Episode 2 Versailles


Episode 2

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This programme contains some violent scenes and some scenes of a sexual nature from the start

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HE SIGHS

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SOLDIERS MARCH IN UNISON WITH LOUIS'S FOOTSTEPS

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CREAKING

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CRACKING

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CRASHING

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GLASS PATTERS

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-BONTEMPS:

-My king!

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ALARMED SHOUTING

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The Lord is making himself very clear to you, Your Majesty.

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By throwing chandeliers at me?

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By disturbing your sleep.

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Compelling you to ruminate.

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I see the crevices in the plaster, Sire.

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This accident with the chandelier...

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The facade is crumbling from within.

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All of us require work inside, Your Majesty,

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some of it more urgent than others.

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I am in no need of refurbishment.

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My concern is for your immortal soul.

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I'm going to war with that heretic Protestant upstart.

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Will that suffice?

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Your campaign against Holland, Sire, is just,

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but it is your moral conduct that stirs God to act.

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Your Church and your God cannot condone a double adultery.

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Your continued relations with a married woman are incurring a debt,

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and the reckoning is not yet paid.

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I do not respond well to threats, Bishop.

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Neither does the Almighty.

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Sire, the Lord is speaking to you as he spoke to Elijah,

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in a still, small voice.

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Abandon God, he will abandon you,

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and you will fall into eternal darkness.

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I'm marching 25,000 men to claim Holland

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from the unbelievers in the name of the one true Church.

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I've no doubt that God is on my side.

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As for you, Bishop...

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sometimes I wonder.

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THEY MOAN

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< MUFFLED MOANS

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-Yes! Yes!

-HE GROANS

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Yes! Yes! Yes!

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SHE SCREAMS

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BOTH SCREAM

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Yes! God in Heaven...!

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DOOR OPENS

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Madame.

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Confine her.

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If you compel her to a lying-in you protect both the child and her.

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You also remove my daily ritual of public humiliation.

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It stings to see her swollen stomach,

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that bloated pride paraded.

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You're visiting a great cruelty upon me and I'm begging you to stop.

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-This is highly irregular, madame.

-I talk as your WIFE. Hear me!

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Every night, before retiring. You know my promise...

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-The promise is empty.

-The king must perform his duties, madame.

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Did you not understand what it meant to marry one?

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I understand deeply,

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but as your wife

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I don't like who you've become.

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Who would that be, precisely?

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You're changing and it scares me.

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You may be the Sun King, but, of late,

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when I look into your eyes, all I see is shadow.

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# I'm the king of my own land

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# Facing tempests of dust

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# I'll fight until the end

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# Creatures of my dreams

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# Raise up and dance with me

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# Now and forever

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# I'm your king! #

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Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

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No.

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Of course you are,

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and I completely agree with you. It's self-evident.

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Abbiamo bisogno di piu del vino.

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CHEVALIER WHISTLES

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We need more wine.

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HE GRUNTS

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Aah!

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Now I'm home.

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I missed you.

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-HE KISSES

-And I...mourned...

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your...absence...

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every...day.

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SLAP! HE LAUGHS

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And while I will admit there were others...

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who vied for my affection...

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I can assure you, I was utterly faithful and true.

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Those Italians are persistent, though, I grant you.

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HE SIGHS

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I hear the King has finished the building work

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and is finally doing something about that interior.

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Imagine - new art, better chairs,

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clocks that work,

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frescoes all over the place,

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and so much gold it looks like King Midas

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went around fondling the entire palace.

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-HE CLICKS FINGERS

-Chamber pot!

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Do you know there were even moments in Rome

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when I actually missed the old place?

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I'm not going back there, you know.

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Quite right. Why would you?

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He broke my heart and destroyed my life.

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-CHEVALIER GROANS IN PAIN

-My poor Henriette.

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-TRICKLING

-It was that palace that killed her, believe me.

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AND poison, but, yes,

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hardly acceptable behaviour.

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You must never return.

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Even if he is your only brother.

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I'm simply saying...!

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My own brother once challenged me to a duel.

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I had to wound him in the clavicle to prevent him from firing on me.

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Honestly, families!

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THUNDER RUMBLES

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There is a fashion in the salons for recreational powders,

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substances to enhance and encourage amorous congress.

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I believe that the death of Minister Reynaud

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is connected to the use of these powders.

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-He consumed too much, perhaps.

-Not exactly, Sire.

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His widow was seen to be placing powders in the Minister's wine.

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-She is still under arrest, is she not?

-She is.

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And she may have inadvertently administered the dose to Reynaud,

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but she is not, herself, the poisoner.

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-That makes no sense.

-She was the vessel.

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Precisely, Sire.

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The phial she used for the love powders was replaced

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with another identical phial, containing a very powerful poison.

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-She could have done this herself, of course.

-She could. However,

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she attempted to sample the powder to prove her innocence.

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If I had not prevented her, she would now be dead.

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What do you propose?

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My forces have already commenced operations, Sire.

