one with the worm or the one with the camera?

0:26:500:26:54

In at 2, it's Chestwyrm.

0:26:540:26:57

I don't think I've ever been

0:26:570:26:59

affected by a gory film like that, ever.

0:26:590:27:02

Which makes Capture our scariest film of the night.

0:27:020:27:05

I think Capture is quite a strong contender for being able

0:27:070:27:10

to win this competition.

0:27:100:27:12

So, in the overall top three, What It Wants is out,

0:27:120:27:15

and with a score of 6.9,

0:27:150:27:17

Capture sits pretty at number 2.

0:27:170:27:20

So, congratulations to Capture, but for how long?

0:27:230:27:25

Will it still be there after next week's terrifying treats?

0:27:250:27:29

Coming soon...

0:27:290:27:31

This was weird.

0:27:310:27:32

It was really unnecessary!

0:27:320:27:34

That is just evil.

0:27:340:27:37

Oh, my God!

0:27:370:27:40

I didn't see it coming, no.

0:27:400:27:42

-What would you have done?

-Weed myself.

0:27:420:27:44

Jesus Christ!

0:27:440:27:46

Wow.

0:27:480:27:50

The audience lost their minds.

0:27:500:27:52

What? What is that?

0:27:520:27:54

Until then, sleep tight.

0:27:560:27:58

Series searching for the scariest amateur horror film in the UK in a competition which brings the phenomenon of homemade horror into the living room to unearth the next big horror director.

Short horror films are judged by a cinema audience, who score each film on its scariness alone. The cinema auditorium is rigged with night vision cameras to capture each and every terrified reaction.

The audience's top three highest-scoring films from across the series will be shown to world-renowned director Eduardo Sanchez (The Blair Witch Project) who will pick one as a winner. That lucky film-maker will walk away with £20,000 worth of support and funding towards their next project.

Host Matthew Giffen controls the show from the projection room, guiding us through the competition with wit, charm and a small dose of creepiness.


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