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I will find the source of these powders

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by first identifying how they are brought to Versailles.

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Good.

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HE SNORTS

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HE SNIFFS

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HE CLICKS FINGERS

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So, it is settled.

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We shall stay here.

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It's perfectly lovely.

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Just you and I.

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We shall throw a party for all our friends.

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All our friends are over there.

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At the "centre of the world"(!)

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Trust me, the world is really nothing special.

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What I saw of it from prison, anyway...

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You're lucky you kept your head on your shoulders.

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-It's almost as if the King were punishing me for something.

-Mm!

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People conspire every day. It's hardly against the law.

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It's called treason?

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Well...

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HE SCOFFS AND LAUGHS

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Versailles can be the centre of whatever world it likes.

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You are the centre of mine, mignonette.

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We shall be just the two of us.

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This is what he does it, you know? Piece by piece.

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-Oh, God...

-First, he took my wife...

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-No...

-..and now, he's taken all of my friends!

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Stop it!

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And, yes, very soon, your freedom.

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He will marry you again, won't he?

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-He can hardly compel you to...

-He will find a way.

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All right!

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We should have the biggest party in the world...

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..to welcome me back to civilisation.

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Invite most of our best friends,

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and all of our worst ones, too - we want it to be FUN after all!

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-CHEVALIER LAUGHS

-They won't come.

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You know, I feared this would happen.

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In my absence, you've become pathetic.

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Does it really take me to tell you this?

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Does your brother control you so strongly

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that you cannot see it for yourself?

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The King has filled that palace with every single one of YOUR admirers.

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Louis might be their king, but the man they truly worship?

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Hm?

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Why, that would be you.

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He might be...

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the sun, my dear,

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but you...

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..are the star...

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..and it is time you showed your brother

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how brightly you can sparkle.

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I don't know if you've ever noticed,

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but while the sun rules the day, it is the stars that rule the night.

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Hm.

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I did miss you a great deal.

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I know.

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Tell me again.

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ALL LAUGH AND GIGGLE

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CHATTER

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MAN GROWLS, THEY SQUEAL

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PACING FOOTSTEPS

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-You must sit.

-I prefer to walk.

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The child would benefit from your repose.

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The child is running a country mile no matter what I do.

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In any case, it will soon be out of me

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and we shall hear no more about it.

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I saw Gaston de Foix doing some pacing of his own earlier.

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Most despondent.

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You know, I think he's still has not overcome his disappointment.

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I think he truly thought he had a chance of succeeding as a minister.

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He DID have a chance,

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but he was not the choice.

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Still, I do wonder, if he might perform more energetically.

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Cassel is, after all, rather decrepit, is he not?

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You must know that I have been asked for my opinion on him

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and his position, and I must tell you, Sire...

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The Duc de Cassel is like a savage dog with a nose for danger.

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Better to have him sniffing at my feet

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than out there in the woods with my enemies.

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Nevertheless, if his name or his face appears to me,

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I must tell you it will be impossible for me to feign delight.

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I understand that it is hard...

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..but not impossible.

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CHATTER

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Madame de Reynaud is guilty, of course.

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But what a tragedy for one so young.

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What will the King do?

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Have her executed.

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And rightly so.

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Murder will always receive its just reward.

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INDISTICT SPEECH

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WHISPERING: Are you sure you're ready?

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INDISTICT SPEECH

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What happens now?

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He says to come back in an hour.

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And...do I pay you?

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No, the first one's on me, my dear.

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HE EXHALES Crowded.

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More nobles' families arrived last night, Sire. 22 in all.

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Can we accommodate them?

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We will make room.

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The new lodgings on the approach should be completed by the spring.

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Congratulations, Sire.

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Your dream of Versailles is made flesh.

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I had thought it standard to confine a woman

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in the final weeks of pregnancy.

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Are you trying to pay me a compliment, Gaston?

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Because I fear you need a spot of practice.

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My apologies! SHE CHUCKLES

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It appears my son is...is drunk.

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And you appear to be frustrated.

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It pains me to say, I am, madame.

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Since you, in the past,

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assured me so clearly of your desire to help my family.

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The desire was never lacking, madame.

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In any case, I helped you as far as I was able.

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I spoke highly of your son to the King.

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It's not my fault your son cannot walk through an open door.

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It's very simple, you know -

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one foot in front of the other.

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Perhaps you can give him a lesson.

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Goodnight.

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Are you completely without quality?

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Go on like this, there's no future in politics.

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Make an enemy of the most powerful woman in France

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and I doubt you'll have any future at all.

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You see him over there?

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Beauregarde?

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He fell foul of her and he's been sliding down the ranks ever since.

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Three weeks ago he was holding the King's shoe and now look at him.

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Removed from the cuffs.

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You do what I tell you to do,

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say what I tell you to say, and we will triumph!

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But you must trust that I know what I'm doing.

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Only if we work together we will prevail.

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You have no idea how this place works, Mother.

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I know a sight more than you do, let me tell you!

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INDISTINCT SPEECH

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HE SIGHS

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Did you make a note of who delivered it?

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A friend of the friend.

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I do not know him...yet.

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One step at a time.

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They make it with a fly from Spain.

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There's one called Desire which is wonderful.

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-I don't believe I've ever had the pleasure.

-Oh...

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and if you mix it with one called Tranquility, it works very well.

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It has willow bark and valerian.

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We put it in our drink when we play Madame Scudery's stupid game.

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I would love to try it.

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Oh, well you have to.

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You simply must! Come on.

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CHATTER

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It's just there.

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-Hello...

-Good evening.

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-MAN:

-The King!

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-HUSH DESCENDS MAN:

-Sire.

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-I hope you're settling in.

-Yes, Your Majesty.

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Is it poison? SIZZLING

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No.

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This is the effect of the love potion in a larger dose.

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The blistering is nearly instantaneous.

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It's what causes the blood to rush to the organs.

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The effect is that strong?

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And very common.

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You once cured me of certain ill effects.

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I know their symptoms and how best to heal them.

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And how to improve them, perhaps?

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You're concerned I might use my knowledge to create

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a more powerful poison?

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The thought had crossed my mind.

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That would make me a witch, would it not?

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In my opinion, it would only make you useful.

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You're not eating.

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I can see it very clearly.

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Stay for supper.

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My soup is fresh and untainted by any tonic.

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His Excellency, Envoy Zweibrucken from the Palatinate, Sire.

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What are your terms?

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The initial meeting shall take place on...

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On sovereign territory within the Ile de France.

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Acceptable, but not ideal, you see, on the side of the Palatinate,

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we must insist on the adherence to our protocol.

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She is marrying my brother.

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It is a pairing, Sire, of two sides...

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United in allegiance against the Dutch Republic in the north.

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The initial meeting must proceed as follows -

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the Princess will be accompanied by a retinue

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of three ladies-in-waiting, four horse guards...

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"..eight outriders, plus two in addition of her personal guards.

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"The Prince will arrive first at the meeting point..."

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-Very best of luck with that(!)

-Stop it!

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Oh, please(!) As if you've ever been early to anything in your life!

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Blah-blah-blah - protocol, protocol, protocol!

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"..with the introductions effected by the two retinues,

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"at which point, the Princess and the Prince..."

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That should be the other way round, surely?

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"..will strip to the waist and wrestle in the filth

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"and detritus of the forest floor."

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It doesn't say that.

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Um... No, it doesn't!

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What about the end?

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Um...

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HE TUTS

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At the end...

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"You say greetings, she says good day,

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"you both agree this is a ludicrous idea,

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"make a plan never to see each other,

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"and you and I get drunk for three days."

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-GRUFFLY:

-But look at her face!

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She seems...handsome...

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I hear she's fond of bratwurst.

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Important for any married couple to share a common interest.

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German food is very tasty.

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At the end...

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We ride together into Versailles.

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Sounds nice.

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Oh, Sire!

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-What are you doing?

-Spreading manure, Sire.

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It's what gives the plants and flowers their strength and colour.

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-HE CLAPS

-Back to work!

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Do you ever feel that no part of this life is worth the struggle,

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since we all return to the same place?

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Your father would say much the same thing, Sire.

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In truth, I had not thought of my father for...a very long time.

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May I ask a very delicate question, Sire?

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Your father's hunting lodge once stood in these grounds.

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To build your palace, you could have destroyed it.

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Why, Sire?

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Did you wish to preserve his memory?

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He loved to come here.

0:22:430:22:45

Now, should his spirit seek to return,

0:22:450:22:49

all he will see...

0:22:490:22:51

will belong to me.

0:22:510:22:53

Who is that, Majesty?

0:23:000:23:02

Don't you know Father Pascal from Paris?

0:23:020:23:05

Only by reputation. Though from what I hear, quite a zealous soul...

0:23:050:23:09

He's a good friend.

0:23:090:23:11

I understand he is a passionate man of God.

0:23:110:23:14

I invited him here to deliver the sermon on Sunday.

0:23:140:23:17

I was not aware I required reinforcements, Majesty.

0:23:170:23:21

Well, now you are.

0:23:210:23:22

To fight the Devil requires not just a man, but an army.

0:23:220:23:25

CHATTER AND LAUGHTER

0:23:290:23:32

ALL GIGGLE

0:23:470:23:49

ALL MOAN

0:23:510:23:53

'Sin!'

0:23:570:24:00

We all know why we are here.

0:24:000:24:01

But where, exactly, are we going?

0:24:020:24:05

He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.

0:24:070:24:11

That is what the Gospel of John has taught us.

0:24:140:24:17

When Jesus saw none but the woman,

0:24:170:24:19

he said unto her, "Woman, hath no man condemned thee?"

0:24:190:24:23

She said, "No man, Lord."

0:24:240:24:27

And Jesus said unto her, "Neither do I condemn thee.

0:24:270:24:30

"Go, but sin no more!"

0:24:320:24:34

We live under Almighty God

0:24:360:24:39

and under His eternal gaze.

0:24:390:24:42

Only He may be our judge.

0:24:450:24:47

(He's very good, isn't he?)

0:24:480:24:50

Father Pascal speaks from the heart.

0:24:590:25:02

A suitable choice of Gospel.

0:25:020:25:04

Spoken with a fresh voice means it's heard with fresh ears.

0:25:040:25:08

A fine sermon.

0:25:090:25:11

Very subtle.

0:25:110:25:13

Such a shame you didn't deliver it yourself, Bishop.

0:25:130:25:17

-Father Pascal is visiting us from Paris.

-How convenient...

0:25:170:25:21

..don't you think?

0:25:230:25:25

It's so much easier to get to town now they're improving the road.

0:25:250:25:28

I would welcome your confession, madame, if you have time?

0:25:290:25:33

I always have time for a man in a dress.

0:25:340:25:36

-SHUTTER CLUNKS

-Very well. Let's get this over with.

0:25:380:25:42

You must end this affair with His Majesty at once.

0:25:420:25:45

-And there we have it.

-You expected a different subject?

0:25:450:25:48

You know, the world would run much more smoothly

0:25:480:25:50

if people like you weren't so uptight!

0:25:500:25:52

If only you didn't have this tiresome vow of chastity...

0:25:520:25:55

My vows are bonded to my soul.

0:25:550:25:57

I would suggest the holy pledges of your own spousal contract

0:25:570:26:01

might be treated with the same reverence.

0:26:010:26:03

My higher purpose lies with our king.

0:26:030:26:06

My greater calling is to lie with him and to grow his seed.

0:26:060:26:10

Perhaps it takes a man who has tasted temptation

0:26:100:26:12

to know whether God would smile upon it or not.

0:26:120:26:15

If we are all in his image,

0:26:150:26:16

does he not share our inclinations?

0:26:160:26:18

Father Pascal must be beating them off with a poleaxe.

0:26:180:26:21

-You are vexed, madame.

-I am not vexed!

0:26:210:26:23

I just have a growing slug of a baby inside my belly

0:26:230:26:26

and it's pressing down on my bladder with considerable force.

0:26:260:26:29

Madame, if you please... I'm attempting to help you.

0:26:290:26:32

Au contraire, Bishop, you are attempting to coerce me!

0:26:320:26:34

And before I leak all over your cassock, I suggest you take a minute

0:26:340:26:38

to consider quite how appalling your life will become

0:26:380:26:40

if you continue in this manner.

0:26:400:26:42

Consider yourself warned.

0:26:420:26:44

Fetch me a chamber pot! Hurry!

0:26:550:26:57

SHE SIGHS

0:26:570:26:59

SHE GROANS

0:27:000:27:02

SHE EXHALES

0:27:030:27:05

TRICKLING

0:27:090:27:11

SHE SIGHS

0:27:130:27:15

Madame.

0:27:200:27:22

I saw you in the salon,

0:27:220:27:23

I thought you looked full of poise.

0:27:230:27:26

Turns out you were full of piss.

0:27:260:27:28

You are in my way.

0:27:280:27:30

-The King is waiting for me.

-Hmm...

0:27:300:27:33

I wonder what he'd think if he knew that his little kitten

0:27:330:27:35

likes to urinate in the corners.

0:27:350:27:38

I'd imagine he couldn't care less.

0:27:380:27:40

-HE CHUCKLES

-I remember this game.

0:27:400:27:42

The game has changed, dear heart,

0:27:420:27:44

-or have you not noticed?!

-SLAP!

0:27:440:27:46

SCUFFLING

0:27:460:27:48

When he discards you like a bad oyster, and he will,

0:27:480:27:52

I shall be waiting for you, my dear!

0:27:520:27:54

SHE BREATHES RAGGEDLY

0:28:010:28:03

SHE STIFLES SOBS

0:28:140:28:16

INDISTINCT CONVERSATION

0:28:190:28:21

..One has to have lived through martyrdom to become...

0:28:210:28:23

DOOR OPENS

0:28:230:28:25

I noticed you've recently acquired a new piece of furniture.

0:28:340:28:39

What was your intention in bringing it to court?

0:28:400:28:43

It seemed to me we needed to make an important addition to our chapel.

0:28:450:28:49

Better to praise God.

0:28:490:28:50

I do not care for it. It clashes.

0:28:500:28:53

Any additions should be approved by me and me alone.

0:28:530:28:56

Perhaps you should not judge it so harshly, my king.

0:28:570:29:00

-Perhaps time...

-I advise you to get rid of it.

0:29:000:29:03

It is valued very highly in Rome.

0:29:060:29:08

DOOR CLOSES

0:29:120:29:13

HE STAMPS

0:29:220:29:24

What on earth are you wearing?

0:29:260:29:28

-What am

-I

-wearing?

0:29:280:29:29

It's a little dull...

0:29:290:29:31

This is not.

0:29:310:29:33

Do you like it?

0:29:330:29:35

I designed it myself.

0:29:350:29:37

The Italians love silk,

0:29:380:29:41

and colour.

0:29:410:29:42

We have colours in France.

0:29:420:29:44

-NICE ones.

-HE CHUCKLES

0:29:450:29:47

I was thinking.

0:29:500:29:52

Every year.

0:29:530:29:54

Every change of season.

0:29:540:29:57

We impose a new rule.

0:29:570:30:01

A new colour!

0:30:010:30:03

An accent, something fun.

0:30:030:30:04

If enough people join in -

0:30:040:30:06

other people will feel left out if they do not belong.

0:30:060:30:09

We could RULE by colour.

0:30:090:30:10

This winter will be blue!

0:30:120:30:15

-Not blue.

-Why not?

0:30:150:30:17

It's the King's colour.

0:30:170:30:19

Red, then.

0:30:220:30:23

A rich crimson.

0:30:230:30:25

Fashion will be our standard, darling,

0:30:280:30:30

and the people will walk behind you.

0:30:300:30:32

And me.

0:30:330:30:35

I understand why you would want your friend to attend you,

0:30:360:30:39

but why here?

0:30:390:30:40

Madame Scarron is very fond of children, and she's extremely quiet.

0:30:400:30:43

Bontemps, do we have room in the nursery?

0:30:430:30:46

It might be feasible, Sire,

0:30:460:30:48

but Versailles is hardly a place for young children.

0:30:480:30:52

Well, then, that will change when they get here.

0:30:520:30:55

Only royal children may have a nurse or governess at Versailles.

0:30:550:30:59

My children are royal!

0:30:590:31:01

Or has their paternity escaped you?!

0:31:010:31:03

I am merely saying, madame, we must follow protocol.

0:31:030:31:06

It is the bedrock of our life here.

0:31:060:31:09

My children will be safe,

0:31:090:31:10

and there is no safer place in France than at Versailles!

0:31:100:31:13

Or would you not agree?

0:31:130:31:15

RETREATING FOOTSTEPS

0:31:180:31:20

Is there space for Scarron?

0:31:220:31:24

If it pleases Your Majesty.

0:31:250:31:27

See that it is done.

0:31:280:31:30

At once, Sire.

0:31:300:31:31

How big you are getting...!

0:31:430:31:45

STREET BUSTLE

0:31:500:31:52

SHE KNOCKS

0:32:030:32:05

My goodness, look at you, have you seen a ghost?

0:32:100:32:14

When a woman has a child,

0:32:170:32:20

her body changes.

0:32:200:32:21

I have seen women who were butchered by birth.

0:32:230:32:26

So much so that they never recover.

0:32:270:32:29

You are exhausted, dear.

0:32:310:32:33

The King is surrounded by beauty,

0:32:350:32:37

all day, every day.

0:32:370:32:40

I am still his favourite but one day, that will change.

0:32:400:32:43

This baby will only hasten the inevitable.

0:32:430:32:46

Mandrake.

0:32:460:32:47

Keep it with you, always.

0:32:490:32:52

She is...kicking you at night.

0:33:000:33:04

In the left rib with her heel.

0:33:050:33:08

So close to your heart, it sometimes feels like it could break.

0:33:090:33:13

She's...

0:33:140:33:16

compounding the hurt you already feel.

0:33:160:33:19

But the man you fear...

0:33:220:33:24

..is not the one who is going to harm you.

0:33:250:33:28

He's far away, no matter how close he gets.

0:33:280:33:30

The one you must truly fear is the one who is closest.

0:33:310:33:37

It is there...

0:33:370:33:38

..inside your guard,

0:33:390:33:41

that you lay yourself wide open.

0:33:410:33:43

But then, my dear...

0:33:450:33:46

..you already know that.

0:33:470:33:49

That is why you are still here.

0:33:510:33:53

HORSES WHINNY

0:34:190:34:22

Coo-ee!

0:34:570:34:58

Good morning!

0:35:010:35:02

Must be so easy to ming on the road if you're a man.

0:35:020:35:05

Don't even have to stop the coach moving,

0:35:050:35:07

you simply shove it out of the window and water the weeds.

0:35:070:35:10

You must be Philippe.

0:35:100:35:12

I'm Liselotte, Princess Palatine, nice to meet you.

0:35:120:35:15

You're late.

0:35:150:35:16

Delighted to make your acquaintance.

0:35:180:35:20

What happens now?

0:35:240:35:25

I'm not sure...

0:35:270:35:29

-What page are you on?

-Um...

0:35:290:35:31

One.

0:35:320:35:33

How about, "Good morning"?

0:35:350:35:36

I brought some gifts for you and your children -

0:35:390:35:41

I hope that's acceptable -

0:35:410:35:42

I wasn't going to come all this way empty-handed.

0:35:420:35:44

My children...?

0:35:450:35:47

Are they here? Where are they?

0:35:470:35:48

HE CHOKES

0:35:480:35:50

They are in Saint Germain with their governess.

0:35:500:35:54

-Then when do you see them?

-"See" them...?

0:35:540:35:56

Well, then...

0:35:580:35:59

Anyway...

0:35:590:36:01

THAT is for Marie Louise. I hear she enjoys writing letters

0:36:010:36:03

and I hope she might write one to me one day.

0:36:030:36:05

And the pony is for Anne Marie.

0:36:050:36:09

I hope it'll make her happy.

0:36:090:36:10

I used to love horses as a little girl, I hope she will, too.

0:36:100:36:13

You are very...

0:36:130:36:15

kind.

0:36:150:36:17

I cannot hide it, I adore children.

0:36:170:36:19

Talking of which, we should probably get going.

0:36:190:36:21

Shouldn't we...?

0:36:220:36:24

What?

0:36:250:36:27

Oh, no! Oh, goodness no!

0:36:290:36:31

I meant, your girls must be missing you, and you them.

0:36:310:36:33

Coming all the way out here to meet a strange woman.

0:36:330:36:36

We could visit them, if you like.

0:36:360:36:39

Please bring them down here to the country. Let them climb a few trees.

0:36:390:36:42

Good for girls to get their knees dirty!

0:36:420:36:44

Anyway, you're the prince of my life now, you make the rules.

0:36:440:36:47

Should we go? I'm so excited to meet your brother.

0:36:470:36:50

Good day.

0:37:070:37:09

I am not here.

0:37:100:37:12

-Yes, you are.

-I can assure you I am not. However...

0:37:120:37:15

I thought you were in Italy.

0:37:150:37:17

I was. But now, I am here -

0:37:170:37:19

or rather, I am NOT here.

0:37:190:37:21

Since my friend is meeting his new bride in Versailles,

0:37:210:37:23

I thought I would press my advantage and NOT be here with you,

0:37:230:37:28

which I am currently...doing.

0:37:280:37:30

I hope I'm making myself clear.

0:37:300:37:32

I am NOT here

0:37:320:37:34

because I wish to speak with you urgently

0:37:340:37:36

concerning a confidential medical matter.

0:37:360:37:40

You're sick?

0:37:400:37:42

It's hard to explain.

0:37:430:37:44

So don't.

0:37:440:37:46

Perhaps...

0:37:470:37:49

Perhaps I might allude to it.

0:37:510:37:52

HE CLEARS HIS THROAT

0:37:520:37:55

Certain bodily functions...

0:37:550:37:57

..carry with them certain expectations,

0:37:580:38:00

inasmuch as when one opens one's eyes during the day,

0:38:000:38:03

one expects to...see.

0:38:030:38:06

Similarly, when one releases one's bladder, one expects to urinate.

0:38:060:38:11

Or rather, one is accustomed to the idea that the act of pissing

0:38:110:38:15

offers much in the way of relief and wellbeing, as opposed to...

0:38:150:38:20

excruciating torments of unbearable pain.

0:38:200:38:23

-It hurts when you piss?

-Like a cascade of jagged tadpoles

0:38:230:38:25

thrashing downstream to spawn. I hope I am making myself clear.

0:38:250:38:29

May I see?

0:38:300:38:31

You may.

0:38:310:38:32

HE CLEARS HIS THROAT

0:38:410:38:42

-HE SHUDDERS

-Does it hurt?

-Cold hands.

0:38:490:38:53

Cold hands!

0:38:530:38:54

I can see no chancres.

0:38:550:38:57

The discomfort will pass.

0:38:570:38:59

And the pain?

0:38:590:39:00

I can give you a rosemary balm.

0:39:020:39:04

Am I to roast a spatchcock? What am I to do with that?

0:39:040:39:06

Rub it. The affected area.

0:39:060:39:09

Rubbing is what got me into this in the first place.

0:39:090:39:11

I can also give you a mercury tincture -

0:39:110:39:13

that should tackle the problem.

0:39:130:39:15

And if the edge were to remain?

0:39:150:39:18

Do you have something stronger?

0:39:200:39:21

Hm?

0:39:210:39:22

I do not.

0:39:220:39:24

Fine.

0:39:240:39:25

Just...hurry it up, will you?

0:39:250:39:27

LOW CONVERSATION

0:39:290:39:30

FIRE CRACKLES

0:39:350:39:38

Madame de Reynaud, was this the powder?

0:39:590:40:03

Mine came in silver phials.

0:40:040:40:06

For which I paid a premium, no doubt.

0:40:060:40:09

Tell me again how you came by it.

0:40:090:40:11

As I told you before.

0:40:120:40:14

I would speak to my friends, they would speak to theirs.

0:40:140:40:17

I would settle my account and the powders would arrive.

0:40:170:40:20

When will you release me?

0:40:230:40:25

I fear that giving you freedom now may place you at risk.

0:40:260:40:29

Monsieur Marchal! >

0:40:510:40:52

LOUD CHOKING

0:40:540:40:56

Move!

0:40:560:40:58

< GAGGING

0:41:020:41:03

SHE CHOKES

0:41:030:41:05

War is imminent.

0:41:050:41:07

And yet, Sire, I must report once again,

0:41:070:41:09

there are obstacles to a free and full assault on the Dutch.

0:41:090:41:12

Several of our key staging posts are refusing to garrison our men,

0:41:130:41:18

or feed or water them.

0:41:180:41:20

In the Spanish Netherlands, I presume.

0:41:200:41:22

In France, Sire.

0:41:230:41:25

France.

0:41:270:41:28

Is that so?

0:41:290:41:31

What is the nature of these staging posts?

0:41:330:41:36

Are they hamlets?

0:41:370:41:38

Towns?

0:41:380:41:39

Friaries and monasteries, Sire.

0:41:400:41:42

And what is happening to the men when they are turned away?

0:41:440:41:48

They sleep rough, forage,

0:41:480:41:50

go hungry.

0:41:500:41:52

An army marches on its stomach!

0:41:550:41:58

Bishop!

0:42:090:42:11

Here I am.

0:42:170:42:18

Have I not helped you gain power, and keep it?

0:42:180:42:22

You have, Sire.

0:42:240:42:26

Why, then, do you defy my will?

0:42:260:42:27

I do not defy you, Majesty.

0:42:290:42:31

Does the abbey at Nivelles stand in my kingdom?

0:42:310:42:34

It does, Sire.

0:42:350:42:37

And do the friars there take their holy direction through you, Bishop?

0:42:370:42:41

Through the Church, Sire, in Rome.

0:42:410:42:44

Running first through you, Bishop!

0:42:440:42:46

It was not my decision, Sire, but Rome's.

0:42:460:42:49

Then Rome must be made aware,

0:42:490:42:51

that they must keep their Roman noses out of our business!

0:42:510:42:55

Tighter.

0:43:430:43:44

Tighter.

0:43:460:43:48

I do not think that would be beneficial, madame,

0:43:480:43:50

to the child.

0:43:500:43:52

I do not recall asking your opinion on the matter.

0:43:520:43:55

Perhaps you should rest in bed for a while.

0:43:570:43:59

How, precisely, am I supposed to attend

0:43:590:44:01

one of the most important celebrations of the year

0:44:010:44:03

if I'm confined to my room?

0:44:030:44:05

That is not advisable at this stage.

0:44:050:44:07

It would be very tiring for you.

0:44:070:44:09

For you, perhaps.

0:44:090:44:11

Consider your health, madame.

0:44:140:44:16

I understand it must seem like simple common sense,

0:44:160:44:18

but this is far too tight.

0:44:180:44:20

For example, you may be constricting blood flow to your child...

0:44:200:44:23

You know, there is a reason our finest medical minds

0:44:230:44:26

treat only the noble families.

0:44:260:44:28

They understand what is expected of a person, what is required,

0:44:280:44:31

and what is to be done to achieve it.

0:44:310:44:33

Now, until you understand that,

0:44:330:44:35

you are no help to me whatsoever.

0:44:350:44:37

CHATTER NEARBY

0:44:370:44:39

DOOR OPENS

0:44:400:44:41

Princess Elisabeth Charlotte,

0:45:130:45:17

the Princess Palatine.

0:45:170:45:19

Welcome to Versailles.

0:45:190:45:21

Thank you, Majesty.

0:45:210:45:23

APPLAUSE

0:45:230:45:27

BAROQUE MUSIC PLAYS

0:45:270:45:29

TRICKLING

0:45:500:45:52

I was beginning to think you would never return.

0:45:520:45:55

You were correct.

0:45:560:45:58

What changed your mind?

0:45:580:46:00

I was spoken to.

0:46:010:46:03

From on high.

0:46:040:46:05

So...

0:46:070:46:08

You are here out of duty.

0:46:100:46:11

A blind obedience to a higher power,

0:46:130:46:15

just like everyone else.

0:46:150:46:17

They're here because...

0:46:180:46:19

you want them to be.

0:46:190:46:21

There is no other reason.

0:46:210:46:23

What you want, you get.

0:46:240:46:26

You must have realised that by now.

0:46:290:46:31

Tell me, are your jurisdictions able to take full advantage

0:46:390:46:42

of the current increase in the price of cereal crops?

0:46:420:46:46

Um... Yes?

0:46:480:46:49

Hm!

0:46:500:46:52

You know she has wooden teeth?

0:46:580:47:00

It's true.

0:47:020:47:03

Careful, Your Highness! That may be poisoned.

0:47:040:47:07

You're not eating?

0:47:180:47:20

Not like that.

0:47:210:47:23

Do you come here often?

0:47:240:47:25

Not in this room, no.

0:47:260:47:28

Oh, I saw some stains on the floor, I assumed one of them was you.

0:47:300:47:33

HE CHORTLES

0:47:330:47:34

Do you dance?

0:47:350:47:37

You will have to learn.

0:47:370:47:39

What for?

0:47:390:47:40

You shall look ridiculous if you do not participate.

0:47:400:47:44

I am standing here talking to my new husband's lover,

0:47:440:47:46

I am well aware of how ridiculous I look.

0:47:460:47:49

HORSE WHINNIES NEARBY

0:47:550:47:57

SCRAPING

0:47:590:48:01

I wouldn't do that if I were you.

0:48:090:48:10

-Who's there?

-After you, young man.

0:48:120:48:15

My name is Pierre Dubois. And you?

0:48:170:48:21

Jacques.

0:48:210:48:22

Is that your family name?

0:48:220:48:24

I have no family.

0:48:240:48:25

I work for the King.

0:48:250:48:27

What, as a "tree guard"?

0:48:270:48:28

As a "guard-ener".

0:48:280:48:30

What on earth are you doing all the way out here?

0:48:320:48:34

Wild boar are eating my bulbs in the gardens.

0:48:340:48:37

I followed the tracks from the garden to here.

0:48:370:48:39

How about you?

0:48:390:48:41

I must confess, I'm a little lost.

0:48:410:48:45

Is that your initials you're carving in the King's tree?

0:48:460:48:50

To speak truthfully, Jacques...

0:48:500:48:52

..I'm supposed to meet a young lady out here.

0:48:540:48:56

I confess, for a moment, I thought you might be her husband.

0:48:560:48:59

I suppose I should be flattered.

0:49:010:49:02

Don't worry.

0:49:030:49:05

-Your secret's safe with me.

-Thank you.

0:49:060:49:09

THEY GRUNT

0:49:160:49:18

METAL SCRAPES

0:49:220:49:24

JACQUES ROARS

0:49:270:49:29

WET SLICING, JACQUES YELLS

0:49:410:49:44

HE GROANS

0:49:440:49:46

< CHOKING AND COUGHING

0:49:500:49:52

BLADE SLICES, WET TRICKLING

0:49:530:49:55

HE RETCHES

0:49:570:49:59

BLADE CLATTERS

0:49:590:50:01

HE CHOKES

0:50:110:50:13

Not long now.

0:50:210:50:23

You will never win.

0:50:250:50:26

So far so good.

0:50:290:50:31

I see...new trees...

0:50:340:50:37

..marching in formation...

0:50:390:50:42

Well...

0:50:440:50:46

You will be food for them now.

0:50:460:50:48

I will make a damn...

0:50:500:50:52

..fine...tree...

0:50:530:50:56

BAROQUE MUSIC PLAYS

0:51:050:51:08

What a surprise to see you.

0:51:170:51:19

ALIVE, I mean...

0:51:200:51:22

SHE PANTS

0:51:220:51:23

Much water has passed under the bridge.

0:51:230:51:26

Careful you don't drown in it.

0:51:260:51:28

SHE EXHALES

0:51:370:51:39

IRRITABLY: What is the matter?

0:51:400:51:43

Nothing... Nothing, I'm fine.

0:51:430:51:44

SHE GASPS FOR BREATH

0:51:440:51:47

SHE BREATHES RAGGEDLY

0:52:070:52:10

-ALL EXCLAIM

-Get away from me!

0:52:100:52:12

SHE PANTS

0:52:120:52:13

I am fine... A small slip is all.

0:52:140:52:17

SHE SCREAMS

0:52:170:52:19

Help her!

0:52:210:52:22

SHE CRIES IN PAIN

0:52:220:52:24

Hurry up!

0:52:240:52:26

SHE WHIMPERS

0:52:270:52:29

CONCERNED MURMURS

0:52:290:52:31

Is it always like this here?

0:52:350:52:37

I'm afraid so.

0:52:390:52:40

PAINED GROANS

0:52:400:52:42

MONTESPAN PANTS

0:52:440:52:47

SHE GROANS

0:52:490:52:51

-Push!

-MONTESPAN SCREAMS

0:52:590:53:02

Push!

0:53:020:53:04

Yes, it's opening! Beautiful!

0:53:040:53:05

PANTING

0:53:050:53:07

And...yes...

0:53:070:53:09

Push! Push!

0:53:090:53:11

MONTESPAN SCREAMS

0:53:110:53:14

Keep breathing, keep breathing...

0:53:140:53:16

Breathe...breathe...

0:53:170:53:19

And push!

0:53:190:53:21

Push!

0:53:210:53:22

SHE SCREAMS

0:53:220:53:24

Keep pushing! You're doing wonderful!

0:53:260:53:29

SHE SCREAMS

0:53:290:53:31

Yes, just give me one last push!

0:53:310:53:33

Push!

0:53:330:53:34

SCREAMS ECHO

0:53:340:53:36

SCREAMS FADE

0:53:360:53:40

WIND WHOOSHES

0:53:400:53:42

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